How Do You Repair a Relationship When Trust Has Been Broken?

In this week’s episode of the Summer Q&A Series, Nicole answers a deeply personal and universally relevant listener question: “How do you repair a relationship when trust has been broken—and you know you’ll never accept their point of view?”

With pastoral care, biblical grounding, and hard-earned wisdom, Nicole unpacks the spiritual and emotional nuance of reconciliation. Drawing from Matthew 18 and the parable of the unforgiving servant, she explores what it means to truly forgive someone from the heart—and how that differs from rebuilding trust or restoring a broken relationship.

Nicole challenges the common myth that forgiveness equals relational closeness, and instead introduces a framework for discerning when and how to rebuild a relationship. Listeners will walk away with clarity, compassion, and a path forward for their most complex relational wounds.

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Main Takeaways

• Forgiveness and Reconciliation are not the same: You can forgive someone fully without restoring the relationship to what it once was.

• Forgiveness is about release: Releasing the debt someone owes you doesn't mean ignoring the pain or pretending it didn’t happen.

• Trust Must Be Rebuilt: Trust after betrayal requires mutual effort—both people must be willing to rebuild from their side of the breach.

• Respect is the Minimum Requirement: You don’t need to share the same worldview to have a relationship—but both parties must be willing to listen and respect one another.

• Relationships exist on a spectrum: Not every relationship needs to be fully restored. Some may be repositioned to a more distant—but still loving—place.

• Scripture challenges us to forgive radically: Jesus’ parable in Matthew 18:21–35 underscores the magnitude of the forgiveness we've received—and the forgiveness we're called to extend.

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📜 Bible Verse References

• Matthew 18:21–35 – Parable of the Unforgiving Servant

• Jeremiah 17:9 – “The heart is deceitful above all things…”

• Psalm 139:23–24 – “Search me, God, and know my heart…”

• Matthew 6:12 – “Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.”

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