What if you could truly live your best life by simply aligning your actions with your core values and long-term aspirations? Join us on this eye-opening episode of the Human Experience Podcast, where we unpack the transformative power of understanding what matters most to you—whether it's family, creativity, compassion, courage, or authenticity. Through reflecting on moments of joy and frustration, we emphasize the importance of making decisions that resonate with your values and support your personal growth. This conversation guides you in trusting the timing of your life and positioning yourself strategically to achieve both personal and professional success without compromising your authenticity.
Struggling with decision paralysis or waiting for the perfect moment to take action? This episode sheds light on the liberating concept of embracing imperfection and the importance of taking bold steps toward your goals. Discover how to set clear objectives, practice self-promotion, and maintain visibility to align with your aspirations. We explore the impactful nature of sharing your story and the value of even small-scale influence. Gain insights on adjusting your expectations and recognizing the meaningful impact you can have, no matter the size of your audience. This conversation is a call to action—encouraging you to understand your values, stay true to yourself, and fearlessly pursue the life you deserve.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to.
It's the Human ExperiencePodcast Hosted by Hazel Brown, a
healthcare leader, wife, momand career coach.
If you're big on authenticity,personal development,
perseverance and transparency,you're in the right place.
Get ready to be uplifted,inspired and empowered as you
(00:23):
become fearless in pursuit ofthe life you desire and deserve.
Our goal is to help you levelup by creating a safe space to
learn and reflect, whilelistening to transparent stories
from our host or successfulprofessionals and business
owners who've agreed to sharethe parts of success that
typically gets X'd out on socialmedia, because that's the part
(00:46):
you need to see and hear theprocess.
Go ahead and subscribe.
You don't want to miss out onthese transparent stories and
discussions that reveal highs,lows, aha moments and nuggets
that'll help you to grow andglow.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Hey, hey, hey.
You are now tuned in to theit's the Human Experience
podcast.
I'm your host, hazel Brown.
Today I am going to be talkingto you guys about living your
best life.
We're not going back and forthwith nobody, right?
I wanted to talk about thatbecause I feel, like so many
(01:34):
times, there's a science,there's an art, there is a
strategic way of aligning things, trusting the timing of things
and positioning yourself tolevel up and live your best life
, personally, professionally andall the things.
If you're new here, welcome tothe podcast.
(01:56):
If you're a return listener,hey, hey.
Thanks for tuning into thepodcast.
Regardless of which, I want youto scroll up to the top and make
sure you're following thepodcast.
Regardless of which, I want youto scroll up to the top and
make sure you're following thepodcast so that you don't miss
out on all these amazingepisodes.
It's really trying to pour intoyou add value so that we can
grow together.
If you haven't yet rated thepodcast, go ahead and scroll to
(02:17):
the bottom of the list ofepisodes.
If you're listening from Appleand go ahead and rate us five
stars.
Leave a comment so I can knowyour greatest takeaway, what
episodes really fill your cupand has helped you grow into
your highest self.
I want to hear about it.
That way I can know whatepisodes I need to bring you,
(02:39):
what I need to talk more about.
Let me know what you want us totalk about.
Right Us as though it's morethan one of me.
But I like to make talk aboutright Us as though it's more
than one of me, but I like tomake sure that I bring on guests
as well.
That's going to pour some gems,drink the tea, spill the tea if
you will, and all the things.
But I want to go ahead and jumpstraight into the episode.
When I think about living mybest life as you think about
(03:03):
living your best life, I want usto together think about things
that we need to do, and when Ireally was trying to just think
back and reflect about some ofthe most important things, that
helps us get to the next levelso that we can live our best
life is and I did air quotes isunderstanding the importance of
(03:29):
aligning ourselves, positioningourselves and trusting the
timing of our lives.
For me to go into the thick ofthings, I wanna define things.
Y'all know I like definingthings, so alignment means
ensuring that your actions areconsistent with your values and
your long-term goals.
Things Y'all know I likedefining things.
So alignment means ensuringthat your actions are consistent
with your values and yourlong-term goals, and, typically,
(03:51):
with your values, yourlong-term goals.
Like you want to make sure thatyou know what your values are.
You want to know, becausethat's what's going to help you
to know what action to takeright, and you got to gain that
clarity so that you can worktowards your long-term goals.
When we think about values,we'll kind of speak to that as
(04:14):
well, just to make sure we'reall on the same page.
Potentially could havepersonally and it typically
trickles over professionally aswell are things like family,
(04:36):
creativity, compassion, courage,courage is definitely a value
system of mind.
Freedom, balance, duality,respect duality and respect
recipro reciprocity.
All those things are values ofminds, and so it's very
important for you to know whatthose values are.
Some other ones that come upfor me are authenticity.
It is just making sure thatthere's some freedom in me,
(04:58):
being able to be independentlyme.
I don't have to put on a facade, I don't have to put on a show.
I don't have to put on a facade.
I don't have to put on a show.
I don't have to pretend to besomeone that I'm not, and so
that authenticity piece shinesthrough.
I also don't like rigid lines.
I like to be creative and bemyself.
Self-expression is veryimportant to me, and so I share
(05:20):
that.
To say that these values somealign for me, some may not.
There might be others that Ihave not shared because there
are so many more right whenthose values don't show up
whether you're seeking a job,whether you're creating a
business, when you're meetingdifferent people in terms of
partnerships and friendships, nomatter what those situations
(05:42):
and experiences are the valuesystem comes into play.
Because when someonedisrespects you, no matter what
scene and area you're in, you'regoing to be triggered.
You're going to realize thatthis does not align to my value
system.
You're triggered because you'vehad past situations before that
you didn't feel so good.
When these things happen and Ireally want to make sure we dive
(06:05):
into that a little bit, becausethat's what's going to help you
determine your value system,right?
You're like hey, so how do Iknow what my values are?
You really have to dig deep andthink about times that made you
smile from ear to ear, timesthat someone really teed you off
and, as a result, you were justso furious, whether they lied
(06:30):
on you, whether you gave iteverything you had and they gave
you nothing, whether it's.
You had all of these highexpectations, but you didn't lay
down the groundwork in terms offoundation expectations of what
you wanted to happen, and sothings did not align well for
you, and you were the one thatpoured but did not receive, and
(06:54):
so that really lends toreciprocity.
But there are so many otherthings that may have happened
throughout your life that youknow you were triggered by and
really didn't feel so good aboutthe experience or other times
in your life where you felt like, yes, this person showed up for
me and this is the kind offriendships I want to have.
(07:15):
This person listened to me,this person didn't judge me,
this person showed respect to me, this person believed in me,
this person saw things in methat I didn't see in myself, and
they were willing to share it.
They didn't gatekeep, they hadresources for things and easily
gave it to me, and those arethings that are important for
(07:38):
you to understand when you'retrying to make decisions about
your values.
I'm going to share something alittle bit personal that I
really didn't even expect toshare.
Sometimes I have concerns withhow I approach friendship,
because for me, reciprocity iskey.
Someone being genuine andhaving an open heart is key and
(08:02):
I feel like sometimes, when I gointo situations, especially
with me doing events, doing thepodcast, doing career coaching,
having a nine to five runningthis business and, you know,
dealing with differentinteractions, just being a mom,
a wife and all the things goingto networking events I meet a
lot of people.
So, meeting a lot of people,for me it's always interesting.
(08:26):
When I meet certain people andthey are just willing to pour,
it's like a light up.
It's like, oh my God, they arenot gatekeeping.
They're like, hey, have youthought about doing this?
Like you should reach out tothis person.
Here's their information.
Oh, have you thought aboutwhere so many people are trying
(08:51):
to hold back information, holdthings to themselves, when
there's such an abundance ofopportunity out here?
So when I come across people,they're like, hey, hazel, I told
such and such about you.
Or hey, hazel, I shared yourpodcast.
Or hey, hazel, I told thisperson about your event.
Or I referred this person, orwhatever the case may be.
(09:14):
It's always like, ooh, they'renot a gatekeeper.
Because for me, when I meetpeople, whether they're in the
same industry as me or they'renot, whatever I can do to
inspire them or into them, helpthem become a better person, I'm
going to do.
There are things that I'm justgoing to share with you and no
(09:35):
expectation of anything inreturn, because I want to see
you win and when I see peoplecome across that way, it just
lights me up and that's how Iknow my value system has
reciprocacy in it.
It's just so important for meto feel like the person on the
other end is going to pour backinto me.
(09:57):
And you can see that and feelthat when you meet someone,
because they are just pouringwithout even realizing they're
pouring because that's just whatthey do and it makes it easier
for you to pour into them, forme, like my guard goes down and
I could pour into them so freelybecause I realized that they
(10:17):
are not gatekeeping and I feellike in life you have to get to
a point.
My mom used to say, like it'scool to be nice, but I'm not a
fool, and I've had to realizethat within my adulthood.
That is very important for meto be sensitive to the fact that
sometimes we can be too nice,and so we have to really better
(10:39):
understand what our values arefor us to move forward in making
decisions and how we move inour day-to-day life.
Listen, I really went leftfield, but I think it was super
important to kind of talkthrough that so you better
understand it.
But when we think aboutaligning timing and positioning,
my favorite quote is it alwaysseems impossible until it's done
(11:02):
, and that's by Nelson Mandela.
I might have mentioned it atsome point in the podcast
because I love that saying, butthat really is key.
When you think about aligningtiming and positioning and when
you go deeper in terms ofunderstanding timing, you want
to make sure that you know whento act and when to wait, meaning
(11:23):
some things require patienceand recognition of opportunities
, whether they're trueopportunities or not.
I know we talked about thatabout two episodes ago.
We talked a little bit aboutthe importance of recognizing
that you don't always have toact on an opportunity, and
that's really where the timingpiece comes in.
It's really assessing yourenvironment, your readiness,
(11:46):
trusting your instincts.
I want to make sure that youtake the time to really own
those gut feelings and I knowsometimes people talk about like
gut feelings and you're likewhat gut feelings are these
people talking about?
Let's talk about them.
Like, sometimes you're gettinglike headaches, like your
stomach could feel like queasyand weird, not in a butterfly
(12:08):
feeling kind of way, but in likea ooh.
Every time I'm around thisperson, every time I think about
this situation, every time Itry to make this decision, this
shows up for me.
I start to feel this way.
I start to feel anxious.
Maybe I start to break out withacne.
Maybe I start to catch a hotflash Listen, I'm always
(12:29):
catching a hot flash, so we'regoing to throw that out there.
But that's menopause.
That is not energy feelings,right, but I wanted to make sure
that you take some time totruly understand and embrace
those things, because that'sreally going to help you
understand what directions youneed to take or not take, based
(12:51):
on a timing perspective.
And then I also want you tounderstand why you're triggered
by something that may havehappened in your past.
And the reason that comes upand I want to share
transparently is for me.
Recently I've been trying tosit through the thought process
of making a change in myenvironment and I had to realize
(13:14):
that sometimes myapprehensiveness around making
this move or change is becauseI've experienced situations
before where we've moved closerto family and this picture that
I had in my mind and the waythat family was going to be over
like the television shows, ifyou will it didn't happen.
(13:37):
Right, that togetherness that Iexpected and these great
experiences were not whatactually took place.
So you get older, you get wiser,you start to realize like your
decisions cannot be based on thehighest level of expectations
and how you would like forthings to look in your ideal
(13:58):
world, because in your day today life and in the world that
you create for yourself, youhave control over how you show
up for your goals.
You have control over how youshow up for your immediate
family and the way that yourhome operates, or how you show
up for your immediate family andthe way that your home operates
, but you don't have controlaround how other people move and
how they operate.
(14:19):
You don't have control aroundthe environment, specifically in
terms of like neighbors and allthe things around you, and the
way that your coworkers aregonna act, the way that your
business partner is gonna act orwhat they're gonna go through.
And so that's why, like, yourvalue system comes into play
with, separate from your valuesystem, is really analyzing,
like what things are showing upfor you.
(14:40):
That's causing you to think ina way that you're thinking
whether you're apprehensive,whether you're anxious, whether
you're nervous, whether you'refearful, whatever the case may
be separate from analyzing yourthoughts, your goals, your gut
feeling and intuition and, ofcourse, bringing it to God.
Right, we're going to have somefaith.
We're going to talk to Godabout it too.
(15:01):
We're going to make sure weunderstand what feels right for
us and what comes up.
But I also would be remiss if Ididn't talk about how important
it is to make sure that youreflect on different things that
have happened in your life,because life really happens in
(15:21):
waves and trends and so oftenthe experiences that you're
experiencing is on maybe a 2.0,but it's probably happened to
you at some point before.
When you had to make thesedecisions, you felt this kind of
way.
What came up from thatexperience?
Why are you reacting the wayyou're acting now to the new
decision?
Is this from something else inyour past, or do you truly have
valid concerns?
Whatever that looks like, Iwant you to make sure you're
(15:43):
looking into that and thinkingthrough that.
Overcoming decision paralysis,right, because when you think
about time, you're like well, isit the right time?
Are we sure it's the right time?
Should we wait a little bit?
Should we have done this lastyear?
Should we have done it lastmonth, like.
There are all theseoverthinking themes that come
(16:05):
into play when we're trying tocreate a process around timing,
and so I just want you to makesure, like you're setting clear
goals for yourself, youembracing imperfection.
We are not perfect.
It is not the perfect time forthe career, the business, the
kids, the move, the nothing.
It is never the perfect time.
So if we are waiting for theperfect time, we're probably
(16:27):
going to be waiting for a longtime.
I don't know about you, buttime is the one thing that is
super precious for me, and so wewant to make sure we're not
sitting around hereprocrastinating in decision
paralysis so we're not makingany decisions.
I want us to keep going afterour goals.
The last piece of all of thisaligning and timing is clearly
(16:51):
positioning.
You want to make sure thatyou're present with yourself.
You're creating thatcredibility for yourself, that
relevance, and making strategicdecisions in terms of like, how
you move forward.
The reason why like that cameup for me and I wanted to make
sure I share that with you issometimes you're like you're not
(17:15):
sure what you're even workingtowards, and if you're not sure
what you're working towards,you're not going to be able to
position yourself for that nextthing that's going to help you
live your best life.
So I really want you to go andthink about what your ideal life
looks like.
Where are you, what are youdoing?
And, in order for you to createthat, what do you need to do to
(17:36):
make it happen?
That is where the visibilitycomes to play.
You need to make sure thatyou're going to the right events
, you're meeting the rightpeople, you're creating the
right kind of content.
If you're into social media,you're making sure that you're
sharing your story and owningyour short story.
We live in a day to where youcan't.
You know.
We think about sayings likeclosed mouths don't get fed.
(17:58):
It doesn't.
And something that I had totell my daughter in the past and
tell myself is you know howawesome you are, you know your
greatness, you know yourself-worth, but if closed mouths
don't get fed and your mouth isalways closed, I can't know how
awesome you are because I don'tget to hear it, I don't get to
see it, I don't get toexperience it.
(18:20):
I think maybe the energy feelsright, but I don't know anything
about you.
I don't know what you have tooffer.
So sometimes we have to get outof our way and make sure we're
taking the actions and stepsnecessary so people could know
how awesome we are.
And even if people don'trecognize how awesome you are
right away, keep going.
(18:41):
Keep showing your greatness,because the right people will
see it.
Everyone is not here for you,but the people who are here for
you will be happy that you haveshown up and taken your position
of owning your greatness.
And I would not be right if Ididn't share that piece too,
because just because you'redoing what feels right to you to
(19:03):
live your best life, justbecause you're going after your
goals, it doesn't mean a herd ofcows, sheep, people, whoever is
going to come running, knockingdown at your door.
It's just not going to happenthat way.
It is going to be a build up oftimes that you've put in the
work, times that you've showedup, and you did not give up.
(19:25):
You had that resilience andcourage.
Let's go back to courage.
We had the courage to keepgoing and understanding that
even if you only touch the lifeof one person, and if that
person is you, that still counts, you're doing a great job.
We really have to shift ourmindset in the way that we look
(19:46):
at things.
Like we live in a world ofsocial media now where it feels
like you need to have 100Kfollowers to be making an impact
.
Like no, if you have one personthat you're making a difference
in their lives, you are makingan impact.
I personally have had to makethat mindset shift, not from a
(20:06):
social media perspective, buteven from this podcast.
My initial goal was that mypodcast was going to get 10,000
downloads every episode, andwhen it didn't work out like
that because it did not work outlike that, my podcast does well
, but it's not getting 10,000downloads Listen, $10,000,.
(20:27):
Let's go, give me $10,000 anepisode, I'll take that too.
But the point is is like thatis not what was happening, and
so my expectation was high interms of 10,000 downloads per
episode, but I did not get that.
But I got a great return interms of the number of downloads
and also the feedback that Iget from people sharing about
(20:50):
the impact that the podcast ismaking on their lives, and that
had to help me realize mysweetheart.
It is not about 10,000 downloads.
It is about the people and thelives that you're impacting.
That is what is important, andthat is when you know you're
living in.
Your purpose is that you're ableto help other people become the
version of themselves that theydesperately want to be.
(21:11):
That is what I'm here for, andI know you are filled with
greatness and you have so muchgoodness in your heart that you
wanna get out.
I just want you to go ahead andget it out and understand that
in order to figure out how toget out.
I just want you to go ahead andget it out and understand that,
in order to figure out how toget to the next level and align
yourself with the timing andpositioning that you need to
(21:32):
make to get to the next level,you got to figure out what your
values are.
You got to make sure thatyou're being authentic to
yourself.
That way, you can show up foryourself and take the action
that you need to be able tooperationalize, materialize
those goals so that you can growinto your best self, live your
(21:52):
best life, because you are sodeserving of it.
Now go get it and make ithappen for you.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
We hope you caught all those gems.
So here for all of it.
Be sure to subscribe so thatyou don't miss a gem.
Write a review so that we knowto keep bringing you episodes
like this.
And check us out online atitsthehumanexperiencecom to keep
up with us.
Keep growing and glowing.
Catch you on the next episode.
Welcome to.
It's the Human ExperiencePodcast Hosted by Hazel Brown, a
healthcare leader, wife, momand career coach.
If you're big on authenticity,personal development,
perseverance and transparency,you're in the right place.
Get ready to be uplifted,inspired and empowered as you
(00:23):
become fearless in pursuit ofthe life you desire and deserve.
Our goal is to help you levelup by creating a safe space to
learn and reflect, whilelistening to transparent stories
from our host or successfulprofessionals and business
owners who've agreed to sharethe parts of success that
typically gets X'd out on socialmedia, because that's the part
(00:46):
you need to see and hear theprocess.
Go ahead and subscribe.
You don't want to miss out onthese transparent stories and
discussions that reveal highs,lows, aha moments and nuggets
that'll help you to grow andglow.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Hey, hey, hey.
You are now tuned in to theit's the Human Experience
podcast.
I'm your host, hazel Brown.
Today I am going to be talkingto you guys about living your
best life.
We're not going back and forthwith nobody, right?
I wanted to talk about thatbecause I feel, like so many
(01:34):
times, there's a science,there's an art, there is a
strategic way of aligning things, trusting the timing of things
and positioning yourself tolevel up and live your best life
, personally, professionally andall the things.
If you're new here, welcome tothe podcast.
(01:56):
If you're a return listener,hey, hey.
Thanks for tuning into thepodcast.
Regardless of which, I want youto scroll up to the top and make
sure you're following thepodcast.
Regardless of which, I want youto scroll up to the top and
make sure you're following thepodcast so that you don't miss
out on all these amazingepisodes.
It's really trying to pour intoyou add value so that we can
grow together.
If you haven't yet rated thepodcast, go ahead and scroll to
(02:17):
the bottom of the list ofepisodes.
If you're listening from Appleand go ahead and rate us five
stars.
Leave a comment so I can knowyour greatest takeaway, what
episodes really fill your cupand has helped you grow into
your highest self.
I want to hear about it.
That way I can know whatepisodes I need to bring you,
(02:39):
what I need to talk more about.
Let me know what you want us totalk about.
Right Us as though it's morethan one of me.
But I like to make talk aboutright Us as though it's more
than one of me, but I like tomake sure that I bring on guests
as well.
That's going to pour some gems,drink the tea, spill the tea if
you will, and all the things.
But I want to go ahead and jumpstraight into the episode.
When I think about living mybest life as you think about
(03:03):
living your best life, I want usto together think about things
that we need to do, and when Ireally was trying to just think
back and reflect about some ofthe most important things, that
helps us get to the next levelso that we can live our best
life is and I did air quotes isunderstanding the importance of
(03:29):
aligning ourselves, positioningourselves and trusting the
timing of our lives.
For me to go into the thick ofthings, I wanna define things.
Y'all know I like definingthings, so alignment means
ensuring that your actions areconsistent with your values and
your long-term goals.
Things Y'all know I likedefining things.
So alignment means ensuringthat your actions are consistent
with your values and yourlong-term goals, and, typically,
(03:51):
with your values, yourlong-term goals.
Like you want to make sure thatyou know what your values are.
You want to know, becausethat's what's going to help you
to know what action to takeright, and you got to gain that
clarity so that you can worktowards your long-term goals.
When we think about values,we'll kind of speak to that as
(04:14):
well, just to make sure we'reall on the same page.
Potentially could havepersonally and it typically
trickles over professionally aswell are things like family,
(04:36):
creativity, compassion, courage,courage is definitely a value
system of mind.
Freedom, balance, duality,respect duality and respect
recipro reciprocity.
All those things are values ofminds, and so it's very
important for you to know whatthose values are.
Some other ones that come upfor me are authenticity.
It is just making sure thatthere's some freedom in me,
(04:58):
being able to be independentlyme.
I don't have to put on a facade, I don't have to put on a show.
I don't have to put on a facade.
I don't have to put on a show.
I don't have to pretend to besomeone that I'm not, and so
that authenticity piece shinesthrough.
I also don't like rigid lines.
I like to be creative and bemyself.
Self-expression is veryimportant to me, and so I share
(05:20):
that.
To say that these values somealign for me, some may not.
There might be others that Ihave not shared because there
are so many more right whenthose values don't show up
whether you're seeking a job,whether you're creating a
business, when you're meetingdifferent people in terms of
partnerships and friendships, nomatter what those situations
(05:42):
and experiences are the valuesystem comes into play.
Because when someonedisrespects you, no matter what
scene and area you're in, you'regoing to be triggered.
You're going to realize thatthis does not align to my value
system.
You're triggered because you'vehad past situations before that
you didn't feel so good.
When these things happen and Ireally want to make sure we dive
(06:05):
into that a little bit, becausethat's what's going to help you
determine your value system,right?
You're like hey, so how do Iknow what my values are?
You really have to dig deep andthink about times that made you
smile from ear to ear, timesthat someone really teed you off
and, as a result, you were justso furious, whether they lied
(06:30):
on you, whether you gave iteverything you had and they gave
you nothing, whether it's.
You had all of these highexpectations, but you didn't lay
down the groundwork in terms offoundation expectations of what
you wanted to happen, and sothings did not align well for
you, and you were the one thatpoured but did not receive, and
(06:54):
so that really lends toreciprocity.
But there are so many otherthings that may have happened
throughout your life that youknow you were triggered by and
really didn't feel so good aboutthe experience or other times
in your life where you felt like, yes, this person showed up for
me and this is the kind offriendships I want to have.
(07:15):
This person listened to me,this person didn't judge me,
this person showed respect to me, this person believed in me,
this person saw things in methat I didn't see in myself, and
they were willing to share it.
They didn't gatekeep, they hadresources for things and easily
gave it to me, and those arethings that are important for
(07:38):
you to understand when you'retrying to make decisions about
your values.
I'm going to share something alittle bit personal that I
really didn't even expect toshare.
Sometimes I have concerns withhow I approach friendship,
because for me, reciprocity iskey.
Someone being genuine andhaving an open heart is key and
(08:02):
I feel like sometimes, when I gointo situations, especially
with me doing events, doing thepodcast, doing career coaching,
having a nine to five runningthis business and, you know,
dealing with differentinteractions, just being a mom,
a wife and all the things goingto networking events I meet a
lot of people.
So, meeting a lot of people,for me it's always interesting.
(08:26):
When I meet certain people andthey are just willing to pour,
it's like a light up.
It's like, oh my God, they arenot gatekeeping.
They're like, hey, have youthought about doing this?
Like you should reach out tothis person.
Here's their information.
Oh, have you thought aboutwhere so many people are trying
(08:51):
to hold back information, holdthings to themselves, when
there's such an abundance ofopportunity out here?
So when I come across people,they're like, hey, hazel, I told
such and such about you.
Or hey, hazel, I shared yourpodcast.
Or hey, hazel, I told thisperson about your event.
Or I referred this person, orwhatever the case may be.
(09:14):
It's always like, ooh, they'renot a gatekeeper.
Because for me, when I meetpeople, whether they're in the
same industry as me or they'renot, whatever I can do to
inspire them or into them, helpthem become a better person, I'm
going to do.
There are things that I'm justgoing to share with you and no
(09:35):
expectation of anything inreturn, because I want to see
you win and when I see peoplecome across that way, it just
lights me up and that's how Iknow my value system has
reciprocacy in it.
It's just so important for meto feel like the person on the
other end is going to pour backinto me.
(09:57):
And you can see that and feelthat when you meet someone,
because they are just pouringwithout even realizing they're
pouring because that's just whatthey do and it makes it easier
for you to pour into them, forme, like my guard goes down and
I could pour into them so freelybecause I realized that they
(10:17):
are not gatekeeping and I feellike in life you have to get to
a point.
My mom used to say, like it'scool to be nice, but I'm not a
fool, and I've had to realizethat within my adulthood.
That is very important for meto be sensitive to the fact that
sometimes we can be too nice,and so we have to really better
(10:39):
understand what our values arefor us to move forward in making
decisions and how we move inour day-to-day life.
Listen, I really went leftfield, but I think it was super
important to kind of talkthrough that so you better
understand it.
But when we think aboutaligning timing and positioning,
my favorite quote is it alwaysseems impossible until it's done
(11:02):
, and that's by Nelson Mandela.
I might have mentioned it atsome point in the podcast
because I love that saying, butthat really is key.
When you think about aligningtiming and positioning and when
you go deeper in terms ofunderstanding timing, you want
to make sure that you know whento act and when to wait, meaning
(11:23):
some things require patienceand recognition of opportunities
, whether they're trueopportunities or not.
I know we talked about thatabout two episodes ago.
We talked a little bit aboutthe importance of recognizing
that you don't always have toact on an opportunity, and
that's really where the timingpiece comes in.
It's really assessing yourenvironment, your readiness,
(11:46):
trusting your instincts.
I want to make sure that youtake the time to really own
those gut feelings and I knowsometimes people talk about like
gut feelings and you're likewhat gut feelings are these
people talking about?
Let's talk about them.
Like, sometimes you're gettinglike headaches, like your
stomach could feel like queasyand weird, not in a butterfly
(12:08):
feeling kind of way, but in likea ooh.
Every time I'm around thisperson, every time I think about
this situation, every time Itry to make this decision, this
shows up for me.
I start to feel this way.
I start to feel anxious.
Maybe I start to break out withacne.
Maybe I start to catch a hotflash Listen, I'm always
(12:29):
catching a hot flash, so we'regoing to throw that out there.
But that's menopause.
That is not energy feelings,right, but I wanted to make sure
that you take some time totruly understand and embrace
those things, because that'sreally going to help you
understand what directions youneed to take or not take, based
(12:51):
on a timing perspective.
And then I also want you tounderstand why you're triggered
by something that may havehappened in your past.
And the reason that comes upand I want to share
transparently is for me.
Recently I've been trying tosit through the thought process
of making a change in myenvironment and I had to realize
(13:14):
that sometimes myapprehensiveness around making
this move or change is becauseI've experienced situations
before where we've moved closerto family and this picture that
I had in my mind and the waythat family was going to be over
like the television shows, ifyou will it didn't happen.
(13:37):
Right, that togetherness that Iexpected and these great
experiences were not whatactually took place.
So you get older, you get wiser,you start to realize like your
decisions cannot be based on thehighest level of expectations
and how you would like forthings to look in your ideal
(13:58):
world, because in your day today life and in the world that
you create for yourself, youhave control over how you show
up for your goals.
You have control over how youshow up for your immediate
family and the way that yourhome operates, or how you show
up for your immediate family andthe way that your home operates
, but you don't have controlaround how other people move and
how they operate.
(14:19):
You don't have control aroundthe environment, specifically in
terms of like neighbors and allthe things around you, and the
way that your coworkers aregonna act, the way that your
business partner is gonna act orwhat they're gonna go through.
And so that's why, like, yourvalue system comes into play
with, separate from your valuesystem, is really analyzing,
like what things are showing upfor you.
(14:40):
That's causing you to think ina way that you're thinking
whether you're apprehensive,whether you're anxious, whether
you're nervous, whether you'refearful, whatever the case may
be separate from analyzing yourthoughts, your goals, your gut
feeling and intuition and, ofcourse, bringing it to God.
Right, we're going to have somefaith.
We're going to talk to Godabout it too.
(15:01):
We're going to make sure weunderstand what feels right for
us and what comes up.
But I also would be remiss if Ididn't talk about how important
it is to make sure that youreflect on different things that
have happened in your life,because life really happens in
(15:21):
waves and trends and so oftenthe experiences that you're
experiencing is on maybe a 2.0,but it's probably happened to
you at some point before.
When you had to make thesedecisions, you felt this kind of
way.
What came up from thatexperience?
Why are you reacting the wayyou're acting now to the new
decision?
Is this from something else inyour past, or do you truly have
valid concerns?
Whatever that looks like, Iwant you to make sure you're
(15:43):
looking into that and thinkingthrough that.
Overcoming decision paralysis,right, because when you think
about time, you're like well, isit the right time?
Are we sure it's the right time?
Should we wait a little bit?
Should we have done this lastyear?
Should we have done it lastmonth, like.
There are all theseoverthinking themes that come
(16:05):
into play when we're trying tocreate a process around timing,
and so I just want you to makesure, like you're setting clear
goals for yourself, youembracing imperfection.
We are not perfect.
It is not the perfect time forthe career, the business, the
kids, the move, the nothing.
It is never the perfect time.
So if we are waiting for theperfect time, we're probably
(16:27):
going to be waiting for a longtime.
I don't know about you, buttime is the one thing that is
super precious for me, and so wewant to make sure we're not
sitting around hereprocrastinating in decision
paralysis so we're not makingany decisions.
I want us to keep going afterour goals.
The last piece of all of thisaligning and timing is clearly
(16:51):
positioning.
You want to make sure thatyou're present with yourself.
You're creating thatcredibility for yourself, that
relevance, and making strategicdecisions in terms of like, how
you move forward.
The reason why like that cameup for me and I wanted to make
sure I share that with you issometimes you're like you're not
(17:15):
sure what you're even workingtowards, and if you're not sure
what you're working towards,you're not going to be able to
position yourself for that nextthing that's going to help you
live your best life.
So I really want you to go andthink about what your ideal life
looks like.
Where are you, what are youdoing?
And, in order for you to createthat, what do you need to do to
(17:36):
make it happen?
That is where the visibilitycomes to play.
You need to make sure thatyou're going to the right events
, you're meeting the rightpeople, you're creating the
right kind of content.
If you're into social media,you're making sure that you're
sharing your story and owningyour short story.
We live in a day to where youcan't.
You know.
We think about sayings likeclosed mouths don't get fed.
(17:58):
It doesn't.
And something that I had totell my daughter in the past and
tell myself is you know howawesome you are, you know your
greatness, you know yourself-worth, but if closed mouths
don't get fed and your mouth isalways closed, I can't know how
awesome you are because I don'tget to hear it, I don't get to
see it, I don't get toexperience it.
(18:20):
I think maybe the energy feelsright, but I don't know anything
about you.
I don't know what you have tooffer.
So sometimes we have to get outof our way and make sure we're
taking the actions and stepsnecessary so people could know
how awesome we are.
And even if people don'trecognize how awesome you are
right away, keep going.
(18:41):
Keep showing your greatness,because the right people will
see it.
Everyone is not here for you,but the people who are here for
you will be happy that you haveshown up and taken your position
of owning your greatness.
And I would not be right if Ididn't share that piece too,
because just because you'redoing what feels right to you to
(19:03):
live your best life, justbecause you're going after your
goals, it doesn't mean a herd ofcows, sheep, people, whoever is
going to come running, knockingdown at your door.
It's just not going to happenthat way.
It is going to be a build up oftimes that you've put in the
work, times that you've showedup, and you did not give up.
(19:25):
You had that resilience andcourage.
Let's go back to courage.
We had the courage to keepgoing and understanding that
even if you only touch the lifeof one person, and if that
person is you, that still counts, you're doing a great job.
We really have to shift ourmindset in the way that we look
(19:46):
at things.
Like we live in a world ofsocial media now where it feels
like you need to have 100Kfollowers to be making an impact
.
Like no, if you have one personthat you're making a difference
in their lives, you are makingan impact.
I personally have had to makethat mindset shift, not from a
(20:06):
social media perspective, buteven from this podcast.
My initial goal was that mypodcast was going to get 10,000
downloads every episode, andwhen it didn't work out like
that because it did not work outlike that, my podcast does well
, but it's not getting 10,000downloads Listen, $10,000,.
(20:27):
Let's go, give me $10,000 anepisode, I'll take that too.
But the point is is like thatis not what was happening, and
so my expectation was high interms of 10,000 downloads per
episode, but I did not get that.
But I got a great return interms of the number of downloads
and also the feedback that Iget from people sharing about
(20:50):
the impact that the podcast ismaking on their lives, and that
had to help me realize mysweetheart.
It is not about 10,000 downloads.
It is about the people and thelives that you're impacting.
That is what is important, andthat is when you know you're
living in.
Your purpose is that you're ableto help other people become the
version of themselves that theydesperately want to be.
(21:11):
That is what I'm here for, andI know you are filled with
greatness and you have so muchgoodness in your heart that you
wanna get out.
I just want you to go ahead andget it out and understand that
in order to figure out how toget out.
I just want you to go ahead andget it out and understand that,
in order to figure out how toget to the next level and align
yourself with the timing andpositioning that you need to
(21:32):
make to get to the next level,you got to figure out what your
values are.
You got to make sure thatyou're being authentic to
yourself.
That way, you can show up foryourself and take the action
that you need to be able tooperationalize, materialize
those goals so that you can growinto your best self, live your
(21:52):
best life, because you are sodeserving of it.
Now go get it and make ithappen for you.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
We hope you caught all those gems.
So here for all of it.
Be sure to subscribe so thatyou don't miss a gem.
Write a review so that we knowto keep bringing you episodes
like this.
And check us out online atitsthehumanexperiencecom to keep
up with us.
Keep growing and glowing.
Catch you on the next episode.
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