February 13, 2025 • 28 mins
In this bonus episode, grace shares what's underneath the frustration, resentment, guilt and the plaguing sense that you're not doing enough to save the world.
This un-embodied paradox is probably why your business isn’t working, why your creations don’t have that sparkle, why your mission isn’t moving, your creativity is stagnant, or your relationship is just… ok.
Be sure to listen to the end, for a simple and portable embodiment practice to help you ground into the present moment.
“Your capacity and your prowess to embody the Beauty of the New Earth is more important than all the things you are DO-ing.” — grace allerdice
LINKS
If you enjoyed the episode, check out —
- from Judgement to Mystery 🌀
- the Magic of the Third â–ł
- NOW is Grace : Love the World. 🌎❤️‍🔥
Mentioned in the episode—
- Gospel of Thomas, translation by Jean Yves Leloup
🌹 more about MA —
MA is an emerging membership offered by grace allerdice weaving the Medicines of this Moment for those who are ready to ****make peace with what Is love and enjoy your existence impact material reality.
join MA —> peruse the sales page and welcome IN!
join the waitlist for MA —> be the first to know to get the doors open as well. you’ll also receive bonus information about what’s coming up inside of MA to help you make the most informed decision possible.
Stay Connected —
Subscribe to the home—body podcast wherever you get your listens.
This podcast is produced by Softer Sounds. ✨
————————————————————————————
thanks for listening. peace, be well. 🙏
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
mary grace allerdice (00:05):
Grace. My name is Grace, and you're
listening to the homebodypodcast.
The world has ended many timesbefore and will again. Who are
(00:27):
you going to be? The New Earthhovers. Greetings. This is a
spontaneous quickie episode thatwoke me up at one o'clock this
morning. Just because somethingwakes me up at one o'clock in
the morning does not necessarilymean it needs to be shared in
(00:49):
real time, but this one wasclear that it wanted to be. So
here we are a spontaneous bonusme episode. At the original
publication of this episode, I'min the middle of an opening
launch to a new membership Icreated called Ma. And so the
themes and invitations that arecoming up in this episode are
very much connected to thatlaunch the offerings inside of
(01:11):
the membership, because that'swhat I'm swimming in right now.
And if you've been getting theemails for those in your inbox,
you might recognize and pick upon some of those themes. If
you'd like more information,you'd like to be in the know
about mA in the future or now inreal time, be sure to join the
wait list below so that you getthe emails about that,
especially if you're listeningto this in the future, because
(01:33):
these themes will continue to berelevant as the container grows
and emerges. Since this is aquickie episode. I'm just going
to dive right in. I'm not goingto take as much time to lay a
lot of foundations as I havebeen in recent longer form
episodes. So we're just going togo in and see what happens when
(01:59):
we witness the pain of theworld. Often we want to fix it.
And this is an understandableimpulse, and it's also one that
we're in cultured to take right?
If someone's you know, about toget hit by a car, our impulse is
to, like, run in front of themand push them out of the way.
Right? These are all impulsesthat exist for a reason, and
we're grateful for them, andthere is a place where they work
(02:24):
and they're really functional.
However, when we're thinkingabout the chronic pain of the
world or humanity, when we justtake that acute let's fix it,
energy, the sink is broken,let's fix it. That's a different
scale that we're working with,and it's also has a different
(02:47):
seed that we're working with. Isa different way that we're being
called to interact with thatit's understandable the impulse
that we have to fix. And as aculture, we don't understand or
value initiations as a culture.
We don't understand or valuedeath cycles. We don't
(03:08):
understand or value discomfort.
And we are in a massive humanchapter right now that asks us
to become skillful with theseespecially if we think of
ourselves as a leader or acreative or a visionary or a
healer, someone who feels likethey have something of service
(03:30):
to offer to the world and be tothe world. And I'm looking
around, and people are justdroning out and distracting out
all over the place, and othersare just efforting harder at
what they already know how todo, which is push hard in the
external world. And the impulsethat we have to be of service is
(03:52):
great, and there is somethingmore nuanced here, in the energy
that is different from justfixing let's not conflate those
because they're different. Mostpeople are running their energy
and their life in such a waythat they are avoiding some key
understandings. Most people whowant to be of service are
running their energy in a waythat actually keeps them from
(04:14):
accomplishing the very thingthat they want, and it's because
they don't have the spiritualtools or relationships or
understandings that they needthey have not been initiated
into a deeper place of seatedmagical power. And when I refer
to magic, I'm not talking aboutlike Disney movies, bibbity,
boppity boo. I'm talking aboutthe actual path of magic. And so
(04:41):
we want to be of service, and wego about trying to, quote, fix
the world, fix humanity, solveall the problems. And what's at
the bottom of this often istruly that we don't want to be
in pain at the world's pain.
That's often really what'struthfully underneath this. Uh,
underneath is not the awareness,the embodiment, to truly be in
(05:03):
compassion, to truly be ofservice. Yet we're operating on
an engine that's really justtrying to fix the world so that
we don't have to be in pain atthe world's pain. So we go about
looking around at externalmaterial reality to see what we
can fix, how we can arrange thefurniture in the world's house
so that we can make the fear goaway, or talk ourselves out of
(05:26):
feeling guilty. And we wish,hope, think, pray, that all of
our furniture rearranging willbe enough to make a difference.
And on a subtle, energeticlevel, most people are doing
this so that they can feelabsolved of the guilt that they
have for being here, or theguilt that they have for, quote,
being a part of the problem, orthe guilt that they have this
(05:47):
deeper than that, guilt forbeing on the planet, on a subtle
level we're trying to fix sothat we can also be absolved of
the guilt we have for having abeautiful life, or send their
privilege, whatever you want tocall it. So on a subtle level,
we're trying to fix the world sothat we don't have to feel our
own limitation or face our ownpain or grief we're fixing so
(06:10):
that we don't have to deal witha deeper wound, which is often
I'm not sure that I belong hereor what I'm doing here, and then
after we've done a full realityboxing round of fixing, and
we've burned ourselves out orleft distraught and frustrated
(06:31):
and more alone and maybe alittle hopeless, when fixing
inevitably does not succeed, itbecomes a wound That feeds blame
and feeling ashamed andworthless and powerless and not
belonging on the planet. Side.
Quick note, most nonprofits arerunning on this energy stream.
So for those of you who have runa nonprofit or worked for one,
(06:54):
you might recognize this dynamicin real time. And for a lot of
people, it's running on themicro on an individual level.
You know how, if you haveexperience in that world, you
know how life sucking, it canbe, and this energetic current
is often why, because it'srunning the program like, if I
don't succeed in fixing then Iam like, ashamed, guilty,
(07:14):
worthless, powerless. I don'tbelong here anymore. My
existence is a problem thatwould not be said, probably out
loud. Most people in this pooldon't have the language to
articulate that, but someversion of this program is often
what's running, and the fixinginevitably doesn't work, right?
We keep doing it, though,because for most people, it's
(07:34):
the only strategy that we know.
So they're like, Well, I triedto fix it and I can't, but I
can't just sit back and donothing. And it feeds this crazy
reality that I see all the time,where, instead of an embodied,
real gratitude at the unlikelymiracle of being alive today,
people are shrouded and weigheddown by guilt, people who have
(07:57):
already hit the human jackpot,people who are privileged and
the most traditionally educatedand by the world standards, the
most resourced people in theworld are walking around guilt
ridden and depressed and angryand entitled and disillusioned.
If you're listening to this, youprobably have more resources at
(08:17):
your fingertips than you knowwhat to do with which program
should I take? Just think of howyou feel standing in the shampoo
aisle at the drug store or thegrocery store. That's your life
on some level. You can walkoutside right now and probably
aren't worried about gettingbombed on the way to the doctor.
What an incredible blessing. Andyet everybody is fucking
(08:38):
miserable and ungrateful, andyou ask them how they're doing
with their incredibly stockedlife, and they're like, Oh, I
could hardly get out of bedtoday. That pointed something
much deeper. I'm not saying thisto make you feel guilty if this
fits into how you're feelingright now. I'm just trying to
illustrate it to create somemore awareness so that you can
(09:00):
work with it, and we can startto work on it as a collective.
We have this unconscious beliefthat if we're not miserable,
we're not helping. If we're notmad, we're not paying attention.
If you're not dysregulated outof your mind, you must not care
about the world. And that'sbullshit. It's not true. It's a
story that's made up by peoplewho don't have the capacity to
understand another way. And it'sa story made up by people who
(09:23):
are disconnected from their ownenergy, from embodiment, from
source, from magic. And it'ssuch a common story that we hook
up on without questioning it.
Most people are. We're runningon this story in some way, and
we don't even question it. Mytake is that gratitude is an
(09:45):
outcome of healing, and it'salso a practice, and all of
those things that you feelguilty about need to become
things that you're incrediblygrateful for, which is not going
to happen just by me sayingthis, right, we're not going to
perform gratitude. And. 10, butit's really an invitation to
embark on an actual embodied,spiritual devotional path, where
(10:07):
you get to the reality that thisis so obvious and real to you
that you become magic.
In my personal opinion, whichyou don't have to agree with.
Obviously, those of us who havethese resourced material lives,
especially compared to mostpeople on the planet, we have a
(10:28):
spiritual responsibility tohumanity and to consciousness
and to life. We have aresponsibility to use our energy
to do the great work and to healon a deep level, to recall our
projections, to alchemize ourshit on behalf of the world,
because we can, because we dohave the time, we do have the
(10:50):
bandwidth and the practice to doit. We may not want to, and
that's something also we canwork on. But in my opinion, that
is our responsibility. We saidyes to this mission, and we can
get grateful that life hasprovided us with the opportunity
to say yes to doing this greatwork in real time. This is a
(11:11):
spiritual path, and it isspiritual work, and when I look
around, I don't see a lot ofpeople making time for it,
because they're too busy. Quote,helping and fixing this
embodiment is the pathway forall change. We want to master
and fix the world, but mostpeople are unwilling to embark
(11:33):
on a great work or of thespiritual path. And I find that
interesting. How is the worldeven hear what's holding it up,
the new earth, or the sense thata more beautiful future is
possible is hovering right now.
And a lot of you sensitivepeople out there can feel it.
You can feel this frequencyhovering and wanting to come in,
(11:56):
but what wants to come intoEarth gets born in through your
embodiment, through yourawareness, through your
presence, your creations, whichcan also include your children.
If you aren't embodying it, itain't coming in. So rearranging
all the external world furniturewe want if there's no true
(12:20):
spirit embodiment behind it atthat point, it's just giving you
something to do. It's being adistraction. Let me say this
differently, your capacity, yourprowess, to embody the beauty of
the New Earth is more importantthan all the things that you are
doing. Said another way, yourdevotion and your spiritual
(12:42):
commitments to being in thislife, in this world right now
are the most important thing youcan do. So if you're feeling
defeated and burned out andtired and guilty and afraid and
powerless and just completelyoverburdened by this chapter of
the story of the world thatwe're in. It's time to reorient
and redefine where your truepower comes from. It's time to
(13:04):
reorient to the level of yourown actual coherence between
your infinite self your timebased self. It's time to assess
your relationship to spirit andwhat you're doing on earth here
with it. And most peoplelistening to this, not all of
you, and that's not wrong. Noone's right or wrong here. But
(13:26):
most people listening to thiswere born with this sense that
you've got a mission, likethere's something, maybe
something big, that you feellike you're here to do or be you
have a sense that there's thisvocation or this calling,
something that sits inside ofyou and on your back, like
something you're here torealize, to make real. Not
everyone feels this, and it isthis diamond, this seed, that is
(13:48):
behind your ambition and yourdrive to succeed and to be of
service. And that's a beautifulthing, but that means we have to
become skillful with the spiritembodiment in a really, real
way, in a very timely way. Iwould also add, and I can
promise you, that the thing youfeel called to be is not a
(14:10):
burned out and bitter nonprofitdirector or impoverished
business owner. So if that'sbeing the wall that you're
hitting up against is trying totie, it's time to try something
new and get back to what isbehind matter, the MA behind
matter, because the big paradoxunderlying this particular life
(14:30):
lock is this, you have to becomesomebody before you become
nobody. Ram Dass said that, Ithink it's the easiest, most
succinct way to talk about whatI'm talking about. You have to
become somebody before youbecome nobody. And all of the I
just want to be of service,people probably skipped the
(14:51):
become somebody part, and theywent right to I can be nobody. I
can be nobody. And so being ofservice. Is conflated with
collapsing, fawning, being superco dependent with God and
reality and outsourcing yourcenter, and it's keeping you
from loving and enjoying yourlife, and it's keeping you also
energetically from being fullyon the planet. And then all of
(15:13):
the people who are really goodat being somebody you know,
those directors who are great atrearranging the furniture of the
world, but at some point it'snot going to be enough. And if
you're at the I'm a somebodystage, you get to lean into the
nobody stage, which is thisexquisite point of true magical
manifestation. Both of theseneed each other. Somebody needs
(15:35):
Nobody. Nobody needs somebody.
Both of these need each other.
Both of these kinds of peopleneed each other, and also both
of us need the opposite,embodied in ourselves. We don't
heal in isolation. We don't healat a pole. We heal in the
magical paradox of the third. Weheal in relationship, and we
(15:55):
heal with spirit. We arespiritual beings having a human
experience. Lest we forget, youhave to become an embodied self
full thing before you cancoherently lay that down in
service and experience thefreedom and the bliss of true
service. You trying to be ofservice because secretly,
(16:17):
underneath you feel guilty andlike you don't deserve to be
here. That's not service. That'syou trying to medicate with your
behavior. And you're not foolingenergy. It's not you can't fool
that. You can't hide that on anenergetic level. It's running
honestly truth. Will see that,and once you master your
medicine and come away from yourpole into the magic alchemy of
(16:41):
that third space when you learnto do both somebody and nobody
at the same time. It becomesthis infinity loop running in
your relationships, your life,your work, and it also becomes a
great conversation you are doingwith life, somebody, nobody,
somebody, nobody. This paradoxhere is probably why, if you've
(17:08):
hit like a stall in yourbusiness, if your creations
don't feel like they have thesparkle, if you feel like your
mission is not moving, or likeyour creativity is stagnant, or
your relationship is just okay,this is probably what's
underneath it, or it's why allthe furniture is moving around,
(17:28):
but you're still frustrated,angry and resentful at the
world, and plagued by a senseof, I'm not doing enough. And
the truth is, it's who you befirst, not what you do, and most
people are just wedding anddoing because culturally, that's
what we can see. We've lost ourskill as a culture and a society
(17:51):
in the urban west to even noticewho we be, but it matters how
you touch the world, the qualitywith which your spirit is in the
world. Touching the world, itmatters more than anything else,
and this requires more masteryand attention in your life than
(18:15):
anything else. And I'm nottalking about how you touch the
world, as in, like, Oh, I'mtouching the world. How small
can I make my carbon footprint?
That's not the conversation. Besomebody. Yes, your life costs
something to be here. Lifewanted you here badly enough
that it's got the cost of yourlife in the blueprint, because
(18:36):
you are here. And life is not amistake. It matters how you
presence in the world more thananything else. So your guilt,
your shame, your powerlessness,your fear, your anger, your
resentment, bitterness. It's notsome private thing that you're
hiding. It's not it is somethingthat you're contributing to the
collective, and magically,compassionately, it can become
(19:02):
something that you heal and youmetabolize and free. On behalf
of the collective,Yeshua said, when you bring
forth that within you, then thatwill save you. When you make the
inner like the outer, then youwill enter the kingdom. The
(19:27):
first class I'm teaching insideof the MA membership, and I'm
teaching it live is an immersionon sort of Yeshua wisdom drops,
and in May we'll tension thatwith the wisdom of the whore and
the holy woman. And these twosayings in particular, are a
(19:49):
couple of codes that we'll beplaying with, and they're from
the Gospel of Thomas, which wasone of the books not included in
the Bible and dug up. The desertin 1947 but this code, when you
bring forth that within you,then that will save you. Yeshua
is code your inner landscape iswhat manifests in your presence,
(20:10):
is what people experience inyour presence, is what life gets
from your presence. So don'tautomatically take this as like
punishment or guilt tripping,you know? Oh, now I have to be
even more perfect and control mypresence even more and yet
another bad thing about me thatI'm doing wrong that's not the
real journey. That's yourwounded inner child. The real
(20:32):
journey is you got to get sodown with receiving inhuman,
godly amounts of grace andunconditional love that you
become the good that happens tothe world, not you do the good
that happens to the world. Youbecome the good that happens to
the world. That is the only waythis profound alchemical journey
(20:54):
is the way the inner becomes theouter, which becomes the inner,
which becomes the outer. All thedoing, all the drive, has to
become the elixir of your beingthat you drink daily. The elixir
that who you are is the medicineyou are the medicine. You are
(21:17):
the wand for the magic. You arethe lightning rod for what wants
to come down. You are theelixir. What does it taste like
when the thirsty come for adrink at your fountain? Who you
be? This is what we're making,an apologetic space for inside
(21:40):
of Ma the externals in your lifepull on you naturally, and this
inner outer world building isthe great work of magic. And all
all chemical paths, who we be isthe thing that we tend to de
prioritize and don't make spacefor. But if we're going to get
really honest and reallycoherent and truly be the full
(22:02):
humanity, this is the mostimportant thing. So you not only
impact life, but you also loveand enjoy your life. So Ma, the
membership, it's emerging, andit weaves together the medicines
of this moment. And it's forthose of you who are ready to
(22:25):
make peace with what is you'reready to love and enjoy your
existence and impact materialreality. And I'm considering it
a sanctuary for this kind ofwork, for building this wild,
erotic bridge between yourregular, mundane life, your
devotion in the world at large,that inner and all the layers of
(22:48):
the outer. This bridge is not aheavy laden backpack filled with
guilt and all the things thatyou have to do to be a good
person. It's quite the oppositeof that. It is becoming the
light of true presence, theseed, the diamond that you
already have. Her bridge islight, and it's surrendered, and
it's like the self laying downfor the beloved. It's got the
(23:11):
heart wide open, and it's turnedon for the road ahead. We can't
do this Great Alchemy alone. Wedon't heal in isolation.
Unfortunately, that would be so.
There are many times in my lifewhere I wish I could but MA in
the form of a membership, is acommitment to embodying these
(23:31):
transmissions and being asupport for their coming to
earth, these medicines ofChrist, consciousness, the
sacred feminine and alchemy,which is the art and the
spiritual skills oftransformation. So the day that
this episode is live in realtime, I am in the middle of
launching this membership at afounder rate, which is going to
(23:52):
be the cheapest rate that Ma isever available. So we want to
welcome you in and make it aneasy yes for you at this stage.
So if you're listening to thisbefore Wednesday, February 19,
2025 the doors are open, and youcan click the link in the show
notes to learn more, or you canjust go ahead and sign up if
you're listening to this in thefuture, after February 19, 2025
(24:17):
there is also a link in the shownotes to join the wait list, so
that, if you just want to be inthe know, you want to learn more
about it, the next time thedoors are open, you can have
access to that information tomake an aligned decision for you
at this time, I hope you take adeep breath. I hope you become
more aware of your presence, andyou go outside today and you sit
(24:40):
down if you're not driving rightnow, perhaps even now, close
your eyes. Lean back a littlebit, take your attention to. The
(25:01):
space behind your sternum, rightin the center of your chest,
and think of something that youfeel truly grateful for, no
pretend ease, no pretendingsomething you can honestly say,
(25:23):
I feel deep gratitude for this.
And if you can't think ofanything, then you can sit in
presence with that vulnerabilityand the openness to be willing
to hold gratitude and just letthat sensation of gratitude.
Maybe you're seeing it as acolor. Maybe you're feeling it
as an actual feeling or asensation in your physical body.
(25:45):
Let it fill up that space in thecenter of your chest. Let it
spill out into the rest of yourshoulders that come up your
collarbone and your throat andspill down your arms, all the
way down to your fingertips, andfilling up your belly and your
pelvis and your back, down yourlegs, filling up the 3d of your
(26:11):
body all the sides, all the wayup your neck, filling up your
face and behind your eyes andbehind your palate, all the
spaces of your head and yourbrain and your skull. Just take
a couple more deep breaths andreally feel the embodiment of
(26:36):
that. Or again, if you don'tauthentically connect with a
sensation or image of gratituderight now, feel the openness to
it, or the willingness thedesire to embody it,
(26:57):
and take one more full deepbreath here, keeping this in
your awareness, and as you openyour eyes, play with how long
can I hold this in my body as Icontinue to move about my day,
as I drive? Notice when itleaves. Notice if you can bring
(27:19):
it back. Peace. Be well.
Thank you so much for listening.
If you enjoyed the episode,please take a few moments to
(27:40):
subscribe to the show leave us areview and share the episode.
These small tasks help ourindependent podcast so much. Be
sure to also check out the shownotes below to learn more about
any resources, guests orsponsors that we shared with you
today. Our intro and outro musicwas created by artists Aaron
palavic and Jared Kelly. Ourpodcast logo was created by
(28:02):
Elaine Stevenson, and this showis produced by softer sound
studio. Thank you for beinghere. Be well. Peace. You
Grace. My name is Grace, and you're
listening to the homebodypodcast.
The world has ended many timesbefore and will again. Who are
(00:27):
you going to be? The New Earthhovers. Greetings. This is a
spontaneous quickie episode thatwoke me up at one o'clock this
morning. Just because somethingwakes me up at one o'clock in
the morning does not necessarilymean it needs to be shared in
(00:49):
real time, but this one wasclear that it wanted to be. So
here we are a spontaneous bonusme episode. At the original
publication of this episode, I'min the middle of an opening
launch to a new membership Icreated called Ma. And so the
themes and invitations that arecoming up in this episode are
very much connected to thatlaunch the offerings inside of
(01:11):
the membership, because that'swhat I'm swimming in right now.
And if you've been getting theemails for those in your inbox,
you might recognize and pick upon some of those themes. If
you'd like more information,you'd like to be in the know
about mA in the future or now inreal time, be sure to join the
wait list below so that you getthe emails about that,
especially if you're listeningto this in the future, because
(01:33):
these themes will continue to berelevant as the container grows
and emerges. Since this is aquickie episode. I'm just going
to dive right in. I'm not goingto take as much time to lay a
lot of foundations as I havebeen in recent longer form
episodes. So we're just going togo in and see what happens when
(01:59):
we witness the pain of theworld. Often we want to fix it.
And this is an understandableimpulse, and it's also one that
we're in cultured to take right?
If someone's you know, about toget hit by a car, our impulse is
to, like, run in front of themand push them out of the way.
Right? These are all impulsesthat exist for a reason, and
we're grateful for them, andthere is a place where they work
(02:24):
and they're really functional.
However, when we're thinkingabout the chronic pain of the
world or humanity, when we justtake that acute let's fix it,
energy, the sink is broken,let's fix it. That's a different
scale that we're working with,and it's also has a different
(02:47):
seed that we're working with. Isa different way that we're being
called to interact with thatit's understandable the impulse
that we have to fix. And as aculture, we don't understand or
value initiations as a culture.
We don't understand or valuedeath cycles. We don't
(03:08):
understand or value discomfort.
And we are in a massive humanchapter right now that asks us
to become skillful with theseespecially if we think of
ourselves as a leader or acreative or a visionary or a
healer, someone who feels likethey have something of service
(03:30):
to offer to the world and be tothe world. And I'm looking
around, and people are justdroning out and distracting out
all over the place, and othersare just efforting harder at
what they already know how todo, which is push hard in the
external world. And the impulsethat we have to be of service is
(03:52):
great, and there is somethingmore nuanced here, in the energy
that is different from justfixing let's not conflate those
because they're different. Mostpeople are running their energy
and their life in such a waythat they are avoiding some key
understandings. Most people whowant to be of service are
running their energy in a waythat actually keeps them from
(04:14):
accomplishing the very thingthat they want, and it's because
they don't have the spiritualtools or relationships or
understandings that they needthey have not been initiated
into a deeper place of seatedmagical power. And when I refer
to magic, I'm not talking aboutlike Disney movies, bibbity,
boppity boo. I'm talking aboutthe actual path of magic. And so
(04:41):
we want to be of service, and wego about trying to, quote, fix
the world, fix humanity, solveall the problems. And what's at
the bottom of this often istruly that we don't want to be
in pain at the world's pain.
That's often really what'struthfully underneath this. Uh,
underneath is not the awareness,the embodiment, to truly be in
(05:03):
compassion, to truly be ofservice. Yet we're operating on
an engine that's really justtrying to fix the world so that
we don't have to be in pain atthe world's pain. So we go about
looking around at externalmaterial reality to see what we
can fix, how we can arrange thefurniture in the world's house
so that we can make the fear goaway, or talk ourselves out of
(05:26):
feeling guilty. And we wish,hope, think, pray, that all of
our furniture rearranging willbe enough to make a difference.
And on a subtle, energeticlevel, most people are doing
this so that they can feelabsolved of the guilt that they
have for being here, or theguilt that they have for, quote,
being a part of the problem, orthe guilt that they have this
(05:47):
deeper than that, guilt forbeing on the planet, on a subtle
level we're trying to fix sothat we can also be absolved of
the guilt we have for having abeautiful life, or send their
privilege, whatever you want tocall it. So on a subtle level,
we're trying to fix the world sothat we don't have to feel our
own limitation or face our ownpain or grief we're fixing so
(06:10):
that we don't have to deal witha deeper wound, which is often
I'm not sure that I belong hereor what I'm doing here, and then
after we've done a full realityboxing round of fixing, and
we've burned ourselves out orleft distraught and frustrated
(06:31):
and more alone and maybe alittle hopeless, when fixing
inevitably does not succeed, itbecomes a wound That feeds blame
and feeling ashamed andworthless and powerless and not
belonging on the planet. Side.
Quick note, most nonprofits arerunning on this energy stream.
So for those of you who have runa nonprofit or worked for one,
(06:54):
you might recognize this dynamicin real time. And for a lot of
people, it's running on themicro on an individual level.
You know how, if you haveexperience in that world, you
know how life sucking, it canbe, and this energetic current
is often why, because it'srunning the program like, if I
don't succeed in fixing then Iam like, ashamed, guilty,
(07:14):
worthless, powerless. I don'tbelong here anymore. My
existence is a problem thatwould not be said, probably out
loud. Most people in this pooldon't have the language to
articulate that, but someversion of this program is often
what's running, and the fixinginevitably doesn't work, right?
We keep doing it, though,because for most people, it's
(07:34):
the only strategy that we know.
So they're like, Well, I triedto fix it and I can't, but I
can't just sit back and donothing. And it feeds this crazy
reality that I see all the time,where, instead of an embodied,
real gratitude at the unlikelymiracle of being alive today,
people are shrouded and weigheddown by guilt, people who have
(07:57):
already hit the human jackpot,people who are privileged and
the most traditionally educatedand by the world standards, the
most resourced people in theworld are walking around guilt
ridden and depressed and angryand entitled and disillusioned.
If you're listening to this, youprobably have more resources at
(08:17):
your fingertips than you knowwhat to do with which program
should I take? Just think of howyou feel standing in the shampoo
aisle at the drug store or thegrocery store. That's your life
on some level. You can walkoutside right now and probably
aren't worried about gettingbombed on the way to the doctor.
What an incredible blessing. Andyet everybody is fucking
(08:38):
miserable and ungrateful, andyou ask them how they're doing
with their incredibly stockedlife, and they're like, Oh, I
could hardly get out of bedtoday. That pointed something
much deeper. I'm not saying thisto make you feel guilty if this
fits into how you're feelingright now. I'm just trying to
illustrate it to create somemore awareness so that you can
(09:00):
work with it, and we can startto work on it as a collective.
We have this unconscious beliefthat if we're not miserable,
we're not helping. If we're notmad, we're not paying attention.
If you're not dysregulated outof your mind, you must not care
about the world. And that'sbullshit. It's not true. It's a
story that's made up by peoplewho don't have the capacity to
understand another way. And it'sa story made up by people who
(09:23):
are disconnected from their ownenergy, from embodiment, from
source, from magic. And it'ssuch a common story that we hook
up on without questioning it.
Most people are. We're runningon this story in some way, and
we don't even question it. Mytake is that gratitude is an
(09:45):
outcome of healing, and it'salso a practice, and all of
those things that you feelguilty about need to become
things that you're incrediblygrateful for, which is not going
to happen just by me sayingthis, right, we're not going to
perform gratitude. And. 10, butit's really an invitation to
embark on an actual embodied,spiritual devotional path, where
(10:07):
you get to the reality that thisis so obvious and real to you
that you become magic.
In my personal opinion, whichyou don't have to agree with.
Obviously, those of us who havethese resourced material lives,
especially compared to mostpeople on the planet, we have a
(10:28):
spiritual responsibility tohumanity and to consciousness
and to life. We have aresponsibility to use our energy
to do the great work and to healon a deep level, to recall our
projections, to alchemize ourshit on behalf of the world,
because we can, because we dohave the time, we do have the
(10:50):
bandwidth and the practice to doit. We may not want to, and
that's something also we canwork on. But in my opinion, that
is our responsibility. We saidyes to this mission, and we can
get grateful that life hasprovided us with the opportunity
to say yes to doing this greatwork in real time. This is a
(11:11):
spiritual path, and it isspiritual work, and when I look
around, I don't see a lot ofpeople making time for it,
because they're too busy. Quote,helping and fixing this
embodiment is the pathway forall change. We want to master
and fix the world, but mostpeople are unwilling to embark
(11:33):
on a great work or of thespiritual path. And I find that
interesting. How is the worldeven hear what's holding it up,
the new earth, or the sense thata more beautiful future is
possible is hovering right now.
And a lot of you sensitivepeople out there can feel it.
You can feel this frequencyhovering and wanting to come in,
(11:56):
but what wants to come intoEarth gets born in through your
embodiment, through yourawareness, through your
presence, your creations, whichcan also include your children.
If you aren't embodying it, itain't coming in. So rearranging
all the external world furniturewe want if there's no true
(12:20):
spirit embodiment behind it atthat point, it's just giving you
something to do. It's being adistraction. Let me say this
differently, your capacity, yourprowess, to embody the beauty of
the New Earth is more importantthan all the things that you are
doing. Said another way, yourdevotion and your spiritual
(12:42):
commitments to being in thislife, in this world right now
are the most important thing youcan do. So if you're feeling
defeated and burned out andtired and guilty and afraid and
powerless and just completelyoverburdened by this chapter of
the story of the world thatwe're in. It's time to reorient
and redefine where your truepower comes from. It's time to
(13:04):
reorient to the level of yourown actual coherence between
your infinite self your timebased self. It's time to assess
your relationship to spirit andwhat you're doing on earth here
with it. And most peoplelistening to this, not all of
you, and that's not wrong. Noone's right or wrong here. But
(13:26):
most people listening to thiswere born with this sense that
you've got a mission, likethere's something, maybe
something big, that you feellike you're here to do or be you
have a sense that there's thisvocation or this calling,
something that sits inside ofyou and on your back, like
something you're here torealize, to make real. Not
everyone feels this, and it isthis diamond, this seed, that is
(13:48):
behind your ambition and yourdrive to succeed and to be of
service. And that's a beautifulthing, but that means we have to
become skillful with the spiritembodiment in a really, real
way, in a very timely way. Iwould also add, and I can
promise you, that the thing youfeel called to be is not a
(14:10):
burned out and bitter nonprofitdirector or impoverished
business owner. So if that'sbeing the wall that you're
hitting up against is trying totie, it's time to try something
new and get back to what isbehind matter, the MA behind
matter, because the big paradoxunderlying this particular life
(14:30):
lock is this, you have to becomesomebody before you become
nobody. Ram Dass said that, Ithink it's the easiest, most
succinct way to talk about whatI'm talking about. You have to
become somebody before youbecome nobody. And all of the I
just want to be of service,people probably skipped the
(14:51):
become somebody part, and theywent right to I can be nobody. I
can be nobody. And so being ofservice. Is conflated with
collapsing, fawning, being superco dependent with God and
reality and outsourcing yourcenter, and it's keeping you
from loving and enjoying yourlife, and it's keeping you also
energetically from being fullyon the planet. And then all of
(15:13):
the people who are really goodat being somebody you know,
those directors who are great atrearranging the furniture of the
world, but at some point it'snot going to be enough. And if
you're at the I'm a somebodystage, you get to lean into the
nobody stage, which is thisexquisite point of true magical
manifestation. Both of theseneed each other. Somebody needs
(15:35):
Nobody. Nobody needs somebody.
Both of these need each other.
Both of these kinds of peopleneed each other, and also both
of us need the opposite,embodied in ourselves. We don't
heal in isolation. We don't healat a pole. We heal in the
magical paradox of the third. Weheal in relationship, and we
(15:55):
heal with spirit. We arespiritual beings having a human
experience. Lest we forget, youhave to become an embodied self
full thing before you cancoherently lay that down in
service and experience thefreedom and the bliss of true
service. You trying to be ofservice because secretly,
(16:17):
underneath you feel guilty andlike you don't deserve to be
here. That's not service. That'syou trying to medicate with your
behavior. And you're not foolingenergy. It's not you can't fool
that. You can't hide that on anenergetic level. It's running
honestly truth. Will see that,and once you master your
medicine and come away from yourpole into the magic alchemy of
(16:41):
that third space when you learnto do both somebody and nobody
at the same time. It becomesthis infinity loop running in
your relationships, your life,your work, and it also becomes a
great conversation you are doingwith life, somebody, nobody,
somebody, nobody. This paradoxhere is probably why, if you've
(17:08):
hit like a stall in yourbusiness, if your creations
don't feel like they have thesparkle, if you feel like your
mission is not moving, or likeyour creativity is stagnant, or
your relationship is just okay,this is probably what's
underneath it, or it's why allthe furniture is moving around,
(17:28):
but you're still frustrated,angry and resentful at the
world, and plagued by a senseof, I'm not doing enough. And
the truth is, it's who you befirst, not what you do, and most
people are just wedding anddoing because culturally, that's
what we can see. We've lost ourskill as a culture and a society
(17:51):
in the urban west to even noticewho we be, but it matters how
you touch the world, the qualitywith which your spirit is in the
world. Touching the world, itmatters more than anything else,
and this requires more masteryand attention in your life than
(18:15):
anything else. And I'm nottalking about how you touch the
world, as in, like, Oh, I'mtouching the world. How small
can I make my carbon footprint?
That's not the conversation. Besomebody. Yes, your life costs
something to be here. Lifewanted you here badly enough
that it's got the cost of yourlife in the blueprint, because
(18:36):
you are here. And life is not amistake. It matters how you
presence in the world more thananything else. So your guilt,
your shame, your powerlessness,your fear, your anger, your
resentment, bitterness. It's notsome private thing that you're
hiding. It's not it is somethingthat you're contributing to the
collective, and magically,compassionately, it can become
(19:02):
something that you heal and youmetabolize and free. On behalf
of the collective,Yeshua said, when you bring
forth that within you, then thatwill save you. When you make the
inner like the outer, then youwill enter the kingdom. The
(19:27):
first class I'm teaching insideof the MA membership, and I'm
teaching it live is an immersionon sort of Yeshua wisdom drops,
and in May we'll tension thatwith the wisdom of the whore and
the holy woman. And these twosayings in particular, are a
(19:49):
couple of codes that we'll beplaying with, and they're from
the Gospel of Thomas, which wasone of the books not included in
the Bible and dug up. The desertin 1947 but this code, when you
bring forth that within you,then that will save you. Yeshua
is code your inner landscape iswhat manifests in your presence,
(20:10):
is what people experience inyour presence, is what life gets
from your presence. So don'tautomatically take this as like
punishment or guilt tripping,you know? Oh, now I have to be
even more perfect and control mypresence even more and yet
another bad thing about me thatI'm doing wrong that's not the
real journey. That's yourwounded inner child. The real
(20:32):
journey is you got to get sodown with receiving inhuman,
godly amounts of grace andunconditional love that you
become the good that happens tothe world, not you do the good
that happens to the world. Youbecome the good that happens to
the world. That is the only waythis profound alchemical journey
(20:54):
is the way the inner becomes theouter, which becomes the inner,
which becomes the outer. All thedoing, all the drive, has to
become the elixir of your beingthat you drink daily. The elixir
that who you are is the medicineyou are the medicine. You are
(21:17):
the wand for the magic. You arethe lightning rod for what wants
to come down. You are theelixir. What does it taste like
when the thirsty come for adrink at your fountain? Who you
be? This is what we're making,an apologetic space for inside
(21:40):
of Ma the externals in your lifepull on you naturally, and this
inner outer world building isthe great work of magic. And all
all chemical paths, who we be isthe thing that we tend to de
prioritize and don't make spacefor. But if we're going to get
really honest and reallycoherent and truly be the full
(22:02):
humanity, this is the mostimportant thing. So you not only
impact life, but you also loveand enjoy your life. So Ma, the
membership, it's emerging, andit weaves together the medicines
of this moment. And it's forthose of you who are ready to
(22:25):
make peace with what is you'reready to love and enjoy your
existence and impact materialreality. And I'm considering it
a sanctuary for this kind ofwork, for building this wild,
erotic bridge between yourregular, mundane life, your
devotion in the world at large,that inner and all the layers of
(22:48):
the outer. This bridge is not aheavy laden backpack filled with
guilt and all the things thatyou have to do to be a good
person. It's quite the oppositeof that. It is becoming the
light of true presence, theseed, the diamond that you
already have. Her bridge islight, and it's surrendered, and
it's like the self laying downfor the beloved. It's got the
(23:11):
heart wide open, and it's turnedon for the road ahead. We can't
do this Great Alchemy alone. Wedon't heal in isolation.
Unfortunately, that would be so.
There are many times in my lifewhere I wish I could but MA in
the form of a membership, is acommitment to embodying these
(23:31):
transmissions and being asupport for their coming to
earth, these medicines ofChrist, consciousness, the
sacred feminine and alchemy,which is the art and the
spiritual skills oftransformation. So the day that
this episode is live in realtime, I am in the middle of
launching this membership at afounder rate, which is going to
(23:52):
be the cheapest rate that Ma isever available. So we want to
welcome you in and make it aneasy yes for you at this stage.
So if you're listening to thisbefore Wednesday, February 19,
2025 the doors are open, and youcan click the link in the show
notes to learn more, or you canjust go ahead and sign up if
you're listening to this in thefuture, after February 19, 2025
(24:17):
there is also a link in the shownotes to join the wait list, so
that, if you just want to be inthe know, you want to learn more
about it, the next time thedoors are open, you can have
access to that information tomake an aligned decision for you
at this time, I hope you take adeep breath. I hope you become
more aware of your presence, andyou go outside today and you sit
(24:40):
down if you're not driving rightnow, perhaps even now, close
your eyes. Lean back a littlebit, take your attention to. The
(25:01):
space behind your sternum, rightin the center of your chest,
and think of something that youfeel truly grateful for, no
pretend ease, no pretendingsomething you can honestly say,
(25:23):
I feel deep gratitude for this.
And if you can't think ofanything, then you can sit in
presence with that vulnerabilityand the openness to be willing
to hold gratitude and just letthat sensation of gratitude.
Maybe you're seeing it as acolor. Maybe you're feeling it
as an actual feeling or asensation in your physical body.
(25:45):
Let it fill up that space in thecenter of your chest. Let it
spill out into the rest of yourshoulders that come up your
collarbone and your throat andspill down your arms, all the
way down to your fingertips, andfilling up your belly and your
pelvis and your back, down yourlegs, filling up the 3d of your
(26:11):
body all the sides, all the wayup your neck, filling up your
face and behind your eyes andbehind your palate, all the
spaces of your head and yourbrain and your skull. Just take
a couple more deep breaths andreally feel the embodiment of
(26:36):
that. Or again, if you don'tauthentically connect with a
sensation or image of gratituderight now, feel the openness to
it, or the willingness thedesire to embody it,
(26:57):
and take one more full deepbreath here, keeping this in
your awareness, and as you openyour eyes, play with how long
can I hold this in my body as Icontinue to move about my day,
as I drive? Notice when itleaves. Notice if you can bring
(27:19):
it back. Peace. Be well.
Thank you so much for listening.
If you enjoyed the episode,please take a few moments to
(27:40):
subscribe to the show leave us areview and share the episode.
These small tasks help ourindependent podcast so much. Be
sure to also check out the shownotes below to learn more about
any resources, guests orsponsors that we shared with you
today. Our intro and outro musicwas created by artists Aaron
palavic and Jared Kelly. Ourpodcast logo was created by
(28:02):
Elaine Stevenson, and this showis produced by softer sound
studio. Thank you for beinghere. Be well. Peace. You
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