Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
It's everyday with
John and Jay.
Comedy Skits, random bullshit,tim and Jerry, it's not your day
(01:02):
, it's not my day.
This is our day and it's my day.
This is our day and it's everyday with John and Jay.
You like racy shit, you likeproblems going on, you like
sexual misconduct?
You're in the right fuckingplace.
Listen up, you fucking freaks.
(01:22):
It is time to get the show onthe road.
We're ready to hit this episodeof it's every day with john and
aj.
Let's rock.
Welcome, welcome.
Welcome to a another episodefucking three.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
welcomes, welcome,
welcome to another episode,
fucking three welcomes you luckybastards Welcome welcome,
welcome, that's all you get.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
I usually get a dirty
glare when I come over to
John's, that's right.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Actually, I got to
keep Jason in a whole different
wing of my home because heoffends us, because I'm black.
Because Jason is secretly black.
Everybody he, rosa Parks, myass.
Yeah, she sat her tire blackass down.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
That's all she did.
Dude, I saw a meme today.
Have you seen that meme?
Where it shows a basketballteam or whatever, and five of
them are so dark, black, and itsays I got five more characters
to unlock.
I don't think I've seen that,dude.
Let me see if I can find it onmy phone.
I've got to show John this Dudeit's five black kids on the
(02:26):
team and they're so dark, likeI'm talking like midnight dark
and Did you see the HappyGilmore 2 trailer?
Speaker 2 (02:38):
by the way, not the
newest one, but yeah, there's a
newer one that just came outPretty much gives away the whole
movie.
Fyi, if you really want to seeit.
Pretty much, I think you'vejust, in my opinion, I think you
pretty much just watched thewhole movie in this trailer.
Okay, I get it now because,like they're unlockable, yeah,
(02:59):
they look like like like thefucking uh silhouettes.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
That's what they look
like.
No, I have not watched the newtrailer.
Do you want to watch it?
Speaker 2 (03:08):
If you want.
I have to tell you what.
If you don't want spoilers, Iwould not watch it.
If you don't care about that,you're going to watch it anyway.
Okay, let's go Alrighty.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
I'm going to watch it
anyway.
My name is Happy Gilmore.
I think I might have seen thisone 30 years ago.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
I decided to give
golf a try.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
But even when you're
at the top of your game that's
me golfing.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
You can always shank
one.
Happy Gilmore sucks.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Oh, eat a bag of how
are you going to put Vienna
through ballet school?
It's $75,000 a year.
That's four years, that's 333.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
John daly, that's
okay.
If john daly's not a main, hewon't be, I think it's just a
cameo.
But if john daly is a maincharacter in this movie, I'm
gonna fucking love that.
I love john.
If john daly's like one of hisbest friends in the movie,
that's so awesome, because JohnDaly's the fucking man.
Terrible math, johnny.
It's 300 grand.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
I wouldn't even know
where to start.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Let them see the
happy I fell in love with Is
that the same girl?
Speaker 1 (04:15):
Is that the same
woman?
Ah, maybe God, she's hot,there's no way, that's the same.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Let me see, dude,
what's her face time to do some
research yeah, I saw this andI'm like that's not the original
girl, is it?
I think?
Speaker 1 (04:33):
is it I?
Speaker 2 (04:33):
think it might be.
I mean, I don't, I can't tellyeah, she's back in it.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
Julie bowen, that is
her.
Okay, holy shit, yeah, she justlooks.
She just smoke show, dude.
She looks like way hotter nowthan she did back then.
Oh, she's seasoned like JulieBowen.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
That is her okay.
Holy shit, she just smokeshowed, dude.
She looks way hotter now thanshe did back then.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
She's seasoned like a
fine wine.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
You gotta do it Dad.
Let's go, let's go get him Dad.
I know how to do it Dad.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
So real note, this
guy right here, that's that MJF
guy that I showed you a fewweeks ago, that guy from that
wrestler.
He's that I showed you a fewweeks ago.
That guy from that wrestler,he's one of Happy Gilmore's sons
.
I think, oh, this is that guy,that guy did the elbow.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
Oh, it's like his
real daughter, it kind of does.
He's breaking in to get anothercaddy you just met.
All right, we're going to go.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
But you bring those.
Speaker 1 (05:27):
They're redoing the
caddy doesn't always doing Joe
Happy Gilmore didn't have thingsflowing on the first, oh yeah.
Check out the name tag grandson, you're in my, I'm gonna go
there reprise.
Everyone is talking about yourcomeback, kid Happy.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Gilmore, happy
Gilmore.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
Happy.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Gilmore.
We've been watching you play MrGilmore so inspiring.
My dad loved you, man.
I am so sorry, Get on here Igot some Gorilla Glue.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
Come on, remember the
happy place I went to you.
Go to yours, yeah, because youknow wooden hands are hereditary
.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
You didn't know that.
Oh yes, oh, my God, roryJackass, bingo Woo, jack
Nicholson, you stole my lifefrom me.
Why would I want to steal thelife of somebody who eats pieces
of shit for breakfast?
Speaker 1 (06:37):
You know what this is
?
This looks like if you tookHappy Gilmore and threw it into
a nursing home His quips andstuff Like dude.
What made the pieces of shitfor breakfast thing so funny it?
Speaker 2 (06:47):
was so spot.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
It was fast and quick
yeah now they're like pieces of
shit for breakfast.
I'll see that joke is likeremember this member bear?
Speaker 2 (06:54):
it's just a big
member berry, so you're like
remember this joke, that'spieces of shit for breakfast.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
This is a nostalgia
writing movie.
That's what it is, but it'sfree on netflix.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
I'm gonna watch it of
course, like I'm not, it's
smart to put it on netflix,because I can't imagine being in
theaters and doing relativelyanything at the box office, is
it netflix owned by happymadison by now?
Speaker 1 (07:16):
is it has to be
because, dude, all of adam
sailor movies go on netflix.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
Apparently eminem's
in this movie too.
Evidently it's some some way.
I hate that.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
I hate the fact that
he's throwing all these like
real-time.
I don't like the real-timegolfer shit.
I don't like it in here, Idon't.
I hate it.
I think the first one was great, because none of the?
Because, dude, they had famousgolfers back then but they
didn't put any of them in there.
I mean, lee trevino made it ohlee trevino, trevino, yeah, but
he looked like.
He looked like fucking.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
He looked like
Lieutenant Harris.
Speaker 3 (07:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
The only time I kind
of liked Things like that was
like At Talladega Nights.
They kind of they sprinkled insome real nasty, oh, like Dale
Earnhardt Jr asking for anautograph.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
But it was a cameo.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
It was a quick thing,
it was kind of funny.
And this is just like realgolfers, everybody.
That's the joke.
They're real people.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Yeah, it's not like
he was playing against fucking
Jack Nicklaus back in the day.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Jack Nicklaus made it
kid.
Did you see Jack Nicklaus inthis?
Yeah, like.
Okay, jack Nicklaus is likeyeah, I got nothing better to do
.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Geriatric fuck.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Geriatric fuck, I
love.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
Jack Nichols.
He's an amazing dude.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
The only time I would
be okay with it is say like so
he used.
So Happy Madison, you know,used Rex Ryan and not himself.
Was it him?
No, it wasn't himself, he wasthe lawyer.
So he, that was a real coach asa different character.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
but they did the joke
where, oh man, where he liked
the Patriots.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
He liked the Patriots
and he was a Jets coach.
He was a Jets coach.
He was the coach of the Jetsduring camera gate, you know,
when the Patriots got caughtfilming the Jets' practice and
shit and he was.
That was a whole controversy.
Don't mess with the genius.
Don't mess with the genius.
Hey, don't mess with my TomBrady poster.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
Look at that jawline
Probably one of the best jokes,
like in a movie created.
That was it right there.
Like having Rex Ryan, they'd belike that's funny because that
makes, because people willrecognize.
They'd be like John Harbaughbeing a fucking Ohio State fan.
Yeah, I would fucking laugh myass off it would.
(09:29):
He'd be disowned.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
It's jokes like now
if John Daly, if he's playing
himself, fine, but if it's justgoing to be, he needs to be the
one-off best friend.
He befriends John Daly becausethey're kind of not the same
person but they're that kind ofoff-kilter, um, enigmatic, uh,
(09:53):
maverick kind of people.
You know that.
Or they just kind of do whatthey fucking want to do alan
cover.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
How's alan cover not
in this movie?
And the thing is what reallybothers me as before he was up
as a caddy.
Well, he was the caddy, butlike alan cover, maybe like, and
even then maybe getting anotherbum to be your fucking caddy or
something, I don't know theytook that joke and they made it
way worse.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
They're like jeffy
gober has another caddy he's
trying out.
Remember remember the firstmovie?
The caddy didn't really knowwhat he was doing because he was
a bum.
Remember it's like no, that wasfunny, because he was a bum and
he just kind of like went withit and it worked great and first
of all, it showed HappyGilmore's like humility.
(10:36):
Yeah, it's like he just like oh.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
He had a humanitarian
side.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
Yeah, it's like oh,
there's an old guy out here, or
there's a guy homeless oh, he'sjust doing his job, his job.
Yeah, leave him alone.
Now they're like taking thatjoke and just flipping it on its
head and like remember,remember the candy.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
He didn't know the
candy and then like my uh, I
don't know man, it's just to me,it just I think this movie is
going to be a straight up try to.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
It's going to be
another anchorman to force the
humor kind of shit, that movieso much you know it's easy for
me to say that about.
And here's me, like you know,dusting the, you know fucking
slobbing on the guild ofghostbusters and shit, but to me
, like I just can't stand thesefucking movies ghostbusters
wasn't a redo of the like.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
I get it.
They're doing the same thing,they're busting ghosts, whatever
, but it's not.
Each of them are differentstandalone stories, dude.
You can watch one, two or three, four or whatever, yeah,
whereas, whereas anchorman, dude, like the same movie took off,
yeah, like it was set after thesecond one, and it was just what
the fuck is, you know, and ittook it's such a it's just a
(11:45):
half-assed hair braid setup forthis movie.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
It's like, oh happy,
gilmer has a daughter and he
wants to put her through danceschool and if?
Speaker 1 (11:51):
anchorman was the
first movie, I would have hated
anchorman.
If anchorman 2 was the firstmovie, I would have hated
anchorman.
I would have been like nope,I'm good, you know, and I think
that's why will ferrell is verysmart for not making another
Step Brothers, becauseeverybody's asked him to.
He said no way, no way, no, youdo not.
Speaker 2 (12:10):
You just got to leave
these movies alone.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
It's like writing on
the coattails of nostalgia we
are.
Speaker 2 (12:15):
There's no original
ideas in Hollywood and honestly
I don't think that's necessarilyHollywood's fault.
That's just consumer thing.
People want to be reminded ofthings that they love, and the
thing about it is that whenoriginal ideas do come through
hollywood, it never does well atthe box office, does it do well
?
The only people want to see areare fucking marvel movies and
(12:36):
old nostalgia.
That's it.
That's all I want.
That's the sad tale of moviesthese days and I don't, and I'll
never go.
I'll never go voluntarily watcha fucking marvel movie.
I don't give a fuck how manythey pull that's.
That's the exception to therule, because it's taking the
piss out of marvel, which Ireally like.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
So it's makes fun of
disney and makes fun of disney
and marvel and dc and everything.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
It takes the piss out
of those movies, which is
fucking hilarious.
So that's why I like it so much, because it's just making fun
of the in-universe bullshit.
Because I fucking hate Marvel,I like X-Men and I like those
X-Men movies, but there wasn't acinematic universe.
Speaker 1 (13:13):
You like X-Men, like
trans women or?
Speaker 2 (13:15):
whatever X-Trans, men
don't even get started on it.
You imagine like Wolver, sheenWolver.
Sheen, wolver, sheen.
Don't even get started on it.
You imagine like Wolver-she,wolver-she, wolver-she,
wolver-she.
It's like nails are painted.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
Biclops, biclops.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Oh my god, they need
to change the gender fluid on
that one man.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
Yeast, yeast, yeast.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
Oh my god Banshee.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
Banshee yeah, dude.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
Oh, oh, man dude.
Yeah, it writes itself.
I love it.
Yeah, let's pitch it to fucking.
Who owns Marvel Disney?
Now, still, fuck, sounds great.
They'll make it too, becauseyou know Disney, they really
think outside the box withthings like that too.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
So but, uh, but
anyway uh yeah, we got a
different kind of show for youtoday.
We got some stuff we want we'regonna okay so a few.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
So this is episode
175 yes, back in 170 175
episodes, so we decided to goback into the archive 175th
anniversary weekly anniversaryso yeah, weekly anniversary.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
We're gonna go back
into the archive but we did a
show show back in August of lastyear, when I was on vacation.
John did a show where he justshowcased some of our sketches
from back in the day to relivethem and talk about them.
So we're going to do the samething today.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
I'm not going to tell
you what they are, I'm just
going to play them.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Oh, dude, I can't
wait, I love it.
Oh, fraggle rock, shut the fuckup.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
sprocket, sprocket,
you old cunt, you want some more
peanut butter some of theseolder ones are kind of quiet
because I couldn't.
The mix was kind of bad, a Alittle pee-pee popsicle there.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
huh, buddy, a little
pee-pee and jay a little pee-pee
and juice for you sprocket, youfucking douche dog.
That fucking douche dog, thedozers you fucking faggot.
Fuck your cares away.
Shoot her with another spray,Let the music play.
She can suck my cock.
(15:45):
Attention up there, dozers youfucking.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
You may hear me laugh
in the background.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Daring for another
day.
Suck my dick away.
Gonna suck my cock, fuck.
Who cares away?
Fucking for another day.
Let my dick go, spray All uponyour face.
Look out, gary,doo-dee-doo-dee-doo,
doo-dee-dum-dum, and I gottacome-come, doo-ba-doo-ba-doo.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
Look at the sound
effects.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Come-come-come,
doo-dum-dum-dum, doo-dum-dum-dum
, gonna come, gonna come, gonnacome, gonna come.
Speaker 3 (16:25):
Hey Taylor gets away
Fucking for another day.
Gonna bang your wife.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
Look, there's a
fucking fraggle.
Come over here, suck my fragglecock, na na na na na Banging on
your mama live Bang, bang, bang, bang.
(16:54):
Gonna suck my dick.
That's so good.
Second gonna come and spray onyour fucking ass.
If you suck my cock, fucking onthe spray.
Speaker 3 (17:07):
Gonna call me Jay
Fucking, suck my cock.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
Fucking suck my cock.
It's a fire goes.
Dozers you fucking faggots.
Dozers you fucking faggots.
Yeah, dude, what a they're likesome of the I love listening to
these going back and listen tothese old ones and we're looking
(17:35):
at john was pulling upeverything.
It is ridiculous how many skitsand shit we have saved in the
archives.
It is ridiculous.
Like right now I'm watching himscroll, so let's see how it is.
Oh my God.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
You.
Oh wait, I got a better way todo this.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Properties.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
So we've done 193.
So we've done 175 episodes, butwe have over 193 songs, so
we've probably we've done someincluding tim and jerry and
everything, or is that just no,this is just such a song.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
This is socks boot
folder holy shit.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
So we have 193.
So I think we've done some.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
Maybe we hit either a
haven't released, oh, man, or I
don't know, and I don't evenknow which one's like burning
for you oh yeah that, even thateven gets saved.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
That's so bad.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Uh, let's do another
one here there's one that was
gonna push, push me into thechurch, dude, that would have
been it, dude I'll do vlc.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
That way I could turn
it up a little more if it's
quiet, because some of theseearly ones I couldn't get mixed
really well.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
This is Love Bites.
Yeah, love Bites.
Speaker 3 (19:00):
Really long intro.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:10):
Try to stay quiet so
they don't hear me when I'm
outside.
Do they attract to me?
Don't want any bug bites.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
So when I hear this
on the radio, I sing this now.
Shut up, john.
So when I hear this on theradio, I sing this now, just
leave me alone.
Shut up, john.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Jump in the water
just to get them to leave.
But they come in swarm.
They want a piece of me.
Oh, ouch, ouch, that's four ofthem.
That's four of them, that'sfour of them.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
I didn't even catch
that.
Speaker 1 (19:49):
And I'm at home, Try
not to go outside or have to run
and hide.
Oh, come on, I don't want touse some oil baby To keep these
fucking bugs from eating me.
(20:11):
Maybe I know you think that I'mjust running back now.
I want to cover myself and tiemyself in a sack now.
I want to cover myself and tiemyself in a sack now.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
Bug bites.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
Bee stings.
Dude, it's so good, they'rebringing me to my knees.
Bug bites, bee stings.
It's no surprise.
Bug bites, bee stings.
It's no surprise.
Bug bites, be stings All overme.
Oh my God, god, these suck, youfucking assholes.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
You should wear some
off, maybe that'll help.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
Why do I have to do
it?
They suck Literally.
It's freaking titsy.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
When I wear long
sleeves.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Did you write this
one out, or was this off the
cuff one?
These early ones are so good.
There were some ones that wererough, but a lot of these were
fucking hilarious.
I wear shorts.
Speaker 1 (21:22):
as I jump off the
porch, they come after me.
I'm a smorgasbord.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
Oh damn.
Speaker 1 (21:32):
That's so good.
I don't want to be out here.
Unprotected Smorgasbord, that'sfucking good.
They're coming at me like afucking insect.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
Bug bites Bug bees,
bug bees.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
It's bringing me to
my knees.
Bug bites, bee stings.
It's no surprise.
Bug bites, bee stings.
What the fuck you bees Fuckingbees?
God damn, yeah, fuck the bees.
(22:13):
I can't go to a picnic withoutbeing accosted.
Dude, I could put sugar on theother side of the fucking place.
Man On the other side of thepavilion Fucking these goddamn
bugs and bees are just flyingaround me.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Dude, I could put
sugar on the other side of the
fucking place man On the otherside of the pavilion Fucking.
These goddamn bugs and bees arejust flying around me.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
Put some vinegar in a
cup or something Maybe that'll
attract them.
Speaker 2 (22:32):
I'll try that, we'll
try that I don't know.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
Man, I've almost
tried everything.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
I'm exhausted Eat a
bee suit or something dude.
Speaker 1 (22:39):
I don't want to go
outside and get chewed on up.
I even drink a little cup ofsugar-free 7-Up.
I hope that they don't see.
That doesn't prove that Ididn't write this out.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
Yeah, if there was
anything that proves that this
was off the cuff, that's rightthere.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
I'm going to break it
, which to me makes it funnier.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
Yeah, if there was
anything that proves that this
was off the cuff, that's rightthere.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
Which to me makes it
funnier.
They're fucking all over me.
Bug bites, be stings.
Oh my god, I love this so much.
Oh, bug bites, be stings.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
I wish I was better
at mixing this back Go to
anti-breed bug bites bee stings.
Speaker 1 (23:32):
It's no surprise bug
bites, bee stings Get them off
of me.
Speaker 3 (23:43):
Oh, I can't get them
off of me Fucking get them off
of me Please.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Quarter zone shot or
something.
Speaker 3 (23:50):
Fucking God damn.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
What are you doing
From my girl?
Speaker 3 (23:58):
What did you say?
What?
What did you say Dude, I missedthat, dude, the my girl thing,
I didn't hear it.
What?
Speaker 2 (24:03):
did you say what?
What'd you say dude?
I missed that Dude, the my Girlthing I didn't hear it.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Listen to this.
There's a lot of stings.
Dude, I feel like the kid frommy Girl.
My God, dude, fuck my Girl Dude.
That's hilarious man.
See, I know I like I.
I love our old shit.
Our old shit's so fun and a lot, like you said, a lot of it's
(24:31):
unscripted and it was uh, it wasoff the cuff.
So like a lot of times sarahwill ask me when she listens.
She'll be like is thisad-libbed?
A lot of times we used we wrotethem out, but most of the time
it is most of the time theshit's ad-libbed and you could
tell at the minor mess-ups, likefor a second I thought I wrote,
I think it makes it more.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
I think they it makes
it charming and it's a lot more
fun.
It's more funny yeah, like,yeah, you'll get maybe tighter
lyrics for writing it out, butjust making shit up is I think
it's, it's, it's unpredictableand it's.
I think it's just funnier,because comedy is sometimes it's
like that, you know like youknow ad-libbing stuff and uh,
(25:11):
who's like a who's line thing,you know whatever they call that
planetarium I can't wait forthat.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Dude.
I did it's gonna planetarium.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
I can't think of a
more wussy metal song in the
whole world than singing about aplanetarium, planetarium.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
Yeah, see them.
Planets Cost me threePlanetarium.
Speaker 2 (25:45):
Yeah, dude, that's
funny.
Speaker 1 (25:47):
That's going to be
our song next week.
I can't wait for that.
Speaker 2 (25:50):
But we are going to
take a break and we're going to
do a few more, but first a worlddebut on the podcast.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
You know what we
should do.
What's that?
Rather than taking a break, weshould jam your song okay, and
live with it.
All right.
So instead of taking a breaktoday, we are going to go live
with john's new song that hecreated so, and this is his
voice.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
It's not my voice.
No, it's not my voice, dude itwould have been funny like we're
like damn bro.
So no, it's not my voice, dude,it would have been funny like be
like damn bro so no, it'st-pain, it is, it is t-pain, I
got t-pain to do this track yeah, t-pain is now a metal singer
uh no, this was a ai metalproject I've been working on for
the last few months.
Uh, everything's written likethe lyrics and stuff are in the
(26:41):
concepts you come up with a nameyeah, the name everything,
everything's me uh, did you lookto see if there was another
band?
Speaker 1 (26:48):
I already did that
god, dude, you, we came up with.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
You came up with a
name that quick and you couldn't
our band dude, I knew you'regonna, okay, I knew you're gonna
say something about thatbecause you're like you the name
did.
You come up there like yeah,and it just, it just came to me.
It's well, okay.
So I went through like adictionary, like a dictionary,
but like I'm sitting there likeuh, looking at words that are
(27:10):
like nasty, like rotten orsomething, and then fermented
come, came up.
I'm like fermented.
I thought I was gonna call itfermented, but there's already
bad called fermented.
So I love alliteration, so Ilove to have like two Fs, like
Fear Factory.
So I'm like what can I put withfermented?
And I put like F words you knowwords demonic or F words that
(27:34):
are scary and then fear and I'mlike fermented fear that rolls
off the tongue.
It sounds good, sounds metal,and I was like is there?
I looked up on google and thereis no one else called that.
So and that took literallythree hours, a couple hours, to
(27:54):
figure out and it took a flipper.
It's about a dolphin who got aninfection on his flipper and
actually uh got gangrenous, soit fermented.
So that's what happened.
But no, we got into gangbehavior.
Gang into gangs.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
Uh, no, uh flipper
flipper throwing up gang signs.
He is a crip but he's out forblood so.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
So the good news is,
though, since I've been
practicing with this, I know howto like distribute music for
real.
So, because it's a, it's aprocess, so not a big one, but
but a process nonetheless.
So when we're ready for our,our band, I know how to do it,
and actually I paid for adistributor, because to get on
(28:43):
spotify, apple music, you got topay for a distributor.
I paid, I think, 39.95 for thewhole year and I get unlimited
songs to distribute to any allthe platforms.
So when we're ready to put upour shit, I got something all
ready to go.
That's awesome.
So I've been, so I've been kindof practicing with how to do
band stuff, even though this isan ai band.
It kind of it's kind ofpractice.
(29:03):
I'm kind of practicing with howto do band stuff, even though
this is an AI band.
I'm kind of practicing for whenwe do it with our stuff no,
it's cool man.
So this song is called Ashes ofSalem, and I was just thinking
of just metal shit to talk about, and Carrie was talking about
Salem.
I overheard her talking aboutit and I'm just like, oh dude,
(29:24):
witch trials, that sounds badass.
So I wrote this song, justbasically it's the.
The story behind the song isthat my metal lead her name's
veronica, by the way.
I gave her a name like somesort of sick and sell pervert oh
, dude, you're one of thosefucking, uh, waifu, fucking
people.
Speaker 1 (29:41):
Yeah, yeah, dude it's
fucking.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
Yeah, you know, like
who has like those stuff, who
has those, like those stuffedfucking girl like uh, waifu
girls, and so they, they havelike a hole in the crotch in the
area they.
They named them.
Yeah, so I didn't give.
I gave everybody a band name.
I basically based it off on allof us is the first names.
I didn't give them last namesweet.
So, veronica, veronica, wellwell, I think you're one of the
(30:07):
other guitar players.
Oh really, yeah, seriously cool.
So it's like jason, joe l andyeah, and john veronica's lead
so it's a five-piece band, so I,so I gave all of us the names
of my least chicken, so that.
So the song is basically aboutthe lead singer.
She's she, uh, through somesort of seance or through,
(30:33):
through the divine interventionof, of this witch, she witnesses
the salem witch trials, blackflame candle, and it's kind of
like that, except she getswhisked away like she, she.
I have a music video debutingon friday too, so, and I did it
all through ai, it's allanimated through ai, uh, it
looks pretty good.
I say about 90 of it looks good.
(30:55):
There's one little part that Ikind of want to redo, but it's
at this point, I've spent somuch time on it.
So anyway, this is FermentedFear, ashes of Salem and Jay.
I'll show you the rest of theEP later.
Speaker 3 (31:09):
For me, for me,
history will never erase me.
Speaker 1 (31:23):
Damn, I kick ass on
guitar.
You're awesome bro.
I'm alive.
Speaker 3 (31:36):
They came with fire
in their eyes, preaching fear
and calling it divine.
Pointed hands, sharpened lies.
Speaker 1 (31:51):
Truth was dropping in
their cries.
I was a healer.
The miracle came.
You felt the pain.
You felt the pain.
Speaker 3 (32:12):
I was a healer.
The miracle came.
Oh, you should hear some of theother songs need.
Now I rise from the smoke youmade Ashes of Salem.
(32:32):
I won't fade, bite my wrist,but you can't change truth.
Lies won't hold like a noose inyou.
I am the storm, I am the flame.
You cursed my blood, then spokemy name.
(32:54):
Burn the body, not the soul.
Your judgment never had control.
False gods robed in fear.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
You'll hear my voice
forever.
Yeah, I know how much you lovethose bass drops dude.
Speaker 3 (33:24):
It's just a bunch of
focus, focus.
Speaker 2 (33:29):
Oh, that boom.
Speaker 1 (33:30):
I know how much you
like those Fucking sonic booms,
dude.
I cannot wait to utilize those.
I know how much you love thosedude.
I think every beginning partshould have that Boom.
I would have it right there,Dude I fucking love that.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
I'll show you a
couple more songs.
Speaker 3 (33:57):
Oh my god, every
scream.
You buried in that place.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
Every scream you
dropped it in that closet.
You know what's kinda cool isdude.
What I was thinking is, likeyou said you made a music video
for this.
Yeah, we could make a fakemusic video for us.
Speaker 2 (34:20):
Yeah, we totally
could, bro, it'd be easy.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
Can we put our
likenesses in?
Yeah, 100%, oh, no shit, itjust looks like us, but it's
just a fucking badass musicvideo.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
So I could give
ChatGPT pictures of us and use
that as a reference, and it'llspit out that as a reference.
Speaker 1 (34:43):
That's so super cool.
But, dude, this song is legitand I love the mix of singing
and screaming.
Yeah, and the only thing that Iwould say that would be pretty
(35:05):
badass or like equal or make ita little bit better is, and the
only thing I could see is iswhen she's singing, having that
background screaming.
That's the only other thing,but it's tough.
Yeah, dude, I'm telling you whatdude.
There's something about havingthat you start singing and then,
as they're going into a corner,just fucking coming in, dude,
it's so fucking powerful.
I'm telling you what, dude.
There's something about havingthat you start singing and then,
as they're going into a chorus,just fucking coming in.
(35:25):
Dude, it's so fucking powerful,I'll show you Holy shit.
Speaker 2 (35:28):
I'll show you another
song that I did and I didn't
tell it to do this, because it'shard to layer vocals like that
with AI but it did it once andit was magical, and I'll show
you one of the songs that did it.
It only did it for one line andI'm like dude, that's fucking
(35:49):
awesome and I wish you could.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
I wish you could hone
it in more, but that's just a,
that's just the limitation of it, because I've been thinking
about that with our band andstuff and I thought about
because I know we've discussedbut we'd have to redo a lot of
shit and I don't know, I don'twant to really take the time to
fucking do that when we're soclose to recording and shit but
I thought about, like you know,having, like I know we talked
about having Alex do backupsinging or doing somebody doing
(36:10):
singing and stuff, and I'm like,but right now it's just, it's
kind of like right now we'redoing really well.
Speaker 2 (36:16):
I mean, maybe on the
next time we can bro you can,
bro, you could, you could layeryour vocals and you could do
that.
But when you're live, someoneelse will have to do it.
So like, oh, that's a good idea.
You know what I mean?
Like you could do both parts.
There's that you could do that,dude, I want to do that.
You could do both parts.
So if you want to like put,like, if you're at a clean part
(36:38):
and you want to put like someambient screaming in the
background and I don't know whatparts, I don't know if you have
that already, I don't think wehave anything I don't think, I
don't know if you have anythinglike that ready, like if you
know off the top of your head,with stuff we have already, you
know you could have, you can,you can layer your vocals and
honestly, he's probably gonnalayer your vocals anyway.
Speaker 1 (36:56):
Yeah, to make them
sound, make them sound, bigger
sound bad, plus my screamingdude.
Like, I hate screaming.
I love screaming live because Ithink my voice sounds pretty
good, but when I'm screaminginto the headset dude, it's
almost too, I'm almost afraid to, and that's one thing I would
tell him.
But like, listen, I'm gonnascream, dude, so hopefully you
got.
Speaker 2 (37:12):
Oh, he'll, he'll I
mean a good engineer will will
be which I think he is dude.
I think he's gonna be good dudeI can't wait he's probably
gonna have you.
Like I say he's gonna have avocal.
You know he's gonna have youlayer your vocals more likely,
because you're not just gonnatake one raw single, like he's
gonna have you do like onehigher, maybe one lower, I don't
whatever, whatever create.
A lot of times producers willgive you ideas for that sort of
(37:33):
thing where he'll hear, he'llhear your your take.
It'd be like oh, you know, it'dbe cool if you, we can, we'll
layer, we'll layer vocals here.
They may have Joe layer guitars.
You know, I don't know, that'sall true.
That'd be sweet.
I would assume that's whatthey're going to do.
You know, left channel is onetone, right channel is the other
(37:54):
one.
Speaker 1 (37:54):
I'd like to see if we
could put in some booms in
there.
I mean, that's definitely apossibility.
Speaker 2 (37:59):
Oh, sonic booms,
Probably when we're about to do
a breakdown, yeah yeah, that'sdefinitely doable.
Oh, so it's just.
Uh, he'll probably know whatthe fuck you're talking about,
so, but that'd be cool I meanI'm just glad, like, I'm just
happy to like we're.
We're up to a point wherefinally, we are maybe getting
(38:20):
something to fruition and Ithink it sounds like joe dude.
Speaker 1 (38:23):
For joe to not go to
cedar point and want to do that
is, uh, that's a pretty big step.
Yeah, I'm telling you what thisis one step closer to us
playing live, dude, and I, nojoke, I have all those things
typed up and saved on mycomputer.
Okay, dude, it is beautiful,okay, and then I've been writing
(38:43):
lyrics to our other songs, sowe're getting.
I'm getting there dude, okay,and I've been trying to do songs
without using the or trying notto look at the papers as much
yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:54):
So I'm trying to.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
I'm trying to get my
old ass brain fucking.
It's not.
I'm not a fucking flashcard guyanymore, dude, you know, for a
metalocalypse thing it's reallycool it is a metaloc, that's a.
Speaker 2 (39:10):
I'm glad that's a
great comparison because that's
kind of what I thought of thatand I thought of gorillas,
that's.
That's kind of what I'm goingfor is you know what?
I was good so I've been postingthis like all over, like tiktok
.
I actually got a littletraction on tiktok.
I've got like a bunch of likesand and followers and stuff
already, so that's a curve likewhat's your name.
(39:30):
I want to masturbate to youknow I, I thought of that too I
was like why foo, why foo?
so it's like I went on like asubreddit, like like a metal
subreddit, like metalcoresubreddit, because I was gonna
just post this everywhere.
Oh, that's not a good place togo.
It's so, it's so gatekeepy andpurist and it's like they, they
and I and I understand wherethey're coming from you should,
(39:52):
just you know what you should do, rather than debut it as yours.
You should be like dude, checkthis fucking band I found out,
so I'm not even calling it an aiband necessarily unless you're
looking for it because I put aiassisted in like a lot of the
bios, but at no point do I eversay I'll do so.
There's some other ai bandsthat I've been kind of looking
for comparison.
(40:13):
This one's actually really goodand I'm like I was kind of
jealous of this if I could findit.
Yeah, this, this, this dude,this is ai.
This is fucking pretty decentman and I was really jealous of
this.
Just the music video it's.
(40:33):
It's like black metal, gothstuff.
It's not like what I'm doing wowthe music video is amazing
silence screams behind the veil.
Speaker 3 (40:55):
Video is amazing.
Speaker 1 (40:57):
These tricks are
fucking hot.
That's what I said.
Speaker 2 (41:03):
It's like I'm fucking
the crow, or sting or sting, ha
ha, or sting or sting, ha ha.
But the AI music video isactually really decent.
Mine's okay.
It was a lot of trial and error, let's just say that.
Speaker 1 (41:24):
So yeah, dude, that's
fucking legit.
I thought this was good.
Speaker 2 (41:28):
So I was just looking
for like other AI metal bands
just to kind of just compare andcontrast.
There was another song that wasreally funny and it was about
like Raptors and shit.
These guys are like reallypopular Frostbite, orkings or
whatever they do like Nordicmetal.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
Yeah, oh, and they
look like fucking, they look
like shit off of what?
Speaker 2 (41:50):
do you call it
Fucking World of Warcraft?
World of Warcraft.
Yeah, I go well, I don't dothis kind of music, but it's
really.
I thought it's pretty decent.
Speaker 1 (42:09):
Fucking Amon Amar
shit.
It is Amon a mile.
Speaker 2 (42:11):
Yeah, like nordic
metal it's a badass sound and I
thought it was yeah, so Ithought that was really good.
There was one I found this isreally good.
I won't play it.
This is like, but they havelike.
This is like uh, what's thatband?
Night wish it?
This is like, but they havelike.
This is like uh, what's thatband Nightwish?
(42:32):
It's kind of like Nightwish ohgotcha.
It's kind of like Nightwish.
Gotha, you know, it's likeorchestra metal.
Speaker 1 (42:37):
It's apocalyptic.
Speaker 2 (42:38):
Apocalyptica
Nightwish there was one like and
it had like a dude on a fuckingraptor and it.
It was hilarious and I can'tremember He-Man and the Masters
of the Metalverse.
Speaker 3 (42:51):
I don't know what
that is.
What is this?
Speaker 2 (42:59):
What is this?
Oh my god, what He-Man, he-man,he-man, he-man.
Speaker 3 (43:10):
What the fuck Do it?
Master of Arms?
Speaker 1 (43:22):
His fucking mouth
doesn't even match Mine.
Does a little bit.
She-ra, beastman, dude, orca orwhatever.
Ha, ha.
Speaker 3 (43:47):
The fury of metal
Skeletor will face Our man
He-Man.
Speaker 1 (43:52):
He-Man Sounds like a
fucking song Gwar would sing.
Speaker 2 (43:56):
It is a Gwar song,
100%.
I was about to just Make thatcomparison, dude.
That's funny, but yeah, anyway.
Did you see Babymetal with Idid?
Did you watch that?
Yes, I did.
I fucking love that.
It was so awesome.
One of those little girls Coulddo that shit.
That's crazy.
I saw that video.
That's sick, but yeah.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
So what is next On
our?
Speaker 2 (44:19):
list.
Oh yeah, so we got a couplemore.
Oh, we're running out of timealready I know.
So I was like hey, we bettercheck that shit we got on the ai
subject and what is next on?
Our list of cups.
Speaker 1 (44:31):
Let's go, let's go,
let's go so I think we got the
skit.
Speaker 2 (44:40):
Uh, or we can do
another song whatever you want,
let's do skit, uh, okay, so thisis, this is one of the first.
It's like the second tim skit.
Okay, so this is one of thefirst.
It's like the second Tim skitwe ever did.
Speaker 1 (44:52):
It is.
I think the first one wasMcDonald's.
Oh shit, I don't want to dothat.
The first one was McDonald's.
Speaker 2 (44:58):
This one was I almost
like this one the best I do too
, jerry, you're so funny dude.
Introducing Jerry by the way nothis was the first episode with
Jerry in it.
Yeah, the sound effects were onpoint too, by the way.
Speaker 1 (45:14):
Drinkin' my pop
Drinkin' my pop With your
Coca-Cola Pop Pop drinkin' pop.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
Alright, what movie
you wanna see, babe?
Speaker 3 (45:28):
Oh what about this
one, rachel McAdams is in it.
Speaker 2 (45:31):
Oh, I love Rachel
McAdams.
What a fag.
Yeah, that one too.
Okay, great, great, you got togo to the bathroom.
Okay, you go and go to thebathroom and I'm going to go
talk to the gentleman at the boxoffice Okay, we'll get some
popcorn and some other stuff.
Juju Beans, baby Okay.
Other stuff, Jujubeens, babyOkay.
Thanks for taking me out for mybirthday, babe.
I love you so much.
Speaker 1 (45:51):
Okay, freeloaded
asshole.
Speaker 2 (45:52):
Let me talk, get some
tickets here.
Speaker 1 (45:53):
You're a fucking
pussy.
Hey, buddy.
Hey where you at back therewhat hey excuse me.
Speaker 2 (46:04):
That knock was
hilarious.
It sounded like a window.
Speaker 3 (46:06):
Dude, it sounded for
real.
Speaker 1 (46:11):
My name is Timmy
T-R-M-M-Y.
Wait a minute, okay, wait okay.
Speaker 2 (46:18):
I want to get two
tickets.
Two tickets, please, how manytickets?
Wait a minute?
Oh, no, dude, I know you.
Why do you torment me?
Okay, you know what you know me, I know you, timmy.
Well, you, dude, I know you.
Why do you torment me?
Okay, you know what you know me, I know you, tim.
Speaker 1 (46:33):
Well, you know me now
Listen, this is what we're
going to do.
Speaker 2 (46:39):
My name's Dr Oom.
Sometimes I laugh.
Why do you continue to haunt mylife Calm?
Speaker 1 (46:45):
down, I can never.
Speaker 2 (46:45):
No, I'm calm today
Because you know what I can
never.
No, I'm calm today Because youknow what we're going to play a
game.
We're going to play a game.
Speaker 1 (46:50):
I love games.
Speaker 2 (46:51):
Timmy, I know I can
see that we're going to play a
game.
I'm not going to get angry.
I'm not going to get upset Lies.
Speaker 3 (46:58):
Lies.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
Two tickets for this
Rachel McAdams movie.
Speaker 1 (47:06):
For me and my girl.
There's a Mc.
You need Homeware tickets Forthe Waitress McMadams Minto
movie.
Did you say Waitress McDonalds?
Speaker 2 (47:17):
No, not McDonalds.
No, we're not talking aboutMcDonalds.
No, we're not talking aboutMcDonalds.
I remember that.
Speaker 1 (47:26):
I love McDonalds.
Speaker 3 (47:28):
Okay, stop how did I
keep a straight face.
You calm down buddy.
Speaker 2 (47:35):
Okay, okay, I'm not
gonna get mad okay, you calm
down, buddy see how many fingersI have.
Can you count?
Speaker 1 (47:40):
you have 10, I think
I have 10, I have one.
Speaker 2 (47:44):
No, don't count your
fingers, please stop.
We stop counting your fingers.
Speaker 1 (47:49):
Two thumbs.
Speaker 2 (47:54):
Good job.
Speaker 3 (47:55):
Very proud of you.
Speaker 2 (47:56):
Timmy T-I-M Tim.
Speaker 1 (48:00):
See how many fingers.
Speaker 2 (48:01):
See how many fingers
I have.
Speaker 1 (48:04):
You have ten.
Speaker 2 (48:05):
I had all my hand
right now pointing towards you.
Speaker 1 (48:08):
You have ten.
Speaker 2 (48:09):
No, it's two.
You are a liar.
You are a liar and I have thismiddle finger here are you
flipping me off?
Nope, because I got the indexfinger I will tell on you two
tickets to this rachel mcadamsmovie.
That's what I want, please oh,no mcdonald's movie.
Speaker 1 (48:25):
No, not mcdonald's
movie.
There's no mcdonald's.
I want to watch a.
Speaker 2 (48:28):
McDonald's movie no,
you don't, you don't want to do
that.
Speaker 1 (48:30):
There's no McDonald's
movie there are two.
Speaker 2 (48:32):
Two tickets, please,
two tickets.
To what Two tickets please, heybabe.
Two tickets to what I know whothis is.
This is the guy I was tellingyou about, who was making my
life a living hell, yeah.
I mean well, I am being nice,I'm being really nice to him.
Yeah, okay, Two tickets please.
Speaker 1 (48:52):
Two tickets.
I'm not getting a drink.
No, don't get a drink.
No, stop, stop, no stop.
Speaker 2 (48:58):
Stop getting a drink.
Speaker 1 (49:05):
Print the fucking
tickets please, sir you need to
calm down.
Speaker 2 (49:07):
Dude, you need to
calm down.
I hate you, tim, listen Please.
Dude, tim you need to calm down.
Speaker 1 (49:11):
I hate you, Tim Rush
it.
Speaker 2 (49:12):
Please Rush it buddy.
Please Rush it.
Please Rush it buddy.
Put the tickets.
Speaker 1 (49:15):
Put the tickets to
what?
Speaker 2 (49:19):
The movie, the movie
I just want to see.
Speaker 1 (49:23):
The McDonald's movie.
Speaker 2 (49:25):
Please be paid.
No, there's no McDonald's movie.
There isn't a McDonald's.
I don't care, if you want to.
Speaker 1 (49:30):
There's no McDonald's
movie, babe.
He's just kind of stupid.
Speaker 2 (49:34):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (49:35):
Hey Jerry, do you
know where's your McDonald's
movie coming?
Speaker 2 (49:38):
out?
Oh, don't ask Jerry.
Speaker 1 (49:39):
I want to watch a
McDonald's movie.
Speaker 2 (49:43):
He's so stupid.
You don't be stupid.
You don't you call me stupid.
You talk McDonald's movies.
There's no McDonald's.
I told you there was noMcDonald's movie.
You're so stupid.
Oh my Dude.
Let me talk to Jerry.
I want to talk to Jerry now.
Speaker 3 (49:57):
Jerry, you're so
stupid.
Speaker 2 (49:58):
I want to talk to
Jerry Because I don't like him
either.
Stop laughing at me, timmy.
Tim, stop laughing.
Okay, hold on, buddy, go getJerry.
I want to talk to him too.
Speaker 1 (50:14):
Jerry, he wants to
talk to you.
Alright, what can I do for you?
Speaker 2 (50:20):
Oh God, Jerry, I
wasn't prepared for that.
There's no McDonald's movie.
I know there's no McDonald'smovie.
I told him that it's the RachelMcAdams movie I want to see.
That's what we want to see, meand my girlfriend.
Speaker 3 (50:32):
Please.
Speaker 1 (50:33):
Hey, hold on a second
.
Speaker 2 (50:35):
Could you please
print two tickets?
There's a big line kind offorming behind me here, so you
may want to get going on that.
Speaker 1 (50:43):
All right, one second
Calm down.
Oh, I'm.
Who did you tell what to do?
Oh man, hold on, let Don't tellus what to do.
Oh man, hold on, let me pushhim.
Let me push the button.
Yeah, there we go, he's pushingbuttons, everybody.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
We're finally getting
somewhere.
Speaker 1 (50:58):
He's pushing buttons.
Oh, it's a button to turn onthe drinks.
No, not the drinks.
No, no, no.
Speaker 2 (51:04):
Put the drink down.
It's advised to push the drink.
Speaker 1 (51:06):
Put it down now.
Speaker 2 (51:10):
Calm down, buddy.
Shut up, Jerry.
No one's asking you.
Speaker 1 (51:12):
Your problems.
Calm down there, buddy.
Why is?
Speaker 2 (51:14):
everybody getting mad
at me.
He's the one that's thinkingabout a McDonald's movie.
It's not a McDonald's movie.
Speaker 1 (51:19):
He wants to watch a
Ronald McDonald movie Jerry Okay
, yes, Let me look up and see ifwe can find a Ronald McDonald
movie.
Speaker 2 (51:25):
Okay, I want to see
the Ronald McDonald ticket.
Let me see what we got here.
You can pick two tickets forthat.
Speaker 1 (51:28):
Let me see what we
got here, Not out yet.
I don't think.
Speaker 2 (51:32):
It's not out yet.
Speaker 1 (51:32):
No, there's still.
Speaker 2 (51:33):
Did you see the
trailer for it?
Speaker 1 (51:34):
There's still
production.
Speaker 2 (51:35):
There's still a
production, oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (51:37):
To make a movie, oh
yeah.
Speaker 2 (51:45):
Have you seen the
trailer yet?
Do you even know what a?
I?
Speaker 3 (51:49):
know where I live, I
know where you live.
Speaker 2 (51:50):
Timmy.
Speaker 1 (51:51):
Actually I don't.
I got you on that one, I justwish I had two damn tickets.
Speaker 2 (51:54):
He's fighting me.
I'm not threatening you, I'msaying something.
How does he know?
Speaker 1 (52:00):
where I live.
Dude, he's fighting me.
He said I live in a twain.
He wants to eat McDonald'smovie.
Oh my God, mcdonald's doesn'tsell movies.
My life sucks so bad they needto go to McDonald's to get a
McDonald's movie.
Speaker 2 (52:16):
My life is awful
McDonald's McNuggets.
I'll tell you what.
I'll let you decide what movieI see.
How about that?
You print whatever two ticketsyou see fit.
How about that?
I'll let you decide.
Speaker 1 (52:29):
All right, okay, all
right, I'll let you decide,
alright, alright, that soundsgood.
Speaker 2 (52:32):
Okay, good Two for
the winger.
The ringer.
That movie has been out forlike years.
That's not playing right now.
Speaker 1 (52:42):
It's my favorite
movie.
Speaker 2 (52:44):
Well, that's great.
That's your favorite movie, butit's not playing here.
That movie came out likeforever ago.
Speaker 1 (52:50):
Don't let me pay.
Oh fine, Winnie the Pooh.
Speaker 2 (52:53):
Winnie the Pooh.
There's no Winnie the Poohmovie either.
No, just okay.
See the little control panel infront of you Sold out.
Speaker 3 (53:01):
Sold out.
Speaker 2 (53:02):
Oh my God, you're
sold out of a movie that's not
even playing.
That's great.
How about this?
How about you see the littlecontrol panel in front of you
there, guy?
See that, stop, stop, crack itopen more pop, dude, drink the
ones that you already have.
I love drinking.
You haven't drank any of them.
You've cracked open like threeof them and you've not drank any
of them.
That's such a waste they pay mein pop.
They pay you in pop.
(53:22):
I would hope they pay you notat all.
But here we go, just hitsomething and we'll hit it two
times One, two.
Let's see what happens.
Speaker 1 (53:34):
Alright, buddy, we'll
try it.
Speaker 2 (53:37):
You're not trying at
all, not at all.
Speaker 1 (53:39):
There's only one
button I like to touch and it's
under the table.
Speaker 2 (53:43):
What's under?
There's a gotten under thetable.
That's right.
What does that do?
Speaker 1 (53:49):
Gets me old.
The delivery on that one.
Speaker 2 (53:51):
That sure is.
What does that do?
Gets me old.
What?
The delivery on that was great,I don't know.
This guy says he's hard.
I don't know what to do.
Speaker 1 (53:59):
Oh my god, what's
that?
Speaker 2 (54:00):
I don't know what to
do what's that?
Speaker 1 (54:03):
There's no one on
McDonald movie here.
Speaker 2 (54:08):
Go to McDonald's to
get a one on McDonald'sdonald's.
Just print me a fucking ticket.
Speaker 1 (54:12):
Print it out now
don't be mean, I'm gonna tell
joe you tell?
Him.
He means you don't want to bemean with him.
If you're mean with him, thenhe's, he's, he's, he's gonna cry
.
And if he cries then it getsthe control panel all the way
and then everybody's not gonna.
Speaker 2 (54:33):
You know what.
I've had enough of this.
Um, I'm just gonna go ahead andjust watch something on netflix
.
So, uh, see you later, timmy,and uh, if you ever, uh, if I
ever see you out in public, I'mgonna beat the shit out of you.
So, don't be playing with meyeah, I'm, and, and your boss
over there too, I'm to beat theshit out of him too.
Speaker 3 (54:51):
What did I?
Speaker 2 (54:55):
do?
Where are you going?
What did I?
Speaker 1 (54:57):
do Dave where are you
going?
I'm going to my house.
I said have fun, have a goodday.
Come on this sucks oh, buddyPump it what did I do?
Speaker 2 (55:22):
what did I do?
That was like the best delivery, dude, dude by the two best
parts are.
We're like, yeah, it's like uh,you've seen the trailer for it
beside the one you live in.
How does he know where I?
live he's threatening me.
He knows where I live, dude.
It's so funny.
That got me good, that one gotme.
Uh, got time for some.
Another one here.
Uh, I do like this one a lot,it's.
(55:44):
It's not like dirty or gross,but it just.
It's just funny to me just thefact that back of the day, we
(56:06):
had to like make it like on thenights and weekends and stuff.
So it's kind of nostalgic.
Speaker 1 (56:13):
Spending money.
I like to be cheap.
I want to save my cash, notspend them on my cell phone.
I would rather call you afternine.
Speaker 3 (56:32):
Three nights a
weekend.
Speaker 2 (56:35):
I love the concept
for this.
It's a long day.
Speaker 1 (56:39):
Waiting till nine
o'clock.
It's eight and Fifty-threeminutes past.
I'm waiting Only seven moreminutes.
How much will this boredom last?
Speaker 3 (56:58):
no, I need free, free
calling, oh my god daddy wants
free.
Daddy wants free, free calling.
Speaker 1 (57:18):
Yeah, back in the day
, dude, it was after nine nights
and weekends, I know man.
Unless it was within yournetwork Network yes.
Don't all tell them, verizon.
If you went outside yournetwork in either of those dude,
you're paying.
Speaker 2 (57:31):
That's crazy.
Back then like that.
Speaker 1 (57:34):
And then I will hang
up the phone now before the
beginning of morning charginghours.
Speaker 3 (57:43):
And I want free.
I love that so much, freecalling.
Speaker 2 (57:52):
People are going to
be like which one's live, john,
and which one's old John.
Speaker 3 (57:55):
Yeah, I want free.
Speaker 1 (57:59):
Daddy wants free
calling.
Speaker 2 (58:08):
You always use
10-10-3-2-1.
10-10-3-2-1,.
Is that what I just said yeah,that's funny.
Speaker 1 (58:26):
I want to wait now,
only five more minutes.
I need to wait now To escapeall the charges.
I want to wait now To call youat nine.
If you can't wait, maybetomorrow is fine.
(58:51):
I want free.
Speaker 2 (58:54):
Dude, that's awesome.
That fucking ruled man.
Speaker 1 (58:57):
If anyone's free
calling Tomorrow will be fine, I
just don't want to pay thatextra money, right.
Speaker 2 (59:07):
Am I doing the
background vocals Free calling?
Speaker 1 (59:13):
Free calling.
Speaker 2 (59:15):
See my brain is
replacing with free calling from
the actual background.
You're pissed by calling.
Speaker 1 (59:23):
This is a repressed
way to call Wait a couple more
minutes, bitch.
Speaker 3 (59:26):
Yeah, I want free Ow
Ow.
Free Ow Ow Ow oh oh, freecalling.
Speaker 1 (59:47):
Back in the days with
, like Nokia's and Kyocera's.
Oh yeah, dude, after nine,after nine.
Speaker 3 (59:52):
Back in the days with
like Nokia's and Kyocera's.
Oh yeah dude After nine.
After nine.
Speaker 1 (59:59):
Free calling Nights
and goddamn weekends no one
charged, that'll get pissed.
Free calling no charge, that'llget pissed, you know it's free.
Speaker 2 (01:00:16):
No charges, no
charges.
Speaker 1 (01:00:20):
That was a good one.
That was a good choice, dude,okay one more.
What is it?
Oh no, I'm going to have toplay it.
I don't care.
Speaker 2 (01:00:25):
One more, and I think
that's all we got Play.
Speaker 1 (01:00:28):
Yeah, pump, yes, pump
, pump, pump.
Only because you're Pull thisthing off the back.
I think that's all we got toplay.
Speaker 3 (01:00:32):
Yeah, pump, yes, oh,
pump, pump, pump.
Only because of your soundeffects with the penis pumping?
Speaker 1 (01:00:38):
Yes, it's a cock pump
.
Could be a bike pump too.
Speaker 2 (01:00:41):
I guess it could be,
if you want.
Speaker 1 (01:00:42):
Yeah, that's too
tight, there we go.
Speaker 2 (01:00:52):
I don't know if this
song is good or not, but it
always stuck out to me.
Speaker 1 (01:00:55):
He gets up, literally
.
I don't think he'll ever comedown.
He's really tough, but he's notthe longest around and I know
it makes it really hard to feel.
But if I get a couple of inchesI'll make a bitch squeal and
(01:01:26):
can't you see I'm standing there, and then he's all grown in his
blood.
I want to put him in mud.
I don't want to come in and die.
Well, flap, yeah, a little flap.
Yeah, someone give me my pumpPump.
Come on, use my pump.
(01:01:47):
Come on and pump Pump, I use mypump.
Come on and pump Pump.
I need my pump.
Hey yo, hey, you Close thatdoor.
What are you looking at, man?
I'm just a normal guy trying tosit in here and use my hand.
(01:02:14):
So can't you see me sittinghere on the shitter trying to
drop out a turd?
I don't care what you heard.
Pumping your dick ain't absurd.
Hey, give me my pump Pump.
Go ahead and pump.
(01:02:36):
I need to pump, pump, need tomake sure I pump yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:02:48):
Not mine, baby.
I'll say did I drop an AustinPowers joke here?
I think Sound effects areawesome.
Speaker 1 (01:03:04):
Poor little dick, no
pain, no gain Come on hell in
the head you look like you'refucking crying in the background
dude.
Speaker 3 (01:03:16):
Here we go.
Speaker 1 (01:03:19):
He's up to four
inches now Come on purple
soldier, Come on helmet head.
Speaker 2 (01:03:25):
There it is Okay.
I wonder if we made this jump.
Speaker 3 (01:03:29):
Let's win a little.
Dude, that sounded Okay.
I wonder if we made this joke.
Let's win a little.
The sound effect is killing me.
Speaker 1 (01:03:42):
Sounds like a fucking
blood pressure cup.
It does a little bit Might aswell.
Pump Pump I think I need topump.
Split saw and pump Pump I thinkI need to pump.
Speaker 3 (01:04:01):
Pump.
Speaker 1 (01:04:05):
Pump Need to fucking
pump.
Pump Need to fucking pump Pumpoh man those old ones are so
(01:04:45):
good they dude, I uh like a lotof these.
We didn't remember whether weuh, whether the they were good
or not, we just kind of playedthem.
The Fraggle Rock one I knew was.
I remember that one dude.
Speaker 2 (01:04:56):
I just kind of saw
ones that stuck out to me.
I don't remember if they weregood or not, but I remember them
being memorable in some wayshape or form.
So I was like that's kind ofwhat I went off of.
Speaker 1 (01:05:07):
Probably one of my
favorites.
I will say I don't know.
I probably one of my favoritesI will say is probably.
Speaker 3 (01:05:15):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:05:15):
I love um what a
wonderful dog.
That one's probably a dog, ohyeah teacher came up to me.
She said what is that?
I said it's a dog.
She said looks more like a catdude.
Speaker 2 (01:05:26):
That got me good.
I laughed so hard at that.
Speaker 1 (01:05:28):
What a great fucking
dude.
Speaker 2 (01:05:30):
Sounds like a cat.
Well, with that being said,that will conclude episode 175.
A trip through memory lane ofepisodes of yesteryear songs and
skits, which is always fun todo.
I get my kicks from 66 Dicks.
Yeah, I get kicks from 66 Dicks.
Dude, that's another one.
Speaker 1 (01:05:55):
Departing words,
words, no, I just want to say
thank you to everybody forlistening um I know, um, that's
it, dude.
Speaker 3 (01:06:02):
I mean, what else do
we gotta say today?
You know, it's like you know um.
Speaker 2 (01:06:05):
Congratulations again
to john on his new position and
job um, I gotta go in at 6 30am every day, so you'll leave
the house at 5 30, pretty muchdamn dude.
Speaker 1 (01:06:14):
Um, I got all um
hoping to get a job.
I'll find out by friday, sohopefully next podcast I'll know
whether I got the new positionor not.
Speaker 2 (01:06:22):
A really good job
that's right, so, uh, so yeah,
we appreciate everyone through.
If you're here since day one,thank you.
If you just joined us, thankyou again, and we hope you stick
around Plenty more where thiscame from.
Stick around for more episodesand more songs and skits and
goofy, stupid shit.
Metal music, because that'slike what we talk about the most
(01:06:45):
, because it's fucking awesome,so and movies and all kinds of
goodies.
Speaker 3 (01:06:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:06:49):
So, with that being
said, we'll see you guys next
week.
I'm John Berkner.
Speaker 1 (01:06:52):
And I'm Jason
Scherger.
Bye-bye Later, guys.