Letter to Myself - Eury

Part 2 of the “Letter to Myself” series comes from Eury. Follow him as he reminds his younger self that that the sacrifices he made were not in vain and were necessary for his evolution into manhood.

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Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Dear me, as I write this letter, I've revisited key chapters in my life, each distinct yet

(00:09):
profoundly interconnected, woven by the emotions and expressions that shaped who I've become.
From the very start, the world was a canvas of bright hopes and dark fears.
You were hopeful, eyes wide, with the innocence and wonder of a child, with the mother that
instilled confidence to know that you can achieve anything, and a father to show you the work

(00:34):
ethic needed to achieve it.
Yet amidst this hope, there were moments when the shadows of fear and hopelessness crept
in, chilling your heart.
Despite it all, remember this, you were never alone, always protected by unseen arms.

(01:00):
The hurtful things that happened, those weren't your fault.
You were just a child, and the world sometimes forgets how fragile a child's heart is.
As you grew into a teenager, you felt truly lost, wandering through the maze of adolescence,
feeling indifferent and often like an outcast.

(01:23):
You found a deeper love in basketball, because for once you felt included and sought after.
Outside those lines, though, it was back to the reality of never truly feeling like you
fit in.
To you I say it's okay to have been different.
It's okay that you ponder deeply about who you are, that answers, though elusive, were

(01:46):
always there with you and within you.
You didn't know any better then, and I'm proud of you for embarking on a journey of self-discovery
despite the loneliness you felt it brought.
Life hit fast once you moved away from your parents' home.
You left your sister when she was eight, all to chase a dream at fifteen.

(02:14):
To this day, you're still conflicted on that decision, but ambition fueled you, headstrong
and sometimes egotistical, as you navigated the tricky transition into adulthood.
You carry a certain regret from that time in your life that you know you can never really
make up for.

(02:36):
No amount of phone calls or FaceTimes will make up for how you felt about leaving your
sister at that time, knowing what she would have to endure as she grew up.
You made life-changing decisions and took risks that I'm so proud of.

(02:57):
You showed yourself what you were capable of, created opportunities for yourself, failed
and bounced back plenty.
You learned about the world and yourself on a deeper level.
You found yourself filling the void you created by leaving those you love most by indulging

(03:17):
in partying, sex and drugs.
You confused sex with love and began to understand that many will love you for what you can do
for them rather than who you are.
These years were about discovering your strengths and your flaws alike.

(03:42):
While in the Navy, everyone seemed to see an exciting life filled with travel and new
experiences.
Yet solitude and sadness often clouded your skies during this period.
Took a few years to recover from always being away from family on birthdays, holidays, funerals.

(04:05):
You felt distant from it all.
You learned to find peace in the solitude and be comfortable with your being, gaining
confidence in who you are.
With what you experienced and what you witnessed during this time, the weight got heavy.
When the weight seemed unbearable, divine intervention offered a sliver of light.

(04:29):
Thank you for turning towards that light, for seeking solace and faith.
You've come to understand your worth alive, which is immeasurable.
I apologize to those I hurt and forgive those who have hurt me.
It all taught me an invaluable lesson.
You have a family now.

(04:50):
You just got out the Navy.
A family you were blessed to create.
Many feelings were colliding instantaneously for the first couple of years.
The beauty of family, the anxiety of not being able to provide how you felt you needed to.
Desperation clashed with triumph.

(05:11):
Yet through it all, you became unstoppable.
You flirted with the thought of ending your struggles in silence.
You felt more valuable dead than alive.
Yet you chose to embrace life.
Genuine love finally found its way to you, teaching you to stop self-sabotaging because
you truly deserve the good in life.

(05:34):
This was a time to stop merely surviving and truly start living.
Thank you for not giving up on yourself and continuing to give your best effort.
Now joy, gratitude, and a powerful sense of worth define you.

(05:54):
You are worthy.
You are deserving.
The most healing, the healing you've embraced is not just for you, but for others too.
My heart is full of thanks to every part of me that fought to survive each phase.
Thank you for still being here, for we have a long promising road ahead.

(06:17):
Reflecting on these moments, the tears that come are not just of sorrow, but also of joy
and pride.
Each stage with its own struggles and victories has not been easy, but they were necessary.
They made me who I am, and for that I am eternally grateful.

(06:41):
With all the love I have, me.