In this week's episode, I had the pleasure of speaking with Claire Uncaphor: Intuitive and Transformational Life Coach and Energy Healer. Claire has a wealth of wisdom, training, and real-life experience to offer her clients, helping them get to the root cause of their emotional pain, limiting beliefs, and negative thought patterns to experience inner freedom, reclaim their authenticity, and experience more joy in their lives. Claire's empathic, intuitive, and systemic approach is reflective of her own commitment to live her life with authenticity, presence, and unconditional love. Enjoy, and much love.
Show Notes:
To learn more about Clair Uncaphor's work and offerings, go to her website at www.claireuncapher.com
Follow Claire on Instagram @claire.uncapher
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Learn more about Kristen O'Meara here
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Kristen O'Meara (00:00):
Hello everyone and welcome to Intuition Talks.
(00:03):
I am Kristen O'Meara and I amhere with a new friend, Claire
Unkefer, and I'm so excited tohave met you, Claire.
You are sharing such a uniqueWay of working with people and
we're going to dive into thatreally soon, but I, I really
(00:25):
appreciate all that you offer,which is working with people to
get to the root cause of theirsuffering of what is limiting
perhaps their self perception,how they're seeing the world
and, tapping into the.
(00:48):
Limitless power that we allhave.
So Claire, why don't you justshare a little bit about who you
are and.
And how that is coming out intothe world from you.
Sure.
Thank you.
Thank you for having me.
Um, yeah, a lot of this is basedon my own experience.
And then when I started workingwith other people, uh, to help
(01:12):
them, you know, hurdle the samejourney or help them along the
path, I started noticing.
And so the work that I do todayis based on kind of the step by
step, like journey that I'venoticed.
I didn't, I don't think I reallynoticed it from the outside that
there was a pattern to it.
But when I started working withpeople, it became like the same
(01:35):
thing over and over again.
And so there's like this type ofwoman and man, but really this
type of woman where, um, youknow, I struggled with
depression for years.
Some people are just like nothappy, but they don't know why.
There's really no reason.
Um, and a lot of people willsay, oh, well, I know it's
(01:58):
probably my trauma from mychildhood or my self worth or
whatever, you know, they, theythink they have a pretty good
idea.
And we, and we usually do.
But, um, we, we do all thethings we do and we, you and I
were talking before you hitrecord that I'm not anti
medicine or anti therapy, butthat doesn't always work for
(02:20):
everyone.
And I'm a nurse and I've, I'vebeen on both sides of that
seeing, you know, this is whattraditional medicine has to
offer and, and people do it, butit, it often doesn't give them
the relief.
That they're looking for or theor the long lasting relief that
(02:41):
they're looking for Yeah, andthey'll find themselves back in
this space and How the hell didI get here?
I thought it was better blahblah blah and um I help people
uncover the root cause of Oftheir depression or anxiety or
unhappiness or whatever it isthrough subconscious work.
(03:02):
And, and I don't mean likeyou're fully awake, you're not
hypnotized.
I just know how to help peopleaccess their subconscious minds.
It's kind of like a backdoor.
And I teach people how to do itthemselves because the answers
are All within you and that'swhy I was sitting across from a
(03:24):
therapist for all those yearsand I Wasn't making headway was
because I didn't even haveaccess to the information that
we should have been talking totalking about.
Isn't that true?
And I, I, I hate to interrupt.
No, no, no.
Yeah.
It's so true because I wastelling, um, you earlier and
folks, um, I've probably sharedin the past that I spent years
(03:46):
training to be a therapist andI'd had a lot of my own therapy.
Um, and of course there aredifferent types of, of talk
therapy and, and I think it'shelpful.
To a point, particularly forpeople who haven't had that
mirroring or that person tolisten to their story because
stories are so important.
(04:08):
Um, but after a while, uh, itjust seems that.
At least the therapists that Iknow, they seem to want to go
access different ways of workingwith clients because they see it
too.
So the soul has not beenconditioned.
So we can go through in our mindand, and try to, you know, get
(04:32):
rid of those habits or, orwhatever, but we have to be able
to find the answers in the waysthat work for us because not,
they're not necessarily theanswers of the ways, you know,
that other people have that aretelling us that are going to
work, even though they might begreat.
Does that make sense?
Yeah.
And I, I, the question for me isI was like, don't make, you
(04:55):
don't need to make me feelbetter.
Please help me heal.
Yes.
I don't need you to help me feelbetter.
Please help me heal.
How do I do that?
Right.
How do I do that?
And I think it's amazing.
I really challenge people todrop that story.
In fact, I tell people at thebeginning of our work together
(05:16):
that we are on a treasure huntand that I know what I'm looking
for and, and, and they're goingto love what we find, but we
have to kind of step out of thestory.
And so people will start goingdown that rabbit hole of telling
me their life story and.
And, and, and then I'll justkind of redirect them because
I'm, I'm looking for certainwords that will, Oh, there we
(05:39):
go.
That's where we need to go.
You know, but, um, I love it.
Yeah.
But it's, it's how to, don'tmake me feel better.
How do I heal?
And I challenge people to dropthe story and also consider.
Like, what would it be like forme to give up my identity as a
depressed person?
(06:00):
My identity as an anx, you know,having anxiety, because an
anxious feeling isn't bad.
There's, there's reasons why wehave anxiety.
Our body and mind are trying totell us something's off, and
we're not paying attention, andit's actually super awesome to
learn it.
How to tap into that wisdom, butwe've been told, Oh, anxiety is
(06:25):
bad.
Let's try to eliminate thosesymptoms, but anxiety and
depression are not the problem.
They're the, they're thesymptoms of the problem.
And so when we go after what thereal problem is, it's usually,
and how we do that through thesubconscious work.
Is we go back, you know, we justasked the mind, whatever the
(06:48):
inquiry is, when was the, whenwas this wound, did this wound
happen basically?
Like, when is the first time Iever experienced this or what
belief did I form that kind ofsolidified this way of being,
or, you know, and we'll often,uh, the mind will go back to
some sort of.
Memory, scene, and it's notscary, and it's not, it doesn't
(07:11):
even matter, it's like, sodoesn't matter, your mind is
playing charades, it's tellingyou a story, but, um, it'll be
something like, I'm standing inthe driveway, and I'm playing
ball with my friends, you know,and I'm like, okay, you know,
and.
But then it's what happens isthey get to see that their
parents were arguing in thehouse.
And what they started, they'reabsolutely able to tune into
(07:34):
that like little seven year oldversion of themselves.
And when I asked them, what areyou concluding right now?
And like good things don'thappen to me and won't happen to
me or I'm not good enoughbecause if we were happy and I
was good enough, then theywouldn't be arguing.
It's my fault.
They're arguing or it'll,they'll, they'll form this like
(07:59):
earth shattering belief that.
They can start to see thatthroughout their lives.
They always held that like Idon't matter.
Yeah, I'm not lovable.
I'm not good enough I'minsignificant.
I have to earn love.
I'm not just inherently lovableI have to earn it through my
actions and being good enoughand all that and Once we heal
(08:20):
that you feel different becauseyou are different.
First, I just want to say it'sso wonderful about your work
because you're not, feeding themind with that story, which is
so great.
So when you, when you don't givethe mind what it wants in terms
of going back to the story, itkind of, Force isn't the right
(08:40):
word, but like you said, itredirects the consciousness or
the, uh, of the self awarenessto there's something else
outside of that story, you know,to, to unpack, like you could
think that, Oh, I'm always goingto be alone or I don't feel this
self worth.
But then when you go and try tofigure out, like you said, the
(09:01):
root cause, then that opens adoorway and another doorway and
another doorway and anotherdoorway, like you said, to heal.
Um, Because inherently, Ibelieve we can all heal
ourselves.
Yes.
And you being the guy that youare, because we're not trained
as children to understand how toheal heartbreak or to forgive or
(09:26):
to be still, or to, to developthe tools that we all inherently
have to heal ourselves.
It's such a wonderful gift thatyou're offering to guide people
to, you know, you're more than,than what you're telling
yourself every day.
And it really brought to mindthat we all need to have bouts
of.
(09:46):
What we might think isdepression, although there is
clinical depression for sure,but there are times of sadness
that I think that We need tohonor because we might not have
grieved something that, thatwe're, you know, becoming aware
of.
And I don't think that we haveenough time in our modern life
(10:09):
to feel maybe some anxiety, ormaybe that's our intuition
trying to tell us something orto feel some sadness.
And I think there's this selfhelp industry that's kind of
coming with this message of.
You know, all of these feelings,you know, you need to be happy.
You need to be happy andhappiness comes and goes.
Yeah.
(10:29):
I'll give you, I feel called toshare this.
What's happening in my lifepersonally this week.
Um, I think probably a therapistand psychiatrist might look at
my situation this week and belike, Oh my gosh, you're
depressed.
Let's up your medication.
But what's happening this weekis my oldest son is graduating
from high school and gettingready to leave, to go to
(10:49):
college.
And.
Um, I'm happy for him.
I'm having a very interestingemotional response to it.
It feels like grief.
It feels like, it feels likegrief and like a loss.
And because we've already kindof lost in he, you know, he's
graduating, he's got a full timejob.
He's moving away.
Like it's no longer like, Ican't just assume he's available
(11:13):
Sunday for dinner.
Now I have to say, Hey son, I'mWhat's going on in your life?
Are you available for us?
And so it's a huge transition.
And so I've been breaking intotears, um, at random times all
week and not very motivated.
I was in my sweats yesterday onMother's Day and my husband was
(11:35):
concerned about me.
And I said, I'm not depressed.
I'm experiencing and processingsome grief and loss and sadness,
and it's very important that Iallow it to be, and I know, good
thing I know how to move it and,but I'm allowing it.
And because it's appropriate,right?
(11:56):
And so, but I think with myhistory in the past, With like
breaking down into tears, Ithink I would have been like,
Oh, I better call somebody andlike go on medication.
But really, no, my body'sprocessing totally normal.
And, and you're right, there isclinical depression.
And you and I kind of talkedbeforehand.
I've had both postpartumdepression and just clinical
(12:18):
depression.
And, um, and like, I want yourlisteners to know like severe
depression.
Like, I've been there where Ididn't want to live anymore.
I've been there where I couldn'tstop crying and I didn't know
why.
I've been there where smallthings were hard and I just
(12:40):
would break down.
And, and, but the, the, andthat's not the time, by the way,
to do this work.
Yeah.
Get, get.
Yourself better place, you know,get on your medication and see
your therapist, get yourself toit.
Cause it does take a certainamount of energy to do this
(13:01):
work, but the root cause is onlythe first piece we talked about,
you know, your podcast is calledintuition talks.
I started noticing that one ofthe biggest reasons we're
unhappy is because we don'tlive.
In alignment with our intuition,but the way I call it
authenticity, we don't, wearen't free to choose, make
(13:27):
choices and to be who we reallyare, our essence, right?
Um, and the message lovinglyfrom people that love us is be
you up to a certain point.
Be you as long as it doesn'tupset, disappoint or
inconvenience me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then, so we've learned tokind of mold ourselves to other
(13:53):
people's satisfactions andexpectations, right?
But that's not who we are.
And so part of the healingprocess is, is, is really
Embracing who you are perks andall like, wow, you know, what is
the, my, my spirit's verydisruptive, but I consider that
(14:14):
and I would got in trouble forit my whole life.
And I feel like God gave methat.
Yeah.
Um, I feel like that's, it's aspiritual quality.
It's.
Yeah.
Because you're speaking likeabout the shadow in a way,
right?
So, um, and I, I'm sorry tointerrupt you.
I just, I love what you saidabout that.
(14:36):
Um, and I don't know, tell me,um, if you got the feedback
growing up that, oh, this is anequality that's really
acceptable or, um, somethingthat, uh, you may be suppressed.
So, I think that.
The more intuitive developmentwork we do.
And the more we understand whowe are, we can learn, or we
(14:59):
learn, or we see that, Oh, thisaspect of me, this flamboyant or
eccentric aspect is a gift.
It's not something that I needto keep suppressing.
Cause I think that can causeanxiety and depression too.
Cause we're not, like you said,being authentic are, we know
when we're not being authentic.
And I think that can have itsown set of symptoms.
(15:21):
Well, yeah, like I always jokearound.
I said, my body won't let mebetray myself.
Like that's where the anxietyand the unhappiness and
everything comes in.
And it's because I've said yes,when I meant no or no minute
when I meant when I meant yes.
And so, and it's, you're right.
It's, it's about you lovingyourself.
(15:42):
And then once you can, and notjust, I'm not talking
affirmations.
It's a really incredibleprocess.
I'm not talking, you know,Intellectually, we know what we
should do.
I'm talking about at the levelof your nervous system in your
bones, really loving yourselfand accepting yourself.
(16:03):
Then if someone else doesn'taccept you.
You don't make it mean anythingabout you.
It means it might mean theydon't prefer you, but that
doesn't even matter to youbecause you know, you, you tell
you the story you tell yourselfis, well, they just don't get
me.
That's fine.
I'm gettable.
(16:23):
Um, next, you know, but youdon't.
Take it in like you've probablytaken it in your whole life and
and what that has made us do Ialways joke that we all have
like a cover photo on our lives,right or on us.
We have a cover photo We havelike we call them social masks
or whatever you want to call itBut when you can take that off
(16:46):
And be like, listen, this is me.
Not all relationships survivethat shift.
Actually.
It's really.
Yeah.
I've, I've gone through so many,I've shed so many skins in my,
my healing journey.
Friends have come and go.
It's, it's interesting.
And it's, I can be a hard part,but yeah, it's, it's, um, and,
(17:07):
and being careful to not makethat mean, um, I should just
tuck that right back in.
Yeah.
Um, it's just, it's just.
It's okay.
It's the shifting the naturalshifting that occurs through the
healing process and you know, itreally is Allowing what needs to
leave your life to leave yourlife and letting what needs to
(17:29):
come in, come in.
And then there's this, I call itthe uncomfortable void.
There's a void when you let goand something new is coming, but
hasn't come.
And there's like this void, justkind of like surrendering and
all as well and loving yourselfand trusting.
And that's when life gets, um,dare I word they use magical.
(17:52):
Yeah.
And yeah, when you can really,and really tune in with yourself
and it's fascinating to me,Kristen, and I'm sure you get
this because you teachintuition, how many people don't
know how they feel about thingsor what makes them happy.
You ask the question, what doyou just, what does, does your
(18:13):
spirit love and it just kind oflook at you confused, you know?
So it's about getting to knowyourself again too.
Yes.
And I, um, I've actually, it'sreally funny.
I've reconnected with my sevenyear old self this week because
I've gotten a little serious andwhen I was a little girl, I
(18:34):
would wear these really fancydresses because I was the only
girl out of four boys, four boysand one girl.
So I got all the cute dresses,but I was a tomboy and playing
with my brothers.
So I would play outside barefootin these beautiful dresses.
And.
just carefree and happy.
(18:57):
And so I have spent time withher, um, this week in my
meditations.
And it was actually, you know, Ihad a little moment with her
where I, I, I said, I don't evenknow how to be like you anymore.
And she said, I'll teach you.
Oh, so it's, it's, it's just,you know, it's, it's not that I
(19:20):
would consider myself.
I've healed myself fromdepression and anxiety.
And I help people understand theroot cause of their depression
and anxiety and where, why they,the how, where, why, and when
they ever started to feel thosefeelings, what was going on.
It doesn't even have to besomething as much as anxiety and
depression.
(19:41):
You know, a lot of people, womenthat come see me have control
issues.
Yes.
And we'll take them.
I'll ask the mind to show us,Hey, where did that ever come
from?
And it will take us to somerandom scene, not even a super
traumatic scene from theirchildhood, where something was
out of control.
I've had one woman, she wentback and, um, her cousin, An
(20:05):
aunt were in a car accident ontheir street and they brought
them into the house and all sheremembers is all the blood and
she thought her cousin, who washer best friend, was going to
die.
And so this is not safe, right?
This is.
The world isn't safe.
The world isn't safe, right?
And, um, another time I had aclient go back and she was at
(20:29):
the grocery store with her dadand they got locked out of their
car and it was winter and therewere no cell phones and they
couldn't get ahold of her mom.
And so she started and her daddidn't come for her, not because
he was a horrible person, justbecause he was trying to
probably figure it out.
Right.
And she remembers being cold andnot.
(20:51):
Knowing when and if help wascoming and she was like five and
so the mind goes, I know, Idon't like this feeling of being
out of control.
So.
So to experience this again,we're just going to be in
control of everything in chargeof everything and that's, that's
a great plan, right?
(21:11):
Um, fast forward to, you know,30s and they're in their 30s and
40s.
It's not a great plan.
It makes you miserable.
You don't really like thataspect of yourself.
Other people don't like thataspect of yourself, right?
Yeah.
And it's, it's just a programthat continued to run just like
the unlovable program continuedto run.
(21:32):
It is a program.
And you know, I call it like inthis book, um, I book that I've
written that it's coming out inthe fall.
I call it, I had todifferentiate the mind because
the mind You know, there aredifferent aspects of it.
I, I believe.
So we've got like the lower mindor the ego and the higher mind
that can, the higher mind canhold like non linear thought,
(21:54):
curiosity, objectivity.
It can link to and accept theunknown, but the lower mind, the
ego personality, whatever youwant to call it, um, When there
has been like a significantthreat to survival, like the,
the five year old in wintertime, as you know, it will, it
will create a program of thereare, I'm going to put us in the
(22:18):
safe box and we're going totravel in it.
I just like to try to challengepeople about labels because.
You know, another little boy,same thing.
He, and this is a teenager, um,he was struggling after, uh, an
act of violence at his school, areally horrible act of violence.
(22:39):
And he was struggling andstarted having anxiety and
didn't want to go to school.
Didn't want to like, Go anywhereanymore and appropriately so the
parents were concerned took himto the pediatrician pediatrician
sent him to a psychiatristpsychiatrist put him on medicine
sent him to a therapist.
Let's talk about this anxiety.
Now we've got an anxietydisorder for the rest of our
life.
Right, right, right.
And May and maybe like yeah,like did I didn't work with this
(23:02):
little boy I just the story justlike struck me because I was
like, oh my god, he's gonna growup Managing my anxiety when his
response was appropriate to whathappened Yes, his mind.
Well, you know like he got stuckin it, but his his mind was like
Wow.
I could just go to school andjust something really bad could
(23:24):
happen and hit me from the sideand I wouldn't see it coming.
The world isn't safe.
Right.
And so I know I've got a greatidea at that lower mind.
Let's just not go anywhere.
Then we're safe.
Yes.
Yes.
So that's why I love Theintuitive development piece and
the mindfulness, if you want tocall it that, cause it's, you
(23:47):
know, it is what it is, butsometimes I don't like even the
term mindfulness because when Iwas running a wellness center at
a high school, they were like,Oh, mindfulness, whatever.
But really, if you just talkabout bringing your awareness to
the present moment and however,through whatever practice you
want to use and.
Use the opportunity to connectwith the body.
(24:11):
Like you're talking about withthe nervous system and having
that validation that yes, thatwas a really horrible experience
at school, you know, validate,yes, some confirmation
validation.
And of course you're scared.
Every person's different.
So maybe that.
That child or that teenager, Idon't, how old is he?
(24:34):
He was 14, 14, you know, we'reall so different, you know, I, I
would only imagine that it'sokay to be home for a period of
time, you know, they're there,you know, connect with animals,
you know, and if medication isthe only route.
To, to help him resource or helphim in that moment.
That's fine too.
But there are other ways, likeyou said, to heal and we want to
(25:01):
move.
So, and I think this goes backto making space to grieve,
making space to be sad, makingspace to be anxious because
there are other parts of us thatare telling us that, that it can
heal.
But when we're rushing becausewe're anxious parents or we're
(25:21):
anxious.
In general, we really love ourchild.
We really want to help ourchild.
But when there's this big rushto get them into the doctor, get
them on meds, get that label.
It's just, sometimes I feel likewe just need to take a step
back.
Yeah, it's, it's, um, it'sallowing yourself to just like,
and you know, but I explained toclients, you're going to want to
(25:44):
be up here telling me aboutthings.
And I'm going to ask you aquestion.
You're going to think about it.
I need you to drop down and justlet the answer drop in or bubble
up and, and it's beautiful whathappens.
And then I'll even say, Oh,you've, you've, you've come
back.
You know, cause that's theproblem.
We're all smart.
(26:05):
We can't intellectualizeourselves out of this.
Unfortunately, that's the thingthat I wish the self help
industry would understand isthat you can't, we, you cannot
affirmation your way.
And I do affirmations, butthere's, you have to feel it in
your body.
(26:26):
You have to, you know, how likesomeone tells you something,
you're like, yeah, that's truth.
But you feel it in your heart,in your body.
Yeah, and so the client is notgoing to heal until they have
that experience themselvesrelated to what's going on with
them.
They have to come to this point.
(26:47):
That's my job, is to get themthere.
They have to come to this pointthat they're like, My God.
Oh my God, I get it now.
I, I, I didn't see it before andI had one client say, it's like
there was this door in the walland it was there the whole time,
but I didn't know it was therebecause it was a secret door.
And you just went, look, there'sa door.
(27:08):
And I went, Oh, that's cool.
And I just, that was so simple,but it, it really is.
It's not going subconscious.
People are afraid ofsubconscious.
It's not going to be anythingyou're surprised about because
the subconscious mind is soclosely related to intuition.
And that's why I don't, I havethree certifications in
hypnotherapy.
(27:28):
I don't hypnotize peopleanymore.
I teach people how to get tothat space that they are.
Talking to their body, talkingto their mind, trying to get
information, understanding, youknow, understanding, and then
teaching them to do this for alife skill.
Yes.
(27:49):
Right?
Like, and what's right for me?
And then again, people will tryto pop up into their brains.
No, no, no, no.
What's right for me?
What do I want to do?
And the answer will drop down orbubble up.
Yeah.
That's the easiest way I candescribe it.
And it will be usually simple.
(28:11):
Do you?
Yes.
And it's usually for me, whenI've had it for myself, it's
usually like a couple of wordsand it's always simple.
It's not complex.
And when you know it's reallysuper complex, it's coming from
the mind.
Yeah.
I tell people it's a, it's gonnabe a very simple word or phrase.
And that's, that's how it comes.
That's how, and, but thenthere's some things we do that
they can kind of like get moreinformation.
(28:31):
But the first thing that comesis a very simple word or phrase
and it drops down or bubbles up.
And I love the look on people'sfaces when they realize, Oh my
God, there is something there,you know.
So you, I love what you offer.
You offer, I believe twodifferent programs.
I mean, you have a whole suiteof offerings and I want you to,
(28:53):
to share what those are, butthey're two in particular.
Yeah.
So, um, oh, the inside outhealing method is, and I do that
one on one with people, or Ihave a self paced program that
people can go through and do thework themselves.
Um, I just have all the tools inone place and, um, The inside
(29:16):
out healing method is the fivesteps to go through to to really
Know yourself in it.
It's the root cause Authenticitylearning to tolerate people
being disappointed You know inyour choices, um communication.
That was another surprising onebut it it's fine if we're happy
(29:39):
and healed or getting there orlearning to like, um, Be
ourselves, but if we are stayingin patterns of reactivity with
people in our lives That's No,no.
Bueno.
So we, yeah, we, we unlearn somecommon ways of communicating and
we learn some techniques.
(29:59):
And it's, and this was trial anderror.
My husband had come up withthese over the past five years
because we decided we were notgoing to do it the way we had
been doing it in our previousmarriages and it didn't get us,
you know, so we were, we weregoing to do it differently.
So just relearning these simplecommunication strategies,
shedding skins, learning how toshift identities, how to talk,
(30:22):
how to talk to the worst partsof you, how to get, you How to
get that part of you tounderstand that it's now safe.
It's now, you know, it's, I justdid this with somebody this
week, you know, we talked to apart of her that has armored up.
(30:43):
Yes.
He's armored up over, you know,and it's okay to put the, the
armor down.
Yeah.
It's okay.
You survived it.
You know, you needed it then,but you don't need it now.
And we, but we had to have aconversation with the part of
her.
And that part of her had to feellike, Oh, thank God, you know,
(31:05):
cause this has been a lot tocarry and really feel like it
was given permission to like,not be anymore.
And then the last thing is thebody speak method, which is, um,
it was a way I worked withclients and their bodies and
their nervous systems and torelease stuck emotions and to
(31:26):
get the root cause.
And then I'm, I simplified itinto 10 steps.
Uh, so that it could berepeatable.
And I teach people that, um, andit's basically, you know, the
body speak method, discoveringwhat your body already knows
and, and just connecting you tothat, your body, and that's,
that's just like a course, um,and you can do it with me or.
(31:48):
Or a course on, um, yeah, justconnecting to where, where the
answers are, how to get your owninner guidance, um, how to get
the, all that wisdom, you know,what is my anxiety trying to
tell me?
What is, you know, what ishappening right now?
I'm triggered.
Why?
What's happening?
(32:09):
And how do I fix it?
And how to get those answers.
And so that is for me been thebiggest thing that's been the
game changer because lifehappens, life will go on, and
that's a tool that I can grab toto feel better so that I don't
(32:30):
have to carry emotions around.
Oh, I love that.
So powerful.
Yeah.
Cause I'm a feeler And, andjust, yeah, just that's a lot of
what's a trick when we saytriggered it's, there's these
unprocessed, unfully digestedExperiences and or emotions that
(32:55):
are sitting in your, whateveryou want to call it in your
field, in your body, in yournervous system.
And all we're doing is releasingthem.
And that's the healing process.
We're not regurgitating it.
You're not, I'm not, I don'tcare about how your week was.
I do care about how your weekwas, but, but we're, we're,
we're healing here.
And, and it's really funny.
People are so, your body wheelwill decide what's next.
(33:22):
Yeah.
There's no agenda.
Um, I worked with somebody andwe booked the appointment and
then for two days she likecouldn't sleep and her heart
started palpitating and I'veheard that and that's her body
getting ready to purgesomething.
Yes.
Yeah.
And that's really interestingtoo where we have different
perspectives like you're, you'rebringing up right now about the
(33:43):
body.
You know, different perspectivesthat we would perhaps without
that awareness or without that,um, body awareness or
relationship with the body withthat sleepless nights and
preparing for, you know, thesession, we may Just say to
ourselves, Oh, this is a badthing.
You know, I need to medicatethis or this isn't okay.
(34:06):
And it could be excitement.
The spirit and the body might belike, I'm really excited to
like, get rid of this stuff.
Yeah.
You know, there's, there couldbe all sorts of things.
And I think we're, we, um, Wethink that all uncomfortable
feelings and experiences arenegative.
And I just.
Yeah.
Well, she, she, it's notcomfortable.
(34:26):
Right.
And I told her it's, you know,it's, she was a mom and she is a
mom of two.
I said, it's like when you hadyour babies, it wasn't so
comfortable in the deliveryroom.
Was it when you were birthingthat emotion, right?
That baby, when you werebirthing that experience where
we're getting it out of yourbody, right.
It's not very comfortable.
(34:47):
It might, it might make us losea night's sleep.
It might make my heart flutter,but then I'm, I'm the doula.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I help you deliver that, andthen here's your baby, you know,
like, now, oh my god, now I feelso much better.
But the, the actual Um, youknow, and I had a, a business
(35:07):
coach tell me never tell peoplethat it's gonna be work.
Ever.
They're not gonna sign up forthat.
And I was like, then they'renot, then they're just not
ready.
Because when you're miserableenough, when you're miserable
enough, where I was and wherepeople are when they come see
me, I joke, I call myself thelast resort practitioner.
(35:27):
They're like, what do you wantme to do?
I'll do anything.
I don't care.
Because a, a little of my work,you know, that intuitive world
is a little, your work isdifferent.
And lawyers, navy seals, youknow, real people that you would
never think would like try totap into their, like, what, what
do you, I, I'm miserable.
(35:48):
What do I gotta do to feelbetter?
Mm-Hmm.
if you are not in that space.
Good.
Yeah.
But for the people that are, forthe people that are in that
space, and for me, when I got tothat point, I remember thinking
there's got to be somethingbetter than this.
And I, I felt a sense of angerand power that I wanted to turn
(36:14):
around with my medical sword andsay, let's do this shit.
For me, I know that it was sothat I could help other people.
So I had to show them the wayout.
So, so that I could sit withthem and really get how they're
feeling like I, I get it likeI've been there.
I don't, you know, I, and I knowthat there's a way to, to
(36:39):
better, you know, and it's not,it doesn't have to be.
I'm going to ditch everythingI'm doing and do this, but, and
I tried everything.
It was so desperate.
I, I literally tried and thereare so many healing modalities
that are so wonderful that I wasso hopeful were going to help
me.
And nothing would make itbetter, nothing would make it
(37:01):
better until for me, I foundthis kind of relationship with
my, with my mind and my bodythat is like, what do I need to
know here in order to heal?
And for you, you said, you kindof touched on it, it might be,
but like when I'm going throughsomething difficult, I seriously
say, what am I supposed to belearning here?
(37:23):
Yes.
Yeah.
I never liked the answer.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
And it's almost like, God, I'vebeen through enough.
Like what am I supposed to belearning?
Yeah.
But there is always something.
And you know, you know what itis for me every time learning
how to let go even more, evenmore, even more, surrendering,
(37:49):
trusting more.
And for me, it's loving myselfmore.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Accepting yourself.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Don't make.
What are you making things mean?
Right.
Like, just like I said, like I'mbursting out in tears and having
what might look like adepressive episode, but I'm just
(38:09):
like, you know, being a sad mamawho's getting ready to lose her
18 year old to the world.
And he is like ready.
He's gone.
You know, like he's not, I'm notsure he's coming back.
He's just.
And that might be like the wholefreshman year.
I mean, like, and that's okay.
(38:29):
Like we need to honor the factthat my gosh, your baby's
leaving the nest.
Yeah.
I have three more.
So we use humor a lot in ourhouse.
And so my, my daughter's like,it's like, you know, you have
three of them, three more likefine.
You know, like just, it's fine.
(38:50):
Just spend more time with us.
You're going to be hugging themso much.
Like, yeah, but what are you,what are you telling yourself?
What story are you tellingyourself right now about what
you're experiencing?
You know, and, and, and anotherone big one, I think for women,
that's so important is, um,committing to say no when they
(39:13):
mean no and yes, when they mean,yes.
And, and that's like a mantra ofmine because I'm really bad at
that sometimes, even thismorning at the gym, it was
really funny.
I was at the gym and I was onthe rower for two minutes,
warming up before my, beforelifting some weights.
And I, I had AirPods in, hellopeople.
(39:34):
I don't want to talk to anybody.
You know, I just want to be hereand do my work and leave, and
this is my time.
And this guy comes up to me.
And he goes, would you like somefeedback on your rowing?
Oh, no.
He's like, let me show you howto make this more efficient.
And in my mind, I'm like, AndI'm like, I said, sure.
Uh, but in my mind, I'm like,no, I don't want feedback on my
(39:56):
rowing.
I just did it to warm up and toget, you know, to work out.
And I had, I've been working outfor years and years and years.
And he's like, well, I rode andcall, you know, I'm like, I
don't freaking care, you know,but in, so that's inside what
I'm feeling, but I didn't letthat social mask, that cover
(40:17):
photo go.
I went, sure.
And I was nice.
and sat there and listened tothe man correcting me on
something I don't really evencare about.
I don't care how efficient I amon the rower, people, you know.
And so I, when I got in the carand I was still irritated, I was
like, Yeah, it's always say yeswhen you want to say yeah, when
(40:38):
you know, say what you mean Ilove I could have said what
could I have said, sir, thankyou so much.
Wow, I really appreciate that.
But actually, no, I'm good.
I just I'm good.
Thank you.
Thank you though, for yourconcern.
Yeah, exactly.
I, I just, I felt it'sinteresting because we feel like
(40:58):
we get to a place where, ohyeah, I've got this.
I've got the boundary thing.
I've got the, but it was justlike a week ago.
Someone had described, um, I waslistening to a podcast and a
woman that was talking wassaying something like when you
say yes to someone but if itdoesn't feel like a yes to you,
(41:20):
like instinctively you're sayingno to yourself.
I was a little mad at myselfthis morning, but then I was
like, let it go.
Because I already know what afull body.
No.
And a full body.
Yes.
Feels like, yeah.
Um, and my whole body, it waslike, no, I don't want you.
Yeah.
And I didn't.
(41:41):
So the thing I was upset about,I wasn't upset with him.
I was upset that I, I was caughtoff guard, you know, and I
didn't honor myself.
I just kind of like, it wouldhappen so fast before I knew it,
it was over.
And I was like, you know, I justdidn't stand up for myself.
And because, but I was, youknow, in the gym, in my zone.
(42:02):
That's my time.
That's my time.
I have four kids and I, youknow, interact with people all
day.
I, that, that is my hour.
But, but then I was like, Ibelieve everything happens for a
reason.
So even things that happen likethis, like for some reason in a
day or two, I already know thatis going to serve me to help me
(42:25):
help someone else.
Yes.
Exactly.
And sometimes we need those, notlike we're asking for them when
we wake up in the morning, butit does wake us up perhaps to
another insight, something aboutthat.
Like you said, you're going tohave a client come in and it's
going to be fresh.
Do you know what I mean?
Mm-Hmm.
it'll be format, or, or therewas, you know, or it was just
(42:46):
like a reminder Yeah.
To, to walk, you know, like, tofollow what you teach.
Right.
And, which I do, but, and tomaybe understand that it's not,
it's, it's not easy.
It, you know, yeah.
There's a hundred differentinstances that you could insert,
but the important thing is that.
(43:07):
Self compassion, right?
Instead of beating myself up.
I was just like, okay, I wascaught off guard.
Yes.
Yes.
Self compassion.
Self compassion.
People are so hard onthemselves.
And I just, you know, sometimeswhen people do share with me
what, you know, they'veexperienced or we've revisited
something and I'm like, my God,I think you've done amazing with
(43:31):
what you've been through.
Holy cow.
You are, you are a rock star andthey're so hard on themselves.
And I think that's probably oneof the most important practices
that in gratitude, I think for,for folks who are on a healing
journey, because the more selfawareness.
(43:51):
We have perhaps hindsight'scoming in and we're seeing the
bigger picture and we're lookingback and looking forward and,
and maybe not happy with thechoices that we made and kind of
like reconciling because we'regetting more information.
And I think having that, likeyou said, that self compassion
and that gratitude.
(44:12):
Kind of help shore, at least itshores me up.
So I'm not so hard on myself.
Yeah.
And yeah, you can edit this partout if, if you don't want me to
say it, but, um, I listened to afew of your podcast episodes,
which I loved by the way.
Um, As I was preparing, I alwaysdo that.
(44:32):
And what just came into my mindis Kristen should never be hard
on herself, like literally ever,because I know you've talked
about with your audience beforeyou have an autistic son.
That's just something many of uswill never know.
You are taking care of yourelderly parent.
You're a single mom.
Um, like that assignment andthat role is, is so important.
(44:57):
A different kind of challengethat like many of us will never
know.
And everybody has theirchallenges, but like, I just
think you should give your breakyourself a break every single
day and just remind yourselfwhat you are doing and what you
have on your plate, you know,and just, you get a pass.
(45:17):
Girlfriend like thank you likeyou just you know and and and
you could if people can stepback and be like Actually,
because my husband does that tome.
He'll be like well look whatyou're dealing with right now,
you know A few minutes ago.
Our son had pneumonia I wastrying to work while he was home
like all this stuff and And Ihad a big project going on and
(45:42):
some other things were happeningand he's like, and I was just
like, this month is going tokill me.
And he was just like, I thinkyou're doing amazing.
And I was like, thank you forthat reminder.
You're right.
And you're right.
I am amazing.
I was like, once he said it,just remind, just remind
yourself, everyone remindyourself what you have on your
(46:04):
plate right now.
Yes.
Like we can forget like wereally can it's so easy because
we're going to the next thing.
Yeah.
No, I mean that picture Back upto the big picture No wonder
you're feeling the way you'refeeling Look at what you have on
your plate.
Look at what you're dealingwith.
Look at what's going on and ifwithin that You know, you're not
(46:30):
listening to yourself or you'recommitting small acts of self
betrayal.
I use that word all the timebecause that's what it is.
Um, it just piles on.
So true.
Yeah.
Oh, I just love talking withyou.
I love talking with you too.
So much wisdom and, and you,it's, it really comes across
(46:54):
when, when healers are out thereand they've, they've done the
work and they are willing to bevulnerable and, and, and they
know how to hold the space.
They know how to hold the spaceof their clients and.
And bring that wisdom, and beingthat, that, like you said, that
(47:19):
doula, that guide of like, thereis, there is empowerment.
There is hope.
There is more, more to you.
There's hope.
There is, there is hope.
Um, it, it requires learning andunlearning some things and
discovering some things, butthere is hope.
(47:40):
And, um, I think that's.
The inspiring message that, thatI felt like I never got, I felt
like the direct and indirectmessage was something's
inherently wrong with yourbrain.
Yeah.
I don't think I ever got thateither with the people I worked
with when I was depressed.
Something's wrong with yourbrain.
(48:01):
Hope is so it, we, we needinspiration to heal.
Well, I, I just, I adore you.
I, I think your offerings areamazing.
Oh, thank you.
And I just really appreciatethis time.
I really appreciate it.
Absolutely.
Yes.
And I want you just to spendjust a moment, just letting
(48:21):
people know, um, what you havegoing on and how to reach you.
So you can go to Claire oncomfort.
com and, uh, I'm sure Kristenwill be in the show notes.
Yeah.
Claire and comfort.
com.
You can reach me, uh, throughthat website.
And it also has ways you canwork with me and more about my
(48:42):
work.
If you're just interested inlearning about it and then.
Um, I have, I'm active onInstagram.
Um, my handle is at Claire dotUnkoffer and you can DM me and I
will respond.
Oh, thank you.
Thank you for spending time withus.
I really appreciate it.
Yeah.
Thank you.
All right.
Take care of everyone.
(49:03):
Much love.
Have a great week.
Thank you.
Hello everyone and welcome to Intuition Talks.
(00:03):
I am Kristen O'Meara and I amhere with a new friend, Claire
Unkefer, and I'm so excited tohave met you, Claire.
You are sharing such a uniqueWay of working with people and
we're going to dive into thatreally soon, but I, I really
(00:25):
appreciate all that you offer,which is working with people to
get to the root cause of theirsuffering of what is limiting
perhaps their self perception,how they're seeing the world
and, tapping into the.
(00:48):
Limitless power that we allhave.
So Claire, why don't you justshare a little bit about who you
are and.
And how that is coming out intothe world from you.
Sure.
Thank you.
Thank you for having me.
Um, yeah, a lot of this is basedon my own experience.
And then when I started workingwith other people, uh, to help
(01:12):
them, you know, hurdle the samejourney or help them along the
path, I started noticing.
And so the work that I do todayis based on kind of the step by
step, like journey that I'venoticed.
I didn't, I don't think I reallynoticed it from the outside that
there was a pattern to it.
But when I started working withpeople, it became like the same
(01:35):
thing over and over again.
And so there's like this type ofwoman and man, but really this
type of woman where, um, youknow, I struggled with
depression for years.
Some people are just like nothappy, but they don't know why.
There's really no reason.
Um, and a lot of people willsay, oh, well, I know it's
(01:58):
probably my trauma from mychildhood or my self worth or
whatever, you know, they, theythink they have a pretty good
idea.
And we, and we usually do.
But, um, we, we do all thethings we do and we, you and I
were talking before you hitrecord that I'm not anti
medicine or anti therapy, butthat doesn't always work for
(02:20):
everyone.
And I'm a nurse and I've, I'vebeen on both sides of that
seeing, you know, this is whattraditional medicine has to
offer and, and people do it, butit, it often doesn't give them
the relief.
That they're looking for or theor the long lasting relief that
(02:41):
they're looking for Yeah, andthey'll find themselves back in
this space and How the hell didI get here?
I thought it was better blahblah blah and um I help people
uncover the root cause of Oftheir depression or anxiety or
unhappiness or whatever it isthrough subconscious work.
(03:02):
And, and I don't mean likeyou're fully awake, you're not
hypnotized.
I just know how to help peopleaccess their subconscious minds.
It's kind of like a backdoor.
And I teach people how to do itthemselves because the answers
are All within you and that'swhy I was sitting across from a
(03:24):
therapist for all those yearsand I Wasn't making headway was
because I didn't even haveaccess to the information that
we should have been talking totalking about.
Isn't that true?
And I, I, I hate to interrupt.
No, no, no.
Yeah.
It's so true because I wastelling, um, you earlier and
folks, um, I've probably sharedin the past that I spent years
(03:46):
training to be a therapist andI'd had a lot of my own therapy.
Um, and of course there aredifferent types of, of talk
therapy and, and I think it'shelpful.
To a point, particularly forpeople who haven't had that
mirroring or that person tolisten to their story because
stories are so important.
(04:08):
Um, but after a while, uh, itjust seems that.
At least the therapists that Iknow, they seem to want to go
access different ways of workingwith clients because they see it
too.
So the soul has not beenconditioned.
So we can go through in our mindand, and try to, you know, get
(04:32):
rid of those habits or, orwhatever, but we have to be able
to find the answers in the waysthat work for us because not,
they're not necessarily theanswers of the ways, you know,
that other people have that aretelling us that are going to
work, even though they might begreat.
Does that make sense?
Yeah.
And I, I, the question for me isI was like, don't make, you
(04:55):
don't need to make me feelbetter.
Please help me heal.
Yes.
I don't need you to help me feelbetter.
Please help me heal.
How do I do that?
Right.
How do I do that?
And I think it's amazing.
I really challenge people todrop that story.
In fact, I tell people at thebeginning of our work together
(05:16):
that we are on a treasure huntand that I know what I'm looking
for and, and, and they're goingto love what we find, but we
have to kind of step out of thestory.
And so people will start goingdown that rabbit hole of telling
me their life story and.
And, and, and then I'll justkind of redirect them because
I'm, I'm looking for certainwords that will, Oh, there we
(05:39):
go.
That's where we need to go.
You know, but, um, I love it.
Yeah.
But it's, it's how to, don'tmake me feel better.
How do I heal?
And I challenge people to dropthe story and also consider.
Like, what would it be like forme to give up my identity as a
depressed person?
(06:00):
My identity as an anx, you know,having anxiety, because an
anxious feeling isn't bad.
There's, there's reasons why wehave anxiety.
Our body and mind are trying totell us something's off, and
we're not paying attention, andit's actually super awesome to
learn it.
How to tap into that wisdom, butwe've been told, Oh, anxiety is
(06:25):
bad.
Let's try to eliminate thosesymptoms, but anxiety and
depression are not the problem.
They're the, they're thesymptoms of the problem.
And so when we go after what thereal problem is, it's usually,
and how we do that through thesubconscious work.
Is we go back, you know, we justasked the mind, whatever the
(06:48):
inquiry is, when was the, whenwas this wound, did this wound
happen basically?
Like, when is the first time Iever experienced this or what
belief did I form that kind ofsolidified this way of being,
or, you know, and we'll often,uh, the mind will go back to
some sort of.
Memory, scene, and it's notscary, and it's not, it doesn't
(07:11):
even matter, it's like, sodoesn't matter, your mind is
playing charades, it's tellingyou a story, but, um, it'll be
something like, I'm standing inthe driveway, and I'm playing
ball with my friends, you know,and I'm like, okay, you know,
and.
But then it's what happens isthey get to see that their
parents were arguing in thehouse.
And what they started, they'reabsolutely able to tune into
(07:34):
that like little seven year oldversion of themselves.
And when I asked them, what areyou concluding right now?
And like good things don'thappen to me and won't happen to
me or I'm not good enoughbecause if we were happy and I
was good enough, then theywouldn't be arguing.
It's my fault.
They're arguing or it'll,they'll, they'll form this like
(07:59):
earth shattering belief that.
They can start to see thatthroughout their lives.
They always held that like Idon't matter.
Yeah, I'm not lovable.
I'm not good enough I'minsignificant.
I have to earn love.
I'm not just inherently lovableI have to earn it through my
actions and being good enoughand all that and Once we heal
(08:20):
that you feel different becauseyou are different.
First, I just want to say it'sso wonderful about your work
because you're not, feeding themind with that story, which is
so great.
So when you, when you don't givethe mind what it wants in terms
of going back to the story, itkind of, Force isn't the right
(08:40):
word, but like you said, itredirects the consciousness or
the, uh, of the self awarenessto there's something else
outside of that story, you know,to, to unpack, like you could
think that, Oh, I'm always goingto be alone or I don't feel this
self worth.
But then when you go and try tofigure out, like you said, the
(09:01):
root cause, then that opens adoorway and another doorway and
another doorway and anotherdoorway, like you said, to heal.
Um, Because inherently, Ibelieve we can all heal
ourselves.
Yes.
And you being the guy that youare, because we're not trained
as children to understand how toheal heartbreak or to forgive or
(09:26):
to be still, or to, to developthe tools that we all inherently
have to heal ourselves.
It's such a wonderful gift thatyou're offering to guide people
to, you know, you're more than,than what you're telling
yourself every day.
And it really brought to mindthat we all need to have bouts
of.
(09:46):
What we might think isdepression, although there is
clinical depression for sure,but there are times of sadness
that I think that We need tohonor because we might not have
grieved something that, thatwe're, you know, becoming aware
of.
And I don't think that we haveenough time in our modern life
(10:09):
to feel maybe some anxiety, ormaybe that's our intuition
trying to tell us something orto feel some sadness.
And I think there's this selfhelp industry that's kind of
coming with this message of.
You know, all of these feelings,you know, you need to be happy.
You need to be happy andhappiness comes and goes.
Yeah.
(10:29):
I'll give you, I feel called toshare this.
What's happening in my lifepersonally this week.
Um, I think probably a therapistand psychiatrist might look at
my situation this week and belike, Oh my gosh, you're
depressed.
Let's up your medication.
But what's happening this weekis my oldest son is graduating
from high school and gettingready to leave, to go to
(10:49):
college.
And.
Um, I'm happy for him.
I'm having a very interestingemotional response to it.
It feels like grief.
It feels like, it feels likegrief and like a loss.
And because we've already kindof lost in he, you know, he's
graduating, he's got a full timejob.
He's moving away.
Like it's no longer like, Ican't just assume he's available
(11:13):
Sunday for dinner.
Now I have to say, Hey son, I'mWhat's going on in your life?
Are you available for us?
And so it's a huge transition.
And so I've been breaking intotears, um, at random times all
week and not very motivated.
I was in my sweats yesterday onMother's Day and my husband was
(11:35):
concerned about me.
And I said, I'm not depressed.
I'm experiencing and processingsome grief and loss and sadness,
and it's very important that Iallow it to be, and I know, good
thing I know how to move it and,but I'm allowing it.
And because it's appropriate,right?
(11:56):
And so, but I think with myhistory in the past, With like
breaking down into tears, Ithink I would have been like,
Oh, I better call somebody andlike go on medication.
But really, no, my body'sprocessing totally normal.
And, and you're right, there isclinical depression.
And you and I kind of talkedbeforehand.
I've had both postpartumdepression and just clinical
(12:18):
depression.
And, um, and like, I want yourlisteners to know like severe
depression.
Like, I've been there where Ididn't want to live anymore.
I've been there where I couldn'tstop crying and I didn't know
why.
I've been there where smallthings were hard and I just
(12:40):
would break down.
And, and, but the, the, andthat's not the time, by the way,
to do this work.
Yeah.
Get, get.
Yourself better place, you know,get on your medication and see
your therapist, get yourself toit.
Cause it does take a certainamount of energy to do this
(13:01):
work, but the root cause is onlythe first piece we talked about,
you know, your podcast is calledintuition talks.
I started noticing that one ofthe biggest reasons we're
unhappy is because we don'tlive.
In alignment with our intuition,but the way I call it
authenticity, we don't, wearen't free to choose, make
(13:27):
choices and to be who we reallyare, our essence, right?
Um, and the message lovinglyfrom people that love us is be
you up to a certain point.
Be you as long as it doesn'tupset, disappoint or
inconvenience me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then, so we've learned tokind of mold ourselves to other
(13:53):
people's satisfactions andexpectations, right?
But that's not who we are.
And so part of the healingprocess is, is, is really
Embracing who you are perks andall like, wow, you know, what is
the, my, my spirit's verydisruptive, but I consider that
(14:14):
and I would got in trouble forit my whole life.
And I feel like God gave methat.
Yeah.
Um, I feel like that's, it's aspiritual quality.
It's.
Yeah.
Because you're speaking likeabout the shadow in a way,
right?
So, um, and I, I'm sorry tointerrupt you.
I just, I love what you saidabout that.
(14:36):
Um, and I don't know, tell me,um, if you got the feedback
growing up that, oh, this is anequality that's really
acceptable or, um, somethingthat, uh, you may be suppressed.
So, I think that.
The more intuitive developmentwork we do.
And the more we understand whowe are, we can learn, or we
(14:59):
learn, or we see that, Oh, thisaspect of me, this flamboyant or
eccentric aspect is a gift.
It's not something that I needto keep suppressing.
Cause I think that can causeanxiety and depression too.
Cause we're not, like you said,being authentic are, we know
when we're not being authentic.
And I think that can have itsown set of symptoms.
(15:21):
Well, yeah, like I always jokearound.
I said, my body won't let mebetray myself.
Like that's where the anxietyand the unhappiness and
everything comes in.
And it's because I've said yes,when I meant no or no minute
when I meant when I meant yes.
And so, and it's, you're right.
It's, it's about you lovingyourself.
(15:42):
And then once you can, and notjust, I'm not talking
affirmations.
It's a really incredibleprocess.
I'm not talking, you know,Intellectually, we know what we
should do.
I'm talking about at the levelof your nervous system in your
bones, really loving yourselfand accepting yourself.
(16:03):
Then if someone else doesn'taccept you.
You don't make it mean anythingabout you.
It means it might mean theydon't prefer you, but that
doesn't even matter to youbecause you know, you, you tell
you the story you tell yourselfis, well, they just don't get
me.
That's fine.
I'm gettable.
(16:23):
Um, next, you know, but youdon't.
Take it in like you've probablytaken it in your whole life and
and what that has made us do Ialways joke that we all have
like a cover photo on our lives,right or on us.
We have a cover photo We havelike we call them social masks
or whatever you want to call itBut when you can take that off
(16:46):
And be like, listen, this is me.
Not all relationships survivethat shift.
Actually.
It's really.
Yeah.
I've, I've gone through so many,I've shed so many skins in my,
my healing journey.
Friends have come and go.
It's, it's interesting.
And it's, I can be a hard part,but yeah, it's, it's, um, and,
(17:07):
and being careful to not makethat mean, um, I should just
tuck that right back in.
Yeah.
Um, it's just, it's just.
It's okay.
It's the shifting the naturalshifting that occurs through the
healing process and you know, itreally is Allowing what needs to
leave your life to leave yourlife and letting what needs to
(17:29):
come in, come in.
And then there's this, I call itthe uncomfortable void.
There's a void when you let goand something new is coming, but
hasn't come.
And there's like this void, justkind of like surrendering and
all as well and loving yourselfand trusting.
And that's when life gets, um,dare I word they use magical.
(17:52):
Yeah.
And yeah, when you can really,and really tune in with yourself
and it's fascinating to me,Kristen, and I'm sure you get
this because you teachintuition, how many people don't
know how they feel about thingsor what makes them happy.
You ask the question, what doyou just, what does, does your
(18:13):
spirit love and it just kind oflook at you confused, you know?
So it's about getting to knowyourself again too.
Yes.
And I, um, I've actually, it'sreally funny.
I've reconnected with my sevenyear old self this week because
I've gotten a little serious andwhen I was a little girl, I
(18:34):
would wear these really fancydresses because I was the only
girl out of four boys, four boysand one girl.
So I got all the cute dresses,but I was a tomboy and playing
with my brothers.
So I would play outside barefootin these beautiful dresses.
And.
just carefree and happy.
(18:57):
And so I have spent time withher, um, this week in my
meditations.
And it was actually, you know, Ihad a little moment with her
where I, I, I said, I don't evenknow how to be like you anymore.
And she said, I'll teach you.
Oh, so it's, it's, it's just,you know, it's, it's not that I
(19:20):
would consider myself.
I've healed myself fromdepression and anxiety.
And I help people understand theroot cause of their depression
and anxiety and where, why they,the how, where, why, and when
they ever started to feel thosefeelings, what was going on.
It doesn't even have to besomething as much as anxiety and
depression.
(19:41):
You know, a lot of people, womenthat come see me have control
issues.
Yes.
And we'll take them.
I'll ask the mind to show us,Hey, where did that ever come
from?
And it will take us to somerandom scene, not even a super
traumatic scene from theirchildhood, where something was
out of control.
I've had one woman, she wentback and, um, her cousin, An
(20:05):
aunt were in a car accident ontheir street and they brought
them into the house and all sheremembers is all the blood and
she thought her cousin, who washer best friend, was going to
die.
And so this is not safe, right?
This is.
The world isn't safe.
The world isn't safe, right?
And, um, another time I had aclient go back and she was at
(20:29):
the grocery store with her dadand they got locked out of their
car and it was winter and therewere no cell phones and they
couldn't get ahold of her mom.
And so she started and her daddidn't come for her, not because
he was a horrible person, justbecause he was trying to
probably figure it out.
Right.
And she remembers being cold andnot.
(20:51):
Knowing when and if help wascoming and she was like five and
so the mind goes, I know, Idon't like this feeling of being
out of control.
So.
So to experience this again,we're just going to be in
control of everything in chargeof everything and that's, that's
a great plan, right?
(21:11):
Um, fast forward to, you know,30s and they're in their 30s and
40s.
It's not a great plan.
It makes you miserable.
You don't really like thataspect of yourself.
Other people don't like thataspect of yourself, right?
Yeah.
And it's, it's just a programthat continued to run just like
the unlovable program continuedto run.
(21:32):
It is a program.
And you know, I call it like inthis book, um, I book that I've
written that it's coming out inthe fall.
I call it, I had todifferentiate the mind because
the mind You know, there aredifferent aspects of it.
I, I believe.
So we've got like the lower mindor the ego and the higher mind
that can, the higher mind canhold like non linear thought,
(21:54):
curiosity, objectivity.
It can link to and accept theunknown, but the lower mind, the
ego personality, whatever youwant to call it, um, When there
has been like a significantthreat to survival, like the,
the five year old in wintertime, as you know, it will, it
will create a program of thereare, I'm going to put us in the
(22:18):
safe box and we're going totravel in it.
I just like to try to challengepeople about labels because.
You know, another little boy,same thing.
He, and this is a teenager, um,he was struggling after, uh, an
act of violence at his school, areally horrible act of violence.
(22:39):
And he was struggling andstarted having anxiety and
didn't want to go to school.
Didn't want to like, Go anywhereanymore and appropriately so the
parents were concerned took himto the pediatrician pediatrician
sent him to a psychiatristpsychiatrist put him on medicine
sent him to a therapist.
Let's talk about this anxiety.
Now we've got an anxietydisorder for the rest of our
life.
Right, right, right.
And May and maybe like yeah,like did I didn't work with this
(23:02):
little boy I just the story justlike struck me because I was
like, oh my god, he's gonna growup Managing my anxiety when his
response was appropriate to whathappened Yes, his mind.
Well, you know like he got stuckin it, but his his mind was like
Wow.
I could just go to school andjust something really bad could
(23:24):
happen and hit me from the sideand I wouldn't see it coming.
The world isn't safe.
Right.
And so I know I've got a greatidea at that lower mind.
Let's just not go anywhere.
Then we're safe.
Yes.
Yes.
So that's why I love Theintuitive development piece and
the mindfulness, if you want tocall it that, cause it's, you
(23:47):
know, it is what it is, butsometimes I don't like even the
term mindfulness because when Iwas running a wellness center at
a high school, they were like,Oh, mindfulness, whatever.
But really, if you just talkabout bringing your awareness to
the present moment and however,through whatever practice you
want to use and.
Use the opportunity to connectwith the body.
(24:11):
Like you're talking about withthe nervous system and having
that validation that yes, thatwas a really horrible experience
at school, you know, validate,yes, some confirmation
validation.
And of course you're scared.
Every person's different.
So maybe that.
That child or that teenager, Idon't, how old is he?
(24:34):
He was 14, 14, you know, we'reall so different, you know, I, I
would only imagine that it'sokay to be home for a period of
time, you know, they're there,you know, connect with animals,
you know, and if medication isthe only route.
To, to help him resource or helphim in that moment.
That's fine too.
But there are other ways, likeyou said, to heal and we want to
(25:01):
move.
So, and I think this goes backto making space to grieve,
making space to be sad, makingspace to be anxious because
there are other parts of us thatare telling us that, that it can
heal.
But when we're rushing becausewe're anxious parents or we're
(25:21):
anxious.
In general, we really love ourchild.
We really want to help ourchild.
But when there's this big rushto get them into the doctor, get
them on meds, get that label.
It's just, sometimes I feel likewe just need to take a step
back.
Yeah, it's, it's, um, it'sallowing yourself to just like,
and you know, but I explained toclients, you're going to want to
(25:44):
be up here telling me aboutthings.
And I'm going to ask you aquestion.
You're going to think about it.
I need you to drop down and justlet the answer drop in or bubble
up and, and it's beautiful whathappens.
And then I'll even say, Oh,you've, you've, you've come
back.
You know, cause that's theproblem.
We're all smart.
(26:05):
We can't intellectualizeourselves out of this.
Unfortunately, that's the thingthat I wish the self help
industry would understand isthat you can't, we, you cannot
affirmation your way.
And I do affirmations, butthere's, you have to feel it in
your body.
(26:26):
You have to, you know, how likesomeone tells you something,
you're like, yeah, that's truth.
But you feel it in your heart,in your body.
Yeah, and so the client is notgoing to heal until they have
that experience themselvesrelated to what's going on with
them.
They have to come to this point.
(26:47):
That's my job, is to get themthere.
They have to come to this pointthat they're like, My God.
Oh my God, I get it now.
I, I, I didn't see it before andI had one client say, it's like
there was this door in the walland it was there the whole time,
but I didn't know it was therebecause it was a secret door.
And you just went, look, there'sa door.
(27:08):
And I went, Oh, that's cool.
And I just, that was so simple,but it, it really is.
It's not going subconscious.
People are afraid ofsubconscious.
It's not going to be anythingyou're surprised about because
the subconscious mind is soclosely related to intuition.
And that's why I don't, I havethree certifications in
hypnotherapy.
(27:28):
I don't hypnotize peopleanymore.
I teach people how to get tothat space that they are.
Talking to their body, talkingto their mind, trying to get
information, understanding, youknow, understanding, and then
teaching them to do this for alife skill.
Yes.
(27:49):
Right?
Like, and what's right for me?
And then again, people will tryto pop up into their brains.
No, no, no, no.
What's right for me?
What do I want to do?
And the answer will drop down orbubble up.
Yeah.
That's the easiest way I candescribe it.
And it will be usually simple.
(28:11):
Do you?
Yes.
And it's usually for me, whenI've had it for myself, it's
usually like a couple of wordsand it's always simple.
It's not complex.
And when you know it's reallysuper complex, it's coming from
the mind.
Yeah.
I tell people it's a, it's gonnabe a very simple word or phrase.
And that's, that's how it comes.
That's how, and, but thenthere's some things we do that
they can kind of like get moreinformation.
(28:31):
But the first thing that comesis a very simple word or phrase
and it drops down or bubbles up.
And I love the look on people'sfaces when they realize, Oh my
God, there is something there,you know.
So you, I love what you offer.
You offer, I believe twodifferent programs.
I mean, you have a whole suiteof offerings and I want you to,
(28:53):
to share what those are, butthey're two in particular.
Yeah.
So, um, oh, the inside outhealing method is, and I do that
one on one with people, or Ihave a self paced program that
people can go through and do thework themselves.
Um, I just have all the tools inone place and, um, The inside
(29:16):
out healing method is the fivesteps to go through to to really
Know yourself in it.
It's the root cause Authenticitylearning to tolerate people
being disappointed You know inyour choices, um communication.
That was another surprising onebut it it's fine if we're happy
(29:39):
and healed or getting there orlearning to like, um, Be
ourselves, but if we are stayingin patterns of reactivity with
people in our lives That's No,no.
Bueno.
So we, yeah, we, we unlearn somecommon ways of communicating and
we learn some techniques.
(29:59):
And it's, and this was trial anderror.
My husband had come up withthese over the past five years
because we decided we were notgoing to do it the way we had
been doing it in our previousmarriages and it didn't get us,
you know, so we were, we weregoing to do it differently.
So just relearning these simplecommunication strategies,
shedding skins, learning how toshift identities, how to talk,
(30:22):
how to talk to the worst partsof you, how to get, you How to
get that part of you tounderstand that it's now safe.
It's now, you know, it's, I justdid this with somebody this
week, you know, we talked to apart of her that has armored up.
(30:43):
Yes.
He's armored up over, you know,and it's okay to put the, the
armor down.
Yeah.
It's okay.
You survived it.
You know, you needed it then,but you don't need it now.
And we, but we had to have aconversation with the part of
her.
And that part of her had to feellike, Oh, thank God, you know,
(31:05):
cause this has been a lot tocarry and really feel like it
was given permission to like,not be anymore.
And then the last thing is thebody speak method, which is, um,
it was a way I worked withclients and their bodies and
their nervous systems and torelease stuck emotions and to
(31:26):
get the root cause.
And then I'm, I simplified itinto 10 steps.
Uh, so that it could berepeatable.
And I teach people that, um, andit's basically, you know, the
body speak method, discoveringwhat your body already knows
and, and just connecting you tothat, your body, and that's,
that's just like a course, um,and you can do it with me or.
(31:48):
Or a course on, um, yeah, justconnecting to where, where the
answers are, how to get your owninner guidance, um, how to get
the, all that wisdom, you know,what is my anxiety trying to
tell me?
What is, you know, what ishappening right now?
I'm triggered.
Why?
What's happening?
(32:09):
And how do I fix it?
And how to get those answers.
And so that is for me been thebiggest thing that's been the
game changer because lifehappens, life will go on, and
that's a tool that I can grab toto feel better so that I don't
(32:30):
have to carry emotions around.
Oh, I love that.
So powerful.
Yeah.
Cause I'm a feeler And, andjust, yeah, just that's a lot of
what's a trick when we saytriggered it's, there's these
unprocessed, unfully digestedExperiences and or emotions that
(32:55):
are sitting in your, whateveryou want to call it in your
field, in your body, in yournervous system.
And all we're doing is releasingthem.
And that's the healing process.
We're not regurgitating it.
You're not, I'm not, I don'tcare about how your week was.
I do care about how your weekwas, but, but we're, we're,
we're healing here.
And, and it's really funny.
People are so, your body wheelwill decide what's next.
(33:22):
Yeah.
There's no agenda.
Um, I worked with somebody andwe booked the appointment and
then for two days she likecouldn't sleep and her heart
started palpitating and I'veheard that and that's her body
getting ready to purgesomething.
Yes.
Yeah.
And that's really interestingtoo where we have different
perspectives like you're, you'rebringing up right now about the
(33:43):
body.
You know, different perspectivesthat we would perhaps without
that awareness or without that,um, body awareness or
relationship with the body withthat sleepless nights and
preparing for, you know, thesession, we may Just say to
ourselves, Oh, this is a badthing.
You know, I need to medicatethis or this isn't okay.
(34:06):
And it could be excitement.
The spirit and the body might belike, I'm really excited to
like, get rid of this stuff.
Yeah.
You know, there's, there couldbe all sorts of things.
And I think we're, we, um, Wethink that all uncomfortable
feelings and experiences arenegative.
And I just.
Yeah.
Well, she, she, it's notcomfortable.
(34:26):
Right.
And I told her it's, you know,it's, she was a mom and she is a
mom of two.
I said, it's like when you hadyour babies, it wasn't so
comfortable in the deliveryroom.
Was it when you were birthingthat emotion, right?
That baby, when you werebirthing that experience where
we're getting it out of yourbody, right.
It's not very comfortable.
(34:47):
It might, it might make us losea night's sleep.
It might make my heart flutter,but then I'm, I'm the doula.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I help you deliver that, andthen here's your baby, you know,
like, now, oh my god, now I feelso much better.
But the, the actual Um, youknow, and I had a, a business
(35:07):
coach tell me never tell peoplethat it's gonna be work.
Ever.
They're not gonna sign up forthat.
And I was like, then they'renot, then they're just not
ready.
Because when you're miserableenough, when you're miserable
enough, where I was and wherepeople are when they come see
me, I joke, I call myself thelast resort practitioner.
(35:27):
They're like, what do you wantme to do?
I'll do anything.
I don't care.
Because a, a little of my work,you know, that intuitive world
is a little, your work isdifferent.
And lawyers, navy seals, youknow, real people that you would
never think would like try totap into their, like, what, what
do you, I, I'm miserable.
(35:48):
What do I gotta do to feelbetter?
Mm-Hmm.
if you are not in that space.
Good.
Yeah.
But for the people that are, forthe people that are in that
space, and for me, when I got tothat point, I remember thinking
there's got to be somethingbetter than this.
And I, I felt a sense of angerand power that I wanted to turn
(36:14):
around with my medical sword andsay, let's do this shit.
For me, I know that it was sothat I could help other people.
So I had to show them the wayout.
So, so that I could sit withthem and really get how they're
feeling like I, I get it likeI've been there.
I don't, you know, I, and I knowthat there's a way to, to
(36:39):
better, you know, and it's not,it doesn't have to be.
I'm going to ditch everythingI'm doing and do this, but, and
I tried everything.
It was so desperate.
I, I literally tried and thereare so many healing modalities
that are so wonderful that I wasso hopeful were going to help
me.
And nothing would make itbetter, nothing would make it
(37:01):
better until for me, I foundthis kind of relationship with
my, with my mind and my bodythat is like, what do I need to
know here in order to heal?
And for you, you said, you kindof touched on it, it might be,
but like when I'm going throughsomething difficult, I seriously
say, what am I supposed to belearning here?
(37:23):
Yes.
Yeah.
I never liked the answer.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
And it's almost like, God, I'vebeen through enough.
Like what am I supposed to belearning?
Yeah.
But there is always something.
And you know, you know what itis for me every time learning
how to let go even more, evenmore, even more, surrendering,
(37:49):
trusting more.
And for me, it's loving myselfmore.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Accepting yourself.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Don't make.
What are you making things mean?
Right.
Like, just like I said, like I'mbursting out in tears and having
what might look like adepressive episode, but I'm just
(38:09):
like, you know, being a sad mamawho's getting ready to lose her
18 year old to the world.
And he is like ready.
He's gone.
You know, like he's not, I'm notsure he's coming back.
He's just.
And that might be like the wholefreshman year.
I mean, like, and that's okay.
(38:29):
Like we need to honor the factthat my gosh, your baby's
leaving the nest.
Yeah.
I have three more.
So we use humor a lot in ourhouse.
And so my, my daughter's like,it's like, you know, you have
three of them, three more likefine.
You know, like just, it's fine.
(38:50):
Just spend more time with us.
You're going to be hugging themso much.
Like, yeah, but what are you,what are you telling yourself?
What story are you tellingyourself right now about what
you're experiencing?
You know, and, and, and anotherone big one, I think for women,
that's so important is, um,committing to say no when they
(39:13):
mean no and yes, when they mean,yes.
And, and that's like a mantra ofmine because I'm really bad at
that sometimes, even thismorning at the gym, it was
really funny.
I was at the gym and I was onthe rower for two minutes,
warming up before my, beforelifting some weights.
And I, I had AirPods in, hellopeople.
(39:34):
I don't want to talk to anybody.
You know, I just want to be hereand do my work and leave, and
this is my time.
And this guy comes up to me.
And he goes, would you like somefeedback on your rowing?
Oh, no.
He's like, let me show you howto make this more efficient.
And in my mind, I'm like, AndI'm like, I said, sure.
Uh, but in my mind, I'm like,no, I don't want feedback on my
(39:56):
rowing.
I just did it to warm up and toget, you know, to work out.
And I had, I've been working outfor years and years and years.
And he's like, well, I rode andcall, you know, I'm like, I
don't freaking care, you know,but in, so that's inside what
I'm feeling, but I didn't letthat social mask, that cover
(40:17):
photo go.
I went, sure.
And I was nice.
and sat there and listened tothe man correcting me on
something I don't really evencare about.
I don't care how efficient I amon the rower, people, you know.
And so I, when I got in the carand I was still irritated, I was
like, Yeah, it's always say yeswhen you want to say yeah, when
(40:38):
you know, say what you mean Ilove I could have said what
could I have said, sir, thankyou so much.
Wow, I really appreciate that.
But actually, no, I'm good.
I just I'm good.
Thank you.
Thank you though, for yourconcern.
Yeah, exactly.
I, I just, I felt it'sinteresting because we feel like
(40:58):
we get to a place where, ohyeah, I've got this.
I've got the boundary thing.
I've got the, but it was justlike a week ago.
Someone had described, um, I waslistening to a podcast and a
woman that was talking wassaying something like when you
say yes to someone but if itdoesn't feel like a yes to you,
(41:20):
like instinctively you're sayingno to yourself.
I was a little mad at myselfthis morning, but then I was
like, let it go.
Because I already know what afull body.
No.
And a full body.
Yes.
Feels like, yeah.
Um, and my whole body, it waslike, no, I don't want you.
Yeah.
And I didn't.
(41:41):
So the thing I was upset about,I wasn't upset with him.
I was upset that I, I was caughtoff guard, you know, and I
didn't honor myself.
I just kind of like, it wouldhappen so fast before I knew it,
it was over.
And I was like, you know, I justdidn't stand up for myself.
And because, but I was, youknow, in the gym, in my zone.
(42:02):
That's my time.
That's my time.
I have four kids and I, youknow, interact with people all
day.
I, that, that is my hour.
But, but then I was like, Ibelieve everything happens for a
reason.
So even things that happen likethis, like for some reason in a
day or two, I already know thatis going to serve me to help me
(42:25):
help someone else.
Yes.
Exactly.
And sometimes we need those, notlike we're asking for them when
we wake up in the morning, butit does wake us up perhaps to
another insight, something aboutthat.
Like you said, you're going tohave a client come in and it's
going to be fresh.
Do you know what I mean?
Mm-Hmm.
it'll be format, or, or therewas, you know, or it was just
(42:46):
like a reminder Yeah.
To, to walk, you know, like, tofollow what you teach.
Right.
And, which I do, but, and tomaybe understand that it's not,
it's, it's not easy.
It, you know, yeah.
There's a hundred differentinstances that you could insert,
but the important thing is that.
(43:07):
Self compassion, right?
Instead of beating myself up.
I was just like, okay, I wascaught off guard.
Yes.
Yes.
Self compassion.
Self compassion.
People are so hard onthemselves.
And I just, you know, sometimeswhen people do share with me
what, you know, they'veexperienced or we've revisited
something and I'm like, my God,I think you've done amazing with
(43:31):
what you've been through.
Holy cow.
You are, you are a rock star andthey're so hard on themselves.
And I think that's probably oneof the most important practices
that in gratitude, I think for,for folks who are on a healing
journey, because the more selfawareness.
(43:51):
We have perhaps hindsight'scoming in and we're seeing the
bigger picture and we're lookingback and looking forward and,
and maybe not happy with thechoices that we made and kind of
like reconciling because we'regetting more information.
And I think having that, likeyou said, that self compassion
and that gratitude.
(44:12):
Kind of help shore, at least itshores me up.
So I'm not so hard on myself.
Yeah.
And yeah, you can edit this partout if, if you don't want me to
say it, but, um, I listened to afew of your podcast episodes,
which I loved by the way.
Um, As I was preparing, I alwaysdo that.
(44:32):
And what just came into my mindis Kristen should never be hard
on herself, like literally ever,because I know you've talked
about with your audience beforeyou have an autistic son.
That's just something many of uswill never know.
You are taking care of yourelderly parent.
You're a single mom.
Um, like that assignment andthat role is, is so important.
(44:57):
A different kind of challengethat like many of us will never
know.
And everybody has theirchallenges, but like, I just
think you should give your breakyourself a break every single
day and just remind yourselfwhat you are doing and what you
have on your plate, you know,and just, you get a pass.
(45:17):
Girlfriend like thank you likeyou just you know and and and
you could if people can stepback and be like Actually,
because my husband does that tome.
He'll be like well look whatyou're dealing with right now,
you know A few minutes ago.
Our son had pneumonia I wastrying to work while he was home
like all this stuff and And Ihad a big project going on and
(45:42):
some other things were happeningand he's like, and I was just
like, this month is going tokill me.
And he was just like, I thinkyou're doing amazing.
And I was like, thank you forthat reminder.
You're right.
And you're right.
I am amazing.
I was like, once he said it,just remind, just remind
yourself, everyone remindyourself what you have on your
(46:04):
plate right now.
Yes.
Like we can forget like wereally can it's so easy because
we're going to the next thing.
Yeah.
No, I mean that picture Back upto the big picture No wonder
you're feeling the way you'refeeling Look at what you have on
your plate.
Look at what you're dealingwith.
Look at what's going on and ifwithin that You know, you're not
(46:30):
listening to yourself or you'recommitting small acts of self
betrayal.
I use that word all the timebecause that's what it is.
Um, it just piles on.
So true.
Yeah.
Oh, I just love talking withyou.
I love talking with you too.
So much wisdom and, and you,it's, it really comes across
(46:54):
when, when healers are out thereand they've, they've done the
work and they are willing to bevulnerable and, and, and they
know how to hold the space.
They know how to hold the spaceof their clients and.
And bring that wisdom, and beingthat, that, like you said, that
(47:19):
doula, that guide of like, thereis, there is empowerment.
There is hope.
There is more, more to you.
There's hope.
There is, there is hope.
Um, it, it requires learning andunlearning some things and
discovering some things, butthere is hope.
(47:40):
And, um, I think that's.
The inspiring message that, thatI felt like I never got, I felt
like the direct and indirectmessage was something's
inherently wrong with yourbrain.
Yeah.
I don't think I ever got thateither with the people I worked
with when I was depressed.
Something's wrong with yourbrain.
(48:01):
Hope is so it, we, we needinspiration to heal.
Well, I, I just, I adore you.
I, I think your offerings areamazing.
Oh, thank you.
And I just really appreciatethis time.
I really appreciate it.
Absolutely.
Yes.
And I want you just to spendjust a moment, just letting
(48:21):
people know, um, what you havegoing on and how to reach you.
So you can go to Claire oncomfort.
com and, uh, I'm sure Kristenwill be in the show notes.
Yeah.
Claire and comfort.
com.
You can reach me, uh, throughthat website.
And it also has ways you canwork with me and more about my
(48:42):
work.
If you're just interested inlearning about it and then.
Um, I have, I'm active onInstagram.
Um, my handle is at Claire dotUnkoffer and you can DM me and I
will respond.
Oh, thank you.
Thank you for spending time withus.
I really appreciate it.
Yeah.
Thank you.
All right.
Take care of everyone.
(49:03):
Much love.
Have a great week.
Thank you.
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