Nothing Had Changed yet Everything Had Changed with Christina Hess - 7 - It's Time to Rise Up

Episode Transcript
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Kim McIntire (00:09):
Welcome to the it's Time to Rise Up podcast.
I'm Kim McIntyre, your host.
Thank you for joining us thisweek and if you're not familiar
with our show, please check outour website at
itstimetoriseuporg.
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and anywhere else you find yourpodcast.

(00:30):
Please leave us a comment, givea thumbs up or, even better,
leave a five-star review onApple Podcasts.
We're going to jump right intoour interview today.
I am so excited, christina,like thank you for your yes.
I just want to start withsaying I appreciate that you
said yes, you're a friend,you're a sister in Christ and I

(00:51):
have seen God do an amazing workin you, and today you're here
to share about your testimonyfrom Conference 2024.
But before we get into that,why don't you just tell our
listeners a little bit aboutyourself?

Christina Hess (01:08):
Okay, well, I'm Christina Hess.
I've been married for 20 yearsto my husband, matt.
We live in Pittsburgh, kansas,and we have four kids.
So Jocelyn is our oldest, she's15.
Peyton 13.
Jillian is 10.

(01:28):
And Paxton is 9.

Wow, so you're a busy mom?
Yes, so what is keeping youbusy other than kids and husband
?
Are you doing some ministrywork?
I know you're doing someministry work through church.
What's that look like?

Yeah, so we go to James River Church over in
Joplin, missouri, so that's a45-minute drive, but it's worth
it.
A church alive is worth thedrive is what we kind of said
whenever we first started going.
We're like, can we do thiscommitment?
But it's been amazing.
And so at church I'm on ourprayer team, the discipleship
team, and also I serve inGrowTrack and on the hosting

(02:08):
team.
Matt and I together serve inyouth twice a month and so that
keeps me busy.
During the day I really enjoydifferent Bible studies.
I'm in a life group, I go to amom's group and my favorite
thing to do to fill my time upduring the day is go to coffee

(02:28):
with women and just talk to themabout the Lord and what the
Lord's doing in their life andwhat he's doing in my life.

Yes, and I'm very fortunate and blessed to be one
of those women.
Yeah, so yay, and I know you dosome mentoring as well.

Yes, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, okay, we're going to talk about that a
little bit later as well.
So when did you receivesalvation, christina?

So I grew up in church, I would say I received
salvation.
I was eight is when, you know,I made that decision for myself.
But I mean, I grew up in church.
I've always been in church, butI was at a VBS at my grandma's
church, so not even the churchthat I went to.
When I remember saying, youknow, I think, hearing a story
about the prodigal son, and likeI don't want to be a lost son

(03:12):
anymore, and so that's when Iaccepted Jesus, like for my
personal savior.

I love that at eight years old, I mean, that's
been a few years ago, yeah, justa few.
I won't say your age, but thefact that you remember the Bible
story and you remember the lostson.
Just that's amazing, because Ihear so many people say I
accepted Jesus when I was little, but they don't really remember
a lot about it, except theyremember the prayer you know

(03:37):
Right.
But yeah, a shout out for VBS.
Yeah, what a great ministry.
Yeah, that's wonderful.
So are there seasons that youlook back on your life that you
just recognize were spiritualmarkers?

Yeah.
So when I think back over justmy walk with the Lord, I mean I
know I remember being baptizedin water.
I remember as a teenagerserving in leadership in my
youth group and being baptizedin the Holy Spirit and that you
know, seeking the Holy Spiritand not receiving it right away,
but continuing to seek andreceiving the Holy Spirit,

(04:12):
that's a game changer.
Just, different timesthroughout my life, feeling
called into the ministry, therewas a time when on a missions
trip I've been on severalmissions trips and where God
just broke my heart for the lostbut then also called me into
children's ministry.
So there was a time, at adifferent church that we were

(04:34):
attending, that I was serving onstaff as the children's pastor.
So those are areas that I canthink back to, but probably, you
know, the most recently hasbeen about three years ago.
So in really the spring of 2021, we just started feeling kind

(04:56):
of a holy discontent about wherewe were at our church.
We had been at our church for17 years.
So we were not people that justfloated from one church to
another.
We had been locked in at thischurch and we were not people
that just floated from onechurch to another.
We had been locked in at thischurch and we were serving in
leadership and we had a lot offriends, but God had something
else in mind and I would havenever gone looking for something

(05:16):
else.
I was very content and lookingback on that season of my life I
, probably without realizing it,kind of thought I had arrived
as far as like my spiritualjourney, like I was doing all
the things, I had my kids and Ihad my husband and I was
following Jesus and I wasserving in ministry, and so it's

(05:37):
kind of like I had arrived.
But the Lord wanted to shakethings up.
He had more for me, and so hestarted the stirring in my heart
for more and where I was justkind of like, why am I not
content here anymore?
Nothing really wrong washappening and so we just kind of
went searching for what God hadfor us and we found James River

(05:58):
and the first Sunday that weattended.
I remember feeling so at home inthis big church, much bigger
than the church we had beenattending.
But I felt more at home therethan I had felt in the church
that I had been in for 17 yearsand that baffled me.
And the church that I wascoming from was Spirit-filled,

(06:21):
but it was like the presence ofthe Lord and the Holy Spirit was
so thick that it just it was sodifferent.
And so it really.
And the way the pastors talkedabout faith and healing and the
Holy Spirit I mean I grew up in,you know, the assemblies of God

(06:43):
, so I grew up hearing about theHoly Spirit.
But the way Pastor John andPastor David and Pastor Brandon
would talk that summer, as welistened, as they talked about
believing God for big things andhealing and what the Bible says
about healing, like that's whenI realized that I thought I had
, like hit this kind of glassceiling in my relationship with

(07:05):
the Lord, and the Holy Spiritblew that ceiling up and I
realized, oh my goodness,there's so much more that I
didn't even realize I wasmissing out on, and so that
really marked my husband and I'slife and we started praying for
things differently andbelieving for things differently
and seeking the Holy Spiritdifferently.
And the way we just we became,we had this boldness that was

(07:30):
different than it had beenbefore.
I remember them sayingsomething about you can be
baptized in the Holy Spirit, youcan be filled with the Holy
Spirit, but if you're not bold,if you're not being bold in your
faith, then it's not.
It's not really like are youreally filled with the Spirit?
If you're not, if you don'thave that boldness when it says
you will receive power, ifyou're not walking in a bold

(07:50):
power, then are you really asfull of the Holy Spirit as he
wants you to be?
And so that was reallychallenging for me.
And so the last three years Ifeel like I have been challenged
and I have grown in myrelationship with the Lord more
than I even thought was possible.
And you know, like we hear allthe time like we can go from

(08:11):
glory to glory to glory.
So I know that even where I'mat now is nowhere near where I
can be Right.

Right, that's so encouraging, so good.
Well, we're here to talk aboutyour testimony from the Rise Up
Conference in 2024.
I was so excited that you went.
Who invited you?
I don't think I ever asked whoinvited you.
Well, really.

I think that award probably, I think that
goes to Chaley Brown, chaley,okay, yeah, you know, I came
into the Rise Up conference thisyear kind of cloaked in
disappointment, and the funnything is that because the year
before so in 2023, I had missedout.
It was something that by thetime, I think, the conference

(08:58):
was happening, I was stillfairly new to James River.
I didn't have a lot ofconnections with women who were
going and it's kind of a word ofmouth invitation type thing,
and so I missed out and Iremembered seeing people going
after the fact and I felt like,oh man, I really missed out.
So the moment Chaley came homefrom Rise Up 2023 and she was
like, oh, why weren't you there?

(09:20):
This was so good.
And I'm like, well, I didn'treally know about it.
She's like mark your calendar.
So I put it on my calendar 365days in advance.
I was not going to miss it.
But as it got closer to theconference coming, I found
myself not really wanting to go.
And I thought, well, this isweird, I've had this on my

(09:41):
calendar for over a year and sowhy am I not feeling excited?
I feel like the timing of it.
You know things were reallybusy at home with school
starting.
I also kind of was.
I felt like I had a little bitof a resentful feeling towards
my husband that weekend and it'sfunny.
It's not like there was a fighthappening or anything major

(10:01):
happening, but you know howsometimes when you live with
somebody and they're just kindof felt like this, this like
fight was like waiting beneaththe surface, just something was
pressing and I was feelingdiscontent in that I wasn't
really in the oh, I'm so pumpedto go hang out with my
girlfriends and have dinner andgo to a conference sort of mood

(10:21):
Like I was just kind of feelinga little glum and I was like
what is this?

And so— Did you identify that as the enemy
trying to discourage you, orwere you just kind of in that
funk of in your mind of justlike, eh, I just don't care?

Yeah, no, I knew I was like the Lord has
something for me and I know thatthis is why the enemy is coming
against me.
So, as much as I kept kind ofgoing like oh I don't know, like
is it too late to cancel or no,I need to just go, or what
about this this weekend?
Or I just, you know, notfeeling like this, like my

(10:58):
friend kept saying, oh, I'm sopumped to go, and I was like I
don't really feel that pumped,like what's wrong with me?
But I can definitely identifyit as like okay, this is the
enemy trying to rob from me whatthe Lord has for me.
And so I just I kind of wasjust putting one foot in front
of the other, knowing that itwould be good, but really not

(11:20):
being excited in my heart, whichkind of surprised me.

So so when did that shift?
Like, did it shift when you'rein the car driving to the
conference, or did it shift whenyou walked in the door?
Or did you have to go throughpart of the weekend in that
state of mind Like how did thatchange, or when did that change?

Yeah, so it definitely didn't change.
In the car, you know, I stillwas like having to like put on
that face like okay, yay, girls,here we go, this is gonna be
awesome.
I mean, I was happy to be withthese friends of mine.
It's not like I was not happyto be there, but I still wasn't,
just like you know, exuberantabout it.
I was still just kind ofputting one foot in front of the

(11:59):
other.
And then, you know, honestly, aswe even walked in the door, you
know, I was met by even moredisappointment, because I made
some decisions just right offthe bat that I kind of wasn't I
wasn't happy about.
And after the fact, like Ihadn't really planned to spend
extra money, and I walked in thedoor and within 10 minutes I

(12:19):
had bought a book and I hadbought a T-shirt and I was kind
of like I wasn't planning onspending that money.
And now I've already spent thisand what am I even doing?
Like I bought this book and Iam not one that reads books very
well or like does Bible studydevotionals very well, like I
start them and then sometimes Ijust don't finish them, and so
I'm like here I have one morebook that I'm probably not going

(12:41):
to finish.
And and did I?
Why did I even get it?
It was, was it out of peerpressure?
You know, I just kind of felteveryone else was doing it, so I
better get it.
And then I got this shirt andyou know, it's like if you
didn't buy the T-shirt, did youreally go?
And so it's like.
So I got the T-shirt and it hadthe word burn across the front,
which I thought was a littlestrange.
But everybody was getting one.

(13:01):
So I bought one anyways, and Ilove your honesty, christina,
you're just totally being honest.
And it's part of the testimony.
Otherwise you know, if itdidn't matter I wouldn't be
going into that much detail, butthat word later ended up being
a really big part of theconference for me, and so that's
how I knew it was the Lord isbecause I mean, I had that

(13:23):
thought what in the world am Ieven doing buying a t-shirt that
says burn on it?
That's kind of weird.

Oh, my word.

But the Lord knew what he was doing.

I guess he does, he always does.

Yeah, so we even we walked in, we like got our
seats kind of like right in themiddle, and then this is another
little detail you know, god isso in the details but we almost
got up and moved to the frontrow, like over on one side to
sit with another friend, and solike we even stood up and we
were like getting ready to move.
And then I think maybe musicstarted and we're like no, no,

(13:55):
no, we're just going to staywhere we are.
And so we stayed in our seatsand even the worship started and
it was kind of one of thosethings that it was like I don't
even really know these songs.
It was a little bit rough forme just to enter in, because it
wasn't like, oh, this is myfavorite song, or oh, this song
has had, you know, an emotionalimpact on me in the past, like

(14:16):
they were songs that I wasn'treal familiar with.
And so, even entering intoworship, I found myself really
distracted and really having tolike okay, lord, how are you
going to speak to me?
How are you going to havesomething for me if I can't even
focus on you?
Like I was so distracted byeverything else that was going
on.

Yeah, well, I'm so glad that you didn't leave the
way you came.
Yeah, share with us yourtestimony.

Okay, so one of the first speakers was Ashley
Wilhite and she was talkingabout being God's favorite.
And the moment she startedtalking about, like you know,
her being God's favorite and areyou God's favorite?
I immediately was like, well, Idefinitely am not.
So it's a good thing I boughther book out in the foyer

(15:03):
because now there's just onemore thing for me to put on my
list.
Like I've got to figure out howto be God's favorite, because
everybody else is, but not me.
And so again, it still was justalmost disappointment, like
here's one more thing that Ihave to do, and um.
But then she started talkingabout, um, lemons and how they a

(15:26):
lemon, can't just show up andexpect to be lemonade.
And in true you know great kidsministry fashion, she had her
glass and she had her lemons.
And she's talking about likethis lemon cannot just show up
to the conference and expect tobe lemonade.
And that's what I was.
I was like a lemon that justshowed up and I was like, okay,
lord, you know, here I am, makeme into lemonade.

(15:46):
And that can't happen withoutbeing pressed and being changed.
And I was like that's what Ineed, like I need to be changed.
And so at the end of her talk,an altar call came for anybody
who needed spiritual surgery.
And I mean, before the call waseven done, I was the first one

(16:07):
out of my row and I was down atthe front because I was like
that's exactly what I need, likethe vision of God taking a
scalpel and taking his scissorsand his knife and like doing
some spiritual surgery on me iswhat I need.
Like the vision of God taking ascalpel and taking his scissors
and his knife and like doingsome spiritual surgery on me is
what I needed.
Because I had, I just I had allof this kind of disappointment,
just like I said, kind of likea cloak hanging over me, and so

(16:31):
I'm down at the altar justpouring it out, kind of laying
it all at his feet, and I kepthearing the verse over and over
again get rid of all bitterness,rage and anger, you know, and
it goes on, along with brawlingand slander and every form of
malice, and it just keptrepeating in my mind over and
over and over again.
And I was, you know, beingreally honest with the Lord and

(16:53):
just like I, until this moment,I was gonna say I lived most
days pretty angry Like I havesome.
At that moment I had wounds thathad outlasted forgiveness and
that made me angry.
I have people in my life thatdon't always meet my
expectations, and I'm one ofthem.

(17:14):
You know there are other peoplein my life that don't meet up
to my expectations, but I'm oneof them too and that makes me
angry and it's made me bitter,like the lemon that she was
talking about, and I know that.
You know I sure look bright andsunny yellow on the outside,
like a lemon as well, but onebite into me before the Rise Up
conference and you would havegot a sour pucker, because

(17:37):
that's what was inside.
And so I was just kind ofpouring that all out to the Lord
and prophetically, like I heardpeople praying over me and one
of the things I heard was healher wounds that run deep and
that obviously was for me.
And then another one was let go, just help her to let go.

(17:58):
And I was so encouraged becauseI was already in the process of
letting go and getting rid ofthis bitterness, rage and anger,
like I was already there.
But then somebody was prayingover me help her to let it go.
And I was like, yes, that isfor me, and so, you know, I
poured my heart out.
I got up from my seat, or got upfrom, you know, the floor, and

(18:19):
I went back to my seat and Ifelt like, oh man, that right
there, that was the wholeconference.
If the conference would haveended in that moment, it would
have been worth it, wow and so.
But so I went back to my seatand the next two speakers you
know they spoke things that Ineeded to hear about healing,
about freedom and about God'slove, and but there was one

(18:42):
comment that I really wasstruggling with, and it was
God's love can heal anything,and you'll know you've received
that healing when you believeyou are his favorite.
And I was like, oh, I'm havinga hard time with that, because I
know that God loves me.
I knew that God loved me inthat moment, but I did not feel

(19:02):
like his favorite.
I felt like the people thatwere the speakers that night
they were definitely hisfavorite, or the team that put
on Rise Up, or those women whowere praying over me they were
definitely His favorite, but Iwasn't, and so that's why I was
struggling, like, well, yeah,god's love can heal anything,

(19:23):
but if I can't even believe thatI'm His favorite.
How am I going to receive thathealing?
And so, after hearing more aboutrestoration and how God has
more for us, there was anotheropportunity for prayer and I
didn't really feel like I neededto go down because I already
felt like I had had my Jesusmoment.
I was like I already know, likeI'm getting rid of this
bitterness and this rage andanger, like I'm laying that down

(19:46):
at His feet.
So I already had my Jesusmoment.
But I also, like I had thislist of good girl things to do
for when I got home, like yousit in a service and you're like
, okay, so now I know I need todo this and I need to do this
and I need to do this.
And it's all about what do Ineed to do when I get home?
How am I going to be better?

(20:06):
How am I going to achieve allof this?
And so, even though I'd hadthis moment with the Lord, it
was all about me trying to getrid of the bitterness, me
getting rid of the anger, andwhat was I going to do.
And so I knew I needed to letthat go, and so I actually I

(20:29):
decided to.
They called the prayer teamforward and it was kind of those
moments like if you have, ifyou need prayer, you know, feel
free to come forward.
And not, some people weremoving forward but it wasn't
like a flood of people and Ireally didn't feel like I needed
to go forward because I'dalready had my moment.
But I saw one of the women onthe prayer team up front and she

(20:51):
was the one I'd recognized hervoice who had prayed for me to
let it go, just to let things go.
And so I was like you know what?
I'm just going to go share withher, like what that meant to me
, because she didn't know whatwas going on with me.
And so I went forward and Ijust I told her I was like, hey,
you know, I don't really.
You know, I don't know that Ireally need prayer, but this is
when you were praying, let go.
This is what it meant for me.
And and I told her that, even asI was saying that I think I was

(21:15):
realizing, I didn't believe Ireally could do it.
I knew that I needed to, I knewthat I wanted to, but I didn't
believe that I actually could.
And it's like I'd been in thisplace before and I'd been in
this place before and peoplelike me you know good girls who

(21:37):
are good church girls but areexhausted from trying to be good
enough, who are exhausted fromcomparing themselves to others,
like we—I couldn't—girls like mecouldn't actually be free
because, like I, couldn'tactually let it go.
I couldn't live that wayanymore.

(21:57):
I could surrender it at thisconference, but then when I went
home, things were not going tobe different and it was just.
I was just going to have towait until the next conference
to lay it all down again,because I don't know that I
could really keep it at the footof the cross, I felt like I
always kept picking it back up.
So I'm sharing this with her and, in her wisdom, she just began

(22:21):
to pray for me and she's prayingin the spirit, and I'm praying
and I'm overcome with emotionand, before I even realize it,
I'm flat on my back, and so Ihad been slain in the spirit.
I'm flat on my back and so Ihad been slain in the spirit,
and the thing when I, when Ilaid flat on my back, the song

(22:41):
that was playing was thefather's hands are open wide,
and it was like I heard or sawthe Lord with his arms out, and
it was just like a great bigbear hug that he was saying.
And in that moment I knew thatI was his favorite, because I'd
been slain in the spirit before.
But it was a time when I waslike I've seen this happen and I

(23:03):
want this and I'm not leavinguntil it happens.
And so I was seeking after it.
But this night I didn't even godown really for prayer.
I went down to share with herwhat I thought God had already
done, and as I was, as she waspraying for me, I hadn't thought
about it, I hadn't even.
It wasn't even on my radar andthe Lord was like you don't

(23:27):
think you can do this?
Well, I'm going to knock youflat on your back and then
you're going to spend time in mypresence because I'm the one
that does it.
Christina, you're not the onethat has to do it.
You don't have to worry aboutthis list of things to do when
you get home.
You just have to surrender tome and I'm the one who's going
to do it.
And the more you spend time, andit's like he had to knock me

(23:49):
out so that I would just laythere and just, I just laid
there in his arms and I justknew there in his arms and I
just knew.
It's like he knew what I neededwhen I didn't even know what I
needed.
That's right.
And so I just laid there in hispresence and it was.
It was awesome because I, heknew exactly what I needed and

(24:09):
it was a deep soaking in hispresence, and so I laid there as
long as I possibly could andwhen I finally got up, the
weight of the world was not onmy shoulders.
You know, I came up with apiece that you know is better
than understanding.
And then something that was justso cool is that one of the
husbands of a woman who's on theRise Up team came over to me

(24:33):
and he said I need you to knowthat God is working and he's
doing a great work in you.
And I just was like you know,receiving that, okay, yeah,
that's awesome.
And then he said that he hadbeen praying before service and
when he got to the seat that Iwas sitting in, he just felt
such a heaviness, and so he justwas praying for me and I mean

(24:56):
you could have knocked me overwith the feather, because that
was exactly what I had beenfeeling was heavy, like through
the whole evening.
You know, my list of to-dos gotlonger and longer and I, just I
still felt heavy witheverything that I knew I needed
to do and I knew that eventhough that heaviness was gone
in that moment, I knew that itwould come back again.
Even though that heaviness wasgone in that moment, I knew that

(25:18):
it would come back again.
But since I was God's favoritenow I always had been but since
I could like receive it, since Iwas his favorite, I knew that
he would be working to make meinto the sweetest of lemonades.
Like I wouldn't have to, Iwouldn't have to do the work.

He was working and and Marcus confirmed that when
he came over and he said youknow, I was praying over your
seat and I felt this heavinessand God wants you to know he is
working, yes, so one thing Ilove about that part of your
testimony is it shows the fruitthat comes from prayer, Because
the lead team of course getsthere much earlier than everyone

(25:52):
else and we intentionally walkthrough the room praying, laying
hands on the seats and praying,because God knows who's going
to sit in every seat, he knowswho's going to be praying in the
altar, and so every square inchis really prayed over.
And just to hear that testimonyof one of the husbands coming

(26:17):
and speaking that word over you,and it just shows that God so
honors the prayers that gobefore conference or worship
night and it's really incrediblewhen people actually share that
with us.
You know that my seat, I knowmy seat was prayed over.

And I almost moved and I didn't because the
Lord had a word for me, like Ifelt so seen, and so again like
well, of course I'm his favorite, so it's so good, Is there more
?

I feel like I kind of jumped in.

Well, you know the kind of the cherry on top of
the Rise Up conference for me.
So you know that was likeFriday night and you know we
went home and that was awesome.
But then the next morning, youknow, we came back and there was
a word shared about burning thechaff and I had recorded it.

(27:11):
I had presence of mind, like assoon as somebody got up and
they said that they had a word.
I was like I bet this is goodand I recorded it and so I've
been listening to it often.
But it was about that word burnon the t shirt that I thought
was so odd in my first momentsin the Keter Center and it
became such a special word to mebecause it was.

(27:32):
It was woven throughout everytalk, like every single speaker
used the word burn at some pointand it was in the worship time
and the.
The word that was shared is thatyou know that, like when you

(27:52):
know they gather up the wheatand then it has to be beaten in
order for the wheat to come offRight, and then that is
collected and then the Lordburns off the chaff and it's
that yuck, that bitterness, theanger, the rage, the hurt, the

(28:12):
disappointment, whatever that is, but it doesn't get.
You don't burn it off.
He does Right, and it doesn'tcome off without a beating like
but that he's the one that woulddo it.
And so and it's not always beenas easy, you know, as I hope
like being back from conferenceand and sometimes feeling like

(28:34):
I'm still getting beaten on thatthreshing floor, you know, like
the wheat.
But what I keep going back tois that daily there is grain
being stored, like the Lord iscollecting that grain, and daily
he is burning off the chaff.
And I know that years from nowI'll be able to look back at the
conference and it will be, youknow, kind of like a memorial

(28:55):
stone where I go okay, this issomething that the Lord did in
my life, that I came in with allthis disappointment and all of
this beating and all thesethings that I was going through.
But from it the Lord burnedsome chaff off and he's still
doing it daily, but he's storingup grain and he's burning off
chaff and it's not about medoing it.

(29:16):
One of the things she said inthe word was it's all about
surrender and that you have tosurrender in order for him.
I could not surrender and hewouldn't burn off that chaff.
But when I lay down, when I sayyes, and when I lay down and I
obey and I surrender my hurts,my depression, my disappointment

(29:38):
, my anger, all of these battles, when I surrender that to the
Lord, then he does the work, hestores up the grain and he burns
off the chaff.
That's powerful.

I love that you entered looking at a t-shirt
with the word burn, going what?
And then you left going what,yeah.
And then you left going that'sit, yeah, that's good, I mean,
god can just do that.
So I'm so thankful that thatwas your experience, that it
clicked with you what burnreally meant, and so hearts

(30:12):
burning for God, allowing God toburn off the chaff and to walk
in the fullness of what he hasfor us.
So it's exciting.
So since conference, what haslife looked like?
I know that you've startedmentoring and pouring into
another young woman.
So how did you arrive to thatdecision that you wanted to pour

(30:35):
in?
And I'm kind of tying this inwith it because honestly,
christina, because I know youpersonally, I just feel like
what happened at conference wasso significant that the Lord, he
doesn't want us to staycontained, he doesn't want our
vessel to stay contained.
So whatever he's pouring in, weare stewards and we are to pour

(30:59):
out.
And so when you told me thatyou were going to start meeting
with a young woman for mentoring, my heart just did a happy
dance because I knew what Godhad done in part.
I mean, this is the first timeI've heard you tell the entire
testimony, but I knew what Godhad done in you is something he
wants to do in other women, andso just talk about like how did

(31:22):
that come to be that you landedon jumping into this mentorship
with this young woman?

Yeah, so really, even kind of to back up a
little bit in the timeline priorto our DFL, which stands for
Design for Life conference in2023, so October of 2023, so
almost a year prior to Rise Up,I had been really struggling
with depression and I was in areally dark place.

(31:53):
I mean, I love Jesus, but I wasreally struggling and it was
one of the at DFL, there was amoment where he just we were
worshiping and that song, Ithank God, where it talks about
he healed my heart and hechanged my name forever free.
I'm not the same Like hesupernaturally like took that

(32:13):
depression away through througha number of things, but time in
his spirit, through the speakers, but then also just
supernaturally, like he changedmy name from depressed to
blessed, and I know that cansound a little like cliche, but
it was something that like Idon't know that I really did
anything except for that.
I was in his presence and heliterally did it.

(32:34):
And so at that DFL, he alsolaid on my heart to seek out a
mentor, and so I got home fromthat conference and started
seeking out a mentor and I founda woman at our church who said
she would mentor me, and so westarted that really at the
beginning of 2024.

(32:59):
And through that also, you know,she kind of was like well, what
is your Bible time like?
What is your time with the Lordlook like?
And I was like, well, I mean,it's good on some days, but it's
strained at best.
You know, like I, you knowthere have been days where it's
where there's seasons in my lifewhere I feel like it's really
good and then there's seasonswhere I feel like I'm kind of
just going through the motions.

(33:19):
And and so she shared with meyou know what it would look like
, kind of the model that sheused for her Bible time and it
really sparked something in melike a deeper love for the Word
of God.
Because instead of just readingsomething and going on the next

(33:40):
day, like you know, I'm a listperson and so it's easy for me
to be like I'm going to do thisreading plan and I'm going to
read this certain thing everysingle day.
And I'm not knocking that forpeople that that works for, but
for me I felt like I was justlike dipping my toe in the word
every day and like dipping itand pulling it back out and then
dipping it and pulling back out, and it wasn't being

(34:02):
transformational for me.
And so then I was getting maybediscouraged, and so then I
wasn't as eager to do it againthe next day.
And the model that I was taughtwas it was more like a teabag,
steeping in the presence of theLord and hanging out in a
passage of scripture until youhad, like, sucked every single

(34:23):
thing out of it and kind ofevery morning like, okay, I'm
going to look at this passagewith fresh eyes and, lord, what
do you have for me?
And so seeking out a mentor,and then being challenged to try
something different in my Bibletime, those things really
started transforming my life tothe point where I had a really

(34:46):
difficult season in my marriagecome that spring, and it was a
repeat of something that hadhappened the previous year.
The previous year I handled itby just dealing with this
difficult thing was I went intomy room and shut my door and
just like zoned out and watcheda movie on my phone.
And a year later, because of myyes to the Lord about seeking

(35:11):
out a mentor and because of howI was in His Word differently
every day, when the same exactthing came my way instead of
just running to my room to hideby watching a TV show or a movie
.
I went to His Word and I wentto worship and I handled it so
differently and he was sohonored through that that it was

(35:33):
actually I can look back atthat struggle and say that was
like one of the sweetest timesin my marriage because of how
the Lord was working and so,because of those things, I mean,
when the Lord does somethinglike that in your life, you're
just excited to talk about it.
And so I was given theopportunity to share the

(35:56):
devotional at Living Free, whichwas kind of like a Bible study
that met at our church onWednesday nights.
I was asked to share thedevotional and I knew exactly
what it would be about, and itwas about how I was spending my
time in the Lord and how ironsharpens iron and how mentorship
can really be a blessing inyour life and how, if you are

(36:20):
not being mentored like youcould seek that out.
And then also, who could you bementoring?
And so I shared this testimonyand a young lady came up to me
and I shared it and at the end Iwas like I would encourage you
to do these few things, and oneof them was seek out a mentor.
And she comes up to me and shegoes will you be my mentor?

(36:42):
And I was kind of like wow.
I was not expecting that.
I don't know if I'm ready forthat right now, and but I said,
well, you know what I'm going topray about that.
But thank you so much, like Iwas honored that she had
listened and heard what I said,and she had questions about kind
of the model of how I wasspending time with the Lord, and
so when she asked me to mentor,I said I'm going to pray about

(37:04):
that.
And so, of course, as I'mpraying about it, the Lord is
like, yes, I mean you challengedher to do that, you encouraged
her to do that, and you know howimpactful it's been in your
life.
How can you say no?
And so I said, okay, yeah, thisis what I think this is going
to look like, and I, you know,set up some boundaries, like

(37:24):
this is what this is going tolook like and this is what I'm
available and this is how we'regoing to do it.
And all through listening tothe Lord first and asking Him
like what do you want this tolook like?
Because I've not really I'vebeen in other mentorship
relationships in the past andI've kind of mentored other
girls in the past, but I was inthis place where I'm just like

(37:44):
Lord, I'm not doing anything ifit's not you.
And so what does this look like?

And it looks a little different than it has in
the past, and so yeah, it soundslike there's some serious
intentionality just with, like,what are we doing and why are we
doing it?
Right, yeah, yeah, and thatprobably stems from the changes
that have happened in your timewith the Lord just through the
word and prayer.

(38:08):
I love that and I think bothyou and I would strongly
encourage people, and I thinkboth you and I would strongly
encourage people if you don'thave a mentor, pray, right, yeah
, because I think we getsometimes an idea in our mind of
, like you know, we see someonewho is farther along in the
journey than us and we just kindof assume that's the person

(38:36):
that I want to mentor meSometimes that doesn't work out.

I mean, I've been through that before, right?
Yeah, well, even I mean tospeak to that.
When we first started attendingJames River, we'd left a church
where we had been involved andwe didn't really know anybody,
and it had been some time.
But I felt the Lord encouragingme to find a mentor.
And I'd reached out to a coupledifferent women and one said
yes, but then she was movinglike almost right away, and so I

(39:01):
was like well, that's not goingto work, you know.
And then there was another one,and but then, scheduling wise,
like we just couldn't get it towork out.
And so, even though I was like,well, lord, you asked me to do
this, like my first two attemptswere kind of didn't really work
out, and so I'd kind of givenup and put it on the back burner

(39:22):
.
And then he said here's anotherperson I want you to talk to.
And I said OK, I'll give it atry.
You know, kind of half thinkinglike oh, my goodness, I don't
know if I can, what if this onedoesn't work out either?
But then it didn't, it did workout and it was great.
Yes, that's so encouraging,yeah, so don't give up.
Don't give up If the firstperson you ask can't do it,

(39:47):
because I mean we're all busyand we all have things that
maybe it doesn't work out forthem in that season, but that
doesn't mean that there isn'tsomebody somebody else that God
has for you.

Well, I can say just from personal experience,
I'm so thankful for the olderwomen that have mentored me and
I'm so thankful for the youngerwomen that I have had the
pleasure and joy and honor ofmentoring, because you get to
watch people grow in the Lord,and what could be better than
that?

(40:12):
I mean it's true discipleship.
You know, it's more than just.
I mean I love to get togetherand have a coffee with another
sister in Christ, but there isnothing better than really
talking about what is Godteaching you in the Word Right?
What are you hearing from theLord in prayer?
And those conversations arewhat really like.

(40:33):
It's that process of iron,sharpening iron, because you can
encourage each other andchallenge each other.
So I'm so glad that we got totalk about that for a little bit
.
Well, christina, I know thatyou've battled a lot of things.
You've shared many of thosethings depression, anger,

(40:53):
bitterness.
Any of those things depression,anger, bitterness.
What encouragement would yougive to someone who's listening?
Because we have lots oflisteners Just want to stop here
.
We don't have lots ofsubscribers, so please subscribe
to our podcast.
We get analytics so we know wehave lots of listeners.
But there's someone listeningtoday or this evening, whenever

(41:15):
they happen to turn it on, andthey're struggling with one of
those things.
What encouragement would yougive them?

Yeah, well, you know I got to, you know, think
about this question ahead oftime, and there are several
things I feel like that could beencouraging, depending on what
season of life you're in, butand so these are in not in order
of importance, but just kind ofjust all of these things.
But I think you know one thinglike making room on your

(41:46):
schedule for things like Rise Upconferences and Design for Life
, women's conferences, timeswhere you can get away from the
daily grind of your life, andlike spend really quality time
with the Lord.
You know we encourage our kidsto go to youth camp and kids

(42:07):
camp, and as adult women, weneed that too, and so I think
that is one thing that, ifthat's not something that you
just budget for and you don'tput it on your calendar, I think
that's really important.
I also think you knowmentorship like looking for
somebody who is further along intheir journey with Jesus,

(42:30):
somebody who you admire andyou're like this is what I want
to be like when I grow up.
Find somebody like that and askthem if they can mentor you.
And then also you know thissounds so cliche, but being in
your word daily, I mean that, ofcourse, that's always the right
church answer, but being in theword in a way that it's

(42:51):
transformative for you, thatyou're not just checking the box
every day and that you're notdoing it out of you, that you're
not just checking the box everyday and that you're not doing
it out of duty, but you're doingit out of desire, because you
are really going.
Okay, lord, what are you goingto speak to me today?
And if you find yourself whereyou're not in that place, if
you're in the place where you'redoing it because you feel like
you have to, then there'ssomething wrong with the way

(43:13):
you're going about it and somaybe seek out somebody like a
mentor and say you know, what doyou do, or what can I do
differently, or what piece am Imissing?
Because the Word of God isalive and active and it is not
going to return void.
If you're not experiencing thatin your Bible time, then maybe
you need to do somethingdifferent.

(43:34):
That in your Bible time, thenmaybe there's a.
You need to do somethingdifferent.
And what I, what I changed inmy Bible time, was not like
rocket science, but it was.
It's what I needed to do inorder to experience the power
that is the word of God.
Yeah, and, and then anotherthing, as you were talking about
, like you know, hearing aboutwhat you know, not just going
out to coffee with a friend andtalking about you know hearing

(43:54):
about what you know, not justgoing out to coffee with a
friend and talking about youknow, skincare or our kids, but
surrounding yourself withfriends that when you talk to
them, it's what is the Lorddoing in your life, like I, have
two friends that we talk dailyand we talk about those things
like our kids, and you knowdifferent.
You know talk about thosethings like our kids and you
know different.
You know fall traditions, butour conversations are 90% about

(44:18):
today.
In my Bible time, this is whatthe Lord said to me, or when I
was praying, this is how theLord was challenging me, or when
I girls, I need you to lift meup in prayer because I'm
struggling with this thought andwe're able to say that's a lie
from the enemy.
So, having surrounding yourselfwith people like that, if you
like, if you're feeling isolated, that is not the enemy would

(44:41):
love for you to be isolated.
That's when bitterness andanger and depression can seek in
, and so don't be isolated, butsurround yourself with friends
that they're also like strivingto grow spiritually, friends
that they're also like strivingto grow spiritually.
So, and then even also, youknow, more, more encouragement
that I would give would be takethese things to Jesus, because

(45:03):
you know, ultimately, like therewas no magical formula that
that changed any of these thingsin my life.
It's not like I read, I read acertain book, certain book, or
it wasn't even necessarily thespeakers at Rise Up or at DFL.
It was taking it to Jesus andlike being really honest with
Him, being completely, you know,vulnerable and surrendering

(45:27):
these things before Him and notbeing afraid that, like if I
said you know that I'm angryabout this or I'm bitter about
this, or I I said you know thatI'm angry about this, or I'm
bitter about this, or or I'mfeeling you know that I'm I felt
like I was in the pit ofdepression, like that wasn't
going to scare him away.
He wasn't going to bedisappointed in me or love me
any less if I just laid it outat his feet.
But being honest with him andlike laying it out because once

(45:50):
you, really, if you give it toJesus, then he can completely
change your perspective on thatsituation that you're in and
that's what he did with me andfixing my eyes on him and
getting them off of my situation.
You know I could have veryeasily stayed in any of those
places and with these thingsthat I was battling.

(46:11):
As long as you look at the wavesand like, if you, you know a
picture of Jesus walking on thewater and he calls Peter out to
him.
You know, as long as Peter'seyes were on Jesus, he was able
to walk on the on top of thosewaves.
But the moment he was lookingat the waves, which your waves
could be depression, or yourwave is, you know your

(46:34):
disappointment in your family oryour you know the anger that
you have, for you know thingsthat happened to you in your
childhood.
As long as you're focused onthose waves of your life, you
are going to sink beneath them.
But fixing your eyes on Him andsurrendering everything to Him,
that is what's really going tochange it.

(46:56):
And so sometimes, you know, Iwould encourage you to find a
verse that maybe it is, you know, fixing my eyes on Jesus, the
author and perfecter of my faith.
Maybe that's a verse that youcan hold on to or get rid of all
bitterness, rage and angerRight after that.
It says be kind andcompassionate one to another,
forgiving each other just asChrist, god, forgave you.

(47:17):
So finding a verse that can beyour verse, that you can cling
to and it may change throughoutdifferent seasons of your life,
but clinging to a verse anddeclaring that over your life,
that's going to be what's goingto really make a huge change.
And then, finally, also juststop believing the lies that the
enemy has for you.

(47:38):
He would lie to you and say thatyou're never going to be able
to walk on the water, you'renever going to be able to be
free of these things, but thoseare lies from the enemy, and so
you can't just stop believinglies, though I feel like
sometimes people can feeldiscouraged when someone's like,
well, just stop believing thelies that the enemy tells you.

(47:59):
And I know I've been in a placebefore where I'm like, yeah, but
how do I do that?
How do I just I can't just stopbelieving them.
I feel like they're soingrained in me, or I've made
these agreements since I was achild, and so how do you stop
believing them?
And you have to replace it withtruth.

(48:20):
So that's where thosescriptures come in is what lies
are you believing and name themand then find truth in the
scripture that combats that, andthen that's what you want to
start declaring of your life.
And when you do that, when youreplace the lie with the truth,
that's when you're going to beable to stand like, conquer
those battles and stand on topof those things.

You have given such encouragement and direction
.
You know, for someone who'sseeking, and I believe with all
my heart there are listeners.
They're seeking, they're tryingto navigate a difficult
situation.
Maybe they're not opening theword.
I just feel really compelled bythe Holy Spirit to share this,

(48:57):
and I hadn't planned on it.
But if you are struggling tojust open the Bible and read,
you don't know where to start.
You don't know what to do otherthan just read the chapter and
that's not a bad thing, Believeme.
If that's what you do, that'sawesome.
But if you want to startconnecting your heart to the

(49:19):
Word, ask the Lord this question.
It's very simple.
I'm going to suggest you go toPsalm 23.
It's a very familiar psalm.
It's very short.
It's very powerful.
Ask the Lord this question.
Just say, Father, what do youwant me to know?

(49:40):
As I read this psalm today andthen read the psalm with that
question in your mind, just overand over God, what do you want
me to know?
And then you know whetheryou're writing it down or you're
just speaking it out loud.
Just starting there will changethe way you engage with the

(50:05):
Word, Because you're not goingto close the Bible with this
question.
Well, what do I take from that,or what did I gain from that?
You're going to have a specific, even if it's one thing that
you leave the psalm yeah, goahead, Not just know in your
head.
Right, not just in your mind.

Being a girl who grew up in church my whole life
and I never really walked awayfrom the Lord, I know a lot in
my head, but that was theconnect for me is when I started
reading God's Word and going.
Lord, what do you want me toknow deep down in my heart, Not
just in my head, but in my heart?

Yeah, because there's a big difference.
I mean there really is, becauseI grew up in church and I was
in church three times a week mywhole life and actually have
read the Bible for most of myadult life.
For well, I shouldn't say formost of my adult life, but from,

(51:05):
like you know, my teens untilmy early 30s.
I was reading for headknowledge, but that shifted for
me.
Thank you, lord Jesus.

Right, like I can quote Psalm 23, psalm 23.
I know it in my head, but if Idon't know the Lord is my
shepherd, there's nothing that Iwill have to want because he
provides all my needs.
If I don't know that deep downin my heart, it's a very
different thing.

Yeah, and so that's my encouragement today
for listeners is ask the Lord,what do you want me to know, not
just in my with Him, becauseintellect disconnected from the
heart doesn't grow intimacy withChrist, right so.

(52:00):
But when you connect the mindand the heart to God's Word,
that is when you really you alsowill grow a spiritual hunger.
And I know it's true because ithappened for me, it's happened
for you and so many women thatGod's blessed me to be in
relationship with.
This is their, this is therhythm of life they're living,
and it's it's not because it'sjust happened, it's it.

(52:24):
It requires us to, to ask himto help, right, like, help me,
lord, to know what you want meto take from your word today for
my heart, and then it flows outof our heart into other people.
That's the really beautifulthing is that it becomes a
pouring out, and so I'm sograteful that you took your time
to be with us, christina.

(52:46):
Your testimony is such ablessing, and I would love if we
could just pray over ourlisteners now.
Sure, okay, I'll lead that out.
Okay, father, god, we thank youthat you are a God who
transforms your people, that youdo not leave us the same God.

(53:07):
When we hunger and we thirstfor your righteousness, you fill
us, and so it is our prayer,christina and I come in
agreement, lord, that we'reasking for every listener, lord,
to have a greater desire to bein your word, lord, to be in
prayer, to be connected withother believers who are

(53:32):
like-minded in their pursuit ofyou, in their pursuit of
intimacy with you.
We praise you, god, that youare not a faraway God.
You are Emmanuel, god with us,a personal and up-close Father,
and we thank you for the bloodof Jesus that allows us to come
to your throne boldly, to findgrace and help and mercy in our

(53:56):
time of need.
So, god, if there are thosestruggling with depression,
anger, bitterness, malice, rage,lord, we just pray your Holy
Spirit would do a mighty work intheir heart right now.
Just draw them close to you,lord.
We pray that your Holy Spiritwould meet with them, would

(54:17):
guide and counsel and directthem.
Lord, thank you for theopportunity to just speak of
what you are doing in the livesof your people.
We pray that your name isglorified, your name is
magnified, because you areworthy of it all.
Holy God, we love you, lord, wegive you the praise and it is

(54:39):
in the holy and mighty name ofJesus.
We pray Amen.
Thank you again for listening.
We are so thankful that youjoined us for this episode.
Be sure to check us out onFacebook or our website at
itstimetoriseuporg.
Instagram.
At the underscore officialunderscore rise.

(55:03):
Underscore up.
We pray.
God's grace and peace will bewith you In Jesus' mighty name.

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Nothing Had Changed yet Everything Had Changed with Christina Hess - 7

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Nothing Had Changed yet Everything Had Changed with Christina Hess - 7