May 30, 2025 • 13 mins
In this heartfelt episode of the Infinitely Precious Podcast, James Henry reflects on the theme of endings—both the ones we anticipate and those that surprise us. Sharing personal stories from the last six months, including his father’s passing and his own transition from St. James United Methodist Church, James invites listeners to honor the finite nature of our time by showing up fully in each moment. He explores the idea that “our best” may look different in different contexts, and that the true invitation of endings is to offer our fullest presence, however imperfect, to the people and situations we encounter. Through tender storytelling and gentle wisdom, this episode offers encouragement to live each moment with intention and reverence, knowing that every goodbye, every ending, is an opportunity to be as kind, engaged, and authentic as possible.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Intro (00:00):
Welcome to the Infinitely Precious Podcast produced by
(00:03):
Infinitely Precious LLC. Yourhost is James Henry. Remember,
you are infinitely precious andunconditionally loved for the
gift you already are.
James (00:12):
Hello beloved, it's me James and I've been thinking a
lot about endings recently andthe endings that we can see, the
endings that we don't realizeare coming. Because both of
those exist in our lives andthey've existed side by side in
(00:38):
my life in the last six monthsor so. Endings are rather
beautiful and challenging timesbecause when something that we
know ends and we don't know whatwe're stepping into next, we're
(00:58):
left with the uncertainty, andthat uncertainty can turn into
fear. It can become anxiety. Itcan become the running wild of
our imagination about all thepossibilities both positive and
negative and we are drawn in towondering about that future.
(01:28):
So what I'm learning or whatlife is teaching me is something
I wanted to pass along to youand perhaps you've seen the same
thing and you will just hearthis as an affirmation of what
you're already discovering aboutself in the world and that is I
am trying to treat each momentas a moment when I'm going to
(01:51):
show up as the best self that Ican in that moment. I encourage
you to do the same and thereason is you don't know if this
is the last moment. Now, to takea step back from that, this week
has been filled with a couple oflast moments for me. Earlier
(02:12):
this week was my last weeklyreflective moment that I made as
the pastor of St. James on abouta ten minute reflection I do on
Tuesdays at noon.
And yesterday, on Thursday wasmy last sacred reading as the
(02:38):
pastor of St. James. I've beendoing those as online stories,
online pieces that people canengage as they choose wherever
they are, whenever they arebecause I think that's how
people engage things nowwherever and whenever they are,
whenever they can. They're notalways available when things
happen. So, being able to seethem later is a wonderful
(03:01):
opportunity for them toparticipate if not live, then
certainly in the fabric of whatwas presented at that time.
The difference was that thosetwo moments I knew were the last
time I was making a moment. Andso, they gave me the opportunity
(03:22):
to talk about what transitionslook like. And I felt the
emotion bubble up inside of meknowing that they were the last
moments. I think when we knowthat this is our last meeting,
(03:44):
last gesture, function in aparticular place, it gives us
pause. Is it have we put forthour best effort?
What is it that we have producedin that moment? And it gives us
the ability to try to say in ourbest possible way, farewell to
(04:06):
those events, thoserelationships that are coming to
an end. Earlier this year, itlooked like for a period of time
that my father was in theprocess of dying. And then it
looked like he was in theprocess of rebounding. And then
suddenly, he took a turn and diddie.
(04:27):
During that last little bit morethan a month of his life,
knowing that he was in a moretenuous space than he had been
at any time I'd ever known him,gave me the opportunity to say,
I don't want to avoid this time.This is an opportunity for me to
(04:54):
put myself out there to takerisks and to spend my time to
make sure that I talk about allthe things that might otherwise
become unfinished business afterhe passed from this mortal
realm. And so, I took theopportunities to have those
(05:16):
conversations about death andabout life and relationships and
we were able to take care of allthe unfinished business. And
when he did die, I knew I hadsaid everything that I needed to
say. Were there more things tosay?
(05:37):
Sure. But I had said the thingsI needed to say, I had heard the
things I wanted to hear and thatsaying farewell was okay. It
hurt, it still hurts, I can feeleven the motion bubbling up as
I'm talking about them, but Iknew that the ending could come
(06:03):
and the reality of our ownfinitude was very real to me.
And because it became very real,I tried to put my best foot
forward and be as fully presentas I could be and give my best
to those moments we have, notknowing if they're the last
(06:24):
moment. This last Tuesday, Iknew was my last moment to do a
moment for St.
James. On Thursday, that was mylast moment to do a sacred
reading, a Thursday sacredreading as the pastor of St.
James and that's after thirtythree years of being the pastor.
(06:44):
So endings happen. They aregoing to happen.
Our lives are going to end. Thework we're going to do is going
to end. At some point I knew inthe future my time at St. James
as the pastor would end eitherwith my retirement or death or
the bishop doing what the bishopdid this time which was to move
(07:07):
me elsewhere. In all thosecases, knowing the eventuality
of an end is not the same asliving the best moment we can
right now.
And what I'm trying to say, Ithink, what I'm trying to say to
myself, the lesson that Igleaned from these last six
(07:28):
months if nothing else is mylife is finite. My time at St.
James is finite, my time with myfather was finite. Everything on
this side of eternity is finiteFor me, this form in which I
find myself right now will notlast forever. And so, I am given
(07:58):
pause and the opportunity inevery moment to recognize to do
my best in that moment.
Now, I've talked about thisbefore, my best in some moments
is not nearly as good as my bestin another moment, and that's
okay because what I bring to anygiven moment, what you bring to
(08:19):
any given moment is different.It's different. It's not the
same. So knowing that we areinvited, we are invited to treat
each moment with a certain kindof reverence. This could be the
last time I drive to work.
(08:41):
This could be the last time Italk to someone who is important
in my life. This could be thelast word I say to a stranger
that I pass on the street. Itmight be the last word that they
hear. Knowing that, knowing theimport of each opportunity I
have to put my best footforward, to be the best I can be
(09:05):
in that moment, knowing thatimport invites me to take
seriously every moment that I'min. The moment when I am
recording these podcasts to tryto be the best self I can be.
Every moment at work, everymoment at play, every
(09:27):
conversation with familymembers, even when I may be
tired from a long day,Conversations with people I
don't even know. To try to bethe best within the boundaries
of my own limitations in anygiven moment wherever I am. It's
an invitation that life presentsus because we never know if
(09:51):
that's our last moment or theperson with whom we're
encountering this last moment,the last experience we'll have
of that kind. So being able toreflect on endings that I knew
were coming and got a sense oftheir impending nature invited
me to reflect on the sense thatevery moment is an invitation to
(10:15):
be the best we can be. Are youbeing the best you that you know
how to be in this moment?
Are you giving your best,putting your best foot forward
and your best foot forward on aday that's been exhausting and
has taken everything out of youand left you in a tough spot?
Even on those days is your bestmay be not blowing up at a small
(10:43):
infraction in your life, at asmall irritant in your life. It
may be holding back the wordsthat want to flow from you, the
words that are ugly, not sayingthem in a moment. That may be
the best you've got. Someonepushes your last button, you
know, the last straw that breaksthe camel's back and what you
(11:06):
want to say could be hurtful notonly in the moment but over the
long haul.
And instead of saying it, yourbest in that moment may be to
simply withhold saying anything.Our best looks different in any
given moment Depending on ourmood, depending upon our energy
(11:27):
level, depending upon what'shappened and led us up to this
moment, depending on how weperceive the moment we are in,
all of those things change whatthe best can be in this moment.
And the best is not perfect.It's never perfect. You are not
asked to be perfect.
(11:47):
Even the biblical word forperfect, whether it's in Greek
or Aramaic that Jesus uses isnot a word about moral
perfection. It is about being asmature, as complete, as engaged
as you possibly can. That's whatit means. To give your best is
not to be perfect. It is to beas good as you can be in a
(12:09):
moment.
Can you be ripe in the moment?Can you be fruitful in this
moment even if fruitfulness iswithholding words that want to
leap out of you? That's reallythe question of endings. Can we
give the best so that thismoment, were it to be the last,
(12:34):
would be a moment that I did allthat I could in that moment to
be fully present, fully engaged,fully as kind and as good as I
could be in that moment. Thoseare my thoughts this week as I'm
pondering endings.
About a month left right nowuntil I have moved into a new
(12:57):
house and am about to take a newposition, a new pastorate at
another church, Doolin Church inFalls Church, Virginia in The
United States. As I make thattransition, as I see a lot of
(13:17):
lasts and endings in my lifecoming along, can I be the best
I can be in those moments? Allthe emotions, everything else
wrapped up, can I be that? Canyou be that in whether it's an
ending or whether you don't knowif it's ending, can you be that?
No matter which or what you findyourself doing remember you're
(13:39):
infinitely precious andunconditionally loved for the
gift you already are.
Until the next time I join you,I wish you all the best.
Welcome to the Infinitely Precious Podcast produced by
(00:03):
Infinitely Precious LLC. Yourhost is James Henry. Remember,
you are infinitely precious andunconditionally loved for the
gift you already are.
James (00:12):
Hello beloved, it's me James and I've been thinking a
lot about endings recently andthe endings that we can see, the
endings that we don't realizeare coming. Because both of
those exist in our lives andthey've existed side by side in
(00:38):
my life in the last six monthsor so. Endings are rather
beautiful and challenging timesbecause when something that we
know ends and we don't know whatwe're stepping into next, we're
(00:58):
left with the uncertainty, andthat uncertainty can turn into
fear. It can become anxiety. Itcan become the running wild of
our imagination about all thepossibilities both positive and
negative and we are drawn in towondering about that future.
(01:28):
So what I'm learning or whatlife is teaching me is something
I wanted to pass along to youand perhaps you've seen the same
thing and you will just hearthis as an affirmation of what
you're already discovering aboutself in the world and that is I
am trying to treat each momentas a moment when I'm going to
(01:51):
show up as the best self that Ican in that moment. I encourage
you to do the same and thereason is you don't know if this
is the last moment. Now, to takea step back from that, this week
has been filled with a couple oflast moments for me. Earlier
(02:12):
this week was my last weeklyreflective moment that I made as
the pastor of St. James on abouta ten minute reflection I do on
Tuesdays at noon.
And yesterday, on Thursday wasmy last sacred reading as the
(02:38):
pastor of St. James. I've beendoing those as online stories,
online pieces that people canengage as they choose wherever
they are, whenever they arebecause I think that's how
people engage things nowwherever and whenever they are,
whenever they can. They're notalways available when things
happen. So, being able to seethem later is a wonderful
(03:01):
opportunity for them toparticipate if not live, then
certainly in the fabric of whatwas presented at that time.
The difference was that thosetwo moments I knew were the last
time I was making a moment. Andso, they gave me the opportunity
(03:22):
to talk about what transitionslook like. And I felt the
emotion bubble up inside of meknowing that they were the last
moments. I think when we knowthat this is our last meeting,
(03:44):
last gesture, function in aparticular place, it gives us
pause. Is it have we put forthour best effort?
What is it that we have producedin that moment? And it gives us
the ability to try to say in ourbest possible way, farewell to
(04:06):
those events, thoserelationships that are coming to
an end. Earlier this year, itlooked like for a period of time
that my father was in theprocess of dying. And then it
looked like he was in theprocess of rebounding. And then
suddenly, he took a turn and diddie.
(04:27):
During that last little bit morethan a month of his life,
knowing that he was in a moretenuous space than he had been
at any time I'd ever known him,gave me the opportunity to say,
I don't want to avoid this time.This is an opportunity for me to
(04:54):
put myself out there to takerisks and to spend my time to
make sure that I talk about allthe things that might otherwise
become unfinished business afterhe passed from this mortal
realm. And so, I took theopportunities to have those
(05:16):
conversations about death andabout life and relationships and
we were able to take care of allthe unfinished business. And
when he did die, I knew I hadsaid everything that I needed to
say. Were there more things tosay?
(05:37):
Sure. But I had said the thingsI needed to say, I had heard the
things I wanted to hear and thatsaying farewell was okay. It
hurt, it still hurts, I can feeleven the motion bubbling up as
I'm talking about them, but Iknew that the ending could come
(06:03):
and the reality of our ownfinitude was very real to me.
And because it became very real,I tried to put my best foot
forward and be as fully presentas I could be and give my best
to those moments we have, notknowing if they're the last
(06:24):
moment. This last Tuesday, Iknew was my last moment to do a
moment for St.
James. On Thursday, that was mylast moment to do a sacred
reading, a Thursday sacredreading as the pastor of St.
James and that's after thirtythree years of being the pastor.
(06:44):
So endings happen. They aregoing to happen.
Our lives are going to end. Thework we're going to do is going
to end. At some point I knew inthe future my time at St. James
as the pastor would end eitherwith my retirement or death or
the bishop doing what the bishopdid this time which was to move
(07:07):
me elsewhere. In all thosecases, knowing the eventuality
of an end is not the same asliving the best moment we can
right now.
And what I'm trying to say, Ithink, what I'm trying to say to
myself, the lesson that Igleaned from these last six
(07:28):
months if nothing else is mylife is finite. My time at St.
James is finite, my time with myfather was finite. Everything on
this side of eternity is finiteFor me, this form in which I
find myself right now will notlast forever. And so, I am given
(07:58):
pause and the opportunity inevery moment to recognize to do
my best in that moment.
Now, I've talked about thisbefore, my best in some moments
is not nearly as good as my bestin another moment, and that's
okay because what I bring to anygiven moment, what you bring to
(08:19):
any given moment is different.It's different. It's not the
same. So knowing that we areinvited, we are invited to treat
each moment with a certain kindof reverence. This could be the
last time I drive to work.
(08:41):
This could be the last time Italk to someone who is important
in my life. This could be thelast word I say to a stranger
that I pass on the street. Itmight be the last word that they
hear. Knowing that, knowing theimport of each opportunity I
have to put my best footforward, to be the best I can be
(09:05):
in that moment, knowing thatimport invites me to take
seriously every moment that I'min. The moment when I am
recording these podcasts to tryto be the best self I can be.
Every moment at work, everymoment at play, every
(09:27):
conversation with familymembers, even when I may be
tired from a long day,Conversations with people I
don't even know. To try to bethe best within the boundaries
of my own limitations in anygiven moment wherever I am. It's
an invitation that life presentsus because we never know if
(09:51):
that's our last moment or theperson with whom we're
encountering this last moment,the last experience we'll have
of that kind. So being able toreflect on endings that I knew
were coming and got a sense oftheir impending nature invited
me to reflect on the sense thatevery moment is an invitation to
(10:15):
be the best we can be. Are youbeing the best you that you know
how to be in this moment?
Are you giving your best,putting your best foot forward
and your best foot forward on aday that's been exhausting and
has taken everything out of youand left you in a tough spot?
Even on those days is your bestmay be not blowing up at a small
(10:43):
infraction in your life, at asmall irritant in your life. It
may be holding back the wordsthat want to flow from you, the
words that are ugly, not sayingthem in a moment. That may be
the best you've got. Someonepushes your last button, you
know, the last straw that breaksthe camel's back and what you
(11:06):
want to say could be hurtful notonly in the moment but over the
long haul.
And instead of saying it, yourbest in that moment may be to
simply withhold saying anything.Our best looks different in any
given moment Depending on ourmood, depending upon our energy
(11:27):
level, depending upon what'shappened and led us up to this
moment, depending on how weperceive the moment we are in,
all of those things change whatthe best can be in this moment.
And the best is not perfect.It's never perfect. You are not
asked to be perfect.
(11:47):
Even the biblical word forperfect, whether it's in Greek
or Aramaic that Jesus uses isnot a word about moral
perfection. It is about being asmature, as complete, as engaged
as you possibly can. That's whatit means. To give your best is
not to be perfect. It is to beas good as you can be in a
(12:09):
moment.
Can you be ripe in the moment?Can you be fruitful in this
moment even if fruitfulness iswithholding words that want to
leap out of you? That's reallythe question of endings. Can we
give the best so that thismoment, were it to be the last,
(12:34):
would be a moment that I did allthat I could in that moment to
be fully present, fully engaged,fully as kind and as good as I
could be in that moment. Thoseare my thoughts this week as I'm
pondering endings.
About a month left right nowuntil I have moved into a new
(12:57):
house and am about to take a newposition, a new pastorate at
another church, Doolin Church inFalls Church, Virginia in The
United States. As I make thattransition, as I see a lot of
(13:17):
lasts and endings in my lifecoming along, can I be the best
I can be in those moments? Allthe emotions, everything else
wrapped up, can I be that? Canyou be that in whether it's an
ending or whether you don't knowif it's ending, can you be that?
No matter which or what you findyourself doing remember you're
(13:39):
infinitely precious andunconditionally loved for the
gift you already are.
Until the next time I join you,I wish you all the best.
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