December 1, 2023 • 26 mins
Ever been at the mercy of someone showing you an unsolicited video? Or maybe you've been on a plane and witnessed someone taking their shoes AND 🧦 off?
This week I'm airing these champagne problems and more in a short but hearty episode, the 9th round of #ThingsThatBug. This segment never ceases getting juicier with time.
I'm not just sassing it up, though! Also tune in for:
- An exploration of discomfort in awkward situations 🙃
- Letting people be without taking things personally
- Some of the pleasures in life that make me the happiest
PLUS....A steamy new song! Don't miss it ❤️🔥🎵
Links to follow me/subscribe:
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey everyone, it's Tiff and welcome back from the
Thanksgiving break.
I know that I didn't let youknow that I would be doing that
until that email went out acouple days before, and that's
because I had no idea.
(00:22):
So I genuinely appreciate yourpatience with me.
I had every intention ofdropping an episode last week
and then I listened to my body.
I paid attention to howoverwhelmed I was.
I realized that this is my showand I have to do what works for
me.
I'm a one-woman system here andI needed to step away from all
of it, from working on thepodcast, from looking at my
social media, from everything.
(00:42):
And I do feel a lot better.
And so, while I don't want tomake breaks a habit, I know when
they're needed and I reallyappreciate you, baron, with me.
With that said, I hope thateveryone had a good week and is
excited for December.
I am someone who has both of mytrees up ready.
I have a little mini one in myoffice and I have the one
downstairs.
Some people are highly againstthis and are like December 1st
(01:03):
robust.
I don't give a shit.
I think everyone should do whatthey want to do and stop giving
a shit when anyone else does.
I guess that'll be my firstthing.
That bugs today is people whoare like you have your tree up.
Yeah, I do what's it to you.
It's my house.
Do what you want in yours, Idon't give a shit.
With that said, this is thingsthat bug number nine.
We're gonna get sassy, it'llstill be classy.
I have a lot of things to sayBefore I jump into it.
(01:24):
I did have a couple people askif I would be making ornaments
this year like I did last year.
The answer is no.
Due to bandwidth, I have noextra time to bust those out.
So if you purchased one lastyear, you have a collector's
item.
You may even have a one of akind kind of piece.
So cherish it, love it, cherishit, get it.
No pun intended, cherish it.
I'm sorry.
Hopefully I'll be back nextyear, but I just cannot.
(01:45):
I cannot.
But I hope that everyone enjoysthis Hollywood season.
Hollywood Holy day, oh my God.
Okay, let's officially startthis episode.
This is a hot segment.
We've been moving, we've beengrooving for a while.
Think it's time.
Things that bug number nine.
(02:06):
It's time for things that bug.
If you recall that was the newsegment sound that Gabe gave me
(02:36):
shit for having a solo during.
He's like I don't know if itneeds a solo and I was like it
definitely does.
But here we are, things thatbug.
The first one is when someonewants to pull up a video to show
me.
I literally don't care whateverit is.
It's my nightmare to beinvolved in a conversation with
someone and it starts going thedirection of have you seen that
Tik Tok?
Or have you seen that videowhere?
And they go, oh, let me pull itup.
Cringe.
Butthole is in my stomach Idon't want to see.
(02:58):
At best send it to me for later.
But even that I don't reallywant, like, if I missed it, I
missed it, you know, tell meabout it.
But honestly, tea and shade myhusband is the worst offender.
People taking their shoes andsocks off on the plane Are you
kidding me?
The fact that I even have tosay this?
Why aren't you disgusted like Iam and I mean in terms of the
germs A, b people might have tosmell that C there's nothing you
(03:21):
can really do.
I mean, I'm not someone who'sgoing to say shit, and so I just
think it's rude to put everyoneelse around you in that
situation.
It's just like people eat hardboiled eggs on planes.
People clip their nails onplanes Like what are we doing?
folks?
I never want to see your toes,ever.
If you're a stranger and I knowthat I go see toes out from
strangers all the time but we'realready too close on the plane.
(03:41):
It already smells weird.
I start thinking of your feetsweating hair.
I don't know, it's too much.
Put your fucking shoes on,absolutely not.
But I'm also not gonna riskgoing to crazy town on this
plane by saying something thisone's kind of petty, but it's
fucking true.
When your friends never likeyour photos on Instagram but
they like every influencer, theyfollow those photos.
I'm like, oh, you give a shitwhat Kim Kardashian is doing,
(04:03):
but you can't be out heresupporting my podcast, like what
the fuck?
People you don't even know hispictures, but not your friends.
If it comes up in my algorithmand you're my friend, I'm really
trying to like it.
I just don't understand andthat's petty and I'm sorry and I
know that people have the rightto like whatever the hell they
want, but this is things thatbug the place where we air
things that are dumb butannoying.
Also on social media.
It bugs that my platform can'tbe private because I want more
(04:27):
and more listeners to find me,etc.
But there are people out thereable to look at my profile, but
I'm not able to see theirs, myhaters, my creepers If you are
gonna look at my shit, I shouldbe able to look at your shit.
Or people who leave meancomments and then they're
private.
It's like half the guts, man.
I like things to go both ways,but I don't get to control this
one either.
Next, walking into spider webs.
(04:47):
Is there anything worse?
Okay, there's a lot worse, butit's so unexpected Like I think
immediately a spider is in myhair or trapped in my clothes
and it's having babies or it'sbiting me and it's gonna live in
my ears.
I saw a tiktok the other day, awoman showing that a spider had
crawled in her ear While shewas sleeping and it was there
for like three days and then itcame out at the doctor and it
was like crawling on the floorand I literally bought earplugs
(05:09):
and have been sleeping with thembecause I'm paranoid now that
that's gonna happen.
So, anyway, there's this spotin our backyard where this
spider keeps making this web andI keep taking it down because
I'm like this can't be your home, like this is the major walkway
, like I can't do this with youevery day.
It keeps bringing it back and Ijust I don't know.
It really bums me out and itscares me, and I know they're
just trying to survive on thisPlanet too.
So I'm sorry to you, mr Spider,for messing with your house.
(05:32):
I get why you would hate me.
For sure.
People who are always busierthan you flex in their busyness
just every time you talk to them.
They're like how are you doing?
And I'm like all right, no,yeah, I'm fucking busy, I'm
crazy busy.
But I stay busy night and day,like there is no stop to this
grinding, and I'm like didn'tyou just ask how I'm doing?
There's talking and thenthere's weird competing and
there's people who just thriveoff of being busy and having
(05:53):
everyone around them know thatthey're busy.
It's like if you need thistrophy, you can have it.
Ordering a drink from the bar oh, I hate it.
Like a crowded bar, you have tolike squeeze in there, try to
make eye contact.
You do?
They seem to be ignoring you.
You're like okay, great, nowwhat do I do?
It's not even their fault.
They're just busy too.
I'm not a pushy person.
I don't like to squeeze intocrevices.
(06:13):
I would much rather be sittingat a socially appropriately
distanced table from otherpeople and a waiter comes up and
asks hey, what do you want?
This is why I make reservationseverywhere I go, because I
don't want to be in thatposition.
And if we are in that position,I'll just send Gabe up and be
like I'll stand over here.
I can't even enter thatmonstrosity of a mosh pit.
Plus the power dynamic in myhead between me and the
(06:35):
bartender.
It's just too much.
I'll be over here or I'll go toa different place that has no
line, even if it's trash.
And then, if they do come up toyou, you tell them and they're
like what?
You're like I'm out of control.
They're like what?
And it's like oh my god, we'regonna have to make out for you
to hear what I'm saying.
Let's just skip it.
Let's just skip it.
Let's not forget that I was abartender and I also hated it.
From the other side too.
I didn't enjoy it.
(06:57):
That's just me.
This is one I don't think I'veever said, and I do think it's
very common.
But when people rev theirengines out in public, you're
just sitting on a bench Enjoyingthe breeze on your face and all
of a sudden it's like, and it'slike okay, why did we all need
to know you're there, you'redriving, I see you.
Hi, hello, I don't want to beskirt.
Okay, there's no reason forthat, unless you're in.
(07:19):
What is it called?
The one that they're all racingf1, unless you're a Jeff Fox
worthy or whoever used to race,which is NASCAR, I think.
Go home and quietly Editingtiff.
Here I definitely meant JeffGordon.
Okay, back to the show.
Oh, this one I've definitelysaid, but needs to be said for
the fucking people in the backdogs off leash when they're not
in their own house or backyard.
(07:40):
Okay, I'm not even gonna getstarted because I'm already
getting heated.
Another thing that bugs Tedlasso.
I said it, I said it.
I didn't like it, and the factthat everyone hates that I
didn't like it bugs me even more.
Okay, different strokes,different folks.
My husband loves it.
I can't stand it.
Sue me Fucking, sue me hecklers.
I go to a lot of comedy showsand they think this is their
(08:01):
moment.
They're time to shine.
Nobody wants it.
Come for the show or bust.
If you want to be up here withthe mic, do the work.
It takes.
Okay, littering.
Are we still doing this?
We are, knock it off.
We know how bad it is andpeople just still continue to
not give a lick.
There's just trash everywhereon this earth.
So much trash.
Shame on you if you're stilldropping it around.
(08:22):
This is a really niche one.
But me being so anal aboutgetting my Christmas and holiday
shopping done early that Imissed amazing Black Friday
deals on the same things Ibought anyway and paid double
the price on many, many itemsJust because I didn't think
about it couldn't wait.
This happens to me every singleyear.
Yeah, don't that.
(08:42):
I don't that.
I'm damn.
Morning breath.
We all have it, but it's gross.
Personally, strangers you know.
When you're like walking throughjust a Starbucks and it's
morning time and like everyone'sin there, it's that smell in
the air before 10 am.
That's just people's breathaccumulated together in one big
cloud and it smells like coffeeand farts and root beer and like
(09:05):
wet moss in a forest and Ithink they might have already
brushed their teeth Like that'sthe tea and it still smells like
that.
And I'm not trying to be rude,I swear I'm not gonna say
anything to any of these people,it's just something I've
noticed.
Lackluster burritos Can we justagree?
They're sad when they're smalland there's not much in them.
Like you're excited for a fat,juicy burrito and it comes and
(09:25):
it's just like flopping to theside, it's like dripping out.
There's nothing really in it.
It's like, hmm, what a bummer.
Whenever you find yourself in asituation where people are
genuinely arguing in front ofyou, it's another one of those
things that we maybe have alldone, but it's so awkward and no
one knows what to do and itdefinitely makes everyone around
you uncomfortable.
There's like casual bickering,classic things that we all do as
(09:47):
humans.
But then there's like seriousstuff that you realize you
should not be a part of anddon't want to be and shouldn't
be exposed to, you know.
So I don't know though Maybethat's a personal thing in like
how much conflict you wereexposed to as a child and stuff.
Times like you're coping skillsin bandwidth I don't know, I
don't know what I'm sayingEating at any point without
access to a napkin or a sink towash your hands, like literally,
(10:09):
if I don't have one of thosethings, I don't know if I even
want to eat.
Okay, that's traumatic.
That's not true but you know,when you're eating something,
you're really enjoying it.
And then you realize, oh, myhands are a little dirty.
And you're looking aroundYou're like, oh my God, there's
no access to anything.
How did this happen?
The only thing you're going touse is your fingers licky, licky
, or your pants wipey, wipey,but then you're sticky, icky
(10:29):
when people come at me hot and,honestly, when I come at people
hot, it greatly disappoints mewhen I do it, because I know how
painful it is.
Just give me the benefit of thedoubt.
Let's talk like humans.
I don't like it.
It all leads to me shuttingdown and feeling unsafe, but I
will feel very protective ofmyself too, and that's some
inner child shit.
Trolls this is an interestingtake that I was thinking about
(10:50):
the other day.
I don't know if anyone's seenthe escaping twin flames
documentary, but after I watchedit I understood the urge to
want to troll someone.
Like I found the leaders ofthis cult's Instagram and I was
like I'm going to write them andI'm going to say mean stuff.
And I stopped myself and I'mlike what, what is the point to
hurt them?
Yes, okay, we're not going todo that.
It actually doesn't do anything.
(11:12):
It ultimately won't fixanything.
It won't make me feel better.
There are other ways to standwith the cause, against them or
to disagree with them, but thisis the difference Someone who
doesn't have that moment, thatpause where they go.
Oh wait, I get that.
I'm having these big feelingsand wanting to do something
because I'm feeling hurt or hurtthat other people are getting
(11:33):
hurt, but the answer is not hurtpeople hurting people.
And so the other day, when Igot the little baby urge to
troll, I was like, oh my God,like this is how it happens and
it's interesting to think about.
And I feel bad because back inthe day I remember I did troll
Selena Gomez.
I made a mean comment on one ofher Instagram posts and her
fans fucking came for me and Iwas like arguing back and forth
(11:54):
with them.
And I think about that now andI'm like God, that's so
embarrassing, like why, who thefuck did I think I was, I was
jealous of her, I was wantingher to feel bad.
So what?
I could feel better about beingmy shitty self, glad for growth
, I'm glad for awareness, andit's just another reminder that
there are people hurting fuckingeverywhere, and when they get
behind their little phones andscreens.
(12:15):
They think they're brave, butit's not brave to attack someone
online.
An unexpected musical number ina movie.
If I didn't sign up for amusical, I don't want to be in
for the surprise of a lifetimeAbsolutely not.
People might find thissurprising.
Not a big musical guy, not atall.
When people get mad thatthey're not invited to something
, I'm guilty of it too, but Ihave to check myself.
(12:35):
I don't want everyone ateverything, so why would they?
People are allowed to do whatthey do, folks.
That is the theme, the threadthat is carrying us through to
the end.
Let people do what they want todo, because they have their
reasons and it's not personal.
Just people doing the dishesand then leaving the sink gross
with like extra food left over.
It's not drained or disposed.
There's just kind of a stankgoing around like please just
(12:57):
wrap it up, just take the extrafew seconds to clean that,
because it does snowball so fastinto a swamp.
And who needs that?
A pillow fight I've never likeda pillow fight.
They kind of hurt people, getcrazy.
And why would anyone like theirhead being smacked?
You know I've always wonderedhow that's fun or sexy.
You know people almost pin itas this, like hot things that
(13:18):
girls do at sleepovers.
We weren't doing that.
We were talking about how toshave our legs and if you've
used a tampon yet, okay, thisnext one that bugs, I'm gonna
get vulnerable with you all.
It's something on my body and Idon't need you to be like tough
.
Tough, no, not that, never, Isee it, I know, okay.
I just hate that I have like aturkey gobble.
My chin isn't a distinct chinor jaw line.
(13:42):
That's all.
Editing Tiff here I apparentlymeant a turkey waddle, not a
gobble.
Makes a lot of sense when Ithink about it.
Okay, bye Running into peopleunexpectedly that you know out
and about.
I hate that.
It only happens when I go hometo my hometown.
But there's nothing worse thanyou're just looking through an
office and they go, oh my God,and you're like, fuck, who is it
(14:02):
gonna be?
Never someone you want to see,ever.
And now it's starting to happenwhere I live and I'm like, oh
no, I've been here too long.
Gotta get out, gotta get moving.
I'm like a vampire.
They're starting to tell thatI'm 19 for the fifth year in the
row.
Does anyone else, if you know?
You know this one is anotherpetty one, but it's the truth.
People not listening to mypodcast A, I think more people
(14:22):
should, but B it's when they sayto me like I haven't listened
but I should, and it's like justsay nothing In my head.
You listen when you're a guestto an event and you have a
friend who's also a guest.
They're not hosting, they'rejust a guest and you guys are
both going to this and they askyou for gift ideas.
Now, bitch, work harder.
I did it.
I figured out what to get thisperson you figure out.
Now you can't come on my card.
(14:43):
First of all, they usually havea registry and, second of all,
you don't know them well enoughto know a single thing they'd
like.
Why is your problem now on myplate?
Do I help my husband bypresence for other people?
Sure, but do I want to do itfor everyone in my life?
No, also, you're not going totake credit for my fire idea
(15:04):
that I put thought into.
Absolutely not.
That's when you say no.
Is anyone else noticing that myvoice?
When I get super irritatedabout something, I go, I go high
.
I don't like that.
Next, I delete my texts.
I do that because I like toknow a conversation is done.
It stresses me out to have themthere.
I have everything started fromzero by the end of the day, even
(15:24):
with my husband.
I just delete them, I move onand sometimes when I tell people
about this they're like you'rehiding something.
I'm not.
It's the reason I just said andI have no insecurity about it,
and I don't know why you doeither.
With that said, it's sadbecause I can't go back to
things and I won't be able towhen people pass away and things
like that, but also becauseeveryone has free will and just
(15:44):
like I'm allowed to delete them,people are allowed to save them
.
This means I'm sometimes behindthe curve.
Other people in my life thatdon't delete their texts can go
back and read all these thingswe've said and remember
idiosyncrasies of things that Idon't.
I don't even know.
Tiff five minutes ago, who isshe, what she said, I don't know
.
And I've moved on.
I don't want to resonate thereand read old things, and maybe
(16:07):
that's wrong, but I hate in thatway that someone has like a
cheat code book that I don'tanymore and might remember me in
a way that isn't even me.
Yet I chose to throw this cheatcode away, because do we even
need the cheat codes?
What am I talking about Next?
Pimples, zits, whatever you callthem on the upper lip or like
(16:29):
right where the nose hole is.
You know, those are so painful,can we all agree?
And they bug because they'reembarrassing.
It's hard to cover them.
They refuel.
Yeah, crazy how packed theschedule gets at the holidays
every time, no matter how muchyou try to avoid it.
It's just like a thing andanother thing.
Another thing you're like Iguess in the new year I'll chill
(16:49):
, you know, when people leavetheir dog poo on my lawn and
this happens almost Daily atthis point and it's so annoying
because I already pick up mydogs every single day.
Okay, because that's whatyou're supposed to do.
I don't also want to pick upyours, and it's fun and exciting
every time.
Sometimes it's small, sometimesit's big, and we have a camera
on our porch.
So I've tried to catch them,but I keep missing them.
(17:09):
And then, even if I do what I'mgonna do, go figure out which
house they live in and knock onthe door.
I'm like, hey, I've studied thefootage, I know what you're
doing.
Knock it.
Okay, maybe some people woulddo that.
I'm scared, I'm too scared.
I'm just gonna complain about ithere to you, on things that bug
you know, and also, I encourageyou, let me know things that
have been bugging you, because Iwant this to be a place where,
yeah, they might not be thebiggest deal, but they're still
(17:29):
your problems, you know.
With all this said, I'm blessedthat these are my problems.
None of them are serious, noneof them are coming for anybody.
I will end on a happy note.
Just drop some things I lovereal quick a bidet, harper
snuggles, rain hitting a surfaceWhether that be a roof, a
window, my face Overcast stays.
A good hair day, a complimentfrom a stranger, a hug from
(17:50):
someone I love, a candle, ablanket and a good movie, oh,
and a snack.
So, yeah, I'm just gonna endthere.
This has been things that bug.
Number 9, 9, 9.
I hope you enjoyed.
Okay, so we thought the episodewas over, but nope, I'm coming
in with the surprise.
I'm dropping a new song.
(18:11):
This is an old poem I wroteturned into a song, and I wasn't
originally gonna ever share iton the podcast because it's a
little bit Super vulnerable andI feel like sometimes I already
put enough of myself out thereand I just don't want anyone to
Make fun of me, but also fuckthem if they do.
If I can't even myself here,what am I doing?
So this is called song for you,written about an old flame in
(18:34):
another time, and if you're onthe email list, you'll have the
lyrics.
Enjoy You're.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
You want me so much it hurts away.
You're making me question overthere.
When it comes to me, you'llalways be your curse.
You, your lips trace a littlecloser every run around me
(19:51):
saying we'd so turn.
Never felt like I was reallysafe here.
Please tell me where is myplace here?
I'm bleeding.
You don't even see me alwaysfighting, no coming ground
between Between, fell silentwhen I said I love you.
Ten years later you say youmeant me to the Love you again.
(20:24):
I don't know why you couldn'teven be a friend, cry here, lie
there, say good, nothings in theair.
Do you remember that night?
(20:48):
I've never felt more alive.
Your hand, I want you so much.
I know I'm more than you do.
Sir, when it comes to you,always you can resist.
My First.
(21:09):
You want me so much it hurts.
No one, the best girl you findon this earth.
And it comes to me, you'llalways feel cursed.
I'm so glad I learned how tolove me again.
(21:31):
It's not good and it's not bad,but it is truly the end.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
So yeah, it's no secret, I'm not the best singer
in the world, but I write frommy heart, I put myself out there
and I'm doing me.
So, yeah, next week we have ontwo more friends that you
haven't met yet that we go ondouble dates with, so it's gonna
be four people and stew and somuch fun.
Plus lots of good stuff leftthis season some best of
(22:08):
episodes and other surpriseguests.
I'm not gonna drop yet sostraight soon.
Now let's get into your cup ofTee-hee-hee.
(22:49):
Follow my podcast wherever youlisten to them, wherever that be
Apple Podcasts, spotifywherever you listen to them.
Like and follow me on Facebook,instagram, tiktok and YouTube
right in the review on Facebook,apple Podcasts and Spotify.
Join my email list by going tomy website or reaching out to me
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My website iswwwheyroanditstiffbusbrowcom.
Share this show with yourfriends.
Let them know about it.
Let's take over the world.
Go viral.
(23:10):
If you will, merch, let me knowif you want any.
They make great gifts for thisholiday season and these shirts
last forever.
I'm wearing one right now thatI've had for years.
Support a small business thisyear.
Why not Merch, merch, merch,merch All in my highlight reel
on Instagram.
Submit your questions for thenext Get to Know Me episode.
There will be one more for theend of this season.
So drop them in.
Drop them in.
A couple people have recently.
I appreciate you, I love you,thank you and finally, subscribe
(23:32):
to my show by becoming a MerMer she Know DJ Selfish, doot,
doot.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
I really appreciate you.
Then you came in and you tookit a step further, something you
didn't have to do.
You spoke to my podcast and itmeans so much to me.
(24:26):
Mer Mer she Know.
Some of my favorite people justhelping me live my dream.
Mer Mer she Know.
Mer Mer she Know.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
I love you.
So when you become Mer she Know, you're saying hey, thanks for
the show.
I appreciate everything you doand I'm going to give you a
little monetary tip once a month.
Love it, thank you so much.
You can cancel it anytime.
There's no commitment.
The link to join is in my emailshow notes and on my website,
(25:11):
and you can set the dollaramount to anything you want to
be.
So shout out to my Mer sheKnow's.
I love you all and I hope thatyou feel good being a part of
this community.
A lot of you are even coming upon one year very soon, in a few
months.
That's huge, that's crazy, andthe fact that my podcast even
has this kind of support in thisway is a big, big deal.
So thank you to my Mer she Know.
Shout out Gabe, victor, gabby,alana, marie, rachel, holly,
(25:35):
airelyn.
If you want to join, let meknow.
Alright, folks, we're back,we're moving.
Have a good week.
Next week's going to be fun.
We're having tacos andmargaritas before we record, so
who knows what will happen?
Bye.
Hey everyone, it's Tiff and welcome back from the
Thanksgiving break.
I know that I didn't let youknow that I would be doing that
until that email went out acouple days before, and that's
because I had no idea.
(00:22):
So I genuinely appreciate yourpatience with me.
I had every intention ofdropping an episode last week
and then I listened to my body.
I paid attention to howoverwhelmed I was.
I realized that this is my showand I have to do what works for
me.
I'm a one-woman system here andI needed to step away from all
of it, from working on thepodcast, from looking at my
social media, from everything.
(00:42):
And I do feel a lot better.
And so, while I don't want tomake breaks a habit, I know when
they're needed and I reallyappreciate you, baron, with me.
With that said, I hope thateveryone had a good week and is
excited for December.
I am someone who has both of mytrees up ready.
I have a little mini one in myoffice and I have the one
downstairs.
Some people are highly againstthis and are like December 1st
(01:03):
robust.
I don't give a shit.
I think everyone should do whatthey want to do and stop giving
a shit when anyone else does.
I guess that'll be my firstthing.
That bugs today is people whoare like you have your tree up.
Yeah, I do what's it to you.
It's my house.
Do what you want in yours, Idon't give a shit.
With that said, this is thingsthat bug number nine.
We're gonna get sassy, it'llstill be classy.
I have a lot of things to sayBefore I jump into it.
(01:24):
I did have a couple people askif I would be making ornaments
this year like I did last year.
The answer is no.
Due to bandwidth, I have noextra time to bust those out.
So if you purchased one lastyear, you have a collector's
item.
You may even have a one of akind kind of piece.
So cherish it, love it, cherishit, get it.
No pun intended, cherish it.
I'm sorry.
Hopefully I'll be back nextyear, but I just cannot.
(01:45):
I cannot.
But I hope that everyone enjoysthis Hollywood season.
Hollywood Holy day, oh my God.
Okay, let's officially startthis episode.
This is a hot segment.
We've been moving, we've beengrooving for a while.
Think it's time.
Things that bug number nine.
(02:06):
It's time for things that bug.
If you recall that was the newsegment sound that Gabe gave me
(02:36):
shit for having a solo during.
He's like I don't know if itneeds a solo and I was like it
definitely does.
But here we are, things thatbug.
The first one is when someonewants to pull up a video to show
me.
I literally don't care whateverit is.
It's my nightmare to beinvolved in a conversation with
someone and it starts going thedirection of have you seen that
Tik Tok?
Or have you seen that videowhere?
And they go, oh, let me pull itup.
Cringe.
Butthole is in my stomach Idon't want to see.
(02:58):
At best send it to me for later.
But even that I don't reallywant, like, if I missed it, I
missed it, you know, tell meabout it.
But honestly, tea and shade myhusband is the worst offender.
People taking their shoes andsocks off on the plane Are you
kidding me?
The fact that I even have tosay this?
Why aren't you disgusted like Iam and I mean in terms of the
germs A, b people might have tosmell that C there's nothing you
(03:21):
can really do.
I mean, I'm not someone who'sgoing to say shit, and so I just
think it's rude to put everyoneelse around you in that
situation.
It's just like people eat hardboiled eggs on planes.
People clip their nails onplanes Like what are we doing?
folks?
I never want to see your toes,ever.
If you're a stranger and I knowthat I go see toes out from
strangers all the time but we'realready too close on the plane.
(03:41):
It already smells weird.
I start thinking of your feetsweating hair.
I don't know, it's too much.
Put your fucking shoes on,absolutely not.
But I'm also not gonna riskgoing to crazy town on this
plane by saying something thisone's kind of petty, but it's
fucking true.
When your friends never likeyour photos on Instagram but
they like every influencer, theyfollow those photos.
I'm like, oh, you give a shitwhat Kim Kardashian is doing,
(04:03):
but you can't be out heresupporting my podcast, like what
the fuck?
People you don't even know hispictures, but not your friends.
If it comes up in my algorithmand you're my friend, I'm really
trying to like it.
I just don't understand andthat's petty and I'm sorry and I
know that people have the rightto like whatever the hell they
want, but this is things thatbug the place where we air
things that are dumb butannoying.
Also on social media.
It bugs that my platform can'tbe private because I want more
(04:27):
and more listeners to find me,etc.
But there are people out thereable to look at my profile, but
I'm not able to see theirs, myhaters, my creepers If you are
gonna look at my shit, I shouldbe able to look at your shit.
Or people who leave meancomments and then they're
private.
It's like half the guts, man.
I like things to go both ways,but I don't get to control this
one either.
Next, walking into spider webs.
(04:47):
Is there anything worse?
Okay, there's a lot worse, butit's so unexpected Like I think
immediately a spider is in myhair or trapped in my clothes
and it's having babies or it'sbiting me and it's gonna live in
my ears.
I saw a tiktok the other day, awoman showing that a spider had
crawled in her ear While shewas sleeping and it was there
for like three days and then itcame out at the doctor and it
was like crawling on the floorand I literally bought earplugs
(05:09):
and have been sleeping with thembecause I'm paranoid now that
that's gonna happen.
So, anyway, there's this spotin our backyard where this
spider keeps making this web andI keep taking it down because
I'm like this can't be your home, like this is the major walkway
, like I can't do this with youevery day.
It keeps bringing it back and Ijust I don't know.
It really bums me out and itscares me, and I know they're
just trying to survive on thisPlanet too.
So I'm sorry to you, mr Spider,for messing with your house.
(05:32):
I get why you would hate me.
For sure.
People who are always busierthan you flex in their busyness
just every time you talk to them.
They're like how are you doing?
And I'm like all right, no,yeah, I'm fucking busy, I'm
crazy busy.
But I stay busy night and day,like there is no stop to this
grinding, and I'm like didn'tyou just ask how I'm doing?
There's talking and thenthere's weird competing and
there's people who just thriveoff of being busy and having
(05:53):
everyone around them know thatthey're busy.
It's like if you need thistrophy, you can have it.
Ordering a drink from the bar oh, I hate it.
Like a crowded bar, you have tolike squeeze in there, try to
make eye contact.
You do?
They seem to be ignoring you.
You're like okay, great, nowwhat do I do?
It's not even their fault.
They're just busy too.
I'm not a pushy person.
I don't like to squeeze intocrevices.
(06:13):
I would much rather be sittingat a socially appropriately
distanced table from otherpeople and a waiter comes up and
asks hey, what do you want?
This is why I make reservationseverywhere I go, because I
don't want to be in thatposition.
And if we are in that position,I'll just send Gabe up and be
like I'll stand over here.
I can't even enter thatmonstrosity of a mosh pit.
Plus the power dynamic in myhead between me and the
(06:35):
bartender.
It's just too much.
I'll be over here or I'll go toa different place that has no
line, even if it's trash.
And then, if they do come up toyou, you tell them and they're
like what?
You're like I'm out of control.
They're like what?
And it's like oh my god, we'regonna have to make out for you
to hear what I'm saying.
Let's just skip it.
Let's just skip it.
Let's not forget that I was abartender and I also hated it.
From the other side too.
I didn't enjoy it.
(06:57):
That's just me.
This is one I don't think I'veever said, and I do think it's
very common.
But when people rev theirengines out in public, you're
just sitting on a bench Enjoyingthe breeze on your face and all
of a sudden it's like, and it'slike okay, why did we all need
to know you're there, you'redriving, I see you.
Hi, hello, I don't want to beskirt.
Okay, there's no reason forthat, unless you're in.
(07:19):
What is it called?
The one that they're all racingf1, unless you're a Jeff Fox
worthy or whoever used to race,which is NASCAR, I think.
Go home and quietly Editingtiff.
Here I definitely meant JeffGordon.
Okay, back to the show.
Oh, this one I've definitelysaid, but needs to be said for
the fucking people in the backdogs off leash when they're not
in their own house or backyard.
(07:40):
Okay, I'm not even gonna getstarted because I'm already
getting heated.
Another thing that bugs Tedlasso.
I said it, I said it.
I didn't like it, and the factthat everyone hates that I
didn't like it bugs me even more.
Okay, different strokes,different folks.
My husband loves it.
I can't stand it.
Sue me Fucking, sue me hecklers.
I go to a lot of comedy showsand they think this is their
(08:01):
moment.
They're time to shine.
Nobody wants it.
Come for the show or bust.
If you want to be up here withthe mic, do the work.
It takes.
Okay, littering.
Are we still doing this?
We are, knock it off.
We know how bad it is andpeople just still continue to
not give a lick.
There's just trash everywhereon this earth.
So much trash.
Shame on you if you're stilldropping it around.
(08:22):
This is a really niche one.
But me being so anal aboutgetting my Christmas and holiday
shopping done early that Imissed amazing Black Friday
deals on the same things Ibought anyway and paid double
the price on many, many itemsJust because I didn't think
about it couldn't wait.
This happens to me every singleyear.
Yeah, don't that.
(08:42):
I don't that.
I'm damn.
Morning breath.
We all have it, but it's gross.
Personally, strangers you know.
When you're like walking throughjust a Starbucks and it's
morning time and like everyone'sin there, it's that smell in
the air before 10 am.
That's just people's breathaccumulated together in one big
cloud and it smells like coffeeand farts and root beer and like
(09:05):
wet moss in a forest and Ithink they might have already
brushed their teeth Like that'sthe tea and it still smells like
that.
And I'm not trying to be rude,I swear I'm not gonna say
anything to any of these people,it's just something I've
noticed.
Lackluster burritos Can we justagree?
They're sad when they're smalland there's not much in them.
Like you're excited for a fat,juicy burrito and it comes and
(09:25):
it's just like flopping to theside, it's like dripping out.
There's nothing really in it.
It's like, hmm, what a bummer.
Whenever you find yourself in asituation where people are
genuinely arguing in front ofyou, it's another one of those
things that we maybe have alldone, but it's so awkward and no
one knows what to do and itdefinitely makes everyone around
you uncomfortable.
There's like casual bickering,classic things that we all do as
(09:47):
humans.
But then there's like seriousstuff that you realize you
should not be a part of anddon't want to be and shouldn't
be exposed to, you know.
So I don't know though Maybethat's a personal thing in like
how much conflict you wereexposed to as a child and stuff.
Times like you're coping skillsin bandwidth I don't know, I
don't know what I'm sayingEating at any point without
access to a napkin or a sink towash your hands, like literally,
(10:09):
if I don't have one of thosethings, I don't know if I even
want to eat.
Okay, that's traumatic.
That's not true but you know,when you're eating something,
you're really enjoying it.
And then you realize, oh, myhands are a little dirty.
And you're looking aroundYou're like, oh my God, there's
no access to anything.
How did this happen?
The only thing you're going touse is your fingers licky, licky
, or your pants wipey, wipey,but then you're sticky, icky
(10:29):
when people come at me hot and,honestly, when I come at people
hot, it greatly disappoints mewhen I do it, because I know how
painful it is.
Just give me the benefit of thedoubt.
Let's talk like humans.
I don't like it.
It all leads to me shuttingdown and feeling unsafe, but I
will feel very protective ofmyself too, and that's some
inner child shit.
Trolls this is an interestingtake that I was thinking about
(10:50):
the other day.
I don't know if anyone's seenthe escaping twin flames
documentary, but after I watchedit I understood the urge to
want to troll someone.
Like I found the leaders ofthis cult's Instagram and I was
like I'm going to write them andI'm going to say mean stuff.
And I stopped myself and I'mlike what, what is the point to
hurt them?
Yes, okay, we're not going todo that.
It actually doesn't do anything.
(11:12):
It ultimately won't fixanything.
It won't make me feel better.
There are other ways to standwith the cause, against them or
to disagree with them, but thisis the difference Someone who
doesn't have that moment, thatpause where they go.
Oh wait, I get that.
I'm having these big feelingsand wanting to do something
because I'm feeling hurt or hurtthat other people are getting
(11:33):
hurt, but the answer is not hurtpeople hurting people.
And so the other day, when Igot the little baby urge to
troll, I was like, oh my God,like this is how it happens and
it's interesting to think about.
And I feel bad because back inthe day I remember I did troll
Selena Gomez.
I made a mean comment on one ofher Instagram posts and her
fans fucking came for me and Iwas like arguing back and forth
(11:54):
with them.
And I think about that now andI'm like God, that's so
embarrassing, like why, who thefuck did I think I was, I was
jealous of her, I was wantingher to feel bad.
So what?
I could feel better about beingmy shitty self, glad for growth
, I'm glad for awareness, andit's just another reminder that
there are people hurting fuckingeverywhere, and when they get
behind their little phones andscreens.
(12:15):
They think they're brave, butit's not brave to attack someone
online.
An unexpected musical number ina movie.
If I didn't sign up for amusical, I don't want to be in
for the surprise of a lifetimeAbsolutely not.
People might find thissurprising.
Not a big musical guy, not atall.
When people get mad thatthey're not invited to something
, I'm guilty of it too, but Ihave to check myself.
(12:35):
I don't want everyone ateverything, so why would they?
People are allowed to do whatthey do, folks.
That is the theme, the threadthat is carrying us through to
the end.
Let people do what they want todo, because they have their
reasons and it's not personal.
Just people doing the dishesand then leaving the sink gross
with like extra food left over.
It's not drained or disposed.
There's just kind of a stankgoing around like please just
(12:57):
wrap it up, just take the extrafew seconds to clean that,
because it does snowball so fastinto a swamp.
And who needs that?
A pillow fight I've never likeda pillow fight.
They kind of hurt people, getcrazy.
And why would anyone like theirhead being smacked?
You know I've always wonderedhow that's fun or sexy.
You know people almost pin itas this, like hot things that
(13:18):
girls do at sleepovers.
We weren't doing that.
We were talking about how toshave our legs and if you've
used a tampon yet, okay, thisnext one that bugs, I'm gonna
get vulnerable with you all.
It's something on my body and Idon't need you to be like tough
.
Tough, no, not that, never, Isee it, I know, okay.
I just hate that I have like aturkey gobble.
My chin isn't a distinct chinor jaw line.
(13:42):
That's all.
Editing Tiff here I apparentlymeant a turkey waddle, not a
gobble.
Makes a lot of sense when Ithink about it.
Okay, bye Running into peopleunexpectedly that you know out
and about.
I hate that.
It only happens when I go hometo my hometown.
But there's nothing worse thanyou're just looking through an
office and they go, oh my God,and you're like, fuck, who is it
(14:02):
gonna be?
Never someone you want to see,ever.
And now it's starting to happenwhere I live and I'm like, oh
no, I've been here too long.
Gotta get out, gotta get moving.
I'm like a vampire.
They're starting to tell thatI'm 19 for the fifth year in the
row.
Does anyone else, if you know?
You know this one is anotherpetty one, but it's the truth.
People not listening to mypodcast A, I think more people
(14:22):
should, but B it's when they sayto me like I haven't listened
but I should, and it's like justsay nothing In my head.
You listen when you're a guestto an event and you have a
friend who's also a guest.
They're not hosting, they'rejust a guest and you guys are
both going to this and they askyou for gift ideas.
Now, bitch, work harder.
I did it.
I figured out what to get thisperson you figure out.
Now you can't come on my card.
(14:43):
First of all, they usually havea registry and, second of all,
you don't know them well enoughto know a single thing they'd
like.
Why is your problem now on myplate?
Do I help my husband bypresence for other people?
Sure, but do I want to do itfor everyone in my life?
No, also, you're not going totake credit for my fire idea
(15:04):
that I put thought into.
Absolutely not.
That's when you say no.
Is anyone else noticing that myvoice?
When I get super irritatedabout something, I go, I go high
.
I don't like that.
Next, I delete my texts.
I do that because I like toknow a conversation is done.
It stresses me out to have themthere.
I have everything started fromzero by the end of the day, even
(15:24):
with my husband.
I just delete them, I move onand sometimes when I tell people
about this they're like you'rehiding something.
I'm not.
It's the reason I just said andI have no insecurity about it,
and I don't know why you doeither.
With that said, it's sadbecause I can't go back to
things and I won't be able towhen people pass away and things
like that, but also becauseeveryone has free will and just
(15:44):
like I'm allowed to delete them,people are allowed to save them
.
This means I'm sometimes behindthe curve.
Other people in my life thatdon't delete their texts can go
back and read all these thingswe've said and remember
idiosyncrasies of things that Idon't.
I don't even know.
Tiff five minutes ago, who isshe, what she said, I don't know
.
And I've moved on.
I don't want to resonate thereand read old things, and maybe
(16:07):
that's wrong, but I hate in thatway that someone has like a
cheat code book that I don'tanymore and might remember me in
a way that isn't even me.
Yet I chose to throw this cheatcode away, because do we even
need the cheat codes?
What am I talking about Next?
Pimples, zits, whatever you callthem on the upper lip or like
(16:29):
right where the nose hole is.
You know, those are so painful,can we all agree?
And they bug because they'reembarrassing.
It's hard to cover them.
They refuel.
Yeah, crazy how packed theschedule gets at the holidays
every time, no matter how muchyou try to avoid it.
It's just like a thing andanother thing.
Another thing you're like Iguess in the new year I'll chill
(16:49):
, you know, when people leavetheir dog poo on my lawn and
this happens almost Daily atthis point and it's so annoying
because I already pick up mydogs every single day.
Okay, because that's whatyou're supposed to do.
I don't also want to pick upyours, and it's fun and exciting
every time.
Sometimes it's small, sometimesit's big, and we have a camera
on our porch.
So I've tried to catch them,but I keep missing them.
(17:09):
And then, even if I do what I'mgonna do, go figure out which
house they live in and knock onthe door.
I'm like, hey, I've studied thefootage, I know what you're
doing.
Knock it.
Okay, maybe some people woulddo that.
I'm scared, I'm too scared.
I'm just gonna complain about ithere to you, on things that bug
you know, and also, I encourageyou, let me know things that
have been bugging you, because Iwant this to be a place where,
yeah, they might not be thebiggest deal, but they're still
(17:29):
your problems, you know.
With all this said, I'm blessedthat these are my problems.
None of them are serious, noneof them are coming for anybody.
I will end on a happy note.
Just drop some things I lovereal quick a bidet, harper
snuggles, rain hitting a surfaceWhether that be a roof, a
window, my face Overcast stays.
A good hair day, a complimentfrom a stranger, a hug from
(17:50):
someone I love, a candle, ablanket and a good movie, oh,
and a snack.
So, yeah, I'm just gonna endthere.
This has been things that bug.
Number 9, 9, 9.
I hope you enjoyed.
Okay, so we thought the episodewas over, but nope, I'm coming
in with the surprise.
I'm dropping a new song.
(18:11):
This is an old poem I wroteturned into a song, and I wasn't
originally gonna ever share iton the podcast because it's a
little bit Super vulnerable andI feel like sometimes I already
put enough of myself out thereand I just don't want anyone to
Make fun of me, but also fuckthem if they do.
If I can't even myself here,what am I doing?
So this is called song for you,written about an old flame in
(18:34):
another time, and if you're onthe email list, you'll have the
lyrics.
Enjoy You're.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
You want me so much it hurts away.
You're making me question overthere.
When it comes to me, you'llalways be your curse.
You, your lips trace a littlecloser every run around me
(19:51):
saying we'd so turn.
Never felt like I was reallysafe here.
Please tell me where is myplace here?
I'm bleeding.
You don't even see me alwaysfighting, no coming ground
between Between, fell silentwhen I said I love you.
Ten years later you say youmeant me to the Love you again.
(20:24):
I don't know why you couldn'teven be a friend, cry here, lie
there, say good, nothings in theair.
Do you remember that night?
(20:48):
I've never felt more alive.
Your hand, I want you so much.
I know I'm more than you do.
Sir, when it comes to you,always you can resist.
My First.
(21:09):
You want me so much it hurts.
No one, the best girl you findon this earth.
And it comes to me, you'llalways feel cursed.
I'm so glad I learned how tolove me again.
(21:31):
It's not good and it's not bad,but it is truly the end.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
So yeah, it's no secret, I'm not the best singer
in the world, but I write frommy heart, I put myself out there
and I'm doing me.
So, yeah, next week we have ontwo more friends that you
haven't met yet that we go ondouble dates with, so it's gonna
be four people and stew and somuch fun.
Plus lots of good stuff leftthis season some best of
(22:08):
episodes and other surpriseguests.
I'm not gonna drop yet sostraight soon.
Now let's get into your cup ofTee-hee-hee.
(22:49):
Follow my podcast wherever youlisten to them, wherever that be
Apple Podcasts, spotifywherever you listen to them.
Like and follow me on Facebook,instagram, tiktok and YouTube
right in the review on Facebook,apple Podcasts and Spotify.
Join my email list by going tomy website or reaching out to me
directly.
My website iswwwheyroanditstiffbusbrowcom.
Share this show with yourfriends.
Let them know about it.
Let's take over the world.
Go viral.
(23:10):
If you will, merch, let me knowif you want any.
They make great gifts for thisholiday season and these shirts
last forever.
I'm wearing one right now thatI've had for years.
Support a small business thisyear.
Why not Merch, merch, merch,merch All in my highlight reel
on Instagram.
Submit your questions for thenext Get to Know Me episode.
There will be one more for theend of this season.
So drop them in.
Drop them in.
A couple people have recently.
I appreciate you, I love you,thank you and finally, subscribe
(23:32):
to my show by becoming a MerMer she Know DJ Selfish, doot,
doot.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
I really appreciate you.
Then you came in and you tookit a step further, something you
didn't have to do.
You spoke to my podcast and itmeans so much to me.
(24:26):
Mer Mer she Know.
Some of my favorite people justhelping me live my dream.
Mer Mer she Know.
Mer Mer she Know.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
I love you.
So when you become Mer she Know, you're saying hey, thanks for
the show.
I appreciate everything you doand I'm going to give you a
little monetary tip once a month.
Love it, thank you so much.
You can cancel it anytime.
There's no commitment.
The link to join is in my emailshow notes and on my website,
(25:11):
and you can set the dollaramount to anything you want to
be.
So shout out to my Mer sheKnow's.
I love you all and I hope thatyou feel good being a part of
this community.
A lot of you are even coming upon one year very soon, in a few
months.
That's huge, that's crazy, andthe fact that my podcast even
has this kind of support in thisway is a big, big deal.
So thank you to my Mer she Know.
Shout out Gabe, victor, gabby,alana, marie, rachel, holly,
(25:35):
airelyn.
If you want to join, let meknow.
Alright, folks, we're back,we're moving.
Have a good week.
Next week's going to be fun.
We're having tacos andmargaritas before we record, so
who knows what will happen?
Bye.
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