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May 2, 2024 63 mins

Welcome to day 4 of Your Next Intuitive Business Breakthrough training series! I'm sharing foundational power tools, insights, and perspective shifts that have guided me and my clients towards greater clarity, intuition, and business success.

Feeling like you can’t do business or make decisions without constant overstimulation, emotional reactivity, or perfectionism? Are you sacrificing your well-being and authentic self to fit into societal norms and expectations?

What if instead, you could have a deep connection with your intuition, make aligned decisions effortlessly, and thrive in your sensitive nature? It’s possible. And it's easier than you think!

If you're like most highly sensitive people (HSPs), you want to harness the power of your sensitivity to create meaningful impact, live authentically, and achieve success on your terms.

In today’s episode, I’m going to give you steps and guidance on unlocking your intuition and developing self-compassion to transform your business and life. Whether you've been using survival-based coping mechanisms, struggling with overstimulation, or feeling disconnected from your true purpose, you can learn to trust your intuition, make aligned decisions, and inspire others with your unique gifts as a highly sensitive person.

Join Your Next Intuitive Business Breakthrough Free Series for full access to all trainings and bonus resources: https://wellbalance.ca/breakthrough 


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This podcast is for informational & inspirational purposes only. Nothing shared is intended as medical, psychological, or personalized advice, and should not be used as a substitute for professional support.

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello and welcome to day four of the training series,
your Next Intuitive BusinessBreakthrough.
I'm so happy that you're hereand if you've been listening
along to all the episodes inthis training series, I'm so
glad that you have stuck with me.
If you have not signed up forthe training series and you're
just stumbling across thisepisode, I highly suggest that

(00:23):
you sign up for the entiretraining series.
You can use the link in theshow notes to sign up and you
will receive one email a day forfive days with links to each of
the training modules in order,along with some additional
learning resources.
Now, in the first three days ofthis training series, I went

(00:46):
over three power tools to helpyou to better understand and
connect with your intuition,what the language of your
intuition is and how to use yourintuition and your design to
help you make the most aligneddecisions in your life and in
your business.

(01:07):
Now, today we're going tochange directions a little bit.
I've given you some power toolsand I've given you some
activities and exercises to try,and today I'm going to be
giving you a perspective toconsider and some deeper
underlying how and why, beyondjust doing some exercises, while

(01:30):
the exercises I gave you in thefirst three days are going to
help you to really betterunderstand yourself and
communicate and trust yourselfthat much more.
What I'm going to be talkingabout today is the deeper
mindset and perspective shiftsthat will make your puzzle
pieces click together that muchmore quickly.
And this is the secret saucethat, while the exercises and

(01:55):
the activities that I give youand that I give my clients will
help you to get more clarity, togive yourself answers, it's
this deeper level of the secretsauce that helps everything
happen more quickly, moreprofoundly, and give you bigger
breakthroughs in what seems likea magical instant.

(02:17):
So I've been talking aboutconnecting with your intuition
and how this is important tohelp you make intuitive
decisions for yourself, in yourlife and your business, as well
as using your intuition to guideyour clientele to bigger
breakthroughs and results beyondwhat professional skills alone
can deliver.

(02:37):
Intuitiveness and access tointuition is something that we
all have as a human being.
However, those of us who doidentify as being highly
sensitive have a remarkably highlevel of intuitiveness.
I would say naturally have abetter connection with our
intuition when we are in theright supportive environment in

(03:00):
order to connect fully with itand in order to trust it.
This is what we're going to betalking about today.
In episode one of this trainingseries I touched upon really
briefly, about when your nervoussystem is supported, then you
have better access to yourintuition, and studies prove

(03:21):
this to be true.
And so when your nervous systemis in survival mode, when we
are in high stress, unsupportiveenvironments both external
environments and internalenvironments, which I'll clarify
what that means in a little bitthen you will have less access
to your intuition.

(03:41):
You will have higher access toyour intuition when we have a
higher window of tolerance and,most importantly, when we have a
high level of coherence, asindicated by heart rate
variability.
And this is the thing inscientific literature that is
studied over and over again thatcoherence and heart rate

(04:05):
variability is a signal thatindicates that the nervous
system is well supported andalso that it indicates a
stronger connection to intuition.
Now, this nervous system aspectis something that is not new in
terms of a topic of conversation.
If you have been in my worldfor any length of time, no

(04:27):
matter which era of my businesspivot that I've been in in terms
of my niche and my focus andwho I'm working with, I've
always emphasized that thenervous system is a bridge.
It is a very important bridgethat will impact every single
physiological system in yourbody, and it will also impact

(04:50):
energetic components, includingaccess to your intuition, the
nervous system.
In terms of how the nervoussystem impacts your physical
body, in previous iterations ofmy work, when I was working with

(05:10):
people with chronic illness andautoimmunity and endometriosis,
for example, I listed off andmentioned scientific studies
that found a link betweennervous system dysregulation and
how it impacted the regulationof the immune system, and so
nervous system dysregulationcontributes to immune

(05:31):
dysregulation, which contributesto activation or worsening of
symptoms, of conditions ofimmune dysfunction, including
autoimmunity, includingendometriosis, including
fibromyalgia and allergies.
Now, this is not what the topicof today's conversation is
about, but the same root of yournervous system still holds true

(05:53):
when we are talking aboutconnecting with your intuition.
And why is that important?
Before I talk directly to theimportance of nervous system and
intuition and the importance ofconnecting with your intuition,
I want to take a step back fora minute and talk about highly
sensitive people, becausethere's some really important

(06:15):
associations here that I want toclick into place for you in
order to help you maybe widenyour perspective about yourself,
especially if you identify as ahighly sensitive person.
Highly sensitive people, orHSPs, otherwise known as sensory
processing sensitivity, make upabout 20 to 30% of the

(06:36):
population.
So people who have sensoryprocessing sensitivity,
otherwise known as highlysensitive people we are more
affected by our environment, forboth better and for worse.
So this means that if you're ahighly sensitive person and you
are in a negatively supportiveenvironment, you will have a

(07:00):
tendency to be more negativelysensitive, overwhelmed and
reactive to your environment,versus if you are a highly
sensitive person and you are ina positively supportive
environment.
Studies show that you will havegreater vantage sensitivity
than less sensitive individualsin the same environment.

(07:23):
And I'm going to unpack exactlywhat that means, because this
is so important and I don'tthink enough of us highly
sensitive people understand thisconcept when it comes to your
level of thriving in your life,in your work, in your business,
in your relationships theunderlying things that will help

(07:45):
you, as a highly sensitiveperson, not only just get by,
not only just do okay, but trulyflourish and thrive, over and
above what a less sensitiveperson will be experiencing if
they do the same things forthemselves.
To unpack this concept, first ofall, studies show that when a

(08:06):
highly sensitive person is in anunsupportive family or not in
the right conditions forthemselves, they're not
accommodating for theirsensitivity, needs and their
oversensitivity to environmentalconditions making adjustments

(08:27):
externally, and they are notsurrounded by supportive people,
then these highly sensitivepeople will have trouble
developing self-acceptance andcompassion and confidence
towards themselves, and thisleads them to believe that their
sensitivity is a flaw.
I can count myself as one ofthe people in this particular
subset of the population, havinggrown up in a family that did

(08:48):
not understand what highlysensitive person is.
And this is no surprise,because the term highly
sensitive person only enteredscientific literature in around
1997.
So if you're an adult listeningto this, especially if you're
in my generation, you grew up ina time where the term highly

(09:08):
sensitive person was not a knownterm and your parents
definitely were not up to dateon what we know now about
sensitivity, including my own,would not have understood
sensitivity, never mind know howto adequately nurture and
support the needs associatedwith this trait.

(09:29):
So this is point number one.
Keep this in mind.
I'm going to refer back to thisin a moment.
Versus studies show that whenthe highly sensitive person is
in a positive environment, bothexternally in terms of
accommodating for theirsensitivity needs, being
surrounded by supportive people,but also a positive inner

(09:54):
environment within themselves,they're going to thrive, and
studies show that they willexhibit a higher level of
cognition.
They will exhibit a higherlevel of cognition, of
productivity, of resilience,than somebody who is less
sensitive, who is in an equallysupportive environment, and this
is what they call vantagesensitivity.

(10:15):
So what this means is asupportive environment.
It's not just a nice to havefor highly sensitive people.
It's a key that unlocksabundant amounts of thriving,
and this is something that wedon't talk about a lot in
society, especially say, forexample, a lot of focus in the

(10:35):
medical system and in literatureis all about just trying to
manage symptoms, to try to feelsomewhat better when you're
feeling awful.
But the science shows that whenyou establish the right
conditions for yourself as ahighly sensitive person this
isn't just about just getting byand feeling less awful you're

(10:55):
going to thrive.
And when you thrive, you'regoing to be able to take all
those sensitive gifts that youhave within you, including your
connection with your intuition,and take that and put it in the
forefront of what you are doingso that you can create a bigger
impact, not only for yourselfand your work, but the people

(11:16):
that you are leading and forhumanity in general, and I'm
going to come back to thisconcept in a minute, because
there are scientific studiesthat prove that when you do this
, you can actually contribute toelevating the consciousness of
all of humanity, and I'llexplain what that means.
And I know that sounds huge,but it's absolutely possible.

(11:36):
And the root of all of this isyou finding the proper support
for yourself.
Now, this can include makingsure that you are positively
supporting yourself with yourenvironment in terms of managing
the amount of overstimulation,giving yourself adequate rest
and breaks and those types ofthings, and that can be helpful.

(11:57):
But there's a deeper root here.
There's a deeper root here thatwhen you address this deeper
root, you're going to find thatyour level of overstimulation
and your tolerance andresistance to things that may
have previously overwhelmed andoverstimulated you before when
you address this deeper root,you're going to find that likely
, you're going to be able totolerate more of these things

(12:21):
that may have previouslyoverwhelmed you.
You might think, oh well, thedeeper here is supporting your
nervous system.
While nervous system support isimportant and it's the first
thing that I always start within every single one of my
programs and with my one-on-oneclient work, is to make sure
that you're doing some things tosupport your nervous system,

(12:42):
whether it be things like deepbreathing, doing some exercise
as laid out by the HeartMathInstitute, maybe practicing
mindful awareness, doing thingslike meditation, vagal nerve
toning exercises.
These are examples of manydifferent ways that you can
support your nervous system andthey're all helpful approaches
and each of those things may bemore or less effective for you

(13:02):
depending on where you're at andwhat your particular needs can
support your nervous system.
And they're all helpfulapproaches and each of those
things may be more or lesseffective for you depending on
where you're at and what yourparticular needs are.
And all of these things willhelp you to support your nervous
system so that you can increaseand have a closer connection to
your intuition.
However, I am the queen ofdeeper and deeper.
I will go on this conceptbecause there is a deeper layer

(13:26):
to address underneath of thenervous things that I have found
in my own experience, in myprofessional experience working

(13:49):
with clients, and what I havefound in the scientific research
proves this to be true isself-compassion.
Self-compassion is the deeperhow you treat yourself, the
inner narrative in your mind,how kind and nurturing you are
to yourself, how supportive youare to yourself, versus being

(14:11):
overly critical or judgmental ofyourself.
And this is the thing if you'reconstantly hard on yourself,
you're always judging yourself.
You've got this constant levelof inner pressure, inner
judgment, inner guilt, innershame.
All of these things are goingto put mega pressure on your
nervous system.
And so you can do deepbreathing till the cows come

(14:33):
home and sure it's going to help, but it's only going to take
you so far.
And once you stop doing thenervous system support exercises
, if you haven't addressed thisunderlying root of the level of
self-compassion that you havefor yourself, you're going to
end up right back to where youwere before because this inner
emotional terrain hasn't shifted.

(14:55):
Going back to what I mentionedearlier about how, when a highly
sensitive person is not in apositively supportive family
environment, when they'regrowing up, they're going to
have trouble developingself-acceptance.
They're going to think theirsensitivity is a flaw and, like
I said, this has been myexperience.
I believe there is a directcorrelation between if you've

(15:18):
been raised in an unsupportivefamily environment and you don't
accept yourself, you don'taccept your sensitivity and you
believe that there is somethingwrong with you, then it is going
to be hard for you to havecompassion for yourself.
I know this was the case for me.
I was always trying to changemyself.

(15:38):
I was always insulting myselfand hard on myself because I
thought that if I did this, if Iwas constantly berating myself,
then maybe this could motivateme to change.
This is a social conditioningfactor, especially of those of
us who have come from ourgeneration and earlier.
We believe that we need thisnegative talk to motivate us to

(16:01):
better ourselves.
If I put myself down, that'llmotivate me to want to change
and of course, that's not thetruth.
It only takes you so far.
It's only a temporary solutionthat over time is not
sustainable and, as you can see,it really lacks self-compassion
, and self-compassion here isproven to be the key that will

(16:24):
help to A support your nervoussystem.
So when you haveself-compassion, studies have
shown that it increasescoherence, heart rate
variability.
Without doing all the exerciseslike the deep breathing and the
meditation and all of theseother things, nervous system is
just going to automatically bebetter supported and show higher

(16:49):
levels of coherence.
When you develop greaterself-compassion and studies show
that self-compassion decreasesself-judgment, decreases fatigue
.
Fatigue because all of thatinner volatility within yourself
is a very energetic process andit will drain your energy.

(17:11):
Self-compassion increases innercalmness, centeredness, clarity
, insight, connection to yourheart, energy, all of which
studies show enhances yourability to access your intuition
, and so I looked at somestudies.
They were looking atpsychotherapists and other types

(17:32):
of clinicians and level ofself-compassion, and these
studies indicate that lackingself-compassion can cause these
practitioners to be more tired,more irritable, more distracted,
less present, attentive,patient and kind, and that's
going to impact not only yourenergy levels, your level of

(17:53):
satisfaction with your work, butalso what you can facilitate
for your client In terms ofthese parts of ourselves that
might not be so compassionate.
It's kind of akin to as I wastalking about in the day two
training, when we spoke aboutwhat is your intuition and what
isn't, and when you hear voicesthat are not kind, that are not

(18:17):
gentle, that are not supportive,then likely those are other
parts talking and not yourintuition.
I mean, if you think about that, your intuition speaks to you
in a compassionate way.
In my mind, that makesintuition and compassion
synonymous in a way.
Those other voices that show up, as I mentioned, are other

(18:41):
parts, for example, yourprotective parts, and those
protective parts are operatingfrom survival behaviors right,
and survival behaviors don'talways think logically, and this
is why we have this thoughtthat comes up and this comes
from survival of well, if Idenigrate you, if I'm hard on
you, if I pressure you, thenthat's going to motivate you to

(19:02):
move, that's going to motivateyou to change, that's going to
motivate you to better yourself.
But here's the thing is thatyour sensitivity is a part of
you and the more that you rejectit, the more you try to change
it.
Because you think it's wrong,that you need to better yourself
and bettering yourself means tobe less sensitive then you are

(19:29):
working against yourself and itis next to impossible to have
compassion for yourself when youreject yourself.
Now, as a side note,self-rejection or lack of
acceptance of yourself is areally common, deeper emotional
root that I used to see a lotwhen I was working with people
dealing with autoimmunity andthe things that you don't accept
about yourself.
They're going to control you.

(19:49):
If you don't accept yoursensitive nature.
You're trying to soldier on,try to force yourself to be like
everybody else, even thoughyou're only 20 to 30% of the
population, and then you askyourself well, why can't I just
be like the rest of them?
Why can't I operate that way?
Why do I have to be this way?

(20:10):
When you have these thoughts,there's energy attached to them
and these thought processes andthe resulting energy impacts
your nervous system, impactspredominantly in terms of your
nervous system, your heart.
Your heart is such an importantcore of your entire organism.

(20:32):
The electromagnetic frequencythat's coming from your heart
impacts so much about yourphysiology and your psychology
and everything about you.
And it also impacts the peoplearound you, because people can
sense the electromagneticfrequency that you're putting
off.
And this is why just trying tocontrol your external

(20:54):
environment and putting on airs,putting on a mask, pretending
to be someone else, will onlytake you so far if you've got
this inner emotional terrainthat's laden with self-judgment
and self-rejection and innerguilt and shame and hardship.
Because that impacts your heartrate variability, it impacts

(21:15):
your level of coherence, itimpacts the electromagnetic
frequency that is impacting yourentire psychophysiological
system within your body, butalso impacting what other people
can sense from you and pick upfrom you, and studies show that
this helps not only you feelbetter and feel more regulated

(21:37):
within yourself and calmer andfilled with more happiness and
satisfaction and also improvesyour physical state and
emotional state.
But increasing your level ofcoherence, particularly through
developing more self-compassionand connecting with your
intuition, will help you to makemore aligned decisions and show

(22:00):
up in the world differently andI'll talk about that in a
minute.
And it's also going to impactthe electromagnetic frequency of
the people around you, andstudies show that this
contributes to raising thebaseline level of consciousness
within your workplace, infamilies, in communities, and

(22:22):
rippling out to more and morecommunities, so that you can end
up impacting social and globalcoherence, which can impact not
only your individual but alsocollective health and well-being
and contribute to harmonywithin the entire world.
And you might be listening tothis and going, wow, that sounds

(22:43):
really woo-woo.
Or you might be going, yeah,I'm right there with you.
I just want to point out,either way, that there is
scientific research that provesthis.
This is not just me making itup.
I wanted to go into theresearch to find the proof
before I shared this episodewith you, because it's that
important, and I wanted to showyou the proof so that it might

(23:04):
help you to trust thisparticular perspective shift
that I'm going to be sharingwith you today.
Okay, so what is this magicalperspective shift that I'm
alluding to in today's episode?
I think I will shape it aroundsharing a personal story with
you, and this is going to helpyou maybe understand how some of
these puzzle pieces fittogether.

(23:25):
As you know, I'm more deeplyconnected with my intuition now
than I definitely used to be inmy earlier years of my career,
especially when I was practicingas a naturopathic doctor, and,
as you know from my story andyou can go back and listen to
some of my previous podcastepisodes if you want to hear all
the details of all thedifferent iterations of my

(23:47):
journey and all the stages andpieces that I went through in
terms of my inner healing I diddo a nine-month spiritual coach
training program to help me tobetter connect with my intuition
, and it was helpful to a degree, but I still didn't understand

(24:09):
the whole concept of beingconnected with my intuition.
I wasn't picking up on thingslike my instructor or the other
class participants were.
There was a lot that I wasstill struggling with at that
time.
Even though I had done quite abit of healing, there were still
a lot of puzzle pieces missing.

(24:35):
What unfolded after I finishedthat program was connecting to a
psychic medium who connected mewith my mother's spirit, and if
you already know my history,you know that my mother passed
away in 2016.
That's what sparked a wholeseries of events that led me to
the worst autoimmune andendometriosis flare of my life,
that set me bed bound and it setme down this whole path of

(24:55):
discovering carnivore and movedme towards the first set of
pivots in my work, and thosepivots led me to taking that
spiritual coach training program, and it was a spiritual coach
training program that led me toconnect with the psychic medium
because she was a guest speakerat the very end of the course.

(25:17):
Now, this is the thing when Iconnected with my mother's
spirit, I ended up working withthis medium for nine months, so
another nine months.
It was this work with mymother's spirit that allowed me
to develop more self-acceptanceand more compassion for myself.
I was able to heal some deepmother wounds.
Here's the thing there's a lotof layers that I'm not going to

(25:41):
go into today about my motherwound and all the different
aspects of the inner healingpuzzle pieces that needed to
happen, but there's a couple ofreally important pieces that are
pertinent to this conversation,and those are the lack of
supportive behavior towards mysensitivity and the modeled

(26:04):
behavior of lack ofself-compassion.
As I was growing up, I watchedmy mom despise herself.
She had her own set of woundsthat she hadn't processed and
dealt with and moved through andbecause of that she lacked
compassion for herself.
And it was very obvious andthis was the type of behavior

(26:28):
that was modeled to me I was notmodeled compassionate
self-behavior.
That was problem number one.
And problem number two was thatmy mother did not accept my
sensitivity.
I was too sensitive.
I was always too sensitive.
It was always something that mymother continuously told me,
stopping so sensitive, to thepoint where, in her final days

(26:54):
where she was still verbalbefore she passed away, she told
me, michelle, if there's onething that you can do to become
a better person is to be lesssensitive, and that's huge To
get that message over and overand over again your whole
lifetime, right up until thedeath of my mother that I'm too

(27:14):
sensitive and if I want toimprove myself in any way, shape
or form, I need to be lesssensitive.
I need to improve myself in anyway, shape or form.
I need to be less sensitive.
I need to stop being sensitive.
Obviously, I did not have asupportive familial environment
growing up as a highly sensitiveperson, because I had a parent
figure who did not accept mysensitivity and she did not

(27:36):
accept herself, and so she wasmodeling lack of self-compassion
and she was modeling to me notto be compassionate with myself
because there was somethingwrong with me.
And so I grew up with thisbelief that my sensitivity was a
flaw, that there was somethingwrong with me that I needed to
change and I can't be myself andI can't trust myself because

(28:00):
there's something wrong with me.
And because of that, because ofthese beliefs that I had within
myself, a I could not becompassionate with myself
because I was filled withjudgment, I was filled with
shame and I was always filledwith inner pressure because I
couldn't seem to mask myselfenough to hide the sensitivity,

(28:22):
enough to be like everybody else.
I didn't fit in, and that justmade it worse, that reduced my
level of compassion for myself,because it made me feel like I
was failing, I didn't belong, Ididn't fit in, I was too
different and I just couldn'tfigure out how to fix myself so

(28:43):
that I could fit in, so that Icould be the person that my
mother was trying to tell methat I had to be.
Can you see how that can shapesomeone's inner emotional
environment and how that causedme to put so much strain on my
nervous system?
I was in constantself-rejection mode.

(29:04):
I was in constant hypervigilantmode, trying to figure out how
to adjust myself so that myexternal environment didn't feel
so overwhelming and so that Icould somehow be in control of
the people in my externalenvironment, so that I could

(29:25):
somehow feel safer, and I'm notgoing to go into too much detail
about that point today.
Note that one of my earlierpodcast episodes I do go into
greater detail about thisconcept in terms of people
pleasing.
Fast forwarding to all of thisinner healing work journey that
I had been on since my mompassed away and I went and

(29:45):
embarked on this spiritual coachtraining program which helped
me to understand shadow healingand integration.
And while there were parts ofme that were improving and I was
learning nervous systemregulation, there were so many
aspects of myself that wereimproving and, as a result, my
health was improving.
My endometriosis and autoimmuneflares were no longer

(30:09):
problematic.
Even though I was starting toreintroduce food again, there
were still some issues.
I still had a lot of foodsensitivities, even though I was
able to reintroduce a fewthings and I, like I mentioned
earlier, still wasn't fullyconnected to my intuition.
When I started working with mymother's spirit, one of the

(30:30):
things that really stuck in mymind was when the psychic medium
gave me this message that mymom admitted that she realizes
now how hurtful her behavior wasto me.
However, she was at a placewithin her own life and her own

(30:50):
existence that she was not ableto address these truths in her
living time.
They were too big for her, theywere too hard for her.
She was not capable of owningthese aspects and taking
responsibility for these aspectsof herself.
And this is the thing noteverybody is ready or willing to

(31:11):
look at these aspects of thedeep inner healing and taking
self-responsibility in thislifetime.
And she was one of them.
And as I was doing this deeperinner healing work and as I was
connecting with my mother'sspirit, it was allowing her to
do her own healing work on theother side that she was
incapable of doing during herlifetime.

(31:33):
And part of this work was heraccepting herself and who she
was, instead of rejectingherself because she deeply
lacked self-compassion becauseof her own experiences in her
upbringing, and likely, Ibelieve, she was a highly
sensitive person herself, andlikely she was not in a

(31:55):
supportive environment growingup, and so she lacked her own
self-acceptance and believed hersensitivity was a flaw, and so
when she saw that sensitivitywithin me, it triggered her.
Because this is how shadow workworks If there's something
within you that you don't feelat peace with, if you have not
come to terms with, and when yousee it in somebody else, if

(32:17):
you're not willing to take astep back and look at the wider
perspective and look at thepossibility of integrating and
coming to terms with theseaspects of yourself, if you
refuse to do that and you don'twant to look at that, then when
you see this in somebody else,it will trigger you.
I like to use feeling triggeredas a message that there's

(32:38):
something within you that youhave not come to terms with, and
I'll talk more deeply aboutthat in another podcast episode.
And this is definitely some ofthe deeper work that I work with
my clients with.
When we work one-on-one istaking a look at your triggers
gently and compassionately andseeing what about if there was

(32:59):
something that you feeltriggered about what's actually
going on underneath the surfacein terms of what are you not at
peace with?
What have you not come to termswith within yourself?
That's causing you to feeltriggered, and the same goes for
if somebody else is feelingtriggered by you.
Instead of assuming that it'syour fault, compassionately look

(33:19):
at them and the fact that maybethere's something within them
that they haven't come to termswith or not at peace with, and
that's why they're beingtriggered.
That's more than I have time toget into in today's episode.
So back to my story.
As I was working with my mom'sspirit and she was admitting
these things to me anddeveloping more compassion for

(33:41):
herself, she could develop morecompassion for me as she did
this and I could see theprogression over these nine
months.
At the very beginning, when shewas very unwilling to admit
certain things or talk aboutcertain things or address
certain things, as we continuedour back and forth conversation
through the psychic medium,there was a softening and an

(34:03):
opening and I could see morecompassion on her side and more
acceptance towards me.
I could see the truth of whyshe reacted the way that she did
towards me and I could see,through this unfolding, how much
she truly did love me and thesewere things I did not fully
understand before and throughthis unfolding, how much she
truly did love me.
And these were things I did notfully understand before.

(34:23):
And through this journey ofunderstanding and unpacking the
puzzle pieces and seeing thebigger picture and seeing the
shadows underneath it all andprocessing the emotions that
came with it.
Because there were lots ofemotions that came up Anger,
grief grief of not having thepositive, supportive environment
that I could have that wouldhave helped me to thrive as a

(34:47):
highly sensitive person.
And anger towards her for notproviding that for me.
And I had to move through thoseemotions to get to the other
side without attaching to theemotions.
So it's really important withemotions big emotions as you're
processing, like anger and griefnot to suppress them, not to
avoid them, but then also don'thold onto them and grasp onto

(35:11):
them and attach onto them sothat they don't move through you
.
When you're able to move throughthis process and let this move
through you, you come out theother side feeling more whole.
And that's what I experiencedfor myself is this process of
moving through, integratingthese mother wounds so that they

(35:33):
were no longer controlling me,so that they were no longer
controlling the inner voices inmy mind that were preventing me
from having compassion formyself, all of that inner
judgment you're too sensitive,there's something wrong with you
.
Stop being so weird, stop beingso woo.
You don't know what you'retalking about.
All of these things controlledme and they controlled my

(35:56):
decisions.
They controlled how I showed upfor myself in the world, in my
relationships, in my business,and I can definitely say that
there have been somerelationships in my past that
have been predominantlymotivated by these wounded parts
of myself.
And so can you see that yourlevel of self-compassion is not

(36:17):
only about helping to supportyour nervous system and helping
to connect with your intuition,but it also impacts your whole
energy system.
It impacts how people perceiveyou because of that
electromagnetic frequency thatyou put out, because all of this
impacts your heart ratevariability and level of

(36:37):
coherence, and it impacts thelevel of confidence that you
exhibit in how you show up inthe world and how you make your
decisions and choices.
Are you making decisions andchoices because they feel
aligned with your soul and yourpurpose, or are you making
decisions and choices becauseyou're trying to control your

(36:57):
external environment and thepeople around you so that you
can feel safer.
So people pleasing, for example, and perfectionism Studies show
that perfectionism behaviornaturally eases the more
self-compassion that you have.
Can you see how?
It's not about trying to changewho you are.
It's not about trying to changethe people pleasing or change

(37:20):
the perfectionism or change yoursensitivity.
It's about accepting yourselfand having compassion for
yourself and who you are andbeing human because humans are
by nature imperfect andaccepting this about yourself.
And when you do, these survival, coping behaviors naturally

(37:41):
ease because as you develop moreself-compassion, your nervous
system regulates, you develophigher coherence and you move
out of survival mode.
And when you have this innerself-compassion for yourself, it
creates a positive, supportiveenvironment.

(38:01):
And again going back to theresearch, when a highly
sensitive person puts themselvesin a positive, supportive
environment, then they thrive.
Then all of the negative aspectsand challenges of being highly
sensitive, right, theoverstimulation, the over

(38:22):
emotional reactivity, all ofthese things that can feel like
challenges to us actually startto diminish the more you are in
this positive, supportiveenvironment and more of the
positive aspects of sensitivitycome out, like your keen pattern
recognition, your connection tointuition, your connection to

(38:45):
your creativity, your uniqueout-of-the-box thinking that
solves problems and createsinnovative ideas that most
people don't see, perceive orpick up on.
And so for me and my story, asI worked with my mother spirit
and worked through theprocessing of unconditioning

(39:06):
from all the programmed beliefsthat I had been operating from,
these beliefs that I'm toosensitive, these beliefs that I
need to put other people'sdesires and opinions and
expectations before my own OnceI unconditioned from that and
started to create this deeper,more compassionate relationship

(39:27):
with myself and I reparentedmyself and I supported that
little inner child who neededthat positive, supportive
environment.
And I learned how to have thisnew relationship with myself
because of these hugeperspective shifts that I gained
through these conversationswith my mother spirit.
And when I did these things andwent through this process,

(39:50):
that's when my intuition woke up.
All of a sudden, I startednoticing that I was picking up
on things that I never used topick up on.
All of a sudden I was startingto notice, when I was in client
calls with them, I was seeingvisions and picking up on ideas
and concepts and objects andwords that were showing up in

(40:14):
the bottom right hand corner ofmy periphery in black and white,
and it was very obvious that itwasn't physical reality what I
was seeing.
It was some other type ofvision that was going on.
It kind of makes me think of ifyou've ever watched the
television show the Good Doctorand he'll look up and stare into
the abyss and you can see thathe's kind of like putting puzzle

(40:36):
pieces together and it's allkind of like in black and white
drawings.
It's kind of like that but alittle different, and it's more
in the lower right-hand cornerof my periphery and at first I
was scared of seeing thesethings.
What are these things that I'mlooking at?
Why are they showing up?
Especially when I was connectingwith a client and as I

(40:56):
continued my own inner healingand developed more acceptance
and compassion for myself anddeveloped a sense of inner
safety within myself, I decidedthat I was going to start to
speak up and ask my clients hey,I'm seeing something right now
and it doesn't make a whole lotof sense to me, but would you
like me to tell you what I see?

(41:18):
What happened blew everybody'sminds.
I would start to explain what Iwas seeing and instant light
bulb moments of oh my god,that's exactly what I needed to
hear.
Oh my god, you just solved aquestion problem issue that I've
been trying to figure out formonths or years, or sometimes

(41:39):
they would break down in tears,joyful and appreciative, because
that was the exact thing thatmade everything make sense.
And the more I got thesereactions, the more I started to
trust.
Oh, this is a thing.
Oh, I see.
This is my intuition, this isclairvoyance, this is my ability
to pick up on things outside of, maybe, physical reality.

(42:01):
And, as my husband puts it,because when I told him what I
pick up on, he said that doesn'tsurprise me at all.
You're a highly sensitiveperson and now that you've
accepted your sensitivity,you're able to pick up on more
and more nuanced stuff that mostpeople can't see, but it's

(42:21):
there.
The reason why I'm using thisstory today is because doing
this inner healing work todevelop more self-compassion for
myself was a key that unlockeda gate.
I had already done nine monthsof training to connect with my
intuition and while there wassome progression in my intuitive

(42:42):
knowing doing the work that Idid in that nine month coach
training program, what happenedonce I did this inner
self-compassion healing work?
All of a sudden, it was like myintuition blew wide open.
And that's the differencebetween, say, for example, just

(43:03):
doing nervous system supporttools or just relying on, maybe,
some of the foundational powertools that I gave you in the
first three days of thistraining.
They're going to help you, andif you don't have inner
self-compassion for yourself,they're only going to take you
so far.
This is why, on day four,mentioning this concept of

(43:25):
compassion for yourself is goingto be the next key that unlocks
even bigger breakthroughs foryourself in terms of connecting
with your intuition, in terms ofcoming up with the business
ideas and decisions and makingthe most aligned decisions for
yourself that set you up to bedoing business on your terms, to

(43:49):
be connected with your solepurpose, to be doing work that
not only is successful butdelivers profound and deep
satisfaction, while also leavinga meaningful impact that you
know that you want to be making.
Because if you're a highlysensitive person, you feel the
suffering in the world and,likely, you want to contribute

(44:13):
to making it better.
And this is a secret key itstarts with you always, if you
want to contribute to collectivehealing, collective harmony,
collective peace, collectivebetterment of well-being on any
level within humanity, it alwaysstarts with you.

(44:33):
And one really important pieceof this puzzle is
self-compassion and connectingwith your intuition, because
when you do these things, youincrease your coherence and this
puts you in a state of heartrate variability that will
impact not only you but everyonearound you, and it impacts your

(44:54):
choices and it impacts yourbehavior and it impacts your
level of emotional regulationand it impacts those of the
people around you throughexample, through electromagnetic
frequency and through a wholeother series of factors that
likely, we don't even know howto measure yet.
When you develop this level ofcoherence within yourself,

(45:19):
through compassion, throughconnection with your intuition,
through supporting your nervoussystem, this is known as
heart-based living, and thereare more and more people
speaking now about how importantthis is in terms of making a
change in humanity.
This is in terms of making achange in humanity, making a

(45:40):
change in the world.
So many of us tend to beoperating from our intellect,
from our mind and, as Imentioned in day one, that's
only going to take you so farand a lot of survival-based
thinking and protective-basedthinking is coming from thinking
and operating from intellectfirst, whereas studies have
shown that your heart actuallypicks up on things before your
mind and intellect does.

(46:01):
And so, if you are operatingfrom a heart based place in your
body in a highly coherent state, you're going to pick up on
things way before somebody who'soperating from a mind and
intellect place only, andthere's also this whole concept
of when you're operating fromthis heart-based place.
You're operating from a placethat's aligned with your purpose

(46:23):
, with your values and this isso important Instead of
operating from a place ofsurvival and needing to try to
grasp onto power and controlexternally, because the truth of
the matter is we are allpowerful beings and your power,
the most important power, comesfrom within.
When you are connected withyourself, when you accept

(46:46):
yourself, when you arecompassionate with yourself,
when you are connected with yourvalues, when you are connected
with your soul purpose, yourvalues, when you are connected
with your sole purpose.
It starts with you so that thenyou can connect with others and
radiate that compassionoutwards towards others, without
judgment, without pressure,without needing to control

(47:08):
anything or anyone.
Because you understand thebigger picture, then you
understand you are not yourthoughts, you are the observer
of them.
You are not your ego, it doesnot control you.
Should you choose not to let itcontrol you, you come to
understand your level of powerwithin yourself because you are

(47:31):
living, breathing stardust,literally, and as so you are a
powerful, key piece of a greatercollective puzzle that includes
us all.
And in the end you see that Iam you and you are me.
This is level four,consciousness, and in this level
of consciousness there is nogood or bad, there is no right

(47:52):
or wrong.
It it all is.
But there is this manner ofheart-based living, connected
with integrity and your valuesand your deepest soul, mission
and purpose, and that's whatguides you.
But survival and fear can keepus from seeing all of these
facets, and it's the survivaland fear that can keep us from

(48:13):
achieving our fullest potential,and especially as highly
sensitive people.
The studies prove that when youdo positively support yourself,
both with your inner emotionalenvironment, through
self-compassion, throughself-acceptance, through
self-nurturing, as well asputting yourself in an external

(48:35):
environment that supports yournervous system, needs that you
will achieve your fullestpotential, that you can be
operating from this place whereyour sensitive gifts are just
that.
They are gifts that you canleverage over and above your
professional skills so that youcan help people in more ways

(48:58):
than just what your professionalskills can deliver.
You can help them throughentrainment and attunement from
your high level of coherence.
You can help them to lift theirown consciousness, because you
have done so with yours.
You can help them through usingyour intuition to help

(49:19):
facilitate even biggerbreakthroughs than logic alone
can deliver.
Can you see how important thisis, not only for you, but for
your business, for yourrelationships, for your family
and for humanity?
And this is why it's soimportant to develop
self-compassion and to acceptyour sensitivity and support it

(49:42):
and nurture it, instead ofreject it or try to mask it or
hide it or push it away or tryto force yourself to be someone
that you're not, force yourselfto try to operate in your
business maybe the way 70 to 80%of the non-sensitive world is
operating in business.
First and foremost, havecompassion for you.

(50:03):
So you can see from my personalstory, this is an example of
the deeper layers that underliewhat's really going on.
Now.
I always start with teachingsome foundational tools like
nervous system regulation.
I didn't get much into nervoussystem regulation in this
particular training series.
I wanted to focus more on thetools to help you to connect

(50:27):
with and understand the languageof your intuition, which I've
shared with you, and gave you atiny snapshot in the first three
days of better understandingyour intuition and trusting it,
so that you a tiny snapshot inthe first three days of better
understanding your intuition.
And trusting it so that you canuse it in your work and so that
you can use it to help you makethe decisions in your life and
in your business that are goingto feel most aligned for you, so

(50:48):
that you can operate in a waythat helps you to feel energized
as opposed to drained, so thatyou can make the decisions that
connect you with work thatlights you up, that you're
passionate about and that makesa real difference in the world,
while also giving you financialsuccess because it pays well.
But, as you can see, there'ssomething deeper here and it's

(51:13):
when the deeper layers areaddressed and supported.
It's like a magic key thatmakes everything unfold and open
up so much more quickly.
And I've given you a tinysnapshot of understanding what I
mean by this with my ownpersonal story.
Right, I tried you know all thedifferent exercises during my
coach training program toconnect with my intuition and it

(51:36):
did help to a degree.
But then, when I did that innerwork, when I connected with my
mother spirit, that's when Ideveloped that self-compassion
for myself and that's what I waslacking before and it was once
I developed that self-compassionfor myself.
It was like a key that unlockeda door, and I see this over and
over again with my clients.

(51:57):
When there are aspects of themthat they don't accept, when
they do lack self-compassion,when there are parts of them
where their protective parts arecontrolling them, when they are
putting inner pressure onthemselves, if they're carrying
guilt or shame, if they are hardon themselves, if they don't
trust themselves, if they'recarrying guilt or shame, if they
are hard on themselves, if theydon't trust themselves, if they

(52:18):
feel like their sensitivity isa flaw or there's something
wrong with them or they feellike there's something about
themselves that they need to fixor hide, then all the nervous
system regulation tools in theworld are only going to get them
so far.
And usually they've come to me,especially in previous
iterations of my work.
They've tried all the things.
They've tried all the stricttherapeutic diets.

(52:41):
They've tried all the medicaltreatments.
They've tried all the herbaltreatments.
They've tried all the detoxes,all the things to help, to
support and help them getcontrol over their chronic
illness symptoms.
When I was working with womenwith autoimmunity and
endometriosis and it was once westarted to explore developing

(53:02):
more compassion for themselves,accepting themselves and letting
go of all that inner pressure.
And the process that I wouldguide them through was the
process that I went through whenI was connecting with my mother
spirit.
It was almost like her and Itogether intuited a whole
process to heal from all thethings that prevented us from

(53:24):
loving and accepting and havingcompassion for ourselves, both
her and me.
And so that process that Iguided people through which I
later decided to call the innerliberation method, because once
I would guide a client throughthis process, they would come
out the other side and theywould tell me that they finally
feel free.

(53:45):
They feel liberated from allthe shackles of inner pressure
and judgment that were holdingthem down, keeping them tied,
holding them back from livingtheir lives the way they wanted
to live it, from enjoying theirlives, and once you liberate
yourself from that, life opensup.
It's like a lock that opens adoor and everything blows open

(54:07):
in magnificent ways.
I've since shifted and pivotedmy work, and now I'm working
with entrepreneurs who arewanting to align their work more
deeply with what they reallywant and to connect more with
their intuition so that they aremaking the decisions that are
aligned for them and to use thatintuition more confidently in

(54:30):
their work.
Nowadays, most of my clientshave already done and gone
through some level of innerhealing and once they come out
the other side whether they'vegone through therapy or worked
with coaches or done other typesof personal development work
they come out the other side andthey see, wow, so much has

(54:51):
opened up for me and I see thatmy business and my work is no
longer aligned with where I amnow compared to where I was
before I did this inner work.
But I always find that there'sstill some levels of maybe lack
of acceptance or inner judgmentor lack of compassion to some
degree right, especially whenquestions like well, who am I to

(55:14):
want to make these changes?
I've already got a successfulbusiness or job.
Who am I to want to make thesechanges just because I want to
enjoy my work more, just becauseI want it to be more aligned
with what I think my purposemight be right, and that also
rings of some lack of compassionfor yourself, because you're
not making the decisions thatfully support who you're here to

(55:37):
be.
And again, as a highlysensitive person, when you make
the decisions to fully supportwho you're here to be and to
fully support all the needs thatcome with being a highly
sensitive person and you supportthem, starting first with your
mindset and how you're treatingyourself and how you're talking

(55:58):
to yourself and how much youaccept yourself for who you are
and what you really want.
Then that's when you thrive andwhen you follow your intuition
to make the decisions to alignyourself to what you truly want.
It's not selfish, it'snecessary.
If you want to make that impactand humanity that you know that

(56:19):
you want to be making, you needto align to yourself, align to
your values, align to yourpurpose, align to what you truly
want and who you truly are, notwhat other people are telling
you that you should be or haveto be.
And it's when you do this workto fully align with yourself and
trust yourself and acceptyourself and have compassion for

(56:40):
that and support yourself inthat that's how you can make the
biggest impact in the world forthe people that you know that
you're here to be serving andthat's how they're going to get
the best results from what youhave to offer.
As you can tell, I'm reallypassionate about all of this and
I could go on for hours aboutthis and I feel like this

(57:00):
episode is already long enough.
I know I'm going to revisitthis topic again in the future.
Some reflection questions foryou.
How is your relationship withyou?
How much compassion do you havefor yourself?
Do you have supportiveself-talk or are you negative
and judgmental towards yourself?
Do you criticize yourself andforce yourself to soldier on in

(57:24):
difficult experiences anddifficult circumstances or in
times when you're starting tofeel overwhelmed or overloaded?
Do you think that possibly yourlevel of self-compassion for
yourself, or lack of, might beimpeding your ability to access
your intuition?
So reflect on those questions.

(57:46):
I suggest you journal aboutthem because when you get it on
paper you can see it from adifferent perspective.
If you see that maybe there'ssome level of compassion that
you could improve, to improveyour inner emotional environment
, to help you thrive even moreas a highly sensitive person,

(58:06):
then hopefully this has maybebeen a helpful perspective shift
for you and shed some light onmaybe a layer and piece in the
puzzle for you to address andwork on so that you can develop
even more self-compassion foryourself, because the more
self-compassion that you have,the more positive inner

(58:27):
supportive environment thatyou're going to provide for
yourself and this is going tohelp you, as a highly sensitive
person, thrive even more, andthis is how you can help others
to your fullest potential.
And if you are seeing thatthere is some light shed on some
layers and some pieces of thepuzzle, then this gives you this

(58:50):
opportunity, because you can'tchange what you can't see.
And if you can see it, then youcan choose to do something
about it.
In this case, maybe you decidethat you choose to develop a
deeper level of self-compassionfor yourself, however you find
is most aligned for you and Iknow, for the clients that I
lead.
I have developed this innerliberation method that I walk my

(59:14):
clients through and guide themthrough.
And I find, for fellow highlysensitive people, especially
highly sensitive people who didgrow up in an unsupportive
environment where they were ledto believe that their
sensitivity was a flaw, thenthis particular method that I
came up with with my motherspirit that helped me unlock

(59:38):
self-compassion and unlock thenext level of my intuition, this
particular method works likemagic for others in similar
situations.
So I'll wrap up today's day fourtraining.
I hope this gave you some foodfor thought and some things to
consider and maybe shed somelight on some things that might

(59:58):
be helpful for you to not onlydeepen your connection with your
intuition, but some things toconsider so that you can really
fully, deeply thrive to yourfullest potential in your life,
in your business and in theimpact that you know that you're
here to provide for humanity.
And if you haven't alreadysigned up for this five-day

(01:00:22):
training series your nextintuitive business breakthrough
I highly suggest that you usethe link in the show notes to
sign up so that you can catch upon all of the other trainings
that come along with this dayfour training of the series,
because they all fit togetherand so when you sign up, you'll

(01:00:42):
receive one email a day for fivedays with a link to each of the
trainings, along with someadditional resources that are
gonna help you move through thetrainings and the exercises in
the trainings.
So that's it for day four, andI look forward to seeing you for
the final day of this trainingseries, tomorrow, day five.
There's going to be someadditional perspective shifts

(01:01:04):
and some wrap up considerationsthat are going to help you take
everything that you've learnedover these four days and help
you to put them into action sothat you can have your next
intuitive business breakthrough.
I'll speak to you then.
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