31| Mom Depression & Negative Thoughts, 3 Mindset Shifts to Stop the Downward Spiral in Minutes!

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Have you ever felt yourself spiraling—frustrated, stuck, or overwhelmed by the demands of motherhood? In this vulnerable episode of Intentional Motherhood, Kelsey Redd shares a personal story of how a simple nap time struggle almost sent her into a downward spiral, and how one powerful mindset shift changed everything in minutes.

Kelsey reflects on her past battle with infertility and depression and how that experience gave her perspective in motherhood today. She introduces three simple mindset shifts—purpose, perspective, and gratitude—that can help moms stop spiraling quickly, in minutes instead of hours or days.
 Learn more here. 

You’ll come away with:
 ✨ A reminder of your why in motherhood—and how to draw strength from it.
✨ A fresh perspective to help you step out of frustration and into peace.
✨ A practical way to use gratitude to shift your mood and mindset instantly.

Kelsey also shares details about her upcoming mini-course designed to help moms break free from negative thought and emotion spirals with simple, practical tools—so you can show up as the mom you want to be.

If you’ve ever felt “stuck in bed” by overwhelm, this episode will encourage you, equip you, and remind you that you are doing an amazing job.
Be in the know as soon as this course drops!  

Episode Transcript

Kelsey Redd (00:10):
Welcome to Intentional Motherhood, the
podcast for amazing moms justlike you who are just trying to
do your best to raise theamazing children that God has
given you and stay sane at thesame time, and hopefully even
find a way to really enjoy allthe aspects of motherhood. I'm

(00:32):
your host, Kelsey Redd, clinicalmental health counselor turned
stay at home mom. And now I feelcalled to help mothers have
information and skills and toolsto be able to be the best
version of themselves that theycan be, because that's how we
are the best moms that we canbe. When we are regulated, when

(00:55):
we are healthy, mentally,physically, spiritually, we can
lead our family from a place ofwholeness and presence and joy
and love. And that creates theenvironment that allows our
children to also thrive.
So today we're going to talkabout something kind of personal

(01:16):
and a little deep, and I hopeyou'll bear with me. So let's
get started. So I have to tellyou a story. There was this day
a few weeks ago where, I don'tknow, I just had a lot on my
plate. There was a lot of stuffI was trying to get done.
I felt like I had a lot ofstress in my life at the moment.

(01:38):
I was probably trying to getsome work done that day. And my
son, who's a little over a yearold, still needs a lot of
support going into nap time. AndI totally take responsibility. I
always say that I have createdmonsters because I do love to
cuddle and nurse my babies tosleep.

(01:58):
And so I don't have a routinewhere I just prepare them for a
nap and then lay them down and Ican walk away. I really rock my
babies to sleep and a lot oftimes my, at least the last two
babies need, how should we say,cuddles during their naps and
night times. So I was trying toput my son to sleep and it was

(02:20):
just one of those nap times thatwas going on and on and I
couldn't sneak away. Anytime Iwould try to unlatch him and
sneak away, roll off the bed, Hewould wake up and start crying
and I had to stay with him andcuddle with him what felt like
forever. And my other kids weredoing who knows what, probably

(02:43):
watching a show or getting intomischief because that's what
they have to do when I'm puttingthe baby to sleep.
And I remember just feeling sofrustrated because I felt like I
have other things I need to dotoday. I have so much to get
done. And I can't, these are thewords that I said in my mind. I
said, I can't just be stuck inbed all day. This is so

(03:04):
frustrating.
I feel like I'm just stuck inthis dark room in bed and I
can't even get out of bed to doanything today. Now that might
not sound like a big deal, butwhen I heard myself say those
words in my mind, I instantlywas brought back to a really
dark time in my life when wewere going through infertility

(03:28):
and I was in a pretty deep anddark depression. And I remember
that there were days, days thatit was really hard to get out of
bed. Days when I was so stuck ingrief and sorrow and depression
that I literally did feelparalyzed to my bed, you know?

(03:54):
And I remember laying in a darkroom, curled up in bed,
overwhelmed by this depression.
And I remember thinking backthen, I can't do anything, I
can't even get out of bed. I'mjust stuck in this dark room in
my bed all day, and I can't doanything else. And that was a

(04:18):
really hard time for me. It'shard. It's actually even harder
to talk about than I expectedthat it would be.
Because that's a scary place tobe when you just don't even feel
like you have any motivation toget up out of bed. So back to
this experience with the nap,when I realized what I had just

(04:41):
said, and what it used to meanto me, and what it used to be
like to be stuck in bed all day,suddenly my perspective changed
so much. And I just rememberthinking in that moment, wait a
second, I would take being stuckin bed, cuddling with my baby,

(05:05):
nursing my baby to sleep, andletting him get a nap a thousand
times over being stuck in bedbecause I'm too depressed to get
out of bed and I have nothingthat I want to live for other
than just being curled up inthis dark room all day. And that
shift in my perspective made allthe difference. And that's what

(05:29):
I want to talk about a littlebit today.
I want to share three mindsetshifts that can help us stop
spiraling quickly in minutesinstead of in hours or days
even. Three, mindset shifts thathelp to put things in their

(05:51):
proper place in our mind so thatwe can get back up, move on, and
go back to functioning hopefullyhappily. Because I don't think
I'm the only one who has thesekinds of negative thoughts or
these frustrations that cansometimes spiral out of control
and then end up taking you out,taking you out of commission for

(06:14):
like the rest of the day orlonger. And I want to help teach
you guys how to not let thathappen. And I actually am
creating a whole course basedaround this concept that goes
deeper into these three mindsetshifts, as well as some of the
context and foundational skillsneeded to kind of manage your

(06:36):
thoughts and your emotions sothat you can stop the spiral
faster.
So the three mindset shifts arefirst tuning back into your
purpose. This is your why. Thisis the thing that reminds you
what all the sacrifices are for.Maybe that's a deeply spiritual
purpose for you, like I feellike it was my calling in life

(07:00):
to be a mother. Or maybe it's amore logistical purpose, like I
love my family and I want toraise good kids and I want them
to have a happy mom.
But wherever it lies on thespectrum for you, knowing your
why, knowing why it is that wesacrifice the things we do as
women and mothers of youngchildren helps us to remember

(07:21):
that, oh yeah, this is all goingto be worth it. It's going to
end at some point, but it's allgoing to be worth it. And that
point brings us to the mindsetshift number two, which is
perspective. This shift takes usout of like catastrophization or
rumination and helps put thingsproperly into the reality, which

(07:43):
is that this is going to pass.This is a moment that's going to
pass.
Not only the like actual momentthat you're in, like I was in
with the nap time, this is goingto end within the next thirty to
sixty minutes tops, but even thestage of life that we're in,
right? These years are going topass quickly, so quickly, and we

(08:05):
won't be dealing with the kindof exhaustion and emotional and
mental strains that aresometimes on us as a mom of
young kids. So the perspectiveis kind of like the lens through
which we view our situation. Andwhen we can recognize that we
are proactive and we are makingintentional choices about our

(08:28):
behaviors and our thoughts, thenwe can move past the rumination
and depression spiral that cansometimes take over us. And the
last mindset shift is gratitude.
That was the key for me when Ialmost went down this depression
spiral, when I recognize thatI'm complaining about the same

(08:51):
thing that I prayed and longedand was sorrowful over for so
long. I get to lay in bed withmy baby. I get to finally have
the thing that I prayed allthose years for. And that
gratitude shifted everything andmade me think, Oh, never mind.

(09:11):
I'm not upset about thisanymore.
I'm just so grateful that I getto do this. So again, those
three mindset shifts arepurpose, perspective, and
gratitude. And if you'rethinking like, sounds familiar,
I get into these negativespirals that sometimes do take

(09:32):
me hours or days to get out ofbecause my emotions get taken
over and my thoughts go crazylike a runaway train. I need
help with this. Then my new minicourse is going to be just for
you.
And it would be a great idea toclick on the link in the show
notes below to get on the waitlist so that you can be the

(09:54):
first to be notified about thatcourse, or to click the link in
my bio creating. Intentional.Mothers on Instagram and sign up
to be notified. For less thanthe cost of one therapy session,
I'm going to teach you, I'mgoing to give you information
that you need to understand torecognize how mental and

(10:17):
emotional patterns work. And I'mgoing to give you skills and
tools to work through thesekinds of negative patterns, as
well as go more into thesemindset shifts so that you can
quickly stop the spiral and getback to being the mom that you
want to be.
If you're excited about this, orif you can think of another mom

(10:40):
who might benefit from this kindof information, please leave a
review and send it to a friend,share it on your social media,
tell anyone you can think of sothat we can have more and more
moms joining our amazingcommunity. I feel called to help
moms to find joy in motherhood,to recognize what a blessing and

(11:01):
privilege this journey is. So ifyou feel like you're not
enjoying motherhood, pleasereach out to me. DM me on
Instagram, email me at creating.Intentional.
Mothersgmail dot com so that wecan connect and we can find a
way to teach you what you needto know, create an action plan

(11:22):
so that you can get back tothriving in motherhood. I'm so
grateful you spent this timewith me and remember, you are
doing an amazing job. Until nexttime, I am cheering you on. And
I'll see you in the next episodeof Intentional Motherhood.