May 20, 2025 • 7 mins
Ep. #771 | Pleasure is so much more than sex—and can be deeply expansive.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:02):
On this episode, the Pleasure inLife and the Life and pleasure,
this is the Holistic Alpha podcast where you unlock your
potential and elevate your life on a foundation of empowered
sacred sexuality. Hey guys, welcome back to the
show. I'm Steven Mathis.
Thanks for sharing a few minutesof your day here with me.
(00:24):
Let's talk about pleasure. First of all, let me ask you a
question. If I bring up the word pleasure
and just ask you, what does thatbring up for you?
Obviously I'm not going to be able to hear your response, but
take just a moment to kind of allow some things to bubble to
the surface in your mind. What does that word pleasure
bring up for you? Of course, in the context of
this show and a lot of things that that I talk about on this
(00:46):
podcast, it's going to bring up sex and sexual pleasure, of
course. But pleasure is so much more
than that, right? We can experience pleasure in so
many different ways. There are the sensual types of
pleasure and there's many other types of pleasure as well.
It is one of my favorite things in life.
One of my favorite topics actually is pleasure because
it's much deeper, much more layered, and much more powerful
(01:10):
than we often give it credit for.
If we just think about pleasure and we think, Oh well, I
experienced pleasure when I havesex or I experience pleasure in
my edging practice or in some other kind of touch and we kind
of leave it at that, that's great.
It's also only a small slice of what it really is because one of
the things that happens when we experience that kind of pleasure
(01:30):
is it brings more life to our life.
If it's in a positive way, in anintentional way, in a heart
fueled loving way, engaging withsex and experiencing that kind
of pleasure, whether it's alone with a or it's with a partner is
going to bring more life to yourlife, right?
I know a lot of you guys are experiencing that.
In your mindful edging practice in your relationships, you
(01:51):
experience how that kind of pleasure, it doesn't just feel
good in the moment, it actually brings more life force to you.
It enlightens you, it enlivens your life, it brings more life
to your life. And all pleasure does that,
right? The more pleasure we experience,
the more it brings life to our life.
(02:11):
So pursuing pleasure for the sake of a pleasure is actually
very positive thing. If it's in positive and mindful
ways, of course, there's ways ofexperiencing pleasure in the
moment that are a negative thingand we and we know that, right.
So it's about having the discernment to understand well,
what kind of pleasure is going to lead to bringing more life to
(02:33):
my life, and what kind of pleasure is actually going to
drag me down in the long run. But the other aspect of pleasure
is that we can find pleasure in everything.
A walk in the park, the sun shining on your skin, a cool
breeze on a warm day, hearing a loved one's voice, whatever it
is. We can find pleasure in every
single little moment. And when we do that, those
(02:56):
moments expand. Anything that we find pleasure
in, that expands. It becomes more expansive.
We feel it more. We feel it as an embodied thing.
So one of the most powerful words that I like to think about
now as it relates to this is Saver.
I have a good friend and client,Paul.
(03:16):
This is a word that came up fromhim actually in a conversation
around this. And that is savouring things.
That word savour, it means to really dive into the nuances of
an experience, right? If you're savouring a bite of
steak or something, right? You're not just getting it in,
swallowing it, right? You're really feeling into and
(03:37):
experiencing that whole little moment in time, right?
You're enjoying the taste and the texture and maybe the smell
or you're enjoying the experience of who who you're
eating it with. When you're savouring the
moment, you're bringing pleasureinto the moment.
And we can do that with literally everything, almost
(03:58):
everything, right? There's some very difficult life
circumstances that is not where this is not necessarily going to
apply, but most of our life, ourday-to-day life, including
things that you wouldn't normally think of as being
pleasurable. We can choose to find the
pleasure in those things. We could choose to actually
savor those moments. And the more that we do that,
(04:19):
the more life expanse, right? I'm standing here in this park
right now. If I was standing here and of
course not recording this, if I was just standing here and sort
of in my own thoughts, if I was often thoughts about some other
thing that's going to happen 3 hours from now today or I'm
complaining in my head because it's cold, which by the way,
Utah in the spring is crazy. We went from 90 to 50 basically
(04:44):
overnight. Little bit of fresh snow on the
mountains. So it's a little bit crazy.
I could be complaining about thecold, right?
How much life am I going to get out of this moment if I'm doing
those things, if I'm standing here in this park right now, but
I'm thinking about all that, youknow, that thing that's got to
get done next week or that building needs to get paid or
whatever the hell it is. I'm not getting a life out of
(05:06):
this moment that I could be getting if I savoured this
moment. If I was to actually look up and
think, gosh, it's really pretty how those clouds are kind of
across the sun right now. I really love the feeling of the
sun in my eyes. That breeze feels really good.
I'm super grateful to be experiencing this body that's
healthy, that I get to move around and walk around it.
(05:27):
When I actually choose to savor the moment, it brings me into my
body. That's a big thing, right?
One of the most important thingsfor having a presence that
allows us to get more life out of our life is getting back into
our body. And when we focus on pleasure,
it gets us into our body becausehow do we experience pleasure?
We experience pleasure through our body, right through our five
(05:50):
senses. So when we focus on the pleasure
in a moment, when we focus on savouring the moment.
So that word pleasure, that might kind of bring up, you
might have a hard time sort of making that connection to feel
pleasure from a walk, right? But you can savour that moment
like you could savour really good bite of food.
You can savour a moment of conversation with a good friend.
(06:12):
The more that we savour things, we use that powerful thing that
is called pleasure to actually experience and embody more of
the life that is available to usin this moment in life.
Because as I stand right here, there's limitless life force,
limitless beauty and awesomenessavailable to all of us in every
(06:35):
single moment. We can limit it, we often do to
some degree, sometimes to a large degree.
We can limit how much life we can actually get out of that
moment, or we can expand it. We can tap into more of it.
And one of the most powerful ways to tap into more of it is
focus on pleasure. Enjoy things, savor the moments,
(06:55):
savor those little sensations. I promise you will find more
life in your life. It will lift you up.
It'll help you be more disciplined.
You know, that's you might not think about pleasure and
discipline as going together, right?
But when are you most disciplined?
When you when you feel good, probably when your vibration's
high, when your emotions are in a good place, it's a lot easier
(07:17):
to be disciplined then and make those good choices.
So the more that you focus on savoring every moment, the more
you're going to lift up and enlighten your vibration.
You're going to have better relationships, you're going to
be more disciplined, you're going to make better choices.
Pleasure absolutely can bring incredible things to your life,
and of course that applies to edging and sex and all of those
(07:39):
things, but it's so much more than that.
So I'm grateful for pleasure. I'm grateful for you guys.
Taking a few minutes to share this with me here today.
Send you guys good vibes. Have an amazing rest of your
day. We'll talk to you soon.
Dive deeper at holisticalpha.com.
On this episode, the Pleasure inLife and the Life and pleasure,
this is the Holistic Alpha podcast where you unlock your
potential and elevate your life on a foundation of empowered
sacred sexuality. Hey guys, welcome back to the
show. I'm Steven Mathis.
Thanks for sharing a few minutesof your day here with me.
(00:24):
Let's talk about pleasure. First of all, let me ask you a
question. If I bring up the word pleasure
and just ask you, what does thatbring up for you?
Obviously I'm not going to be able to hear your response, but
take just a moment to kind of allow some things to bubble to
the surface in your mind. What does that word pleasure
bring up for you? Of course, in the context of
this show and a lot of things that that I talk about on this
(00:46):
podcast, it's going to bring up sex and sexual pleasure, of
course. But pleasure is so much more
than that, right? We can experience pleasure in so
many different ways. There are the sensual types of
pleasure and there's many other types of pleasure as well.
It is one of my favorite things in life.
One of my favorite topics actually is pleasure because
it's much deeper, much more layered, and much more powerful
(01:10):
than we often give it credit for.
If we just think about pleasure and we think, Oh well, I
experienced pleasure when I havesex or I experience pleasure in
my edging practice or in some other kind of touch and we kind
of leave it at that, that's great.
It's also only a small slice of what it really is because one of
the things that happens when we experience that kind of pleasure
(01:30):
is it brings more life to our life.
If it's in a positive way, in anintentional way, in a heart
fueled loving way, engaging withsex and experiencing that kind
of pleasure, whether it's alone with a or it's with a partner is
going to bring more life to yourlife, right?
I know a lot of you guys are experiencing that.
In your mindful edging practice in your relationships, you
(01:51):
experience how that kind of pleasure, it doesn't just feel
good in the moment, it actually brings more life force to you.
It enlightens you, it enlivens your life, it brings more life
to your life. And all pleasure does that,
right? The more pleasure we experience,
the more it brings life to our life.
(02:11):
So pursuing pleasure for the sake of a pleasure is actually
very positive thing. If it's in positive and mindful
ways, of course, there's ways ofexperiencing pleasure in the
moment that are a negative thingand we and we know that, right.
So it's about having the discernment to understand well,
what kind of pleasure is going to lead to bringing more life to
(02:33):
my life, and what kind of pleasure is actually going to
drag me down in the long run. But the other aspect of pleasure
is that we can find pleasure in everything.
A walk in the park, the sun shining on your skin, a cool
breeze on a warm day, hearing a loved one's voice, whatever it
is. We can find pleasure in every
single little moment. And when we do that, those
(02:56):
moments expand. Anything that we find pleasure
in, that expands. It becomes more expansive.
We feel it more. We feel it as an embodied thing.
So one of the most powerful words that I like to think about
now as it relates to this is Saver.
I have a good friend and client,Paul.
(03:16):
This is a word that came up fromhim actually in a conversation
around this. And that is savouring things.
That word savour, it means to really dive into the nuances of
an experience, right? If you're savouring a bite of
steak or something, right? You're not just getting it in,
swallowing it, right? You're really feeling into and
(03:37):
experiencing that whole little moment in time, right?
You're enjoying the taste and the texture and maybe the smell
or you're enjoying the experience of who who you're
eating it with. When you're savouring the
moment, you're bringing pleasureinto the moment.
And we can do that with literally everything, almost
(03:58):
everything, right? There's some very difficult life
circumstances that is not where this is not necessarily going to
apply, but most of our life, ourday-to-day life, including
things that you wouldn't normally think of as being
pleasurable. We can choose to find the
pleasure in those things. We could choose to actually
savor those moments. And the more that we do that,
(04:19):
the more life expanse, right? I'm standing here in this park
right now. If I was standing here and of
course not recording this, if I was just standing here and sort
of in my own thoughts, if I was often thoughts about some other
thing that's going to happen 3 hours from now today or I'm
complaining in my head because it's cold, which by the way,
Utah in the spring is crazy. We went from 90 to 50 basically
(04:44):
overnight. Little bit of fresh snow on the
mountains. So it's a little bit crazy.
I could be complaining about thecold, right?
How much life am I going to get out of this moment if I'm doing
those things, if I'm standing here in this park right now, but
I'm thinking about all that, youknow, that thing that's got to
get done next week or that building needs to get paid or
whatever the hell it is. I'm not getting a life out of
(05:06):
this moment that I could be getting if I savoured this
moment. If I was to actually look up and
think, gosh, it's really pretty how those clouds are kind of
across the sun right now. I really love the feeling of the
sun in my eyes. That breeze feels really good.
I'm super grateful to be experiencing this body that's
healthy, that I get to move around and walk around it.
(05:27):
When I actually choose to savor the moment, it brings me into my
body. That's a big thing, right?
One of the most important thingsfor having a presence that
allows us to get more life out of our life is getting back into
our body. And when we focus on pleasure,
it gets us into our body becausehow do we experience pleasure?
We experience pleasure through our body, right through our five
(05:50):
senses. So when we focus on the pleasure
in a moment, when we focus on savouring the moment.
So that word pleasure, that might kind of bring up, you
might have a hard time sort of making that connection to feel
pleasure from a walk, right? But you can savour that moment
like you could savour really good bite of food.
You can savour a moment of conversation with a good friend.
(06:12):
The more that we savour things, we use that powerful thing that
is called pleasure to actually experience and embody more of
the life that is available to usin this moment in life.
Because as I stand right here, there's limitless life force,
limitless beauty and awesomenessavailable to all of us in every
(06:35):
single moment. We can limit it, we often do to
some degree, sometimes to a large degree.
We can limit how much life we can actually get out of that
moment, or we can expand it. We can tap into more of it.
And one of the most powerful ways to tap into more of it is
focus on pleasure. Enjoy things, savor the moments,
(06:55):
savor those little sensations. I promise you will find more
life in your life. It will lift you up.
It'll help you be more disciplined.
You know, that's you might not think about pleasure and
discipline as going together, right?
But when are you most disciplined?
When you when you feel good, probably when your vibration's
high, when your emotions are in a good place, it's a lot easier
(07:17):
to be disciplined then and make those good choices.
So the more that you focus on savoring every moment, the more
you're going to lift up and enlighten your vibration.
You're going to have better relationships, you're going to
be more disciplined, you're going to make better choices.
Pleasure absolutely can bring incredible things to your life,
and of course that applies to edging and sex and all of those
(07:39):
things, but it's so much more than that.
So I'm grateful for pleasure. I'm grateful for you guys.
Taking a few minutes to share this with me here today.
Send you guys good vibes. Have an amazing rest of your
day. We'll talk to you soon.
Dive deeper at holisticalpha.com.
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