Life is a Space Opera, So Simp for Jessica (Dune II): Episode #76

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Prepare your palate for a sensory symphony, as we blend the rich notes of "Dune 2" analysis with the bold flavors of a whiskey tasting in this latest podcast episode. James Crossland joins me to dissect the latest cinematic adaptation, where Timothy Chalamet's performance and the film's world-building captivate as much as the whiskey warms. 

This episode is a landscape of contrasts as we celebrate the stunning cinematography of "Dune 2," while Rebecca Ferguson's portrayal of Lady Jessica steals the spotlight. We traverse the challenges of adapting such complex source material and delve into the strategic thinking of movie studios when expanding beloved franchises. From exploring the parallels between today's AI and the Dune universe's technophobia to comparing the sound and visuals with Zack Snyder's horrific "Rebel Moon," we offer a hearty critique with the help of our Missouri and Middleton guests to enhance the conversation.

As we conclude our journey through this episode, the future of the "Dune" series sparkles on the horizon. We speculate on the narrative's potential to mirror the longevity and evolution of the Star Wars saga, while envisioning a catastrophic Marvel-like expansion. The return of beloved characters, the influence of 'God Emperor of Dune,' and the growth of Frank Herbert as a writer—all are up for discussion. With a joint in hand and spirited dialogue, this episode promises an exploration as intoxicating as the beverages we're savoring.

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Episode Transcript

Ryan (00:01):
Oh, the new Fallout thing for Prime.
It looked kind of cool.

James (00:05):
It looks good.
Walter Goggins is one of thekeys, the person from the past
who turns into a ghoul.
He's like the salesman for thevault.

Ryan (00:16):
Yeah, I do want to check it out.
I do.
I feel like it might actuallybe able to pull it off.

James (00:22):
They had the Mr Handy who says he's gonna, I just want to
take your organs.
It's like, oh yeah, theycapture.

Ryan (00:31):
They fucking nailed that yeah, no, I do want to check it
out.
I've been, I've been looking atthat.
Maybe we'll do uh.
We'll do a bit on if we manageto choke down the series, we'll
do uh an episode on fallout itsaid that they're releasing it
all at once, so it's a good.

James (00:46):
I mean it's yeah, probably do it pretty quickly
after, if we, if we like it yeah, hey, no, I'm down, I'm down.

Ryan (00:54):
All right, well, let's get into this.
So, hey, everybody, welcome tohigh and dry podcast, the only
podcast keeping alive the fandomof star wars, now that it's
being it's dead and being shovedinto the grave.
Where the podcast is going tokeep it alive?
Uh, kylo ren specifically.
You know, we thought he wasgoing somewhere and then just

(01:15):
didn't.

James (01:16):
Uh, we're here making sure that he's the love star
wars that's right, folks.

Ryan (01:22):
The final star wars podcast.
Uh, thank you all for joiningus with me, as always, james
crossland, james seriously makesome big billions of dollars in
every movie but nobody likes ityou weren't expecting that one

(01:43):
were you.
I went, I uh, I had to think ofour dead fandom bit I'm doing
fine.

James (01:50):
Yeah, I wasn't expecting that one doing fine.
I uh.
It keeps raining in san diegoso I haven't gotten to do my
hobby in a while, which blows.
I'm trying to convince you toget into fishing there, because
it's all you're.
You're out in the woods, you'reout in nature.
I want to be able to when wehang out next, I want to be able
to sit next to you and we youknow catching fillet fish and

(02:14):
shit and cook it right, right,wherever we are, because that
sounds dope that would be prettycool.

Ryan (02:20):
That'd be pretty cool.
Um, I would like some of youguys to come on down here um
june time frame, ish.
I think that'd be pretty sweet,but uh you know if that
absolutely, if that comes topass, we'll, uh, we'll go, uh,
go fishing yeah, are you?

James (02:36):
have you done much fishing in the past?

Ryan (02:38):
I did very, very briefly when I was a child.
But, uh, you know, our fathertaught us and it turned into
like that, uh, the wholesituation where the sun looking
under.
But uh, you know, our, ourfather taught us and it turned
into like that, uh, the wholesituation where the son looking
under the hood of the car, youknow, and it just turns into him
getting pissed.

James (02:52):
Yeah, yeah, my stepdad.
My stepdad taught me to fish,and that was one of the one good
things he did for me.

Ryan (03:01):
Well, well, we'll, uh, we'll, pick it back up in June,
Umune, um.
So hey, for those of you, justjoin us for the first time.
We're high and dry podcast.
Today we're going to be talkingabout dune 2 just came out got a
lot, a lot to say about, uh,timothy charlemagne and we'll uh
, we'll see if you guys agree.
Um, but yeah, we're gonna.
We're gonna break it down,we're gonna throw down our sober

(03:24):
thoughts, we're gonna throwdown our golden path thoughts
and then we're gonna do somewhat ifs of dune?
And what's gonna make it so funand exciting is that we're
gonna do it drunk and high so,james, oh no, I wasn't prepared
to be high today.

James (03:38):
No, oh god I forgot the format fuck, fuck.

Ryan (03:43):
Well, what are you smoking today?
I'm completely unawares.

James (03:48):
Today I've got prepared sitting next to me, just
randomly right, not on purpose.

Ryan (03:53):
I've got cereal milk, I think that cereal milk is a good
one.
You've had that a few times,yeah.

James (03:59):
Yeah, I think it's a really good philosopher's weed.
There's a few weeds out therethat have the, the right
terpenes and that when theycombine they just kind of like
open your mind, like like somekind of spice or melange, some
melange.

Ryan (04:16):
The spice melange Said said very little in the second
movie.

James (04:22):
Yeah, didn't get a melange.

Ryan (04:28):
No melange, no, no melange .
Well, I'll be joining you onthe drunken golden path.
Today I brought an old Forester.

James (04:36):
It's special.

Ryan (04:36):
It's Prohibition style 1920.

James (04:41):
So mean and a still in the backyard.

Ryan (04:44):
That's right, this guy right here.
He's 115 horsepower.
Normally I'm rolling in high80s, low 90s.
We're shooting up today forDune 2 in the 115 horsepower.
Let's see here Anything specialI should know about this one.

(05:06):
There is nothing better in themarket is what it says so saith
the bottle.

James (05:13):
This is a 57.5 alcohol by volume so it's also taking the
1920s uh advertisement laws andstyles into account, where you
can just say you're the best ofsomething, correct, it was made
in like a state park.

(05:33):
It's a still in a state park.

Ryan (05:38):
It's prohibition style, it would be.
Well, that's how they're ableto say what they want, because
they actually went out and didit.
They did it prohibhibitionstyle.
It was made in a fucking still.
They did it right Behind achicken coop, guarded by some
nutjob with a shotgun His mom,his mom, while he was out

(06:00):
wearing his suit.
And I'll be taking that down inmy mountain glassware, the
mountain collection.
Nice, let's see how it goes.
So this one, our first toast,simple as as written.

James (06:16):
As written.

Ryan (06:18):
As written.

James (06:18):
Lisa, now I've got ye.
Oh, no my lighter's not working.
Oh no, all right, I'll be beback.
I'll take two on the next onekeep going all right oh, I said
to keep going.
Well, I mean, what was I gonna?

Ryan (06:33):
say you know like we're conversational based, so I'll
just unpause it.

James (06:38):
We'll just go ahead and take your puff come on.
Oh yeah, that's good.

Ryan (06:46):
That's that cereal milk I was looking for yeah, no, I uh
not gonna lie to you.
That, uh, that was incredible,was it really?
That was really good damn.

James (06:59):
Usually you don't have, as you don't have a good review
like that right out of the gateyou don't have, as you don't
have a good review like thatright out of the gate.

Ryan (07:07):
Now, that was fantastic.
That was super smooth.
It has the bite that you'dexpect out of 115 horsepower.
Um, but that was just fine.
That's great, man.
I'm glad to hear it.
Yeah, let's see how the secondone goes here.
Um, so this second one, thetoast, is and I'm we do this
every fucking time, but I'mstill, I'm never ready for our

(07:31):
second toast.
But our second toast goes outto our newest listeners, who
listened to our total recallepisode.
Ooh, that's a good one.
Yes, and that'll be from.
That's interesting, a lot ofmissouri coming up, but, uh,
we're not going to do it to them.
Uh, I hate missouri.
Here's to who but notmissourians necessarily

(07:54):
necessarily here is tomiddletown connecticut,
middletown connecticut ournewest listeners, who shouldn't
be in any way affiliated withanyone I have met in Missouri.

James (08:08):
Let us know if it's Middletown or Middleton or one
of your crazy New Englandpronunciations.
We'll get them right, maybe.

Ryan (08:18):
Maybe Leave yeah, after you like and subscribe.
Leave some in the comments.
Here we go.
So here's to Middletown.
Cheers, cheers, middletonleton.
So what am I getting off ofthat second one?

James (08:28):
it's actually pronounced middle tune my middle town, that
second one.

Ryan (08:38):
So I'm getting getting the caramelly notes, I think on the
back end of that one.
That's where you know yourbourbon eventually tastes like a
backwash out of a ashtray.

James (08:53):
Does this taste like backwash out of an ashtray?

Ryan (08:57):
No, no, something strange.
Wait, oh, it's missing, youwish?

James (09:02):
you had the backwash out of an ashtray yeah well, I mean,
so you're supposed to sipbourbon?

Ryan (09:09):
as any bourbon person will tell you.
But doing this show I wind upfucking ripping a lot of bourbon
.

James (09:16):
Well, how about on?
Oh sorry, go ahead.

Ryan (09:18):
Well, it's usually when I do that second one where you get
, just because I'm chugging itdown, you just get that ashtray
backwash taste.
Not this time, not this time.
That's that's interesting.
Old Forrester, that'sinteresting.

James (09:34):
How about?
How about?
On this one you take half ashot and then sip the rest of it
.

Ryan (09:40):
It's really because it is like it is extra proof right, it
is like Well, I'm reading here.
So during prohibition oldforrester was bottled as
medicinal whiskey under thekentucky permit number three.

James (09:55):
So that's uh, good old kentucky good old kentucky.

Ryan (10:00):
So here let's, uh, let's get that third one down.
What do you want this third oneto be to?

James (10:06):
This third one is to I don't know.
The floor at the Las Vegashouse finally got repaired.
So this one is to your mom andbrothers.
They have a floor to walk on.

Ryan (10:18):
They have a floor to walk on.
As written.
Cheers as written.
As written.
Cheers as written.
Man at 115 horsepower, man,this is gonna, this is gonna hit
me like a sledgehammer to thefucking jaw yeah there's no
fucking way, it won't, and sohow about?

(10:39):
Well, I, of course, wasdrinking during doom, but
because I'm not in vegas anymore, I had to sneak in my alcohol
like an animal.
Oh my God.

James (10:49):
You should go first on sober thoughts.

Ryan (10:55):
All right.
So my initial sober thoughtsthen, in the quickly diminishing
window I have thecinematography was it was
fantastic.
Cinematography was fantasticOut of this world.
Rebecca Ferguson Absolutely Afucking revelation.

(11:16):
And yeah.

James (11:19):
Well, we already knew that she was great.
Oh, she's amazing.

Ryan (11:22):
She is amazing.
Yes, I would Kill any fourpeople I know for her.
All she needs is but to askyeah, she was excellent at Dr
Sleep.
Dr Sleep, she was amazing asthe hat.
But yeah, yeah, sober thoughts,amazing cinematography.
A little long, a little long.

(11:42):
I had to.
I had to pee like four timesduring that fucking movie well,
to be fair, the book Dune isincredibly long, very long and I
noticed in this second one.
So in the first one they justsliced everything off and I hate
that and you could see whatthey were doing in the second

(12:05):
one, because they put in a bunchof extra stuff that they didn't
do in the first one and thefirst one was just dip in a toe
test in the waters, like can wemake money off of this?
And then once they're like, allright, we can make money off of
this, let's add a little bitmore of the stuff.

James (12:20):
Yeah, and we can make it crazy now that it's been tested
for marketability.
We got people hooked.

Ryan (12:28):
Yes, yeah, and that's kind of sad, that's kind of sad,
right, but that's the, that'swhat we're entering into, and I
think I can go down a rabbithole of AI taking over art while
humans will be left to do thedrudgery, but I feel that's a
golden path, thought, yeahthat's true.
It's something that the Duneworld doesn't have conveniently

(12:53):
which is very interesting,conveniently and on purpose, if
you've read the books they hadAI.

James (13:01):
Yeah, there's a reason that it doesn't exist.

Ryan (13:03):
Yes, yeah, there's a reason that it doesn't exist.
Yes, and there was a very largesocial upheaval, revolution,
and AI and computer technologyand all that kind of fun stuff
was totally outlawed.
So we'll see how I mean it.
Vegas odds it's 50 50.
And Herbert may have just beena perverted bastard or a future

(13:27):
seeing genius.

James (13:27):
So he can be both a perverted bastard and a future
seeing genius at the same time.
I guess we'll see.

Ryan (13:38):
I'm excited to fight AI.
We'll see how it plays out.
You know as written.
Well, James.

James (13:48):
Which has different connotations now.
But back when Frank Herbertwrote the book jihad wasn't
blowing up the two towers, youknow the twin towers.
It was just.
You know, it was your questright.
It was a wave of change.

Ryan (14:07):
Yes, yeah, so that's more of an aligned thought also.
Yes, well, uh, so what?
What are your, uh, what areyour sober thoughts on the film?

James (14:12):
sober thoughts.
Like you said, cinematographyis great.
Uh, I think it's reallyimportant to distinguish, like
graphics and cinematography.
When we talk about how greatthe cinematography is in this,
it's not just graphics and it'snot just how beautiful it is.
You know, all the shots alsoconvey like like size, like the

(14:33):
with the, with the worms.
Uh, you know the way I I lovethe scene near the end, uh,
where they actually attack, youknow, the emperor of the city.
They, they come in with thesandworms and what they do is
they take an out shot which islike, okay, here's the specs of
people and the worms coming in,and then they go to like a long

(14:54):
shot and the worms are bustingtoward the camera and you've got
the small people in the frontand like the blurs of people in
the foreground and, uh, I thinkthey did an awesome job with
conveying the size and scope ofthe worms and this fight that
happened, where these worms takeout like whole platoons of
people yeah, no without a doubt.

Ryan (15:16):
And do you recall the very early on, uh, the scene where
you had the harkonnen troopsjust sort of floating up the
side?

James (15:26):
of the ridge.
That was really dope.
Even that was, yeah, it wassilently, it was silently and it
was so cool.

Ryan (15:34):
It was very cool, it was haunting the way it was shot.
Yeah, it was haunting.
It evoked so much, so much wasgoing on there and yeah, so the
cinematography was.
Yes, it was gorgeous, and Iwould willingly watch the film
again in a in a larger formatscreen.

James (15:55):
That's what I said to you before the before you went was
I was like I'm going to go seethis in IMAX when I can.
I'm going to go to the best,the best IMAX screen I can go to
see, with the best audio.
Well, cause, the audio isawesome too.

Ryan (16:09):
Yeah, the audio was incredible.
The music was used superblythere.
There's definitely pieces ofthis that were masterwork.
Um, but while while we're stillin the sober thoughts, how does
it compare to you, James,against the epic?

(16:30):
That was Zack Snyder's latestfilm.

James (16:36):
Oh, Rebel Moon, Rebel Moon correct.
The masterpiece that's RebelMoon.
The masterpiece, themasterpiece that's rebel moon.
Uh, I think this really goes toshow you know what audiences
liked about this film anddisliked about rebel moon.
Because they're very the scaleof the worlds and the ships and
stuff is very comparable inrebel moon to this.

(16:59):
Like that's what they wanted,was like that.
Actually, rebel moon goes evenfarther with like travels from
planet to planet that we neveractually see the travel.
Actually, rebel moon goes evenfarther with like travels from
planet to planet that we neveractually see the travel or rebel
moon was off doing this whilethe interesting shit was over
here.
And that's what we, you know.
That's really interestingbecause if people go back and
listen to our rebel moon episode, what I talked about was that

(17:19):
they failed to do any kind oflike character we, they didn't
do any.
They didn't take any effort tomake us give a shit about the
characters.
People people are always comingand going, but it wasn't in
relation to anything, it wasjust people coming and going and
, and in dune we got peoplecoming and going all the time.

(17:41):
Right it dune did the exactsame thing, but it did it so
much better because it wasimportant to what was currently
happening.
It wasn't it wasn't just.
It wasn't just a bunch of littlevignettes that were shoved
together.
That's what it was.
That's all it was.

Ryan (18:00):
That's all it was.
So.
So, for those of you who arejoining us for the first time, I
know we're starting to see newpeople coming in from Missouri
and from fucking Middleton,middleton, come on, middleton.
I know we're starting to seesome new people coming in and if
you haven't, we hated ZackSnyder's the Rebel Moon.

(18:23):
That was bad.
It was a bad movie.
I was really happy to get onemore at him.

James (18:29):
Yeah fuck that guy.
Yeah, fuck that guy.
This movie had a cohesive ideaabout what it wanted to present
to you.
Yes, in a cinematic way, withthe cinematography, with the
cinematography, with the music,with the story.
All those things work togetherinstead of, instead of being, I

(18:51):
assume, worked on by totallydifferent sections of Zack
Snyder's fucking AI.

Ryan (18:57):
It was done they didn't even talk to each other and then
the robot goes off and he'sgonna have a sweet fucking movie
, but anyway, and then that's anemail to the sound designer and
they're like fucking what?
Um, but I will say this soberthought is dune, had the roadmap

(19:19):
worked out.
You know, zach snyder not agenius trying to do his own
thing, yeah, herbert pervertedgenius, but still a genius had
already written the roadmap andall that was required was
beautiful cinematography and amasterful sound piece, and I

(19:41):
don't know.
I don't know if I agree withthat okay, well, good, well, how
, how about we dive into thenext portion of this and let's
really fucking bite into thisthing?
Let's do it, yeah.
So let's jump onto the goldenpath and let's get at it.
Cheers.

James (19:58):
Cheers.
Oh yeah, I have to imbibe more,okay.

Ryan (20:03):
God damn that Prohibition, old forester, holy shit, that
uh vengeance man.
Oh, and I love it.
It's fantastic, god damn that'sgreat, that's, that's wild.
so, uh yeah, for those of youlistening, uh, old foresterster
1920, this bitch is going tocost you about 60 bucks though,

(20:25):
so it's definitely a weekendpour, but you're in for a great
time.
It's got great flavor, greatbite and shit it's 115.
So, all right, everyone,welcome to the second portion of
this.
We have now attained the goldenpath, which the term was

(20:50):
greatly lacking from this secondfilm, in my opinion.
But we're on the golden pathnow.
Read the fucking book, james.
What are your enlightenedthoughts?

James (21:07):
well, the conversation we had leading into this was kind
of like you know what?
This was, a story that wasalready written and it and they
followed all the same beats andstuff and all that had to be
added with cinematography.
You know that that's a fair.
That's a fair look at it sayingyou know, zach snyder had to
come up with this whole thing onhis own.
This is an adaptation, but itdid take steps that were
different from the way thingswere relayed in the book, that

(21:30):
brought it into modern times,that looked at the story through
a lens that audiences wanted.
Right, because frank herbert inhis writing you know, not
really caring much for chani'spoint of view, let's be honest
and in this movie, uh, somethingthat I didn't come up with,

(21:50):
this thought I heard it on adifferent podcast because I
could, I had to consume a bunchof media.

Ryan (21:56):
Well, it sounds like you're well, it sounds like
you're already on the way to.
So I.
So, folks listening, I havejust come out of the theater and
you're starting to talk.
From what it sounds like you'reabout to start talking how
chani.
So, folks listening, I havejust come out of the theater and
you're starting to talk.
From what it sounds like you'reabout to start talking how
Chani is the one who breaks awayfrom Herbert's work.
Yes, and that's all my notes.

(22:16):
Is the difference in Chani?

James (22:19):
Yeah, chani in this one was definitely represented more
as a full, a fully fleshed outcharacter, first off with her
own opinions beyond theconcubine.
Yes, and in the end she's likeshe's meant to be, the the

(22:40):
audience, right, she's thecharacter that's meant to
represent the audience's pointof view.
And when Paul decides, you know, she's the character that's
meant to represent theaudience's point of view.
And when Paul decides, at theend, when Paul decides that he's
going to marry Irulan, weessentially and we side with her
Our thought is like oh damn,putting Chani, just this power

(23:00):
struggle between Paul and thegreat houses, but that's what

(23:24):
I'm saying about them movingaway from it.
We also introduced the whitesavior concept, which Paul, I'm
sorry, which Herbert was not,frank Herbert was not concerned
about.

Ryan (23:35):
Not at all.
And one of the questions so I'mlooking through my notes here
as the guy who snuck not onlyliquor but notes into this
theater.
The question I had asked herewithin my notes was God damn it,
where'd it go?
Yeah, sorry, sorry, yeah.
Is this a white savior movie?

(23:55):
So yeah, sorry, sir.
Yeah, is this a white saviormovie, or have we?
Become too preoccupied as asociety on the race of a
character.

James (24:11):
Oh well, this is Well.
I think this movie definitelycall it.
It brings it into question.
I mean, I'm sorry it brings itto the forefront of our minds
purposely, brings it intoquestion.
What I mean I'm sorry it bringsit to the forefront of our
minds purposely when paul goeswell in my studies, I heard it
is that he literally is likelike that's when she told, when
she shows him how to sandwalk,when chani shows paul, how to
sandwalk yeah, that scene wherehe goes well, in my studies it

(24:34):
was you it said we were supposedto do this and she, like, looks
at him like I've been doingthis my whole fucking life.
Like what do you insist?

Ryan (24:41):
But in that scene he concedes he does concede, and
that's the that's.

James (24:45):
The point is that we're supposed to look at it and say,
ok, paul's making progress andchanging, but but where we take
a turn is later in the movie,and I actually think it's better
.
And I actually think it'sbetter.
I think that Denis Villeneuvedid a great job with this,
making it clear to the audiencein this movie, finally, that
Paul is not a good guy, eventhough in some of the reviews

(25:08):
I've read they still go.
The good guys won and the badguys lost.
It's like what the fuck man?
How could you even come?

Ryan (25:16):
to that conclusion.
I'm also glad you brought thatup, because when you were
talking about Chani walking off,she is supposed like we.
So this was where I saw ourmodern sensibilities taking a
direct turn from what waswritten by Herbert in that, you
know, chani's now her owncharacter.

(25:37):
She's her own thoughts, and notonly that.
She's representing whatani'snow her own character.
She's her own thoughts, and notonly that.
She's representing what youshould be thinking about.
This.
This is creepy, right?
Um, this is weird.
Uh, this is dangerous, butespecially.
You know, we talked about itway at the beginning, before we
even talked about star wars.
I'm in a different uh region.
I'm in a different region ofthe United States right now,

(25:59):
temporarily.
I have now met many people wholook at Chani as foolish, and
that's very prevalent in myopinion now, sadly a very
prevalent thought.
What I think the audiences aregoing to see this, and this
touches on something that wetalk about frequently that we

(26:21):
are not responsible enough formedia yeah, because I felt it
was incredibly clear that paulis not a good guy at the end of
this.

James (26:29):
It's frustrating that someone comes out of the theater
with a different conclusion.
But no, the good guys did notwin paul.
Paul decided to take power.
He was doing great when he wasPaul.
Paul decided to take power.
He was doing great when he waslike I'm not going to take power
.

Ryan (26:44):
We were all like he wasn't even doing that in the book.
Like he wasn't even doing it inthe book, it was just straight
to takes it and Johnny's like.
Well, he had to do it.

James (26:54):
Yeah, she was making excuses for him and and he's,
and that she was making excusesfor him, and that's what I'm
saying about.
You know, it's not just anadaptation, it's been.
He's clearly in touch with theeverybody who worked on this
movie was clearly in touch withwhat audiences wanted and the
struggles that, as we wouldperceive them now if Frank

(27:19):
Herbert was to write this booktoday.
Right, it's a, it's aperspective that is not
presented in the book and it'sinserted into this adaptation
and people love it.
Well, audiences fucking love it.

Ryan (27:33):
Audience buckle up because Jason Momoa comes back and he
addicts a woman to his dick.
But uh he may.

James (27:41):
He makes, makes someone come when he climbs the ladder.

Ryan (27:47):
A woman who's clearly sapphic in the telling of it.
So something I had wrote herewas that they altered Chani to
balance the situation to modernsensibilities.
But I ask, was that unnecessary?
Because if they follow throughwith the story, Paul becomes a

(28:09):
soothsayer who dies in a fuckinggutter, Right.
But like that's that, that's awild place for, I think, modern
sensibilities or modern moviemaking, to take a hero.
I think I think they needed thisto build up to that, because
it's another it's a whole notherfilm, right, it's a whole

(28:29):
nother story watching paul justbecome this fucking regretful
hooded soothsayer in themarketplace who eventually dies
in the fucking gutter.

James (28:47):
um, I'm wondering if you can do that.
I think they're gonna do that.
I think that's what they'resetting up.
Is that paul doesn't give ashit about the people around him
?
Really, he, he now is ambitious.
He now takes his ambition andhe's like I'm the only person
who can see the path forward,it's my responsibility, and then

(29:07):
we're going to see him crushedby taking that on and focusing
on only those things that'ssomething that a lot of us can
relate to now.
I think it may be.
I think what they're workingwith is directly an allegory of
ambition and work going intoMessiah right, because his work
takes him over.
It totally preoccupies his time.
He doesn't have any connectionto his wife or his concubine

(29:36):
that he's keeping, who wasactually humanized in this movie
.
The humanization would comelater in the series if we were
waiting a whole nother movie.
But it's hard to care aboutchani if we don't humanize her.
Uh, people didn't really careabout her in the first movie, if
I remember, but now sheactually turned into a character
and I'm I'm digging it.

(29:56):
I love Chani in this, in thisversion of this adaptation.

Ryan (30:00):
Yes, and so I'm.
I'm wondering.
So I mean, in in the novels, ifwe're going to follow Herbert,
something has to happen thatmakes Chani come back.
I mean, we, we watched the endof this film and she's getting
ready to ride off on a worm andshe's like fuck this shit.

(30:20):
I'm not about to be a concubine, I'm not about to worship this
guy and like, I'm willing totake fucking bets on what
Hollywood's going to do here.
I mean, are they going tofollow through?
Is she going to come back andbe the concubine?
Because if they do that, I meanthey have to essentially,

(30:41):
george RR Martin, the end ofthis shit.

James (30:44):
because you know they're moving into uncharted territory.
So I think what happens issomething that is very human and

(31:07):
something that I thinkaudiences will also connect to
is that Paul is going to be kindof manipulative After he took
the water of life.
You can look back and say didtaking the water of life change
him, or is he now just who hewas the whole time?
Is it just releasing?
Was he manipulative the wholetime?
He talked to her about beingequals?
Does this, did this just changehis view?
Is he, does he somehow have alarger game that he was, you

(31:30):
know, disrespectful to hispartner in this one time?
A lot of audiences can relateto that either the one who's
disrespectful to their partner,or being disrespected and still
coming back and trying tosalvage a relationship and
trying to find that person thatyou knew before, or something
like that.
I think that I think that thiscould definitely be.

(31:52):
Chani will make mistakes.
Obviously she's going to make amistake being with paul, but we
really thought that in the, inthe other version too.

Ryan (32:01):
Right, yeah, and so well but they're building up to it
now.
Well, I'm interested to seewhat happens here.
What's what's sad about this?
Um, from what I'm seeing hereis that we have a second film
that is taking the work anddoing these things with like

(32:22):
Chani and what we're talkingabout here.
But no matter what they do,it's going to be tarnished by
the first Dune.
They did that was clearly.
It's sliced off like fuckingeverything just to make a
marketable film, and that, to me, rings as supremely depressing,

(32:46):
just because that film will nowalways tarnish.
What's happening now.

James (32:52):
It'll be less than yeah.
And the fact that it was a partone of a story.
It's not a full story bydefinition.
Fact that it was a part one ofa story, it's not a full story
by definition.
It's like almost entirely it is.
It is entirely act one of a ofa longer movie that that's
always going to be a problem.
It was never a complete movieand I hate that about part ones
is they're never complete movies.

(33:13):
I I have a feeling that rebelmoon part two is not going to
blow my mind, but really yougathered that, but just by
making it a part one, it wasalready an inferior film.
They they really shotthemselves in the foot by doing
that.
She's been a limited series orsomething.
Um but um, where was I goingwith this?

(33:35):
Yeah, part one's always gonnasuck.
What I do see happening, though,is by chopping a lot of the
background out of part one, wedon't bog ourselves down.
It makes it more accessible.
It's long, right, it actuallydraws out the, the first act,
longer, because it's giving youless information, but it's but
it like with the visuals and theand the audio and stuff.

(33:56):
What they were trying to do atthe first movie was introduce
audiences to a to the scope ofthe world, and I.
What they were trying to do atthe first movie was introduce
audiences to a to the scope ofthe world, and I think they did
a really good job in that, inthat fact.
But again, it's an inferiormovie.
It doesn't you have to watchboth.
It can't stand on its ownDefinitely.

Ryan (34:11):
Yeah, dune, one does not stand on its own, without a
doubt, and that's just.
There's just.
That's very depressing to me.

James (34:22):
Don't let it depress you.
It's like watch them togetherTogether.
It's a great story.

Ryan (34:28):
Well, now I can, but it's been two years now where I had
to just hang out, and also evenin the second one, for a very
small instant they had madeBaron Harkonnen as brutal and
vicious as he was in the book.
But then, in this effort tomake fade more than just fucking

(34:50):
, you know, staying gettingstung, yeah, and they.
He was completely outclassed,which I also feel was sort of a
mistake.
They, they.
By putting all this effort intothat fucking baby looking guy,
they made the baron himself lookpathetic and, yeah, I, I feel

(35:11):
that may have been a mistakeyeah, the baron.

James (35:15):
the baron, when you think about the character as a whole
and the arc of his story, ispathetic.
Everything he does is reallypathetic.
He expressed his brutality andhis madness were symptoms of him
being pathetic.
Yeah, of course I said thiswhen we talked about the Lynch

(35:37):
version.
I think the Baron Harkonnenthat they had in the Lynch
version was way better.
Like that Baron was fuckingchewing on the scenery.

Ryan (35:44):
I still remember it was so good.
It was so good, oh yeah, no.
And the scene with the Baron.
Like I mean, we're talkingabout a 1980 film here with, you
know, pre-star Trek, fuckingPicard.
I had to look away when thatBaron was being nasty, yeah, so

(36:05):
I feel that honestly, I thinkthat the Baron is probably the
biggest failure of the currentfranchise.

James (36:15):
Yeah.

Ryan (36:16):
They should have given the role to.

James (36:18):
I've said this before they should have given the role
I've said this before theyshould have given the role to a
big fat guy.
You don't, if you're not a bigfat guy, if they have to put you
in a big fat suit, you don'tunderstand.
Every big fat, every big fatguy has listen.
Every big fat guy has a mindsetwhere he understands, like what

(36:39):
it is to be, like gluttonouslyconsumptive and you hear that
colin farrell doing the penguinin the new fucking hbo series
you don't know.
You don't know what it's like tobe a big, fat guy, and it's
true, the way for herbert wroteit was like it was excesses and

(36:59):
it was like depravity, where he,he eats.
He eats more than he needs toand he knows it and he's
depraved about it and thatdepravity has spread into other
things and stone stars.
Doesn't know what it's like tobe a very rotund, gluttonous man
and it sucks.

(37:22):
Looking at media where and thissounds like I'm going- to joke
about it.
Where the big fat guy is not.
Yeah, it's like big fat guyface, it's blubber face and I
don't like it.
We don't like blubber face.
One movie I really like isTucker and Dale versus Evil,
because they have just a big guy, a guy who's fat in it and they

(37:45):
barely mention it and he's justlike.
They just treat him like aregular person.
Yeah, he's just the guy, it'sfucking awesome, yeah, and, and
a big fact I was able to do feel.

Ryan (37:55):
But yeah, just bringing it back around, I feel that the
baron is this series greatestfailure.
Yeah, and they did it becausethere's some connotations.
You know, if you read thenovels you know the baron was,
you know they're we're talkinghomosexual pedophilia and things

(38:17):
of that nature and that's.
That's a very scary thing totouch on.
Cannibalism they didn't showthe cannibalism.
Yeah, those are scary things totouch on.

James (38:27):
He would fuck little boys to death and eat them Like he
was not a, he was like a monster, and I think that I I saw in
reviews that some people thoughtthat the Baron was too silly.
Now, which I can't imagine whatthey think if, if he actually
did the shit he did in the novel.

Ryan (38:47):
Exactly.
I understand that it'sespecially because we were
talking about that first filmwas just putting the dip in the
toe in the fucking hot tub ofthe money, seeing if there's a
bite, and that that would be afucking hard sell.
I understand, but because theydidn't do those things, there

(39:10):
was that initial.
So you have that initialcomparison between Lato II and
Harkonnen Because they refusedto go into those things.
It was just two fucking richguys and we're only following
this one fucking rich guybecause he's the star Right when
in the novel it was definitelylike, hey, both these dudes are

(39:31):
a bunch of fucking rich assholes, we should be eating them.
But this one right here, thisguy right here, he fucking eats
people.
They're pretty bad, yeah, andwe definitely.

James (39:42):
They're like bad even for the thing.

Ryan (39:45):
Yeah, for the thing we're talking about, that dude is bad
and we completely missed that inthis particular iteration.
And I feel like that's afailing.
I feel that's a fail.

James (39:58):
Yeah, I agree, I feel that's a fail.
Yeah, I agree, I couldn't agreemore.
I the thing is, I still lovethe movie.
I didn't even know they missedthat.
I, they still love it.
I still think that this moviewas excellent.
I, I, I will always wish thatboth.
That they had a Baron Harkonnenwho, who had like one of his

(40:19):
mint hats over him, going thedisease is being, is being what.
What did he say?
Oh shit, I can't remember thelynch version, but he was like
where the disease isconcentrating in you, it's
growing in you, sire, and he hadlike these boils, just like oh,
yes, I, I wanted that againyeah, I wanted I wanted that
again.
It was clownish, but it wasclownish in a way that was

(40:41):
unhinged.

Ryan (40:42):
Yeah, watching the Lynch version, I had to look away,
yeah, for when he was coming atthat one kid it was like shit
dude, and we missed that.
Yeah, and Alia.

James (40:57):
Where was Alia?
Alia was still a fetus fuck.
I wanted to one of the reviewsare like that.
He is the quits from the lynchversion.
I also thought alia in thelynch version was awesome.
I thought that was one of thebest parts.

(41:18):
He is the and then she stabshim with the ganja bar and he's
like that's what I wanted to see.

Ryan (41:25):
So yeah, for those of you who have not, uh, read the novel
, I guess shame on you.
But um, you're fucking imposers.

James (41:35):
But for those of you definitely not, it's one of the
densest pieces of it was a toughread, jesus.

Ryan (41:44):
So, with all that being said, I sort of started to
envision a situation here wheredune now because disney has
completely annihilated it, dunewill become the new Star Wars,
where that the level ofmainstream mixed with the nerd
dumb is able to overtake it.

James (42:05):
That's a possibility in any franchise, especially in the
modern day.
That's a possibility.
Is that it's going to bemodified into a cash grab, like
that's the fear of any sequel orwhatever?
Yeah, I hope not.
They did a really good job withthis one.
I enjoyed it into a cash grab,like that's the fear of any
sequel or whatever?
Yeah, I hope not.
They did a really good job withthis one.

Ryan (42:26):
I enjoyed it a lot.
Well, I mean, I hope that itdoes, I am so pissed off at Star
Wars.

James (42:34):
You're saying you hope that Dune Marvel is Marvelified.

Ryan (42:38):
Well no, not that it is marvelified, but I hope that
takes on this place where I mean, like so star wars started in
the 70s, finished in the 80s andwe didn't destroy it until 2000
.
I hope that dune was started inthe 2010s, finished in the
2020s and we don't destroy ittill the 2040s.

(42:59):
That'd be cool, that that's myhope, and meanwhile, disney is
just forced to sit there withthe billions of dollars they
paid lucas and just fucking suckit.

James (43:12):
That's I just hope.
I just want to see later thesecond learn about, about
sticking salmon to himself andflee, fleeing himself through
the sand, like, like swinging,like a swinging Spider-Man or an
Aquaman or some shit.

(43:33):
I want to see it Well you showme it.

Ryan (43:36):
Speaking of Aquaman, I just want to see a late 40
something.
Momoa be brought back into thisseries to make a girl come
while he's on the ladder.
That's what I want to see, umI'm down, we'll get.

James (43:54):
I mean, I hope they get there, they have.
They have to do the other thingfirst.
If you're going, if you'regoing in order, I guess, I guess
we could just see one moviecover all all three remaining
books, if they just take thelast concept and have, uh, have
later the second, like lookingback on on his life, which is
kind of what the, the, you knowgod, emperor of dune is.

Ryan (44:17):
Yeah, yeah well I'm gonna incorporate the other books into
that I'm interested to see.
Uh, and you know, and for thoseof you listening now, um, just
because this is a fresh film, alot of things coming out of this
.
It's it's very topical.
This will this will probably bea long episode, so if you want
to hang around, if you want to,don't I?

James (44:37):
know, whatever, hang around and listen, hang around,
listen you know we're getting'tknow.

Ryan (44:40):
hang around and listen.
Hang around, listen.
You know we're getting intosome wild shit here.
We haven't even gotten to whatif, but I definitely want to see
A man put on a giant worm suithave his own concubine.
The concubine becomes acharacter.
Well, and that's an interestingpoint there I'm glad I brought

(45:01):
that shit up.
Uh, yeah, I brought that shit uptoo, because in that book, uh,
there is a Chani, like a modernChani, yeah, the concubine who's
banging a worm man has a lot ofthoughts and eventually kills
the worm man.
Spoilers for a book that's beenout since for 40 years now.

(45:21):
Yeah, so like well that that'swild it was.
Was Herbert catching up beforehe got all pervy?

James (45:31):
Uh, what's going on here.
It's a good point.
I think that, uh, I think thathe probably did grow a little
over the course of writing thisuniverse and it's great that he
learned to humanize a characterlike that.
And she is humanized Probablynot as much as we'd like, right,

(45:54):
I'd still probably say there'smore humanization to be done.

Ryan (45:58):
Yeah, because in the in the book she still needed, uh,
jason momoa to show up right anduh, that may happen again.

James (46:06):
it's, it's okay to need help, but she's, as long as
she's like, characterized fullyand uh, yeah, they didn't do
that for chani.
And it is the parallels betweenwhat they wrote for chani and
what they wrote for, oh shit,what's her name?
Whatever her name is it had anS, yeah, since it's been to, I
never actually read the book, Ionly read, like you know,

(46:27):
synopsis is, and so I don'tremember, but there is a, there
is a personality and like,characterization, and, but, but
it is different.
It is different because theconcubine, like, lives under the
servitude of this, this worm,emperor, for her whole life,
which is different from Chaniwho, like, chose this path and

(46:48):
they got betrayed.
Yes, so it would, it would becool if Chani fucking killed
Paul.

Ryan (47:00):
I don't think it's going to happen, but that would be
that'd be dope if Chani killedPaul, that'd be I.

James (47:02):
I doubt that's gonna happen that'd be a dope change
to the story if that, if shekilled him in the gutter yeah,
that'd be really weird.

Ryan (47:11):
Hmm, interesting, well, uh also.
I just pulled it up real fast,just so we can say it yeah, yeah
, so later the second was killedby a lasgun by the assistant,
nala Nala Nala, and they fell totheir deaths in the Idaho River

(47:32):
.

James (47:33):
Of course, named after Duncan Idaho, because he loves
him some Duncan Idaho.

Ryan (47:43):
Yes, in idaho, because he loves him some.
Duncan idaho, yes, and laterthe second was also uh, there's
a mini-series that hits sci-fi,and he was portrayed by james
mcavoy before x-men so yeahchildren of dune.

James (47:51):
The children of dune mini-series, yeah, which I'd
love.
I'd love to see and I don'tthink they went as far as they
could in that children of dminiseries.
I want to see it like, likethis was done, but I want to see
children of doom.

Ryan (48:03):
That would be fucking wild that will be because, because
there's times there, what, um,so you have?
Well, it's twins.
So later the second and theother little girl's name there's
twins, and I think it startswith an e I'll look it up
there's a portion of the novelwhere there it's, these two kids

(48:27):
essentially becoming fuckingsuperheroes by attaching baby
worms to themselves.
Yeah, and that's a wild moviein of itself yes it.

James (48:40):
We already talked about how they weren't willing to go
wild enough at these movies.
I really hope they startgetting wild, cause the next
movie, the next movie, has somekind of wild stuff in it.
Like they're going to enter,introduce the Tlaxi I think
that's their name.

Ryan (48:53):
And they're Tlaxu.

James (48:55):
Tlaxu.
Yes, it's hard.
It's a hard thing to say, tlaxu.
And they're laxu and they're,and, and they're like cloning
tanks which is something thatthey didn't introduce in this
one, and we also didn't see manymintats, and so they're going
to introduce like a lot moreshit, and how it actually

(49:18):
interplays in like game ofthrones style politics while
also a holy war is going on.

Ryan (49:25):
No, that'll be, that'll be interesting, I mean.
Well, so I guess they'vealready stated that they want
this to be a trilogy and thatwill require especially with the
way they've taken Chani,that'll require a lot of
alterations to the originalstory.

(49:46):
And you know, I'm wondering ifthey're going to bring Chani one
way.
I also have a this sort of fear, I guess, because we had the
first film.
They obviously put it out justto like hey, can we make money
off of this?
And then you have zendayaplaying chani, but then on the

(50:09):
other side of it you haveflorence playing the empress,
and I'm wondering if it'll sortof become a competition of
popularity over the next twoyears on which way they take the
story.

James (50:24):
That would suck, I don't know.
They did a really good job withthis and so I don't know if I
don't want to give them, I don'twant to take away the goodwill
they've earned in this film frommaking it very touching and
very relevant and taking it in adirection that I feel, as a

(50:44):
viewer, makes logical sense andactually makes it a little
clearer than herbert's work,which is it's.
It sucks that people are stillmissing it, but I think it makes
it clearer yeah, no, and that'ssad.

Ryan (50:59):
And you know like we've beaten the fucking dead horse.
You know people aren't matureenough.
Us half monkeys.
As human beings, we're notready for media like this.

James (51:12):
Well, the characters in this movie are monkeys, you know
that's.
The thing is that they're allhalf monkeys too.
They're all humans and they'reall making mistakes.
And I have a feeling in thenext movie, chani is going to
make a mistake.
And continue to be with Paul,because sometimes, you know, our
emotions get the better of usand we make mistakes because

(51:35):
we're people.

Ryan (51:36):
And we're not aware of the genocides that we're causing.

James (51:40):
She might even be aware.
You know you can't say thatPaul didn't finally give Arrakis
to the Fremen.

Ryan (51:52):
He did the Fremen control Dune.
Now, well, and I think that's awonderful statement on it does
not matter who it is the colorof their skin, their creed.
Statement on it does not matterwho it is the color of their
skin, their creed, anything likethat.
Once you give a human beingpower, it corrupts.

(52:13):
Yeah, and that's just a sadfact of life.

James (52:20):
But I also think without being sad, even if they're
saying all the right things.
Even if they believe all theright things.
Yeah, even if they're sayingall the right things, even if
they believe all the rightthings.

Ryan (52:27):
Yes, and this is a complex mess, you know, and I think
that's why it didn't catch on asmuch as Star Wars did, because
Star Wars is just so clearlyblack and white, and bad and
evil, or good and evil, and Ithink that was what was always
catching it up.
But I think now we haveaudiences who want that

(52:50):
distinction, who will notnecessarily the distinction, but
who want the muddled area oh, Igotta I have a fun.

James (52:58):
I don't know what you, the end of your experience was
like in the theater.
What did anything happen?
Did anyone react after the,after the movie finished playing
, I mean?

Ryan (53:06):
one guy was masturbating furiously well with, with the
well, afterwards I took mydenisey popcorn bowl, the
special edition one, and I tookit into madam webb and I just
fucked the shit out of it therewas no one in the theater so I

(53:27):
was late.

James (53:27):
I was able.

Ryan (53:28):
Yeah, it was like it was made to do this, so I was really
thrilled with that.
I even wedged it in the twoseats in front of me and was
able just to go ham on it youturned around and we were
actually facing away from thescreen because it was such a bad
movie, terrible.
Absolutely terrible, oh God.

(53:51):
But yeah, what was I saying?
Oh yeah, so the reactionFucking soccer balls.

James (53:57):
So after the movie ended, someone tried to start clapping
, which was very funny.
I thought that was so funnythat someone started to go.

Ryan (54:07):
that's like, try it, he's just programmed to clap in a
fucking movie.
Yeah, and it was it was.

James (54:14):
It was very, very funny.
Uh because the rest of theaudience was like a full theater
.
Nobody else started clappingand that person just slowly just
stopped.
And uh because that's howyou're supposed to feel, yeah,
that's, that was someone who waslike, yay, good guy won, and
it's like no no, no, no, hedidn't didn't win.

(54:37):
Yeah, stillgar, as stillgar goesoff to fucking conquer the, the
universe, someone who was hisfriend and like, vouched for him
and was like, hey, you know, wehave a connection here, and
that's the thing is that paulhad no connection.
He entered into this cultureand had and, and saw resources

(55:00):
and used resources and he didn'thave that connection.
But the, the water of hisancestors, are not in the, the
siege to beer pool of life.
His ancestors are not there.
Their water isn't there.
He's never had to tocontemplate the mingling of of

(55:22):
life over a vast amount of timeand being in one place and
having one reason why things aredone.
He saw resources and he wentand used them to achieve his own
goal they called it.

Ryan (55:34):
So in the first movie they called it.
It was uh, desert power.
You know, you have air power.
Yeah, yeah, and that's, that'swhat he did that's what he did.

James (55:42):
He got desert power and and someone whose culture was a
specific way and poisoned by thebene?
Gesserit thousands of years ago.
You know someone who understoodthe good parts of his culture
that they developed, you know,uh trusted this guy and and he
exploited the parts of theculture that that he used to
manipulate them, that weren'teven theirs to begin with, that

(56:05):
were outside of their gatheredculture and placed by the bene?
Gesserit about a messiah.
So it just shows theexploitative nature of like, in
this case, a neoliberal.
You know who's like.
I have to do bad things to stopbad people, which is a very
neoliberal mindset, like a himcoming in and destroying an

(56:28):
indigenous culture that doesn'teven have capitalism.
They don't like, don't evenknow what it is.
You ever see anybody pay foranything?
Because things are just basedon need, because that's what you
have to do to survive, yeah,when the whole world's out to
kill you and take what you have.
I love the scene where stillgarwas like, even if we were, even

(56:51):
if we were, you know, oh shit,what's it?
What's the thing where you diebecause you don't have water,
dying of thirst, oh, even ifyou're, if you're, yeah, even if
you're dying of thirst, theywould not drink from this water
this is.
This is sacred water and and andpaul we kind of got
foreshadowed of that in thefirst movie with the sacred date

(57:13):
palms.
Or he said you know, why don'twe stop giving them water?
People need that.
He's like, no, this is a, thisis a promise, this is like a
legacy.
This is sacred because it looksat a future where dune could be
green.
Yeah, and paul doesn'tunderstand.
Even after it's told him hedoesn't understand.

Ryan (57:33):
Well, with that being said , people who were clapping at
the movie, not realizing the badguy, sort of won well, I mean
honestly, there's no such thingas a bad guy.
There's no such thing as a goodguy.

James (57:44):
Everything's boring no, there are bad guys.
No, these, there are all badguys.
No, but anybody who tells youbad guys don't exist, they're
full of shit, those guys are badalso true.

Ryan (57:56):
Uh well, so anyone who was just clapping in the movie
thinking that it was a good guyversus bad guy scenario no, for
this film you actually have tothink you.
You have to reason, you have touse your critical thinking.

James (58:07):
Sorry that's not how it went.
And you can come up with yourown opinions about it too, which
is kind of how the people inthe movie do it.

Ryan (58:15):
Right, yeah, we've left.
You know, disney led the way.
That was the whole purpose ofZack Snyder, disney.
They were there to show us that, hey, this shit we've been
watching it doesn't work thatway.
This is garbage.
The thing I made is garbage.
Life is much more complicatedthan simply good versus evil,

(58:39):
light versus dark.

James (58:41):
It's an opera, it's a space opera.

Ryan (58:49):
Life is a space opera.

James (58:49):
It is this life is a space opera, as is written.
As is written we'll finish.

Ryan (58:57):
the last little hit of this whoo, that prohibition
style whiskey is coming in hot,which is just in time because it
is time for our what ifscenario 1920s Prohibition
medicinal whiskey.

James (59:15):
Yeah.

Ryan (59:15):
Really coming in strong here, coming in clutch.
So the final portion of thisshow.
What if the hosts of High andDry have been cast into the
Dune-iverse to fuck that DanussiJames?
How does the space opera changeonce you get your hands on that

(59:39):
Danussi?

James (59:41):
Oh boy on that to no see, oh boy.
Well, so I we usually do thisin two parts where like what if
you were one of the characters?
Who would you be and how wouldyou react differently?
And then what if you were justthere?

Ryan (59:53):
uh, so let's, we're taking on a film that's still in
theaters.
Fucking run with it.

James (59:59):
I don't give a shit if this is a titanic length episode
so if I so, if I was one of thecharacters in dune, I'd be
baron harkin, and obviously andI'd, uh, I'd just be going wild.
No, no, I'm just kidding.
Of course I'd be johnnyobviously I'm joking.

Ryan (01:00:20):
That'd be a wild fucking thing, dude.
I'm just fucking timothychalamet or charlemagne or
chalamet chalamet chalamet uh,with his lack of ass, just
getting fucked by you and thenhe breaks your heart yeah, he'd
break my heart pretty bad.

James (01:00:41):
I would have killed.
I would have killed paul assoon as he as have killed Paul
as soon as he stood up and waslike I'm not going to listen to
your rules for leaders and stuff.
I don't give a shit about howyou did things before.
I would have, as Chani, juststabbed him right there.
I would have totally stabbedthe shit out of him.
Okay, but I'm also not Chani.

(01:01:03):
I was making a joke about meputting myself in the place of
an indigenous woman I watchedthat fucking movie.
Man, I would watch that movie Icould make the decisions of the
indigenous peoples better thanthey could, I would have.
I would have.

Ryan (01:01:21):
I would watch the movie where Paul.
Paul just has a gayrelationship yeah, fuck, this
hauls off, fucks a dude.
That dude stabs him to death,that's a wild film.
That's a Tarantino right there.
That's some Game of Thronesshit.
Yeah, that that's a wild film,yeah for sure.
Well, if I had to insert myselfas one of the characters, you

(01:01:45):
know, my uh, latent narcissismwould of course insert me as
paul and and then I guess I getwrapped up in my own head, shit
and um everything would justthen.

James (01:02:01):
Essentially it would just be the movie and you, just you
would just be.
You would just be Paul, andyou'd be like the whole movie
would play out exactly the same.
You'd be like that was fuckingdope.
I'm emperor now.

Ryan (01:02:16):
It's fucking dope let's have some shots, exactly how I
wanted it, and there, therewould just be a scene where
let's have some shots.
This is going exactly how Iwanted it, and there would just
be a scene where fucking Paulgrabs up all of his friends and
we're just ripping fireball,shirtless, with the boys.

James (01:02:35):
He's like all right, everybody, we got to party it up
tonight.
Tomorrow I go to bed withZendaya and Florence Pugh.

Ryan (01:02:43):
That's going to be a wild scene, bro.
No, no, but if so.
If it was actually me, though,it, the third movie would just
be emotional turmoil of being inlove with zendaya, but still
fucking uh, florence bue.
Eventually I just crumble in onmyself.

James (01:03:05):
That's going to be the next movie.
Like I said, this would just bePaul.

Ryan (01:03:10):
Well, I would crumble in on myself, and then me as a more
attractive Timothy Charlemagnewould hop up on a chair, wrap a
fucking wire around his throatand then kick out the chair.

James (01:03:24):
I think instead you'd blind yourself and then go
wander out into the desert.

Ryan (01:03:28):
That's how I think it would go yeah, and then there
would be that one weird dude inthe back of the theater who
tries to clap when it's over.

James (01:03:37):
It's gonna happen.
I can't wait until we watch thethird movie and that happens.
And then there's Bruce Lee.
Way to go, beautiful, go.

Ryan (01:03:46):
he killed it he fucking killed it from the scene, from
the scene where paul ryan baronnorth was fucking, ripping
fireball shirtless with the boys, to when he fucked both those
beautiful women, to when hispersonality crumbled in on
itself and then he killedhimself Just mwah, chef's kiss.

James (01:04:08):
Wow, the good guys win yeah.

Ryan (01:04:15):
Yeah, welcome me into Dune .
There it is.

James (01:04:24):
There you go.

Ryan (01:04:29):
I'd be there with you, I'd be Aly, and then I'm sure,
let's fucking.
We're taking shots going.
That's right, baby.
Yeah, no, it would be.
Uh, it'd be a wild film.
It'd be a wild film I, it'sjust me.

James (01:04:44):
It's just me, it's just me, with the same build and
everything but like three feettall, wow yeah that'd be a crazy
fucking flick, Definitely.

Ryan (01:05:00):
We could only make it happen because one and two were
blockbusters and then they justgive me the helm Like look, dude
, they're gonna.
We could only make it happenbecause one and two were
blockbusters yeah.
And then they just give me thehelm, Like look, they're going
to come see it because they sawone and two, Do you bro?

James (01:05:12):
So weird.
I hope it's so weird so theyhave an opportunity to be so
weird in this next one.
People love the Getty prime andpeople loved it.

Ryan (01:05:27):
Yeah, oh, yeah, it's, it's .
It would be weird.
Yeah, my, what if it would justbe fucking weird, without a
doubt, yeah, no, like people whosaw the second one, like wow, I
wasn't expecting paul to beshirtless ripping shots with the
boys, but there he is, oh, andthere he goes.
He's fucking.

(01:05:47):
He's trying to fuck them bothat once.

James (01:05:48):
Wow, didn't work out, but honestly, wow, they said no,
but okay he really uh, becausethat's essentially what happens
in the next movie.
It's very funny If you wereit's just a translation of of
what happened back then, like,of course he's on top of the
world, now he's the proclaimedemperor, and then it's his

(01:06:12):
descent as he he's.
This path that he's sworn towalk on has made him nothing but
sad.

Ryan (01:06:20):
Yeah, not, and, and I would, I would play it.
I would.
Yeah, no, and, and I would.
I would play it out, I would.
I would just fucking go ham onit.
I got my little psychic threefoot tall bitch.
I'm banging this one, I'mbanging that one.
They don't, oh, they don't wantme anymore.
That's fine, I'll just fuckingkeep ripping my old forest

(01:06:40):
prohibition style.
Well, you want me to?

James (01:06:44):
talk to my kids fuck that , fuck that.

Ryan (01:06:47):
Um yeah, oh yeah, and I would just fucking spiral.

James (01:06:52):
Dune three is depressing it's gonna be, no matter what
it's gonna be depressing.

Ryan (01:06:58):
There's gonna be cash and titties out everywhere, but holy
shit, it is sad.
It is sad, yeah, well, well,well, so so back to you, then.
We're always talking, like youknow, there's the two parts of
the what if.
Oh, what's your second part ofthe what if?
You know, if I was?

James (01:07:17):
inserted into dune.
Yeah, the only place I see formyself is uh is on the emperor's
ship, is I was one of.
I was one of the people thereand we're just like what's going
?
On out on on dune.

Ryan (01:07:34):
What the fuck is happening I guess we still have a job to
do right we have to go to gettyprime.

James (01:07:43):
That doesn't sound fun, fucking freaks there, solid,
solid yeah, I see, I see paulstab stab fade and I'm like, oh
no, the entire power structureis uprooted.
What's gonna happen to me?

Ryan (01:08:00):
I make two,000 a month.
What happens next?
No, I feel that, I feel thatyeah.
So for my, what if I also see ayeah, like if you just insert
me into it?

James (01:08:14):
I would just be.
I wouldn't survive in thedesert.
Would you be in the Fremen?

Ryan (01:08:19):
Well, so Like so, look, I've done the military thing.
I understand the training.
You know I'll train up whatever.
But then I would survive, butthen I would just be fucking
simping after Jessica.

James (01:08:36):
Yeah, and there would just be.
She loves simps, she lovespeople who follow her, then
that's what I would be.

Ryan (01:08:43):
I'd be like, yeah, that was, that was fucking awesome.
Ma'am, can we do that thingagain?
You called it the sloppy toppywith the reach around, and
that's that's all I'd be.
I would.
I would just be simping after.

James (01:08:58):
Uh, yeah, rebecca, rebecca ferguson the whole time,
and that's how the movie wouldchange you just being one of
like do you see yourself likeright now is stuck in the
southern part of the planetwhere it's like all these
religious fundamentalists andyou're just kind of stuck there.
And then ferguson rolls in.
You're like, hold on a secondsomething from the outside world

(01:09:19):
and she's hot.

Ryan (01:09:20):
Yeah, whoa, uh yeah, no, that would definitely be.
Yeah, so I would be in thesouthern part of the planet,
because, you know, here I am, Iwas born here.
I'm like wow, dude, what you'resaying is really fucking weird.
Um, and then a worm would comein one day and my life would be
turned upside down.

(01:09:42):
Yeah, like whoa, I just goodLord, I found meaning in all of
this.
Good Lord, and it is whatever'sgoing on with her.

James (01:09:56):
Yeah, and that's all that we fucking chance you just be
in the background of every shot,like carrying her her litter or
whatever.

Ryan (01:10:07):
But but then, but.
But I will say this, though Ithink there would be a butterfly
effect of change.
I think there'd be a butterflyeffect.
You make her happy.
What would happen.
What would happen is Jessica,who's like, completely satisfied
.

James (01:10:27):
Doesn't need to promote Paul to Holy.

Ryan (01:10:29):
War.
Exactly, she does not need tobring about this Holy War
because she just came eighttimes and she's just like
sitting there like she's liketrying to get her fucking
balance and you know she's gotlike assistance holding her
fucking balance and, um, youknow she's got like assistants
holding her up going.
What the hell's going on withour messiah here?

James (01:10:49):
and that would fit with frank herbert's style of
storytelling and writing.
Uh, and another thing that hewould certainly explore is that
she's pregnant with alia.
So they're like sharing,they're psychically sharing.
She's sharing her orgasms withher fetus and that's totally
something frank herbert wouldwrite about, because he's a

(01:11:10):
fucking pervert, yes, and and so.

Ryan (01:11:14):
so inserting me into dune too, we would see that final
scene right.
And uh, jessica would come out.
She's wearing the garb andshe's like she's being held up
by an assistant, you know,because her legs are fucking
wobbly and the only insertion ofmyself into this film is me

(01:11:34):
stepping out of the same room, alittle like worse for wear, I'm
like dabbing a cloth on myforehead and I'm wiping off my
mouth, and then Jessica's likeyou know what, paul, this, this
ain't worth it.

James (01:11:51):
If my son comes, don't let him drink the water of life.

Ryan (01:11:56):
I've changed my mind she's like, don't let him drink the
water.
And she just 180s about facesand walks back into her tent.
And then I'm like and then youjust see me look at the camera
with my hands on my hips going.

James (01:12:12):
Work's never finished and then it's a black screen and it
says and that's the end of themovie, and that's the end of the
movie.

Ryan (01:12:25):
And, yeah, dive back in.
Yeah, no, but like in the endI'd put on a snorkel and then
dive back into the tent and goin real camp for the final beat
audience, then the audience thatone guy just clapping his ass
off.
Yeah, that's how it wouldchange with me, for sure, for

(01:12:49):
sure.
Love it all, right.
So thank you everyone.
So much, so now it's time tocome to the final, final, final
portion of this.
So, james, you weren't able tobring a notebook into the
theater no, I wasn't, but I do Iwas yeah, you did, you were
able to.

James (01:13:06):
Did you want to go first or?

Ryan (01:13:08):
well, let me fire off what I didn't get to get off in uh
dune 2.
Um, so let's see here uh,shield tech forced the use of
swords and that was completelyforgotten so.

James (01:13:23):
So it's interesting you bring that up.
I do have something to sayabout that.
They do mention in the firstmovie that they don't use
shields in the desert because itdraws the worms.
They, they do say that.
So, so a lot of that shieldtech shit.
They did have shields atspecific times when they they
weren't out of the desert.
So I feel like that waspurposeful that no one had out

(01:13:44):
in the desert.
I feel like that was purposefulthat no one had shields in the
desert.

Ryan (01:13:47):
I will concede that, yes, I am busy making Rebecca happy,
so it is what it is.
So then I said I love thecommentary on the desire to
believe.
Yes, oh, yeah.

James (01:14:03):
The theater laughed when Stilgar gave his.
It gave his like oh see, hedenies it.
That means it's like you know.

Ryan (01:14:09):
That means it's even more of a sign that he's the messiah
yeah, yeah, but the theaterlaughed a lot of the yeah, but
it's like hey guys, that was afucking mirror and look into it,
motherfuckers.
And so then I also said chaniis the stillgar of paul's
sincerity in quotes.
You remember she had made thatstatement of he's sincere and

(01:14:34):
I'm like, well, that just makesyou the stillgar, but instead of
you know, quiz, a hot rock.
It's just of his sincerity.
Yeah, let's see.
Oh, then I put, she gonna showhim the way.
Dot dot dot.
All right, let's see.
With the success of the firstfilm, they made the Baron more

(01:14:54):
vicious, something they hadavoided before then.
Tim Charlemagne has no ass,true, in a lot of those scenes
where he's put in front of thesun and he's just a fucking
straight angle all right, I lovemy white boy jeans yes, they

(01:15:14):
chose not to explain the anatomyof the worm and how they kept
it above the sand.
I guess that's just extra nerdshit.
As written should be the newtoast.
Let's see here um paul made thealliance plan, not the baby in
the book.
Let's see here they forced usto like paul by turning against

(01:15:34):
the benny jeseret.
I love that.
Terrorists are the heroes inmainstream media.
Let's see here they went allout on Fade the Baron was
weakened by a humorist.
Fade let's see here.
They finally gave fuckingGurney Halleck an instrument.

James (01:15:54):
I hate that.

Ryan (01:15:56):
I hate that movies now have to test the waters with the
first film.
Here's just a note.
God damn, Rebecca.

James (01:16:03):
Yeah.

Ryan (01:16:04):
She was really great in that.
I liked, I liked the henna itwas very, she was also uh white
savory oh yeah, but chef's kiss,I, yeah again my insert me into
the film and I would just beperforming fellatio the entire
time.
Um, let's see here.
Oh yeah, love that one dudeholding the sword against the

(01:16:27):
worms, his optimism wasinspiring if you go back and
watch the scene where severalworms are rushing the emperor,
there's one dude who doesn't runand he's just holding a sword.
And yeah, his optimism wasinspiring.
Oh yeah, in hollywood, battlesare won by the most acrobatic

(01:16:51):
side I love how the new emperorlooks like a young christopher
walken that's pretty funny theykept the word that knocked out,
the benny jesuit woman.
If you remember, in the uh,original version, in the 80s
version of the dune film he waslike and benny jesuit woman was

(01:17:15):
knocked back.
Yes, they kept that, I loved it.
And then finally they alteredchani to ball.
But was that unnecessary?
Because Paul becomes asoothsayer who has his shit
wrecked in a gutter.
But we already talked aboutthat one.
So yeah, those were my machinegun notes taken in the film.

James (01:17:37):
My first note is I don't know if you remember how the
film opens.
Do you remember the openingshot?
I always think opening shotsare important.
The opening shot I wrote paulhas a huge face because it's
just like his face taking up theentire screen paul's huge face
large face, no ass uh, finally awhite savior.

(01:17:58):
Let's see, I wish they wouldhave had the paul stillgar worm
writing scene.
I really wish he was up therewith him smiling.

Ryan (01:18:13):
They're smiling back at each other yeah, not enough.
Sexual tension between paul andstillgar yeah, pretty lame uh.
I.
I really liked the worm writing.

James (01:18:19):
I I feel like, because they showed like little vents,
liked the worm writing.
I feel like, because theyshowed like little vents on the
worm, that essentially you, theway I perceived it was that they
open that up and so the wormdoesn't want those vents that
are open to be in the sand andso it has to keep them out of

(01:18:41):
the sand.
That's how I perceived it.

Ryan (01:18:46):
Yeah, but that's a lot to pick on for your average
audience member.
I would say the dude clappingat the end he definitely didn't
get I did.

James (01:18:52):
I liked it, though I'm glad they did that for me, and
only me, I I love the way thatfremen suck the water out of the
fallen sardaukar oh yeah, yeah,that was super cool.
I loved how they sucked thewater out of them and then, and
then they brought it back, ofcourse, for the scene where they
did that with jamis's water.
But, yes, super dope, I lovedit.

(01:19:13):
Hell yeah, our culture has noconcept.
What did you say?
It was grim.
It was grim, yeah, it was.
Also it was utilitarian, and heeven said, like this water is
disgusting, we're not going todrink it, but it's good for cool
, it's good for using as coolant.
So, yeah, which I found veryfunny, our culture has no
concept of sacred spaces, iswhat I?

(01:19:35):
Uh is a note I took Uh, and ourculture doesn't.
I doesn't.
I feel the united statesdoesn't hold anything sacred.
We, we as a, as as unitedstates american culture, don't
hold anything sacred.
People try to hold certainthings sacred and it ends up
being like the military or yeah,it's nationalism 100, the
police, and it's like no, thesearen't the sacred things.

(01:19:58):
These aren't the sacred thingsbecause they change based on
human nature.
The sacred things are thingsthat don't change based on human
nature, like they're thingsthat, but whatever like like
jessica's uh vagina.
Yeah getty prime is dope.
The ink fireworks were supercool.
Uh, I love the ink fireworksand I loved it.

(01:20:20):
The the whole planet was likeoversaturated.
It was very cool.
It kind of it kind of makes you, it kind of gives you an idea
of why they're like that.
If that's the planet they livedon, yeah, it's fucking.
It's gotta be a shitty place tolive, seems seems black and
white.
Yeah, oof, everything's blackand white.
Yeah, I wrote that womandominated fade sexually so

(01:20:44):
easily she walked in a littlebit, like within like 30 minutes
of meeting him, she was likeall right, I'm dominating, I am
totally dominating you sexually,I can get you to do anything,
yeah uh-huh, yeah, no, well andwell in the what-if scenario I
just want.

Ryan (01:21:04):
That's where I would differentiate myself from fade
um, because that the tendencytowards narcissism would be
completely overridden by thefact that every scene jessica,
what it's in was now altered byshe's getting eaten out, and I'm
just fucking spelling thefremen alphabet all up in there

(01:21:25):
is the fremen alphabet different?

James (01:21:28):
than it's irrelevant as far as she's concerned well,
yeah well, you don't know, she,she would know she's had the
water of life.

Ryan (01:21:37):
She would also me rolling into me, rolling in here,
spelling english alphabet.
She doesn't even know what thefuck I'm doing and that's why
she keeps me around she's likethis is the alphabet we're gonna
need to move on to poetryalright, fine, I'll learn it.
I'll learn it.
God damn.
So needy, yeah, no, and oh,eventually Paul would slit my

(01:22:01):
throat, you know, just cause I'malways up in there.
Paul's distracted, he doesn'tcare, he don't care.
So that's good, I got thatgoing for me.
So it's the royal fallaciousI'm spared by.

James (01:22:18):
Paul's lack of concern.
I believe it's fallacious.
Sorry the royal fallacious, Ibelieve it's the latest, sorry
the royal, the latest jessica.
My last note was that, uh,there's a lot of conversation
around the spectacle of themovie.
I think it's important to notethat it's not just good graphics

(01:22:38):
and stuff I know we talked alittle bit about this but it's
also innovation of the shots,the way they kind of displayed
the grandiosity of things wherethings were partially off screen
, where where we moved from fromwide shots to to long shots and
and conveyed, conveyed likemotion with the camera.

(01:23:00):
All of it was amazingcinematography that created
something that we couldn't lookaway from.
It's created something that wecouldn't look away from.
It's not something that we justdidn't appreciate.
I had a hard time looking awayfrom the screen because it was
so good.
When I wanted, like popcorn orwhatever, I was like fumbling
around in the dark because Ididn't want to look away.

Ryan (01:23:16):
It was so good and I agree with that entirely and all
commentary aside, that's athat's a fantastic place to end
it because that's the bare bonesof it.
So for those of you who havewatched the entirety of this
particular production have seenthat in my video here.

(01:23:38):
The sun has gone down and halfof my face is now completely
dark.
It is time to call the day onthis episode.
I hope you've taken somethingfrom this.
I hope you're not the guy whowas clapping at the end of Dune
2.
Thank you all so much forlistening.
Remember always that all films,in comparison to Zack Snyder's

(01:23:59):
Rebel Moon, are superior.
Thank you all.
Like and subscribe, comment anduh, as written.
It is as written.
Cheers, bye everybody.