88: When Expectations Die With Them 08.08.25

Hey, Dear Listener,

A quick heads- up before we begin:
Today's episode involves the death of a parent. If you're navigating any kind of loss--whether someone is truly gone or just no longer who they were before--take care of yourself as you listen. 

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In this episode of Honestly, Dear Listener, we’re talking about what happens to all the expectations we carry once the person who placed them on us is no longer here. Emily shares about the recent passing of her dad—her childhood best friend and fiercest cheerleader—and how his absence has unexpectedly reshaped her relationship to music, identity, and pressure.

We explore how parents pass down not just values, but scripts—and how, in their absence, we’re sometimes left wondering who we really are.

Whether you’ve lost a parent or are simply renegotiating the story you’ve been handed, we hope this episode meets you where you are.

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References:

• As I Lay Dying - novel by William Faulkner
  

TIMECODES
0:00 - Intro
2:38 - Creatives & Overthinking
4:39 - “My dad died.”
10:48 - “I’m living his dream.”
12:26 - Grieving someone while they’re still alive
22:48 - Expectations- “Who am I if my parents are gone?”
25:55 - What Emily’s noticing about expectations/her identity now that her dad is gone
30:00 - An irreverent chat about cremation
40:27 - Grief