September 21, 2024 • 46 mins
Welcome! Are you in a moment of change right now? Maybe you're facing some depressing stuff. Either way, you can trust God has hope for you.
This testimony is all about hope and how to have joy in hope even while the worst is happening. HEADS UP-- about halfway through recording this, I interrupted recording it to go and help my youngest son who was in a life or death situation (#dadlife). I had a lot of joy knowing he was okay and that God was with us to help with that.
GOD HAS A FUTURE FOR YOU THAT IS BRIGHT AND FULL OF HOPE! Never give up! I'd encourage you to share this with someone you think could be encouraged by it.
This episode is another episode in our series on Hope. This Fall (and into 2025) we'll be focusing on God's hope for His people! Be sure to SUBSCRIBE and like and SHARE to get the most out of this episode and this upcoming series. PLEASE go to YouTube (or wherever else you get your podcasts) to watch, subscribe, and/or rate us 5 stars ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐!
Shalom!
Become a sponsor: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1863312/support
Links: https://beacons.ai/inrest
Instagram: @inrest.insta | https://www.instagram.com/inrest.insta/
Facebook: @inrestpodcast | https://www.fb.com/inrestinstitute
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@inrest
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Noah James Wiebe (00:04):
Hello and welcome to the In Rest Podcast
with Noah James Wiebe.
I am your host, oah, and todaywe are going to be talking about
hope.
So hope we've talked about itbefore.
We're talking about it againbecause we are jumping into a
series on hope.
I got some amazing guests aheadfor you this fall and I'm so
(00:25):
excited to interview them andget that going.
However, today we're going tobe talking about hope.
You can probably hear all of mykids talking in the background,
so we're going to actually talkabout a snippet of my story,
and especially as that storypertains to having my kids come
into my life.
(00:45):
The Bible tells us in Romans 12,verse 12, "'rejoice in hope, be
patient in affliction, "'befaithful in prayer'".
Be joyful in hope, be patientin affliction, be faithful in
prayer Romans 12, verse 12.
As we're gonna jump in, what Iwant to do is actually want us
(01:07):
to pray.
Maybe you've been strugglingwith hope lately, maybe there's
a reason why you turned on thisparticular podcast episode today
, and so I want to pray for us.
Lord Jesus, I thank you fortoday.
I thank you for the kindnessthat you have for us, the love
that you have for us.
Help me and help my listenertoday to rest in your
(01:31):
graciousness and in yourkindness.
I pray, god, that you wouldhelp us to rest in the goodness
that you have for us and thekindness that you have for us.
God, I thank you that yourkindness does not depend on our
perfect performance, but ratherupon your perfect love for us.
So I just pray that whoever'slistening or watching today
(01:52):
would be the exact right peoplethat need to be hearing this
today.
The right person.
Even if it's just one personthat needed to hear it today, I
pray that that would be theperson that's hearing and
listening today to the In Restpodcast, and so I just pray that
you would bless this episode,that you bless this time.
I just invite you into thisspace, no matter how long it
might take probably going to bea short time but I pray you
bless it either way, in Jesusname, amen.
(02:14):
Okay, so yeah, here we goRejoice in hope or be joyful in
hope, be patient in affliction,be faithful in prayer.
Long while ago, my wife and I,we were really excited to have
our first son, so our first son,who later would be named Levi.
He did not come to us untilabout three years into our
(02:35):
marriage.
So I was married, probably, youknow, a year after I graduated
from high school, so I was only19 years old when I got married.
That story brought me throughuniversity, or most of my
university days in Bible college, up to the point where I was
about to graduate.
So that particular summer I'ddone a lot of work to prepare in
order to leave university, toleave the apartment that we had
(02:58):
stayed in, to leave behindeverything in that season, and
we just felt this sense from theLord that it was time to have a
baby.
We had prayed about havingchildren in the past and now,
after three years of us beingmarried, there is just, there is
a clear sense Now is the time,now is the now is the time to to
, you know, to have a baby.
(03:18):
And so we stopped not tryingand eventually my wife conceived
and we were able to have, uh,have, a pregnancy, and it was a
beautiful pregnancy.
It was like a blessing to mywife.
My wife struggles with chronicpain, so to be able to have her
experience a season where thatpain actually subsided a bit
(03:39):
during her pregnancy, which waskind of surprising, um, and she
was probably at the peak herpeak health as an adult.
Up to that point.
It was just a blessing to havea healthy pregnancy, to be
blessed in that way, and we werereally encouraged by that.
So, of course, you know, ninemonths goes by by the time we
have come to the hospital tohave our baby.
(04:01):
We had moved to another province, moved into a brand new house,
or I shouldn't say brand new.
We had moved to anotherprovince, moved into a brand new
house, or I shouldn't say brandnew.
It was new to us.
It was a old house, it was like111 years old, and we moved
there.
We had, you know, renovated theplace a little bit, sort of to
get it to the capacity that itneeded to be, so that we could
have our baby, have our family.
(04:22):
We had started a new job.
I had started a new job as achildren and family pastor,
children and youth pastor, andit was a beautiful season for us
, that season of change,especially as we were coming out
of our first province, you know, new Brunswick, into our new
province of serving in NovaScotia.
(04:43):
There was a season of changewhere, in the difficulty of the
change, there was sadness anddepression.
Oftentimes the difficulty of achange is not so much of the
change itself.
It's just, it's the difficultyof depression in the midst of
the change, and part of thereason why that happens is
because there's a there's a lossthat happens to us when we let
(05:05):
go of a particular season andmove into a new one.
There is a sense of loss thathappens when we step away from
relationships that we arefamiliar with, that we have to
now have a season of distance.
There is loss and grief thathappens when we say goodbye to
things that we really cherished,about one season moving into
(05:26):
another.
We're in a similar season now,actually, of moving into a
season of change and transition.
We're saying goodbye to thishouse that we've been living in
and this season of life and ourchildren being babies.
You know, like our, ouryoungest son.
He is three years old now,which means that there's not
many little boy days left.
(05:47):
You know like soon he's goingto be, he's going to be a big
boy.
You know he's going to grow up,he's going to go to school, and
that's sad.
There's sadness that comes with, you know, letting go of those
younger days of your child'slife.
And so we're in a season nowagain of change and transition.
During that season back then,which was years ago, that was
(06:07):
something that really wasjarring to me.
I did not expect to experiencedepression in the midst of
change, and around that time Igot a book from my friend, don,
who was a mentor to me.
He was a pastor to me, he hadapprenticed me in ministry to
help me grow into the pastorthat I am and the man that I am
today, and he left me with abook called All Things New, and
(06:28):
I had it here in the officesomewhere, and basically the
premise of the book is that ourhope as Christians is found in
the love of God and in thefuture that he has for his
people, which is assured, andthat future is characterized by
the renewing of all things.
Everything you love about thisworld that has been destroyed,
(06:52):
everything that God has lovedabout what he has made that has
been lost, is going to bereclaimed and restored.
And when Jesus comes again,he's going to renew all things.
He's going to bring the renewalof all things, the perigenesis
or the perigenesis genesis,again, again, genesis right,
again, beginning.
And so there's a sense of a newbeginning and new seasons that
(07:12):
we have where, you know, we havea sense of experience of
something new being made or anew beginning, and that's that
new beginning is what God istelling us to root our hope in.
So, in the midst of that newbeginning that was stressful and
difficult, god was reminding meof the hope of a new beginning
to come.
That would be an ultimate newbeginning, that would be a
(07:35):
complete restoration of allthings.
And when I was asking God aboutthe word of the year okay, what
, what do you go?
Well, god, what do you want meto focus on?
What are some of the things, aswe come into this new season,
that you want me to process?
It was hope, you know.
Hope in the thing that I haveahead for you, hope in the thing
that is to come, therestoration of all things,
(07:55):
regardless of what happens next.
Hope, you know.
And so obviously, there was alot of hope for that new
beginning, because beautifulthings were happening and, in
fact, we were living in probablyone of the most beautiful
places in the world and I knowthat sounds like a hyperbole, it
sounds a little over the top,but it really was and really is
one of the most beautiful placesin the world from my
(08:16):
perspective.
And so that season, by the timewe got to me graduating from
university, us taking on thisnew job, all these things, all
this happening all around thesame time that my baby is about
to be born.
New beginnings, right, hope forthe future.
Good things are coming likehope, hope, hope, hope.
I'm not sure about you.
(08:38):
I want you to pause on this andmaybe and reflect on it.
But, like, what are some of thethings in this new season maybe
that you're coming to, or aseason in the past that was new?
What are some of the thingsthat gave you a sense of
expectation?
Because that's what hope isreally about.
It's not really about.
Hope is not about having a vainwish for something that is like
a hope, a kind of hope, but whatI'm talking about is an assured
(08:59):
sense of expectation, right?
So when God's word tells us torejoice in hope or be joyful in
hope, what he's saying is not tobe happy about some sort of
vain wish.
Rather, he's talking aboutsomething that's assured, right?
Um paul says earlier on in thatsame letter to the book, uh, to
the to the church in rome, hesays in romans, chapter 5 hope
(09:20):
does not put us to shame,because the love of god has been
poured into our hearts by theHoly Spirit or through the Holy
Spirit, and so you know, thishope that he's talking about is
something that is like a bedrockkind of hope, and it's an
expectation.
So what are some of the thingsthat brought a sense of
expectation for you in that oldseason?
I want you to hold that in mindas I talk about the rest of
(09:41):
this, because a lot of thethings that I expected to happen
did not.
A lot of the things that Iexpected to happen were
completely changed and upsidedown, and when my son was
finally born, he really was likeperfect, like I mean as perfect
as a little baby boy could be.
My wife's pregnancy ended alittle differently than we had
(10:02):
planned on, because she had tohave an emergency C-section.
She had to have a differentrecovery time that we had
planned on, and so there'sdifferences there.
There's also a difference inthe terms of, like the timing of
how things worked out.
We had a wedding to attend, afamily member's wedding.
My brother's wedding was comingup, and so we were going to go
back to New Brunswick, which wasgoing to involve a trip across
(10:23):
the ferry.
You know there's a lot tohappen.
We've just had a baby, my wifejust had a C-section and now
we're going to travel and so,anyway, days go by, we're
enjoying time with our baby boy.
It's probably one of the bestseasons of my life, one of the
best, and we were so encouragedby that season.
And yet a few days go by and mywife starts to feel a little, a
(10:45):
little ill, a little sick,struggling a little bit.
She doesn't have a fever oranything, but she does feel you
know, not 100% there's somethinggoing on with the wound of her
c-section.
And so we went and talked to anurse practitioner and she said,
listen, I know you need totravel, you, you know, just sort
of be careful, and if there'smore that happens, or if you get
(11:06):
a fever, run to the ER rightaway.
And I said, okay, cool.
So we travel across the Bay ofFundy, we go back to New
Brunswick, we visit with familyand during that visit, actually
during the wedding, my wife islike green in the gills, she's
not well, she's pale, she's notlooking good.
So that doesn't look so good.
(11:27):
So we ended up actually leavingthe wedding after the ceremony
and we didn't even really stayfor most of the reception.
We drove down to St John and weended up going to the ER not
long after that and theyprescribed her some antibiotic
and sent her home.
Well, I'm gonna keep this longstory short because it is an
(11:47):
immensely long story, but inthat we started, we actually got
admitted, like my wife wasadmitted to the hospital.
So here, I got my baby, I gotmy wife.
We're in another province wherewe do not live anymore.
We have a lot of oldconnections that are around to
help us out, but we don't havelike our home to go back to and
(12:08):
our church family are confused,I'm sure, as to like where we're
at.
You know, I'm supposed to bedoing summer ministries, the
summer programs, summer events,you know VBS or uh, which is a
week long kids ministry thing, akids program.
I'm not able to do that.
So what's going on?
Well, my wife begins to getprogressively worse as the days
(12:29):
go by and instead of herrecovering in a few days which
is what kind of which was what Iexpected she ended up living in
a hospital for about a monthand in fact died in that
hospital and then wasresuscitated.
Sorry, plot twist there,spoiler alert.
So my wife survived, praise God.
But out of that experience wasthe loss of her ability to have
(12:54):
children.
So I'm going to skip ahead a bit, because I already mentioned
like God was putting it on ourhearts to have hope right, have
hope, hold on to hope and wasawesome.
But during that season, ofcourse, your hope is being put
to the test.
You're like whoa, like am Ireally going to keep trusting?
Um, but during that season, Ifelt very strongly that god was
calling me to rejoice and tostill maintain my joy in the
(13:16):
midst of what was going on withmy wife and a lot of the time
was spent with her was she wasspent, spent.
She spent most of her timeunconscious.
Okay, so what do you do?
Um?
But for me, I felt reallycalled upon by god to stay in an
atmosphere, stay in an attitudeof joy, stay grateful, keep
reminding the people that arepraying for us that things are
(13:36):
going really well.
Um, even though there wasn'tnot everything was going well,
but, like you know, especiallyas things started to progress,
we got, got clarity.
I would always send praisereports along with prayer
requests and there was just thisatmosphere of worship and
atmosphere of rejoicing becauseI really believe with all my
heart that God was going to healher even if she died, that God
(13:56):
was going to bring her back,which is kind of what happened.
But I'm not going to get toomuch into that, I want to skip
ahead.
So my wife lost her ability tohave any more children in the
natural.
So if you know anything aboutmy story, if you've watched the
intro to this podcast before,you've seen that I don't just
have one child, I have four kids.
So where the heck do they allcome from?
Well, my wife lost the abilityto have kids.
(14:18):
Months go by, okay, and sowe're still grieving, uh,
through this, I don't know thatI'm grieving, like I'm so out of
touch with grief, like I don'thave emotional awareness, you
know, I'm just angry all thetime, you know.
And so I'm struggling and likemany more months go by and a lot
(14:39):
of pain, a lot of distress, alot of difficulty, a lot of just
caring for my son, caring formy wife and working full time
and doing all this stuff allaround the clock.
So we come into the followingsummer.
By this point, we've made thedecision to return to New
Brunswick, and part of that isthat we were.
So I just paused recording thisbecause my son just like
(15:07):
started choking to death.
So it's not funny, but, um, I'mjust really grateful that I was
able to get up there in timebecause, uh, that was sketchy.
So clearly, you know, clearly,this is important somehow.
Maybe somebody really needs tosee this or hear it because, uh,
the enemy's against it somehow.
You know what I mean.
Like, if you've got a challengegoing on in your life, you've
(15:29):
got, if you got something goingon where you feel like you're
obeying the lord and somethingstarts happening where it's a
life or death situation or it'san accident or something's bad
just immediately begins to takeplace.
Never think of that as just a,a coinkydink.
Okay, it's not, it's definitelywarfare.
Um, it's not always warfare,you know, sometimes stuff just
(15:50):
happens.
But I mean, consider the contextthat you're in, right, um, so
my wife and I have, by thispoint, made the decision to
return back to New Brunswick andwe start living in the vicinity
of a pretty cool village and Istart to just love the place.
(16:13):
You know, we had said ourgoodbyes at the previous
ministry that we were part of.
We said goodbyes to the friendsthat we had made there and
everything.
So here we are, another newbeginning of, we said goodbyes
to the friends that we had madethere and everything.
So here we are, another newbeginning, and this time we're
carrying a whole lot of griefinto another season, um, into
another season.
And so here we are, bringingthis heaviness into this um,
(16:42):
into this new job.
And so I remember sitting downin my office in that new
environment and just feelingthat the Lord was guiding me to
talk about healing with them andprocess healing and I'm like
healing, sure, not sure why Ineed that Again, remember, I'm a
little slow when it comes tothis at that point and I just
(17:03):
start weeping because I'mcarrying a lot of pain into this
new season and I didn't realizeit, I didn't realize the need
that I had to heal and God wasmeeting me and he was rescuing
me in that season through thathealing.
And so that was the context ofstarting that.
Shortly afterward, covid-19started, guys, wow.
(17:27):
So COVID-19 happened and aroundthat time don't worry,
rejoicing in hope, being patientin affliction and being
faithful in prayer is coming uphere.
Okay, it's already been throughthe story if you're, you're
paying attention, but anyway, um, through this, there is a point
where, um, we have it on ourheart during during covid, like
(17:51):
middle of covid that we want toadopt children.
So we had had it on our heartsto adopt kids.
My wife and I spent struggling.
You know we're on the kitchenfloor weeping blah, blah, blah.
Where I am anyway, she's theretoo.
Weeping isn't exactly her modeof choice for expressing deep
grief, but it was for me.
(18:12):
So, shortly after this season oftransition, I'm praying and
asking God, like what's thestory?
What's the next step?
And I start getting this nameJackson, okay.
So Jackson starts coming up andI'm like, okay, what is that?
(18:32):
What does that mean?
Is that you?
It feels like.
Maybe I'm just imagining it,you know, maybe it's just me.
Anyway, I keep getting the nameJackson over and over and over
again and I'm like, okay,clearly something's coming up
here.
And the name, the word son andthe word Jackson kept coming up
over and over again.
So I told my wife.
I said, listen, here's what Ithink.
I think that God is going togive us a son, he's going to
(18:54):
give us another child and we'regoing to name that child Jackson
.
Or his name will be Jackson, orsomething.
His name is going to be Jacksonand or something.
His name is going to be jacksonand she said whatever, because
at this time in her life,obviously she's struggling, I'm
struggling.
She was basically under theimpression, like you know,
adoption is a really longprocess.
We might not be approved forthat.
We might not have our ducks ina row to do that.
(19:14):
So, yeah, let's not get ourhopes up too high, and so I
understand her perspective there, but I kept praying into it.
So another year goes by, okay.
So by the time this year goesby, okay, talk about.
Talk about being patient andaffliction.
Okay, at this point, we had, welived in a in a place.
We had a hard time selling ourhome in nova scotia.
(19:37):
We sold it, praise god, um, butwe hadn't sold it until the
following year, right.
So we had.
So it was covid, when we werehaving this prayer time or
whatever.
2020, we're in the middle of it,right, right in the thick of it
, into the thick of it, right.
And then a year goes by and bythat time, we're living with
friends.
We had moved from one place toanother, we still have our house
(19:59):
in nova scotia, we stillhaven't sold, paying a mortgage
on it, all this stuff, stuff.
So much time, waiting, waiting,waiting, waiting, waiting and
our family member reaches out.
So this is after, like having aphone call with the adoption
representative you know what I'msaying and having a call with
them and being like I want toadopt a baby and they're like,
(20:19):
kate, we'll call you in a decadeor so, feel free to call back
anytime, but it's not going tochange.
So I was like, okay, cool, Iguess we'll talk soon.
And so I just waited, and sothe waiting continued.
That was November 11th, actually, maybe it was November 10th,
(20:39):
actually November 10th of 2020that I called because I wanted
to see about having a having ababy.
So time went by, so a fewmonths goes by and they reach
out to us.
Uh, some family members reachout to my, my wife by this point
, they've already reached out tous before about another baby
and he got adopted by somebodyelse.
(21:00):
So gut punch there, great.
But it did awaken in us thisthing of like we want a baby man
, like there's a desire on ourheart to expand our family, even
though that makes no rationalsense whatsoever.
So we get a message again andthere's a.
There's a.
There's a message and it saysthere's two kids up for adoption
and the birth mom is pregnant,pregant, pregnant, okay, and the
(21:27):
child the oldest child is namedaxel.
The other child is namedjackson what?
But do you remember, though?
Like, come on, um, we have beengetting the name jackson for
like a year up to this point.
So here's this child namedjackson.
(21:48):
He's two years old, so, or he'sout here, he's about a year and
a half at this point, right?
So, okay, wrap your mind aroundthis one.
Okay, just bear with me.
So this child, in 2019, is bornthe same year that we had moved
and started pursuing healing,the same year that we had, you
(22:09):
know, been carrying all thisgrief, and you know, this child
is born.
I think, yeah, like it's kindof crazy to think that.
So what was this july?
So you know, july, august,september, october, november,
(22:30):
december, january, february,march, april, may.
So would have been like hewould have been like conceived
like nine months after my wifehad like suffered in the
hospital for a long time.
Uh, nine months after we camehome, nine months after my wife
had like suffered in thehospital for a long time, nine
months after we came home, ninemonths after all of that, like,
there's just this crazy thoughtof like a whoa God, like you
(22:52):
were brewing up this baby at thesame time that we were losing
our ability to have kids Boosh,you know, crazy.
And actually our oldest son.
So that child was named axel,his, his.
He was actually seven daysolder than my son, levi, my
first son.
(23:12):
So get your head around thatone.
So even before, like seven daysbefore, my son levi was born,
and the sequence of events wouldunfold that my wife would die
in the hospital in anotherprovince in fact, it's actually
in the same province that theywere born, in the same city that
they were born my wife wassuffering in this hospital.
Anyway, it's good.
It's a long story.
I can't get into all the details.
(23:33):
This is crazy.
How many ways that God movedand did something amazing, right
.
And so here I was that year2018, just processing like, ah,
like restoration, hope.
How do I hold on to hope?
How do I?
You know, and you know theadoption process, there's
struggles with it.
You know, at one point theycalled us and said I'm sorry to
(23:54):
tell you, but even though you'reapproved to adopt these kids
and everything, we're going todrop the plan.
And they called me on mybirthday.
Happy birthday.
You're not going gonna get thekids and I on the phone with
them, had to like, defend thefact that, like, these kids
being in our home is in theirbest interests in their best
(24:14):
interest, you know.
So y'all know how that's how itworks, bro.
So they're like, we know, we'llcall you later, I guess, maybe.
And I said, well, that's cool,that's a huge summation, like
that's a huge overoversimplification of what
happened.
But a few months later, theycall us up and they said, hey,
would you like a baby?
Um, I'm gonna circle back again.
(24:36):
So I'm gonna circle back tothat because, um, there's an
important point on that that Iwant to come back to in a moment
, but what I want to do rightnow is to just like highlight,
okay, oh my gosh, this is acrazy story and didn't take that
long to unfold.
I mean, like, if you thinkabout it, big picture, big
picture.
If you're thinking about a bigpicture, you're thinking about
three year period where my wifeis like, have it, like we have
(24:57):
our baby, awesome.
And then, um, my wife almostdies and does die, and then it
comes back to life, not awesome,awesome.
You know it's a mix, it's atension.
There's brutality in terms of,like, the traumas that we've
experienced, the spiritual stuffthat's happening while this is
all ongoing, right, in anongoing way, crazy.
And then you get to the pointwhere you know, now it's three
(25:21):
years later and my kids areabout to come into my life.
You know, now it's three yearslater, my kids are about to,
about to come into my life.
You know, whoa, like god, thankyou, you're amazing, praise the
lord um.
The part of the thing that Iwant you to remember in this is
like, hey, okay, like there's alot of ways that are super
imperfect, with the wholeholding on to hope thing, okay.
But, namely, I want you tothink about okay.
(25:43):
Earlier I said, like what someof the things have brought
expectation in a new beginningof yours.
Well, I want you now, I wantyou to think like what brought
me a sense of loss and griefbecause my expectations were
dashed.
You know what has dashed yourdreams, man, what has dashed
your joys?
You know, on like a tombstonein a cemetery, there's the year
(26:07):
a person was born okay, that'swhen they began, right.
And then there's on the otherside of the year that they died,
okay, and in the middle is adash right, it's a dash that
basically just outlines, likewhen a person died, like the
dash isn't unnecessary until thedeath happens.
So there's a birth year.
(26:27):
Sure, you wouldn't put atombstone somewhere just because
somebody got born.
You put a tombstone becausesomebody died, so you have the
year of their death and the dashis useless until then.
So they put the dash in thedeath year.
Sometimes they put the dash inbecause they're like I know this
is going to happen someday, sowe'll leave the dash there, but
we won't put the year of deathuntil they die.
(26:47):
Well, okay, what has dashed youbefore?
What has dashed your dreams?
What has been something thatthat god like set in your heart?
You had a desire in your heartand something just dashed those
dreams.
Man, put a dash and put a deathyear on that dream and put it
in the ground.
(27:07):
What's something that's dashedyour expectations?
Put a dash on your life, put adash on your dreams, your
desires.
You know the reason why I askthat is because and I mean pause
and think about that, what's up, and maybe maybe something
comes up right away.
You know, maybe something,maybe a mistake that you made
(27:27):
comes up, maybe it's somethingthat was completely out of your
control.
Well, regardless of what it isyou know, pause and process that
and consider is god working inthe dashing?
Is there a way that God isactually like somehow behind a
big plot to restore you?
(27:50):
Is there a way, maybe, that Godis actually looking to get into
the soil of your greatest lossand rip out from it a renewed
dream that's made completelyresurrected and restored?
Is there a way that God isabout to reclaim a dream that
you think is dying?
And the reason why I'm talkingabout dreams and all this is not
(28:10):
because having our deepestwishes fulfilled is the point.
But if you think about it, theBible tells us that eternity is
set in the hearts of man, right,and that God actually works in
you to act and desire with, inaccordance with his good
purposes.
That's in the book ofphilippians.
You know setting eternity inour hearts that's in the book of
(28:31):
ecclesiastes.
If you think about it, you know, if you fashion it, if you look
at it with the right angle,right, you can come to the
conclusion that god actually isin the business of giving you
your deepest desires, because heput them there and whether or
not you realize them right,meaning you don't know about
them or because somebody hasdecided not to put their faith
(28:53):
in Christ and they never havetheir deepest hearts, souls,
true desires realized.
Regardless, that doesn'tnecessarily mean that God hadn't
put them there right.
And at the end of the day, thegospel is about reclaiming you.
That's what the gospel is about, man, not about you
specifically, but, yes, youspecifically and all of us right
.
Like jesus died for us and thatwas on his heart.
(29:14):
That was his desire.
And along that process comesthe reclaiming of his sons and
daughters, so that his sons anddaughters having their deepest
desires realized, which arereally actually just his in
disguise.
His desires realized in yourlife, though they're in disguise
as your desires right, they arerealized by God coming in and
(29:35):
saving you, the gospelintegrating into your life.
Now I'm not talking about, oh mygosh, you're going to become a
multimillionaire, necessarily,maybe you will.
A lot of Christians actually dobecome-millionaires because
they're wise, you know, they'regood thinkers and they're good
and smart with their money.
And a lot of christians don'tbecome that because they, you
know, don't, maybe don't havethat skill set or whatever.
I'm not.
That's not the point.
(29:56):
The point is is there a desire,a dream on your life that's
going to impact other peoplethat God wants to see realized
in your life, and is there a waythat one that has been dashed
or it's on the way to beingdashed that he's trying to
reclaim it?
Earlier I said I paused therecording of this podcast
episode because I needed to goupstairs and save my child's
(30:16):
life.
I literally did because he waschoking on something right Dying
, and the irony is that it wasmy youngest son who was choking.
And the reason why I find thatinteresting is because my
youngest son whenever I thinkabout my youngest son, whose
name is Luca, which means light,I think about the word
(30:36):
restoration.
That's what comes to mind forme.
Is there somebody or somethingin your life that, when you
think about it, you know, makesyou think about restoration?
Because it is for me.
That is Luca for me.
So, rejoicing in hope, beingpatient in affliction and being
faithful in prayer, all cometogether in that all the
(30:58):
difficulties that you're facing,all the things that are trying
to dash your heart, your soul,your dreams, your everything,
even your being, your wholebeing all of that can actually
be used to actually advance andaccelerate God's desires for
your life.
And I want you to be challengedtoday with hope, because the
reality is that, no matter whatreality you're facing, there is
(31:20):
a hope in it and behind it.
If you're going to allow God todefine it for you, if you would
(31:41):
allow and not refuse it, godredefine it and reuse it.
Okay, so that's what he did forme and I know you can do the
same for you, but that doesn'tmean that everything that's
going to go your way.
I mean, quite frankly, I wasbroke for years.
God provided, but god, but Iwas broke.
I struggled with anger and grief.
(32:02):
I mean that affected myrelationships with, especially
my son and my wife too, butnamely my son at the time and my
grief and my anger continued tocarry into my life even after I
had all these kids come into myhome, you know, and there's a
lot of difficulties that camewith that too.
But this is where I want toland here, this is where I want
(32:22):
to start to finish and land thisplane.
Okay, let's talk aboutrestoration, right, like there's
a hope that comes to us throughJesus, because there's an
assurance of being restored,right?
So that's the whole idea.
Like what is God reusing yourdifficulties for at your
restoration?
It's a setup, you know.
It's a setup, because God isable to take the horrible things
(32:43):
that have happened to you andset them up to restore you.
So what does that have to dowith you know?
What does rejoicing and hopehave to do with that?
Well, in all the times where Ithought that God, that God was
not going to give me what I hadlonged for or whatever, that,
that that sense of a God givendream was being dashed and put
in the grave, there is a sensethat I was like I know that God
(33:06):
is faithful and there's a sensethat I'm kind of internalizing
this whole Jackson thing as himpromising me that it's going to
come about and that he hadalready put adoption on our
hearts.
The moment that the doctorstold me that your wife will
absolutely lose her ability tohave children, I also got a
sense from the doctors that shecould die.
But I mean, god did great withthat one too.
(33:27):
And that's not to say that thelosses that you have experienced
maybe you've lost your spouseirreconcilably, irrevocably lost
them, him or her.
Maybe you lost a child, maybesome situation with choking or
drowning, whatever it is thathappened.
Maybe your child was in a poolone day and he never got out or
(33:48):
she never got out.
That's brutal, that's deep,that's loss, and there has to be
a way to which you accept both.
You know I remember being inthe hospital and saying God, I
just consent for you to dowhatever you're going to do.
I know you're going to restoreme, because that's what your
word tells me is that you'regoing to restore me even if it
doesn't look like it now.
(34:08):
And I also said if my wife dies, I know you can bring her back,
but even if you don't, even ifyou don't, I will still trust
you.
Like, are you willing to acceptreality and accept a
restoration?
Are you allowing God to definethe situation?
Are you allowing God to havehis say on the subject?
(34:30):
Listen, whatever it is, whateverhappens, whatever has happened,
you have a reason to rejoice inhope, and the reason why is
because the things that you'relooking to happen, whether they
be vain wishes or somewhere deep, some precious hope for you or
something that is assured, anexpectation of God's goodness
(34:51):
for the future, you can alwaysrest on God's goodness and his
kindness.
You can always rest on hisassurance to do the best thing
in the future.
You can always rest on God'sgoodness and his kindness.
You can always rest on hisassurance to do the best thing
in the moment.
Because the fact is, eventhough we might wrestle with
trust issues with God and aninsecure attachment with him,
god tells us that he knows bestand he's working actively to
bring about the best for yoursituation.
Because you love him and you'recalled according to his purpose,
(35:13):
there's nothing that canseparate you from his love.
He can make you a conqueror inall those things that you're
dealing with.
That's what Romans 8 tells us.
There is no condemnation forthose who are in Christ Jesus
and for those who have put theirfaith in Christ.
Even the mistakes that we'vemade, even the things that were
in our control, we can put thedeath and move forward in a more
life-giving direction throughChrist, because we're sons and
(35:35):
daughters, because we've beengiven the spirit of sonship
instead of the spirit of fearthat we may again be slaves.
God has made us sons anddaughters through the spirit of
sonship, by whom we cry out,abba, father.
When we cry out, abba, father,we're acknowledging to the
Father that he is over it all.
You know who went upstairs andsaved a little kid's life today
His dad, me.
Now I want to acknowledge toothat as soon as that was over, I
(35:59):
was like Jesus, thank you.
Thank you, jesus, for saving myson.
Thank you, jesus for providingfor him.
Thank you, jesus for letting mebe in the right place at the
right time.
Thank you, jesus for what Itried to do, for bringing
effectiveness to that.
And it must feel kind of weird,like hear me talk about this
and like see me laughing orsomething, but like I'm just so
(36:20):
enjoy because my son is okay,you know, and um, but who did
that?
It was his father.
It was his dad, right.
And like my wife called out andsaid hey, I think Luca is
choking, come here, you know.
And so I ran upstairs and dealtwith it.
And the thing is like God isready to drop everything and
save your life.
God is ready to drop everythingand do what's absolutely the
best thing you know, and he'sgoing to do the absolute best
(36:41):
thing that he knows to do foryour life, just as I would as
dad.
I'm an earthly, I'm an earthlyman, broken, mistake making,
dude, okay, and I got fourchildren that depend on me to be
a dad and and that receive goodgifts from me.
And yet how much more does yourHeavenly Father love you and
(37:02):
have the intent to come in andrescue you and provide for you.
In the midst of what you'regoing through, there's nothing
that can separate you from yourFather's love for you, even the
mistakes you've made.
He's not looking to condemn you, bro, sister.
Okay, he's looking to help you.
He's looking to change you.
Okay, he's looking to help you.
He's looking to change you.
He's looking to restore you.
He's looking to rescue you andif you let him, he will redeem
(37:22):
and reuse every struggle, everyproblem, every loss to work out
and redound to his glory andyour goodness.
So I'm not sure where you're at.
I just want you to just beassured of the hope, though you
know I want you to have the hope.
Have hope, because hope is allyou've got sometimes.
Sometimes, whether you'recrying on the kitchen floor,
like I was one day, or you'reholding your baby boy in your
(37:46):
arms because God provided, oryou're holding your baby boy in
your arms because God didn't theway you wanted, hope is all
you've got, man.
Even the Bible tells us don'tmourn as those who have no hope.
Even in mourning we have hope.
That's in first thessalonians,chapter 5, by the way I'd
encourage you to read it becauseit talks about the future hope
(38:06):
of jesus returning.
Don't ever mourn your losses asif there is no hope, and not
because god is trying to come inand devalidate your feelings of
despair.
What he's trying to tell you isthat yo, in your feelings and
in your thought life that saysthere's no hope, here there is
hope, actually, there's hopeunder every rock, because no
matter where you're goingthrough, no matter what you're
(38:28):
dealing with, god is in controlin those things.
He's superintending the wholeprocess to work out for a
greater story, and if you'rewilling to let him, he'll use it
.
Anyway, process to work out fora greater story, and if you're
willing to let him, he'll use it.
Anyway.
I said that enough.
I want to circle back torestoration.
You know how could thissituation tend towards
restoration?
So I've already mentioned, okay, that my son, luca, reminds me
(38:49):
of restoration, and I want tocircle back to that because
there's stuff in your life thatif you were to look back on, you
could think, yeah, god is arestorer.
God gave me hope.
Then he can give me hope now.
God gave me provision.
Then he can give me provisionnow.
God helped me through thattransition.
He can help me through thissituation.
(39:10):
So, reflect on this too.
Reflect on this.
What is something that God hasdone in your life or shown you
in the word that reminds you ofhis restoration?
What's something that hearkensback to his restoration in your
life?
What is something that hearkensback to the presence of God
meeting you and hearkens back toa rescue?
(39:31):
What is something in your lifetoday, you know, like I've got
scars on my body that remind meof how good god is.
You know, I literally, um, Ihave, uh, I have, you know,
scars on me.
I've got my wife.
You know my wife carries thescars from her surgery and, even
though she doesn't like scarson her body, duh, um, you know,
(39:54):
it is a reminder that she's okay.
Uh, it's kind of interestingthat the scars that were made on
her body, like save her life,uh, created an anchor on her
belly.
An anchor and anchor, of course,is, you know, symbolic of hope.
Like jesus is our forerunner,he goes behind the curtain, he
holds on to hope for us and, um,this hope is an anchor for the
(40:15):
soul and you know you need thatsometimes.
Sometimes you need that hope.
You need that hope to anchoryou and harbor you.
Is there something in your liferight now that you look around
and you think that's an anchorfor me, that's an encouragement,
that little drawing that mychild did when they were seven
years old, before this accident,blah, blah, blah.
That reminds me of God's love,that reminds me of God's
(40:36):
goodness, that reminds me ofGod's goodness.
This reminds me, you know, andI mean maybe for you it's like
your child's wheelchair orsomething that like they had a
horrible accident, somethingterrible happened, maybe they
had a stroke or whatever it is.
And when you look at thatwheelchair you think if it
hadn't been for God providing mychild would not even be here at
all, and that wheelchair is nowcarrying them into every area
(40:59):
that they end up being in.
You know this is a reminder forme and now for some of you you
might think about it as a chainor something as a burden to
carry or whatever.
But, like I want to remind youthat what you're left with after
a season of loss can be whatlifts you up through a different
season of loss.
(41:20):
Wrap your head around that one.
What you are left with after aseason of loss can be the very
thing that lifts you in anotherseason of loss.
So you know, for me, what wewere left with was the scars
(41:47):
from my wife's surgery, and wewere left with the inability to
have kids.
We were left with all kinds ofthings, and yet God used those
exact things to lift us up laterwhen, three years to the day
(42:09):
that my wife was admitted to thehospital, three years to the
day that my wife was admitted tothe maternity floor, because
they didn't really know where toput her, so they just put her
in the maternity floor becausethere were other babies there
and so we had her baby with usat the time.
So they're like, okay, fine, um, so they put her in the
maternity floor on the exactsame maternity floor come, on
(42:30):
the exact same floor my wife wasadmitted to three years ago.
Three, three years to that day,three years later, my son Luca
was born.
My son Luca was born on July1st 2021.
My wife told me about somethingthat she had seen her
(42:55):
grandfather, her deadgrandfather, in the corner of
the room around that same timeof night, that same day, three
years before.
And she went into her surgeryJuly 2nd in the morning I think
it was like seven or eight inthe morning she went into her
surgery.
Maybe it was nine, doesn'tmatter.
So she went into her surgeryJuly 2nd 2018.
(43:17):
July 1st, canada Day.
She was telling me that she wasgoing to.
She was like, she was basicallyindicating to me I'm dying, you
know.
And then, three years to theday, that same hospital floor,
we have our baby boy born to us,because the department called
us and said, yo, you still wanta baby.
And we're like, yes, and youknow, it was like maybe a week
(43:41):
and a half, two weeks, and wehad a baby, had a baby, had a
baby boy and, um, the uh, thepajamas that my baby boy were
wearing, my boy was wearing, um,after he had, you know, gotten
cleaned up and all this stuff,like we were in the room, we
were in the room for the birthof our, of our youngest son,
(44:03):
what like.
Anyway, it was crazy.
And he came home with us likedays later.
He had to go on a little boogieboard, you know, for the uv
thing, and then he came with uslater that week.
God is faithful.
God can bring restoration outof any situation.
(44:23):
If you allow him, if you, uh,if you allow god and not refuse
it, he can redefine and reuse itwhatever it is, he'll help you.
So I want to pray for you andsay goodbye, father.
I pray for the person listeningtoday that they would be
transformed by hope, that theirmind and even the pathways in
(44:46):
their mind would redefine forthem what they're going through
in their life, that they wouldexperience the difficulties as a
sign that you're faithful, asign that you're up to something
, and they would see behindevery sign the indication that
(45:07):
you're with them in theirsituation for their restoration.
Amen, yeah, whoa, listen, thisis great.
I want you to pray this with me.
Okay, I have never done thisbefore.
I think maybe a couple times.
Repeat this after me if youwant to allow God to reuse your
situations.
Dear Jesus, come into my heartafresh, holy Spirit, invade my
(45:31):
life afresh, life afresh.
Father, set your love in myheart afresh.
Save me, rescue me here,forgive me of my sins and
(45:52):
restore me.
Use it whatever it is.
You can think about that rightnow.
You're thinking about thesituation you're going through.
Use it In Jesus' name.
Amen.
Oh my gosh, thank you so much.
I went so much deeper into thatstory than I was planning on
doing, but I think it was for agood reason, good purpose.
May you be blessed.
This is NREST.
Would love to see you connectwith us on Instagram @inrest.
(46:13):
insta.
We've got Spotify.
Okay, if you're watching thison YouTube, check it rest dot
insta.
We've got Spotify.
And if you are watching this onYouTube, subscribe to this
channel.
Okay, right, or somewhere.
Subscribe to it and like thisvideo and share it with somebody
that you think needs it.
Maybe it's somebody's goingthrough a health problem, maybe
somebody's going throughfertility issues and they're
struggling.
Hey, send it, send the story,send this podcast episode,
(46:34):
because this is probably themost in-depth I've ever gotten
on my story, I think, in apodcast episode in my life so
far.
So you know, use it, don't loseit.
Reuse it, you know, rocky, okay, that's a Paw Patrol reference,
by the way.
Anyway, jesus loves you, so doI?
Check out and rest, okay, bye.
Hello and welcome to the In Rest Podcast
with Noah James Wiebe.
I am your host, oah, and todaywe are going to be talking about
hope.
So hope we've talked about itbefore.
We're talking about it againbecause we are jumping into a
series on hope.
I got some amazing guests aheadfor you this fall and I'm so
(00:25):
excited to interview them andget that going.
However, today we're going tobe talking about hope.
You can probably hear all of mykids talking in the background,
so we're going to actually talkabout a snippet of my story,
and especially as that storypertains to having my kids come
into my life.
(00:45):
The Bible tells us in Romans 12,verse 12, "'rejoice in hope, be
patient in affliction, "'befaithful in prayer'".
Be joyful in hope, be patientin affliction, be faithful in
prayer Romans 12, verse 12.
As we're gonna jump in, what Iwant to do is actually want us
(01:07):
to pray.
Maybe you've been strugglingwith hope lately, maybe there's
a reason why you turned on thisparticular podcast episode today
, and so I want to pray for us.
Lord Jesus, I thank you fortoday.
I thank you for the kindnessthat you have for us, the love
that you have for us.
Help me and help my listenertoday to rest in your
(01:31):
graciousness and in yourkindness.
I pray, god, that you wouldhelp us to rest in the goodness
that you have for us and thekindness that you have for us.
God, I thank you that yourkindness does not depend on our
perfect performance, but ratherupon your perfect love for us.
So I just pray that whoever'slistening or watching today
(01:52):
would be the exact right peoplethat need to be hearing this
today.
The right person.
Even if it's just one personthat needed to hear it today, I
pray that that would be theperson that's hearing and
listening today to the In Restpodcast, and so I just pray that
you would bless this episode,that you bless this time.
I just invite you into thisspace, no matter how long it
might take probably going to bea short time but I pray you
bless it either way, in Jesusname, amen.
(02:14):
Okay, so yeah, here we goRejoice in hope or be joyful in
hope, be patient in affliction,be faithful in prayer.
Long while ago, my wife and I,we were really excited to have
our first son, so our first son,who later would be named Levi.
He did not come to us untilabout three years into our
(02:35):
marriage.
So I was married, probably, youknow, a year after I graduated
from high school, so I was only19 years old when I got married.
That story brought me throughuniversity, or most of my
university days in Bible college, up to the point where I was
about to graduate.
So that particular summer I'ddone a lot of work to prepare in
order to leave university, toleave the apartment that we had
(02:58):
stayed in, to leave behindeverything in that season, and
we just felt this sense from theLord that it was time to have a
baby.
We had prayed about havingchildren in the past and now,
after three years of us beingmarried, there is just, there is
a clear sense Now is the time,now is the now is the time to to
, you know, to have a baby.
(03:18):
And so we stopped not tryingand eventually my wife conceived
and we were able to have, uh,have, a pregnancy, and it was a
beautiful pregnancy.
It was like a blessing to mywife.
My wife struggles with chronicpain, so to be able to have her
experience a season where thatpain actually subsided a bit
(03:39):
during her pregnancy, which waskind of surprising, um, and she
was probably at the peak herpeak health as an adult.
Up to that point.
It was just a blessing to havea healthy pregnancy, to be
blessed in that way, and we werereally encouraged by that.
So, of course, you know, ninemonths goes by by the time we
have come to the hospital tohave our baby.
(04:01):
We had moved to another province, moved into a brand new house,
or I shouldn't say brand new.
We had moved to anotherprovince, moved into a brand new
house, or I shouldn't say brandnew.
It was new to us.
It was a old house, it was like111 years old, and we moved
there.
We had, you know, renovated theplace a little bit, sort of to
get it to the capacity that itneeded to be, so that we could
have our baby, have our family.
(04:22):
We had started a new job.
I had started a new job as achildren and family pastor,
children and youth pastor, andit was a beautiful season for us
, that season of change,especially as we were coming out
of our first province, you know, new Brunswick, into our new
province of serving in NovaScotia.
(04:43):
There was a season of changewhere, in the difficulty of the
change, there was sadness anddepression.
Oftentimes the difficulty of achange is not so much of the
change itself.
It's just, it's the difficultyof depression in the midst of
the change, and part of thereason why that happens is
because there's a there's a lossthat happens to us when we let
(05:05):
go of a particular season andmove into a new one.
There is a sense of loss thathappens when we step away from
relationships that we arefamiliar with, that we have to
now have a season of distance.
There is loss and grief thathappens when we say goodbye to
things that we really cherished,about one season moving into
(05:26):
another.
We're in a similar season now,actually, of moving into a
season of change and transition.
We're saying goodbye to thishouse that we've been living in
and this season of life and ourchildren being babies.
You know, like our, ouryoungest son.
He is three years old now,which means that there's not
many little boy days left.
(05:47):
You know like soon he's goingto be, he's going to be a big
boy.
You know he's going to grow up,he's going to go to school, and
that's sad.
There's sadness that comes with, you know, letting go of those
younger days of your child'slife.
And so we're in a season nowagain of change and transition.
During that season back then,which was years ago, that was
(06:07):
something that really wasjarring to me.
I did not expect to experiencedepression in the midst of
change, and around that time Igot a book from my friend, don,
who was a mentor to me.
He was a pastor to me, he hadapprenticed me in ministry to
help me grow into the pastorthat I am and the man that I am
today, and he left me with abook called All Things New, and
(06:28):
I had it here in the officesomewhere, and basically the
premise of the book is that ourhope as Christians is found in
the love of God and in thefuture that he has for his
people, which is assured, andthat future is characterized by
the renewing of all things.
Everything you love about thisworld that has been destroyed,
(06:52):
everything that God has lovedabout what he has made that has
been lost, is going to bereclaimed and restored.
And when Jesus comes again,he's going to renew all things.
He's going to bring the renewalof all things, the perigenesis
or the perigenesis genesis,again, again, genesis right,
again, beginning.
And so there's a sense of a newbeginning and new seasons that
(07:12):
we have where, you know, we havea sense of experience of
something new being made or anew beginning, and that's that
new beginning is what God istelling us to root our hope in.
So, in the midst of that newbeginning that was stressful and
difficult, god was reminding meof the hope of a new beginning
to come.
That would be an ultimate newbeginning, that would be a
(07:35):
complete restoration of allthings.
And when I was asking God aboutthe word of the year okay, what
, what do you go?
Well, god, what do you want meto focus on?
What are some of the things, aswe come into this new season,
that you want me to process?
It was hope, you know.
Hope in the thing that I haveahead for you, hope in the thing
that is to come, therestoration of all things,
(07:55):
regardless of what happens next.
Hope, you know.
And so obviously, there was alot of hope for that new
beginning, because beautifulthings were happening and, in
fact, we were living in probablyone of the most beautiful
places in the world and I knowthat sounds like a hyperbole, it
sounds a little over the top,but it really was and really is
one of the most beautiful placesin the world from my
(08:16):
perspective.
And so that season, by the timewe got to me graduating from
university, us taking on thisnew job, all these things, all
this happening all around thesame time that my baby is about
to be born.
New beginnings, right, hope forthe future.
Good things are coming likehope, hope, hope, hope.
I'm not sure about you.
(08:38):
I want you to pause on this andmaybe and reflect on it.
But, like, what are some of thethings in this new season maybe
that you're coming to, or aseason in the past that was new?
What are some of the thingsthat gave you a sense of
expectation?
Because that's what hope isreally about.
It's not really about.
Hope is not about having a vainwish for something that is like
a hope, a kind of hope, but whatI'm talking about is an assured
(08:59):
sense of expectation, right?
So when God's word tells us torejoice in hope or be joyful in
hope, what he's saying is not tobe happy about some sort of
vain wish.
Rather, he's talking aboutsomething that's assured, right?
Um paul says earlier on in thatsame letter to the book, uh, to
the to the church in rome, hesays in romans, chapter 5 hope
(09:20):
does not put us to shame,because the love of god has been
poured into our hearts by theHoly Spirit or through the Holy
Spirit, and so you know, thishope that he's talking about is
something that is like a bedrockkind of hope, and it's an
expectation.
So what are some of the thingsthat brought a sense of
expectation for you in that oldseason?
I want you to hold that in mindas I talk about the rest of
(09:41):
this, because a lot of thethings that I expected to happen
did not.
A lot of the things that Iexpected to happen were
completely changed and upsidedown, and when my son was
finally born, he really was likeperfect, like I mean as perfect
as a little baby boy could be.
My wife's pregnancy ended alittle differently than we had
(10:02):
planned on, because she had tohave an emergency C-section.
She had to have a differentrecovery time that we had
planned on, and so there'sdifferences there.
There's also a difference inthe terms of, like the timing of
how things worked out.
We had a wedding to attend, afamily member's wedding.
My brother's wedding was comingup, and so we were going to go
back to New Brunswick, which wasgoing to involve a trip across
(10:23):
the ferry.
You know there's a lot tohappen.
We've just had a baby, my wifejust had a C-section and now
we're going to travel and so,anyway, days go by, we're
enjoying time with our baby boy.
It's probably one of the bestseasons of my life, one of the
best, and we were so encouragedby that season.
And yet a few days go by and mywife starts to feel a little, a
(10:45):
little ill, a little sick,struggling a little bit.
She doesn't have a fever oranything, but she does feel you
know, not 100% there's somethinggoing on with the wound of her
c-section.
And so we went and talked to anurse practitioner and she said,
listen, I know you need totravel, you, you know, just sort
of be careful, and if there'smore that happens, or if you get
(11:06):
a fever, run to the ER rightaway.
And I said, okay, cool.
So we travel across the Bay ofFundy, we go back to New
Brunswick, we visit with familyand during that visit, actually
during the wedding, my wife islike green in the gills, she's
not well, she's pale, she's notlooking good.
So that doesn't look so good.
(11:27):
So we ended up actually leavingthe wedding after the ceremony
and we didn't even really stayfor most of the reception.
We drove down to St John and weended up going to the ER not
long after that and theyprescribed her some antibiotic
and sent her home.
Well, I'm gonna keep this longstory short because it is an
(11:47):
immensely long story, but inthat we started, we actually got
admitted, like my wife wasadmitted to the hospital.
So here, I got my baby, I gotmy wife.
We're in another province wherewe do not live anymore.
We have a lot of oldconnections that are around to
help us out, but we don't havelike our home to go back to and
(12:08):
our church family are confused,I'm sure, as to like where we're
at.
You know, I'm supposed to bedoing summer ministries, the
summer programs, summer events,you know VBS or uh, which is a
week long kids ministry thing, akids program.
I'm not able to do that.
So what's going on?
Well, my wife begins to getprogressively worse as the days
(12:29):
go by and instead of herrecovering in a few days which
is what kind of which was what Iexpected she ended up living in
a hospital for about a monthand in fact died in that
hospital and then wasresuscitated.
Sorry, plot twist there,spoiler alert.
So my wife survived, praise God.
But out of that experience wasthe loss of her ability to have
(12:54):
children.
So I'm going to skip ahead a bit, because I already mentioned
like God was putting it on ourhearts to have hope right, have
hope, hold on to hope and wasawesome.
But during that season, ofcourse, your hope is being put
to the test.
You're like whoa, like am Ireally going to keep trusting?
Um, but during that season, Ifelt very strongly that god was
calling me to rejoice and tostill maintain my joy in the
(13:16):
midst of what was going on withmy wife and a lot of the time
was spent with her was she wasspent, spent.
She spent most of her timeunconscious.
Okay, so what do you do?
Um?
But for me, I felt reallycalled upon by god to stay in an
atmosphere, stay in an attitudeof joy, stay grateful, keep
reminding the people that arepraying for us that things are
(13:36):
going really well.
Um, even though there wasn'tnot everything was going well,
but, like you know, especiallyas things started to progress,
we got, got clarity.
I would always send praisereports along with prayer
requests and there was just thisatmosphere of worship and
atmosphere of rejoicing becauseI really believe with all my
heart that God was going to healher even if she died, that God
(13:56):
was going to bring her back,which is kind of what happened.
But I'm not going to get toomuch into that, I want to skip
ahead.
So my wife lost her ability tohave any more children in the
natural.
So if you know anything aboutmy story, if you've watched the
intro to this podcast before,you've seen that I don't just
have one child, I have four kids.
So where the heck do they allcome from?
Well, my wife lost the abilityto have kids.
(14:18):
Months go by, okay, and sowe're still grieving, uh,
through this, I don't know thatI'm grieving, like I'm so out of
touch with grief, like I don'thave emotional awareness, you
know, I'm just angry all thetime, you know.
And so I'm struggling and likemany more months go by and a lot
(14:39):
of pain, a lot of distress, alot of difficulty, a lot of just
caring for my son, caring formy wife and working full time
and doing all this stuff allaround the clock.
So we come into the followingsummer.
By this point, we've made thedecision to return to New
Brunswick, and part of that isthat we were.
So I just paused recording thisbecause my son just like
(15:07):
started choking to death.
So it's not funny, but, um, I'mjust really grateful that I was
able to get up there in timebecause, uh, that was sketchy.
So clearly, you know, clearly,this is important somehow.
Maybe somebody really needs tosee this or hear it because, uh,
the enemy's against it somehow.
You know what I mean.
Like, if you've got a challengegoing on in your life, you've
(15:29):
got, if you got something goingon where you feel like you're
obeying the lord and somethingstarts happening where it's a
life or death situation or it'san accident or something's bad
just immediately begins to takeplace.
Never think of that as just a,a coinkydink.
Okay, it's not, it's definitelywarfare.
Um, it's not always warfare,you know, sometimes stuff just
(15:50):
happens.
But I mean, consider the contextthat you're in, right, um, so
my wife and I have, by thispoint, made the decision to
return back to New Brunswick andwe start living in the vicinity
of a pretty cool village and Istart to just love the place.
(16:13):
You know, we had said ourgoodbyes at the previous
ministry that we were part of.
We said goodbyes to the friendsthat we had made there and
everything.
So here we are, another newbeginning of, we said goodbyes
to the friends that we had madethere and everything.
So here we are, another newbeginning, and this time we're
carrying a whole lot of griefinto another season, um, into
another season.
And so here we are, bringingthis heaviness into this um,
(16:42):
into this new job.
And so I remember sitting downin my office in that new
environment and just feelingthat the Lord was guiding me to
talk about healing with them andprocess healing and I'm like
healing, sure, not sure why Ineed that Again, remember, I'm a
little slow when it comes tothis at that point and I just
(17:03):
start weeping because I'mcarrying a lot of pain into this
new season and I didn't realizeit, I didn't realize the need
that I had to heal and God wasmeeting me and he was rescuing
me in that season through thathealing.
And so that was the context ofstarting that.
Shortly afterward, covid-19started, guys, wow.
(17:27):
So COVID-19 happened and aroundthat time don't worry,
rejoicing in hope, being patientin affliction and being
faithful in prayer is coming uphere.
Okay, it's already been throughthe story if you're, you're
paying attention, but anyway, um, through this, there is a point
where, um, we have it on ourheart during during covid, like
(17:51):
middle of covid that we want toadopt children.
So we had had it on our heartsto adopt kids.
My wife and I spent struggling.
You know we're on the kitchenfloor weeping blah, blah, blah.
Where I am anyway, she's theretoo.
Weeping isn't exactly her modeof choice for expressing deep
grief, but it was for me.
(18:12):
So, shortly after this season oftransition, I'm praying and
asking God, like what's thestory?
What's the next step?
And I start getting this nameJackson, okay.
So Jackson starts coming up andI'm like, okay, what is that?
(18:32):
What does that mean?
Is that you?
It feels like.
Maybe I'm just imagining it,you know, maybe it's just me.
Anyway, I keep getting the nameJackson over and over and over
again and I'm like, okay,clearly something's coming up
here.
And the name, the word son andthe word Jackson kept coming up
over and over again.
So I told my wife.
I said, listen, here's what Ithink.
I think that God is going togive us a son, he's going to
(18:54):
give us another child and we'regoing to name that child Jackson
.
Or his name will be Jackson, orsomething.
His name is going to be Jacksonand or something.
His name is going to be jacksonand she said whatever, because
at this time in her life,obviously she's struggling, I'm
struggling.
She was basically under theimpression, like you know,
adoption is a really longprocess.
We might not be approved forthat.
We might not have our ducks ina row to do that.
(19:14):
So, yeah, let's not get ourhopes up too high, and so I
understand her perspective there, but I kept praying into it.
So another year goes by, okay.
So by the time this year goesby, okay, talk about.
Talk about being patient andaffliction.
Okay, at this point, we had, welived in a in a place.
We had a hard time selling ourhome in nova scotia.
(19:37):
We sold it, praise god, um, butwe hadn't sold it until the
following year, right.
So we had.
So it was covid, when we werehaving this prayer time or
whatever.
2020, we're in the middle of it,right, right in the thick of it
, into the thick of it, right.
And then a year goes by and bythat time, we're living with
friends.
We had moved from one place toanother, we still have our house
(19:59):
in nova scotia, we stillhaven't sold, paying a mortgage
on it, all this stuff, stuff.
So much time, waiting, waiting,waiting, waiting, waiting and
our family member reaches out.
So this is after, like having aphone call with the adoption
representative you know what I'msaying and having a call with
them and being like I want toadopt a baby and they're like,
(20:19):
kate, we'll call you in a decadeor so, feel free to call back
anytime, but it's not going tochange.
So I was like, okay, cool, Iguess we'll talk soon.
And so I just waited, and sothe waiting continued.
That was November 11th, actually, maybe it was November 10th,
(20:39):
actually November 10th of 2020that I called because I wanted
to see about having a having ababy.
So time went by, so a fewmonths goes by and they reach
out to us.
Uh, some family members reachout to my, my wife by this point
, they've already reached out tous before about another baby
and he got adopted by somebodyelse.
(21:00):
So gut punch there, great.
But it did awaken in us thisthing of like we want a baby man
, like there's a desire on ourheart to expand our family, even
though that makes no rationalsense whatsoever.
So we get a message again andthere's a.
There's a.
There's a message and it saysthere's two kids up for adoption
and the birth mom is pregnant,pregant, pregnant, okay, and the
(21:27):
child the oldest child is namedaxel.
The other child is namedjackson what?
But do you remember, though?
Like, come on, um, we have beengetting the name jackson for
like a year up to this point.
So here's this child namedjackson.
(21:48):
He's two years old, so, or he'sout here, he's about a year and
a half at this point, right?
So, okay, wrap your mind aroundthis one.
Okay, just bear with me.
So this child, in 2019, is bornthe same year that we had moved
and started pursuing healing,the same year that we had, you
(22:09):
know, been carrying all thisgrief, and you know, this child
is born.
I think, yeah, like it's kindof crazy to think that.
So what was this july?
So you know, july, august,september, october, november,
(22:30):
december, january, february,march, april, may.
So would have been like hewould have been like conceived
like nine months after my wifehad like suffered in the
hospital for a long time.
Uh, nine months after we camehome, nine months after my wife
had like suffered in thehospital for a long time, nine
months after we came home, ninemonths after all of that, like,
there's just this crazy thoughtof like a whoa God, like you
(22:52):
were brewing up this baby at thesame time that we were losing
our ability to have kids Boosh,you know, crazy.
And actually our oldest son.
So that child was named axel,his, his.
He was actually seven daysolder than my son, levi, my
first son.
(23:12):
So get your head around thatone.
So even before, like seven daysbefore, my son levi was born,
and the sequence of events wouldunfold that my wife would die
in the hospital in anotherprovince in fact, it's actually
in the same province that theywere born, in the same city that
they were born my wife wassuffering in this hospital.
Anyway, it's good.
It's a long story.
I can't get into all the details.
(23:33):
This is crazy.
How many ways that God movedand did something amazing, right
.
And so here I was that year2018, just processing like, ah,
like restoration, hope.
How do I hold on to hope?
How do I?
You know, and you know theadoption process, there's
struggles with it.
You know, at one point theycalled us and said I'm sorry to
(23:54):
tell you, but even though you'reapproved to adopt these kids
and everything, we're going todrop the plan.
And they called me on mybirthday.
Happy birthday.
You're not going gonna get thekids and I on the phone with
them, had to like, defend thefact that, like, these kids
being in our home is in theirbest interests in their best
(24:14):
interest, you know.
So y'all know how that's how itworks, bro.
So they're like, we know, we'llcall you later, I guess, maybe.
And I said, well, that's cool,that's a huge summation, like
that's a huge overoversimplification of what
happened.
But a few months later, theycall us up and they said, hey,
would you like a baby?
Um, I'm gonna circle back again.
(24:36):
So I'm gonna circle back tothat because, um, there's an
important point on that that Iwant to come back to in a moment
, but what I want to do rightnow is to just like highlight,
okay, oh my gosh, this is acrazy story and didn't take that
long to unfold.
I mean, like, if you thinkabout it, big picture, big
picture.
If you're thinking about a bigpicture, you're thinking about
three year period where my wifeis like, have it, like we have
(24:57):
our baby, awesome.
And then, um, my wife almostdies and does die, and then it
comes back to life, not awesome,awesome.
You know it's a mix, it's atension.
There's brutality in terms of,like, the traumas that we've
experienced, the spiritual stuffthat's happening while this is
all ongoing, right, in anongoing way, crazy.
And then you get to the pointwhere you know, now it's three
(25:21):
years later and my kids areabout to come into my life.
You know, now it's three yearslater, my kids are about to,
about to come into my life.
You know, whoa, like god, thankyou, you're amazing, praise the
lord um.
The part of the thing that Iwant you to remember in this is
like, hey, okay, like there's alot of ways that are super
imperfect, with the wholeholding on to hope thing, okay.
But, namely, I want you tothink about okay.
(25:43):
Earlier I said, like what someof the things have brought
expectation in a new beginningof yours.
Well, I want you now, I wantyou to think like what brought
me a sense of loss and griefbecause my expectations were
dashed.
You know what has dashed yourdreams, man, what has dashed
your joys?
You know, on like a tombstonein a cemetery, there's the year
(26:07):
a person was born okay, that'swhen they began, right.
And then there's on the otherside of the year that they died,
okay, and in the middle is adash right, it's a dash that
basically just outlines, likewhen a person died, like the
dash isn't unnecessary until thedeath happens.
So there's a birth year.
(26:27):
Sure, you wouldn't put atombstone somewhere just because
somebody got born.
You put a tombstone becausesomebody died, so you have the
year of their death and the dashis useless until then.
So they put the dash in thedeath year.
Sometimes they put the dash inbecause they're like I know this
is going to happen someday, sowe'll leave the dash there, but
we won't put the year of deathuntil they die.
(26:47):
Well, okay, what has dashed youbefore?
What has dashed your dreams?
What has been something thatthat god like set in your heart?
You had a desire in your heartand something just dashed those
dreams.
Man, put a dash and put a deathyear on that dream and put it
in the ground.
(27:07):
What's something that's dashedyour expectations?
Put a dash on your life, put adash on your dreams, your
desires.
You know the reason why I askthat is because and I mean pause
and think about that, what's up, and maybe maybe something
comes up right away.
You know, maybe something,maybe a mistake that you made
(27:27):
comes up, maybe it's somethingthat was completely out of your
control.
Well, regardless of what it isyou know, pause and process that
and consider is god working inthe dashing?
Is there a way that God isactually like somehow behind a
big plot to restore you?
(27:50):
Is there a way, maybe, that Godis actually looking to get into
the soil of your greatest lossand rip out from it a renewed
dream that's made completelyresurrected and restored?
Is there a way that God isabout to reclaim a dream that
you think is dying?
And the reason why I'm talkingabout dreams and all this is not
(28:10):
because having our deepestwishes fulfilled is the point.
But if you think about it, theBible tells us that eternity is
set in the hearts of man, right,and that God actually works in
you to act and desire with, inaccordance with his good
purposes.
That's in the book ofphilippians.
You know setting eternity inour hearts that's in the book of
(28:31):
ecclesiastes.
If you think about it, you know, if you fashion it, if you look
at it with the right angle,right, you can come to the
conclusion that god actually isin the business of giving you
your deepest desires, because heput them there and whether or
not you realize them right,meaning you don't know about
them or because somebody hasdecided not to put their faith
(28:53):
in Christ and they never havetheir deepest hearts, souls,
true desires realized.
Regardless, that doesn'tnecessarily mean that God hadn't
put them there right.
And at the end of the day, thegospel is about reclaiming you.
That's what the gospel is about, man, not about you
specifically, but, yes, youspecifically and all of us right
.
Like jesus died for us and thatwas on his heart.
(29:14):
That was his desire.
And along that process comesthe reclaiming of his sons and
daughters, so that his sons anddaughters having their deepest
desires realized, which arereally actually just his in
disguise.
His desires realized in yourlife, though they're in disguise
as your desires right, they arerealized by God coming in and
(29:35):
saving you, the gospelintegrating into your life.
Now I'm not talking about, oh mygosh, you're going to become a
multimillionaire, necessarily,maybe you will.
A lot of Christians actually dobecome-millionaires because
they're wise, you know, they'regood thinkers and they're good
and smart with their money.
And a lot of christians don'tbecome that because they, you
know, don't, maybe don't havethat skill set or whatever.
I'm not.
That's not the point.
(29:56):
The point is is there a desire,a dream on your life that's
going to impact other peoplethat God wants to see realized
in your life, and is there a waythat one that has been dashed
or it's on the way to beingdashed that he's trying to
reclaim it?
Earlier I said I paused therecording of this podcast
episode because I needed to goupstairs and save my child's
(30:16):
life.
I literally did because he waschoking on something right Dying
, and the irony is that it wasmy youngest son who was choking.
And the reason why I find thatinteresting is because my
youngest son whenever I thinkabout my youngest son, whose
name is Luca, which means light,I think about the word
(30:36):
restoration.
That's what comes to mind forme.
Is there somebody or somethingin your life that, when you
think about it, you know, makesyou think about restoration?
Because it is for me.
That is Luca for me.
So, rejoicing in hope, beingpatient in affliction and being
faithful in prayer, all cometogether in that all the
(30:58):
difficulties that you're facing,all the things that are trying
to dash your heart, your soul,your dreams, your everything,
even your being, your wholebeing all of that can actually
be used to actually advance andaccelerate God's desires for
your life.
And I want you to be challengedtoday with hope, because the
reality is that, no matter whatreality you're facing, there is
(31:20):
a hope in it and behind it.
If you're going to allow God todefine it for you, if you would
(31:41):
allow and not refuse it, godredefine it and reuse it.
Okay, so that's what he did forme and I know you can do the
same for you, but that doesn'tmean that everything that's
going to go your way.
I mean, quite frankly, I wasbroke for years.
God provided, but god, but Iwas broke.
I struggled with anger and grief.
(32:02):
I mean that affected myrelationships with, especially
my son and my wife too, butnamely my son at the time and my
grief and my anger continued tocarry into my life even after I
had all these kids come into myhome, you know, and there's a
lot of difficulties that camewith that too.
But this is where I want toland here, this is where I want
(32:22):
to start to finish and land thisplane.
Okay, let's talk aboutrestoration, right, like there's
a hope that comes to us throughJesus, because there's an
assurance of being restored,right?
So that's the whole idea.
Like what is God reusing yourdifficulties for at your
restoration?
It's a setup, you know.
It's a setup, because God isable to take the horrible things
(32:43):
that have happened to you andset them up to restore you.
So what does that have to dowith you know?
What does rejoicing and hopehave to do with that?
Well, in all the times where Ithought that God, that God was
not going to give me what I hadlonged for or whatever, that,
that that sense of a God givendream was being dashed and put
in the grave, there is a sensethat I was like I know that God
(33:06):
is faithful and there's a sensethat I'm kind of internalizing
this whole Jackson thing as himpromising me that it's going to
come about and that he hadalready put adoption on our
hearts.
The moment that the doctorstold me that your wife will
absolutely lose her ability tohave children, I also got a
sense from the doctors that shecould die.
But I mean, god did great withthat one too.
(33:27):
And that's not to say that thelosses that you have experienced
maybe you've lost your spouseirreconcilably, irrevocably lost
them, him or her.
Maybe you lost a child, maybesome situation with choking or
drowning, whatever it is thathappened.
Maybe your child was in a poolone day and he never got out or
(33:48):
she never got out.
That's brutal, that's deep,that's loss, and there has to be
a way to which you accept both.
You know I remember being inthe hospital and saying God, I
just consent for you to dowhatever you're going to do.
I know you're going to restoreme, because that's what your
word tells me is that you'regoing to restore me even if it
doesn't look like it now.
(34:08):
And I also said if my wife dies, I know you can bring her back,
but even if you don't, even ifyou don't, I will still trust
you.
Like, are you willing to acceptreality and accept a
restoration?
Are you allowing God to definethe situation?
Are you allowing God to havehis say on the subject?
(34:30):
Listen, whatever it is, whateverhappens, whatever has happened,
you have a reason to rejoice inhope, and the reason why is
because the things that you'relooking to happen, whether they
be vain wishes or somewhere deep, some precious hope for you or
something that is assured, anexpectation of God's goodness
(34:51):
for the future, you can alwaysrest on God's goodness and his
kindness.
You can always rest on hisassurance to do the best thing
in the future.
You can always rest on God'sgoodness and his kindness.
You can always rest on hisassurance to do the best thing
in the moment.
Because the fact is, eventhough we might wrestle with
trust issues with God and aninsecure attachment with him,
god tells us that he knows bestand he's working actively to
bring about the best for yoursituation.
Because you love him and you'recalled according to his purpose,
(35:13):
there's nothing that canseparate you from his love.
He can make you a conqueror inall those things that you're
dealing with.
That's what Romans 8 tells us.
There is no condemnation forthose who are in Christ Jesus
and for those who have put theirfaith in Christ.
Even the mistakes that we'vemade, even the things that were
in our control, we can put thedeath and move forward in a more
life-giving direction throughChrist, because we're sons and
(35:35):
daughters, because we've beengiven the spirit of sonship
instead of the spirit of fearthat we may again be slaves.
God has made us sons anddaughters through the spirit of
sonship, by whom we cry out,abba, father.
When we cry out, abba, father,we're acknowledging to the
Father that he is over it all.
You know who went upstairs andsaved a little kid's life today
His dad, me.
Now I want to acknowledge toothat as soon as that was over, I
(35:59):
was like Jesus, thank you.
Thank you, jesus, for saving myson.
Thank you, jesus for providingfor him.
Thank you, jesus for letting mebe in the right place at the
right time.
Thank you, jesus for what Itried to do, for bringing
effectiveness to that.
And it must feel kind of weird,like hear me talk about this
and like see me laughing orsomething, but like I'm just so
(36:20):
enjoy because my son is okay,you know, and um, but who did
that?
It was his father.
It was his dad, right.
And like my wife called out andsaid hey, I think Luca is
choking, come here, you know.
And so I ran upstairs and dealtwith it.
And the thing is like God isready to drop everything and
save your life.
God is ready to drop everythingand do what's absolutely the
best thing you know, and he'sgoing to do the absolute best
(36:41):
thing that he knows to do foryour life, just as I would as
dad.
I'm an earthly, I'm an earthlyman, broken, mistake making,
dude, okay, and I got fourchildren that depend on me to be
a dad and and that receive goodgifts from me.
And yet how much more does yourHeavenly Father love you and
(37:02):
have the intent to come in andrescue you and provide for you.
In the midst of what you'regoing through, there's nothing
that can separate you from yourFather's love for you, even the
mistakes you've made.
He's not looking to condemn you, bro, sister.
Okay, he's looking to help you.
He's looking to change you.
Okay, he's looking to help you.
He's looking to change you.
He's looking to restore you.
He's looking to rescue you andif you let him, he will redeem
(37:22):
and reuse every struggle, everyproblem, every loss to work out
and redound to his glory andyour goodness.
So I'm not sure where you're at.
I just want you to just beassured of the hope, though you
know I want you to have the hope.
Have hope, because hope is allyou've got sometimes.
Sometimes, whether you'recrying on the kitchen floor,
like I was one day, or you'reholding your baby boy in your
(37:46):
arms because God provided, oryou're holding your baby boy in
your arms because God didn't theway you wanted, hope is all
you've got, man.
Even the Bible tells us don'tmourn as those who have no hope.
Even in mourning we have hope.
That's in first thessalonians,chapter 5, by the way I'd
encourage you to read it becauseit talks about the future hope
(38:06):
of jesus returning.
Don't ever mourn your losses asif there is no hope, and not
because god is trying to come inand devalidate your feelings of
despair.
What he's trying to tell you isthat yo, in your feelings and
in your thought life that saysthere's no hope, here there is
hope, actually, there's hopeunder every rock, because no
matter where you're goingthrough, no matter what you're
(38:28):
dealing with, god is in controlin those things.
He's superintending the wholeprocess to work out for a
greater story, and if you'rewilling to let him, he'll use it
.
Anyway, process to work out fora greater story, and if you're
willing to let him, he'll use it.
Anyway.
I said that enough.
I want to circle back torestoration.
You know how could thissituation tend towards
restoration?
So I've already mentioned, okay, that my son, luca, reminds me
(38:49):
of restoration, and I want tocircle back to that because
there's stuff in your life thatif you were to look back on, you
could think, yeah, god is arestorer.
God gave me hope.
Then he can give me hope now.
God gave me provision.
Then he can give me provisionnow.
God helped me through thattransition.
He can help me through thissituation.
(39:10):
So, reflect on this too.
Reflect on this.
What is something that God hasdone in your life or shown you
in the word that reminds you ofhis restoration?
What's something that hearkensback to his restoration in your
life?
What is something that hearkensback to the presence of God
meeting you and hearkens back toa rescue?
(39:31):
What is something in your lifetoday, you know, like I've got
scars on my body that remind meof how good god is.
You know, I literally, um, Ihave, uh, I have, you know,
scars on me.
I've got my wife.
You know my wife carries thescars from her surgery and, even
though she doesn't like scarson her body, duh, um, you know,
(39:54):
it is a reminder that she's okay.
Uh, it's kind of interestingthat the scars that were made on
her body, like save her life,uh, created an anchor on her
belly.
An anchor and anchor, of course,is, you know, symbolic of hope.
Like jesus is our forerunner,he goes behind the curtain, he
holds on to hope for us and, um,this hope is an anchor for the
(40:15):
soul and you know you need thatsometimes.
Sometimes you need that hope.
You need that hope to anchoryou and harbor you.
Is there something in your liferight now that you look around
and you think that's an anchorfor me, that's an encouragement,
that little drawing that mychild did when they were seven
years old, before this accident,blah, blah, blah.
That reminds me of God's love,that reminds me of God's
(40:36):
goodness, that reminds me ofGod's goodness.
This reminds me, you know, andI mean maybe for you it's like
your child's wheelchair orsomething that like they had a
horrible accident, somethingterrible happened, maybe they
had a stroke or whatever it is.
And when you look at thatwheelchair you think if it
hadn't been for God providing mychild would not even be here at
all, and that wheelchair is nowcarrying them into every area
(40:59):
that they end up being in.
You know this is a reminder forme and now for some of you you
might think about it as a chainor something as a burden to
carry or whatever.
But, like I want to remind youthat what you're left with after
a season of loss can be whatlifts you up through a different
season of loss.
(41:20):
Wrap your head around that one.
What you are left with after aseason of loss can be the very
thing that lifts you in anotherseason of loss.
So you know, for me, what wewere left with was the scars
(41:47):
from my wife's surgery, and wewere left with the inability to
have kids.
We were left with all kinds ofthings, and yet God used those
exact things to lift us up laterwhen, three years to the day
(42:09):
that my wife was admitted to thehospital, three years to the
day that my wife was admitted tothe maternity floor, because
they didn't really know where toput her, so they just put her
in the maternity floor becausethere were other babies there
and so we had her baby with usat the time.
So they're like, okay, fine, um, so they put her in the
maternity floor on the exactsame maternity floor come, on
(42:30):
the exact same floor my wife wasadmitted to three years ago.
Three, three years to that day,three years later, my son Luca
was born.
My son Luca was born on July1st 2021.
My wife told me about somethingthat she had seen her
(42:55):
grandfather, her deadgrandfather, in the corner of
the room around that same timeof night, that same day, three
years before.
And she went into her surgeryJuly 2nd in the morning I think
it was like seven or eight inthe morning she went into her
surgery.
Maybe it was nine, doesn'tmatter.
So she went into her surgeryJuly 2nd 2018.
(43:17):
July 1st, canada Day.
She was telling me that she wasgoing to.
She was like, she was basicallyindicating to me I'm dying, you
know.
And then, three years to theday, that same hospital floor,
we have our baby boy born to us,because the department called
us and said, yo, you still wanta baby.
And we're like, yes, and youknow, it was like maybe a week
(43:41):
and a half, two weeks, and wehad a baby, had a baby, had a
baby boy and, um, the uh, thepajamas that my baby boy were
wearing, my boy was wearing, um,after he had, you know, gotten
cleaned up and all this stuff,like we were in the room, we
were in the room for the birthof our, of our youngest son,
(44:03):
what like.
Anyway, it was crazy.
And he came home with us likedays later.
He had to go on a little boogieboard, you know, for the uv
thing, and then he came with uslater that week.
God is faithful.
God can bring restoration outof any situation.
(44:23):
If you allow him, if you, uh,if you allow god and not refuse
it, he can redefine and reuse itwhatever it is, he'll help you.
So I want to pray for you andsay goodbye, father.
I pray for the person listeningtoday that they would be
transformed by hope, that theirmind and even the pathways in
(44:46):
their mind would redefine forthem what they're going through
in their life, that they wouldexperience the difficulties as a
sign that you're faithful, asign that you're up to something
, and they would see behindevery sign the indication that
(45:07):
you're with them in theirsituation for their restoration.
Amen, yeah, whoa, listen, thisis great.
I want you to pray this with me.
Okay, I have never done thisbefore.
I think maybe a couple times.
Repeat this after me if youwant to allow God to reuse your
situations.
Dear Jesus, come into my heartafresh, holy Spirit, invade my
(45:31):
life afresh, life afresh.
Father, set your love in myheart afresh.
Save me, rescue me here,forgive me of my sins and
(45:52):
restore me.
Use it whatever it is.
You can think about that rightnow.
You're thinking about thesituation you're going through.
Use it In Jesus' name.
Amen.
Oh my gosh, thank you so much.
I went so much deeper into thatstory than I was planning on
doing, but I think it was for agood reason, good purpose.
May you be blessed.
This is NREST.
Would love to see you connectwith us on Instagram @inrest.
(46:13):
insta.
We've got Spotify.
Okay, if you're watching thison YouTube, check it rest dot
insta.
We've got Spotify.
And if you are watching this onYouTube, subscribe to this
channel.
Okay, right, or somewhere.
Subscribe to it and like thisvideo and share it with somebody
that you think needs it.
Maybe it's somebody's goingthrough a health problem, maybe
somebody's going throughfertility issues and they're
struggling.
Hey, send it, send the story,send this podcast episode,
(46:34):
because this is probably themost in-depth I've ever gotten
on my story, I think, in apodcast episode in my life so
far.
So you know, use it, don't loseit.
Reuse it, you know, rocky, okay, that's a Paw Patrol reference,
by the way.
Anyway, jesus loves you, so doI?
Check out and rest, okay, bye.
Popular Podcasts
Cold Case Files: Miami
Joyce Sapp, 76; Bryan Herrera, 16; and Laurance Webb, 32—three Miami residents whose lives were stolen in brutal, unsolved homicides. Cold Case Files: Miami follows award‑winning radio host and City of Miami Police reserve officer Enrique Santos as he partners with the department’s Cold Case Homicide Unit, determined family members, and the advocates who spend their lives fighting for justice for the victims who can no longer fight for themselves.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.