How to Split a Toaster: A divorce podcast about saving your relationships

How to Split a Toaster: A divorce podcast about saving your relationships

Seth Nelson is a Tampa based family lawyer known for devising creative solutions to difficult problems. In How to Split a Toaster, Nelson and co-host Pete Wright take on the challenge of divorce with a central objective — saving your most important relationships with your family, your former spouse, and yourself.

Episodes

October 19, 2021 57 min

Erika Anne Englund spent 15 years as a divorce attorney, professional mediator, and law professor before becoming Chief of Strategy at SupportPay. And she tells it like it is — divorce is hard for everyone involved. That’s why it’s so important to trap the language we use that piles negative emotion on an already difficult situation. To start, let’s agree to stop reading articles that have some variant of “Learn to Survive the Holi...

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Jordan Shapiro is a professor at Temple University, a senior fellow for the Joan Ganz Cooney Center at Sesame Workshop, and Nonresident Fellow in the Center for Universal Education at the Brookings Institution. He’s also author of two books, “The New Childhood: Raising Kids to Thrive in a Connected World” and his newest book, Father Figure: How to Be a Feminist Dad,” a new take on “dad-psychology” that challenges our assumptions of...

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All right, we get it. A review of benefits programs might not seem like the most entertaining fodder for a podcast about divorce. But wait, just hear us out.

See, if you're on your spouses benefits program, you could be looking a unraveling a potentially expensive web of coverage, from life insurance to health plans to pensions, IRAs, and 401ks, each of which leads to choice you get to make on a specific — and regulated — time ...

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This week on the show, we’re taking on one of the BIG divorce questions. It comes right along with “where am I going to live,” and “what am I going to do with my life?” … it’s the question of money. Divorces can get expensive and you need to know how to pay for it.

One option — one of several — is Divorce Financing, and our guest today is fouder and CEO of New Chapter Capital, an organization that specializes in capital financing f...

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Bringing in a "forensic accountant" to your divorce team sounds serious, and it is. But it's far from the dour experience the title implies. In fact, having an expert in understanding the numbers in your divorce can play an invaluable role in creating a clear, accurate, and fair split.

As you listen, if you're not a numbers person (as Pete is certainly not), you might find the thought of the whole endeavor overwhelm...

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Soberlink is a tool used to identify, test, and communicate alcohol use. If you’re in addiction recovery you might think of it as your accountability partner. For our purposes, it’s all about being accountable to yourself, to your former spouse, and to the court, in an effort to keep clean and preserve your relationships with your kids in the divorce process.

Chris Beck joins us from Soberlink to talk about the tool, the technology...

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Our guest today has spent years in the publishing business, but it was only when her marriage broke up that she found the inspiration to write a book of her own. Available: A Memoir of Sex & Dating After a Marriage Ends, is a no-holds-barred look at post-divorce rehabilitation and the experiences of a woman on a journey of invention.

“Don’t judge me,” says author Laura Friedman Williams. And that’s one of the central messages i...

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Becoming the step-parent is not something we’re naturally built to do. Genetic wiring can get messy when it comes to taking on parenting duties for our new spouse’s kids. Add to that, we're facing an uphill battle against media and pop culture expectations of the perfect step-parent creating assumptions of what the new family is supposed to look like, just about all of which is off the mark.

Enter The Essential Stepmom

This wee...

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Gabrielle Stone pulled on the threads of her own marriage, until it came apart. At the other end, she'd discovered spare phones, receipts, emails, and an extraordinary web of social media posts that came together to paint a picture of her husband's extensive affair with a younger woman.

In her day job, Stone is filmmaker. Her films It Happened Again Last Night and After Emma earned her awards for writing, directing, and act...

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It's safe to say we're all dog people around Toaster HQ. They're not big dogs. They're small, cuddly dogs that like to sit on laps and couches and generally give us peace. Unless they see a bike. Bikes are bad news.

In the eyes of the law, these adorable creatures are considered pretty simple property. Sure, they're about as easy to split as a toaster, but the court doesn't care. Pets become another box to c...

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We're gearing up for our fourth season which will begin in just a few weeks. Along the way, we've been reflecting on lessons learned in the last three seasons, reviewing which episodes have resonated with you. As such, we thought we'd use a bit of our break while we're preparing new episodes, to share a few of our favorites from the first three seasons.

This is where it starts. You're in a relationship that isn&...

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It’s the last episode of our season and we’re going out with a bang. We introduce Pete’s new favorite acronym by way of Subsequent Lawsuits After Divorce (S.L.A.D.) and talk about all the ways you might find yourself back in court after your divorce is over. The law is made up of some confusing statements on responsibilities as they’re assigned in the divorce process and we outline the major buckets of circumstances that will see y...

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Let’s just say you’re a woman and you’re about to divorce. We know, crazy, right? But stay with us on this. When you walk away from your marriage, what is it that you most want your former spouse to know? If you could wave a magic wand, not to somehow recover your relationship, but to cast a spell that would ensure that your former spouse truly understood your perspective, what would you say?

This week on the Toaster, Michelle Demp...

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This week we’re taking on the biggest question of the separation: should I stay or should I go? To help, we welcome Kate Anthony, host of the New York Times recommended podcast, The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast, and certified coach with over a decade’s worth of experience helping women make this decision for themselves.

The process can be messy, but Kate has a few key questions that help us make sense of the emotional process of ...

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Our guest today is Linda Murphy, founder of the Relationship and Divorce Counseling Center where she and her colleagues work to help others through difficult relationship transitions. Sometimes, that means coaching through the divorce process. But sometimes, it means catching the relationship before divorce becomes the destination.

When should you start counseling? What signs are you watching that you might be able to save the marr...

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Ninety percent of divorce conflict can be resolved through dialog and negotiation. But what about that last ten percent? In these situations you might find yourself interacting with partners that have moved from the frustration and grief natural in the divorce process and into what we have come to call high conflict behavior.

Our guest today is Megan Hunter, co-founder of the High Conflict Institute, an organization dedicated to th...

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Gabrielle Hartley is a nationally-recognized divorce attorney, online mediator and divorce strategy coach with a strong focus on conflict resolution. She is the author of Better Apart: The Radically Positive Way to Separate and she joins us today to share how she brings mindfulness to the divorce process.

No, Gabrielle doesn't lead her clients through a yoga practice in the mediation process. But she does lead us through some ...

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It's easy to get stuck looking out when you're navigating the divorce process. You're focused on your kids, your soon-to-be former spouse, support teams helping you move, divide finances, and generally get your life in order.

When it feels like your grip on your world is most tenuous, when you're facing a period of great stress, this is the time to stop, take stock, and reflect.

This week on the show, Seth Nelson le...

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Randall Kessler founded the law firm now known as Kessler & Solomiany, LLC in 1991. Today, the Atlanta-based firm sports 30 attorneys and staff and in the course of their family law practice, they've represented some of the highest profile clients in the country; athletes, TV and film personalities, judges, politicians, and industrialists.

As such, Kessler has a unique perspective on the divorce process. This week, he joins...

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May 11, 2021 41 min

The healthy post-divorce is a perennial favorite around these parts. But what happens when the divorce process is not so peaceful?

We’re talking about exchanges of power in the divorce process. Subversive or passive aggressive texts, emails, and calls. Secrets about money and property. Fights. They all lead to a more combative and complicated divorce, and may lead to questions of safety. What can you count on from your legal team, ...

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