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June 13, 2025 60 mins

What if romantic love is just a story we made up? Looking back at the origins of courtly love, it looks like we might have. 


Sonja takes us back to the Middle Ages and explains how, in an attempt to control a particular problem, society might have created a story that still echoes today.  This is the story that, on one hand, animates beloved romcoms, while on the other hand, forges die-hard Valentine’s Day haters.  As an illustration of this story in action, Sonja takes Vanessa through a wonderful retelling of one of literature’s most influential courtly love stories:  the tale of Tristan and Iseult.  


If you’ve ever wondered why society seems to put such a high value on romantic love or have sensed something dark and unsettling lurking in the storyline, then you’ll be interested to hear how it all got started.  Along the way, we find out that all boats should have harps in their First Aid kids, boots are handy for storing body parts, and sometimes your ex and your wife have the same name.  Because of the wildness of the Tristan and Iseult tale, this will be the first Explicit episode of In Walks a Woman, so if you are listening with kiddos in the backseat, you might wait until you drop them off at school.  


REFERENCES:


The Romance of Tristan & Iseult by J. Bedier & translated by Hilaire Belloc can be purchased here.


Love in the Western World by Denis de Rougemont can be purchased here new or here used.


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