One thing we know about murder is that people will work with what they’ve got! It’s not all guns and knives, sometimes seemingly harmless everyday objects can be turned into a murder weapon. But unconventional weapons does add a layer of mystery and confusion to a case. And in some cases, inevitable puns and jokester headlines. But it’s not all shits and giggles…
After today, you’ll never look at that piece of stale bread in your kitchen with the same eyes 👀. And your toilet seat? Watch that sneaky little biatch.
Brandon is kicking us off with a story titled “Porcelain Rage.” Which immediately brings a porcelain doll to mind (cue those creepy ass stories of baby dolls killing people in their sleep), but it’s actually the porcelain you find in the bathroom. Christina Eubanks, a 28 year old woman from Tennessee, was suddenly targeted by her pizza guy/drug dealer. You might initially laugh at the fact that it was a toilet seat murder, but this is a gruesome story. Ultimately, it’s not funny at all and viewer discretion is advised.
Kevin’s story on the other hand is the subject of laughs purely because we know so little about it that it’s borderline ridiculous. Reginald Hemsley-Doddingdale, a man with the most British name you’ve ever heard, was killed by a stale load of Pumperknickle bread. The translation of Pumperknickle? The Devil’s Fart. This man was killed…by the devil’s fart.
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