March 31, 2025 • 22 mins
Is your space screaming while your spirit is suffocating under piles of laundry, unread emails, and mental chaos? Girl, this episode isn’t just about picking up—it's about reclaiming your peace. 🎯
In this heart-hitting and hope-filled episode, we’re getting real about the mess behind the mess. Whether it’s clutter in your kitchen, car, calendar, or conversations, this is your invitation to clear space—physically, emotionally, and spiritually—and finally breathe again.
You’ll learn:
✨ How to spot the not-so-obvious clutter stealing your sanity
✨ Why clutter isn’t just stuff—it’s stories, stress, and sometimes… silence
✨ Practical ways to build rhythms that keep chaos from creeping back
✨ How your mess may be modeling something for your kids
✨ And how a little porch time and a lot of peace can change everything
Plus, stay tuned until the end for a bonus scriptural mic drop from one of our amazing IRCS High School students who visited Shepherd’s Village to pour some truth and love into YOU. 💗
Let’s declutter your chaos—and make room for the calm God has been waiting to bring into your life.
It's a Single Mom Thing, Not the Single Thing That Stops You!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to it's a Single Mom Thing, the show for
single moms by single moms.
This is Sherri, your host, andI am happy you are here today.
Remember it's a single momthing and not the single thing
that stops you.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Ever walk into a room and forget while you're there,
only to trip over a laundrybasket and realize, oh yeah, I
was headed for a nervousbreakdown.
Yeah, I've been there.
If your home looks like abefore photo on a cleaning show
and your mind feels just asmessy, well, this episode is for
you, because here's the truthClutter isn't just what's on
(00:40):
your countertops, it's what'scrowding your thoughts, draining
your energy and stealing yourpeace.
And as single moms, well, wecarry a lot, too much sometimes,
and the last thing we need isthe chaos in our space, making
us feel like chaos inside.
And here's what you don't know,I'm guessing.
(01:02):
According to PrincetonNeuroscience Institute, physical
clutter competes for yourbrain's attention, reduces focus
, increases stress and can eventrigger procrastination.
Yeah, that overflowing closet.
It's not just annoying, it'sactually rewiring your brain for
anxiety and fatigue.
(01:23):
Now, I don't know about you,but I have that one closet that
I haven't gotten to that givesme a panic attack every time I
open it.
You know the one that youeither can't shut once you open
it, or you open it and you haveto duck and cover for fear what
might fall out.
Yeah, that one.
So if you've ever said, well,it's just stuff.
(01:47):
It's no big deal.
Today you are going to learnwhy it actually is a big deal.
But here's the good news youcan take back your space and
your sanity with small changesthat create big shifts, changes
(02:09):
that create big shifts.
We're talking how to simplifyyour space, how to detox your
mind and how to invite God intoboth your home and heart so you
can breathe again.
This isn't about perfection.
It's about simply peace, andpeace doesn't start when your
laundry is folded.
It starts when you make roomfor what matters and let go of
what doesn't.
So grab your thriving 25journal, pull your hair into a
(02:34):
messy bun and let's declutterour chaos together.
One drawer, one thought and oneprayer at a time.
Clutter isn't just on the floor, it's in your life.
So let's go beyond the laundry,okay?
Because clutter.
It doesn't stop at youroverflowing hamper or the
(02:54):
half-eaten chicken nuggets onyour couch.
It's sneaky.
It hides in your routines, yourthoughts, your finances, and
it's robbing your peace.
So let's call it what it isChaos disguised, as I'll get to
it later or control disguised aspeace.
(03:16):
What does your kitchencountertop look like right now?
If I had to go to your house,what would I see?
Is the cereal still out fromthis morning?
Is last night's dinner stuck tothe plate like it's auditioning
for a construction job?
What about your bedroom?
Is it a rest zone or a laundryavalanche?
Do you have to high step itthrough piles just to hit the
(03:36):
pillow?
How about your car?
Does it smell like Chick-fil-Anuggets and some defeat?
Is your digital life clutteredtoo?
Texts you're dodging, emailsyou've ignored, I don't know.
Does your email inbox look liketwo unread messages or 2,781?
What about that text youhaven't responded to, or the one
(03:59):
you shouldn't respond toanymore?
Is your bank account acluttered trail of
treat-yourself stress purchasesand overdraft fees?
What about your relationships?
Are there any messy emotionalcorners you have just closed the
door on?
But on the flip side, maybe,your house is spotless.
(04:22):
Everything has a place, thetowels are folded into thirds,
the throw pillows are fluffedand not a single dish dares to
live in your sink.
But let me ask you this Is yourspace perfectly tidy because
you never let anyone in?
Is your house a showroom?
Because it's the one area youcan control.
(04:45):
So here's a little sassy truthbomb I want to drop on you.
You could be drowning inclutter or drowning in control.
Either way, baby, you can'tbreathe.
So we need to do a little faithcheck here for a moment.
And we're going to find that inProverbs 4.23.
And it says, above all else,guard your heart, for everything
(05:08):
you do flows from it.
So how about we reframe the wordclutter?
Because I don't like that word.
I don't know about you.
Clutter, well, it's anythingthat crowds your space and your
spirit, my sister.
It's anything that steals yourpeace and hides your purpose
under a pile of noise.
(05:28):
It doesn't just live on yourfloor, it lives in your mindset,
your money or even your margins.
So this is more about cleaningIf you haven't noticed this
episode.
It's about clearing the way forclarity, peace and purpose to
rise back up in your life.
Would you like some of that?
So here are some realreflection questions that I want
(05:50):
you to start asking yourself.
What space in your life feelschaotic, not just messy?
What are you trying to controlso tightly because everything
else feels out of control?
And have you confused yourselfor convinced yourself that this
is just how life is right?
Now you see, whether it'sclutter you can see or clutter
(06:12):
you've buried deep.
It's taking up space that Godwants to fill with peace.
So let's start making some room.
Start small, think big.
So let's be honest, ladies,rome wasn't cleaned in a day,
and neither is your life, yourhouse or even your headspace.
(06:32):
But the biggest transformations,yeah, those don't start with a
full sweep.
They start with a single step.
Start with, let's say, forexample, one drawer, one surface
, one mindset, because when youstart small, well, you're more
likely to finish.
You build momentum, thenmotivate, you train your brain
(06:55):
to recognize progress overperfection.
You see small steps, well, theyequal big shifts.
You start to clear your kitchencounter.
Now you've made space tonourish yourself again.
You see, when you clean outyour purse, hello, peace of mind
, and that missing debit cardthat you couldn't find.
You see, when you unsubscribefrom 30 emails that you never
(07:18):
read, that's 30 less digitaldistractions stealing your time.
Or how about archiving thattext thread from someone who
drains your joy, girl?
That's some mad freedom rightthere.
And if it's not a drawer, maybeit's a decision.
Maybe it looks likeunsubscribing from a person who
has been living rent-free inyour head, or deleting the
(07:42):
photos that take you back toplaces you no longer live,
physically or emotionally, oreven creating margin by doing
nothing at all, because, listen,sometimes self-care isn't a
task, it's a time out.
You see, this isn't aboutspring cleaning, it's about soul
(08:02):
clearing.
And for my overwhelmed queens,listen, if this feels like too
much and you're ready to shutoff the show, then maybe your
small step today, and today only, is a sacred pause.
You don't have to do anythingto be worthy of some breathing
room.
Build in margin, not becauseyou've earned it, because,
(08:25):
listen, girl, you need it.
You see, pause, it is aproductive word when it makes
space for peace.
And so here's a little personalreflection from my own life.
Just recently, when I discoveredflow over force you see, I've
been renting this headspace justthis week, you see, everything
(08:47):
in my life it felt loud, chaotic, cluttered and completely
overwhelming.
Every space I looked atscreamed for attention and I
didn't have any more to give.
I didn't have any more to give.
Maybe you can relate.
For me, I realized I needed toshift from force to flow.
(09:07):
Instead of pushing through, Igave myself simply a timeout,
and for me that meant one thingthe front porch, it's my entry
point, both literally andmentally.
It sets the tone for how I showup in my day.
And when I finally sat stilllong enough to notice I saw my
(09:30):
garden had become a metaphor formy life.
Maybe you have seen this inyour own Weeds growing, wild,
dead plants hanging on from aseason that had already passed
Messy, frustrating, invisible toanyone passing by.
So I got my hands dirty, notwith just a big plan, just a
(09:50):
moment of motion.
I cleared the weeds, pulledwhat no longer belonged and
slowly the chaos it started toshrink.
Then I did one more thing.
I added some color.
I went to the store and pickedup a few vibrant, affordable
plants, just those small pops oflife.
(10:11):
They shifted my whole point ofview.
You see, sometimes the biggesttransformation doesn't start
inside, it starts right outsideyour front door.
And once I cleared that space,listen, something happened.
I've realized I could move onto another unattended garden in
(10:32):
my life.
That needed some TLC too.
Clear space equals a clear mind.
Have you ever walked into amessy room and instantly felt
intense, scattered or evensnappy?
That's not just a mood, it's ascience.
Clutter isn't neutral, it'snoisy.
(10:53):
Now studies have shown thatphysical clutter increases
cortisol levels that's yourstress hormone and it makes it
harder for your brain to focus,process or even rest.
And let's be honest, singlemoms already have enough tabs
open in their minds, am I right?
We don't need extra chaoscoming from the corner of the
(11:17):
counter too.
Here's something else.
Clutter isn't just stuff, it isstories.
That pile of mail on the end ofyour countertop yeah, that
might be bills that you areavoiding.
Or that overstuffed closet itmight be full of clothes from
your version of you that doesn'tfit you anymore, physically or
emotionally.
And that junk drawer, alsoknown as the catch-all drawer
(11:41):
yeah, it might be the one thingyou feel like you can hide when
everything else feels exposed.
You see, when your environmentis chaotic, your thoughts well,
they follow suit.
But when you create clear space, ooh girl, your soul can
finally exhale.
And I'm not done here.
Let's talk about that car.
(12:02):
Ever try starting the day witha cluttered car?
Fast food bags on the floor,last week's school's papers on
the seats, shoes under the dashand forgotten coffee cups in
every single cup holder.
It might not seem like a bigdeal, but you're right, oh girl,
it can either rev you up or runyou down.
(12:24):
That mess sets the tone beforethe day even starts and it
travels with you Kids soaking inyour stress, everyone feeling
the frenzy, and mama alreadymaxed out before she hits the
first red light.
You see, your car isn't justtransportation, it's a mobile
mood setter.
Have you ever thought about itthat way?
(12:45):
And it's not just what's aroundyou, it's also what's left
unsaid.
Sometimes clutter shows up inthe silence the unspoken
apologies, the emotional buildupfrom the things we haven't
processed, the tension betweenyou and your child's father that
fills every exchange withfriction.
(13:08):
Leaving things unsaid is a formof clutter too, and it takes up
space in your spirit untilthere's no room for peace to
land like an airplane.
You see, you're not justcleaning for today, you are
leading for tomorrow, and that'swhat I want you to think about
as we look ahead.
Every time you leave somethingundone, it's more than just a
(13:31):
mess, it can become a model.
Remember, you got your kiddoswith you right.
So what your kids see youtolerate, they begin to
replicate.
Chaos then becomes normal,clutter becomes comfortable,
avoidance becomes automatic.
But when they see you makingspace mentally, emotionally and
(13:55):
spiritually, they learn thatpeace is possible and it
certainly is worth protecting,is possible and it certainly is
worth protecting.
Ladies.
Your kids are learning what tocarry and what to clear based on
how you move through your mess.
Create a new rhythm that keepsthe chaos out.
So listen, all hope is not losthere.
(14:16):
You don't need a Pinterestperfect system, color-coded bins
or a professional organizer tofind your peace.
You just need a rhythm thatworks for your life.
It is your drum.
You are going to dance to thebeat of your own Because, let's
be real, you can Marie Kondoyour closet in one weekend, but
(14:38):
if you don't set a rhythm forwhat comes in and what gets
dealt with, girl listen, youwill be back at square one
before the month is out.
So we are gonna go for rhythmover routine, and this is what I
mean.
Forget the rigid routines.
As a single mom, flexibility isyour superpower.
(14:59):
Instead, build rhythms, small,repeated actions that work with
your real schedule, not againstit.
Here's an example Sunday 15, 15minute reset.
Every Sunday night.
Fold what's left, prep your bagand clear the junk drawer.
(15:19):
15 minutes, that's it, not 16.
Two-minute toss.
If it takes under two minutesto deal with it, put it away,
wipe it down, delete the emailand do it now, and a digital
detox day.
Pick one day a week to clearyour inbox, delete screenshots
and cancel subscriptions you'renot using but you are paying for
(15:42):
somehow.
And then also monthly margincheck Once a month, ask what's
taking up time, space or energythat I didn't invite in.
And if you need to put that ona post-it note or make a
reminder or set an alarm on yourphone, girl, you need to do
that once a month.
Do not overlook that step, yousee, because peace doesn't come
(16:05):
from perfection, it comes fromintention.
Show up with a little regularly, and then it adds up to a lot.
And let's not forget boundaries.
Boundaries are the gatekeepersto your peace.
You see, a new rhythm meanssome things and some people
won't make the cut, and that'snot petty, it is protective.
(16:28):
Set time limits on scrolling.
Say no to the 14th request tovolunteer if it costs you your
sanity.
Stop letting clutter, physicalor emotional.
Move in without paying rent.
You see, you can't keep peacein your home if you keep saying
yes to everything that steals itand make it visual.
(16:51):
Listen, you don't need anothercalendar, you need some clarity.
So how about you try this?
Post a sticky note on thefridge.
I'm sure you got many, butlet's make this one the central
focus here and put on it onething today that brings peace,
that's it Every time you openthat fridge door.
One thing that brings me peace.
(17:11):
That is what you should belooking at, that's your
intention, that's your boundary.
That starts to set your rhythm.
Then, next, I want you to writeyour weekly rhythm on a
chalkboard or a dry erasecalendar for the kids to see and
let them help.
Something else you could do youcould create what I would call
a drop zone.
It's a basket by the door sochaos doesn't pile up on the
(17:32):
kitchen table.
Listen, ladies, when peace isvisible, it becomes possible.
You're not just creating calm,you are creating a culture.
Here, mama, your rhythm, itbecomes your legacy.
You're not just cleaning aspace, you're shaping the
(17:53):
environment your kids will growin and one day recreate.
What you clear today createsthe culture your kids carry
tomorrow.
So, in closing, this isn't justabout clean counters, it's
about a clear you, ladies.
This isn't just about gettingyour space spotless, it's about
(18:16):
getting your spirit still, and Ihope you're already starting to
feel that.
When your home breathes, youbreathe.
When your car is calm, yourthoughts well.
They drive just a littlestraighter when your inbox,
emotions and schedule have roomto stretch.
You show up present, notpanicked.
(18:39):
You're not being selfish,listen, you're being wise and
you're not being picky.
You're being intentional.
You're not wasting time.
Think of it rather, as you areinvesting it and there's a
payoff.
The payoff is that you'll stopfeeling like you're constantly
behind.
You'll find more time for peace, more energy for things that
(19:03):
matter.
You'll model a lifestyle ofclarity and care that your kids
can carry into their futurehomes and hearts.
Peace, yeah, it doesn't startin your prayer closet if your
pantry's making you panicSometimes.
Clearing clutter is the mostspiritual thing you can do.
(19:25):
So here's a little homeworkcall to action I have for you
here at the end of the podcast.
So here is some soul work.
So you need to grab yourThriving 25 journal now and ask
yourself what's one physicalspace that stresses you out
every day?
Start there and clean it,declutter it and reclaim it.
(19:47):
Two, what's one mental oremotional space that needs some
margin?
Do you need to unsubscribe,delete or forgive?
And three, what rhythm can youcreate to keep that piece going?
Remember, little steps, bigshift.
And if you're up for a littleextra credit, I have a bonus
(20:09):
challenge for you Clean yourentry point, your porch, your
doorway, your car or even yourcloset.
Snap a pic before and thenafter.
Then share your win on ourprivate.
It's a Single Mom Thing Facebookgroup with the hashtag clear
space, clear mind, and let'scheer each other on so as we
(20:29):
connect and go deeper.
I want to encourage you to jointhe Facebook community.
You're not meant to do thisalone, so post your progress,
your prayers and your porchplants pics with us.
Subscribe on Apple Podcasts,spotify or iHeart Radio so you
don't miss the next step in yourThrive in 25 journey.
Want more tools and truth?
Visit shepherdsvillagecom.
(20:51):
Forward slash classes for freeresources, upcoming classes and
your road to single mom successNeed prayer.
Our 24-7 prayer line is alwaysopen at 855-822-PRAY.
And, mamas, before you go, I'vegot a bonus for you.
Stay tuned for a scriptural micdrop from one of the incredible
(21:11):
IRCS high school students whoserved at Shepherd's Village a
couple weeks ago.
This student recorded a powerfulword of encouragement just for
you, because every mom needs areminder that she's not alone in
the mess or the mission so, onthe heels of that reminder, this
(21:53):
week I want you to do one thingyour soul is craving most
Making space.
Speaker 1 (21:59):
Because you don't just need less stuff, you need
more room for joy.
Have a wonderful week andremember it's a single mom thing
and not the single thing thatstops you.
Thanks for listening to.
It's a Single Mom Thing.
I hope you enjoyed our timetogether.
If you have more questions onhow to have a relationship with
Jesus or need prayer, visit usat wwwshepherdsvillagecom.
(22:25):
Backslash prayer.
For more information andresources, check out our show
notes.
Welcome to it's a Single Mom Thing, the show for
single moms by single moms.
This is Sherri, your host, andI am happy you are here today.
Remember it's a single momthing and not the single thing
that stops you.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Ever walk into a room and forget while you're there,
only to trip over a laundrybasket and realize, oh yeah, I
was headed for a nervousbreakdown.
Yeah, I've been there.
If your home looks like abefore photo on a cleaning show
and your mind feels just asmessy, well, this episode is for
you, because here's the truthClutter isn't just what's on
(00:40):
your countertops, it's what'scrowding your thoughts, draining
your energy and stealing yourpeace.
And as single moms, well, wecarry a lot, too much sometimes,
and the last thing we need isthe chaos in our space, making
us feel like chaos inside.
And here's what you don't know,I'm guessing.
(01:02):
According to PrincetonNeuroscience Institute, physical
clutter competes for yourbrain's attention, reduces focus
, increases stress and can eventrigger procrastination.
Yeah, that overflowing closet.
It's not just annoying, it'sactually rewiring your brain for
anxiety and fatigue.
(01:23):
Now, I don't know about you,but I have that one closet that
I haven't gotten to that givesme a panic attack every time I
open it.
You know the one that youeither can't shut once you open
it, or you open it and you haveto duck and cover for fear what
might fall out.
Yeah, that one.
So if you've ever said, well,it's just stuff.
(01:47):
It's no big deal.
Today you are going to learnwhy it actually is a big deal.
But here's the good news youcan take back your space and
your sanity with small changesthat create big shifts, changes
(02:09):
that create big shifts.
We're talking how to simplifyyour space, how to detox your
mind and how to invite God intoboth your home and heart so you
can breathe again.
This isn't about perfection.
It's about simply peace, andpeace doesn't start when your
laundry is folded.
It starts when you make roomfor what matters and let go of
what doesn't.
So grab your thriving 25journal, pull your hair into a
(02:34):
messy bun and let's declutterour chaos together.
One drawer, one thought and oneprayer at a time.
Clutter isn't just on the floor, it's in your life.
So let's go beyond the laundry,okay?
Because clutter.
It doesn't stop at youroverflowing hamper or the
(02:54):
half-eaten chicken nuggets onyour couch.
It's sneaky.
It hides in your routines, yourthoughts, your finances, and
it's robbing your peace.
So let's call it what it isChaos disguised, as I'll get to
it later or control disguised aspeace.
(03:16):
What does your kitchencountertop look like right now?
If I had to go to your house,what would I see?
Is the cereal still out fromthis morning?
Is last night's dinner stuck tothe plate like it's auditioning
for a construction job?
What about your bedroom?
Is it a rest zone or a laundryavalanche?
Do you have to high step itthrough piles just to hit the
(03:36):
pillow?
How about your car?
Does it smell like Chick-fil-Anuggets and some defeat?
Is your digital life clutteredtoo?
Texts you're dodging, emailsyou've ignored, I don't know.
Does your email inbox look liketwo unread messages or 2,781?
What about that text youhaven't responded to, or the one
(03:59):
you shouldn't respond toanymore?
Is your bank account acluttered trail of
treat-yourself stress purchasesand overdraft fees?
What about your relationships?
Are there any messy emotionalcorners you have just closed the
door on?
But on the flip side, maybe,your house is spotless.
(04:22):
Everything has a place, thetowels are folded into thirds,
the throw pillows are fluffedand not a single dish dares to
live in your sink.
But let me ask you this Is yourspace perfectly tidy because
you never let anyone in?
Is your house a showroom?
Because it's the one area youcan control.
(04:45):
So here's a little sassy truthbomb I want to drop on you.
You could be drowning inclutter or drowning in control.
Either way, baby, you can'tbreathe.
So we need to do a little faithcheck here for a moment.
And we're going to find that inProverbs 4.23.
And it says, above all else,guard your heart, for everything
(05:08):
you do flows from it.
So how about we reframe the wordclutter?
Because I don't like that word.
I don't know about you.
Clutter, well, it's anythingthat crowds your space and your
spirit, my sister.
It's anything that steals yourpeace and hides your purpose
under a pile of noise.
(05:28):
It doesn't just live on yourfloor, it lives in your mindset,
your money or even your margins.
So this is more about cleaningIf you haven't noticed this
episode.
It's about clearing the way forclarity, peace and purpose to
rise back up in your life.
Would you like some of that?
So here are some realreflection questions that I want
(05:50):
you to start asking yourself.
What space in your life feelschaotic, not just messy?
What are you trying to controlso tightly because everything
else feels out of control?
And have you confused yourselfor convinced yourself that this
is just how life is right?
Now you see, whether it'sclutter you can see or clutter
(06:12):
you've buried deep.
It's taking up space that Godwants to fill with peace.
So let's start making some room.
Start small, think big.
So let's be honest, ladies,rome wasn't cleaned in a day,
and neither is your life, yourhouse or even your headspace.
(06:32):
But the biggest transformations,yeah, those don't start with a
full sweep.
They start with a single step.
Start with, let's say, forexample, one drawer, one surface
, one mindset, because when youstart small, well, you're more
likely to finish.
You build momentum, thenmotivate, you train your brain
(06:55):
to recognize progress overperfection.
You see small steps, well, theyequal big shifts.
You start to clear your kitchencounter.
Now you've made space tonourish yourself again.
You see, when you clean outyour purse, hello, peace of mind
, and that missing debit cardthat you couldn't find.
You see, when you unsubscribefrom 30 emails that you never
(07:18):
read, that's 30 less digitaldistractions stealing your time.
Or how about archiving thattext thread from someone who
drains your joy, girl?
That's some mad freedom rightthere.
And if it's not a drawer, maybeit's a decision.
Maybe it looks likeunsubscribing from a person who
has been living rent-free inyour head, or deleting the
(07:42):
photos that take you back toplaces you no longer live,
physically or emotionally, oreven creating margin by doing
nothing at all, because, listen,sometimes self-care isn't a
task, it's a time out.
You see, this isn't aboutspring cleaning, it's about soul
(08:02):
clearing.
And for my overwhelmed queens,listen, if this feels like too
much and you're ready to shutoff the show, then maybe your
small step today, and today only, is a sacred pause.
You don't have to do anythingto be worthy of some breathing
room.
Build in margin, not becauseyou've earned it, because,
(08:25):
listen, girl, you need it.
You see, pause, it is aproductive word when it makes
space for peace.
And so here's a little personalreflection from my own life.
Just recently, when I discoveredflow over force you see, I've
been renting this headspace justthis week, you see, everything
(08:47):
in my life it felt loud, chaotic, cluttered and completely
overwhelming.
Every space I looked atscreamed for attention and I
didn't have any more to give.
I didn't have any more to give.
Maybe you can relate.
For me, I realized I needed toshift from force to flow.
(09:07):
Instead of pushing through, Igave myself simply a timeout,
and for me that meant one thingthe front porch, it's my entry
point, both literally andmentally.
It sets the tone for how I showup in my day.
And when I finally sat stilllong enough to notice I saw my
(09:30):
garden had become a metaphor formy life.
Maybe you have seen this inyour own Weeds growing, wild,
dead plants hanging on from aseason that had already passed
Messy, frustrating, invisible toanyone passing by.
So I got my hands dirty, notwith just a big plan, just a
(09:50):
moment of motion.
I cleared the weeds, pulledwhat no longer belonged and
slowly the chaos it started toshrink.
Then I did one more thing.
I added some color.
I went to the store and pickedup a few vibrant, affordable
plants, just those small pops oflife.
(10:11):
They shifted my whole point ofview.
You see, sometimes the biggesttransformation doesn't start
inside, it starts right outsideyour front door.
And once I cleared that space,listen, something happened.
I've realized I could move onto another unattended garden in
(10:32):
my life.
That needed some TLC too.
Clear space equals a clear mind.
Have you ever walked into amessy room and instantly felt
intense, scattered or evensnappy?
That's not just a mood, it's ascience.
Clutter isn't neutral, it'snoisy.
(10:53):
Now studies have shown thatphysical clutter increases
cortisol levels that's yourstress hormone and it makes it
harder for your brain to focus,process or even rest.
And let's be honest, singlemoms already have enough tabs
open in their minds, am I right?
We don't need extra chaoscoming from the corner of the
(11:17):
counter too.
Here's something else.
Clutter isn't just stuff, it isstories.
That pile of mail on the end ofyour countertop yeah, that
might be bills that you areavoiding.
Or that overstuffed closet itmight be full of clothes from
your version of you that doesn'tfit you anymore, physically or
emotionally.
And that junk drawer, alsoknown as the catch-all drawer
(11:41):
yeah, it might be the one thingyou feel like you can hide when
everything else feels exposed.
You see, when your environmentis chaotic, your thoughts well,
they follow suit.
But when you create clear space, ooh girl, your soul can
finally exhale.
And I'm not done here.
Let's talk about that car.
(12:02):
Ever try starting the day witha cluttered car?
Fast food bags on the floor,last week's school's papers on
the seats, shoes under the dashand forgotten coffee cups in
every single cup holder.
It might not seem like a bigdeal, but you're right, oh girl,
it can either rev you up or runyou down.
(12:24):
That mess sets the tone beforethe day even starts and it
travels with you Kids soaking inyour stress, everyone feeling
the frenzy, and mama alreadymaxed out before she hits the
first red light.
You see, your car isn't justtransportation, it's a mobile
mood setter.
Have you ever thought about itthat way?
(12:45):
And it's not just what's aroundyou, it's also what's left
unsaid.
Sometimes clutter shows up inthe silence the unspoken
apologies, the emotional buildupfrom the things we haven't
processed, the tension betweenyou and your child's father that
fills every exchange withfriction.
(13:08):
Leaving things unsaid is a formof clutter too, and it takes up
space in your spirit untilthere's no room for peace to
land like an airplane.
You see, you're not justcleaning for today, you are
leading for tomorrow, and that'swhat I want you to think about
as we look ahead.
Every time you leave somethingundone, it's more than just a
(13:31):
mess, it can become a model.
Remember, you got your kiddoswith you right.
So what your kids see youtolerate, they begin to
replicate.
Chaos then becomes normal,clutter becomes comfortable,
avoidance becomes automatic.
But when they see you makingspace mentally, emotionally and
(13:55):
spiritually, they learn thatpeace is possible and it
certainly is worth protecting,is possible and it certainly is
worth protecting.
Ladies.
Your kids are learning what tocarry and what to clear based on
how you move through your mess.
Create a new rhythm that keepsthe chaos out.
So listen, all hope is not losthere.
(14:16):
You don't need a Pinterestperfect system, color-coded bins
or a professional organizer tofind your peace.
You just need a rhythm thatworks for your life.
It is your drum.
You are going to dance to thebeat of your own Because, let's
be real, you can Marie Kondoyour closet in one weekend, but
(14:38):
if you don't set a rhythm forwhat comes in and what gets
dealt with, girl listen, youwill be back at square one
before the month is out.
So we are gonna go for rhythmover routine, and this is what I
mean.
Forget the rigid routines.
As a single mom, flexibility isyour superpower.
(14:59):
Instead, build rhythms, small,repeated actions that work with
your real schedule, not againstit.
Here's an example Sunday 15, 15minute reset.
Every Sunday night.
Fold what's left, prep your bagand clear the junk drawer.
(15:19):
15 minutes, that's it, not 16.
Two-minute toss.
If it takes under two minutesto deal with it, put it away,
wipe it down, delete the emailand do it now, and a digital
detox day.
Pick one day a week to clearyour inbox, delete screenshots
and cancel subscriptions you'renot using but you are paying for
(15:42):
somehow.
And then also monthly margincheck Once a month, ask what's
taking up time, space or energythat I didn't invite in.
And if you need to put that ona post-it note or make a
reminder or set an alarm on yourphone, girl, you need to do
that once a month.
Do not overlook that step, yousee, because peace doesn't come
(16:05):
from perfection, it comes fromintention.
Show up with a little regularly, and then it adds up to a lot.
And let's not forget boundaries.
Boundaries are the gatekeepersto your peace.
You see, a new rhythm meanssome things and some people
won't make the cut, and that'snot petty, it is protective.
(16:28):
Set time limits on scrolling.
Say no to the 14th request tovolunteer if it costs you your
sanity.
Stop letting clutter, physicalor emotional.
Move in without paying rent.
You see, you can't keep peacein your home if you keep saying
yes to everything that steals itand make it visual.
(16:51):
Listen, you don't need anothercalendar, you need some clarity.
So how about you try this?
Post a sticky note on thefridge.
I'm sure you got many, butlet's make this one the central
focus here and put on it onething today that brings peace,
that's it Every time you openthat fridge door.
One thing that brings me peace.
(17:11):
That is what you should belooking at, that's your
intention, that's your boundary.
That starts to set your rhythm.
Then, next, I want you to writeyour weekly rhythm on a
chalkboard or a dry erasecalendar for the kids to see and
let them help.
Something else you could do youcould create what I would call
a drop zone.
It's a basket by the door sochaos doesn't pile up on the
(17:32):
kitchen table.
Listen, ladies, when peace isvisible, it becomes possible.
You're not just creating calm,you are creating a culture.
Here, mama, your rhythm, itbecomes your legacy.
You're not just cleaning aspace, you're shaping the
(17:53):
environment your kids will growin and one day recreate.
What you clear today createsthe culture your kids carry
tomorrow.
So, in closing, this isn't justabout clean counters, it's
about a clear you, ladies.
This isn't just about gettingyour space spotless, it's about
(18:16):
getting your spirit still, and Ihope you're already starting to
feel that.
When your home breathes, youbreathe.
When your car is calm, yourthoughts well.
They drive just a littlestraighter when your inbox,
emotions and schedule have roomto stretch.
You show up present, notpanicked.
(18:39):
You're not being selfish,listen, you're being wise and
you're not being picky.
You're being intentional.
You're not wasting time.
Think of it rather, as you areinvesting it and there's a
payoff.
The payoff is that you'll stopfeeling like you're constantly
behind.
You'll find more time for peace, more energy for things that
(19:03):
matter.
You'll model a lifestyle ofclarity and care that your kids
can carry into their futurehomes and hearts.
Peace, yeah, it doesn't startin your prayer closet if your
pantry's making you panicSometimes.
Clearing clutter is the mostspiritual thing you can do.
(19:25):
So here's a little homeworkcall to action I have for you
here at the end of the podcast.
So here is some soul work.
So you need to grab yourThriving 25 journal now and ask
yourself what's one physicalspace that stresses you out
every day?
Start there and clean it,declutter it and reclaim it.
(19:47):
Two, what's one mental oremotional space that needs some
margin?
Do you need to unsubscribe,delete or forgive?
And three, what rhythm can youcreate to keep that piece going?
Remember, little steps, bigshift.
And if you're up for a littleextra credit, I have a bonus
(20:09):
challenge for you Clean yourentry point, your porch, your
doorway, your car or even yourcloset.
Snap a pic before and thenafter.
Then share your win on ourprivate.
It's a Single Mom Thing Facebookgroup with the hashtag clear
space, clear mind, and let'scheer each other on so as we
(20:29):
connect and go deeper.
I want to encourage you to jointhe Facebook community.
You're not meant to do thisalone, so post your progress,
your prayers and your porchplants pics with us.
Subscribe on Apple Podcasts,spotify or iHeart Radio so you
don't miss the next step in yourThrive in 25 journey.
Want more tools and truth?
Visit shepherdsvillagecom.
(20:51):
Forward slash classes for freeresources, upcoming classes and
your road to single mom successNeed prayer.
Our 24-7 prayer line is alwaysopen at 855-822-PRAY.
And, mamas, before you go, I'vegot a bonus for you.
Stay tuned for a scriptural micdrop from one of the incredible
(21:11):
IRCS high school students whoserved at Shepherd's Village a
couple weeks ago.
This student recorded a powerfulword of encouragement just for
you, because every mom needs areminder that she's not alone in
the mess or the mission so, onthe heels of that reminder, this
(21:53):
week I want you to do one thingyour soul is craving most
Making space.
Speaker 1 (21:59):
Because you don't just need less stuff, you need
more room for joy.
Have a wonderful week andremember it's a single mom thing
and not the single thing thatstops you.
Thanks for listening to.
It's a Single Mom Thing.
I hope you enjoyed our timetogether.
If you have more questions onhow to have a relationship with
Jesus or need prayer, visit usat wwwshepherdsvillagecom.
(22:25):
Backslash prayer.
For more information andresources, check out our show
notes.
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