Back in Black

I'm back after a four-year hiatus! This is a short update on where I've been and how it's impacted my creative work.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, and welcome to season two of How to Be
Creative. This is your host,Kat O'Leary, and I am back
after a roughly four yearhiatus from this podcast. Um,
for this episode, I'm justgonna do a quick little update.
I actually didn't scriptanything, so hopefully it's not
too meandering , um, orpointless. Um, but just wanted

(00:24):
to kind of catch up on, youknow, where I've been, where
we've been as a societyglobally , um, over the past
four years. Uh, I won't go intoeverything. I think most of you
remember what we allcollectively went through. Um,
but just wanted to talk about afew things and I guess how they
have affected , um, my creativelife. So I think actually this

(00:48):
story for me begins prior tothe pandemic in the first week
of January, 2020 , um, when mycousin Matt Dore , um, died
quite suddenly , um, andunexpectedly , uh, he had had
seizures his entire life. Um ,I'm not gonna go into too much

(01:08):
detail here, but I , I justdon't like the idea of anyone
filling in the blanks with, youknow , um, a false
interpretation of his death. Um, but ultimately , um, he ended
up having a , a seizure andpassing away. Um , Matt was
someone who was very importantto me. He was a huge
cheerleader of mine, which ,um, you know, as someone who

(01:34):
maybe hasn't always feltsupported by all members of my
family in my creative endeavors, um, Matt was certainly
someone who always showed upfor me. And , um, he was an
artist in his own right. He wasa musician and a writer , um,
and just someone who was, youknow, very, very special to me
and, and who I still thinkabout every day . Um, and so

(01:57):
that was kind of the frame ofmind that I was in when we all
entered the Pandemic in Marchof 2020 here in the us . Uh,
and so I can definitely say Ido not recommend , um, heading
into a global pandemic whenyou're already grieving a
pretty terrible loss. Um, butI, you know, you don't get to
choose. Um, and so I think thatcombined with the Pandemic

(02:21):
really kind of stalled out mycreative endeavors for quite a
while, including this podcast.
Um, so didn't really do muchwriting. Um, I'm sure that some
of you who are listening tothis have never listened to a
podcast of mine before, don'tknow who I am, et cetera. So ,
um, you know, just to give somecontext for who I was pre

(02:41):
pandemic , um, I was , uh, youknow, kind of ramping things up
creatively. So I had launchedthis podcast in the second half
of 2019. Um , had interviewed abunch of people. Um , I'm
actually gonna shift away fromthat format, which I'll talk
about a little bit later onthis episode,

Speaker 2 (02:59):
I guess. Um, had done some solo episodes , um,
in addition to that, had aHallmark Christmas movie
podcast with my best friendNicole, which I still have. Um
, we just haven't been as goodabout keeping up with it. Um, I
had done a Hallmark , uh, moviepodcast , um, mini series for

(03:21):
Valentine's Day, which is myfavorite holiday. So doing a
lot of podcasting. Um, I usedto write novels I shouldn't say
used to. I, I'm still, youknow, trying to , um, pick that
back up, but I actually wasdoing it before the pandemic
and , um, the pandemic reallymade it hard for me to kind of

(03:41):
sit down and do any kind ofsaint sustained creative work.
Um, yeah. Uh, so that's kind ofwhere, where I've been over the
past few years. Um, and I thinkonly recently have I kind of
been moving towards some formof creative recovery. One thing
I've been doing veryintentionally to help that

(04:04):
along has been , um, that I amalmost to week nine of the
Artist's Way, which is a 12week program from Julia
Cameron. It's a book. Um, it'sbeen around a long time. I
think it's at either the 25thor 30th anniversary , um, by
now. But , um, it's describedas a spiritual path to higher

(04:25):
creativity. It's basically ,um, you know, a course in
discovering and recovering yourcreative self is another , uh,
term that I'm definitelyreading off the cover of the
edition that I have, which isthe 10th anniversary edition.
So I've had this book in mypossessions , um, among my
possessions since probably2006. Um, and I, I first

(04:47):
learned about it throughKimberly Wilson , um, who is
this amazing creative , um,entrepreneur, multi-passionate,
who I followed for years andyears and years, who's now also
become a friend of mine. Um, sosidebar that Kimberly's was the
first podcast that I everlistened to. Um, it is called
Tranquility du Jour . Iactually was a guest on it a

(05:07):
couple of years ago. Um, but Iwould say, you know, this is
just one of the many, manytools around creativity , um,
that I've learned about fromKimberly . I can't even tell
you how many times in the pastI've started this process of
going through the artist's way.
Um, this time I feel prettyconfident that I'm actually

(05:28):
going to complete it. Um , Ibegin week nine , um, on
Sunday. I'm recording this on aFriday. Um , I think I can make
it through, you know, the fourmore weeks than I have. Um ,
and , uh, simultaneously I'mjust feeling more inspired by
the world around me. Um, Ithink a big thing that's

(05:50):
happening in the world rightnow, and apologies if you can
hear the sirens , um, outsidemy window , um,

Speaker 3 (05:56):
Here in Brooklyn, but , um, I have recently
become very aware , um, of howmany things I have to be
grateful for , um, in a waythat I, I think was kind of ,
um, you know, unreachable oruntouchable for me in the past.

(06:18):
So , um, gratitude for me hasalways been easily accessible
from an intellectualstandpoint. Obviously I know
that I am very blessed. Um ,you know , a lot of things in
life have been easier for methan they are for a lot of
other people, and I absolutelyrecognize that. Um, at the same

(06:39):
time, it's only recently Ithink that I, I've kind of felt
that viscerally in my body, anda lot of it has been just
witnessing from far away , um,everything that's going on in
the Middle East with thegenocide in Palestine, and just
really , um, kind of feeling inmy bones in a , in a way that I

(06:59):
haven't previously been able toaccess. Um, just this awareness
of how lucky I am that, youknow, truly by accident of
birth, I was born into, youknow, a safe country, city ,
um, family, et cetera . And Ithink this kind of awareness ,

(07:25):
um, has gotten me to a placewhere I feel really strongly
like it's my responsibility todo something with all of the
privileges that I've been given, um, you know, more so than
I've felt in the past. Um, and, um, you know, I think there's

(07:46):
been a part of me that has feltlike I need to be doing more in
terms of protesting oreducating myself , um, around
conflicts that are happeningaround the world. And it , it's
not just Palestine that's goingon right now. Um, there's also,
you know, terrible, a terriblesituation in Haiti and one in
Sudan. And , um, I think, youknow, previously it's been

(08:13):
really easy to shame myselfaround not feeling like I'm
doing enough to educate myself,to educate others, to use my
voice. Um, and you know, whileI, I do believe it's important
to stay informed, I do believethat it is important for me to
use my voice and make it clear,you know, which side of history
I'm on. I also think thatthat's not the best use of my

(08:37):
gifts necessarily, and that away that I can, within the
scope of what I'm actuallyskilled at, contribute
meaningfully to the world and ,and try to make the world a
better place, is to try toinspire people to lead

Speaker 4 (08:55):
Lives that feel more fulfilling and authentic to
them. Um, and so I think that'skind of where I'm at. Um, and
what I'm trying to do more of ,um, while, you know, kind of
trying to walk the line of justunderstanding , um, you know,
how dark things are right nowand, and how terrible they feel

(09:18):
for a lot of people. And , um,I guess what I'm saying is that
I feel a heightened sense ofresponsibility to use the gifts
that I do have in whateversmall way I can. So I'm going
to make an awkward transitionhere , um, back to talking
about this podcast specificallyand how I envision the format

(09:41):
changing slightly for this verydelayed second season. Um, so
the first thing is that I am nolonger, at least for the time
being going to be conductinginterviews , um, I find that ,
um, you know, there are justsignificantly more work for me
to edit than these , uh,episodes where I'm kind of by

(10:03):
myself right now. I'm actuallysitting on my bed cross-legged
with my cat on my lap , um,which is probably not the right
, um, you know, posture forspeaking into a microphone, but
, um, my voice coaches can takethat up with me later. Um, so
it's a big undertaking to editthose episodes that do involve

(10:26):
an interview, but also , um,they just don't perform as
well. It feels like people arenot quite as interested in them
, um, which is sort ofsurprising to me 'cause I've
had a few guests on who aredefinitely better known than I
am. I would've expected thosenames to pick up , um, you
know, more , uh, listeners thanme alone. Um, but that's not

(10:49):
proving to be the case. So Ithink the , um, uh, horrible
business term, the juice wasn'tworth the squeeze, but that's
where we are. So for the timebeing, I'm going to test out
purely doing episodes that areme alone. Um, and we'll see how
that goes. Um, I think also Iam in a place right now where ,

(11:12):
um, yes, this is a podcastabout creativity, but I am more
aware now, I think even then Iwas a few years ago, that there
is a lot of underlying workthat needs to be done before
you can get to a place where ,um, you're able to really let
your creative talents shine.
And so I think there's a chancehere that in this season I will

(11:36):
veer off into some directionsthat may not be directly about
creativity, but ultimately tiein with the goal of doing your
best creative work and living acreative life. I think that's
where I'm gonna end thisepisode. Um, but uh , if you
have any questions orsuggestions or feedback, you

(11:58):
can always reach me at cat KATat how to be creative.org. And
I will see you for episode two.