Episode 11 - Parent Playbook – How to Be Data Driven

Know the facts to help you make good decisions

This Audio Journal series focuses on what it takes to coach your family through the Opioid Crisis with the right game plan, a parent playbook, an understanding of your opponent and help from your “assistants” when it’s called for.  This episode will focus on the value of analyzing the data to understand the facts so you can make the right play calls.

Nick Saban at Alabama implemented a GPS tracking system to monitor his player’s activity in practice so he could better predict if his team’s practice strategy wore his players out or kept them ready to go, particularly in post-season play.  He relied on data as much as his experience and instincts to create the right practice plan. 

Unfortunately, technology was not there when my daughter Laura started going off the rails in high school, using drugs, and engaging in very risky behavior. So, what type of systems, data, and facts do you need to have at your disposal to make better decisions on behalf of your child to protect them?

Answer the question that is most critical. Is my child using drugs?  I’ve talked to quite a few parents who think their kids are in trouble, caught them drinking or smoking pot, and suspect they are doing more. But they’ve never drug tested them to confirm what they suspect.  A drug test may show that they did indeed smoke pot or a breathalyzer can confirm how much alcohol they have been drinking.  So, if that data comes back confirming what you suspect don’t hesitate to ground your kid, let them know that more testing is likely, take their car keys away and make sure they get and understand why this is a big deal.

However, your decisions as a parent might be entirely different if the test reveals that they are doing something more dangerous like testing positive for cocaine, meth, opioids or heroin.  You may need to go above and beyond grounding them and taking their car.  The bottom line is that you need to know the facts to make intelligent decisions.

Drug testing kits are inexpensive, easy to find at any local drug store or online, and easy to use.  Just follow some simple guidelines.  Make them random.  Research the potential countermeasures your kid may use to fool the test.  And most importantly, never apologize for using a test that could save their life and give you the data you need. 

Monitor how your child is connecting with others electronically.  Cell phones and laptops are now common tools that most middle and high schoolers use obsessively.  When they are used appropriately, they allow parents to stay in touch with your kids and allow kids to learn more about the world around them.  But those same tools can also be a way for kids to get into trouble.  My daughter used her phone to coordinate sneaking out in the middle of the night to smoke pot on the golf course, connect with high-school seniors who were selling her vodka she used during school and later with her drug dealers.

So, let’s get the facts when it comes to understanding if your kids’ electronics are an asset or a liability.  Cell phone have parental controls so you can disable them at night.  You can install software to monitor texting.   The same applies to tablets and laptops.  Don’t hesitate to use software to monitor keystrokes so you can know what your kids search for, who they message, and what they are posting on social media.  And don’t forget to disable or take away the laptop before you go to bed because it’s also an engine to message their friends.

Verify that your kid is where they say they are.  When my daughter Laura was in high school, she let me drop her off at school only to leave through the back door.  She had me take her to sports practice only to leave with a friend.  She told me that she was at dad’s house