April 21, 2025 • 39 mins
What happens when two people with the same rare genetic disorder fall in love? Chad and Allison's love story defies the challenges of Osteogenesis Imperfecta (OI), a condition that causes brittle bones.
Chad, born 20" long, overcame a grim doctor's prognosis, defying expectations with humor and determination. Growing up in Mississippi, he excelled in school and built a successful career as a government contractor.
Allison's OI journey included numerous hospital stays and challenges, but she remained independent and strong. When she met Chad through an OI support group, their connection was instant, and at their first meeting, Chad knew he had found the one he would marry.
Their relationship is built on shared experiences and mutual understanding, and together, they've created a life filled with love, laughter, and resilience. Chad's recent retirement and the upcoming release of his documentary, 96 Pounds of Dynamite, mark a new chapter in their journey.
Their story proves that true strength comes not from physical abilities but from the courage to live fully despite challenges. As Chad says, “There’s no magic way to get through life and OI... just faith, prayer, and laughter.”
Tune in to learn how two people with fragile bones built an unbreakable bond, and how their journey teaches resilience, love, and joy in unexpected places.
To watch the trailer: 96lbs of Dynamite: https://dynamite-film.com/
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Purchase my book or Audiobook: Why I Survived: How Sharing My Story Helped Me Heal from Dating Abuse, Armed Robbery, Abduction, and Other Forms of Trauma by Jennifer Lee
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Everyone has a story.
They just don't always have aplace to share it.
Welcome to I Need Blue, thepodcast about to take you on an
(00:22):
extraordinary journey whereprofound narratives come to life
, one captivating episode at atime.
I'm your host, jennifer Lee,and I founded this podcast
because I know there is healingand sharing.
Each story you will hear sharedon this podcast is a testament
to our collective strength,innate ability to transform in
(00:45):
the incredible power of healing.
Please remember you are neveralone.
Please visit and share mywebsite with those seeking
connection and inspirationwwwineedbluenet.
Thank you, char Good, forcomposing and performing the
introduction medley for I NeedBlue.
(01:07):
You can find information aboutChar on her website,
wwwchargoodcom.
Before starting today's episode,I must provide a trigger
warning.
I Need Blue features graphicthemes, including, but not
limited to, violence, abuse andmurder, and may not be suitable
for all listeners.
(01:28):
Please take care of yourselfand don't hesitate to ask for
help if you need it.
Now let's get started withtoday's story.
Standing at two feet eightinches, chad is a force to
reckon with, not just at thepool table, where he once
dominated as a seasoned shark,but in life itself.
(01:50):
Outspoken and outgoing, chad'senergy is magnetic and when
asked about his disability, heshrugs with a grin.
It doesn't define me.
Born with osteogenesisimperfecta OI a rare genetic
disorder that causes brittlebones, chad's journey began with
(02:12):
a grim prognosis.
When his mother brought himhome from the hospital, the
doctor coldly advised give him apillow, he'll live as long as
he does.
But Chad had other plans.
He carved out a whole vibrantlife, recently retiring from a
successful career as agovernment contractor, a
(02:35):
testament to his grit anddefiance of expectations.
Over two decades ago, fatedialed in when Chad met Allison
after six months of long,heartfelt phone conversations.
When Chad saw her, he knew I'mgoing to marry her.
And he did.
(02:57):
Allison, like Chad, was bornwith OI.
Her childhood was marked withnumerous hospital stays, four
weeks at a time in traction.
They would set her femur boneand she would lay healing.
Their journeys were unique, butwhen asked to describe their
bond, they summed it upperfectly we took different
(03:19):
roads to the same destination.
Together, chad and Allison areliving proof that resilience
isn't just about surviving.
It's about thriving love andfinding joy in every unexpected
term.
I'm honored to introduce twoincredible people whose stories
(03:41):
redefine resilience and love.
Whose stories redefineresilience and love Chad and
Allison.
Thank you for being my guesttoday on the I Need Blue podcast
.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Thank you, Jen, for having us.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
Yes, thank you, you're very welcome.
Okay, chad, let's talk a littlebit about what your childhood
was like going into adulthood,because I know it looked a
little bit different thanAllison's.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Yeah, I was born in a small town called Columbia,
mississippi, a population ofabout 7,000 people.
I was diagnosed, though, withOI when my mom was about seven
months pregnant with me.
Due to an ultrasound, my longbones were curved and it just so
happens the small town doctorhappened to know what OI was and
(04:31):
he was able to diagnose mebefore I was born.
She did have me be a C-sectionand I am clinically diagnosed
with type 3 OI.
The doctor did send me home ina pillow and said, basically he
lives as long as he lives, whichwas kind of scary, but my mom
was a strong person and reallydetermined to let me have the
(04:55):
best life I could have.
I did have to have herniasurgery when I was six weeks old
, and that's the only surgeryI've had in my life, which is
kind of rare for a person withOI.
And they say, well, the numberof people affected by OI in the
US it's really unknown.
They have to guesstimate itbetween 20,000 and 50,000 people
(05:16):
, so it is pretty rare.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
Yeah, and OI can physically appear differently
depending upon the individual.
What were your physicalcharacteristics then, when you
were born?
Speaker 2 (05:31):
I was a pretty small baby.
I was only 5 pounds 12 ounces.
I remember my mother talkingabout trying to find clothes for
me and diapers.
I was so tiny.
It was really difficult Growingup.
I was extremely small.
At six years old I only weighed20 pounds.
You know, my stature is still.
Even now I'm a little heavier.
(05:54):
I'm still really short, at onlytwo foot eight.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Yes, you know, you have a bit of a sense of humor,
which I absolutely appreciate,and you did share a story with
me regarding being so small.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
I was in a grocery cart, or what we call a buggy,
and shopping at Gibson's, whichis kind of like a general
department store, and this olderlady came up to me just
basically said oh, what a nicebaby.
I was probably four or fiveyears old, I am not a baby.
And the lady almost had a heartattack right there, you know,
(06:35):
because I was very sure aboutmyself.
She didn't expect me to talklike that.
So that sort of small town lifetoo in Mississippi you get used
to it a little bit.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Yes, and let's talk about mobility.
What did that look like for you?
Speaker 2 (06:54):
Well, I did get around with a stroller till I
was about six, and thenEasterseals donated me a what I
call puke yellow manualwheelchair, and then, when I was
nine years old, I got my firstpower wheelchair, which allowed
me to get around by myself atschool.
(07:14):
There were some issues withthat, though, because a teacher
and I did a fundraising to getthe wheelchair, and then, when I
got the wheelchair, the schooltried to claim it.
They said it was the school'swheelchair and not my wheelchair
, but yet all the money wentthrough me, all the checks were
made out to me.
(07:34):
I even had my own bank accountwith my name at nine years old,
and they still tried to claimthe wheelchair.
We ended up having to get anadvocate to help clear that up,
and eventually this was in thirdgrade.
Beginning of third grade theyallowed me to use my chair and
take it back and forth.
(07:55):
I rode the short bus, you know,as I jokingly called it, but
actually a big bus that wouldhold about six wheelchairs, and
that power wheelchair was a realbig step for independence, and
my neighbor and I would evenplay woofer ball out in the
street.
I had a lot of fun doing that.
(08:15):
I was just like a regular kid,you know, we would yell car,
everybody would have to go offto the side of the road.
I had a pretty good childhoodin that regard and then, about
11 years old, I started playingbumper pool because they had a
program that would allow thekids to go for a half day and
(08:37):
hang out with the teenagers.
They had hired to kind ofoversee us to play different
games, and it was at theWaterworks building for the city
and they had a foosball tableand, just so happens, they had a
bumper pool table and I reallytook to the game.
I remember having to go get mydad out of the pool hall when I
was much younger, so I knew Ihad some pool blood in me, so to
(09:01):
speak, and I really took to thegame with the angles and the
geometry and the physics,because that's how my brain
worked anyway.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
Great, you started at age 11, then playing pool what
fun.
Let's talk a little bit aboutyour school years, then, and
what that looked like.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
Starting with school when I was about four years old,
I had a homebound teacher thatwould come out two or three days
a week.
After doing this for a coupleof years, she encouraged my mom
to enroll me in Redwood School.
So at age six I did that and Iwas reading at a second grade
level and doing math at a thirdgrade level at age six, which
(09:39):
was pretty good.
But they insisted on putting mein a mentally handicapped class
because they really didn'tdifferentiate between physically
handicapped and mentallyhandicapped.
After being in this class fortwo years my mom kind of got the
idea from that teacher this kidshould probably be in regular
(10:01):
school because of his educationlevel and so I should have
started in third grade.
But they ended up holding meback and they started me in
second grade, ended upgraduating third in my class of
127 students with a 3.87 GPA.
So I had some brains in theresomewhere.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
You had a lot of brains in there.
So then, now after high school,we go into college to further
your education and your career.
Would you like to share alittle bit of that journey with
us?
Speaker 2 (10:36):
Sure, I started college classes actually the
week after I graduated highschool.
I took two classes that summervia the local junior college.
I took speech and compositionand then I went on to three and
a half hours away to MississippiState, to attend college.
It was totally on my own, noparents involved or anything
(10:58):
like that, but it was toughbecause the very first semester
I fell out of my wheelchair andbroke my left femur and that was
the first time I'd everexperienced a break on my own.
It was interesting.
I grew up a little bit learninghow to deal with that myself.
It ended up taking me six yearsto get my degree in computer
(11:19):
science because of all thedistraction I loved to play pool
and I loved to drink beer.
I made some bad choices, Iadmit.
I even tell my kids, you know,I'm not very hard on them about
it because you know I did somestupid things myself.
You know, in that regard I wasjust doing my best to try and be
a normal person, like ateenager that rebels.
(11:41):
Well, I kind of rebelled later,as I call it, and unfortunately
my GPA suffered in college andit did take me six years to get
the degree you know which.
It took four, but I mean, therewas a lot of just learning to be
independent, learning to getthrough life without my parents,
because at the time my parentshad been through a divorce when
(12:03):
I was in high school.
Because at the time my parentshad been through a divorce when
I was in high school, and so itwas me feeling my oats, so to
speak.
You know, talking about mycareer, you know, once I
graduated college I went betweenpart-time jobs, really not able
to make a go of it.
So I reached out to a friendfrom college and his stepdad
(12:30):
actually got me a job in Renodown here in Florida, which is
13 hours away, and they likedwhat they heard from me.
They flew me down and then, afew weeks later, I'm here
working in Florida now.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
And recently retired.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Congratulations, thank you, thank you.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Of course, I have a question.
In your quest for normalcy,what did you find to be the
biggest challenges for you?
Speaker 2 (12:54):
That's a great question.
I think personally it wasdating and having a girlfriend
and having those type ofrelationships.
I found it very difficult.
I think normal women tend topity me more than want to date
(13:18):
me, or they don't see thepositives as much as the
negatives.
And all my life growing upeverybody always told me oh, you
should find you a nice girl ina wheelchair.
And I was just like no, I don'twant to do that, that's no, no,
that's too much responsibility,that would be doubly hard.
(13:39):
And of course then I met mywife.
That all went out the windowquick.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yes, and when you speak of Allison, there is such
love in your heart and in yourwords that you choose, and I am
so excited to include Allison inour conversation today.
So, allison, let's switch overto you and your childhood.
Can you share what that lookedlike with us?
Speaker 3 (14:07):
Well, I started out, was born in New York, my dad was
an electrical engineer, so welived in Long Island and then my
dad got transferred when I wasfour and a half almost five to
California.
California had different ideasof what to do.
My breaks were mostly tibiasback then and so that was just
(14:29):
get patched up at the doctor, acast and home, and I actually
scooted out of a cast once.
I was super skinny and I backedout of a cast, left it behind,
didn't even look back, and mymom found the cast and was
looking around for me.
I had just casts with femurfractures in New York, but in
California the traction was thebig thing and braces the old
(14:51):
leather braces.
So I got fitted for those atfive and I hated them.
I had to talk to my mom's friend, who was a counselor, for every
day for a week, just trying towork out my feelings about these
heavy, sweaty things I wassupposed to wear.
One time I went in my bedroom,I closed the door, I went over
(15:13):
to my bed, I took them off and Istood up just to prove to
myself I still could.
I lied about how I broke in apool once I was doing what the
other kids were doing and it wasstupid.
And I was trying to sit on oneof those paddle boards that
don't want to go under the waterlike the other kids were doing
and of course, I broke a femurin the public pool.
(15:35):
So that was bad.
My two most memorable breaksand most disfiguring when I was
five, my dad and I think he haddone this in New York actually
he was more comfortable using athree wheel bike because he also
had OI and he put a car seat onthe back of it for me.
And then, when my legs gotlonger and he put a board for my
(16:00):
legs to sit on, without sideson it, because who would have
thought I'd need that?
We were waiting for my friend,genevieve Hi, genevieve to come
over for a play date.
I'm excited and we're in thegarage and my mom's trying to
keep me occupied and I beggedher please take me around the
block on the back of the bike.
So she did and she had to pullover to the side of the road to
(16:22):
let a car go by, and it was justenough of a dip to the side
that my right leg swung over andgot caught in the spokes when
she took off again and itsnapped my tibia.
It ended up with an S-shapedcurve and it was a mess.
So I later got that fixed,unfortunately, and that's a
(16:42):
whole nother story, but that wasthe first memorable one.
And then, a couple of yearslater, we were visiting my Aunt,
jan, and my cousins Kim andKelly.
After the visit, my dad drove upto get us and take us back to
California and we were stayingthe night in Colorado Springs.
(17:03):
I had already taken off thoseawful braces I hated, and so I
just, you know, flipped over onmy stomach and scooted off the
bed to go to the bathroom, scootin and go to the bathroom, and
the blankets were a littleslippery and I hit the floor too
hard.
When my knee hit the floor Ibroke my femur.
My dad and the motel owner ormanager, whatever he was, they
(17:27):
together found a board to put meon and this man loaned my dad
his station wagon to drive me tothe hospital and I got a cast
and my dad rigged up the car.
He took the front passengerseat out, put it in the big
(17:48):
trunk Thank God it was a bigtrunk right and then he put the
suitcases and that hoard in thepassenger seat, connecting it to
the back seat.
You know, and that's how I rodeback to California from Colorado
Springs and that's how I got myreally curved left femur, which
that is my strongest point inmy legs was this untouched
(18:08):
curved femur.
So some of the parents nowthink that if it's curved it's
going to break.
You have to fix it.
But my lowers were pretty muchruined by corrective surgery
when I was 17.
So I'm one of the ones thatproves that the surgeries are
not great.
The only other surgery I hadwas one time that the traction
(18:32):
didn't set my leg.
It set wrong.
The doctor put me under tobreak it and I still remember
what my dad stuck around andwatched with me to keep me calm
American Graffiti was on TV.
So I still get that little bitof anxiety because needles that
(18:53):
was the part that I hated themost being a kid in the hospital
was the needle you know Iwanted to ask.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Coming from from somebody who, knock on wood, has
never broken a bone with asoften as you talk about you know
you've had these breaks thefemur, the tibia.
That to me sounds likeexcruciating pain.
Speaker 3 (19:12):
It is, it's not, it's not good.
Femurs, especially because Ihad six of them between 10 and
12.
And femurs, especially becauseI had six of them between 10 and
12.
Because, okay, so I went fromthe little skinny kid that was
back up immediately on my feet.
They would stick the little nubthing on the bottom of your
cast and I'd be on it within acouple of days, walking and
(19:32):
scooting out of it and all that.
And then when we moved toCalifornia, by fourth grade I
had been begging to get to go topublic school.
So, kindergarten, I went topublic school until I broke and
then ended up home with the hometeacher.
First grade.
My parents found thishandicapped school so they stuck
(19:53):
me in there.
First grade was great becausethere was both mentally and just
physically disabled kids and Ihad a lot of friends and it was
great.
Second grade started all thosekids that didn't need to be in
there were matriculated intoregular school and it was just
me and this girl who was almostnever there.
And my parents saw how bored Iwas after two weeks and they
pulled me out and they put me ina handicap school.
(20:16):
I was there for second and thirdgrade and my dad thought the
smaller class sizes would besafer, since I was still walking
.
I made a deal with him, which Ikind of regret.
But for fourth grade I said ifI use grandma's wheelchair, will
you let me go to public school?
And they agreed.
That's when the series of femurbreaks started, because I
(20:38):
strength the braces, hadweakened my muscles so I didn't
have the muscle protecting thebone.
My dad did all kinds of tricksafter the surgery.
When I was 17 he built aplatform that he could hand
crank up to slowly make theslant steeper.
That was uncomfortable, but andthen he started just whacking
(21:00):
the end of the cast with a boardto try to help stimulate blood
flow to the you know, thefracture site.
He was creative, but he was anengineer.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
Yeah, I was going to say that that's awesome, and he
was able to use his creativemind and look at a situation and
try to come up with ways tomake life easier for you, you
know.
Speaking of parents, what doyou think it was like for them
to have to watch their child inso much pain?
What do you think it was likefor them?
Speaker 3 (21:29):
Well, my dad and my aunt both had about as many
breaks as I did, but they wereupright the whole time so they
didn't use the wheelchair.
And then my grandmother alsohad OI.
She had less breaks, I think,but she had the different length
legs like me, she had a backbrace.
I don't know if it's easier ifyou've had OI yourself or these
(21:52):
poor parents that just find outabout it because their kid has
the mutation, like Chad's momwent through.
I don't know.
A lot of them feel guilt and mydad, I think, felt a lot of
guilt because he believeddoctors that actually said well,
(22:14):
because you have it pretty mildand your wife doesn't have it,
it'll be somewhere in between.
And that's not how it works.
You have a 50% chance ofpassing it if one parent has it
and if two parents have it, it'sfour 25% chances, either your
type, your husband's type, bothor none none.
Speaker 2 (22:44):
Neither of my parents had a life and so, growing up,
my mother it's funny because mymother smoked.
She's passed away now.
But when Allison and I werefirst dating, allison fell out
of her wheelchair in East LA.
It was really nobody's fault.
She got a new chair.
It had two smaller tires in thefront and she ended up flipping
forwards and landing on herright femur and breaking it.
(23:08):
And this is in East LA, rightoutside the train station.
It was a harrowing day.
It was just a rough day Becausehere I am as her fiance looking
at her going.
There's nothing I can do to fixher.
I'm helpless at this point.
Anyway, at the end of that day,finally, when I was able to
(23:31):
take a breath, I picked up thephone and I called my mother and
I told my mother I now know whyyou smoke, because the stress
of that day alone was justphenomenal.
And if I could tell a reallyquick story, it's really a
testament to Allison's Allisonand her resiliency.
(23:51):
Right after we got married, justa few weeks, our son broke his
right leg.
Her daughter was watching himin the hospital.
Allison was like we need toride the leg and I was more
cautioned, more of the doctor.
I said well, let's see what thedoctor says.
The doctor didn't want to rideit.
Thankfully, I agree with thatdecision.
(24:12):
And so later on, you know,three-year-old Josh just is
still.
He's dragging this body castaround, just wanting to go and
do.
Sure enough, literally the dayafter he got out of the cast we
catch him.
He's standing up on the legagain.
You know, he is not going toslow down.
(24:33):
It was like no, he shouldn't berunning for weeks, or blah,
blah, blah.
And I looked at her and shelooked at me.
Speaker 3 (24:46):
I go.
You think we're going to slowthis three-year-old down?
Yeah right.
Speaker 1 (24:48):
That was exactly me.
I was on it as quickly as I wasallowed to.
Yeah, let's move on to y'all'slove story.
Speaker 2 (24:52):
I love that Sure January of 2002, january of 2002
, we had started talking to eachother at the urgency of two
friends.
We had sort of knew of eachother in probably 95, 96
(25:12):
timeframe because we were bothmembers of the same mailing list
out of Australia that dealswith our disability.
Our two friends both said, hey,you two should kind of talk to
each other, and yada, yada, yada.
And so we did.
We emailed each other and weprobably talked on internet,
instant messenger, and then westarted talking on the phone.
You know, back and forth.
It just so happens in 2002,there was a conference on our
(25:37):
disability in Orlando.
We both kind of agreed nothingelse.
We'll be good friends and nopressure.
Let's not, do you know anything?
Serious pressure to gettogether or anything like that.
It just so happens I had awheelchair and her daughter was
coming flying in with her, and Itold her I says, oh, we'll just
(25:58):
pick you up from the airport.
So my friend Donna and I showedup at the airport and we went
to see her.
I do what she looked like andeverything.
We picked her up and I rememberif she was wheeling away from
me, I looked at her and Ithought to myself I said that's
the one I'm gonna marry.
And then I told myself, chad,do not think that, do not set
(26:18):
yourself up for failure.
You know how you get, you knowhow you overthink things.
And so I was like, okay, I gotto calm down, okay, but as fate
would have it, we were just allover each other that weekend.
It was like there wasconferences, eight or nine
conferences a day, you know.
For three days I think we mayhave went to two, maybe three.
(26:41):
We would be sneaking offsomewhere.
Heck, we even went back out tomy van in the parking lot to
make out.
You know, I mean, we were justlike young teenagers here, we
were in our early 30s doing thisand it was crazy, you know, it
was just crazy.
I really fell for her, you know,I really loved her and I ended
up, because of who I worked for,I was able to get cheap flights
(27:04):
going back and forth betweenOrlando and LA.
I was getting $175 round-tripflights almost monthly to go out
to see her, and so I would goout there, and her dad was
really awesome about helping meset up to get in and out of my
wheelchair and set up the showerthere, and I even surprised her
(27:26):
.
I showed up on Thanksgiving.
She didn't even know I wascoming, you know, and that was
just so awesome.
The previous month, in October,I proposed to her to marry her
and I bought her daughter a ringas well.
I gave her a birthstone ring aswell.
I remember it was so cold, itwas drizzling rain on a baseball
(27:52):
field on the first base side,in the dugout of all things
Probably the most unromanticthing you could do, but I really
wanted to marry her.
We had decided to get marriedthe next year and it just made
sense in our life.
Okay, let's make a go of it.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
We started talking and it was just like we'd known
each other forever, the momentthat I really realized this is
the one for me, this one, thisis it.
I was on a date with somebodyelse.
He had to leave for anappointment and as I'm scooting
out of this little bench thingyou know the tables with the
(28:27):
benches I felt what felt like abreak in my femur, my right
femur, and I stopped, I frozeand I said you know, you go
ahead and go to your appointment, I'm just going to sit here for
a minute.
And I got him to leave and thenI tried to get ahold of my dad.
I had to wait a couple hours, soI immediately called Chad and I
(28:48):
knew it was work day.
He was at work.
He stayed on the phone with me,on speaker, where all his
buddies could hear, for twohours, just trying to keep me
sane because I was starting tofreak out.
Because, you know, at first youdon't feel much because the
adrenaline kicks in and if youdon't get things taken care of
(29:08):
while you're still in that state, it's just a little nutty.
And he stayed right there withme and I thought, oh my gosh,
this is the one If you're notwith somebody who understands.
You can't connect on the samelevel.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
I mean it becomes more than breaking wind in front
of each other.
You really have, I guess, lessinhibitions.
You know you don't.
If you've got somebody that's afellow disabled, especially
with the same disability.
You know about the pain and howto overcome it, how to pray
through it, how to cope with it.
(29:42):
And we moved into my tiny home.
It was a thousand square foothome and it was only two
bedrooms and I made the backporch into a bedroom for my son.
That totally didn't work out atall, but he ended up in bed
with us.
So after being married forabout five months, I looked at
her and I says we got to get abigger house.
This is just not working.
(30:03):
He said go find one.
So I did and I went to her dadand said we need some financial
help.
He was really nice about it,wanting to help us out.
We're still in the same house,20 some odd years later, and now
I retired February of last year, 24, and I finally start to
(30:24):
feel retired.
Within the last couple of monthsthey're making a movie about me
and my life, called 96 Poundsof Dynamite.
For anybody that might want tobe interested in learning a
little bit more about it.
You can go tohttp//dynamite-filmcom.
The movie is completed.
We got the pleasure to see apreview of it and it's really
(30:48):
really well done documentaryAlmost an hour and a half long.
It started by a guy that saw meplaying in a pool tournament and
he saw me win the pooltournament and he couldn't
believe just how good I was atthe game.
He was just blown away.
And it turned out we had amutual friend and the mutual
(31:09):
friend was somebody I workedwith at the time.
God put things in place to makethis film work out.
Unfortunately, during this lastyear, while we were filming and
everything, I lost my stepdadand then my mom a few months
later, and so that's documentedas well in the film.
But it's really nice havingthat captured, that.
(31:32):
I've got images of my mom thereand being interviewed and even
watching the film here recently.
It was a little bit emotionalfor me just seeing her and
hearing my stepdad.
It's hard to believe they'regone sometimes, you know.
Speaker 3 (31:50):
But it did feel like a God thing that he got to go
and see them again, Because withme not driving anymore, I
couldn't drive him out there andwithout the help he would have
had a harder time going byhimself.
If Lauren wouldn't have donethis, Chad wouldn't have gotten
to see them and wouldn't have iton record.
Speaker 1 (32:12):
Yeah, absolutely Like you said.
It's a God thing, it's theconnecting.
We meet people.
We don't always know offhandwhy we have that connection, and
then the journey justbeautifully unfolds.
What was the most surprisingthing for you while making this
documentary?
Speaker 2 (32:31):
It's a lot of work.
I did not realize just how muchenergy and effort even filming
for like three or four hoursfeels like you work a 12-hour
day.
I mean it just it takes a lotout of you.
When we drove up to Mississippi, we drove for a day, we filmed
for two days and then drove backand it took me two or three
(32:55):
days, just energy-wise, just tobounce back.
It's just a lot of work.
I have an admiration now foractors and actresses how they do
it.
Filming weeks on end.
That's hard work, that's reallyhard work.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Can you all explain what your life is like now, your
daily routine?
Speaker 2 (33:18):
Nowadays our routine is I get up way too early still
I can't stop myself.
I get up usually three or fourin the morning and I have my
coffee and I read my emails andread my newsletters and usually
do all our finance informationand go through and see what TV
shows we're going to watch andthings like that.
(33:40):
And then Allie usually gets upat 7.38, if she's able to sleep
that late, and then we get upand she gets up, she does her
routine and we play gamestogether and then we when,
usually by nine or 10 o'clockit's usually I'm hungry, you
(34:01):
know that type of thing Uh, andthen we start watching TV
together.
We have friends that drive usto play pool when I play pool on
Sundays, one day a week, andshe'll go with me most times Uh,
we go to shop.
Uh, usually go to Costco onWednesdays.
We have a really good life, areally good relaxing life.
(34:21):
Now, like I said, I'm reallynow, just now, feeling like I'm
retired.
You know I don't have thestress of the job and the
paycheck or, you know, worriedabout the paycheck hanging over
my head, so it's a lot nicer.
Speaker 1 (34:37):
Do y'all have a favorite memory?
Speaker 3 (34:40):
Oh, Key West.
Speaker 2 (34:41):
Oh yes, I had an accident at work in 2008,
october of 2008.
I collided with a forklift atwork.
My other wheelchair did 12 anda half miles an hour and I
literally didn't see theforklift park backwards and I
collided with it and I got flungabout four feet through the air
(35:05):
and landed on the left side ofmy skull and ended up in the icu
and the hospital.
And anyway, after healing upfrom that, from about seven
weeks we had planned to go toKey West and so we went ahead
and did it before I went back towork in mid-December.
The way we do Key West israther funny.
(35:28):
We get a hotel room on Key Weston Duval Street, we park the
van and then basically we lookat each other every two hours
and go rum drink and we drinkthe whole weekend and just
wander up and down, you know,duval Street.
We went to the Butterfly Exhibit, we went to the Pirate Museum
(35:52):
and they have an elevator inthere that was built in the
1800s and I was so glad I wasabout half drunk riding up and
down that elevator because it'sthe most scary thing I've ever
done in my entire life, but itwas really cool.
It was just an old, oldelevator.
We people watched and we justwe really enjoyed the food.
(36:13):
They have a restaurant and theystill had it called Better Than
Sex and it's a dessert bar andthey have red plush things and
we're there in December andthey've got Christmas trees up
and I look under the Christmastree and there's a cat laying
there and they have cats wildcats just wandering all over Key
(36:34):
West and I'm a cat person so itwas really cool.
But yeah, she and I have thatgreat memory of vacationing
there.
It's just her and I veryrelaxed and we had a good time.
You know, we do things likethat.
Speaker 1 (36:49):
I love that.
Let's take a minute before wewrap up to talk a little bit
more about a why.
What do you find is the biggestmisconception that people have
who don't have a why?
Speaker 3 (37:04):
People always ask do breaks really hurt, especially
when they see your face and youdon't freak out.
We learned really young whenyou break hold still because it
helps.
When Josh broke his arm atseven he was off playing with
some friends' kids.
They had just said oh, if youguys want to go out for dinner,
drop off Josh.
(37:25):
She called before we left thehouse.
She said Josh is holding hisarm and saying he broke it, but
he's not crying, we'll be rightthere.
So we went and got him.
He broke both bones in his armand he was holding it in place,
went to the urgent care and theyput a splint on it and a week
later he had surgery.
(37:46):
That's all I can think of.
What do you think?
Speaker 2 (37:48):
My funniest misconception is anytime I
answer the phone and it'ssomebody that doesn't know me,
or whatever.
Oh, is your mommy there?
Or okay, mrs McDaniel, I'm likeI get misgendered, I get this
age-wise, you know, or whatever.
But that's just common sillythings.
(38:10):
But on the back, no, I can'tthink of anything really.
Speaker 3 (38:14):
That's why my dad hated to go through the
drive-thru, because he didn'thave a really loud voice and he
would always get called ma'am,and so he just.
You know, it was just easier topark the car, get out, go
inside, order what you wantedright there.
Speaker 1 (38:31):
When people listen to this episode, what do you want
them to take away and remembermost about?
Chad and Allison?
Speaker 2 (38:41):
Kind of what goes into our wrap up here.
There's no magic way to getthrough life and OI and you know
relationships and things likethat, other than just faith and
prayer.
You really have to be able tohave fun with it, to laugh about
it, love about it.
(39:03):
She and I have had a greatrelationship the whole time.
I mean there's been ups anddowns.
We really, I think, got thebest of every day we've been
together.
Speaker 3 (39:13):
And I told him you're not allowed to die first.
It's ladies first.
You have to let me go first,because I just like his mom.
I just don't know how well Iwould take that, because it's
just.
You know, we're going on 22years and I just don't.
Speaker 1 (39:28):
You know your faith you have in God and you find
strength there strength in eachother, strength in family,
strength in adversity I thinkit's amazing.
Strength and family strengthand adversity I think it's
amazing.
Thank you both for sharing yourlives, your wisdom and the
powerful reminder that nochallenge is too great when
you're true to yourself and toeach other.
Chad and Allison, thank you forbeing my guests on the I Need
(39:53):
Blue podcast.
Speaker 2 (39:54):
Thank you for having us.
Speaker 3 (39:56):
Yep, it's been fun.
Everyone has a story.
They just don't always have aplace to share it.
Welcome to I Need Blue, thepodcast about to take you on an
(00:22):
extraordinary journey whereprofound narratives come to life
, one captivating episode at atime.
I'm your host, jennifer Lee,and I founded this podcast
because I know there is healingand sharing.
Each story you will hear sharedon this podcast is a testament
to our collective strength,innate ability to transform in
(00:45):
the incredible power of healing.
Please remember you are neveralone.
Please visit and share mywebsite with those seeking
connection and inspirationwwwineedbluenet.
Thank you, char Good, forcomposing and performing the
introduction medley for I NeedBlue.
(01:07):
You can find information aboutChar on her website,
wwwchargoodcom.
Before starting today's episode,I must provide a trigger
warning.
I Need Blue features graphicthemes, including, but not
limited to, violence, abuse andmurder, and may not be suitable
for all listeners.
(01:28):
Please take care of yourselfand don't hesitate to ask for
help if you need it.
Now let's get started withtoday's story.
Standing at two feet eightinches, chad is a force to
reckon with, not just at thepool table, where he once
dominated as a seasoned shark,but in life itself.
(01:50):
Outspoken and outgoing, chad'senergy is magnetic and when
asked about his disability, heshrugs with a grin.
It doesn't define me.
Born with osteogenesisimperfecta OI a rare genetic
disorder that causes brittlebones, chad's journey began with
(02:12):
a grim prognosis.
When his mother brought himhome from the hospital, the
doctor coldly advised give him apillow, he'll live as long as
he does.
But Chad had other plans.
He carved out a whole vibrantlife, recently retiring from a
successful career as agovernment contractor, a
(02:35):
testament to his grit anddefiance of expectations.
Over two decades ago, fatedialed in when Chad met Allison
after six months of long,heartfelt phone conversations.
When Chad saw her, he knew I'mgoing to marry her.
And he did.
(02:57):
Allison, like Chad, was bornwith OI.
Her childhood was marked withnumerous hospital stays, four
weeks at a time in traction.
They would set her femur boneand she would lay healing.
Their journeys were unique, butwhen asked to describe their
bond, they summed it upperfectly we took different
(03:19):
roads to the same destination.
Together, chad and Allison areliving proof that resilience
isn't just about surviving.
It's about thriving love andfinding joy in every unexpected
term.
I'm honored to introduce twoincredible people whose stories
(03:41):
redefine resilience and love.
Whose stories redefineresilience and love Chad and
Allison.
Thank you for being my guesttoday on the I Need Blue podcast
.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Thank you, Jen, for having us.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
Yes, thank you, you're very welcome.
Okay, chad, let's talk a littlebit about what your childhood
was like going into adulthood,because I know it looked a
little bit different thanAllison's.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Yeah, I was born in a small town called Columbia,
mississippi, a population ofabout 7,000 people.
I was diagnosed, though, withOI when my mom was about seven
months pregnant with me.
Due to an ultrasound, my longbones were curved and it just so
happens the small town doctorhappened to know what OI was and
(04:31):
he was able to diagnose mebefore I was born.
She did have me be a C-sectionand I am clinically diagnosed
with type 3 OI.
The doctor did send me home ina pillow and said, basically he
lives as long as he lives, whichwas kind of scary, but my mom
was a strong person and reallydetermined to let me have the
(04:55):
best life I could have.
I did have to have herniasurgery when I was six weeks old
, and that's the only surgeryI've had in my life, which is
kind of rare for a person withOI.
And they say, well, the numberof people affected by OI in the
US it's really unknown.
They have to guesstimate itbetween 20,000 and 50,000 people
(05:16):
, so it is pretty rare.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
Yeah, and OI can physically appear differently
depending upon the individual.
What were your physicalcharacteristics then, when you
were born?
Speaker 2 (05:31):
I was a pretty small baby.
I was only 5 pounds 12 ounces.
I remember my mother talkingabout trying to find clothes for
me and diapers.
I was so tiny.
It was really difficult Growingup.
I was extremely small.
At six years old I only weighed20 pounds.
You know, my stature is still.
Even now I'm a little heavier.
(05:54):
I'm still really short, at onlytwo foot eight.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Yes, you know, you have a bit of a sense of humor,
which I absolutely appreciate,and you did share a story with
me regarding being so small.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
I was in a grocery cart, or what we call a buggy,
and shopping at Gibson's, whichis kind of like a general
department store, and this olderlady came up to me just
basically said oh, what a nicebaby.
I was probably four or fiveyears old, I am not a baby.
And the lady almost had a heartattack right there, you know,
(06:35):
because I was very sure aboutmyself.
She didn't expect me to talklike that.
So that sort of small town lifetoo in Mississippi you get used
to it a little bit.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Yes, and let's talk about mobility.
What did that look like for you?
Speaker 2 (06:54):
Well, I did get around with a stroller till I
was about six, and thenEasterseals donated me a what I
call puke yellow manualwheelchair, and then, when I was
nine years old, I got my firstpower wheelchair, which allowed
me to get around by myself atschool.
(07:14):
There were some issues withthat, though, because a teacher
and I did a fundraising to getthe wheelchair, and then, when I
got the wheelchair, the schooltried to claim it.
They said it was the school'swheelchair and not my wheelchair
, but yet all the money wentthrough me, all the checks were
made out to me.
(07:34):
I even had my own bank accountwith my name at nine years old,
and they still tried to claimthe wheelchair.
We ended up having to get anadvocate to help clear that up,
and eventually this was in thirdgrade.
Beginning of third grade theyallowed me to use my chair and
take it back and forth.
(07:55):
I rode the short bus, you know,as I jokingly called it, but
actually a big bus that wouldhold about six wheelchairs, and
that power wheelchair was a realbig step for independence, and
my neighbor and I would evenplay woofer ball out in the
street.
I had a lot of fun doing that.
(08:15):
I was just like a regular kid,you know, we would yell car,
everybody would have to go offto the side of the road.
I had a pretty good childhoodin that regard and then, about
11 years old, I started playingbumper pool because they had a
program that would allow thekids to go for a half day and
(08:37):
hang out with the teenagers.
They had hired to kind ofoversee us to play different
games, and it was at theWaterworks building for the city
and they had a foosball tableand, just so happens, they had a
bumper pool table and I reallytook to the game.
I remember having to go get mydad out of the pool hall when I
was much younger, so I knew Ihad some pool blood in me, so to
(09:01):
speak, and I really took to thegame with the angles and the
geometry and the physics,because that's how my brain
worked anyway.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
Great, you started at age 11, then playing pool what
fun.
Let's talk a little bit aboutyour school years, then, and
what that looked like.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
Starting with school when I was about four years old,
I had a homebound teacher thatwould come out two or three days
a week.
After doing this for a coupleof years, she encouraged my mom
to enroll me in Redwood School.
So at age six I did that and Iwas reading at a second grade
level and doing math at a thirdgrade level at age six, which
(09:39):
was pretty good.
But they insisted on putting mein a mentally handicapped class
because they really didn'tdifferentiate between physically
handicapped and mentallyhandicapped.
After being in this class fortwo years my mom kind of got the
idea from that teacher this kidshould probably be in regular
(10:01):
school because of his educationlevel and so I should have
started in third grade.
But they ended up holding meback and they started me in
second grade, ended upgraduating third in my class of
127 students with a 3.87 GPA.
So I had some brains in theresomewhere.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
You had a lot of brains in there.
So then, now after high school,we go into college to further
your education and your career.
Would you like to share alittle bit of that journey with
us?
Speaker 2 (10:36):
Sure, I started college classes actually the
week after I graduated highschool.
I took two classes that summervia the local junior college.
I took speech and compositionand then I went on to three and
a half hours away to MississippiState, to attend college.
It was totally on my own, noparents involved or anything
(10:58):
like that, but it was toughbecause the very first semester
I fell out of my wheelchair andbroke my left femur and that was
the first time I'd everexperienced a break on my own.
It was interesting.
I grew up a little bit learninghow to deal with that myself.
It ended up taking me six yearsto get my degree in computer
(11:19):
science because of all thedistraction I loved to play pool
and I loved to drink beer.
I made some bad choices, Iadmit.
I even tell my kids, you know,I'm not very hard on them about
it because you know I did somestupid things myself.
You know, in that regard I wasjust doing my best to try and be
a normal person, like ateenager that rebels.
(11:41):
Well, I kind of rebelled later,as I call it, and unfortunately
my GPA suffered in college andit did take me six years to get
the degree you know which.
It took four, but I mean, therewas a lot of just learning to be
independent, learning to getthrough life without my parents,
because at the time my parentshad been through a divorce when
(12:03):
I was in high school.
Because at the time my parentshad been through a divorce when
I was in high school, and so itwas me feeling my oats, so to
speak.
You know, talking about mycareer, you know, once I
graduated college I went betweenpart-time jobs, really not able
to make a go of it.
So I reached out to a friendfrom college and his stepdad
(12:30):
actually got me a job in Renodown here in Florida, which is
13 hours away, and they likedwhat they heard from me.
They flew me down and then, afew weeks later, I'm here
working in Florida now.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
And recently retired.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Congratulations, thank you, thank you.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Of course, I have a question.
In your quest for normalcy,what did you find to be the
biggest challenges for you?
Speaker 2 (12:54):
That's a great question.
I think personally it wasdating and having a girlfriend
and having those type ofrelationships.
I found it very difficult.
I think normal women tend topity me more than want to date
(13:18):
me, or they don't see thepositives as much as the
negatives.
And all my life growing upeverybody always told me oh, you
should find you a nice girl ina wheelchair.
And I was just like no, I don'twant to do that, that's no, no,
that's too much responsibility,that would be doubly hard.
(13:39):
And of course then I met mywife.
That all went out the windowquick.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yes, and when you speak of Allison, there is such
love in your heart and in yourwords that you choose, and I am
so excited to include Allison inour conversation today.
So, allison, let's switch overto you and your childhood.
Can you share what that lookedlike with us?
Speaker 3 (14:07):
Well, I started out, was born in New York, my dad was
an electrical engineer, so welived in Long Island and then my
dad got transferred when I wasfour and a half almost five to
California.
California had different ideasof what to do.
My breaks were mostly tibiasback then and so that was just
(14:29):
get patched up at the doctor, acast and home, and I actually
scooted out of a cast once.
I was super skinny and I backedout of a cast, left it behind,
didn't even look back, and mymom found the cast and was
looking around for me.
I had just casts with femurfractures in New York, but in
California the traction was thebig thing and braces the old
(14:51):
leather braces.
So I got fitted for those atfive and I hated them.
I had to talk to my mom's friend, who was a counselor, for every
day for a week, just trying towork out my feelings about these
heavy, sweaty things I wassupposed to wear.
One time I went in my bedroom,I closed the door, I went over
(15:13):
to my bed, I took them off and Istood up just to prove to
myself I still could.
I lied about how I broke in apool once I was doing what the
other kids were doing and it wasstupid.
And I was trying to sit on oneof those paddle boards that
don't want to go under the waterlike the other kids were doing
and of course, I broke a femurin the public pool.
(15:35):
So that was bad.
My two most memorable breaksand most disfiguring when I was
five, my dad and I think he haddone this in New York actually
he was more comfortable using athree wheel bike because he also
had OI and he put a car seat onthe back of it for me.
And then, when my legs gotlonger and he put a board for my
(16:00):
legs to sit on, without sideson it, because who would have
thought I'd need that?
We were waiting for my friend,genevieve Hi, genevieve to come
over for a play date.
I'm excited and we're in thegarage and my mom's trying to
keep me occupied and I beggedher please take me around the
block on the back of the bike.
So she did and she had to pullover to the side of the road to
(16:22):
let a car go by, and it was justenough of a dip to the side
that my right leg swung over andgot caught in the spokes when
she took off again and itsnapped my tibia.
It ended up with an S-shapedcurve and it was a mess.
So I later got that fixed,unfortunately, and that's a
(16:42):
whole nother story, but that wasthe first memorable one.
And then, a couple of yearslater, we were visiting my Aunt,
jan, and my cousins Kim andKelly.
After the visit, my dad drove upto get us and take us back to
California and we were stayingthe night in Colorado Springs.
(17:03):
I had already taken off thoseawful braces I hated, and so I
just, you know, flipped over onmy stomach and scooted off the
bed to go to the bathroom, scootin and go to the bathroom, and
the blankets were a littleslippery and I hit the floor too
hard.
When my knee hit the floor Ibroke my femur.
My dad and the motel owner ormanager, whatever he was, they
(17:27):
together found a board to put meon and this man loaned my dad
his station wagon to drive me tothe hospital and I got a cast
and my dad rigged up the car.
He took the front passengerseat out, put it in the big
(17:48):
trunk Thank God it was a bigtrunk right and then he put the
suitcases and that hoard in thepassenger seat, connecting it to
the back seat.
You know, and that's how I rodeback to California from Colorado
Springs and that's how I got myreally curved left femur, which
that is my strongest point inmy legs was this untouched
(18:08):
curved femur.
So some of the parents nowthink that if it's curved it's
going to break.
You have to fix it.
But my lowers were pretty muchruined by corrective surgery
when I was 17.
So I'm one of the ones thatproves that the surgeries are
not great.
The only other surgery I hadwas one time that the traction
(18:32):
didn't set my leg.
It set wrong.
The doctor put me under tobreak it and I still remember
what my dad stuck around andwatched with me to keep me calm
American Graffiti was on TV.
So I still get that little bitof anxiety because needles that
(18:53):
was the part that I hated themost being a kid in the hospital
was the needle you know Iwanted to ask.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Coming from from somebody who, knock on wood, has
never broken a bone with asoften as you talk about you know
you've had these breaks thefemur, the tibia.
That to me sounds likeexcruciating pain.
Speaker 3 (19:12):
It is, it's not, it's not good.
Femurs, especially because Ihad six of them between 10 and
12.
And femurs, especially becauseI had six of them between 10 and
12.
Because, okay, so I went fromthe little skinny kid that was
back up immediately on my feet.
They would stick the little nubthing on the bottom of your
cast and I'd be on it within acouple of days, walking and
(19:32):
scooting out of it and all that.
And then when we moved toCalifornia, by fourth grade I
had been begging to get to go topublic school.
So, kindergarten, I went topublic school until I broke and
then ended up home with the hometeacher.
First grade.
My parents found thishandicapped school so they stuck
(19:53):
me in there.
First grade was great becausethere was both mentally and just
physically disabled kids and Ihad a lot of friends and it was
great.
Second grade started all thosekids that didn't need to be in
there were matriculated intoregular school and it was just
me and this girl who was almostnever there.
And my parents saw how bored Iwas after two weeks and they
pulled me out and they put me ina handicap school.
(20:16):
I was there for second and thirdgrade and my dad thought the
smaller class sizes would besafer, since I was still walking
.
I made a deal with him, which Ikind of regret.
But for fourth grade I said ifI use grandma's wheelchair, will
you let me go to public school?
And they agreed.
That's when the series of femurbreaks started, because I
(20:38):
strength the braces, hadweakened my muscles so I didn't
have the muscle protecting thebone.
My dad did all kinds of tricksafter the surgery.
When I was 17 he built aplatform that he could hand
crank up to slowly make theslant steeper.
That was uncomfortable, but andthen he started just whacking
(21:00):
the end of the cast with a boardto try to help stimulate blood
flow to the you know, thefracture site.
He was creative, but he was anengineer.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
Yeah, I was going to say that that's awesome, and he
was able to use his creativemind and look at a situation and
try to come up with ways tomake life easier for you, you
know.
Speaking of parents, what doyou think it was like for them
to have to watch their child inso much pain?
What do you think it was likefor them?
Speaker 3 (21:29):
Well, my dad and my aunt both had about as many
breaks as I did, but they wereupright the whole time so they
didn't use the wheelchair.
And then my grandmother alsohad OI.
She had less breaks, I think,but she had the different length
legs like me, she had a backbrace.
I don't know if it's easier ifyou've had OI yourself or these
(21:52):
poor parents that just find outabout it because their kid has
the mutation, like Chad's momwent through.
I don't know.
A lot of them feel guilt and mydad, I think, felt a lot of
guilt because he believeddoctors that actually said well,
(22:14):
because you have it pretty mildand your wife doesn't have it,
it'll be somewhere in between.
And that's not how it works.
You have a 50% chance ofpassing it if one parent has it
and if two parents have it, it'sfour 25% chances, either your
type, your husband's type, bothor none none.
Speaker 2 (22:44):
Neither of my parents had a life and so, growing up,
my mother it's funny because mymother smoked.
She's passed away now.
But when Allison and I werefirst dating, allison fell out
of her wheelchair in East LA.
It was really nobody's fault.
She got a new chair.
It had two smaller tires in thefront and she ended up flipping
forwards and landing on herright femur and breaking it.
(23:08):
And this is in East LA, rightoutside the train station.
It was a harrowing day.
It was just a rough day Becausehere I am as her fiance looking
at her going.
There's nothing I can do to fixher.
I'm helpless at this point.
Anyway, at the end of that day,finally, when I was able to
(23:31):
take a breath, I picked up thephone and I called my mother and
I told my mother I now know whyyou smoke, because the stress
of that day alone was justphenomenal.
And if I could tell a reallyquick story, it's really a
testament to Allison's Allisonand her resiliency.
(23:51):
Right after we got married, justa few weeks, our son broke his
right leg.
Her daughter was watching himin the hospital.
Allison was like we need toride the leg and I was more
cautioned, more of the doctor.
I said well, let's see what thedoctor says.
The doctor didn't want to rideit.
Thankfully, I agree with thatdecision.
(24:12):
And so later on, you know,three-year-old Josh just is
still.
He's dragging this body castaround, just wanting to go and
do.
Sure enough, literally the dayafter he got out of the cast we
catch him.
He's standing up on the legagain.
You know, he is not going toslow down.
(24:33):
It was like no, he shouldn't berunning for weeks, or blah,
blah, blah.
And I looked at her and shelooked at me.
Speaker 3 (24:46):
I go.
You think we're going to slowthis three-year-old down?
Yeah right.
Speaker 1 (24:48):
That was exactly me.
I was on it as quickly as I wasallowed to.
Yeah, let's move on to y'all'slove story.
Speaker 2 (24:52):
I love that Sure January of 2002, january of 2002
, we had started talking to eachother at the urgency of two
friends.
We had sort of knew of eachother in probably 95, 96
(25:12):
timeframe because we were bothmembers of the same mailing list
out of Australia that dealswith our disability.
Our two friends both said, hey,you two should kind of talk to
each other, and yada, yada, yada.
And so we did.
We emailed each other and weprobably talked on internet,
instant messenger, and then westarted talking on the phone.
You know, back and forth.
It just so happens in 2002,there was a conference on our
(25:37):
disability in Orlando.
We both kind of agreed nothingelse.
We'll be good friends and nopressure.
Let's not, do you know anything?
Serious pressure to gettogether or anything like that.
It just so happens I had awheelchair and her daughter was
coming flying in with her, and Itold her I says, oh, we'll just
(25:58):
pick you up from the airport.
So my friend Donna and I showedup at the airport and we went
to see her.
I do what she looked like andeverything.
We picked her up and I rememberif she was wheeling away from
me, I looked at her and Ithought to myself I said that's
the one I'm gonna marry.
And then I told myself, chad,do not think that, do not set
(26:18):
yourself up for failure.
You know how you get, you knowhow you overthink things.
And so I was like, okay, I gotto calm down, okay, but as fate
would have it, we were just allover each other that weekend.
It was like there wasconferences, eight or nine
conferences a day, you know.
For three days I think we mayhave went to two, maybe three.
(26:41):
We would be sneaking offsomewhere.
Heck, we even went back out tomy van in the parking lot to
make out.
You know, I mean, we were justlike young teenagers here, we
were in our early 30s doing thisand it was crazy, you know, it
was just crazy.
I really fell for her, you know,I really loved her and I ended
up, because of who I worked for,I was able to get cheap flights
(27:04):
going back and forth betweenOrlando and LA.
I was getting $175 round-tripflights almost monthly to go out
to see her, and so I would goout there, and her dad was
really awesome about helping meset up to get in and out of my
wheelchair and set up the showerthere, and I even surprised her
(27:26):
.
I showed up on Thanksgiving.
She didn't even know I wascoming, you know, and that was
just so awesome.
The previous month, in October,I proposed to her to marry her
and I bought her daughter a ringas well.
I gave her a birthstone ring aswell.
I remember it was so cold, itwas drizzling rain on a baseball
(27:52):
field on the first base side,in the dugout of all things
Probably the most unromanticthing you could do, but I really
wanted to marry her.
We had decided to get marriedthe next year and it just made
sense in our life.
Okay, let's make a go of it.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
We started talking and it was just like we'd known
each other forever, the momentthat I really realized this is
the one for me, this one, thisis it.
I was on a date with somebodyelse.
He had to leave for anappointment and as I'm scooting
out of this little bench thingyou know the tables with the
(28:27):
benches I felt what felt like abreak in my femur, my right
femur, and I stopped, I frozeand I said you know, you go
ahead and go to your appointment, I'm just going to sit here for
a minute.
And I got him to leave and thenI tried to get ahold of my dad.
I had to wait a couple hours, soI immediately called Chad and I
(28:48):
knew it was work day.
He was at work.
He stayed on the phone with me,on speaker, where all his
buddies could hear, for twohours, just trying to keep me
sane because I was starting tofreak out.
Because, you know, at first youdon't feel much because the
adrenaline kicks in and if youdon't get things taken care of
(29:08):
while you're still in that state, it's just a little nutty.
And he stayed right there withme and I thought, oh my gosh,
this is the one If you're notwith somebody who understands.
You can't connect on the samelevel.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
I mean it becomes more than breaking wind in front
of each other.
You really have, I guess, lessinhibitions.
You know you don't.
If you've got somebody that's afellow disabled, especially
with the same disability.
You know about the pain and howto overcome it, how to pray
through it, how to cope with it.
(29:42):
And we moved into my tiny home.
It was a thousand square foothome and it was only two
bedrooms and I made the backporch into a bedroom for my son.
That totally didn't work out atall, but he ended up in bed
with us.
So after being married forabout five months, I looked at
her and I says we got to get abigger house.
This is just not working.
(30:03):
He said go find one.
So I did and I went to her dadand said we need some financial
help.
He was really nice about it,wanting to help us out.
We're still in the same house,20 some odd years later, and now
I retired February of last year, 24, and I finally start to
(30:24):
feel retired.
Within the last couple of monthsthey're making a movie about me
and my life, called 96 Poundsof Dynamite.
For anybody that might want tobe interested in learning a
little bit more about it.
You can go tohttp//dynamite-filmcom.
The movie is completed.
We got the pleasure to see apreview of it and it's really
(30:48):
really well done documentaryAlmost an hour and a half long.
It started by a guy that saw meplaying in a pool tournament and
he saw me win the pooltournament and he couldn't
believe just how good I was atthe game.
He was just blown away.
And it turned out we had amutual friend and the mutual
(31:09):
friend was somebody I workedwith at the time.
God put things in place to makethis film work out.
Unfortunately, during this lastyear, while we were filming and
everything, I lost my stepdadand then my mom a few months
later, and so that's documentedas well in the film.
But it's really nice havingthat captured, that.
(31:32):
I've got images of my mom thereand being interviewed and even
watching the film here recently.
It was a little bit emotionalfor me just seeing her and
hearing my stepdad.
It's hard to believe they'regone sometimes, you know.
Speaker 3 (31:50):
But it did feel like a God thing that he got to go
and see them again, Because withme not driving anymore, I
couldn't drive him out there andwithout the help he would have
had a harder time going byhimself.
If Lauren wouldn't have donethis, Chad wouldn't have gotten
to see them and wouldn't have iton record.
Speaker 1 (32:12):
Yeah, absolutely Like you said.
It's a God thing, it's theconnecting.
We meet people.
We don't always know offhandwhy we have that connection, and
then the journey justbeautifully unfolds.
What was the most surprisingthing for you while making this
documentary?
Speaker 2 (32:31):
It's a lot of work.
I did not realize just how muchenergy and effort even filming
for like three or four hoursfeels like you work a 12-hour
day.
I mean it just it takes a lotout of you.
When we drove up to Mississippi, we drove for a day, we filmed
for two days and then drove backand it took me two or three
(32:55):
days, just energy-wise, just tobounce back.
It's just a lot of work.
I have an admiration now foractors and actresses how they do
it.
Filming weeks on end.
That's hard work, that's reallyhard work.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Can you all explain what your life is like now, your
daily routine?
Speaker 2 (33:18):
Nowadays our routine is I get up way too early still
I can't stop myself.
I get up usually three or fourin the morning and I have my
coffee and I read my emails andread my newsletters and usually
do all our finance informationand go through and see what TV
shows we're going to watch andthings like that.
(33:40):
And then Allie usually gets upat 7.38, if she's able to sleep
that late, and then we get upand she gets up, she does her
routine and we play gamestogether and then we when,
usually by nine or 10 o'clockit's usually I'm hungry, you
(34:01):
know that type of thing Uh, andthen we start watching TV
together.
We have friends that drive usto play pool when I play pool on
Sundays, one day a week, andshe'll go with me most times Uh,
we go to shop.
Uh, usually go to Costco onWednesdays.
We have a really good life, areally good relaxing life.
(34:21):
Now, like I said, I'm reallynow, just now, feeling like I'm
retired.
You know I don't have thestress of the job and the
paycheck or, you know, worriedabout the paycheck hanging over
my head, so it's a lot nicer.
Speaker 1 (34:37):
Do y'all have a favorite memory?
Speaker 3 (34:40):
Oh, Key West.
Speaker 2 (34:41):
Oh yes, I had an accident at work in 2008,
october of 2008.
I collided with a forklift atwork.
My other wheelchair did 12 anda half miles an hour and I
literally didn't see theforklift park backwards and I
collided with it and I got flungabout four feet through the air
(35:05):
and landed on the left side ofmy skull and ended up in the icu
and the hospital.
And anyway, after healing upfrom that, from about seven
weeks we had planned to go toKey West and so we went ahead
and did it before I went back towork in mid-December.
The way we do Key West israther funny.
(35:28):
We get a hotel room on Key Weston Duval Street, we park the
van and then basically we lookat each other every two hours
and go rum drink and we drinkthe whole weekend and just
wander up and down, you know,duval Street.
We went to the Butterfly Exhibit, we went to the Pirate Museum
(35:52):
and they have an elevator inthere that was built in the
1800s and I was so glad I wasabout half drunk riding up and
down that elevator because it'sthe most scary thing I've ever
done in my entire life, but itwas really cool.
It was just an old, oldelevator.
We people watched and we justwe really enjoyed the food.
(36:13):
They have a restaurant and theystill had it called Better Than
Sex and it's a dessert bar andthey have red plush things and
we're there in December andthey've got Christmas trees up
and I look under the Christmastree and there's a cat laying
there and they have cats wildcats just wandering all over Key
(36:34):
West and I'm a cat person so itwas really cool.
But yeah, she and I have thatgreat memory of vacationing
there.
It's just her and I veryrelaxed and we had a good time.
You know, we do things likethat.
Speaker 1 (36:49):
I love that.
Let's take a minute before wewrap up to talk a little bit
more about a why.
What do you find is the biggestmisconception that people have
who don't have a why?
Speaker 3 (37:04):
People always ask do breaks really hurt, especially
when they see your face and youdon't freak out.
We learned really young whenyou break hold still because it
helps.
When Josh broke his arm atseven he was off playing with
some friends' kids.
They had just said oh, if youguys want to go out for dinner,
drop off Josh.
(37:25):
She called before we left thehouse.
She said Josh is holding hisarm and saying he broke it, but
he's not crying, we'll be rightthere.
So we went and got him.
He broke both bones in his armand he was holding it in place,
went to the urgent care and theyput a splint on it and a week
later he had surgery.
(37:46):
That's all I can think of.
What do you think?
Speaker 2 (37:48):
My funniest misconception is anytime I
answer the phone and it'ssomebody that doesn't know me,
or whatever.
Oh, is your mommy there?
Or okay, mrs McDaniel, I'm likeI get misgendered, I get this
age-wise, you know, or whatever.
But that's just common sillythings.
(38:10):
But on the back, no, I can'tthink of anything really.
Speaker 3 (38:14):
That's why my dad hated to go through the
drive-thru, because he didn'thave a really loud voice and he
would always get called ma'am,and so he just.
You know, it was just easier topark the car, get out, go
inside, order what you wantedright there.
Speaker 1 (38:31):
When people listen to this episode, what do you want
them to take away and remembermost about?
Chad and Allison?
Speaker 2 (38:41):
Kind of what goes into our wrap up here.
There's no magic way to getthrough life and OI and you know
relationships and things likethat, other than just faith and
prayer.
You really have to be able tohave fun with it, to laugh about
it, love about it.
(39:03):
She and I have had a greatrelationship the whole time.
I mean there's been ups anddowns.
We really, I think, got thebest of every day we've been
together.
Speaker 3 (39:13):
And I told him you're not allowed to die first.
It's ladies first.
You have to let me go first,because I just like his mom.
I just don't know how well Iwould take that, because it's
just.
You know, we're going on 22years and I just don't.
Speaker 1 (39:28):
You know your faith you have in God and you find
strength there strength in eachother, strength in family,
strength in adversity I thinkit's amazing.
Strength and family strengthand adversity I think it's
amazing.
Thank you both for sharing yourlives, your wisdom and the
powerful reminder that nochallenge is too great when
you're true to yourself and toeach other.
Chad and Allison, thank you forbeing my guests on the I Need
(39:53):
Blue podcast.
Speaker 2 (39:54):
Thank you for having us.
Speaker 3 (39:56):
Yep, it's been fun.
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