August 19, 2025 • 19 mins
From breastfeeding battles and toddler food rebellions to school lunch fatigue and the eternal “what’s for dinner?” question, feeding a family is never just about food—it’s about love, control, tradition, and survival. In this episode, Elissa shares her war stories from the trenches of motherhood: leaking pumps, picky eaters, Pinterest lunch fails, family dinners, and the nightly short-order kitchen.
Along the way, she digs into the science behind kids’ nutrition, the emotional tightrope of body image, and the unexpected joy of teaching her daughters to cook. Because in the end, it’s not really about the peas or the pizza; it’s about the memories made around the table.
And if you’ve ever wished there was an easier way to answer “What’s for dinner?”—good news. Elissa and a friend are building Fork & Tell, a new app that helps families and friends share, organize, and pass down recipes that matter. Think of it as the recipe box reimagined for real life. Stay tuned: it might just save dinner.
Like a good meal, this episode is best when shared, so pass it along to a friend who’s ever faced the nightly dinner dilemma.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
Welcome back to, I Get It fromMy mom, the podcast where we
talk about the things parentsand children should be talking
about, but sometimes avoid.
I'm Elissa host mom, groceryshopper for my family, and
someone who has spent the lastGod knows how many adult years
answering the same questionevery single day.
(00:22):
What's for dinner?
Today I'm flying solo again.
No Ava, no Maggie, just me andmy war stories from the trenches
of feeding a family.
And let me tell you, it's been ajourney from breastfeeding
battles to teenage DoorDash,bills that require a second
mortgage where covering it all.
(00:43):
Here's the thing about feedingkids.
It's never really just about thefood.
It's about love, control,tradition, and somehow always
running out of the, and somehowalways running out of the one
ingredient you definitely boughtyesterday.
Let's get into it.
(01:13):
So let's start at the verybeginning.
I felt really strongly aboutbreastfeeding, not in a
judgmental way toward othermoms, but for me personally, it
felt important.
It seemed like the reason femalemammals in nature have breasts,
and as someone whose tatas areon the rather large side, I felt
(01:33):
they were likely intended tofeed an army, so I wanted to
give it my best shot.
Honestly, the science behind,it's pretty incredible.
Breast milk contains over 200components, proteins, fats,
antibodies, and amazingly, itchanges composition throughout
the day and as your baby grows,it's like having a personal
(01:54):
nutritionist working 24 7 insideyour body.
But the reality of making itwork, even for just six months
with both girls, wasn't all thatpretty.
You constantly question how muchthey're getting since you can't
truly measure what's coming outas a result, sometimes you feel
like you're all boobs all daysince you just assume every time
(02:17):
the baby cries, they're hungry.
There's the leaking, the nipple,cracking the dripping nurse milk
down your stomach, having towalk away from friends and
family to go to the other roomto feed so you don't expose your
nipples to your father-in-law.
Then there was the pumping, thefrozen milk, the crying over
literal spilled milk, thebottles and nipple sizes, I can
(02:41):
still recall the sound of mypump felt like a cow getting
milked.
Hopefully the technology is alittle better today.
I remember pumping and dumpingat my sister's bachelorette
party in Atlantic City, NewJersey.
Yes.
Dumping liquid gold becausealcohol and breast milk don't
(03:03):
mix, but a girl's just gottahave fun, right?
My cousin, also a new mom, and Iliterally had a pump and dump
after party in our hotel roomthat night.
And here's where it getscomplicated.
Ava had reflux, not colic, butreflux and feeding became this
whole production.
She'd eat, then scream, thenprojectile, vomit everywhere
(03:26):
we're talking.
Outfit changes for both of us,sometimes multiple times a day.
Poor baby and poor mommy.
At six months with both girls, Itransitioned to formula.
Fed is best and so was my mentaland physical health.
With Ava, of course, we had totry multiple formulas before we
found one that was pre-digestedand agreed with her stomach.
(03:50):
It was stinky on the way in andon the way out, but she
tolerated it.
Okay.
Maggie was far easier in thistransition, and frankly, with
her, I just wasn't producingbreast milk the way I had
initially, so it was time tomove on.
So, while the research showsthat breast milk has incredible
benefits, formula fed babiesgrow up totally fine and what
(04:12):
might be right for one mothermay not be right for the other,
and that's fine too.
Anyone who judges you for howyou feed your baby clearly has
too much time on their hands andshould probably get a hobby as
for me.
I'm glad I did it as motherNature intended, but as you can
tell, I was definitely notsomeone who was in love with it
(04:33):
at all.
Fast forward six months andwe're entering the wonderful
world of solid foods.
The stage one, those singleingredient purees, rice, cereal,
sweet potatoes, bananas.
Both my kids liked the sweetstuff, the fruits, and hated the
veggies.
So all veggies somehow got mixedwith fruits and I probably
(04:53):
screwed my kids in their tastebuds.
I learned later, somethingfascinating about kids and
tastes.
Children have about 30,000 tastebuds compared to our adult
10,000.
That's why they're so sensitiveto bitter flavors and
vegetables.
Their taste preferences areliterally hardwired differently
than ours.
So it does take many exposuresto foods to get a kid to like
(05:16):
it.
And I probably gave up way tooeasily.
Ava as many do with the firstchild.
I pureed and made my own babyfood.
That lasted maybe a few weekstops, and then we just spent too
much money on organic jarredstuff from the specialty grocery
store.
The combinations were not ones Iwould've cooked, but she and
(05:39):
Maggie both ate them.
I frankly remember lots of thoseGerber puffs and lots of
Cheerios stuck in the strollerand car seats at that age.
And then the toddler phase waswhen my children became food
critics.
The chicken nuggets are toocrispy.
No wait.
They're not crispy enough.
This banana's too squishy.
This sandwich is cut wrong.
(05:59):
It's supposed to be triangles,not rectangles.
And God forbid the crusts aren'tcut off.
Everything had to have its ownsection on the plate like we
were running a tiny segregatedcafeteria.
But here's the one thing we gotright in all of this, and I
repeat the one.
The only one thing we got right.
(06:19):
We never allowed screen timeduring meals.
We made sure we or someone satwith the girls and talked with
them every time they ate.
Even if we had dinner later thanthem, after we returned from
work, we still had them sit withus to understand how a family
dinner time went and to maybetry what we were having to eat
or fruit or dessert while wetalked about our days.
(06:41):
We have never been perfectlyhealthy eaters and we definitely
order in or eat out too much andenjoy too many carbs with our
meals.
But we tried to model goodeating etiquette and behavior,
and still to this day we dofamily dinner time as much as
our schedules allow.
So can we talk about one of theworst aspects of food and kids
(07:02):
packing school lunches everysingle day forever.
I started with the girls at twoyears old in preschool and
continued until the end of highschool.
That's 16 years each of schoollunches.
I don't dare count how manymeals that is or how many
minutes I spent on it, but themath of it is outrageous.
(07:25):
And I assure you, I am not aPinterest worthy lunch making
mom.
There was some sort of proteinplus a fruit and a chip of some
sort.
No fun drawings, very few lovenotes, no sandwiches, cut in
heart shapes.
Of course, the girls likeddifferent things and they got
more demanding as they gotolder.
Once suddenly, Nutella andapples won't cut it, but they
(07:47):
want yummy salads with chickenin it and dressing on the side.
For some reason I made lunchesin the morning, still do, rather
than late at night.
I don't like the idea of lunchsitting around in the fridge all
evening and then you have tomove the chips into it in the
morning.
Anyway, I don't know, but Istill get up with Maggie every
morning to make her lunch, andI'm not even frankly sure how
(08:08):
much my kids ate all thoseyears, but I know they refused.
The school provided meals andtherefore I fed them.
During sports season, I oftenthrew in an extra snack, just a
bar of some sort.
Again, who can handle this Everyday?
I was not going crazy.
And we've been through everyversion of a lunchbox, lunch bag
and Bento box, hot thermos andcold water bottles.
(08:32):
We've been friendly to theenvironment and then gone
through months of plasticsandwich bags.
Frankly, I love the summers whenthey've been at camp and I
didn't have to make lunch.
And I look forward to the daywhen Maggie two goes to college
and I don't have to make themanymore.
And for the record, David andthe girls have each volunteered
to make lunches, but I knowtheir commitments won't last.
(08:53):
So I've taken on the dutybegrudgingly, lovingly.
But the real challenge, the bossBattle of Motherhood is dinner
every single night forever.
It starts simple enough, what doyou want for dinner?
But then they get older anddevelop preferences and opinions
(09:15):
and dietary restrictions thatseem to change based on the
weather.
Monday, I love spaghetti.
Tuesday, I hate spaghetti.
It's gross.
Wednesday.
Can we have spaghetti Thursday?
Why'd you put sauce on it?
It's not just one kid withmultiple children, and my
husband, who's a picky eater,i'm basically running a short
order kitchen at times.
(09:37):
I started meal planning like Iwas coordinating a military
operation.
Sunday afternoons withcookbooks, grocery lists, and a
calendar trying to figure outhow to feed my family without
repeating the same five mealsevery week.
Tuesday's, taco Tuesday.
Of course, Wednesday's leftovernight though let's be
honest.
It's really fend for yourself.
Whatever's in the fridge.
(09:58):
Thursday is some sort of chickensituation.
Friday, maybe we'll have pastaor pizza'cause those are easy.
But then they hit middle schooland suddenly become food critics
after the toddler food criticphase.
This sauce tastes different.
Why is this chicken dry?
I like mac and cheese better atthe local restaurant.
Why can't you cook like Sophia'smom?
(10:20):
Sorry.
I wish I was my mom's generationthat said I made this and you're
gonna eat it or not eat it atall.
But alas, I gave into theirwhims.
The worst part, even when youdon't cook, when you say, let's
just order something, you stillhave to decide what to order.
And if you suggest something,you get this look like you just
(10:42):
ruined their lives with yourdumpling suggestion.
Now through all of this chaos,you're supposed to be teaching
them about healthy eating andbalanced nutrition.
You're supposed to model goodeating habits while
simultaneously convincing themthat vegetables won't actually
kill them.
Children need steady fuel fromcomplex carbs, healthy fats for
(11:03):
brain development, and proteinfor growth.
Yeah, try explaining that to afive-year-old who's convinced
that chicken nuggets are avegetable because they're not
red meat.
The American Academy ofPediatrics makes it super
helpful.
Apparently kids are supposed toget five servings of fruits and
vegetables every day.
Five.
(11:23):
Do you know how hard it is toget five servings into a kid who
thinks ketchup is a vegetable?
I tried everything.
I hid vegetables and food, butthey tasted the spinach through
the strawberries, a banana.
I let them dip their vegetablesin ketchup.
They wouldn't do it.
I tried the, you have to try onebite rule, which led to the most
dramatic ganging performancesyou've ever seen, and don't ask
(11:46):
how many P airplanes I hadcoming at them.
Here comes the airplane, thenutritious P airplane.
It didn't work.
Here's the thing about kids inhealthy eating, they're watching
everything you do.
If you're stress eating cookiesat 10:00 PM which we've all
done, they notice if you skipmeals because you're too busy
(12:07):
making sure everyone else eats.
They notice that too.
So I had to learn to model thebehavior I wanted to see.
As I said, family dinners becamesacred.
No phones, no tv, justconversation and connection over
food.
I always made sure to servevegetables and salad with the
meals.
I always made sure there wasprotein at every meal.
(12:29):
Research shows that kids who eatregular family meals have better
nutrition, higher self-esteem,and lower rates of eating
disorders later in life.
Even if that food was spaghettifor the fifth time this month.
And here's what saved my sanityand actually worked.
Them involved in the kitchenFrom an early age, I always
(12:50):
exposed both girls to cooking,not because I had some grand
plan and not because they wereall that helpful.
It was to kill time, keep themactive, and they were curious
about what I was doing.
VE actually fell in love withcooking.
She's the one who willexperiment with flavors, try new
techniques, watch cooking showsfor fun.
(13:11):
And Maggie's a good baker.
She loves the precision ofmeasuring the science of how
ingredients work together tocreate something delicious.
And frankly, she loves the tasteof chocolate.
When they help make something,even if their help was just
stirring the sauce twice andmaking an enormous mess, they
were more likely to eat it.
There's something aboutownership that changes the whole
(13:32):
dynamic.
And we talk about, yeah, foodwhile we cooked, but more
importantly, we talk about theirday, their friends, their
worries.
The kitchen became the spacewhere we connected over more
than just food.
And now Ava's excited to finallyhave a college apartment this
year and cook much better thancafeterias and dorm rooms.
And both girls often send mepictures of the meals they make
(13:55):
when I have other plans.
Maggie often makes the dessertwith her friends.
Ava and her friends often focuson the pasta.
So let's move on to the harderconversations.
What do you do when your childis struggling with their weight?
Either over or under.
How do you address it withoutcreating food issues or body
(14:15):
image problems?
My children have a timestruggled.
We all have, and it'sheartbreaking.
Your first worry isn't eventheir health.
It's a concern that they lookdifferent and kids can be so
cruel about that.
Then how do you talk to a9-year-old about healthy eating
without making them feel badabout their body?
And how do you encourage betterchoices without creating shame
(14:37):
about food?
So we focus on health, notappearance.
Let's eat foods that give usenergy for sports practice.
Let's make sure we're gettingstrong bones with calcium, we
talk about food as fuel, not asgood or bad.
And on the flip side, I had afriend dealing with kids who
were underweight, who wouldn'teat enough, who were picky.
(14:57):
The point of malnutrition, thejudgment goes both ways and it's
all heartbreaking.
And with teenage girls, it'sreally complicated.
Suddenly, it's not just aboutnutrition, it's about social
influences, body image, and peerpressure around food.
You can hear 13 year olds havingconversations that belong in a
diet clinic, not a middle schoolcafeteria.
(15:20):
The truth is, every kid isdifferent and every body is
different.
Our job isn't to create perfecteaters.
Kudos to you if you have.
It's to create humans who have ahealthy relationship with food
and their bodies.
So to that point, I'm gonna makea little plug here.
If you're at the stage like me,where you wanna set your kid up
(15:41):
for success and pass down yourfamily recipes, or if you're
ever struggling with what am Igonna make tonight?
So you text a friend or familymember to say What's on your
menu?
I need to get inspired.
And if you've ever needed tocrowdsource easy, weaken I ideas
without judgment, then you'regonna love what I'm working on.
I'm working on an app calledFork and Tell that's designed to
(16:05):
help families do exactly this.
The app is meant to help solvethat daily.
What should we eat?
Question while also helping youlog and share those meaningful
family recipes.
Fork And Tell is a digitalplatform that lets you collect
and share recipes within yourprivate circle.
Think a space where your bestfriend's go-to salmon lives, or
(16:28):
your sister-in-law's pastarecipe, or your grandmother's
chicken soup recipe that you cannow pass down to your own
children.
It's all in one place,organized, searchable, and real
life tested.
It's like a group chat, met arecipe px.
We're trying to create somethingthat bridges the gap between the
practical, what am I making fordinner tonight?
(16:50):
And the meaningful, how do Ikeep these food traditions alive
for my kids?
Because here's what I'velearned.
Food isn't just fuel, it'sconnection, it's culture.
It's the way we show love andcreate memories.
That's when you realize that allthose years of fighting about
vegetables, all those packedlunches and all those family
dinners where you felt like ashort order cook, it actually
(17:13):
worked.
They learned they were watching.
They do know how to feedthemselves nutritious meals,
even if they choose not tosometimes.
So stay tuned.
Fork and Tell is coming soon,and it might just save dinner or
at least keep you from makingthat same damn lemon chicken
again.
(17:33):
So now that my kids are older,they are not at all that picky,
although David, my husband, andhe actually remained.
So that said, one kid prefersmeat, one fish, one likes a
cream sauce, the other, a tomatobased sauce.
One likes things crisp in theoven, the other prefers things
not so bait.
It's never ending.
(17:55):
The truth about feeding a familyis that it's not really about
the food, it's about love.
It's about family dinners whereyou argue about homework and
laugh about the day.
Disasters, it's about teachingthem that food brings people
together.
That cooking is an act of loveand that sharing a meal is
sacred it's about all thosepacked lunches with little notes
(18:15):
tucked inside.
It's about birthday cakes.
That didn't turn out quiteright, but were made with all
your heart.
Oh God, I should show youpictures of those.
It's about teaching them thathome isn't just a place, it's
wherever someone you love iswilling to make you a snack.
So to all the moms out there inthe trenches of meal planning
and grocery shopping and packinglunches, and answering the
(18:35):
internal question, what's fordinner?
You're not just feeding theirbodies, you're feeding their
souls.
You're creating memories, andyou're building traditions.
You taught them how to care forthemselves and others.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I needto go figure out what's for
dinner tonight.
Thanks for listening to I Get ItFrom My Mom.
Until next time, keep feedingyour families and yourself with
(18:59):
love, patience, and maybe alittle wine with dinner.
Welcome back to, I Get It fromMy mom, the podcast where we
talk about the things parentsand children should be talking
about, but sometimes avoid.
I'm Elissa host mom, groceryshopper for my family, and
someone who has spent the lastGod knows how many adult years
answering the same questionevery single day.
(00:22):
What's for dinner?
Today I'm flying solo again.
No Ava, no Maggie, just me andmy war stories from the trenches
of feeding a family.
And let me tell you, it's been ajourney from breastfeeding
battles to teenage DoorDash,bills that require a second
mortgage where covering it all.
(00:43):
Here's the thing about feedingkids.
It's never really just about thefood.
It's about love, control,tradition, and somehow always
running out of the, and somehowalways running out of the one
ingredient you definitely boughtyesterday.
Let's get into it.
(01:13):
So let's start at the verybeginning.
I felt really strongly aboutbreastfeeding, not in a
judgmental way toward othermoms, but for me personally, it
felt important.
It seemed like the reason femalemammals in nature have breasts,
and as someone whose tatas areon the rather large side, I felt
(01:33):
they were likely intended tofeed an army, so I wanted to
give it my best shot.
Honestly, the science behind,it's pretty incredible.
Breast milk contains over 200components, proteins, fats,
antibodies, and amazingly, itchanges composition throughout
the day and as your baby grows,it's like having a personal
(01:54):
nutritionist working 24 7 insideyour body.
But the reality of making itwork, even for just six months
with both girls, wasn't all thatpretty.
You constantly question how muchthey're getting since you can't
truly measure what's coming outas a result, sometimes you feel
like you're all boobs all daysince you just assume every time
(02:17):
the baby cries, they're hungry.
There's the leaking, the nipple,cracking the dripping nurse milk
down your stomach, having towalk away from friends and
family to go to the other roomto feed so you don't expose your
nipples to your father-in-law.
Then there was the pumping, thefrozen milk, the crying over
literal spilled milk, thebottles and nipple sizes, I can
(02:41):
still recall the sound of mypump felt like a cow getting
milked.
Hopefully the technology is alittle better today.
I remember pumping and dumpingat my sister's bachelorette
party in Atlantic City, NewJersey.
Yes.
Dumping liquid gold becausealcohol and breast milk don't
(03:03):
mix, but a girl's just gottahave fun, right?
My cousin, also a new mom, and Iliterally had a pump and dump
after party in our hotel roomthat night.
And here's where it getscomplicated.
Ava had reflux, not colic, butreflux and feeding became this
whole production.
She'd eat, then scream, thenprojectile, vomit everywhere
(03:26):
we're talking.
Outfit changes for both of us,sometimes multiple times a day.
Poor baby and poor mommy.
At six months with both girls, Itransitioned to formula.
Fed is best and so was my mentaland physical health.
With Ava, of course, we had totry multiple formulas before we
found one that was pre-digestedand agreed with her stomach.
(03:50):
It was stinky on the way in andon the way out, but she
tolerated it.
Okay.
Maggie was far easier in thistransition, and frankly, with
her, I just wasn't producingbreast milk the way I had
initially, so it was time tomove on.
So, while the research showsthat breast milk has incredible
benefits, formula fed babiesgrow up totally fine and what
(04:12):
might be right for one mothermay not be right for the other,
and that's fine too.
Anyone who judges you for howyou feed your baby clearly has
too much time on their hands andshould probably get a hobby as
for me.
I'm glad I did it as motherNature intended, but as you can
tell, I was definitely notsomeone who was in love with it
(04:33):
at all.
Fast forward six months andwe're entering the wonderful
world of solid foods.
The stage one, those singleingredient purees, rice, cereal,
sweet potatoes, bananas.
Both my kids liked the sweetstuff, the fruits, and hated the
veggies.
So all veggies somehow got mixedwith fruits and I probably
(04:53):
screwed my kids in their tastebuds.
I learned later, somethingfascinating about kids and
tastes.
Children have about 30,000 tastebuds compared to our adult
10,000.
That's why they're so sensitiveto bitter flavors and
vegetables.
Their taste preferences areliterally hardwired differently
than ours.
So it does take many exposuresto foods to get a kid to like
(05:16):
it.
And I probably gave up way tooeasily.
Ava as many do with the firstchild.
I pureed and made my own babyfood.
That lasted maybe a few weekstops, and then we just spent too
much money on organic jarredstuff from the specialty grocery
store.
The combinations were not ones Iwould've cooked, but she and
(05:39):
Maggie both ate them.
I frankly remember lots of thoseGerber puffs and lots of
Cheerios stuck in the strollerand car seats at that age.
And then the toddler phase waswhen my children became food
critics.
The chicken nuggets are toocrispy.
No wait.
They're not crispy enough.
This banana's too squishy.
This sandwich is cut wrong.
(05:59):
It's supposed to be triangles,not rectangles.
And God forbid the crusts aren'tcut off.
Everything had to have its ownsection on the plate like we
were running a tiny segregatedcafeteria.
But here's the one thing we gotright in all of this, and I
repeat the one.
The only one thing we got right.
(06:19):
We never allowed screen timeduring meals.
We made sure we or someone satwith the girls and talked with
them every time they ate.
Even if we had dinner later thanthem, after we returned from
work, we still had them sit withus to understand how a family
dinner time went and to maybetry what we were having to eat
or fruit or dessert while wetalked about our days.
(06:41):
We have never been perfectlyhealthy eaters and we definitely
order in or eat out too much andenjoy too many carbs with our
meals.
But we tried to model goodeating etiquette and behavior,
and still to this day we dofamily dinner time as much as
our schedules allow.
So can we talk about one of theworst aspects of food and kids
(07:02):
packing school lunches everysingle day forever.
I started with the girls at twoyears old in preschool and
continued until the end of highschool.
That's 16 years each of schoollunches.
I don't dare count how manymeals that is or how many
minutes I spent on it, but themath of it is outrageous.
(07:25):
And I assure you, I am not aPinterest worthy lunch making
mom.
There was some sort of proteinplus a fruit and a chip of some
sort.
No fun drawings, very few lovenotes, no sandwiches, cut in
heart shapes.
Of course, the girls likeddifferent things and they got
more demanding as they gotolder.
Once suddenly, Nutella andapples won't cut it, but they
(07:47):
want yummy salads with chickenin it and dressing on the side.
For some reason I made lunchesin the morning, still do, rather
than late at night.
I don't like the idea of lunchsitting around in the fridge all
evening and then you have tomove the chips into it in the
morning.
Anyway, I don't know, but Istill get up with Maggie every
morning to make her lunch, andI'm not even frankly sure how
(08:08):
much my kids ate all thoseyears, but I know they refused.
The school provided meals andtherefore I fed them.
During sports season, I oftenthrew in an extra snack, just a
bar of some sort.
Again, who can handle this Everyday?
I was not going crazy.
And we've been through everyversion of a lunchbox, lunch bag
and Bento box, hot thermos andcold water bottles.
(08:32):
We've been friendly to theenvironment and then gone
through months of plasticsandwich bags.
Frankly, I love the summers whenthey've been at camp and I
didn't have to make lunch.
And I look forward to the daywhen Maggie two goes to college
and I don't have to make themanymore.
And for the record, David andthe girls have each volunteered
to make lunches, but I knowtheir commitments won't last.
(08:53):
So I've taken on the dutybegrudgingly, lovingly.
But the real challenge, the bossBattle of Motherhood is dinner
every single night forever.
It starts simple enough, what doyou want for dinner?
But then they get older anddevelop preferences and opinions
(09:15):
and dietary restrictions thatseem to change based on the
weather.
Monday, I love spaghetti.
Tuesday, I hate spaghetti.
It's gross.
Wednesday.
Can we have spaghetti Thursday?
Why'd you put sauce on it?
It's not just one kid withmultiple children, and my
husband, who's a picky eater,i'm basically running a short
order kitchen at times.
(09:37):
I started meal planning like Iwas coordinating a military
operation.
Sunday afternoons withcookbooks, grocery lists, and a
calendar trying to figure outhow to feed my family without
repeating the same five mealsevery week.
Tuesday's, taco Tuesday.
Of course, Wednesday's leftovernight though let's be
honest.
It's really fend for yourself.
Whatever's in the fridge.
(09:58):
Thursday is some sort of chickensituation.
Friday, maybe we'll have pastaor pizza'cause those are easy.
But then they hit middle schooland suddenly become food critics
after the toddler food criticphase.
This sauce tastes different.
Why is this chicken dry?
I like mac and cheese better atthe local restaurant.
Why can't you cook like Sophia'smom?
(10:20):
Sorry.
I wish I was my mom's generationthat said I made this and you're
gonna eat it or not eat it atall.
But alas, I gave into theirwhims.
The worst part, even when youdon't cook, when you say, let's
just order something, you stillhave to decide what to order.
And if you suggest something,you get this look like you just
(10:42):
ruined their lives with yourdumpling suggestion.
Now through all of this chaos,you're supposed to be teaching
them about healthy eating andbalanced nutrition.
You're supposed to model goodeating habits while
simultaneously convincing themthat vegetables won't actually
kill them.
Children need steady fuel fromcomplex carbs, healthy fats for
(11:03):
brain development, and proteinfor growth.
Yeah, try explaining that to afive-year-old who's convinced
that chicken nuggets are avegetable because they're not
red meat.
The American Academy ofPediatrics makes it super
helpful.
Apparently kids are supposed toget five servings of fruits and
vegetables every day.
Five.
(11:23):
Do you know how hard it is toget five servings into a kid who
thinks ketchup is a vegetable?
I tried everything.
I hid vegetables and food, butthey tasted the spinach through
the strawberries, a banana.
I let them dip their vegetablesin ketchup.
They wouldn't do it.
I tried the, you have to try onebite rule, which led to the most
dramatic ganging performancesyou've ever seen, and don't ask
(11:46):
how many P airplanes I hadcoming at them.
Here comes the airplane, thenutritious P airplane.
It didn't work.
Here's the thing about kids inhealthy eating, they're watching
everything you do.
If you're stress eating cookiesat 10:00 PM which we've all
done, they notice if you skipmeals because you're too busy
(12:07):
making sure everyone else eats.
They notice that too.
So I had to learn to model thebehavior I wanted to see.
As I said, family dinners becamesacred.
No phones, no tv, justconversation and connection over
food.
I always made sure to servevegetables and salad with the
meals.
I always made sure there wasprotein at every meal.
(12:29):
Research shows that kids who eatregular family meals have better
nutrition, higher self-esteem,and lower rates of eating
disorders later in life.
Even if that food was spaghettifor the fifth time this month.
And here's what saved my sanityand actually worked.
Them involved in the kitchenFrom an early age, I always
(12:50):
exposed both girls to cooking,not because I had some grand
plan and not because they wereall that helpful.
It was to kill time, keep themactive, and they were curious
about what I was doing.
VE actually fell in love withcooking.
She's the one who willexperiment with flavors, try new
techniques, watch cooking showsfor fun.
(13:11):
And Maggie's a good baker.
She loves the precision ofmeasuring the science of how
ingredients work together tocreate something delicious.
And frankly, she loves the tasteof chocolate.
When they help make something,even if their help was just
stirring the sauce twice andmaking an enormous mess, they
were more likely to eat it.
There's something aboutownership that changes the whole
(13:32):
dynamic.
And we talk about, yeah, foodwhile we cooked, but more
importantly, we talk about theirday, their friends, their
worries.
The kitchen became the spacewhere we connected over more
than just food.
And now Ava's excited to finallyhave a college apartment this
year and cook much better thancafeterias and dorm rooms.
And both girls often send mepictures of the meals they make
(13:55):
when I have other plans.
Maggie often makes the dessertwith her friends.
Ava and her friends often focuson the pasta.
So let's move on to the harderconversations.
What do you do when your childis struggling with their weight?
Either over or under.
How do you address it withoutcreating food issues or body
(14:15):
image problems?
My children have a timestruggled.
We all have, and it'sheartbreaking.
Your first worry isn't eventheir health.
It's a concern that they lookdifferent and kids can be so
cruel about that.
Then how do you talk to a9-year-old about healthy eating
without making them feel badabout their body?
And how do you encourage betterchoices without creating shame
(14:37):
about food?
So we focus on health, notappearance.
Let's eat foods that give usenergy for sports practice.
Let's make sure we're gettingstrong bones with calcium, we
talk about food as fuel, not asgood or bad.
And on the flip side, I had afriend dealing with kids who
were underweight, who wouldn'teat enough, who were picky.
(14:57):
The point of malnutrition, thejudgment goes both ways and it's
all heartbreaking.
And with teenage girls, it'sreally complicated.
Suddenly, it's not just aboutnutrition, it's about social
influences, body image, and peerpressure around food.
You can hear 13 year olds havingconversations that belong in a
diet clinic, not a middle schoolcafeteria.
(15:20):
The truth is, every kid isdifferent and every body is
different.
Our job isn't to create perfecteaters.
Kudos to you if you have.
It's to create humans who have ahealthy relationship with food
and their bodies.
So to that point, I'm gonna makea little plug here.
If you're at the stage like me,where you wanna set your kid up
(15:41):
for success and pass down yourfamily recipes, or if you're
ever struggling with what am Igonna make tonight?
So you text a friend or familymember to say What's on your
menu?
I need to get inspired.
And if you've ever needed tocrowdsource easy, weaken I ideas
without judgment, then you'regonna love what I'm working on.
I'm working on an app calledFork and Tell that's designed to
(16:05):
help families do exactly this.
The app is meant to help solvethat daily.
What should we eat?
Question while also helping youlog and share those meaningful
family recipes.
Fork And Tell is a digitalplatform that lets you collect
and share recipes within yourprivate circle.
Think a space where your bestfriend's go-to salmon lives, or
(16:28):
your sister-in-law's pastarecipe, or your grandmother's
chicken soup recipe that you cannow pass down to your own
children.
It's all in one place,organized, searchable, and real
life tested.
It's like a group chat, met arecipe px.
We're trying to create somethingthat bridges the gap between the
practical, what am I making fordinner tonight?
(16:50):
And the meaningful, how do Ikeep these food traditions alive
for my kids?
Because here's what I'velearned.
Food isn't just fuel, it'sconnection, it's culture.
It's the way we show love andcreate memories.
That's when you realize that allthose years of fighting about
vegetables, all those packedlunches and all those family
dinners where you felt like ashort order cook, it actually
(17:13):
worked.
They learned they were watching.
They do know how to feedthemselves nutritious meals,
even if they choose not tosometimes.
So stay tuned.
Fork and Tell is coming soon,and it might just save dinner or
at least keep you from makingthat same damn lemon chicken
again.
(17:33):
So now that my kids are older,they are not at all that picky,
although David, my husband, andhe actually remained.
So that said, one kid prefersmeat, one fish, one likes a
cream sauce, the other, a tomatobased sauce.
One likes things crisp in theoven, the other prefers things
not so bait.
It's never ending.
(17:55):
The truth about feeding a familyis that it's not really about
the food, it's about love.
It's about family dinners whereyou argue about homework and
laugh about the day.
Disasters, it's about teachingthem that food brings people
together.
That cooking is an act of loveand that sharing a meal is
sacred it's about all thosepacked lunches with little notes
(18:15):
tucked inside.
It's about birthday cakes.
That didn't turn out quiteright, but were made with all
your heart.
Oh God, I should show youpictures of those.
It's about teaching them thathome isn't just a place, it's
wherever someone you love iswilling to make you a snack.
So to all the moms out there inthe trenches of meal planning
and grocery shopping and packinglunches, and answering the
(18:35):
internal question, what's fordinner?
You're not just feeding theirbodies, you're feeding their
souls.
You're creating memories, andyou're building traditions.
You taught them how to care forthemselves and others.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I needto go figure out what's for
dinner tonight.
Thanks for listening to I Get ItFrom My Mom.
Until next time, keep feedingyour families and yourself with
(18:59):
love, patience, and maybe alittle wine with dinner.
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