Why Sex is The Ideal Foundation to Grow and Build On

Ep. #769 | Being a sexual man is a powerful driver of positive growth.

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Episode Transcript

(00:02):
On this episode, Why sex provides the ideal foundation
for us to grow from and build onin our lives as men.
This is the holistic Alpha Male Optimization podcast where we
help you unleash your true poweras a man.

(00:25):
Hey, guys, welcome back to the show or welcome to the show for
the first time. I'm glad we've crossed paths.
I'm Stephen Mathis. I'm very glad that you're here.
Thanks for sharing a few minuteswith me.
Let's talk about why sex is actually the ideal foundation
for us to build our life on. And I know that for a lot of
men, that might actually sound abit like kind of a foreign

(00:49):
concept. Like what?
What are you talking about, dude?
Because there's a lot of guys who have, while they, they love
sex and they have felt a lot of amazing things from that, it
hasn't necessarily led to growthin their life.
In fact, in a lot of cases it leads the other direction,
right? Sex and sexual energy and sexual
desire and pleasure, all of these things can indeed lead us

(01:09):
down very negative paths, right?Many men have, in essence,
destroyed themselves from the inside out, have destroyed
relationships, have, you know, caused all sorts of problems in
their lives because of sex. But the very reason that that
happens is actually the same reason why it is the ideal

(01:31):
foundation for us to grow from. And it's not just that it's the
most powerful energy moving through our body because it is.
That's true as well. But there's a different layer to
that. Yes, it is the most powerful
energy in our body, but here's the reason why it is actually
the best foundation for us to grow from.
It is a huge motivator. It's it's the biggest motivator

(01:54):
that guys have most men, right, At least in a lot of ways, a lot
of situations, a lot of different aspects of life that
that plays out in sex is a huge motivator, right?
Guys have thrown away relationships and families
because of sex. They have again gone down very
negative paths because of sex. It motivates us big time.

(02:18):
But we can use that exact fact to help us grow, right?
It is a big motivator. So what does that mean?
That means that if we can Orientourselves to sexuality and how
we interact with it, if we can sort of reorient, that we can
use that same fact that it's incredibly motivating to help us

(02:40):
get better. Let me give you a specific
example. Alcohol is something that has
been a challenge for me at timesin my life.
No question. I was never like a get super
drunk kind of drinker. In fact, I I really hate that
feeling. However, something that has been
a challenge at times is drinkingfar too often, right?

(03:01):
1245 beers, whatever it is on a daily basis for stretches of
time or something like that, right Where no, it doesn't
prevent me from functioning. But is it negative in my life?
Absolutely. And it's something that's very
hard to get away from indeed. I know a lot of you guys have
had experiences of your own withalcohol, or maybe you are.

(03:23):
Now. One thing that actually helped
me so much at times in that battle was recognizing how it
was impacting my sexuality. There were times unquestionably,
when it was in essence destroying my libido.
It was destroying my erections. In fact.
There was a time in my mid 20s when I was drinking a lot.
Probably didn't have other greathabits, but it was for sure the

(03:45):
drinking that did it. I, in essence, had essentially
functional erectile dysfunction,right?
Meaning not 100% of the time, like it wasn't completely non
functional, but it was not good.And you know what it was?
It was the alcohol. You know what helped me get away
from the alcohol was thinking about and really allowing myself
to sit with the fact that it wasin essence, destroying this part

(04:07):
of my life that I cared very deeply about.
And while that wasn't the only thing that was a motivating
factor to stay away from alcohol, while it wasn't of
course the only positive effect that quitting alcohol would
bring, that was the one that wasthe biggest motivator, right?
That was the one that had some of those challenging times when
that urge would come up. That was the one that actually

(04:28):
helped me make the good choice. It is a huge motivating factor.
Again, for a lot of guys, it is really the biggest motivating
factor. So if we can, when we choose to
use that in a positive way, it is such a powerful thing and
what it will do to help us grow.So as you look at different

(04:49):
parts of your life, whether it'syour weight, you want to drop
some weight or you want to get stronger or you want to improve
your diet or you need to reduce your stress or whatever aspect
of life that kind of nags at you.
And you know, it's this thing, part of my life is not that
great. Tune into, well, how does this
affect your sexuality, right? Tune into that motivating
factor. I can promise you both on the

(05:11):
positive side in terms of tryingto, for example, have better sex
with your partner or find a new partner or improve on a the
positive side, right? Transmute more of that energy
into creating things in your life.
Or it's the negative side, right?
Maybe you're having some kind ofstruggle or challenge in that
area of your life, So your erections are a problem or your

(05:34):
libido's a problem, or some of the things in sexuality are
bugging you. Tune into that as a motivating
factor to make positive changes in other aspects of your life.
We know, I know that if you've made it this far in this
episode, and probably if you found the show at all, the sex
motivates you. It absolutely does, right?
Use that, Use it. I can promise you I had used it.

(05:58):
One of the reasons that you're even hearing from me now, one of
the reasons that I didn't go down so many paths that I didn't
go further down them and get lost down them.
One of the biggest reasons is because I used sex as a
motivating factor. All right, So I tested things
and I continue to test things. Anytime I make any kind of diet

(06:20):
changes or habit changes or anything is happening in my
life, I pay attention to how is it affecting my sexuality
because I know that if somethingnegatively effects that it's
very easy for me to want to stayaway from that thing.
It's much easier than if I just had some other reason.
For example, in the past, I was significantly overweight, right?

(06:42):
For a while and nothing really worked all that well to get in
better shape. And there were some other things
that played into my life and my journey for sure.
But I can promise you right now,from a a diet standpoint, that
would not be that big of a motivating factor.
If something negatively effects my erections like a food
instantly, Nope, I'm out. I'm done, right?

(07:04):
So I've discovered in recent years that dairy will do that
for me. It's probably milk proteins.
Whatever it is doesn't agree with my hormones.
I could digest it just fine, I don't have any digestive issues.
But if I eat milk proteins, it negatively effects my hormones,
my libido, my erections. So guess what is really easy for
me to stay away from now? Dairy.

(07:26):
Because it's not worth the taste.
Because that motivates me, right?
I don't want it to negatively affect those things.
So pay attention to this, think about this, use this as a tool
going forward is a very powerfultool.
You know that it motivates you. Use that in a very intentional
and smart way and it will significantly help this path of

(07:46):
growth that we're on. Thanks for sharing part of that
path with me. Sending you guys good vibes.
Have an amazing rest of your day.
We'll talk to you soon.