April 29, 2025 • 22 mins
Episode 8: Maggie's Sweet 16: Navigating Babyhood, Childhood, Teen Years, and What’s Next
In this very special episode of I Get It From My Mom, we’re celebrating Maggie’s Sweet 16—with lots of laughs and memories.
Elissa, Ava, and Maggie take a heartfelt (and hilarious) walk down memory lane, from Maggie’s early baby years, through the middle school challenges of COVID, to the confident, independent young woman she is today. We talk about:
✅ What Maggie was like as a baby, toddler, and little kid
✅ How COVID shaped her middle school years and friendships
✅ Finding independence in high school and building her own identity
✅ A fun Q&A about Maggie’s dreams for college, career, and family
✅ Big lessons for parents and teens about growing up, supporting each other, and celebrating milestones
Whether you’re a parent raising a teenager, a teen navigating growing pains, or just someone who loves a good coming-of-age story, this episode will make you smile—and maybe tear up a little too.
🎧 Listen now and help us wish Maggie the happiest Sweet 16!
Takeaways:
📌 Parents—don’t wait for birthdays to tell your kids how proud you are.
📌 Teens—your path is your own. You get to write your story, one chapter at a time.
📌 Everyone—celebrate the people you love loudly, often, and with chocolate cake.
👉 Follow us on Instagram @i.get.it.from.mymom and share your favorite memories from your 16th year!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
Hey everyone, it's me, Maggie,and this week I'm taking over
the intro because it's mybirthday and honestly, what
better time to make it all aboutme?
Yep.
It's all about you.
Maggie.
Welcome back to, I Get It frommy mom, where we have the
conversations moms and daughtersshould probably be having, but
with a little more honesty and alittle more sass.
(00:22):
I'm Ava Maggie's older sister,and I've had the spotlight for
18 years, so I'm generouslyletting her borrow with this
episode.
How kind.
And I'm officially turning 16 onApril 30th.
So today's episode is kind of atrip down memory lane, a
celebration and reflection ofthe best topic ever.
Me.
We'll talk about how you cameinto our lives, how you grew up.
(00:45):
What you've taught us and whereyou're headed next.
'cause growing up isn't justabout cake and candles, as much
as we love those, it's aboutfinding your voice, owning your
story, and figuring out who youwanna be.
So whether you're a littlesibling, a big sibling, a proud
parent, or just someone tryingto survive the teenage years,
this one's for you.
Happy birthday, Maggie.
(01:07):
Thanks.
Let's get into it.
Let's start at the beginning.
Maggie, you were planned,wanted, wish for and time just
right.
That's how I'm often described.
(01:27):
Wish for, planned to wish for.
My sister and I were nearlythree years apart, and that's
how we planned for the two ofyou.
But you guys did think Maggiewas gonna be a boy, right?
Yes.
My second pregnancy seemed mucheasier.
No offense, Ava, I gained lessweight.
I carried her very much like abasketball, so it just seemed
different from yours, Ava.
So while we waited until birthto know the gender for both of
(01:49):
you, we did guess that Maggiewas gonna be a boy.
But sure enough, on April 30th,2009, the doctor exclaimed.
It's a girl.
Were you and dad disappointed?
I wasn't a boy disappointed.
No.
I think part of us wanted a sonsince we already had a daughter,
and it would be nice to haveboth.
And you know, daddy's such aguy's guy and loves sports, and
(02:10):
I'm sure would've loved a son toshare that with.
But I also know how close twosisters can be.
So for Ava's sake, I wanted youto be a girl.
Either way.
We were just happy and excitedto have a healthy baby.
And what exactly is the story ofmy name Maggie Rose.
That's a good question.
Not so much a story necessarily.
We frankly, just like somewhatless.
(02:31):
Modern names or even older namesthat were back in style and we
liked ones that ended in vowelsfor girls.
And for some reason with you Iwas hooked on an M.
So Maggie's a bitunconventional, so it, since it
is your given name and you havenot, Margaret, although I know
people always so many questionsto ask you about Margaret, but
we thought it worked for a girland for someone who's older, so
(02:52):
we went with it.
And Rose was for yourgreat-grandmother who passed
only days before you were born,and we do know that our boy name
was going to be Wesley, which isnow our dog's name.
So glad you got to finally useit.
Yeah, well it was your gonna beboy name too.
So Wesley's the dog, does thatmean you two always wanted two
kids?
Yes.
Dad and I each came from afamily of two kids.
(03:13):
We each have a sister, so that'swhat we knew.
Plus I have two hands, or thereare two of us.
We like the idea of never beingoutnumbered.
I think I look like you now.
Did I look like you when I wasborn?
Well, when Ava was born, shelooked just like dad.
No doubt about it.
You, Maggie, were certainly morewhat I expected my child to look
like.
Your face was a little around oryou had dark hair.
(03:36):
I'd say you definitely look morelike my family.
Mostly like Grammy actually.
I honestly don't really rememberanything about her being born.
I was so young, but was I goodwith her?
Was she a good baby?
Um, yeah.
Maggie was a relatively easybaby again compared to Ava,
which we'll focus on for yourbirthday.
VE in a moment, right?
Very flexible as a second childso she could nap anywhere and
(03:59):
got schlepped around withwhatever your schedule was.
Ava, she didn't sleep throughthe night until almost one years
old, but at least when she wokeup to feed, she was happy and
went to bed fairly easily.
And Ava, you were actually agreat big sister.
There was never an issue.
Once the second kid comesaround, you sadly, as a parent,
need the first one to grow up abit and do some things on their
(04:19):
own.
So we made sure that things likeyour snacks or juice boxes were
very accessible for you sinceyou invariably.
Always needed something theminute I sat down to nurse
Maggie.
Uh, and we made the focus ofeverything we do still.
You, we moved you to a big girlroom and got rid of your
pacifiers and had you pottytrained even before Maggie came
along.
We never made you help or takecare of her unless you wanted to
(04:41):
be involved.
But you didn't show any signs ofjealousy, and you were always
good with Maggie and she adoredyou.
At the beginning.
She would just stare at you andthen it turned into giggling at
you, and then eventually it wasjust copying everything you did.
Now I wanna know more about whatI was like as a baby, like what
was my first word?
I'm pretty sure it was.
No, at least that's how Iremember it.
(05:03):
Which I think reflects a lotabout your personality.
Were there like certain thingsit was attached to growing up?
Yes.
You know, you always loved yourpacifier.
Your paci.
That was a process to get rid ofeventually.
Um, and you had your stuffedbear, which you still haven't
sleep with, although now Ibelieve you call him snowy and
not bear.
But to tell you the truth,Maggie, and I hate to say it, I
(05:24):
think this is actually the thirdbear.
Version.
Wait, really?
This was with us since Bear waslike, I think, knew that since
Maggie was like three, we've hadthis bear bear when I was three
versus if I was like six, then Iwould be concerned.
But he's been around a longtime.
When did I crawl and walk ortalk?
All was pretty much on time.
You sat up in about six months.
You crawled out like eightmonths.
(05:45):
You walked by 14 months andbefore that you were a long time
of kind of standing up andholding on and moving around,
but before walking was 14months.
You had words before a year andyou were stringing words
together.
Well, before two years old I wasquite, very advanced.
And what did I call you soadvanced.
Um, let's see.
You called me mama, dad, and Avawas weirdly.
(06:06):
Ah, yeah.
Although eventually you learnhow to say Ava and you went
through a phase where youactually called me EMA when you
were in preschool.
Was I a friendly child?
Was I good with other people?
Um, you were definitely more onthe shy side, not with kids, but
with adults.
You took a bit to warm up topeople, I feel, feel like maybe
you still do a little bit.
Yeah.
Um, and you're a bit more of a.
(06:28):
Whoops.
And then your sister Ava wasalways gung-ho, would try
everything, jump at everything.
You were more cautious and didthings at your own pace, which
is perfectly fine.
Again, I think you're still alittle like that.
Let other people go first.
You could see how they do, thenyou'll do it.
Well, I think I sounded like theperfect baby.
Absolutely.
Perfect.
(06:48):
You weren't just a sweet baby,you were a fun little kid,
curious, observant, cute asanything.
Other kids like to play withyou, and teachers loved you.
They always said your behaviorwas excellent and you were super
helpful.
I definitely had some bestfriends of my own, some in
preschool, and then again inelementary school.
I do remember always likingschool, but I also really
struggled with my handwriting,didn't I?
(07:09):
Yeah.
Dad's still convinced you're notreally a lefty, but just a bad
rightie.
Who's faking it?
I like to argue I'mambidextrous.
I can do most things with twohands.
All right.
Not right though.
Not right.
Can't really do it with either.
Yeah, and it's, I can do sportswith right hands.
We had to get you services foroccupational therapy.
You were very bright kid, butwe're not very good at
translating what was in yourbrain down to something on the
(07:30):
paper.
I mean, frankly, yourhandwriting was.
Illegible, which was crazy, butthis may be a good lesson for
other parents.
We knew Maggie needed help and Ihad to have countless meetings
with the Department of Educationof New York and Maggie's school
to fight for her to get thoseservices.
They were convinced that sinceshe was fairly bright and wasn't
critical to address her OTneeds.
(07:52):
But you know, we fiercely foughtand argued and advocated for you
for years.
I mean, we were in meeting aftermeeting about this.
So my advice to parents is ifyou sense your child needs
something or if a test doesn'tshow exactly what you want,
don't relax about it.
You know, don't hesitate to haveyour child tested for something
or fight for the services theyneed.
Ignore any stigma around it.
Best to address it when they'reyoung.
(08:15):
I don't ever remember reallygetting tested for it, but I
definitely remember doing OTwhen I needed it and getting
pulled outta class and havingall my fun fidget twice to
increase my hand strength.
Oh, it was so much fun.
Fidget.
I was always told my handcouldn't keep up with my brain,
so clearly I was very ahead.
Moving on.
I mean, me and Ava were alwayspretty close, right?
Yeah.
I mean, I, when I think aboutour childhood together, I just
(08:37):
remember us being best friends.
We were in the same school.
I remember getting rewarded atschool was that I get got to go
and see you.
I got to go to your danceclasses.
I remember we had play datestogether.
We had friends who were siblingstoo.
Yeah, that's when I think aboutmy childhood, I just remember
the two of us.
Absolutely.
I mean, so much of your liveswere obviously Yeah, just
(09:00):
together.
And it's funny'cause I look backand think of you as such an easy
kid, Maggie, you generally wentwith the flow, but I also think
as a second child we maybe justassumed you were cool with
everything going on around you.
Dad coached your softball and hecoached Davis' softball.
We signed you up for balletsince Ava had done it.
We sent you to sleep weightcamp.
Since Ava was there, I'm notsaying these were the wrong
(09:22):
decisions for you, but we kindof just maybe followed a
parenting formula.
Did we get it wrong?
I mean, I don't ever rememberbeing forced to do anything or
into different activities.
There were definitely things Iliked that Ava didn't I?
My love for stuffed animalsalways, but.
I dunno.
I feel like the sports I used toplay, I never liked TV shows or
(09:43):
movies as much as Ava didgrowing up.
I prefer a hands-on thing, agame, or an activity.
I did softball for a very longtime until I just determined
that it wasn't my sport.
I definitely did not like soccerwhen you signed me up for it.
But that was more me than Avaand I definitely did love camp.
I hated soccer.
I don't know.
I don't know if I ever didsoccer, but I hated it.
I have never liked soccer.
(10:04):
Um, but did you ever feel likepeople thought of you as Ava's
younger sister rather than justMaggie?
I don't think so.
Certainly not outside the house.
There were times in elementaryschool when all the kids in your
grade would know me at a asAva's little sister and at camp
sometimes too.
But I never felt like I was inyour shadow.
I always spoke up when I wantedto, said what I needed to, said
(10:26):
what's on my mind, and if Ididn't think something, I didn't
say it.
I just felt like I was doing myown thing and I was Ava's
younger sister, but I never feltlike I was being overshadowed by
her.
Truth of the matter, is thatsomething like camp, no one
probably remembers me, buteveryone remembers you.
You were there for much longerthan I did, so if anything, I'm
Maggie's sister now.
There you go.
And let's talk about the thingsyou did, voice that you wanted,
(10:46):
mags, do you remember all yourbirthday themes through the
years?
I definitely do all the ones athip ball park.
In the little party room, thebuild to bear theme, the frozen
theme, the little Olaf cardboardcutout I had.
The shirt I can picture theposters, the SpongeBob theme,
the unicorn theme, the candyland theme, all the activities
you would make like pin the hornon the unicorn and candy trivia,
(11:06):
and all your incredible artskills coming out.
What would be your theme thisyear if you had a party?
Definitely like money or clothesor makeup, something.
I like Starbucks, definitely.
And this is why you no longerhave birthday parties, max.
Then came middle school and withit covid.
(11:30):
Maggie, I think it's safe to saythat was the toughest time in
your life so far.
Definitely Covid hit as I wasjust finishing fifth grade,
which means I was starting at abrand new school from behind a
screen.
I didn't get to say bye to allmy friends I had when I was
younger and was now thrust intomiddle school where I didn't
know anyone.
I wasn't in a classroom, justsitting on my bed all day stuck
on a computer.
It was awful.
(11:50):
Yeah, it definitely was.
You went from being this supersocial connected kid to isolated
and quiet.
Yeah.
It was hard to watch.
You struggled socially, but.
Also, it seemed emotionally, it,it, it changed your rhythm.
I know it changed how you sawyourself for a while.
Yeah.
I definitely didn't know how tolike, fit in anymore.
I'm someone who needs to seepeople to be social.
(12:12):
Like not being able to do thatreally like disconnected me from
people and even my own voice.
I mean, maybe it was the normalpart of Tweenage time, but it
was like being stuck with all ofyou.
Maybe it was how disconnected Ifelt to the real world, but I
definitely struggled.
Yeah.
It was hard as a parent to watchyou change and not be yourself.
Do you think we should havehandled it better or addressed
(12:32):
it differently or not to make itabout us?
So said another way.
Is there advice you'd giveanother 11 or 12-year-old
struggling with loneliness andto their parents?
Um, I don't think you guys didanything wrong.
I think there probably couldhave been signs you could have
read a little further into tosee if I was doing okay, but I
think.
(12:52):
Growing up is hard, especiallyover covid.
It's different when you get togo to school every day.
When you're struggling withloneliness, you should just like
find your people.
I know that's easier said thandone, but like finding someone
you're friends with, findingsomeone you connect to.
Join every club, join everyevent, go to anything, see the
people that are there and justtry and talk to someone.
And so their parent, I thinkfocus on the signs if they're
(13:15):
really talkative and reallysocial.
And then they go through aperiod where they really can't
do that, like covid or they'rejust acting very differently.
Maybe check in and maybe it is adeeper issue.
Was there something that youfeel like helped you pull out of
it, or was it kind of just whenyou returned back to school?
I think returning to schoolreally helped.
I knew people who went to myschool and during Covid we would
(13:36):
have some days where we would goin person and some days not.
So I met people.
And by eighth grade, I feel likemy whole school was very close
with each other, or my wholegrade was, and I talked to
people every day and I sawpeople every day and made
friends and did stuff outside ofschool, which definitely helps
me feel more normal again.
So I think for you it's probablya combination of, it's a little
(13:57):
transition time anyway, fromlike elementary to middle.
It was also covid and then 11,12, 13 are years where kids are
finding themselves anyway,especially girls.
Right.
Definitely.
Yeah.
But that was good advice.
Okay, so now here you are.
16.
16 candles, confident.
You're funny, you're strong,you're chatty, you're loving a
(14:20):
completely original, fullyformed Maggie.
You chose a different highschool than Ava.
Have joined clubs and afterschool activities.
Have good friends.
Yeah, I definitely feel like inthe year that I went away, you
definitely changed a lot too.
There's all these things thatyou never used to like, that you
like now and you didn't neverwanted to do or try new foods
and then I'm gone and thensuddenly you're all open to
(14:42):
these new things.
Yeah, I feel like I'm able tosay I find finally truly my own
person and picking my own path.
It's nice to be the only childfor a bit.
I have amazing friends.
I'm doing well in school, and Ifigure out what I care about on
my terms.
You're so independent now, butyou still have a strong
connection to your family, whichwe love.
Of course.
And I appreciate the daily hugsI get because, no, I need them,
(15:03):
especially without if I needdouble, but I also know there's
plenty of times when you're notin the mood for all of us or too
much going on around you.
You're someone who.
We know it still needs yourspace and needs a load time, and
you still share things whenyou're ready and when you're in
the mood.
Yeah, I like to spend my timealone, sometimes lying in bed,
just relaxing and entertainingmyself with something I have in
(15:24):
my room, and don't always wantto be around people or getting
questioned or just having totalk about myself constantly.
So you're finishing yoursophomore year in high school
right now.
Is there something you'velearned these last two years of
school that you'd like toapproach how you change things
in maybe the next two years ofschool?
I think I've gotten better atstudying this year, like knowing
(15:45):
how to prepare for a test, doingwork on time.
During Covid.
Obviously all of that was veryhard, so now I kind of had to
relearn how to do it.
And I growing up was neverreally a kid who had to study.
I kind of always knew what wasgoing on, but after Covid I
definitely lost that train alittle.
So now it's kind of just gettingback into, this is now like
really school covid doesn'treally matter anymore.
(16:06):
So now it really is just schooland doing everything and doing
every test and seeing everybodyevery day and doing all my work.
And how about as you think aboutnow you're in the important
years of 11th to 12th grade.
Are there other things you'refocused on other than only
grades?
I think definitely coming inwith junior year for college,
I'm thinking about things I'mdoing outside of school, trying
(16:27):
to find jobs to do, trying tofind specific things that
interest me that I can focus onor do clubs for starter club,
join a team just to help prepareme for that.
Besides just keeping my gradesup, but also just finding who I
am and finding what I can dowith that Makes sense.
(16:47):
So, Maggie, if you don't mind,we'd love to dive into what
makes you tick a bit more andhow you think about the future.
So we're gonna ask you somequestions to put you on the
spot, which you'll just have tosuck up and go along with, even
if it's your birthday.
That sounds great.
Okay.
So what's your favorite subjectin school now and what do you
think you wanna study in collegeone day?
Um, I think my favorite subject.
(17:10):
It's probably like science oreven like global history.
I think I'm interested in likelearning things.
I like knowing things.
Definitely not, math is not mystrong suit.
I like learning history and likeknowing about it, like science
when I'm taking chemistry andyou like learn something.
I don't like math where it allbuilds on each other and I have
to know it all or remembereverything.
I don't like ELA.
I am not the best writer and Idon't love reading.
(17:33):
I don't really know what I wannastudy in college.
I've looked at like a politicalpolicy thing, a like a political
science thing, something thatkind of, I'm a very good
debater.
I love debating.
My favorite class is probablyethics.
To be fair, I love a Socraticseminar where I have to debate
my idea.
So I wanna do something where Ican fight for what I believe in,
(17:55):
talk for myself, talk with whatI think, talk with my ideas.
So you just wanna argue with usall the time.
Definitely.
I'll be honest.
Any idea on the type of collegeyou see yourself going to?
Um, I definitely want a schoolwith sports.
I like a spirit after going tocamp for so many years.
I need something I can cheer forand be spirited in.
I don't want a city aftergrowing up in a city, but I'd
(18:17):
like to be near a city'cause I'msomeone who gets bored very
easily and I would like to havesomething exciting to go out and
do.
Even on just weekends if it'slike a 40, 45 minute drive away.
But I definitely want somethinga little more rural and a little
campusy definitely, butdefinitely big inspira and maybe
near a city or just having agood town to do stuff in.
(18:40):
Makes sense.
So do you see yourself thenafter college, living in a city
or maybe more suburbs?
I think I definitely wanna raisea family in the city especially
after growing up as a teenagerin the city.
I know what it's like to be ableto get myself around and do my
own thing.
I mean, I trust myself.
Hopefully I'll be able to trustmy kids.
But I can't imagine having toone, drive everywhere and then
(19:00):
also drive my kids everywhere ifthey wanna go.
I really like the freedom andthe like diversity that being in
a city has taught us.
And I wanna grow up.
I wanna raise a family in thatsame setting.
I think the most importantquestion is, are you gonna have
a dog?
Definitely.
What about kids?
Do you know how many you want?
Got any names in the Notes app?
What are we thinking there?
(19:21):
I think similar to Mommy andDad.
Yeah, I grew up with onesibling.
I think I would like my kids tohave one sibling.
I also don't wanna beoutnumbered with kids.
I think four is a very goodnumber for.
Sitting in a car, sitting at arestaurant.
Four is just such like a goodeven number.
And I definitely like have nameswritten down, but I don't think
I've really thought through it.
Gotta keep, I'm really bad atlike, if I know someone with
(19:42):
that name, I can't name my kidthat.
'cause then I just constantlythink of them.
You gotta keep'em a secret.
Don't share.
I really need to be likedifferent.
Don't steal'em.
One people steal, or two,they'll have opinions and nobody
wants opinions.
That's true.
Like, you name me Ava.
And then suddenly everyone'snamed Eva.
Everyone.
Ava.
I did not know that.
Sorry.
Maggie's a little.
Maggie's has a nice nickname.
I like my name.
Yeah.
(20:02):
Although she recently metanother Maggie Klein.
That's true.
If you think about the future,let's say like the next five
years or so, what would you sayyou're most worried about and
what are you most excited for?
I think obviously what I'm mostworried about is getting into
college and then obviously whatI'm most excited about is going
into college.
I think it's definitely astressful experience to have to
(20:23):
wait around and see what you gotinto and then like pack forward
and decide if where you wanna gofor the next four years of your
life.
But it's definitely somethingI'm excited for.
I don't really know what elseHAP is happening in the next
five years of my life besidescollege, what I have to look
forward to in graduating highschool.
But it's kind of a mix ofemotions for both things.
Well, obviously I think weshould circle back to the most
(20:44):
important thing, your birthday.
We didn't overly plan anythingthis year.
Your birthday's also in themiddle of the week, but let's
say it's a weekend.
What is your perfect birthday?
I think it would be like hangingout with friends in the morning.
I'm a really good, I like gifts.
I like opening things that are,for me, I'm really bad at
(21:04):
reacting to gifts.
Yeah.
But I like getting things thatare for me, even though I am
really excited, I'll just belike.
Thanks, but.
I like getting gifts.
I think it would be surroundingmyself with people I like and
getting things and eating cakeand singing.
Happy birthday to me.
So you said you'd wanna seefriends, I assume.
We then come in later in theday.
(21:24):
I say people I love.
Okay.
Okay.
Just making sure we play around.
And the dog would also get apresent.
Wesley's my birthday mascot.
It's pin the tail on the puppyand see so much spirit.
So yeah.
We'll, um, we'll work on that.
Sure.
Lots of presents.
We get it.
Okay.
So we wanted to do this episode,not just because we love Maggie,
which we do, but because everymilestone is a chance to pause.
(21:47):
To celebrate the good and thebad, to say, look how far we've
come.
And 16 isn't just cakingcandles, it's growth identity.
It's kind of the first year youstart to feel like a real
teenager.
And for any parents or teenslistening, don't wait for
birthdays to tell each otherwhat you're proud of.
Share it now.
Celebrate the person now.
I'm so proud of you, Maggie.
(22:08):
Yay.
Yeah.
We're so proud of who you'rebecoming.
Not because you're perfect,unlike me, but because you're
thoughtful, strong, smart,hilarious, and very much you,
and it's all about you, girl.
On your 16th birthday, what isthat song for SpongeBob?
Oh, okay.
Thank you.
(22:28):
I'm glad to be Me too.
Well happy birthday Maggie.
We all love you very, very much.
Yes.
And for everyone here, follow uson Instagram.
Wish Maggie a happy birthday.
And tell us what's your favoritememory of your 16-year-old or
your own 16th year?
See you next time.
And don't forget to celebratethe people you love loudly and
(22:51):
often, and with yummy chocolatecake and presents.
Hey everyone, it's me, Maggie,and this week I'm taking over
the intro because it's mybirthday and honestly, what
better time to make it all aboutme?
Yep.
It's all about you.
Maggie.
Welcome back to, I Get It frommy mom, where we have the
conversations moms and daughtersshould probably be having, but
with a little more honesty and alittle more sass.
(00:22):
I'm Ava Maggie's older sister,and I've had the spotlight for
18 years, so I'm generouslyletting her borrow with this
episode.
How kind.
And I'm officially turning 16 onApril 30th.
So today's episode is kind of atrip down memory lane, a
celebration and reflection ofthe best topic ever.
Me.
We'll talk about how you cameinto our lives, how you grew up.
(00:45):
What you've taught us and whereyou're headed next.
'cause growing up isn't justabout cake and candles, as much
as we love those, it's aboutfinding your voice, owning your
story, and figuring out who youwanna be.
So whether you're a littlesibling, a big sibling, a proud
parent, or just someone tryingto survive the teenage years,
this one's for you.
Happy birthday, Maggie.
(01:07):
Thanks.
Let's get into it.
Let's start at the beginning.
Maggie, you were planned,wanted, wish for and time just
right.
That's how I'm often described.
(01:27):
Wish for, planned to wish for.
My sister and I were nearlythree years apart, and that's
how we planned for the two ofyou.
But you guys did think Maggiewas gonna be a boy, right?
Yes.
My second pregnancy seemed mucheasier.
No offense, Ava, I gained lessweight.
I carried her very much like abasketball, so it just seemed
different from yours, Ava.
So while we waited until birthto know the gender for both of
(01:49):
you, we did guess that Maggiewas gonna be a boy.
But sure enough, on April 30th,2009, the doctor exclaimed.
It's a girl.
Were you and dad disappointed?
I wasn't a boy disappointed.
No.
I think part of us wanted a sonsince we already had a daughter,
and it would be nice to haveboth.
And you know, daddy's such aguy's guy and loves sports, and
(02:10):
I'm sure would've loved a son toshare that with.
But I also know how close twosisters can be.
So for Ava's sake, I wanted youto be a girl.
Either way.
We were just happy and excitedto have a healthy baby.
And what exactly is the story ofmy name Maggie Rose.
That's a good question.
Not so much a story necessarily.
We frankly, just like somewhatless.
(02:31):
Modern names or even older namesthat were back in style and we
liked ones that ended in vowelsfor girls.
And for some reason with you Iwas hooked on an M.
So Maggie's a bitunconventional, so it, since it
is your given name and you havenot, Margaret, although I know
people always so many questionsto ask you about Margaret, but
we thought it worked for a girland for someone who's older, so
(02:52):
we went with it.
And Rose was for yourgreat-grandmother who passed
only days before you were born,and we do know that our boy name
was going to be Wesley, which isnow our dog's name.
So glad you got to finally useit.
Yeah, well it was your gonna beboy name too.
So Wesley's the dog, does thatmean you two always wanted two
kids?
Yes.
Dad and I each came from afamily of two kids.
(03:13):
We each have a sister, so that'swhat we knew.
Plus I have two hands, or thereare two of us.
We like the idea of never beingoutnumbered.
I think I look like you now.
Did I look like you when I wasborn?
Well, when Ava was born, shelooked just like dad.
No doubt about it.
You, Maggie, were certainly morewhat I expected my child to look
like.
Your face was a little around oryou had dark hair.
(03:36):
I'd say you definitely look morelike my family.
Mostly like Grammy actually.
I honestly don't really rememberanything about her being born.
I was so young, but was I goodwith her?
Was she a good baby?
Um, yeah.
Maggie was a relatively easybaby again compared to Ava,
which we'll focus on for yourbirthday.
VE in a moment, right?
Very flexible as a second childso she could nap anywhere and
(03:59):
got schlepped around withwhatever your schedule was.
Ava, she didn't sleep throughthe night until almost one years
old, but at least when she wokeup to feed, she was happy and
went to bed fairly easily.
And Ava, you were actually agreat big sister.
There was never an issue.
Once the second kid comesaround, you sadly, as a parent,
need the first one to grow up abit and do some things on their
(04:19):
own.
So we made sure that things likeyour snacks or juice boxes were
very accessible for you sinceyou invariably.
Always needed something theminute I sat down to nurse
Maggie.
Uh, and we made the focus ofeverything we do still.
You, we moved you to a big girlroom and got rid of your
pacifiers and had you pottytrained even before Maggie came
along.
We never made you help or takecare of her unless you wanted to
(04:41):
be involved.
But you didn't show any signs ofjealousy, and you were always
good with Maggie and she adoredyou.
At the beginning.
She would just stare at you andthen it turned into giggling at
you, and then eventually it wasjust copying everything you did.
Now I wanna know more about whatI was like as a baby, like what
was my first word?
I'm pretty sure it was.
No, at least that's how Iremember it.
(05:03):
Which I think reflects a lotabout your personality.
Were there like certain thingsit was attached to growing up?
Yes.
You know, you always loved yourpacifier.
Your paci.
That was a process to get rid ofeventually.
Um, and you had your stuffedbear, which you still haven't
sleep with, although now Ibelieve you call him snowy and
not bear.
But to tell you the truth,Maggie, and I hate to say it, I
(05:24):
think this is actually the thirdbear.
Version.
Wait, really?
This was with us since Bear waslike, I think, knew that since
Maggie was like three, we've hadthis bear bear when I was three
versus if I was like six, then Iwould be concerned.
But he's been around a longtime.
When did I crawl and walk ortalk?
All was pretty much on time.
You sat up in about six months.
You crawled out like eightmonths.
(05:45):
You walked by 14 months andbefore that you were a long time
of kind of standing up andholding on and moving around,
but before walking was 14months.
You had words before a year andyou were stringing words
together.
Well, before two years old I wasquite, very advanced.
And what did I call you soadvanced.
Um, let's see.
You called me mama, dad, and Avawas weirdly.
(06:06):
Ah, yeah.
Although eventually you learnhow to say Ava and you went
through a phase where youactually called me EMA when you
were in preschool.
Was I a friendly child?
Was I good with other people?
Um, you were definitely more onthe shy side, not with kids, but
with adults.
You took a bit to warm up topeople, I feel, feel like maybe
you still do a little bit.
Yeah.
Um, and you're a bit more of a.
(06:28):
Whoops.
And then your sister Ava wasalways gung-ho, would try
everything, jump at everything.
You were more cautious and didthings at your own pace, which
is perfectly fine.
Again, I think you're still alittle like that.
Let other people go first.
You could see how they do, thenyou'll do it.
Well, I think I sounded like theperfect baby.
Absolutely.
Perfect.
(06:48):
You weren't just a sweet baby,you were a fun little kid,
curious, observant, cute asanything.
Other kids like to play withyou, and teachers loved you.
They always said your behaviorwas excellent and you were super
helpful.
I definitely had some bestfriends of my own, some in
preschool, and then again inelementary school.
I do remember always likingschool, but I also really
struggled with my handwriting,didn't I?
(07:09):
Yeah.
Dad's still convinced you're notreally a lefty, but just a bad
rightie.
Who's faking it?
I like to argue I'mambidextrous.
I can do most things with twohands.
All right.
Not right though.
Not right.
Can't really do it with either.
Yeah, and it's, I can do sportswith right hands.
We had to get you services foroccupational therapy.
You were very bright kid, butwe're not very good at
translating what was in yourbrain down to something on the
(07:30):
paper.
I mean, frankly, yourhandwriting was.
Illegible, which was crazy, butthis may be a good lesson for
other parents.
We knew Maggie needed help and Ihad to have countless meetings
with the Department of Educationof New York and Maggie's school
to fight for her to get thoseservices.
They were convinced that sinceshe was fairly bright and wasn't
critical to address her OTneeds.
(07:52):
But you know, we fiercely foughtand argued and advocated for you
for years.
I mean, we were in meeting aftermeeting about this.
So my advice to parents is ifyou sense your child needs
something or if a test doesn'tshow exactly what you want,
don't relax about it.
You know, don't hesitate to haveyour child tested for something
or fight for the services theyneed.
Ignore any stigma around it.
Best to address it when they'reyoung.
(08:15):
I don't ever remember reallygetting tested for it, but I
definitely remember doing OTwhen I needed it and getting
pulled outta class and havingall my fun fidget twice to
increase my hand strength.
Oh, it was so much fun.
Fidget.
I was always told my handcouldn't keep up with my brain,
so clearly I was very ahead.
Moving on.
I mean, me and Ava were alwayspretty close, right?
Yeah.
I mean, I, when I think aboutour childhood together, I just
(08:37):
remember us being best friends.
We were in the same school.
I remember getting rewarded atschool was that I get got to go
and see you.
I got to go to your danceclasses.
I remember we had play datestogether.
We had friends who were siblingstoo.
Yeah, that's when I think aboutmy childhood, I just remember
the two of us.
Absolutely.
I mean, so much of your liveswere obviously Yeah, just
(09:00):
together.
And it's funny'cause I look backand think of you as such an easy
kid, Maggie, you generally wentwith the flow, but I also think
as a second child we maybe justassumed you were cool with
everything going on around you.
Dad coached your softball and hecoached Davis' softball.
We signed you up for balletsince Ava had done it.
We sent you to sleep weightcamp.
Since Ava was there, I'm notsaying these were the wrong
(09:22):
decisions for you, but we kindof just maybe followed a
parenting formula.
Did we get it wrong?
I mean, I don't ever rememberbeing forced to do anything or
into different activities.
There were definitely things Iliked that Ava didn't I?
My love for stuffed animalsalways, but.
I dunno.
I feel like the sports I used toplay, I never liked TV shows or
(09:43):
movies as much as Ava didgrowing up.
I prefer a hands-on thing, agame, or an activity.
I did softball for a very longtime until I just determined
that it wasn't my sport.
I definitely did not like soccerwhen you signed me up for it.
But that was more me than Avaand I definitely did love camp.
I hated soccer.
I don't know.
I don't know if I ever didsoccer, but I hated it.
I have never liked soccer.
(10:04):
Um, but did you ever feel likepeople thought of you as Ava's
younger sister rather than justMaggie?
I don't think so.
Certainly not outside the house.
There were times in elementaryschool when all the kids in your
grade would know me at a asAva's little sister and at camp
sometimes too.
But I never felt like I was inyour shadow.
I always spoke up when I wantedto, said what I needed to, said
(10:26):
what's on my mind, and if Ididn't think something, I didn't
say it.
I just felt like I was doing myown thing and I was Ava's
younger sister, but I never feltlike I was being overshadowed by
her.
Truth of the matter, is thatsomething like camp, no one
probably remembers me, buteveryone remembers you.
You were there for much longerthan I did, so if anything, I'm
Maggie's sister now.
There you go.
And let's talk about the thingsyou did, voice that you wanted,
(10:46):
mags, do you remember all yourbirthday themes through the
years?
I definitely do all the ones athip ball park.
In the little party room, thebuild to bear theme, the frozen
theme, the little Olaf cardboardcutout I had.
The shirt I can picture theposters, the SpongeBob theme,
the unicorn theme, the candyland theme, all the activities
you would make like pin the hornon the unicorn and candy trivia,
(11:06):
and all your incredible artskills coming out.
What would be your theme thisyear if you had a party?
Definitely like money or clothesor makeup, something.
I like Starbucks, definitely.
And this is why you no longerhave birthday parties, max.
Then came middle school and withit covid.
(11:30):
Maggie, I think it's safe to saythat was the toughest time in
your life so far.
Definitely Covid hit as I wasjust finishing fifth grade,
which means I was starting at abrand new school from behind a
screen.
I didn't get to say bye to allmy friends I had when I was
younger and was now thrust intomiddle school where I didn't
know anyone.
I wasn't in a classroom, justsitting on my bed all day stuck
on a computer.
It was awful.
(11:50):
Yeah, it definitely was.
You went from being this supersocial connected kid to isolated
and quiet.
Yeah.
It was hard to watch.
You struggled socially, but.
Also, it seemed emotionally, it,it, it changed your rhythm.
I know it changed how you sawyourself for a while.
Yeah.
I definitely didn't know how tolike, fit in anymore.
I'm someone who needs to seepeople to be social.
(12:12):
Like not being able to do thatreally like disconnected me from
people and even my own voice.
I mean, maybe it was the normalpart of Tweenage time, but it
was like being stuck with all ofyou.
Maybe it was how disconnected Ifelt to the real world, but I
definitely struggled.
Yeah.
It was hard as a parent to watchyou change and not be yourself.
Do you think we should havehandled it better or addressed
(12:32):
it differently or not to make itabout us?
So said another way.
Is there advice you'd giveanother 11 or 12-year-old
struggling with loneliness andto their parents?
Um, I don't think you guys didanything wrong.
I think there probably couldhave been signs you could have
read a little further into tosee if I was doing okay, but I
think.
(12:52):
Growing up is hard, especiallyover covid.
It's different when you get togo to school every day.
When you're struggling withloneliness, you should just like
find your people.
I know that's easier said thandone, but like finding someone
you're friends with, findingsomeone you connect to.
Join every club, join everyevent, go to anything, see the
people that are there and justtry and talk to someone.
And so their parent, I thinkfocus on the signs if they're
(13:15):
really talkative and reallysocial.
And then they go through aperiod where they really can't
do that, like covid or they'rejust acting very differently.
Maybe check in and maybe it is adeeper issue.
Was there something that youfeel like helped you pull out of
it, or was it kind of just whenyou returned back to school?
I think returning to schoolreally helped.
I knew people who went to myschool and during Covid we would
(13:36):
have some days where we would goin person and some days not.
So I met people.
And by eighth grade, I feel likemy whole school was very close
with each other, or my wholegrade was, and I talked to
people every day and I sawpeople every day and made
friends and did stuff outside ofschool, which definitely helps
me feel more normal again.
So I think for you it's probablya combination of, it's a little
(13:57):
transition time anyway, fromlike elementary to middle.
It was also covid and then 11,12, 13 are years where kids are
finding themselves anyway,especially girls.
Right.
Definitely.
Yeah.
But that was good advice.
Okay, so now here you are.
16.
16 candles, confident.
You're funny, you're strong,you're chatty, you're loving a
(14:20):
completely original, fullyformed Maggie.
You chose a different highschool than Ava.
Have joined clubs and afterschool activities.
Have good friends.
Yeah, I definitely feel like inthe year that I went away, you
definitely changed a lot too.
There's all these things thatyou never used to like, that you
like now and you didn't neverwanted to do or try new foods
and then I'm gone and thensuddenly you're all open to
(14:42):
these new things.
Yeah, I feel like I'm able tosay I find finally truly my own
person and picking my own path.
It's nice to be the only childfor a bit.
I have amazing friends.
I'm doing well in school, and Ifigure out what I care about on
my terms.
You're so independent now, butyou still have a strong
connection to your family, whichwe love.
Of course.
And I appreciate the daily hugsI get because, no, I need them,
(15:03):
especially without if I needdouble, but I also know there's
plenty of times when you're notin the mood for all of us or too
much going on around you.
You're someone who.
We know it still needs yourspace and needs a load time, and
you still share things whenyou're ready and when you're in
the mood.
Yeah, I like to spend my timealone, sometimes lying in bed,
just relaxing and entertainingmyself with something I have in
(15:24):
my room, and don't always wantto be around people or getting
questioned or just having totalk about myself constantly.
So you're finishing yoursophomore year in high school
right now.
Is there something you'velearned these last two years of
school that you'd like toapproach how you change things
in maybe the next two years ofschool?
I think I've gotten better atstudying this year, like knowing
(15:45):
how to prepare for a test, doingwork on time.
During Covid.
Obviously all of that was veryhard, so now I kind of had to
relearn how to do it.
And I growing up was neverreally a kid who had to study.
I kind of always knew what wasgoing on, but after Covid I
definitely lost that train alittle.
So now it's kind of just gettingback into, this is now like
really school covid doesn'treally matter anymore.
(16:06):
So now it really is just schooland doing everything and doing
every test and seeing everybodyevery day and doing all my work.
And how about as you think aboutnow you're in the important
years of 11th to 12th grade.
Are there other things you'refocused on other than only
grades?
I think definitely coming inwith junior year for college,
I'm thinking about things I'mdoing outside of school, trying
(16:27):
to find jobs to do, trying tofind specific things that
interest me that I can focus onor do clubs for starter club,
join a team just to help prepareme for that.
Besides just keeping my gradesup, but also just finding who I
am and finding what I can dowith that Makes sense.
(16:47):
So, Maggie, if you don't mind,we'd love to dive into what
makes you tick a bit more andhow you think about the future.
So we're gonna ask you somequestions to put you on the
spot, which you'll just have tosuck up and go along with, even
if it's your birthday.
That sounds great.
Okay.
So what's your favorite subjectin school now and what do you
think you wanna study in collegeone day?
Um, I think my favorite subject.
(17:10):
It's probably like science oreven like global history.
I think I'm interested in likelearning things.
I like knowing things.
Definitely not, math is not mystrong suit.
I like learning history and likeknowing about it, like science
when I'm taking chemistry andyou like learn something.
I don't like math where it allbuilds on each other and I have
to know it all or remembereverything.
I don't like ELA.
I am not the best writer and Idon't love reading.
(17:33):
I don't really know what I wannastudy in college.
I've looked at like a politicalpolicy thing, a like a political
science thing, something thatkind of, I'm a very good
debater.
I love debating.
My favorite class is probablyethics.
To be fair, I love a Socraticseminar where I have to debate
my idea.
So I wanna do something where Ican fight for what I believe in,
(17:55):
talk for myself, talk with whatI think, talk with my ideas.
So you just wanna argue with usall the time.
Definitely.
I'll be honest.
Any idea on the type of collegeyou see yourself going to?
Um, I definitely want a schoolwith sports.
I like a spirit after going tocamp for so many years.
I need something I can cheer forand be spirited in.
I don't want a city aftergrowing up in a city, but I'd
(18:17):
like to be near a city'cause I'msomeone who gets bored very
easily and I would like to havesomething exciting to go out and
do.
Even on just weekends if it'slike a 40, 45 minute drive away.
But I definitely want somethinga little more rural and a little
campusy definitely, butdefinitely big inspira and maybe
near a city or just having agood town to do stuff in.
(18:40):
Makes sense.
So do you see yourself thenafter college, living in a city
or maybe more suburbs?
I think I definitely wanna raisea family in the city especially
after growing up as a teenagerin the city.
I know what it's like to be ableto get myself around and do my
own thing.
I mean, I trust myself.
Hopefully I'll be able to trustmy kids.
But I can't imagine having toone, drive everywhere and then
(19:00):
also drive my kids everywhere ifthey wanna go.
I really like the freedom andthe like diversity that being in
a city has taught us.
And I wanna grow up.
I wanna raise a family in thatsame setting.
I think the most importantquestion is, are you gonna have
a dog?
Definitely.
What about kids?
Do you know how many you want?
Got any names in the Notes app?
What are we thinking there?
(19:21):
I think similar to Mommy andDad.
Yeah, I grew up with onesibling.
I think I would like my kids tohave one sibling.
I also don't wanna beoutnumbered with kids.
I think four is a very goodnumber for.
Sitting in a car, sitting at arestaurant.
Four is just such like a goodeven number.
And I definitely like have nameswritten down, but I don't think
I've really thought through it.
Gotta keep, I'm really bad atlike, if I know someone with
(19:42):
that name, I can't name my kidthat.
'cause then I just constantlythink of them.
You gotta keep'em a secret.
Don't share.
I really need to be likedifferent.
Don't steal'em.
One people steal, or two,they'll have opinions and nobody
wants opinions.
That's true.
Like, you name me Ava.
And then suddenly everyone'snamed Eva.
Everyone.
Ava.
I did not know that.
Sorry.
Maggie's a little.
Maggie's has a nice nickname.
I like my name.
Yeah.
(20:02):
Although she recently metanother Maggie Klein.
That's true.
If you think about the future,let's say like the next five
years or so, what would you sayyou're most worried about and
what are you most excited for?
I think obviously what I'm mostworried about is getting into
college and then obviously whatI'm most excited about is going
into college.
I think it's definitely astressful experience to have to
(20:23):
wait around and see what you gotinto and then like pack forward
and decide if where you wanna gofor the next four years of your
life.
But it's definitely somethingI'm excited for.
I don't really know what elseHAP is happening in the next
five years of my life besidescollege, what I have to look
forward to in graduating highschool.
But it's kind of a mix ofemotions for both things.
Well, obviously I think weshould circle back to the most
(20:44):
important thing, your birthday.
We didn't overly plan anythingthis year.
Your birthday's also in themiddle of the week, but let's
say it's a weekend.
What is your perfect birthday?
I think it would be like hangingout with friends in the morning.
I'm a really good, I like gifts.
I like opening things that are,for me, I'm really bad at
(21:04):
reacting to gifts.
Yeah.
But I like getting things thatare for me, even though I am
really excited, I'll just belike.
Thanks, but.
I like getting gifts.
I think it would be surroundingmyself with people I like and
getting things and eating cakeand singing.
Happy birthday to me.
So you said you'd wanna seefriends, I assume.
We then come in later in theday.
(21:24):
I say people I love.
Okay.
Okay.
Just making sure we play around.
And the dog would also get apresent.
Wesley's my birthday mascot.
It's pin the tail on the puppyand see so much spirit.
So yeah.
We'll, um, we'll work on that.
Sure.
Lots of presents.
We get it.
Okay.
So we wanted to do this episode,not just because we love Maggie,
which we do, but because everymilestone is a chance to pause.
(21:47):
To celebrate the good and thebad, to say, look how far we've
come.
And 16 isn't just cakingcandles, it's growth identity.
It's kind of the first year youstart to feel like a real
teenager.
And for any parents or teenslistening, don't wait for
birthdays to tell each otherwhat you're proud of.
Share it now.
Celebrate the person now.
I'm so proud of you, Maggie.
(22:08):
Yay.
Yeah.
We're so proud of who you'rebecoming.
Not because you're perfect,unlike me, but because you're
thoughtful, strong, smart,hilarious, and very much you,
and it's all about you, girl.
On your 16th birthday, what isthat song for SpongeBob?
Oh, okay.
Thank you.
(22:28):
I'm glad to be Me too.
Well happy birthday Maggie.
We all love you very, very much.
Yes.
And for everyone here, follow uson Instagram.
Wish Maggie a happy birthday.
And tell us what's your favoritememory of your 16-year-old or
your own 16th year?
See you next time.
And don't forget to celebratethe people you love loudly and
(22:51):
often, and with yummy chocolatecake and presents.
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