I Read a Thing

I Read a Thing

A deep dive podcast by Emma & Jolie. The subtle art of pointless immersion in a new, strange topic every other Friday.

Episodes

April 23, 2021 98 min

Joseph Smith was a simple man. He liked unlimited power, cronies that kissed his ass, women he could trick into marrying him, and doctors he could coerce into giving those women abortions; a real Live-Lie-Love kind of guy. In this episode, we talk about what made Joe take his magical mystery tour to several different midwest American cities and how he managed to get God to co-author a stock options agreement for his mansion.

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Sex, Drugs, and MONEY! No, this isn't an episode about -insert relevant rock-n-roll star name-, this is all about the freaky founder of the Latter Day Saints, AKA Mormons. This episode covers Joseph Smith's unlikely beginnings as a prophet, his family drama, and his healthy appreciation for hallucinogenic mushrooms.

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February 5, 2021 58 min

What do lightbulbs, fireflies, and the long-buried bones of the Radium Girls all have in common? That's right, they all glow! Join us on a deep dive that will cement your distaste for capitalism and make you really glad you live in a time where it's not common to have highly radioactive materials in your household goods. 

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Have you ever looked at a Flat Earther and thought "how could they level up this craziness?" WELCOME TO BLOOD OVER INTENT, MOTHER-TRUCKERS! In this deep dive, we talk about the CLEARLY NOT A MURDER CULT starting up in Oregon, James Cameron as God, Covid in the Matrix, and the Reptilian overlords hiding the truth about the Garden of Eden.

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January 8, 2021 69 min

Have you ever looked at a baby, puppy, or object and thought "YOU'RE SO CUTE I'M GONNA BASH YOUR HEAD IN"? No? Just us? Moving right along.  In today's deep dive we cover the evolutionary purpose behind cuteness aggression and why it (probably) won't make you literally eat a baby.

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December 24, 2020 89 min

Saucy Jack loved three things in life: long walks, vulnerable women, and world domination. Join us on a deep dive of some of the most insane (and plausible) theories on the identity of Jack the Ripper, the psychological impact of murder mysteries, and the depressing anti-vice history of Whitechapel that brought worldwide notoriety to this serial killer.

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In a world where mentally ill people demanded bodily autonomy and women had opinions about things, one man dared to dream. In this deep dive we'll discuss the storied history of the men who thought taking out frontal lobes was a good solution to everything from schizophrenia to toddler tantrums.

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November 20, 2020 68 min

From the man who brought you tree-phones, the OG Spotify, and started the first Air Force AS A SIDE HUSTLE just to make you feel lazy...make way for Muzak.  The company that became a genre and ruffled a lot of feathers with their made-to-ignore bland creations.

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October 23, 2020 72 min

Do you believe the spirits of the dead can speak to you through white noise? Do you want to find a special Paranormal Pal? In this deep dive episode, we listen to spooky EVPs (Electronic Voice Phenomena) and try to figure out if Jolie's house is haunted.  

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It's Spooky Season, bitches!  In honor of Halloween we decided to use this episode to fuck around, errrr, record some true scary stories including everything from witches hating Muzak executives to EVPs that will make your butt clench up. WELCOME TO SEASON TWO!!!

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Domestication Syndrome is not what happens when you move in with your new partner and stop shaving your legs. Join us for a shallow dive into the basics of domestication including why we can't ride zebras and how some people think we humans domesticated ourselves.

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This one took forever to release because of extreme technical f@!kery, but here it is.  Let's do a super shallow dive on Ghislaine Maxwell, notorious partner of Jeffrey Epstein, who famously had a super secret island where he'd "hire" underaged "massage therapists" for himself and his famous friends. We will also discuss why aluminum foil won't hide your cell phone, Karen.  

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August 9, 2020 1 min

Just a little teaser trailer...or a warning.  Fan mail, hate mail, entries from your dream diary...we want them all! Email questions, comments, and topic suggestions to info@ireadathing.com or visit us at ireadathing.com.  You can also subscribe and message us on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, and Instagram.

Music:  "A Magical Journey Through Space" by Leonell Cassio, licensed under a  Creative Commons License.

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August 7, 2020 62 min

America in the 1950s was a special time full of Elvis Presley, The Golden Age of Television, and LSD brainwashing initiatives covertly run by the CIA.  Join us on a deep dive of MK Ultra that will make you question any remaining American pride you may have.

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When Myka and Jim Stauffer "rehomed" their adopted son, the world got a first hand look at the shady business of family vlogging.  On this deep dive, we'll tackle the sick, sad world of reality television, child abuse, and having babies for ad revenue. Bonus! We actually released a video with this episode so you can see our big dumb heads making the noises that communicate the words that make up the podcast. View on our...

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July 10, 2020 65 min

You would think after this many years of space exploration, we'd have the small issue of how to poop in space under control. Let's take a deep dive into the problematic world of space toilets, astronaut penises, and DIAPERS. 

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Helena Petrovna Blavatsky had it all, aristocratic lineage, intelligence, and enough imagination to rewrite her story when things didn't go her way. Join us on a deep dive into the world of the godmother of the New Age Movement, mental illness, Russian folklore, white people whitin' around, and more lies than you can shake several sticks at. 

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Join us on a deep dive into the wild world of the Psychic Friends Network, Miss Cleo, fraud, fake cancers, bad acting, shady business practices, and keeping people on the hook for $4.99/minute.  CALL ME NOW FOR AN EXPENSIVE READING.  

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What does the Black Plague, Russian Flu, Spanish Flu, and Coronavirus have in common (besides the obvious)?  Join us on a deep dive into pandemic PTSD, mass hysteria, conspiracy theories, and humans generally acting foolish.

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June 12, 2020 71 min

Neuro-linguistic programming is the brainchild of two nerds, one a raging sociopath who tried to kill his dad and definitely probably allegedly killed his friend's girlfriend.  Join us on a deep dive into pseudoscience, questionable ethics, murder, and pickup artists.

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