August 28, 2025 • 50 mins
What happens when you lose everything and have nowhere to go but up? Louise Colyer knows that journey intimately. In this profound conversation, Louise reveals how she transformed her life after simultaneously losing her family, home, businesses, and health.
The turning point wasn't dramatic – it began with simply brushing her teeth after months of depression. This small act of self-care sparked a journey that would see Louise lose 52kg, reverse her eating disorders, and build a thriving coaching business helping others develop genuine confidence.
Louise's approach to transformation is refreshingly honest and practical. Rather than focusing on external goals or validation, she guides clients to develop self-love and intuition about what truly makes them feel good. "I get people to literally love themselves and want to do it for themselves, not just for what they look like," she explains. Her holistic method examines spiritual journeys, exercise routines, nutrition, emotional intelligence, and thought patterns to create lasting change.
What makes this episode particularly powerful is Louise's vulnerability about her own struggles. From being bullied as a mixed-race child to feeling like the "black sheep" throughout her life, she shares how these experiences informed her understanding of confidence. Her insights on handling fear by questioning negative thoughts with evidence-based reality checks offer listeners practical tools they can apply immediately.
Louise's story is living proof that transformation doesn't require dramatic interventions or perfect circumstances. It requires consistent small steps, self-compassion, and the courage to listen to your intuition even when it goes against the crowd. Whether you're facing your own rock bottom or simply wanting to build more authentic confidence, this conversation offers both inspiration and actionable wisdom for your journey.
Louise's book recommendation: "You Are A Magnet" by Amber Lyons
More about Louise:
Louise has a powerful passion for helping people regain their confidence and love for themselves—because she’s lived through the journey herself.
After experiencing deep personal trauma and adversity, she rebuilt her life from the inside out. Through fitness, mindset shifts, and emotional mastery, Louise transformed her pain into purpose.
Today, she empowers others to rise from their own struggles, guiding them to rediscover their self-worth, rebuild their confidence, and truly love who they are—mentally, emotionally, and physically.
https://www.instagram.com/louiseculyer/
House of JerMar: houseofjermar.com
Empowerment Fundamentals Course: https://members.houseofjermar.com/empowerment-course
Instagram: instagram.com/houseofjermar/
YouTube Channel: youtube.com/@Houseofjermar
Read Jeanne's Book: Two Feet In: Lessons From an All-In Life
WELCOME TO OUR HOUSE!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
A lot of times people look at people on the outside,
especially through social media,and it seems like they have it
all together and the distancefrom where they are to where
they want to go is so huge.
And I know you as a coach.
You really help people withlike the steps, Like it's a
process.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
And I always say that they're always waiting for them
.
But why do you have to wait tobe happy, like I reckon right
now?
If I waited for something else,it was one day I dreamed of
having this life.
So why am I like, do you know?
I mean, enjoy it while you'rehere, whilst you're still
working to progress, but I thinkpeople are always focusing on
the next thing.
They never sit back andactually take in what they've
actually got right now.
(00:37):
Yeah, that's a big thing.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Welcome to the House of Jerm podcast where wellness
starts within.
The House of Germar is alifestyle brand, empowering
women to live all in throughinterior design and personal
wellness.
We are a destination for womenready to reimagine what is
possible in their homes andlives and then create it.
(01:00):
We are honored to have you joinus on our mission to empower 1
million women to live all in.
I am your host, jean Collins,and I invite you to become
inspired by this week's guest.
Welcome to the House of Germarpodcast, where wellness starts
within.
I'm your host, jean Collins,and today we are going to talk
(01:21):
about confidence.
I am so excited for thisbeautiful soul who is my guest
today Louise Collier.
She's coming.
All the confidence.
I am so excited for thisbeautiful soul who is my guest
today Louise Collier.
She's coming all the way.
I'm in Connecticut, she's inthe UK.
I screwed up the first time wewere supposed to record, which
is totally my fault, and she isjust such an amazingly beautiful
soul and I had the greatesttime talking to her when we did
(01:42):
our pre-call.
So I am so excited to bring toyou guys her story, everything
that she is doing.
When I say she is just a badassindividual, she is, and just
has, a heart of gold.
So, louise, thank you forjoining us from all the way over
in the UK.
Hello.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Thank you for having me.
It's such a pleasure.
Honestly, thanks for having me.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
You are welcome.
I am so excited to share yourstory and I will just give a
caveat to everybody.
If you know, we don't know howthis recording is going to go,
so we're going to give it ourbest shot here and you know, we
might break up and have to startagain, which is fine, it's all
good.
This is real life.
But her story is so importantthat it is worth trying to bring
it to you.
And she is traveling, so she'snot even in her home, so I have
(02:26):
not afforded her the luxury ofher being in her own home.
She's traveling, so we're goingto talk about that too, and I
appreciate her making time whileshe is traveling.
So, to get started, your storyis wow, so wow.
Would you mind sharing a littlebit about your background that
has gotten you to where you aretoday?
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Okay, I don't actually know where to start
because there's so many elements.
So if you start from, like whenI was very, very young, I never
really fit in.
I was bullied for being mixedrace, I was different out of the
family, I never really had likeany identity and I used to grow
up really really quickly,quickly, and this kind of
followed me through my life,through like my marriage.
(03:07):
Um, I married into a Mauritianfamily, so again, I was kind of
like the black sheep out of thefamily and a lot of bullying was
happening, not just in that,but like in childhood and
everything.
And the point where life gotreally really tough, the point
where at the same time I lostall, all my family, like my mom,
my dad, my brother, my husband,my dog, my home, my businesses,
(03:31):
a baby, all at the same time.
And then we went into COVID andat this point I was really
unhappy.
I was actually a size 24, veryoverweight.
I really hated myself.
I was like I just couldn'tstand anything and at that point
I didn't have anything exceptmyself being unhealthy.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
That is a serious low .
You losing everything is aserious low.
So our listeners might not beat a low that's quite as low as
yours was.
However, you were able to comeout of your low, so what?
And it's COVID which is a lowfor everybody.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Yeah, exactly, so you have the double low.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
So what did you do?
What were the first steps thatyou started to take to come out
of this incredible low?
Speaker 2 (04:18):
I always say there wasn't something dramatic that
actually happened to me to makeme like, okay, I want to change
this around.
It was very gradual, so like Ididn't need like when I actually
I found like a room and Istayed.
Eventually I stayed in a roomand it was like this moldy room.
Um, I was, I didn't leave thehouse for like three, four
months but eventually one of myfriends was texting me all the
(04:38):
time saying, get up, get a wash,doing like basic things.
And just one day I listened andthen just like this is going to
sound disgusting, but I brushedmy teeth and I had a wash and I
just felt better.
And then from there I startedlike introducing like 10 minutes
of exercise here, there andeverywhere and that, just that,
just like focusing on myself andrealizing me doing something
for myself, because obviouslyfor my whole life I'd looked
(05:00):
after other people.
I never knew who I did.
My whole life was dedicated toother people.
This was the first time I'dactually done something to make
me feel better and it kind oflike I grew a lot of self-love,
a lot of self-confidence overthe years from just that point
where I was like, oh my God,that wash has actually made me
feel fresh without realizing,going from that Like I feel a
(05:21):
bit fresh now, like I actuallyfeel good without having all of
these people and having all ofthat.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
So it was just the simplest of thing that started
it.
Obviously it wasn't just that,yep, but you're not the first
guest I've had on that has saidthat.
I had another guest on duringseason one who was also, you
know, very overweight and wasoverweight and had a drinking
problem and was at a very lowpoint and she said hers started
with taking a vitamin and thenher next step was having a face
(05:54):
routine, washing her face.
And it sounds so simple.
Yet at the same time, whenyou're in that low, the act of
doing something for yourself, assmall as that is and as simple
as that is, can be what startsyou onto an entire journey of
personal wellness.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
Honestly, the change in just having a wash I don't
know, that sounds crazy isamazing.
So this is why, with like anappliance or anybody, I
recommend what can you do rightnow, Like you don't have to look
for anything significant.
Now there is something that youcan do to lift yourself up
immediately.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Which is a really important point because we are,
we live in a society.
That's like I will be happywhen I will feel better about
myself, when I will go to thegym and exercise, when this
happens and when a lot of timespeople look at people on the
outside, especially throughsocial media, and it seems like
they have it all together andthe distance from where they are
to where they want to go is sohuge.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
Yeah, and I know you as a coach.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
You really help people with like the steps, like
it's a process.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
And I always say that they're always waiting for them
.
But why do you have to wait tobe happy, like I reckon right
now?
But if I waited for somethingelse, it was one day I dreamed
of having this life.
So why am I like, do you know?
I mean, enjoy it while you'rehere, whilst you're still
working to progress.
But I think people are alwaysfocusing on the next thing.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
So talk to me about exercise, because you've lost a
ton of weight.
How did that happen?
Speaker 2 (07:22):
like I said, started very, very small in this like
moldy room 10 minutes, 10, 20minutes started there and then I
started.
So I previously I was in thearmy, I used to box.
I used to be very, veryathletically fit but then,
through like mental health andeverything, I did gain a lot of
weight and so I was completelyopposite to what I used to be.
(07:43):
But every single time I gotlike athletically fit.
Last time it was because of anexternal thing, it was because I
wanted to look good or I hadlike a boxing match or I had
something to actually worktowards.
So this time it was like losingCOVID and I was like I've got
nothing, I can't do any of them,it's just literally for me.
So I started just doing exercisein my room when the gym started
to um open.
(08:04):
I just started going to the gym, started eating healthier,
starting doing little things,and it wasn't because I used to
suffer with um eating disorders,even from a child, like I used
to have like binge eatingdisorder.
I used to like hide food, soI'd go from one end of the
spectrum to the other so like Ididn't eat next to nothing or
I'd eat absolutely everything.
So I've been really, reallythin.
I don't like saying skinny, butlike not very big.
(08:26):
I've been very small and I'vebeen very, very big from each
spectrum, but this is the firsttime I learned how to use my
intuition about how my bodyfeels, what was good for me,
what wasn't good for me, and eatfrom that.
And I just lost weight becauseI started to love myself and I
wanted to exercise.
And I think there's a massivedifference from doing it from an
external goal to actuallywanting to feel good or wanting
(08:49):
to just be healthy and just havea better life for yourself,
whereas all the other times Itrained or anything, it was just
because I wanted to look goodor I had a boxing mat or a run
or something.
So it wasn't.
Until I lost my whole identityand I was learning how to love
myself, I was like, oh my god,exercise is actually really good
for me, these foods are goodfor me, and then that's how I
naturally lost like 52 kgwithout and I reversed, like, my
(09:11):
eating disorder.
So like, obviously, like,sometimes I get a little bit of
triggers but you work throughthem and it's a really good
thing because I never I wasn'taware of that in the past I just
thought this is what I do, butnow I'm so aware of what I'm
doing, I just love how it makesme feel, and I think learning to
love how you feel because youdeserve it, that's what changed
me and that's why I loveexercise more than what I used
(09:33):
to.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
So I have a question and I don't know what the answer
is going to be to this question, but as I'm listening to you
talk, I can visualize the youback then, right, the overweight
.
I've lost everything.
You don't have a lot of selfconfidence.
Trying to find that self loveis so difficult.
So when you were that personand you looked in the mirror at
(09:55):
yourself, what did you see?
Speaker 2 (09:57):
That's a really difficult question because I
don't think I actually did seemyself, because from a young age
I was always like looking afterlike my mum, or I was looking
after my brother.
As I grew up, I always hadsomething else to focus on.
I don't think I ever focused iton me.
So when I did look in themirror I think I don't actually
(10:17):
know it was someone completelydifferent.
So I straightened my hair forthe first time last year or was
it this year, something likethat and I literally looked in
the mirror and first time Ihaven't straightened my hair
since before Covid or then Covidtimes when I'd lost everything
and I literally cried because Ididn't recognize that person,
and so that was the first time Istraightened it from them.
(10:38):
So I don't actually rememberwhat I seen.
I just remember how I felt.
I just remember hiding andcrying because I never fit into
my clothes on my birthday andstuff like that, but I don't
actually remember what I seen.
But when I seen that girl inthe mirror when I straightened
my hair, I didn't like it.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
It brought back those memories, yeah, so.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
I'm not going to straighten my hair.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
So when did you learn about confidence?
Did you know at the time thatyou didn't have a lot of
self-confidence and that you hadto figure out how to build that
?
Or did confidence come later?
Speaker 2 (11:11):
No, I actually generally thought I was
confident.
I thought I was shy because Iwas never able to speak to more
than two people at a timewithout sweating and stuff.
I thought I was generally shy.
So I thought there was someareas where I didn't have
confidence and but then I alwaysI knew.
I knew I had confidence toachieve things because I came
from literally nothing.
But then they told me to quituni to be a teacher.
(11:32):
But I was like I'm going to dothis.
So like, deep down I was likeI'm still going to do it.
So like I still managed to doit.
Like people saying, are you notgoing to earn a lot?
So I built a businesses, I didthings.
I always had the confidencethat I could do it.
But when it actually came outand looked like I didn't have
confidence and so I think it wasmore of a battle inside.
Deep down I've always had it inme which I didn't know because
(11:54):
I wouldn't have been able toachieve what I had.
But then I had to learn how toreally really know that I was
confident.
It was just some sort offriction inside of me that I
didn't even know.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
Yeah, and you had to work through that.
Yeah, how did you do that?
Did you get help from otherpeople?
Books, podcast, like how do youdo?
Speaker 2 (12:15):
that, looking at my life on a bird's eye perspective
, like literally looking at,like my spiritual journey, my
exercise and what I'm puttinginto my body and emotional
intelligence, how am I reactingto things?
And looking and this is, do youknow, like your habits, your
positive habits and what you'reactually doing, I noticed how I
am actually a really positiveperson and seeing how I was
(12:37):
different, around differentpeople, in different areas,
certain things I could feel off.
And that's when I was noticingI was just like I'm only like
this in this area.
This isn't right for me and Ilearned why.
And then now, when I go intothese certain environments or
around these people, I know howto handle it, whereas before I
was just like I didn'tunderstand what all these
feelings were.
I didn't understand why I feltlike that.
(12:59):
So I just saw it within me.
But I just didn't understandbecause I was, when you're
around certain things andgrowing up, quite different.
But I learned how to navigatethe emotions.
It was just literally lookingat what made me feel good and
just changing my perspective onthings.
So in my head of when you'vebeen told certain things from a
child, so you take that throughyour adulthood, so you have to
(13:20):
kind of like not reverse, butyour thoughts and your brain are
like a muscle.
So you have to kind of like notreverse, but your thoughts and
your brain are like a muscle.
So you have to kind of likesubconsciously change your
thoughts and work on yourthoughts.
It's just like a muscle.
So like I was noticing, likesitting back when I was with
people, the thoughts I washaving about myself possibly
wasn't even thinking that.
And this is where you have tochange your thought patterns.
(13:43):
Just as you would.
We all go to the toilet, weflush the toilet, we brush our
teeth every morning.
We have more habits and thoughtpatterns we have in our
subconscious mind than we do inreal life, but nobody actually
becomes aware of them.
So I've really gone into thesubconscious and like what am I
telling myself every single day?
Because that's what I'mlistening to the most Did you
(14:03):
meditate?
Speaker 1 (14:04):
Is that part of your practice?
Speaker 2 (14:06):
Yeah, I meditate every day.
I do journal, but I don'tjournal, so like I like writing
some positive thoughts, so like,if I'm having, I like to like.
I don't really like journalingas such.
I like to like positive thingsthat have happened in the day.
What's going to happen tomorrow?
Walking I literally lovewalking First thing in the
(14:29):
morning.
I will either go for a walk orI'll go straight to the gym.
I always set off my day withoutspeaking to anybody else and
doing something for myself forthe first hour and and just,
yeah, making sure I surroundmyself with like-minded people.
I think your environment reallymakes a massive difference.
So, like I've said, I've justleft my own home.
So like people are saying, oh,you can come, stay here.
But there's been times I'm likeno, it's okay, I've chose
somewhere where I feel like theenvironment's nice for me and
(14:50):
even though there's not muchspace but the people are lovely,
like the energy is nice it's.
You've got to be really carefuland you've got to be able to
have confidence.
If it's not the right energyfor you, you have to walk away
from it, no matter theconsequences, because that's
what's going to hold you backand then you become a part of
that yeah all, so true.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Wow.
So how did your business start?
Did it start from exercise?
How did it start when?
Speaker 2 (15:15):
I started to love exercise because what it was
doing for me, rather than what Iwas starting to look like, like
how it was changing my life andthe perspective I was having on
life.
I was like, right, I can help,I knew I was going to change.
I was starting to look likelike how it was changing my life
and the perspective I washaving on life.
I was like, right, I can help,I knew I was going to change.
I was actually a dentistryteacher at that time, was in
COVID and I was like thisdoesn't feel right.
I know I'm going to be doingsomething different and I
(15:37):
thought it was either going tobe helping people or animals.
I started doing my PT and and Iliterally loved it.
But then I the way I learned tolove exercise was I started to
(15:59):
lose weight because I love doingit for myself, whereas notice,
when I was a PT which I am stilla PT you can easily give
someone a program.
Easily, you can look at somebody, give them a program, tell them
meal plan, whatever it is, butgetting somebody to want to do
it for themselves is acompletely different thing.
They will do it for a fewmonths, they might get bored and
they'll be like oh well, I'vegot into my dress now and it
will just be like, and it willjust go to the back burner.
(16:20):
I want people to want to lovethemselves enough, confident
enough that they can take itinto life.
So I did like psychology andhealth and fitness NLP I did.
I've done a few things thatlike help with like the brain
and all of these things.
So I get people to literallylove themselves and want to do
it for themselves, not just forwhat they look like and what
(16:41):
they think they should look like, rather than comparing
themselves on social media andstuff.
So getting people to want tochange their life for the better
for them.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
It's not just about the exercise and the nutrition.
You're doing the whole mind,body, spirit, soul connection.
It's not just about because weall know exercise.
Everyone knows exercise is goodfor you, everyone knows that
eating healthy is good for you.
We know these things.
I love that you focus so muchmore deeply on the why behind
why people do these things andreally getting them to change.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Yeah, and looking at it as a bird's eye perspective,
like, if you look, even ifsomebody goes to the gym five
times a week, that's only fivehours.
You've still got 165 hours ofthe week.
So I look at all of that aswell because like, yeah, you can
have a great time in the fivehours, but you can still be
really unhappy at home or inyour work or something like that
, which then has that negativeeffect.
Like, you want to balance itout.
(17:32):
If you're working well, itshould flow throughout your
whole life.
So I became like a life coachof doing my master's and doing
like there's just like it allcomes as one.
It's like a whole cycle.
You can't focus on one andeverything.
So, yeah, that's, exercise juststarts things.
You start to feel it, you startto look at things differently
because you're feeling better.
(17:52):
So that's how it started.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
And then it grew into this whole business.
So if someone asked you, youknow what do you do, how do you,
how do you describe what you do?
Speaker 2 (18:04):
This is really hard because it depends on what the
client is, but I literally helppeople believe in themselves,
give them the confidence throughwhatever that is.
I help them get whatever theywant aesthetically make them
feel healthier either put weighton, lose weight and make them
feel good.
Get them confident in whateverthey want to do in the gym.
I also like look at their lifeas a life coach and, as they
(18:26):
like help with their thoughtpatterns, nlp, like um,
subconsciously like, okay, we'reall living cycles.
They're like if they're sayingto me oh, I always do weight,
but then I always do this.
Okay, why do we always do that?
It goes back from somewhereelse.
There I do, I break cycles, Ibuild the confidence from what
they're already doing andeventually they are.
(18:46):
My clients are startingbusinesses.
They're losing weight, they'regetting, they're getting yeah,
yeah, they're getting a raise.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Promotion.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
They're getting all of these things as well as like
actually loving it, spending,like making time for the gym,
learning, like like theirchildren are following their
footsteps now, like they'remaking making, like it's just
absolutely amazing, like beforethey were they felt bad for
going to the gym because theyhad a child or they were always
tired from work or they didn'tthink they could have the
business, they couldn't havethis.
But but from doing tiny littlethings and just literally
(19:16):
looking, sitting back andlooking like their life and what
they've always been through,and like we just change it
completely.
Sometimes it takes, sometimesit can be quite quick, sometimes
it can be progressive,depending on the client, but
yeah, there's been massive lifechanges physically, mentally,
spiritually, in the not just theclient, the whole family, and
you can see how it's just like adomino effect.
(19:39):
They become more vibrant, thewhole family life becomes more
vibrant.
They're getting pay rises,businesses are opening.
It's just great and I feel sohappy, I feel honored.
So obviously I went through alot, but I'm not happy it
happened.
I'm so thankful it happenedbecause I've got all this life
(20:00):
experience so I can actuallyresonate with my clients when
they're going through something.
And whatever happened wouldn'thave led me to where I am now.
So I'm just honored that ithappened and it's opened so many
opportunities in my heart,because I know how it feels when
you're doing certain thingslike I just I get, just get so
happy, like it just makeseverything, everything you've
been through, it just makes itworth it, like I'm feeling
(20:22):
better.
But on top of that I'm makingso many other people feel better
as well, like if I can do it,coming like practically homeless
to where I am now and upliftingmy life.
I know they can do it and onceyou believe it, it happens, and
that's what happens with them.
They believe it and then youtake the action.
As soon as you believe inyourself, you're going to take
action.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Yeah, it snowballs, yes, and people need to go
follow you on Instagram becauseyou post so many inspiring,
inspirational things about howyou did go through this journey
and how you did transform, and Ilove that.
You are really a coach of lifeand trying to help people with
the bigger picture of life, andexercise and nutrition is part
(21:02):
of it and mindset is part of it.
It's it's, to me, is soimpactful that you have this
gift and I always say, as acoach, we learn so much from our
clients, like our clients alsoteach us, and it's such a gift
to be a coach because it's a twoway street.
You know, you get from them andyou see their growth and that
growth helps you grow as well asa coach.
(21:23):
So it is as you said it is agift to be able to do this for a
living.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Yeah, I was literally talking about that today,
actually talking about how, evenas a coach, we are still human.
So, like, we all have had likedays where you're like, oh,
could do with a lion today anddifferent stuff like this.
But then when it has been dayswhere my clients have actually
uplifted my day and I'm like, oh, it doesn't ground me, and I'm
like they've actually groundedme a few times when they've had
(21:47):
their wins or something likethat, and I'm like I literally
love this.
So it does actually work bothways.
When they're having a good day,I'm having a good day, it's
just amazing.
So you're kind of all in thesame boat.
So, yeah, I'm so thankful formy clients like, and because
they they trust me.
Like I went through a phase of,oh, my god, these clients trust
me with their life.
Because it's a very personalthing, isn't it?
(22:08):
The things they say to you andlike, especially as a PT, and
like, um, some of the traumathings that we might have to
uncover and things.
It's very personal and I justsit there like, did this person
like trust me?
They haven't even met me andI'm just like, yeah, I generally
feel honored and I'm like, whenI see them get the wins.
I think I get more emotionalbecause they don't actually.
(22:29):
Sometimes you don't rememberhow far you've gone, myself
included, until someone remindsyou and they're like, oh yeah,
and I get more emotional becausethey don't see themselves like
that, but I still see them likethat, so it's good.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
Yes, it's so powerful .
It's powerful.
So you have written two bookswhich we must discuss.
So you have written two books.
What made you decide you wantedto start to write and become an
author?
Speaker 2 (22:54):
so I didn't actually decide to write.
A lot of people were telling meso, like there's snippets in my
life where we haven't reallydiscussed, but there's like bits
of my life and everyone's likeyou should just write a book,
you should write a book.
And I was like, yeah, yeah,yeah, whatever.
And then I was like, yeah, Ijust let that go past.
But then, like I was just likedo you know what?
Because I noticed with mycoaching how much I was actually
helping people.
And so mum was like it actuallydid come across.
(23:18):
So I actually put across I wasgoing to write a book and I put
it on my vision board.
I had a mindset coach and then,before you know it, I'm having
an interview with this guycalled Marco and he was like
actually I was just putting myhouse up for sale, I was going
to go traveling and I was goingto write a book and all of this
stuff.
And then he was like actuallywe're looking for people that
have turned their life around,that want to help other people,
and we're doing a world booktour as well.
And I was just like I'veliterally just written that on
(23:44):
my vision board, like a fewweeks ago, and I was like, oh my
God, this is just like otherpeople telling me to do this.
So that's the first book sowhere it's like a little bit of
my life, like there's so manyamazing other co-authors that
I'm writing with have had likesimilar experiences or
completely different experienceswhere they've had an experience
in life where they've had toturn their life around.
So that's what that one is, andso it's just that book's more
(24:06):
motivational.
If we can do it, you can do it.
And then the second book thatI'm doing is a solo one by
myself.
It's an experience of likethankful that everything happens
and just like all the stepsI've taken to literally turn my
life around from literallynothing like mentally,
physically, financially,spiritually, absolutely
(24:27):
everything, and steps on how youcan flip that around, where to
go and how to move up.
Really.
So it's more of a guide, butthrough my own experiences
qualifications.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
It's giving your coaching experience to a much
broader audience.
Yeah, exactly is what it's,what it's doing, which is
incredible.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
It's like what I'm providing to my clients now, but
through a book.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Right, so you can reach a much broader audience by
doing that.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Yeah, yeah, which is really powerful.
Someone reads that book, it cansave their life.
It saved my life just by doingcertain things.
I've been in hospitals mentalhospitals I've been.
In all that.
I've saved my own life and Iknow that I can save so many
people's lives, that I've triedto save my own life and I know
that I can save so many people'slives physically and mentally.
So I used to be scared oftalking out about my personal
(25:18):
stuff, but now I'm like you knowwhat this can actually help so
many people.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
Yes, it can.
So you just mentioned the wordscared because I was going to
ask you how do you deal withfear?
Because there is fear when yougo to try something new, do
something new, start a newbusiness, write a book, all the
things that you're doing.
There can be a lot of fear, andthere also can be a lot of fear
around imposter syndrome, Likewhy does anyone care what I have
(25:42):
to say or what I've done?
So what do you personally do tohelp yourself battle those
fears?
Speaker 2 (25:49):
The first fear is just an emotion.
Every single emotion is goingto come and go.
I always do that.
Every single emotion is goingto come and go, but I always do
that and the emotion is alwaysattached to the thought.
The thought is something that'sprobably imposter syndrome I
can't do this, I can't do that.
So then I battle with that andlearn how to deal with the
emotion.
You either use it or you let itrun you.
So I use that emotion and putit into something good, either
(26:10):
gym, into my work, into goodthings, and then with the
thought processes, so like thisis going to fail.
Why would people want to listento me?
I always counterbalance it.
Is that actually true?
Why don't people want to listento me?
Has anybody told me they don'twant to listen to me?
Well, actually no, a lot ofpeople have told me they do want
to listen to me and I'mactually helping them.
(26:30):
So it's just like is that justmy head telling me that, or is
it somebody else physicallysaying that?
If I'm in subconsciously, Ialways say I can't do this, and
probably it comes out my mouthsometimes as well, but then I'll
look at like I've done so manyother things.
Why can't I do this?
Like you've proved yourselfwrong every single time.
So if you've got activethoughts, I literally just
(26:50):
counter like write them down.
It's as simple.
Like you can do it on the spot.
Like just write it down, isthat actually true?
Back it up with a fact and then, obviously, with the motion,
just understand this is just anemotion.
You've got through every otherbad day.
You've got through a lot worsethan this and just recognizing
anything that you do that is,the first rep is going to be
uncomfortable and but you've gotto love.
(27:12):
You've got to learn to lovethat, because that's where you
grow the most.
So if you don't do that, you'rejust going to stay in one place
.
So you kind of have to like useit.
Use it to your ability, likeyou kind of get used to it yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
So you mentioned a couple things I think are so
important.
It's like you have to be aware.
You have to be aware of thosethoughts, you have to question
whether they're based in factsor not, which I love.
I've had multiple guests comeon the show talking about you
know the facts behind the storythat we tell ourselves which is
so powerful, right?
So often our narrative is notactually based in fact if we
(27:48):
really challenge ourselves forthe facts.
And then you talked aboutemotion, which I love, because
I've also had lots of guestscome on the show talking about
the importance of feeling theemotion and working through the
emotion, and you made such agreat point about trying to take
that emotion and not stuff itdown, and find a way to
(28:08):
positively channel that emotionof fear.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Yeah, a massive thing .
And I think having some sort ofemotional intelligence is
always good as well, becausewhen you're in emotion,
sometimes you don't make theright decision.
So you've got to learn, whenyou are in emotion, to just like
sit back, use the emotion andput it into the right place,
rather than you can either useit for a positive thing or you
can do it for a reactive thing,so like say, if you were I don't
know't know for an example, youwas in an argument with a
(28:34):
partner or something you can'vegot the option.
You can either say somethingfrom the emotion that might go
backfire, or you can sit down,look at it, reflect and be like,
actually, what's that?
What am I actually learningfrom this?
And this is what I always tryand do.
If I'm feeling somethinguncomfortable, rather than
reacting, I'll be like, okay,what can I learn from this?
What's happening?
Am I, am I in too emotional?
Like what's going on?
So when you are feeling somesort of emotion, you don't like
(28:56):
it's perfect, like, okay, thisis time for me to learn
something, what I'm learningrather than react.
So learn and then react whenyou've literally looked at
yourself first.
Speaker 1 (29:07):
Right Take a pause look inward first.
Yes, Such good advice.
So what does a day in your lifelook like?
Speaker 2 (29:16):
I always start the day by myself, so I will either
be going if it's a rest day I'llbe going for a walk, like
literally in nature.
Sometimes I have a podcast on,sometimes I'll just be listening
to vinyl or being sort ofliterally nothing and and then I
will head to the gym.
So I always start my day withdoing something for myself and
then come back I will check inwith all of my clients and then,
(29:37):
depending on what day it is,I'll either be doing calls I'll
be seeing clients face-to-face,I'll be speaking to people I
don't know, it all depends onbusiness at that point, but yeah
, and then I'll be taking formyself regularly.
I'll be taking regular walksmyself regularly.
I'll be taking like regularwalks or just like every few
hours just going back to myself,but predominantly after that
(29:58):
I'll be with clients or readingbefore bed or something like
that.
Speaker 1 (30:02):
So the key takeaway to me of what you said is that
throughout the day, you havelittle doses of things that you
do that are all about you andall about fueling you.
It's not just you know the oneand done in the beginning of the
day, which is great, and yourmorning routine, I think, is so
important, but you have allthese other ways throughout the
day that you infuse things thatmake you feel good with you and
(30:24):
infuse ways for you to get intouch with yourself.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
Yeah, definitely.
Like I've literally got itscheduled into my diary, like
I've got, I've got colorcombinations yellow is my
personal time and then, likeyou've got, purple and red,
depending on what it is, and forlike, client time and different
things.
So I always start the day offwith yellow and then, like
you'll see, like throughout theday I'll be like, right, I'm
going for a walk here, I'm goingto have my lunch here, I'm
going to do this.
So I know, like I know that nomatter how busy I get, whatever,
(30:51):
whatever comes up in life, Iknow I can just go reset myself
and then I'll come back fresh.
That will always happen, nomatter what I'm doing.
Even like I went to Scotland foran event, every single event
I've actually been to, I've beento a few.
They've been really long events, really long events.
I have literally stood up andgone and take myself for an
hour's break because, like, I'vejust started to feel like again
(31:12):
getting tired now and peoplehave come up to me and they're
you, okay, and I'm like, yeah,I'm just taking a breather, like
I'm just relaxing, and thenI'll be back and they're like,
oh, okay, but I've done it forevery single event.
I think it's so important justto be, just to come back to
yourself.
Yeah, recharge yourself.
Yeah, that's the one.
Recharge myself, and then I goback feeling fresher and like
look for it again.
But I feel like if I'mconstantly going and going and
(31:32):
going, it just pulls you down alittle bit.
You do need to to be yourauthentic self, you need to know
who you are, and I'llconstantly be charging so I
perform better when I get thattime by myself or doing
something for myself.
So that's a that's a must yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
Well, and you also mentioned something that I think
is important.
That ties back into theconfidence which is what we
started the conversation with,which is having the confidence
to do that in an environmentwhere not everybody else is
doing that, and being confidentenough and knowing what you need
for yourself to be your optimalself and being fine saying,
(32:10):
yeah, I'm going to go step outfor an hour.
And that takes a lot ofconfidence to not be swayed, to
have to, you know, sufferthrough, let's say right Power
through, stack it up, sufferthrough and to do something that
other people might not be doing, but yet you're making choices
that are the best choices foryou.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
Yeah, the past me would have never done that.
I wouldn't have even been awarethat I was getting tired or
like this is quite a lot.
Now it's just like.
Now I've learned to be myauthentic self.
I'm confident and making myselflike great.
I can literally just say no,this is good for me.
Right now, if something doesn'talign with what I know, that's
good for me.
I am so confident in sayingit's okay, thank you, it's a way
(32:50):
you say it.
But like, I'm so confident insaying I'm walking away or
saying this is going to actuallydo better for me, whereas
before I was in so manysituations that made me feel not
great because I didn't have theconfidence to speak up for
myself, whereas now I'm just, Idon't say any, I don't like say
anything badly, but I'll just belike I think this will just
benefit me or this isn't feelingright, and then that's that,
(33:12):
like it doesn't.
It doesn't have to be anythingdeep.
Really.
You just got to say actually Iprefer it this way, right yeah,
getting comfortable saying no,something as basic as no that's.
I talk about that a lot with myclients because you can see a
lot of people do live a lifewith people pleasing, and that's
I didn't.
I lived my whole life doingthat, hence what led to that.
So saying no can be really,especially if, yeah, if you've
(33:35):
always done it.
It's hard because you feel likeyou get the thoughts like, oh,
what are they thinking about,what are they doing?
Like you get a lot of thoughtslike the backlash in your head,
not even maybe from them, fromyour head, yeah, and you have to
be confident and just be likeif, but who are you saying it to
?
They should have your bestinterest as well.
If they don't have yourinterests, then you've got to
question them.
Speaker 1 (33:56):
Right, then you don't want them in your life and,
like you said before, so much ofthis, it's like a muscle.
The more you practice thethings that you're talking about
to help build your confidence,the easier it becomes.
And then you don't even secondguess or question or think about
the idea of saying no whensomeone asks you to do something
or wants you to.
You know, go do this and you'relike you know that just doesn't
(34:18):
align and you don't evenquestion it.
It just becomes the way of life.
Yeah exactly.
Speaker 2 (34:23):
I've always been like that.
If it doesn't align, I didn'tknow.
I was like that.
If it felt funny, like inside,even when I was younger, I was
like this didn't feel right.
Or somebody says says how doyou make decisions?
I always used to.
When I had, I was really I wasvery unaware of things.
I was just like I don't know, Ijust follow my feelings and I
never knew what that meant untilI learned it.
And and then people used to say, like the people I was around
(34:45):
were like you're always causinga fuss because you don't just
get on with it and you don't.
And I'm like but it doesn'tfeel right.
And I never knew why thingsdidn't feel right until I've
learned to like right, right,okay, listen to.
Every single time I haven'tlistened to my feelings or my
intuition, it's led me down thewrong path and it's led to a bad
ending.
So listening to your intuitionis the best thing.
Speaker 1 (35:07):
That is probably being aware of your intuition
the biggest thing it's a hugegift and takes time to learn
also as well.
Just for everybody who'slistening.
It doesn't happen overnight.
It is a learned skill andeveryone's intuition speaks to
them in different ways.
Also, not everybody's intuitionspeaks to them as loudly or in
the same way.
I've met people that are likeoh, my intuition comes in
(35:29):
pictures.
I see pictures, I see things,and then there's the meaning in
what I see.
So it's different for everybodyand it is a learned skill.
How do your clients find you?
They love me, but how do peoplefind you Like?
How?
you know I know I found you.
No, I know they love you.
(35:49):
You have the most incredibleenergy.
And I know I found you onInstagram and I don't know if
you were following me or I wasfollowing you or there was some
way that I started following youand I was like, wow, her energy
is just really positive and Ijust was really drawn to your
energy and the content you wereputting out there.
So how do your clients normallyfind you the same?
Speaker 2 (36:13):
Quite a few of my clients have come from word of
mouth through current clients.
However, they've seen me changetheir life.
I've had a few from there, andthen the rest has been social
media.
I used to work in a gym and Iused to get clients from there,
and so it is predominantlysocial media.
Speaker 1 (36:31):
Yeah, which I love that, because social media is a
hard way to make a living folks.
But your content is really realand authentic, so it draws the
right people to you, which isalso really important that you
are being authentically you andyou are attracting the right
people into your life.
Are there days that you justlook at your life and you think
I can't even believe that thisis my life and that these are
(36:53):
the people that are in it?
Speaker 2 (36:55):
Yeah, quite frequently, like I'm just, I'm
just like this, like I love mylife.
I don't know, I can't imagineit any other way, but when I
actually do look back, I'm justlike how much it's changed.
Like so everything.
Like when I used to teach fulltime and stuff, I used to have
like this on a Friday night Iwas been so tired I fall asleep
(37:16):
by nine o'clock.
Saturday would I'd probably goout drinking Sunday, but oh my
god, it's work again tomorrow,but now it's just like flow of
niceness throughout the wholeweek.
Obviously I'm busy, but Iliterally get up.
I love getting up and doingwhat I do and I never thought I
would actually get up and dothat.
So, yeah, it's, you have tocheck in.
Like.
Yeah, like my life now theopportunity I never thought I'd
(37:39):
have, the opportunity that Ihave now coming from where I've
come from and and just literallylove that.
I feel so thankful that I getto do this for a job.
I don't know, I don't know howto explain it.
Like I get up and I am actuallygenerally thankful I get to go
to the gym and then I get tohelp other people feel good,
like that's just an amazing job.
I don't actually know how elseto say it.
Speaker 1 (38:02):
Yeah, it is.
Yeah, it is.
And what's also amazing forpeople, if you don't remember
the beginning of the story, thishas all happened in like five
years, which is not a long timeto have completely transformed
your life.
Speaker 2 (38:17):
It's not.
And if I think about how farI've come just in five years, I
always think, wow, where could Ibe in another five years?
Like I am so excited.
Like I've never had excitementfor the future before.
I used to be getting likeexcited for a night out or
seeing my friend or somethinglike that.
Now my vision is huge.
Like I actually call myselfdelusional because like now I've
seen how quickly I can turnthings around, where I could be
(38:40):
in five years if I told peopleprobably be delusional and
they'll be like what?
Speaker 1 (38:45):
so no, but that's how you create it.
So what's on your bucket list?
What big things do you want todo?
Speaker 2 (38:51):
I want to reach as many people as I can because I
know I've got potential I canhelp.
I already am helping a lot ofpeople.
I know I can help people andI'm such a big perspective of
literally the way they look atthemselves.
Self-love is absolutelyeverything and having the
confidence for themselves.
I don't think that's enough andso I can.
That's my biggest thing isgetting that word out and being
(39:12):
more confident on stage.
So I've started doing likewhat's called like I'm on
classes in internationalspeaking now.
So, yeah, I want to get notmore confident because I'm good,
I I'm confident that I'm goingto do it, but I want to get
better at it.
You know, like when you've I'vedone, I've done it.
Now I'm like okay, I canimprove on this bit.
I can improve on this bittotally.
Yeah, my podcast.
(39:33):
I only just started that like acouple of months ago.
I can't wait to see that.
Where that is in a year or two.
Travelling, yeah, just I don'tknow.
Like literally so many things.
I'm going to start with my ownworkshops.
I'm going to do my own.
I don't know.
There's just so many things.
And I've got business ideaswith other people.
Yeah, like literally, there'sso many different things going
(39:55):
on so I can't say becausesomeone asked me this before and
I said before I could give youa definitive answer.
But now, because I've seen howquickly I can change my life,
how things change rapidly, Icould like I don't, maybe I
don't even know what's going tocome, because it's just I never
believed I would be where I amnow so I couldn't tell you like
I could be somewhere elsecompletely next year.
Speaker 1 (40:17):
I love that because I actually have said the same
thing very recently, when askedthat same question and I did an
exercise in 2024 of projectingwhere it would be in 2027.
And where I am in 2025 looksnothing like the path I thought
I was going to be on to 2027.
And so for me, I said when Iwas asked that same question I
(40:39):
honestly cannot even imaginewhere I will be in 2027.
I really can't.
And that's not a bad thing.
I think in some ways it removesthe attachment to trying to do
the things to progress into thefuture.
It allows an opening of thepossibilities because when
(41:00):
you're living in a space that'sso creative and so
purpose-driven, it's hard to sayand you don't necessarily even
want to limit yourself becauseI'm like you.
If people really heard what Isaid I wanted to do in 2027,
they'd be like, yeah, okay,whatever.
Speaker 2 (41:13):
Yeah, this is what I thought.
Speaker 1 (41:16):
But you're not.
You're not crazy at all,because there's nothing wrong
with having these big dreams.
And who's to say like, why not,why not?
And if it doesn't start withyou believing in yourself and
having the mindset that it'spossible, how is anyone else
ever going to believe inthemselves either?
You know like it has to startwith you.
All of it starts with you.
Speaker 2 (41:33):
And if you always say I'm going to do this in this
year, I'm going to do this inthis year, you end up actually
saying no to things.
I remember I was getting in acycle of just doing things like
day to day and I could seemyself.
Actually I have had a lot ofopportunities.
I was complaining to myself ohyeah, I've done this, I've done
this and I didn't know aboutthese.
But you've actually said no afew times because you wanted to
get there.
(41:54):
So like yeah, I was just likeright, opportunities are coming.
But you just haven't said yes.
So like I went into this year,like this year I'm going to say
yes.
Now I'm just I've got no home.
Like now I can see thatopportunities are here.
So if you say you're going tobe somewhere, you kind of shut
yourself off from otheropportunities.
(42:14):
But if you are kind of like doyou know what?
I don't actually know, I'm opento ideas you kind of go with
what feels good to you and youright, you go more.
So I don't like saying I'mdefinitely going to be here in
2026 because I don't know.
I don't even know I'm going tobe at the end of September, so I
know what I'm going to be doingis my purpose.
I know what my purpose is, buthow I'm going to do it, I don't
(42:35):
know.
Speaker 1 (42:36):
Which I love.
I couldn't agree more.
I think you were so right.
And I had someone who was alsoa coach, who was a guest on my
show, say you know, if you'resaying like, okay, here's the
future mark, and this is anexample for people, here's the
future mark.
I want to make $2 million bythis year, who's to say you
might miss the opportunity?
That's the $4 millionopportunity.
(42:57):
Because you are so focused onwhere that one path is that the
opportunity.
You might miss the opportunity,or you might say yes to the
wrong opportunity opportunity,or you might just be telling the
universe that's the opportunityI want, that's the lane I want,
and then it's closing off theopenness energetically to a
bigger, different lane down.
Speaker 2 (43:27):
Well, you don't have to do this.
But sometimes, where you haveum a journal, someone will say
write down how much you want toearn.
Write down what you want to do.
I'd never actually know,because how do I know?
What field am I gonna like?
I'm not gonna do.
You see what I mean I do.
That is an area I do strugglewith, because if I say that, am
I limiting?
It is that when you're talkingabout manifesting the same, be
specific in what you want.
But then you, you might admitthat I'm very open and what will
(43:48):
come is already coming for meanyway.
So I'm a big believer in that.
Speaker 1 (43:53):
Yeah, no, I agree with you.
I struggle with that exact samething, because all the books
say write down exactly what youwant.
And I'm like but if I'm toospecific, I need to be specific,
but if I'm too specific, maybeI really am closing off the
opportunity, especially when itcomes to finances.
So I've started focusing myselfpersonally on freedoms.
(44:14):
I want to achieve freedoms.
I want freedom financially, Iwant freedom of creativity, I
want freedom to own my own time,the freedom to choose my
relationships, the freedom tochoose where I live, and trying
to really tap into the energyfor me of freedom and have that
be my focus.
Because how I achieve thosefreedoms who's to say that how I
(44:38):
think I'm going to achievethose freedoms is how I'm going
to achieve those freedoms?
Because then you also.
I found I also set myself upfor disappointment and feeling
like I failed when I was like,okay, I'm going to achieve that
freedom by selling this anddoing this and generating
revenue here and here.
It's going to come from here,here and here.
And then, when you don't, youfeel like you failed and that's
not a good feeling either.
Speaker 2 (44:58):
Exactly, yeah, no-transcript along that you
have to learn, because youprobably wouldn't be able to
handle that figure.
Something bigger is coming, butyou needed to learn how you,
(45:20):
how you was going to actuallywork with it when it actually
did come in.
So so everything happens for areason, and so to go with the
flow.
Speaker 1 (45:29):
Yes, exactly, flow, flow and fly my mantra for the
year.
Flow and fly.
All right, so we've taken somuch of your time.
So before we go, I always loveto ask my guests if there's a
book that they have read thathas impacted them personally or
professionally that they wouldlike to recommend to the
listeners, because I believebooks change lives.
We will obviously write intothe show notes about your
upcoming books so that peoplecan get them when they both come
(45:51):
out later this year, but whatbook would you like to recommend
people go and dig into?
Speaker 2 (45:56):
I love a book called you Are a Magnet that I
literally love that.
I know it's called it's fromAmber Lyons.
It's not a very recognized book, like it's not somewhere like
amber lions.
It's not a very recognized booklike it's not somewhere.
Like you know, you've got likethe power of now.
You've got all of these, likeeverybody's read these.
But you are a magnet.
Not many people have read that.
It's all about your world.
Is you on the inside, like it'sjust reflecting.
(46:18):
It's just always that literallyit's just that she always.
It just reminds you to ifsomething's going wrong or
something's like in real yourrelationships, your finances,
something like that.
It's always like that is areflection of you.
So you are a magnet.
You attract what you are notlike.
So it's just a really.
I've read it so many times nowjust because sometimes it's just
good to just write.
Do you know what?
It just makes you remember towhatever's going on, to go
(46:41):
inwards.
Hence the reason I always go inwith every few hours.
And, first thing, it's just areally good book.
So it's Amber Lions, you Are aMagnet, and it's literally
explaining how your world is.
Just that you're just lookingat yourself on an outside
perspective.
That's basically what itteaches you and it just I've
read it so many times now itjust, it's just as a reminder,
it's just like an easy read,it's a reminder to go inwards
(47:02):
and why.
And it's I just it.
So I've read like lots of books, but I think that's just like
an easy read and it's just areally good reminder.
Speaker 1 (47:10):
I am going to have to read that, because it is a
philosophy that I truly believethat we're all just energy and
that if you're unhappy withwhat's going on on the outside,
you need to look on the inside,and that we like attracts like,
and.
But I love a new read, so thankyou, I'm going to check that one
out because sometimes eventhose of us who could sit on
social media and say we haveamazing lives like.
Every day is not sunshine androses, folks, and we struggle
(47:32):
with all the same things and thechallenges and having to get
the right mindset, and just youknow, it's a process, it's a
journey, it's something that welove to do, but it doesn't mean
that we're not actively,proactively, having to do all
these things every day in ourown lives as well.
Speaker 2 (47:49):
We are all still human.
We're all just energy balls andjust like trying to bring good
energy to the world.
I think things like that isgreat.
Speaker 1 (47:58):
She's on Instagram as well, I'm going to go follow
her.
That is so great.
Is there anything that I didn'task you that you want to make
sure we share with the listeners?
Did I miss anything Not that Iknow of?
I think you've done great.
Oh, thank you so much and thankyou for making the time while
you're traveling.
I so appreciate it.
I'm going to put into the shownotes.
I'm going to link everything sopeople can follow you, they can
(48:18):
stay up to date on your book,they can get coaching and help
life help from you if they'reinterested.
I know you help people all overthe world.
So thank you so much and goodluck with your travels and we
will definitely stay in touch.
Thank you for having me.
It's been lovely, it's beengreat, thank you.
Thank you for joining us foranother episode of the House of
(48:40):
Jermar podcast, where wellnessstarts within.
We appreciate you being a partof our community and hope you
felt inspired and motivated byour guest.
If you enjoyed this episode,please write us a review and
share it with friends.
Building our reach on YouTubeand Apple Podcasts will help us
get closer to our mission toempower 1 million women to live
all in.
You can also follow us onInstagram at House of Jermar and
(49:03):
sign up to be a part of ourmonthly inspiration newsletter
through our website,houseofjermarcom.
If you or someone you knowwould be a good guest on the
show, please reach out to us atpodcast at houseofjermarcom.
This has been a House of Jermarproduction with your host, jean
Collins.
Thank you for joining our house.
A lot of times people look at people on the outside,
especially through social media,and it seems like they have it
all together and the distancefrom where they are to where
they want to go is so huge.
And I know you as a coach.
You really help people withlike the steps, Like it's a
process.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
And I always say that they're always waiting for them
.
But why do you have to wait tobe happy, like I reckon right
now?
If I waited for something else,it was one day I dreamed of
having this life.
So why am I like, do you know?
I mean, enjoy it while you'rehere, whilst you're still
working to progress, but I thinkpeople are always focusing on
the next thing.
They never sit back andactually take in what they've
actually got right now.
(00:37):
Yeah, that's a big thing.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Welcome to the House of Jerm podcast where wellness
starts within.
The House of Germar is alifestyle brand, empowering
women to live all in throughinterior design and personal
wellness.
We are a destination for womenready to reimagine what is
possible in their homes andlives and then create it.
(01:00):
We are honored to have you joinus on our mission to empower 1
million women to live all in.
I am your host, jean Collins,and I invite you to become
inspired by this week's guest.
Welcome to the House of Germarpodcast, where wellness starts
within.
I'm your host, jean Collins,and today we are going to talk
(01:21):
about confidence.
I am so excited for thisbeautiful soul who is my guest
today Louise Collier.
She's coming.
All the confidence.
I am so excited for thisbeautiful soul who is my guest
today Louise Collier.
She's coming all the way.
I'm in Connecticut, she's inthe UK.
I screwed up the first time wewere supposed to record, which
is totally my fault, and she isjust such an amazingly beautiful
soul and I had the greatesttime talking to her when we did
(01:42):
our pre-call.
So I am so excited to bring toyou guys her story, everything
that she is doing.
When I say she is just a badassindividual, she is, and just
has, a heart of gold.
So, louise, thank you forjoining us from all the way over
in the UK.
Hello.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Thank you for having me.
It's such a pleasure.
Honestly, thanks for having me.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
You are welcome.
I am so excited to share yourstory and I will just give a
caveat to everybody.
If you know, we don't know howthis recording is going to go,
so we're going to give it ourbest shot here and you know, we
might break up and have to startagain, which is fine, it's all
good.
This is real life.
But her story is so importantthat it is worth trying to bring
it to you.
And she is traveling, so she'snot even in her home, so I have
(02:26):
not afforded her the luxury ofher being in her own home.
She's traveling, so we're goingto talk about that too, and I
appreciate her making time whileshe is traveling.
So, to get started, your storyis wow, so wow.
Would you mind sharing a littlebit about your background that
has gotten you to where you aretoday?
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Okay, I don't actually know where to start
because there's so many elements.
So if you start from, like whenI was very, very young, I never
really fit in.
I was bullied for being mixedrace, I was different out of the
family, I never really had likeany identity and I used to grow
up really really quickly,quickly, and this kind of
followed me through my life,through like my marriage.
(03:07):
Um, I married into a Mauritianfamily, so again, I was kind of
like the black sheep out of thefamily and a lot of bullying was
happening, not just in that,but like in childhood and
everything.
And the point where life gotreally really tough, the point
where at the same time I lostall, all my family, like my mom,
my dad, my brother, my husband,my dog, my home, my businesses,
(03:31):
a baby, all at the same time.
And then we went into COVID andat this point I was really
unhappy.
I was actually a size 24, veryoverweight.
I really hated myself.
I was like I just couldn'tstand anything and at that point
I didn't have anything exceptmyself being unhealthy.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
That is a serious low .
You losing everything is aserious low.
So our listeners might not beat a low that's quite as low as
yours was.
However, you were able to comeout of your low, so what?
And it's COVID which is a lowfor everybody.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Yeah, exactly, so you have the double low.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
So what did you do?
What were the first steps thatyou started to take to come out
of this incredible low?
Speaker 2 (04:18):
I always say there wasn't something dramatic that
actually happened to me to makeme like, okay, I want to change
this around.
It was very gradual, so like Ididn't need like when I actually
I found like a room and Istayed.
Eventually I stayed in a roomand it was like this moldy room.
Um, I was, I didn't leave thehouse for like three, four
months but eventually one of myfriends was texting me all the
(04:38):
time saying, get up, get a wash,doing like basic things.
And just one day I listened andthen just like this is going to
sound disgusting, but I brushedmy teeth and I had a wash and I
just felt better.
And then from there I startedlike introducing like 10 minutes
of exercise here, there andeverywhere and that, just that,
just like focusing on myself andrealizing me doing something
for myself, because obviouslyfor my whole life I'd looked
(05:00):
after other people.
I never knew who I did.
My whole life was dedicated toother people.
This was the first time I'dactually done something to make
me feel better and it kind oflike I grew a lot of self-love,
a lot of self-confidence overthe years from just that point
where I was like, oh my God,that wash has actually made me
feel fresh without realizing,going from that Like I feel a
(05:21):
bit fresh now, like I actuallyfeel good without having all of
these people and having all ofthat.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
So it was just the simplest of thing that started
it.
Obviously it wasn't just that,yep, but you're not the first
guest I've had on that has saidthat.
I had another guest on duringseason one who was also, you
know, very overweight and wasoverweight and had a drinking
problem and was at a very lowpoint and she said hers started
with taking a vitamin and thenher next step was having a face
(05:54):
routine, washing her face.
And it sounds so simple.
Yet at the same time, whenyou're in that low, the act of
doing something for yourself, assmall as that is and as simple
as that is, can be what startsyou onto an entire journey of
personal wellness.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
Honestly, the change in just having a wash I don't
know, that sounds crazy isamazing.
So this is why, with like anappliance or anybody, I
recommend what can you do rightnow, Like you don't have to look
for anything significant.
Now there is something that youcan do to lift yourself up
immediately.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Which is a really important point because we are,
we live in a society.
That's like I will be happywhen I will feel better about
myself, when I will go to thegym and exercise, when this
happens and when a lot of timespeople look at people on the
outside, especially throughsocial media, and it seems like
they have it all together andthe distance from where they are
to where they want to go is sohuge.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
Yeah, and I know you as a coach.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
You really help people with like the steps, like
it's a process.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
And I always say that they're always waiting for them
.
But why do you have to wait tobe happy, like I reckon right
now?
But if I waited for somethingelse, it was one day I dreamed
of having this life.
So why am I like, do you know?
I mean, enjoy it while you'rehere, whilst you're still
working to progress.
But I think people are alwaysfocusing on the next thing.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
So talk to me about exercise, because you've lost a
ton of weight.
How did that happen?
Speaker 2 (07:22):
like I said, started very, very small in this like
moldy room 10 minutes, 10, 20minutes started there and then I
started.
So I previously I was in thearmy, I used to box.
I used to be very, veryathletically fit but then,
through like mental health andeverything, I did gain a lot of
weight and so I was completelyopposite to what I used to be.
(07:43):
But every single time I gotlike athletically fit.
Last time it was because of anexternal thing, it was because I
wanted to look good or I hadlike a boxing match or I had
something to actually worktowards.
So this time it was like losingCOVID and I was like I've got
nothing, I can't do any of them,it's just literally for me.
So I started just doing exercisein my room when the gym started
to um open.
(08:04):
I just started going to the gym, started eating healthier,
starting doing little things,and it wasn't because I used to
suffer with um eating disorders,even from a child, like I used
to have like binge eatingdisorder.
I used to like hide food, soI'd go from one end of the
spectrum to the other so like Ididn't eat next to nothing or
I'd eat absolutely everything.
So I've been really, reallythin.
I don't like saying skinny, butlike not very big.
(08:26):
I've been very small and I'vebeen very, very big from each
spectrum, but this is the firsttime I learned how to use my
intuition about how my bodyfeels, what was good for me,
what wasn't good for me, and eatfrom that.
And I just lost weight becauseI started to love myself and I
wanted to exercise.
And I think there's a massivedifference from doing it from an
external goal to actuallywanting to feel good or wanting
(08:49):
to just be healthy and just havea better life for yourself,
whereas all the other times Itrained or anything, it was just
because I wanted to look goodor I had a boxing mat or a run
or something.
So it wasn't.
Until I lost my whole identityand I was learning how to love
myself, I was like, oh my god,exercise is actually really good
for me, these foods are goodfor me, and then that's how I
naturally lost like 52 kgwithout and I reversed, like, my
(09:11):
eating disorder.
So like, obviously, like,sometimes I get a little bit of
triggers but you work throughthem and it's a really good
thing because I never I wasn'taware of that in the past I just
thought this is what I do, butnow I'm so aware of what I'm
doing, I just love how it makesme feel, and I think learning to
love how you feel because youdeserve it, that's what changed
me and that's why I loveexercise more than what I used
(09:33):
to.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
So I have a question and I don't know what the answer
is going to be to this question, but as I'm listening to you
talk, I can visualize the youback then, right, the overweight
.
I've lost everything.
You don't have a lot of selfconfidence.
Trying to find that self loveis so difficult.
So when you were that personand you looked in the mirror at
(09:55):
yourself, what did you see?
Speaker 2 (09:57):
That's a really difficult question because I
don't think I actually did seemyself, because from a young age
I was always like looking afterlike my mum, or I was looking
after my brother.
As I grew up, I always hadsomething else to focus on.
I don't think I ever focused iton me.
So when I did look in themirror I think I don't actually
(10:17):
know it was someone completelydifferent.
So I straightened my hair forthe first time last year or was
it this year, something likethat and I literally looked in
the mirror and first time Ihaven't straightened my hair
since before Covid or then Covidtimes when I'd lost everything
and I literally cried because Ididn't recognize that person,
and so that was the first time Istraightened it from them.
(10:38):
So I don't actually rememberwhat I seen.
I just remember how I felt.
I just remember hiding andcrying because I never fit into
my clothes on my birthday andstuff like that, but I don't
actually remember what I seen.
But when I seen that girl inthe mirror when I straightened
my hair, I didn't like it.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
It brought back those memories, yeah, so.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
I'm not going to straighten my hair.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
So when did you learn about confidence?
Did you know at the time thatyou didn't have a lot of
self-confidence and that you hadto figure out how to build that
?
Or did confidence come later?
Speaker 2 (11:11):
No, I actually generally thought I was
confident.
I thought I was shy because Iwas never able to speak to more
than two people at a timewithout sweating and stuff.
I thought I was generally shy.
So I thought there was someareas where I didn't have
confidence and but then I alwaysI knew.
I knew I had confidence toachieve things because I came
from literally nothing.
But then they told me to quituni to be a teacher.
(11:32):
But I was like I'm going to dothis.
So like, deep down I was likeI'm still going to do it.
So like I still managed to doit.
Like people saying, are you notgoing to earn a lot?
So I built a businesses, I didthings.
I always had the confidencethat I could do it.
But when it actually came outand looked like I didn't have
confidence and so I think it wasmore of a battle inside.
Deep down I've always had it inme which I didn't know because
(11:54):
I wouldn't have been able toachieve what I had.
But then I had to learn how toreally really know that I was
confident.
It was just some sort offriction inside of me that I
didn't even know.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
Yeah, and you had to work through that.
Yeah, how did you do that?
Did you get help from otherpeople?
Books, podcast, like how do youdo?
Speaker 2 (12:15):
that, looking at my life on a bird's eye perspective
, like literally looking at,like my spiritual journey, my
exercise and what I'm puttinginto my body and emotional
intelligence, how am I reactingto things?
And looking and this is, do youknow, like your habits, your
positive habits and what you'reactually doing, I noticed how I
am actually a really positiveperson and seeing how I was
(12:37):
different, around differentpeople, in different areas,
certain things I could feel off.
And that's when I was noticingI was just like I'm only like
this in this area.
This isn't right for me and Ilearned why.
And then now, when I go intothese certain environments or
around these people, I know howto handle it, whereas before I
was just like I didn'tunderstand what all these
feelings were.
I didn't understand why I feltlike that.
(12:59):
So I just saw it within me.
But I just didn't understandbecause I was, when you're
around certain things andgrowing up, quite different.
But I learned how to navigatethe emotions.
It was just literally lookingat what made me feel good and
just changing my perspective onthings.
So in my head of when you'vebeen told certain things from a
child, so you take that throughyour adulthood, so you have to
(13:20):
kind of like not reverse, butyour thoughts and your brain are
like a muscle.
So you have to kind of like notreverse, but your thoughts and
your brain are like a muscle.
So you have to kind of likesubconsciously change your
thoughts and work on yourthoughts.
It's just like a muscle.
So like I was noticing, likesitting back when I was with
people, the thoughts I washaving about myself possibly
wasn't even thinking that.
And this is where you have tochange your thought patterns.
(13:43):
Just as you would.
We all go to the toilet, weflush the toilet, we brush our
teeth every morning.
We have more habits and thoughtpatterns we have in our
subconscious mind than we do inreal life, but nobody actually
becomes aware of them.
So I've really gone into thesubconscious and like what am I
telling myself every single day?
Because that's what I'mlistening to the most Did you
(14:03):
meditate?
Speaker 1 (14:04):
Is that part of your practice?
Speaker 2 (14:06):
Yeah, I meditate every day.
I do journal, but I don'tjournal, so like I like writing
some positive thoughts, so like,if I'm having, I like to like.
I don't really like journalingas such.
I like to like positive thingsthat have happened in the day.
What's going to happen tomorrow?
Walking I literally lovewalking First thing in the
(14:29):
morning.
I will either go for a walk orI'll go straight to the gym.
I always set off my day withoutspeaking to anybody else and
doing something for myself forthe first hour and and just,
yeah, making sure I surroundmyself with like-minded people.
I think your environment reallymakes a massive difference.
So, like I've said, I've justleft my own home.
So like people are saying, oh,you can come, stay here.
But there's been times I'm likeno, it's okay, I've chose
somewhere where I feel like theenvironment's nice for me and
(14:50):
even though there's not muchspace but the people are lovely,
like the energy is nice it's.
You've got to be really carefuland you've got to be able to
have confidence.
If it's not the right energyfor you, you have to walk away
from it, no matter theconsequences, because that's
what's going to hold you backand then you become a part of
that yeah all, so true.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Wow.
So how did your business start?
Did it start from exercise?
How did it start when?
Speaker 2 (15:15):
I started to love exercise because what it was
doing for me, rather than what Iwas starting to look like, like
how it was changing my life andthe perspective I was having on
life.
I was like, right, I can help,I knew I was going to change.
I was starting to look likelike how it was changing my life
and the perspective I washaving on life.
I was like, right, I can help,I knew I was going to change.
I was actually a dentistryteacher at that time, was in
COVID and I was like thisdoesn't feel right.
I know I'm going to be doingsomething different and I
(15:37):
thought it was either going tobe helping people or animals.
I started doing my PT and and Iliterally loved it.
But then I the way I learned tolove exercise was I started to
(15:59):
lose weight because I love doingit for myself, whereas notice,
when I was a PT which I am stilla PT you can easily give
someone a program.
Easily, you can look at somebody, give them a program, tell them
meal plan, whatever it is, butgetting somebody to want to do
it for themselves is acompletely different thing.
They will do it for a fewmonths, they might get bored and
they'll be like oh well, I'vegot into my dress now and it
will just be like, and it willjust go to the back burner.
(16:20):
I want people to want to lovethemselves enough, confident
enough that they can take itinto life.
So I did like psychology andhealth and fitness NLP I did.
I've done a few things thatlike help with like the brain
and all of these things.
So I get people to literallylove themselves and want to do
it for themselves, not just forwhat they look like and what
(16:41):
they think they should look like, rather than comparing
themselves on social media andstuff.
So getting people to want tochange their life for the better
for them.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
It's not just about the exercise and the nutrition.
You're doing the whole mind,body, spirit, soul connection.
It's not just about because weall know exercise.
Everyone knows exercise is goodfor you, everyone knows that
eating healthy is good for you.
We know these things.
I love that you focus so muchmore deeply on the why behind
why people do these things andreally getting them to change.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Yeah, and looking at it as a bird's eye perspective,
like, if you look, even ifsomebody goes to the gym five
times a week, that's only fivehours.
You've still got 165 hours ofthe week.
So I look at all of that aswell because like, yeah, you can
have a great time in the fivehours, but you can still be
really unhappy at home or inyour work or something like that
, which then has that negativeeffect.
Like, you want to balance itout.
(17:32):
If you're working well, itshould flow throughout your
whole life.
So I became like a life coachof doing my master's and doing
like there's just like it allcomes as one.
It's like a whole cycle.
You can't focus on one andeverything.
So, yeah, that's, exercise juststarts things.
You start to feel it, you startto look at things differently
because you're feeling better.
(17:52):
So that's how it started.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
And then it grew into this whole business.
So if someone asked you, youknow what do you do, how do you,
how do you describe what you do?
Speaker 2 (18:04):
This is really hard because it depends on what the
client is, but I literally helppeople believe in themselves,
give them the confidence throughwhatever that is.
I help them get whatever theywant aesthetically make them
feel healthier either put weighton, lose weight and make them
feel good.
Get them confident in whateverthey want to do in the gym.
I also like look at their lifeas a life coach and, as they
(18:26):
like help with their thoughtpatterns, nlp, like um,
subconsciously like, okay, we'reall living cycles.
They're like if they're sayingto me oh, I always do weight,
but then I always do this.
Okay, why do we always do that?
It goes back from somewhereelse.
There I do, I break cycles, Ibuild the confidence from what
they're already doing andeventually they are.
(18:46):
My clients are startingbusinesses.
They're losing weight, they'regetting, they're getting yeah,
yeah, they're getting a raise.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Promotion.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
They're getting all of these things as well as like
actually loving it, spending,like making time for the gym,
learning, like like theirchildren are following their
footsteps now, like they'remaking making, like it's just
absolutely amazing, like beforethey were they felt bad for
going to the gym because theyhad a child or they were always
tired from work or they didn'tthink they could have the
business, they couldn't havethis.
But but from doing tiny littlethings and just literally
(19:16):
looking, sitting back andlooking like their life and what
they've always been through,and like we just change it
completely.
Sometimes it takes, sometimesit can be quite quick, sometimes
it can be progressive,depending on the client, but
yeah, there's been massive lifechanges physically, mentally,
spiritually, in the not just theclient, the whole family, and
you can see how it's just like adomino effect.
(19:39):
They become more vibrant, thewhole family life becomes more
vibrant.
They're getting pay rises,businesses are opening.
It's just great and I feel sohappy, I feel honored.
So obviously I went through alot, but I'm not happy it
happened.
I'm so thankful it happenedbecause I've got all this life
(20:00):
experience so I can actuallyresonate with my clients when
they're going through something.
And whatever happened wouldn'thave led me to where I am now.
So I'm just honored that ithappened and it's opened so many
opportunities in my heart,because I know how it feels when
you're doing certain thingslike I just I get, just get so
happy, like it just makeseverything, everything you've
been through, it just makes itworth it, like I'm feeling
(20:22):
better.
But on top of that I'm makingso many other people feel better
as well, like if I can do it,coming like practically homeless
to where I am now and upliftingmy life.
I know they can do it and onceyou believe it, it happens, and
that's what happens with them.
They believe it and then youtake the action.
As soon as you believe inyourself, you're going to take
action.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Yeah, it snowballs, yes, and people need to go
follow you on Instagram becauseyou post so many inspiring,
inspirational things about howyou did go through this journey
and how you did transform, and Ilove that.
You are really a coach of lifeand trying to help people with
the bigger picture of life, andexercise and nutrition is part
(21:02):
of it and mindset is part of it.
It's it's, to me, is soimpactful that you have this
gift and I always say, as acoach, we learn so much from our
clients, like our clients alsoteach us, and it's such a gift
to be a coach because it's a twoway street.
You know, you get from them andyou see their growth and that
growth helps you grow as well asa coach.
(21:23):
So it is as you said it is agift to be able to do this for a
living.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Yeah, I was literally talking about that today,
actually talking about how, evenas a coach, we are still human.
So, like, we all have had likedays where you're like, oh,
could do with a lion today anddifferent stuff like this.
But then when it has been dayswhere my clients have actually
uplifted my day and I'm like, oh, it doesn't ground me, and I'm
like they've actually groundedme a few times when they've had
(21:47):
their wins or something likethat, and I'm like I literally
love this.
So it does actually work bothways.
When they're having a good day,I'm having a good day, it's
just amazing.
So you're kind of all in thesame boat.
So, yeah, I'm so thankful formy clients like, and because
they they trust me.
Like I went through a phase of,oh, my god, these clients trust
me with their life.
Because it's a very personalthing, isn't it?
(22:08):
The things they say to you andlike, especially as a PT, and
like, um, some of the traumathings that we might have to
uncover and things.
It's very personal and I justsit there like, did this person
like trust me?
They haven't even met me andI'm just like, yeah, I generally
feel honored and I'm like, whenI see them get the wins.
I think I get more emotionalbecause they don't actually.
(22:29):
Sometimes you don't rememberhow far you've gone, myself
included, until someone remindsyou and they're like, oh yeah,
and I get more emotional becausethey don't see themselves like
that, but I still see them likethat, so it's good.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
Yes, it's so powerful .
It's powerful.
So you have written two bookswhich we must discuss.
So you have written two books.
What made you decide you wantedto start to write and become an
author?
Speaker 2 (22:54):
so I didn't actually decide to write.
A lot of people were telling meso, like there's snippets in my
life where we haven't reallydiscussed, but there's like bits
of my life and everyone's likeyou should just write a book,
you should write a book.
And I was like, yeah, yeah,yeah, whatever.
And then I was like, yeah, Ijust let that go past.
But then, like I was just likedo you know what?
Because I noticed with mycoaching how much I was actually
helping people.
And so mum was like it actuallydid come across.
(23:18):
So I actually put across I wasgoing to write a book and I put
it on my vision board.
I had a mindset coach and then,before you know it, I'm having
an interview with this guycalled Marco and he was like
actually I was just putting myhouse up for sale, I was going
to go traveling and I was goingto write a book and all of this
stuff.
And then he was like actuallywe're looking for people that
have turned their life around,that want to help other people,
and we're doing a world booktour as well.
And I was just like I'veliterally just written that on
(23:44):
my vision board, like a fewweeks ago, and I was like, oh my
God, this is just like otherpeople telling me to do this.
So that's the first book sowhere it's like a little bit of
my life, like there's so manyamazing other co-authors that
I'm writing with have had likesimilar experiences or
completely different experienceswhere they've had an experience
in life where they've had toturn their life around.
So that's what that one is, andso it's just that book's more
(24:06):
motivational.
If we can do it, you can do it.
And then the second book thatI'm doing is a solo one by
myself.
It's an experience of likethankful that everything happens
and just like all the stepsI've taken to literally turn my
life around from literallynothing like mentally,
physically, financially,spiritually, absolutely
(24:27):
everything, and steps on how youcan flip that around, where to
go and how to move up.
Really.
So it's more of a guide, butthrough my own experiences
qualifications.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
It's giving your coaching experience to a much
broader audience.
Yeah, exactly is what it's,what it's doing, which is
incredible.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
It's like what I'm providing to my clients now, but
through a book.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Right, so you can reach a much broader audience by
doing that.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Yeah, yeah, which is really powerful.
Someone reads that book, it cansave their life.
It saved my life just by doingcertain things.
I've been in hospitals mentalhospitals I've been.
In all that.
I've saved my own life and Iknow that I can save so many
people's lives, that I've triedto save my own life and I know
that I can save so many people'slives physically and mentally.
So I used to be scared oftalking out about my personal
(25:18):
stuff, but now I'm like you knowwhat this can actually help so
many people.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
Yes, it can.
So you just mentioned the wordscared because I was going to
ask you how do you deal withfear?
Because there is fear when yougo to try something new, do
something new, start a newbusiness, write a book, all the
things that you're doing.
There can be a lot of fear, andthere also can be a lot of fear
around imposter syndrome, Likewhy does anyone care what I have
(25:42):
to say or what I've done?
So what do you personally do tohelp yourself battle those
fears?
Speaker 2 (25:49):
The first fear is just an emotion.
Every single emotion is goingto come and go.
I always do that.
Every single emotion is goingto come and go, but I always do
that and the emotion is alwaysattached to the thought.
The thought is something that'sprobably imposter syndrome I
can't do this, I can't do that.
So then I battle with that andlearn how to deal with the
emotion.
You either use it or you let itrun you.
So I use that emotion and putit into something good, either
(26:10):
gym, into my work, into goodthings, and then with the
thought processes, so like thisis going to fail.
Why would people want to listento me?
I always counterbalance it.
Is that actually true?
Why don't people want to listento me?
Has anybody told me they don'twant to listen to me?
Well, actually no, a lot ofpeople have told me they do want
to listen to me and I'mactually helping them.
(26:30):
So it's just like is that justmy head telling me that, or is
it somebody else physicallysaying that?
If I'm in subconsciously, Ialways say I can't do this, and
probably it comes out my mouthsometimes as well, but then I'll
look at like I've done so manyother things.
Why can't I do this?
Like you've proved yourselfwrong every single time.
So if you've got activethoughts, I literally just
(26:50):
counter like write them down.
It's as simple.
Like you can do it on the spot.
Like just write it down, isthat actually true?
Back it up with a fact and then, obviously, with the motion,
just understand this is just anemotion.
You've got through every otherbad day.
You've got through a lot worsethan this and just recognizing
anything that you do that is,the first rep is going to be
uncomfortable and but you've gotto love.
(27:12):
You've got to learn to lovethat, because that's where you
grow the most.
So if you don't do that, you'rejust going to stay in one place
.
So you kind of have to like useit.
Use it to your ability, likeyou kind of get used to it yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
So you mentioned a couple things I think are so
important.
It's like you have to be aware.
You have to be aware of thosethoughts, you have to question
whether they're based in factsor not, which I love.
I've had multiple guests comeon the show talking about you
know the facts behind the storythat we tell ourselves which is
so powerful, right?
So often our narrative is notactually based in fact if we
(27:48):
really challenge ourselves forthe facts.
And then you talked aboutemotion, which I love, because
I've also had lots of guestscome on the show talking about
the importance of feeling theemotion and working through the
emotion, and you made such agreat point about trying to take
that emotion and not stuff itdown, and find a way to
(28:08):
positively channel that emotionof fear.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Yeah, a massive thing .
And I think having some sort ofemotional intelligence is
always good as well, becausewhen you're in emotion,
sometimes you don't make theright decision.
So you've got to learn, whenyou are in emotion, to just like
sit back, use the emotion andput it into the right place,
rather than you can either useit for a positive thing or you
can do it for a reactive thing,so like say, if you were I don't
know't know for an example, youwas in an argument with a
(28:34):
partner or something you can'vegot the option.
You can either say somethingfrom the emotion that might go
backfire, or you can sit down,look at it, reflect and be like,
actually, what's that?
What am I actually learningfrom this?
And this is what I always tryand do.
If I'm feeling somethinguncomfortable, rather than
reacting, I'll be like, okay,what can I learn from this?
What's happening?
Am I, am I in too emotional?
Like what's going on?
So when you are feeling somesort of emotion, you don't like
(28:56):
it's perfect, like, okay, thisis time for me to learn
something, what I'm learningrather than react.
So learn and then react whenyou've literally looked at
yourself first.
Speaker 1 (29:07):
Right Take a pause look inward first.
Yes, Such good advice.
So what does a day in your lifelook like?
Speaker 2 (29:16):
I always start the day by myself, so I will either
be going if it's a rest day I'llbe going for a walk, like
literally in nature.
Sometimes I have a podcast on,sometimes I'll just be listening
to vinyl or being sort ofliterally nothing and and then I
will head to the gym.
So I always start my day withdoing something for myself and
then come back I will check inwith all of my clients and then,
(29:37):
depending on what day it is,I'll either be doing calls I'll
be seeing clients face-to-face,I'll be speaking to people I
don't know, it all depends onbusiness at that point, but yeah
, and then I'll be taking formyself regularly.
I'll be taking regular walksmyself regularly.
I'll be taking like regularwalks or just like every few
hours just going back to myself,but predominantly after that
(29:58):
I'll be with clients or readingbefore bed or something like
that.
Speaker 1 (30:02):
So the key takeaway to me of what you said is that
throughout the day, you havelittle doses of things that you
do that are all about you andall about fueling you.
It's not just you know the oneand done in the beginning of the
day, which is great, and yourmorning routine, I think, is so
important, but you have allthese other ways throughout the
day that you infuse things thatmake you feel good with you and
(30:24):
infuse ways for you to get intouch with yourself.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
Yeah, definitely.
Like I've literally got itscheduled into my diary, like
I've got, I've got colorcombinations yellow is my
personal time and then, likeyou've got, purple and red,
depending on what it is, and forlike, client time and different
things.
So I always start the day offwith yellow and then, like
you'll see, like throughout theday I'll be like, right, I'm
going for a walk here, I'm goingto have my lunch here, I'm
going to do this.
So I know, like I know that nomatter how busy I get, whatever,
(30:51):
whatever comes up in life, Iknow I can just go reset myself
and then I'll come back fresh.
That will always happen, nomatter what I'm doing.
Even like I went to Scotland foran event, every single event
I've actually been to, I've beento a few.
They've been really long events, really long events.
I have literally stood up andgone and take myself for an
hour's break because, like, I'vejust started to feel like again
(31:12):
getting tired now and peoplehave come up to me and they're
you, okay, and I'm like, yeah,I'm just taking a breather, like
I'm just relaxing, and thenI'll be back and they're like,
oh, okay, but I've done it forevery single event.
I think it's so important justto be, just to come back to
yourself.
Yeah, recharge yourself.
Yeah, that's the one.
Recharge myself, and then I goback feeling fresher and like
look for it again.
But I feel like if I'mconstantly going and going and
(31:32):
going, it just pulls you down alittle bit.
You do need to to be yourauthentic self, you need to know
who you are, and I'llconstantly be charging so I
perform better when I get thattime by myself or doing
something for myself.
So that's a that's a must yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
Well, and you also mentioned something that I think
is important.
That ties back into theconfidence which is what we
started the conversation with,which is having the confidence
to do that in an environmentwhere not everybody else is
doing that, and being confidentenough and knowing what you need
for yourself to be your optimalself and being fine saying,
(32:10):
yeah, I'm going to go step outfor an hour.
And that takes a lot ofconfidence to not be swayed, to
have to, you know, sufferthrough, let's say right Power
through, stack it up, sufferthrough and to do something that
other people might not be doing, but yet you're making choices
that are the best choices foryou.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
Yeah, the past me would have never done that.
I wouldn't have even been awarethat I was getting tired or
like this is quite a lot.
Now it's just like.
Now I've learned to be myauthentic self.
I'm confident and making myselflike great.
I can literally just say no,this is good for me.
Right now, if something doesn'talign with what I know, that's
good for me.
I am so confident in sayingit's okay, thank you, it's a way
(32:50):
you say it.
But like, I'm so confident insaying I'm walking away or
saying this is going to actuallydo better for me, whereas
before I was in so manysituations that made me feel not
great because I didn't have theconfidence to speak up for
myself, whereas now I'm just, Idon't say any, I don't like say
anything badly, but I'll just belike I think this will just
benefit me or this isn't feelingright, and then that's that,
(33:12):
like it doesn't.
It doesn't have to be anythingdeep.
Really.
You just got to say actually Iprefer it this way, right yeah,
getting comfortable saying no,something as basic as no that's.
I talk about that a lot with myclients because you can see a
lot of people do live a lifewith people pleasing, and that's
I didn't.
I lived my whole life doingthat, hence what led to that.
So saying no can be really,especially if, yeah, if you've
(33:35):
always done it.
It's hard because you feel likeyou get the thoughts like, oh,
what are they thinking about,what are they doing?
Like you get a lot of thoughtslike the backlash in your head,
not even maybe from them, fromyour head, yeah, and you have to
be confident and just be likeif, but who are you saying it to
?
They should have your bestinterest as well.
If they don't have yourinterests, then you've got to
question them.
Speaker 1 (33:56):
Right, then you don't want them in your life and,
like you said before, so much ofthis, it's like a muscle.
The more you practice thethings that you're talking about
to help build your confidence,the easier it becomes.
And then you don't even secondguess or question or think about
the idea of saying no whensomeone asks you to do something
or wants you to.
You know, go do this and you'relike you know that just doesn't
(34:18):
align and you don't evenquestion it.
It just becomes the way of life.
Yeah exactly.
Speaker 2 (34:23):
I've always been like that.
If it doesn't align, I didn'tknow.
I was like that.
If it felt funny, like inside,even when I was younger, I was
like this didn't feel right.
Or somebody says says how doyou make decisions?
I always used to.
When I had, I was really I wasvery unaware of things.
I was just like I don't know, Ijust follow my feelings and I
never knew what that meant untilI learned it.
And and then people used to say, like the people I was around
(34:45):
were like you're always causinga fuss because you don't just
get on with it and you don't.
And I'm like but it doesn'tfeel right.
And I never knew why thingsdidn't feel right until I've
learned to like right, right,okay, listen to.
Every single time I haven'tlistened to my feelings or my
intuition, it's led me down thewrong path and it's led to a bad
ending.
So listening to your intuitionis the best thing.
Speaker 1 (35:07):
That is probably being aware of your intuition
the biggest thing it's a hugegift and takes time to learn
also as well.
Just for everybody who'slistening.
It doesn't happen overnight.
It is a learned skill andeveryone's intuition speaks to
them in different ways.
Also, not everybody's intuitionspeaks to them as loudly or in
the same way.
I've met people that are likeoh, my intuition comes in
(35:29):
pictures.
I see pictures, I see things,and then there's the meaning in
what I see.
So it's different for everybodyand it is a learned skill.
How do your clients find you?
They love me, but how do peoplefind you Like?
How?
you know I know I found you.
No, I know they love you.
(35:49):
You have the most incredibleenergy.
And I know I found you onInstagram and I don't know if
you were following me or I wasfollowing you or there was some
way that I started following youand I was like, wow, her energy
is just really positive and Ijust was really drawn to your
energy and the content you wereputting out there.
So how do your clients normallyfind you the same?
Speaker 2 (36:13):
Quite a few of my clients have come from word of
mouth through current clients.
However, they've seen me changetheir life.
I've had a few from there, andthen the rest has been social
media.
I used to work in a gym and Iused to get clients from there,
and so it is predominantlysocial media.
Speaker 1 (36:31):
Yeah, which I love that, because social media is a
hard way to make a living folks.
But your content is really realand authentic, so it draws the
right people to you, which isalso really important that you
are being authentically you andyou are attracting the right
people into your life.
Are there days that you justlook at your life and you think
I can't even believe that thisis my life and that these are
(36:53):
the people that are in it?
Speaker 2 (36:55):
Yeah, quite frequently, like I'm just, I'm
just like this, like I love mylife.
I don't know, I can't imagineit any other way, but when I
actually do look back, I'm justlike how much it's changed.
Like so everything.
Like when I used to teach fulltime and stuff, I used to have
like this on a Friday night Iwas been so tired I fall asleep
(37:16):
by nine o'clock.
Saturday would I'd probably goout drinking Sunday, but oh my
god, it's work again tomorrow,but now it's just like flow of
niceness throughout the wholeweek.
Obviously I'm busy, but Iliterally get up.
I love getting up and doingwhat I do and I never thought I
would actually get up and dothat.
So, yeah, it's, you have tocheck in.
Like.
Yeah, like my life now theopportunity I never thought I'd
(37:39):
have, the opportunity that Ihave now coming from where I've
come from and and just literallylove that.
I feel so thankful that I getto do this for a job.
I don't know, I don't know howto explain it.
Like I get up and I am actuallygenerally thankful I get to go
to the gym and then I get tohelp other people feel good,
like that's just an amazing job.
I don't actually know how elseto say it.
Speaker 1 (38:02):
Yeah, it is.
Yeah, it is.
And what's also amazing forpeople, if you don't remember
the beginning of the story, thishas all happened in like five
years, which is not a long timeto have completely transformed
your life.
Speaker 2 (38:17):
It's not.
And if I think about how farI've come just in five years, I
always think, wow, where could Ibe in another five years?
Like I am so excited.
Like I've never had excitementfor the future before.
I used to be getting likeexcited for a night out or
seeing my friend or somethinglike that.
Now my vision is huge.
Like I actually call myselfdelusional because like now I've
seen how quickly I can turnthings around, where I could be
(38:40):
in five years if I told peopleprobably be delusional and
they'll be like what?
Speaker 1 (38:45):
so no, but that's how you create it.
So what's on your bucket list?
What big things do you want todo?
Speaker 2 (38:51):
I want to reach as many people as I can because I
know I've got potential I canhelp.
I already am helping a lot ofpeople.
I know I can help people andI'm such a big perspective of
literally the way they look atthemselves.
Self-love is absolutelyeverything and having the
confidence for themselves.
I don't think that's enough andso I can.
That's my biggest thing isgetting that word out and being
(39:12):
more confident on stage.
So I've started doing likewhat's called like I'm on
classes in internationalspeaking now.
So, yeah, I want to get notmore confident because I'm good,
I I'm confident that I'm goingto do it, but I want to get
better at it.
You know, like when you've I'vedone, I've done it.
Now I'm like okay, I canimprove on this bit.
I can improve on this bittotally.
Yeah, my podcast.
(39:33):
I only just started that like acouple of months ago.
I can't wait to see that.
Where that is in a year or two.
Travelling, yeah, just I don'tknow.
Like literally so many things.
I'm going to start with my ownworkshops.
I'm going to do my own.
I don't know.
There's just so many things.
And I've got business ideaswith other people.
Yeah, like literally, there'sso many different things going
(39:55):
on so I can't say becausesomeone asked me this before and
I said before I could give youa definitive answer.
But now, because I've seen howquickly I can change my life,
how things change rapidly, Icould like I don't, maybe I
don't even know what's going tocome, because it's just I never
believed I would be where I amnow so I couldn't tell you like
I could be somewhere elsecompletely next year.
Speaker 1 (40:17):
I love that because I actually have said the same
thing very recently, when askedthat same question and I did an
exercise in 2024 of projectingwhere it would be in 2027.
And where I am in 2025 looksnothing like the path I thought
I was going to be on to 2027.
And so for me, I said when Iwas asked that same question I
(40:39):
honestly cannot even imaginewhere I will be in 2027.
I really can't.
And that's not a bad thing.
I think in some ways it removesthe attachment to trying to do
the things to progress into thefuture.
It allows an opening of thepossibilities because when
(41:00):
you're living in a space that'sso creative and so
purpose-driven, it's hard to sayand you don't necessarily even
want to limit yourself becauseI'm like you.
If people really heard what Isaid I wanted to do in 2027,
they'd be like, yeah, okay,whatever.
Speaker 2 (41:13):
Yeah, this is what I thought.
Speaker 1 (41:16):
But you're not.
You're not crazy at all,because there's nothing wrong
with having these big dreams.
And who's to say like, why not,why not?
And if it doesn't start withyou believing in yourself and
having the mindset that it'spossible, how is anyone else
ever going to believe inthemselves either?
You know like it has to startwith you.
All of it starts with you.
Speaker 2 (41:33):
And if you always say I'm going to do this in this
year, I'm going to do this inthis year, you end up actually
saying no to things.
I remember I was getting in acycle of just doing things like
day to day and I could seemyself.
Actually I have had a lot ofopportunities.
I was complaining to myself ohyeah, I've done this, I've done
this and I didn't know aboutthese.
But you've actually said no afew times because you wanted to
get there.
(41:54):
So like yeah, I was just likeright, opportunities are coming.
But you just haven't said yes.
So like I went into this year,like this year I'm going to say
yes.
Now I'm just I've got no home.
Like now I can see thatopportunities are here.
So if you say you're going tobe somewhere, you kind of shut
yourself off from otheropportunities.
(42:14):
But if you are kind of like doyou know what?
I don't actually know, I'm opento ideas you kind of go with
what feels good to you and youright, you go more.
So I don't like saying I'mdefinitely going to be here in
2026 because I don't know.
I don't even know I'm going tobe at the end of September, so I
know what I'm going to be doingis my purpose.
I know what my purpose is, buthow I'm going to do it, I don't
(42:35):
know.
Speaker 1 (42:36):
Which I love.
I couldn't agree more.
I think you were so right.
And I had someone who was alsoa coach, who was a guest on my
show, say you know, if you'resaying like, okay, here's the
future mark, and this is anexample for people, here's the
future mark.
I want to make $2 million bythis year, who's to say you
might miss the opportunity?
That's the $4 millionopportunity.
(42:57):
Because you are so focused onwhere that one path is that the
opportunity.
You might miss the opportunity,or you might say yes to the
wrong opportunity opportunity,or you might just be telling the
universe that's the opportunityI want, that's the lane I want,
and then it's closing off theopenness energetically to a
bigger, different lane down.
Speaker 2 (43:27):
Well, you don't have to do this.
But sometimes, where you haveum a journal, someone will say
write down how much you want toearn.
Write down what you want to do.
I'd never actually know,because how do I know?
What field am I gonna like?
I'm not gonna do.
You see what I mean I do.
That is an area I do strugglewith, because if I say that, am
I limiting?
It is that when you're talkingabout manifesting the same, be
specific in what you want.
But then you, you might admitthat I'm very open and what will
(43:48):
come is already coming for meanyway.
So I'm a big believer in that.
Speaker 1 (43:53):
Yeah, no, I agree with you.
I struggle with that exact samething, because all the books
say write down exactly what youwant.
And I'm like but if I'm toospecific, I need to be specific,
but if I'm too specific, maybeI really am closing off the
opportunity, especially when itcomes to finances.
So I've started focusing myselfpersonally on freedoms.
(44:14):
I want to achieve freedoms.
I want freedom financially, Iwant freedom of creativity, I
want freedom to own my own time,the freedom to choose my
relationships, the freedom tochoose where I live, and trying
to really tap into the energyfor me of freedom and have that
be my focus.
Because how I achieve thosefreedoms who's to say that how I
(44:38):
think I'm going to achievethose freedoms is how I'm going
to achieve those freedoms?
Because then you also.
I found I also set myself upfor disappointment and feeling
like I failed when I was like,okay, I'm going to achieve that
freedom by selling this anddoing this and generating
revenue here and here.
It's going to come from here,here and here.
And then, when you don't, youfeel like you failed and that's
not a good feeling either.
Speaker 2 (44:58):
Exactly, yeah, no-transcript along that you
have to learn, because youprobably wouldn't be able to
handle that figure.
Something bigger is coming, butyou needed to learn how you,
(45:20):
how you was going to actuallywork with it when it actually
did come in.
So so everything happens for areason, and so to go with the
flow.
Speaker 1 (45:29):
Yes, exactly, flow, flow and fly my mantra for the
year.
Flow and fly.
All right, so we've taken somuch of your time.
So before we go, I always loveto ask my guests if there's a
book that they have read thathas impacted them personally or
professionally that they wouldlike to recommend to the
listeners, because I believebooks change lives.
We will obviously write intothe show notes about your
upcoming books so that peoplecan get them when they both come
(45:51):
out later this year, but whatbook would you like to recommend
people go and dig into?
Speaker 2 (45:56):
I love a book called you Are a Magnet that I
literally love that.
I know it's called it's fromAmber Lyons.
It's not a very recognized book, like it's not somewhere like
amber lions.
It's not a very recognized booklike it's not somewhere.
Like you know, you've got likethe power of now.
You've got all of these, likeeverybody's read these.
But you are a magnet.
Not many people have read that.
It's all about your world.
Is you on the inside, like it'sjust reflecting.
(46:18):
It's just always that literallyit's just that she always.
It just reminds you to ifsomething's going wrong or
something's like in real yourrelationships, your finances,
something like that.
It's always like that is areflection of you.
So you are a magnet.
You attract what you are notlike.
So it's just a really.
I've read it so many times nowjust because sometimes it's just
good to just write.
Do you know what?
It just makes you remember towhatever's going on, to go
(46:41):
inwards.
Hence the reason I always go inwith every few hours.
And, first thing, it's just areally good book.
So it's Amber Lions, you Are aMagnet, and it's literally
explaining how your world is.
Just that you're just lookingat yourself on an outside
perspective.
That's basically what itteaches you and it just I've
read it so many times now itjust, it's just as a reminder,
it's just like an easy read,it's a reminder to go inwards
(47:02):
and why.
And it's I just it.
So I've read like lots of books, but I think that's just like
an easy read and it's just areally good reminder.
Speaker 1 (47:10):
I am going to have to read that, because it is a
philosophy that I truly believethat we're all just energy and
that if you're unhappy withwhat's going on on the outside,
you need to look on the inside,and that we like attracts like,
and.
But I love a new read, so thankyou, I'm going to check that one
out because sometimes eventhose of us who could sit on
social media and say we haveamazing lives like.
Every day is not sunshine androses, folks, and we struggle
(47:32):
with all the same things and thechallenges and having to get
the right mindset, and just youknow, it's a process, it's a
journey, it's something that welove to do, but it doesn't mean
that we're not actively,proactively, having to do all
these things every day in ourown lives as well.
Speaker 2 (47:49):
We are all still human.
We're all just energy balls andjust like trying to bring good
energy to the world.
I think things like that isgreat.
Speaker 1 (47:58):
She's on Instagram as well, I'm going to go follow
her.
That is so great.
Is there anything that I didn'task you that you want to make
sure we share with the listeners?
Did I miss anything Not that Iknow of?
I think you've done great.
Oh, thank you so much and thankyou for making the time while
you're traveling.
I so appreciate it.
I'm going to put into the shownotes.
I'm going to link everything sopeople can follow you, they can
(48:18):
stay up to date on your book,they can get coaching and help
life help from you if they'reinterested.
I know you help people all overthe world.
So thank you so much and goodluck with your travels and we
will definitely stay in touch.
Thank you for having me.
It's been lovely, it's beengreat, thank you.
Thank you for joining us foranother episode of the House of
(48:40):
Jermar podcast, where wellnessstarts within.
We appreciate you being a partof our community and hope you
felt inspired and motivated byour guest.
If you enjoyed this episode,please write us a review and
share it with friends.
Building our reach on YouTubeand Apple Podcasts will help us
get closer to our mission toempower 1 million women to live
all in.
You can also follow us onInstagram at House of Jermar and
(49:03):
sign up to be a part of ourmonthly inspiration newsletter
through our website,houseofjermarcom.
If you or someone you knowwould be a good guest on the
show, please reach out to us atpodcast at houseofjermarcom.
This has been a House of Jermarproduction with your host, jean
Collins.
Thank you for joining our house.
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