March 17, 2025 • 51 mins
Ever scroll past an influencer’s perfect morning routine: 5AM workouts, flawless lipstick, and a color-coded calendar and think, “LOL, absolutely not”? Same.
This episode is basically a judgment-free zone for life’s hot mess moments. We’re talking about those questionable intimacy signals in marriage (because sometimes a cuddle is just a cuddle, OK?!), plus some business lessons that prove “go big or go home” is actually kinda terrible advice.
Oh, and we have to get into the Ruby Franke documentary! seriously, it’s next-level creepy. Who knew a wholesome family YouTube channel could go that dark? Yikes.
So if you’ve ever felt like you’re barely holding it together while the internet makes life look effortless. Congrats, you’re one of us!
Hit play, laugh with us, and let’s embrace the beautiful chaos that is real life. 😆🔥
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Jerking Around, a podcast that makes you
feel better about yourself,because we're a mess just like
you, and Crystal makes fun of methe whole time and it's great
and it's real.
Welcome to Jerking Around.
(00:25):
Welcome.
Tisha's having an attitudeproblem today.
She's in mourning.
I'm just going to drink yourwater.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
I'm just getting a drink, I'm trying to hydrate,
you know.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
Yeah, so when she's dark like this, it means she's
going to say something reallyinappropriate.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Something nasty.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
Your nail, though you've got to stop.
No, it's fine.
She does this thing where shelifts her nail like a nervous
condition.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
It's like a nervous.
Well, I used to bite my nails,so now I have like the hard gel,
which I love, the hard gel.
But now I pick at my nail likeI lift them and I just do weird
things, so she's killing it.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
So now it's like a nub and she's trying to hide it
from me.
Well, no, it's not a nub.
The hard gel came off.
It looks nub like it's verysmall.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
It's a little nubby Well she filed it down to even
it and then it was too short.
When it first fell off, it wasfine, if you keep lifting from
here.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
I think we're going to have the brain back.
We used to in high schoolbecause it had tentacles no
she'd suck on her fingers no,weird, I didn't.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
She does that still, if you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
No, oh yeah, I would bite my nails and like my finger
would get waterlogged from,like, and it would look kind of
brainy.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
It wasn't, yeah yeah don't recommend.
I know my kids bite their nails, some of them CJ does, yeah,
and I'm always like don't biteyour nails.
And his nails are so low I'mlike oh it, it looks like it
hurts.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
I don't mess with my nails.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
I'm like don't do it.
And then when he's doing it,he's like but I used to do that.
Yeah, I was like you need acleanse like a pair, you know,
like a parasite, cleanse CauseI've heard that that's like a
part.
You know, ticks and differentnervous behaviors are part of if
you have parasites.
Great, there's Bytisha.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Yeah, it's great, we're really doing it.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
If you're a nail biter, try a parasite cleanse,
just saving the world, oneparasite at a time.
Where do you get a parasitecleanse?
There's different things youcan do.
There's all different.
Like at the grocery store.
No, I think you have to orderthem yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
Yeah, like at the grocery store.
No, I think you have to orderthem.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Yeah, yeah, it's herbs, melissa knows.
Yeah, melissa's into it.
So have you done one?
No, but I want to.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Well, get going.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
I know.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Why not?
Speaker 2 (02:31):
I know I should.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
Get one today and then tell us about it next week.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
All right, see you later.
Guys, I'm going to get you know.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
So our week?
Nothing exciting like last week.
We had a cheer competitionShocking this weekend.
The girls did really well Lotsof metal detectors everywhere.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Yeah, it was a different vibe.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
Lots of police From the nacho fight.
It really turned things around.
I felt safe, though I felt safetoo.
I felt way better.
Yeah, the metal detectors, theyvery much checked everyone.
Yeah, you had that one checkwhere they took you in the back
room yeah, and you loved it.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
The strip search yeah , they were like, yeah, now body
cavity check, you know, and Iwas like, oh well, it's been a
while.
So I'm just kidding, and ithasn't been a while.
Wish it had been a while kindof Cavities are to the back, no
cavities in there, yeah, bothholes.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
so which one has it been a while?
Speaker 2 (03:22):
no, that one's been.
Never the the normal has been a.
It's been a while.
No, it hasn't been a while.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
I wish it'd been a while this is getting, I feel,
really upset.
Yeah, so, anyways.
So you've been doing it.
A lot is what you want to talkabout.
I mean, when you come back fromout of town, does he really
want to catch?
No, but you said, kyle did yeah, and I was like I'm not ready
to catch up.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
Well, that was like a traumatic comeback.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Yeah, I was like I told you, I got back and I was
like feeling wounded and I gotin bed that night and I was
thinking, oh poor me, I'm scared.
And you know what's kind ofweird, when I was followed in
Vegas, yeah, I was just gonnasay whenever the same thing
(04:07):
happened, yeah, I got in bed allscared it's and I like cuddled
up and then I just been followedby these like five random
almost taken almost taken.
I don't feel like doing itafter that yeah, but he thinks
it's the green light.
It's a little like what's goingon.
I think it's the cuddle.
Do you ever not want to cuddle?
Because you know that's what'sgonna happen all the time.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
Yeah, yeah, I'll play dead.
He's like cuddling and I justlay there and he's like geez and
I'm like well, no, because thenyou're going to take it as a
green light.
Yeah and no, it's not a greenlight.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
It's like frustrating because I don't mind a cuddle.
I'm like he'll rub my back andI like that part yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
But I'm not always ready for the whole thing.
Right, trying to give the wrongsignal.
Sometimes I feel like if Icuddle or sometimes if I just my
feet are cold, I'll put them onhim.
He thinks that's the go.
He thinks it's the go and I'mlike, no, I'm just I have cold
feet.
So I have to say, hey, can youget my heating pad?
Because then I'm by myself.
You know, because if I'mrubbing up on him, then he
(04:58):
thinks that it's like the green.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
I know I wonder if that's a problem in many
marriages.
Like you, stop cuddling.
The other night he was likecome after I got home from being
traumatized, try to go to bed.
It happened.
And he has this thing where ifI say no or if I'm like, nah, I
do that too.
It's like the biggest challengeand it's happening.
So I don't know.
I got to switch that up Cause Iwas like, and then he's like oh
, I'll get that no to a yes.
(05:22):
Yeah, you know, it's not likeinappropriate or anything, it's
a yes before it happens, but ifhe rubs me more than 10 minutes,
it's a green light for sure.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
Yeah, because I like am so grateful.
Oh, my oh.
I've done hours rubbing.
I'm all good night.
Are you serious Hours?
Yeah, like two shows.
Speaker 1 (05:42):
He rubs you the whole show.
Yeah, he's rubbed the whole,but is he trying and you say no?
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Well, he doesn't have a choice, because I throw my
leg over and he'll like rub myknee or my leg.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Like Kyle just starts , I'm not like saying no after
that.
Is he like trying to make ithappen and you say no, or he
doesn't try.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Well, again, it's like the signal, so like if he's
rubbing my knee and my leg,then he'll like try to like Rub
up it.
It'll kind of try to drift.
And then if I'm like lettingthe drift happen, and sometimes
I'll like reposition the drift,you know, and then I'm like, and
like my leg was sprawled overon him and then he was rubbing
my knee and it was fine, andthen all of a sudden he tries.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
And then I like throw my leg back on my side and then
he gets.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
He gets the like the drift or he gets like subtle
messages.
Yes, he knows if you close yourleg.
Speaker 1 (06:34):
It's no, it's a no.
Or if I have to be rejected,yes, yeah, because I'm not gonna
be like no if he starts likereally going yeah, I'm not gonna
be mean, you know, yeah that'sthe thing like.
If once it like goes to acertain point, you can't say no
it you can't say no, it'd beawkward yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Except I feel like the other day yesterday, our
house cleaner was coming and hewas like, what do you mean by
coming?
She was coming, she gets thereat like nine and so it's a small
window from the school drop offto the.
What if she's early, exactly,and she just comes in our house?
So it's not like A knock or adoorbell.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Right.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
So I got home from dropping the kids off and then
he was wanting to, you know,play and I was like, oh, no
Josie's coming.
And he was like thinking it was.
So what happened?
Let's make it quick.
And I was like no Josie'scoming, so we didn't do it
sounds so wrong.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
I know it does.
It's kind of it was a no, butit wasn't like he was touching
you.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Oh yeah, no, he was trying and I was like no, get
the heck off me.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
It wasn't like there's a certain point where
you can't say no, it'd be sorude, or can you?
I can Like if he's touchingyour private, you'll just be
like no.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
Well, I'll just roll over and get out of there, or
I'll like move his hand, I don'tknow.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
Just it's clear you know, really yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
So do you say the word no or does it just like you
roll over and run?
I'll say like I'm tired or goodnight, or like no ease.
You know, I'll add the IES tobe like not so rude.
Yeah, and you say no ease, yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:03):
And what does he say?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
please ease's.
No, he just like gets it andthen he's kind of irritated.
You know, yeah, yeah, and Isometimes I care if he's
irritated.
Sometimes I'm too tired, Idon't care if he's irritated.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
When I used to watch the Duggars.
I used to love the Duggars Um,things have changed a lot since,
but she was like you never sayno to your husband.
You're the only one in theworld that can give him that
gift.
So anytime he wants it, you gotto be giving that gift.
Yeah, do you believe that?
So I go both ways?
Yeah, I do think you should,because, like my mom said, it
(08:34):
starts in the morning, you earnit in the morning and I like
that.
She always made my dad earn it,but they were like fiends,
fiend like the song.
Yeah, they were always doing it.
But, like for me, sometimeswhat happens is like you get on
that bad path where you'reannoyed by each other and you're
being short with each other.
The last thing I feel likedoing is doing it.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
You gotta just do it, you gotta do it.
So like it's confusing, youknow.
I think it depends.
I think you don't need to maybealways say yes, you, you can
say I'm tired, maybe not in away that it's like withholding
or mean, but just like, oh, I'vebeen like, hey, I'm tired, can
we do it in the morning?
I've said that when I'm notlike, do you follow through?
Yeah, usually Okay.
Where I'm not like denying it'slike you're a loser, I'm just
(09:13):
tired, yeah, I'm not like.
Ah, you know.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
Yeah, like we talk about sex a lot in marriage but
I mean I'm no pro at themarriage thing or the sex thing,
I just go off of what likethey've taught us at church and
Dr Laura, some friends reallybig yeah, some friends have said
they don't say no and it'sgreat, you know friends, yeah,
no, I'm asking.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
I didn't say anyone oh yeah and they're super cute
and I do think it is good.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
But, like with that person, that friend of us and
she does listen, not all thetime, but she is a jerky, the
friend of ours.
They've only been with eachother.
And I always think that whenyou've only been with one person
ladies and young people thatlisten, because we have a lot of
young people don't do it untilyou're married, because it does
bond you better.
Yeah, people don't do it tillyou're married because it does
bond you better.
(10:05):
Yeah, we've been blessed tohave that gift too.
Yes, you know, but I just thinkI think it's the no is
different when, like, you'venever been with a guy that was
using you or didn't make youfeel safe well, that's what I'm
saying.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
If he's being a jerk, I'm not doing it.
Get the heck out of here.
Yeah, those days have passedyeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Yeah, I'm not on the side of the freeway anymore,
exactly, you know.
Yeah, no, I agree, but I feellike for our friend it's like a
lot, it's like three times aweek and she's like you.
Just, you know, I go up thereand I put him to bed and I take
care of him and then I go watchmy shows and he's happy as a
cucumber.
Yeah, because I put him, it'sgood.
Yeah, and I do like that aboutat night because I like to watch
(10:43):
TV and Kyle doesn't, my husband.
So if I do the thing, then Ican watch TV.
Then you get your freedomBecause, like, if he's, if I
don't watch TV, he's like turnit down, turn it down, turn it
down.
Once I do do that, it's likehe's right to sleep, yeah, but
it wakes me up, it's likecaffeine.
Yeah, yeah and it's like always, I always joke with him.
I'm like when I'm almost asleepit's like your favorite, is it
(11:05):
because I don't know?
Just say, I'm like that.
That b words finally shut hermouth.
Oh yeah, like because I'malways young.
And then when I'm almost asleep, I'm like quiet.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
Yeah, I'm like, is that why he's all, finally,
finally just shut her mouth, youknow, and he laughs.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
It's like when I say hike, but um, I feel like he
does think that sometimes,because I get like yeah, I don't
know about you, but and Kylelistens, so I have to be very
careful with how I word it.
But sometimes for me this ishappening to me this weekend.
I don't know if it's becausewe're on a girls' trip, but like
I get used to like my rhythmwithout Kyle, yeah, and I try to
(11:40):
explain this to him Like whenthe kids get ready for the
morning, it's super calm, likethere's not.
I actually don't really likespaz on my kids a lot, like it's
very, very calm.
I don't really have to is, andso I get like you're throwing my
(12:02):
mojo off.
But I'm not trying to underminehim, but I get sometimes where
it's like I just get likeannoyed, you know, yeah, it's
like he'll wake up and he's likechecking for everything and
like this is, this room isn'tclean and this isn't done, and
I'm like whoa, whoa, whoa.
It's Saturday morning.
This is like the first Saturdaywe had where we didn't get up
and out, right, so it was likehe wants to get things done, but
(12:23):
I'm like that's not how we roll.
We roll very calm in themornings.
So I don't know, it's reallyhard, I feel, for people that's
husbands work out of town andcome back.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
That has to be a really hard transition yeah, we
were talking to our friend aboutthat and her husband travels
and she says it's a transitionwhen he comes home because she's
like hold on, we had our wholething and now it's all thrown
off.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Yeah, that's how I feel.
Yeah, like when I'm more, Ifeel like it's because we were
gone and like we've I've.
Just I haven't been around himas much, so it was harder for me
this weekend right, because youwere like nails on a chalkboard
and not him.
It's just like he cares aboutthe things I don't care about,
and that's what makes us work.
But anytime I try to bettermyself.
That's what's hard, I think, inmarriage.
(13:05):
When one person starts reallygrowing and the other one isn't
growing with them, I thinkthat's gotta be really hard.
Yeah, and I feel like I've seenthat happen with couples.
One person really gets healthyor gets sober and then the other
person they divorce.
So I read books in the mornings.
I've talked about it since 75Heart.
I listen to books every morningbecause I try to fuel my brain
(13:27):
before the day takes over andit's something that really helps
me.
So I'm reading.
I told you guys about this book.
I read about how to win.
It's called how to Win Friendsand Influence People.
It's like an old school book.
Kyle called this morning whenwe were driving and he was like
they're talking about AbrahamLincoln.
I'm over it, yeah, but it'sreally interesting.
It's about, like, how to winpeople over by being positive
more than, um, negative in aleadership role, which is really
(13:49):
interesting.
Um, I recently I'm just beinggoing to be honest like Kristen
Cavalieri, we I recently lostone of our team members at real
estate.
You know you guys have been onthis journey with us.
I was quitting a year ago.
I'm back.
Business is actually super goodfor us right now.
The team's doing amazing, theteam's super small, but I just
(14:10):
lost someone One of my very,very, very close agents.
She's been with me for sevenyears, so it was really hard on
me the last couple weeks becauseI'm very personal and like what
did I do wrong?
How could I have handled thisbetter?
Was I not enough?
You know and things have justchanged a lot in the last year
since my dad's passed and I maybe a different leader, but I,
(14:30):
reading this book, I'm learning.
Did I motivate the right way?
Did I give enough?
Um, oh, it's making me.
Did I give enough?
Oh, it's making me emotional.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
Did.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
I give enough, like Tom, it's okay, like I don't
know.
It talked about how this isreally weird.
I haven't been crying a lot atall either, so it's super weird.
But did I give enough likepositive reinforcement?
And I think that's why, likeKyle, was nails on a chalkboard
for me, because I'm reading thebook on how to like motivate
(14:58):
people by positivity and maybeI'm like feeling guilty about
that, because as a leader, Ilike things done.
A certain way I'm very laidback in life, but at work Tisha
would agree Like everything forWhole Twerf Homes is done.
We have very high expectationsand I wondered did I not make
that person feel valued, feelspecial, feel like her or his
(15:22):
opinion mattered?
It's a her, but, um, I don'tknow.
And it talked about howimportant it is for people to
feel valued.
That's like everyone's mainneed and I'm like how often does
that happen, even at home?
Like I was telling you thismorning, I forgot to pay for
Hudson's cheer fee and and Ifeel like sometimes with Maddie
I didn't forget as much withstuff because she's first, and
I'm like that didn't make Hudsonfeel valued.
(15:43):
Right, that, like I did, thatwasn't a priority of mine and
sometimes, like we've been outof town a lot and I'm like maybe
Broxton's not feeling he's beenacting up a little when we're
like together and I think heneeds my attention, right.
I'm like how often do peopleleave a relationship or a
business, or even a friendship?
I've had a lot of friends.
This is really like therapyright now.
I've had a lot of friends thatstruggle with me because they
(16:05):
don't feel valued because I'm sobusy, right.
I don't know, it's a reallygood book, but it's very what's
that word?
Um, when you're being notconvicting, convicting, very
convicting for me, which Iactually love, like when I love
when something's convicting, butthis book is very convicting
for me, yeah, and I feel like alot of leadership books because
I've read them for years.
(16:26):
I actually am like yep, yep, notlike I have it all figured out
whatsoever, but this one waslike like every word.
I'm like Whoa.
I was seeing it as holding highexpectations means holding
everyone accountable, like every, every level should be here,
and if you're not here, I'mgonna say it and I'm like real
proud of myself that in myleadership field, I'm very
(16:47):
honest, I'm very up front.
I don't like keep a lot in, butis that the best thing?
Is there a better way?
I could have said things likeyou know a more motivating way
he talks out in the book andthey talked about at church.
Even the best way to get themost out of people is compliment
when they're doing what youwant, right.
But like with our kids, that'skind of what happened on
Saturday morning.
It was like the, the laundry'snot done and your room's a mess,
(17:08):
and I'm like we're pointing out10 things everyone did wrong,
instead of like the one timethey cleaned their room being
like I love when you clean yourroom like that, like that's the
that makes me so happy.
You know what I mean.
Even with our husbands I'm like, I'm so, I'm pretty positive
with the kids, to be honest, butwith Kyle I'm not.
I'm like, ah, why'd you do thatInstead?
Speaker 2 (17:25):
of like.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
Hey, I love when you get home and you take rocks and
you don't yell at us but it'shard to rewire your brain
because when you want to say,like, what not to do instead of
saying what to do, yeah, like asa coach, that's like a big
thing I am is like thepsychology of telling your
athletes what to do instead ofwhat not to do.
Right, like, hey, let's makesure we hit everything instead
(17:48):
of don't fall on that, right,it's like a very positive
mindset.
So you're focused on what to do, not what not to do.
Speaker 2 (17:54):
Right.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
But then in other areas it's like you know, kyle,
stop yelling at the kids andyou're being like, and I'll say
like you're being annoying andthey don't want a dad like that,
and that's like horrible.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
It's not being positive.
Yeah, but you're only human,yeah, no-transcript you.
(18:25):
Yeah, that's good yeah, but Ifeel like with you know the team
member that left, I thinksometimes I think it's great
that you take things so personal, because I think that's what
makes you a great leader,because you you are thinking
it's something that you canalways, it's always in your
control to fix and makeeverything great for everybody.
But sometimes people are juston their own path and I think
(18:46):
sometimes we never are going tonaturally leave our comfort zone
and so sometimes things justhappen to us and it doesn't mean
you weren't a great leader oryou aren't a great leader.
I think you are.
I think maybe it's justsometimes things run their
course and it's hard, and Ithink it's great that you're
reflecting and it'll only makeyou better for the remaining
team members, you know, but Idon't think it was anything you
(19:09):
did wrong.
I think time, yeah, and you werejust going through your own
thing and and that person'sgoing through their own thing.
They're going through your ownthing and and that person's
going through their own thing.
They're going through lifethings too.
You know, like our kids aregetting older, you know going,
going away.
So there's so many things Ithink you just need to.
I do see what you're sayingabout being positive, but
(19:30):
there's also like you have toalso not take it all on yourself
.
You're you're not solelyresponsible for making someone
feel valued.
You know, because you're human.
The only person that can evertruly fulfill that for everyone
is God, and so if, if we'relooking like my husband can't
fulfill my every need, you, asmy boss, can't fulfill my every
(19:52):
need you know.
Speaker 1 (19:53):
So just trying to make you not think it's you
Right, and I do think things allhappen for a reason.
Yeah, it's like we have friendstoo that are going through
things.
Tisha and I are on probably 20group texts with me and her and
someone else, me and her andsomeone else.
It's pretty funny.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
It's like we're like the dynamic duo, like, yeah,
it's like drinking around hasturned into like and I think
that's part of it.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
Yeah, it's like, we do this together we do work
together.
It's kind of like we do lifetogether in a weird yeah, um,
let's be honest way.
Let's be honest yeah, but we'renot lesbians, as you guys know,
but one of us wants to be well,I like that new girl at cheer
now, so she does have this girlshe really likes.
I have a crush.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Yeah, it's something kind of like the guy I like saw
this shirt in my closet theother day and I was like oh, she
wore something like that.
And I was like I wonder if Iwear that.
And then I was like what iswrong with you, you know?
No, you are really into her too.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
It's real funny, it's so weird.
Yeah, she's great though.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
But I think sometimes pivot is sometimes and we
talked about this before, causeI saw it on a, on a short but,
like God's, pivot is sometimes ablessing and I do feel like all
everything happens for a reason, but I do always try to like,
learn and grow from everything,which you should.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
That's the if you can take away a learning experience
from something happening thathurts you, then it's positive,
you know.
So that's a great quality.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
But Well, it's funny because on the way here we were
talking, it doesn't always meanyou need to change everything.
I know you're right and, on theway, here we were talking about
a lot of things that we'll getinto, because we kind of just
try to outline what we're goingto talk about.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Right.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
But it's funny because years ago when we
started growing the team, it waslike so exciting and if any of
you are realtors or anyone outthere that has thought about
growing a team in any capacity,I, you guys know, if you listen,
I like to be more like thebigger and better kind of person
.
Tisha's more like content withsmaller private.
We're like opposite, like that.
(21:45):
So, when real estate took offand then our team started to
grow, it was exciting for me.
I'm like, okay, let's be thebest team and the biggest team
out there, Right, I mean notbigger per se, but we were
having a lot of people asked tobe on our team you know, and we,
we do do real estatedifferently.
It's very about the people, it'svery about our clients and we
kind of have a different edge tothe way we do things.
(22:07):
So I think it started to getattention.
And it's hard for me.
I'm like, oh, I'll help them,let's bring them on, let's bring
them on.
And our team grew and grew andit was a blessing to be able to
have so many people.
But what happened is justfinancially, as from a business
standpoint, bigger isn't alwaysbetter.
When bigger grew, then biggerexpenses grew, then bigger
(22:28):
responsibilities grew, thenbigger overhead grew.
And for me, you see all thesebig teams or you see these
influencers, or you see allthese people, especially on
social media, where it lookslike bigger is better, and for
me, I want to tell you bigger isnot better.
So, like, what's happened is, Ifeel like we climbed and we
climbed and we climbed and I gotto the top and it was like
that's kind of what happenedwhen my dad died.
I feel like we were doing allthe things and we were growing.
(22:48):
Like right before, probably ayear before my dad died, I went.
I feel like I'm at the top,where I can taste the top, I can
see where these people are andit's like up here it sucks.
It's way better when you'reback to the root of why you do
things More money, more problems.
It is like there's more overhead, like I was making the most
money I've ever made, but I wastaking home the least because I
(23:09):
had to pay for everybody and Ihad to do everything and I was
to grow.
Your name costs money andbranding and and this and that,
and to keep all your clientshappy and coming in.
It's like it costs money togrow.
So it's like funny.
I feel like I've gone the otherway.
Now it's like scaling down.
I want to go back to why I gotinto this.
And it was for the people andthe clients and I actually we
talk about this a lot I love thedeal.
(23:29):
I don't love the big team, Idon't love managing people all
the time.
I just love helping people inthe deal, you know.
So I feel like as we're scalingdown, it's probably like you're
shedding your skin, like itjust changes.
So now I feel like we're backto the root of like how I
started and I am super happy, soI didn't have to quit.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
More relationship focused, thus business focused.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
Yeah, totally, and more like what's in front of me
instead of the big picture.
Yeah, so in real estate it'shard to run a business and take
care of your clients, so youkind of go into two lanes.
So now I feel like we're justtaking care of our clients.
Running the business is inGod's hands.
Yeah, hope that works.
I guess we'll see it's goinggreat, yeah, but yeah, it's
(24:21):
funny because weeks ago it'slike it's I, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
You know what I mean.
Yeah, it's like who cares, likewe're making a difference to
help people.
You know, and like that isreally what you care about you
know, and I like the list.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
Totally.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
I'm just.
I don't know why I'm not likethat.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
I wish I was wired more.
I know I want to not be wiredlike that.
I'm like am I a loser that I'mnot more like no, I think it's
just a validation that like,yeah, in our business it's so
numbers based, which our numbersare really good, right, but
it's like it's just a pissingcontest.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
It's so much, I think in any business right Like
there's levels, lot of affairsBecause there was a lot of happy
hours and then with drinkingcomes canoodling and like all
that fake business stuff.
Speaker 2 (25:02):
I'm not doing a happy hour with anybody.
We don't do any of that.
Speaker 1 (25:04):
No, nothing, no, we just jerk around.
Anyways, speaking ofinfluencers, key documentary
this weekend with Kyle, and shewas a YouTube star that started
recording her family Right Yearsand years ago.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
They were like married With five kids.
Yeah, In Utah.
They're Mormon right In Utah.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
Oh, sorry, I didn't get your messages no.
Yeah, they're just people inUtah.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
People in Utah.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
Might have had different beliefs, and they were
.
She had six kids, yeah, so theywere eight passengers.
Was their YouTube handle whenit was all about their family,
right?
So they would video theirfamily and it was really fun at
first and then it became likethe business.
So it showed like behind thescenes videos that they got from
her yeah, you know she's injail and it showed her like now,
smile, and then it would belike live, and then the kids
(25:57):
would all be laughing and itwould show the camera like when
she put it down, and it would belike like Muffy, like it was
like crazy.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
It's weird that Kyle watched it with you and then
he's like I feel like it's likeTisha like yelling at her kids.
Not say that, not the recordingpart, but just the yelling like
he said that I think he wasbeing funny, you know, because
I'm always yelling at my kids,you know it's like so funny,
yeah, like very smiling.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Yeah, we're going to Disneyland, and if you don't
want to, be, happy at Disneyland.
But that part was likerelatable.
So I was like, okay, am I goingto jail because like yeah, I'm
all well, it's your competition.
Speaker 2 (26:31):
Ken won't take a picture of me.
I'm like I pay millions ofdollars.
You better take your pictureright now or you're not.
You're kicked off, like youknow.
I get crazy.
It's fine, you know.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Yeah.
So I'm like am I going to go tojail?
You know, like Ruby Frankie iskind of relatable, so the
beginning was all relatable andher husband was like I.
His perspective was actuallyreally interesting for a man.
He was like a dork, yeah.
And he was like validation,yeah, that he wasn't a dork.
(27:04):
He was very fit, like oh, hewas getting like yes, and he was
like I was getting fulfilled bylike finally making it, you
know, and um.
So they grew into this bigfamily but it's crazy, the kids
didn't want a video anymore.
They said their whole life.
It was like the Ted, what'sthat show?
The Truman Show or something.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Oh yeah, where it's all video.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
Video and they're like our house became a set.
Yeah, our vacations became aset.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
Well, I follow some people on Instagram and I'm like
thinking I'm like these poorkids, oh, so many people on
Instagram and Facebook andYouTube and it's 24 7 and you
can tell the kids are likelooking at the camera and
they're like, do you like thattoy?
Swipe up.
And I'm like the kid isn't likethe toy, you know, but it's
crazy.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
I know and this is our generation.
Yeah, like, this is real, Iknow, and sometimes I fall for
it.
We text um.
Tisha and I and mysister-in-law we text about
things in Instagram.
Yeah, and sometimes we're likeooh, look at this.
And they're like do you picturethat?
They have a tripod set up?
And it's funny, because we'reso like elementary and I don't
think about that.
Yeah, like when you're watchingit, you think, oh, that looks
(28:07):
so cool.
Speaker 2 (28:08):
Like there's a fly on the wall.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
But it's like it's so funny I fall right.
It would be someone you wouldhate.
So she wakes up at 5 o'clockevery day and works out.
She has four kids.
I hate those people.
She does her reading everymorning, oh you would hate her.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
It's so cute.
Speaker 1 (28:31):
And I'm eating it every day.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
I'm like I'm going to wake up at 5 o'clock oh like
eat blueberries in my oatmealevery day.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
Yes, it's like bed, it's all of it.
I'm like, oh my God, it's soboring.
She makes sourdough everymorning.
I'm asleep.
She has four boys.
She's having a fifth boy andshe said Mama, four boys Every
day.
It's the Mama, the designer,and she's a Christian and it's
like I'm having Brooke.
I'm like I'm going to startdoing what Brooke's doing.
(29:01):
Yeah, I'm never doing that.
Oh, I'm doing all of Brooke'sthings.
She puts red lipstick on everyday.
I might start putting redlipstick on every day.
She like made this.
It's like so someone you'd hate.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
She made like a book with like laminated pages for
her Disney World trip, yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
And then was selling the book on how they do Disney
and I hate Disney and I was like, should I get the book, like
Brooke?
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
I should make a book on how to wipe you know I fell
right into it.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
I know, but now, when you picture the tripod, you're
like you're right.
Yeah, you know, it's not thesame.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
But I can't stop watching.
Nothing is just what it seems.
I make sourdough, then I wantto record things and because I'm
like, oh, I should do this, andmy kids are like so
uncooperative, they're like god,mom, like, like, or I'm like I
smiled, like don't post it, likeit's so crazy.
I know they hate like anything.
I could never be like anInstagram star, right, and
that's the fact that, like noone's watching, but yeah no, but
like it starts with no onewatching.
Yeah, no, my, my kids are souncooperative.
And then, ben, I'm, I'll take apicture of me and it's all the
(30:04):
worst angle.
You know, like the husbands areso recording and they're, like
Brooke's, always taking apicture of the red lipstick yeah
, and they're watching, or likethe husband's recording the wife
and she's like holding the kidsout.
I'm'm all get a picture of mecarrying.
You know it's like the worstangle.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
He's horrible, I know , but what the weirdest thing is
with so many of these people,brooke Ray, I can't read the
word r-a-w wait, r-a-y-b-o-u-l-d, raybould I don't know how'd
you get Brooke Burke from that.
I don't know, isn't she acelebrity?
Speaker 2 (30:34):
yeah, she used to be on my.
Watch her stomach, I know, doyou get?
Speaker 1 (30:37):
that like ad.
So Kyle is next to me the otherday.
And the ad for Brooke.
He goes every day and I likestarted doing sit-ups.
Her ad.
Have you seen Brooke?
She's like in her underwear,yeah, it's the best.
So Kyle's next to me and I'msliding through Instagram.
He goes who is that?
What is that?
And I'm like it's an ad andhe's like who's that girl?
(30:57):
And it's like her side.
I've never seen she's in likeunderwear?
Speaker 2 (31:00):
yes, but it's like, I see it every day, it's like the
best body.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Yeah, it is it's every day they're moving.
Look mama, for boys.
You see her.
They're in matching outfits.
We're not finding out thegender of the baby in spandex oh
my god yeah, and she wakes upat five every day.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
Mama wait this is the real reason why moms are so
tired.
Did you know moms make over 200decisions a day.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
Yeah, and she has a whiteboard in her house.
I'm like I need to get awhiteboard in my house.
I know you totally are likedoing all those things yeah to
four boys.
Speaker 2 (31:33):
This is our husband wife 5 am morning routine.
Speaker 1 (31:36):
10 years into parenting, we've developed a
10-step morning routine that'stransformed both our marriage
and the way we parent.
Every time I'm like writingthose steps down.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
See, this is annoying , though, because let me tell
you why it's annoying.
First, it's annoying becausepeople are making money.
She's making money off peopletrying to make their mornings
better yeah, but, like they'reprobably more stressed out
because they can't master this10 steps.
And she homeschools, yeah, andyou're just making her money.
And it's dumb, oh, and shetakes cold showers.
She probably doesn't even dothat.
She probably just records itonce and then sells it and
(32:05):
people are buying it and they'reall stressed out trying to do
the morning.
Oh, I have been stressed out.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
If someone recorded my morning, it's all it's all tj
yells at me is my heating padhot, you know?
And then it's all him puttingthe heating back.
I'm a mama for a kid sitting onthe couch, I'm a mama for, and
I'm all and I'm all you know.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
I'm like reading my devotional scrolling.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
I love that about you though because I always fall
into this crap.
I'm not always fall into it andI'm like always the
overachiever personality yeah,and Tisha's like not, no, and
she's like I'm not doing thatand like you're still very
productive in life.
I'm so productive, yeah, andyou're not doing any of it no,
she waits, I'm gonna make, I'mgonna make a guide for.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
Now she has a bedding company yeah.
Oh yeah, like bedding a bag.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Yeah, yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, her and her husband.
He's a lawyer, they're movingto Texas.
They're doing it yeah, oh yeah.
And she meets on Sunday nights.
I don't even want to tell youthey have a family planning
meeting, oh yeah, with herhusband, and then they type up
the agenda of the week.
Their kids must want to justlike run away.
I know it does kind of lookfunny, it's too much.
(33:16):
Yeah, Disneyland was stressful.
She had red lipstick on everyday, though.
Yeah, it's not fun.
Speaker 2 (33:19):
Yeah, she had her outfits planned oh my gosh, mine
it guide.
Like marry a husband that makesyour coffee and does the
laundry.
And then, like, wake up incities, cities, yeah, cities for
minimum 45 minutes.
Isn't that long?
It's like 30, yeah, but likethey know, don't talk to me, I'm
not doing it like I'm doing mycoffee.
Speaker 1 (33:40):
It's not my fault, you didn't do your homework last
night exactly I'm not gonna bein a rush and miss my cities.
She wakes up at 5 am, she worksout, she runs two miles a day
and does 20 minutes of strengthtraining every single day.
Then she takes a cold showerand gets dressed for the day.
She believes that gettingdressed like fully cute outfit
every single day makes her feelmore productive and I can see
that for some people.
So I'm all trying to get in thecold shower.
Speaker 2 (34:03):
I keep feeling it.
And if you're not that type Apersonality, like if I tried to
do that, I would be so stressedout, miserable, because and I'd
be setting myself up for failurebecause it's not like something
I'm good at, yeah, so for me,I'm like get a hike in today, it
doesn't matter.
If it's 5 o'clock, I don't needto wake up.
I'm never waking up at 5 am.
No, so I o'clock.
(34:32):
It might be you know you hike alot of days, but I'm hiking all
the time.
Exactly, you get it in thereand you get it in.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
That's great for a type a personality but, like
there needs to be, you can stillbe successful and be a type b.
You know, and I wouldn't sayyou're a type b at work at all,
no, I'm very type a than me.
Speaker 2 (34:38):
Yeah, I get back to people right away, but there's
things I'm not doing.
Speaker 1 (34:41):
But how many people watch Brooke rebuild and feel
less than that's?
Speaker 2 (34:45):
what I'm saying, cause you're not doing that and
you don't need Disneyland withthe color coded or whatever.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
Oh, and the outfits, no and all of those Disney
outfits, you know, I know.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
I hate a matching outfit.
It's so expensive and.
Speaker 1 (34:56):
I'm like they're always shopping at like Sprouts
together as a family and I'mlike we should drop a Sprouts
together as a family.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
I store.
No, I'm never going to thegrocery store.
I'm overpaying instacart, oh mygod.
Speaker 1 (35:10):
I'm tipping $80.
It's outrageous.
I do that too, and last nightwe went to go get um my niece's
birthday today, so we went lateto go get her something yeah, I
went, and Hudson goes 6 am thisis mortifying.
My daughter goes.
This is my second time everI've been in fries ever, ever,
really.
That she can remember?
Yeah, because we didn't haveinstacart when we were little.
We took them all the time.
They always went groceryshopping with me.
I remember having all mine onthe cart.
Speaker 2 (35:30):
Yeah, what's happening?
This is awful.
Oh, is it bad that last nightKen told me I need to bring the
gift and so I was on instacartat 10 o'clock last night and I
was gonna instacart it, but it's.
They don't do good at pickingout balloons and flowers, so I
had to go this morning.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
Yeah, anyways yeah no , I do feel like the, so I
watched that one.
I forgot her name now BrookeRay, something.
No, the one.
Ruby Frank.
Okay, so Ruby Frank.
So what happened with Ruby?
Let me do it.
Oh, yeah, yeah, they startedfollowing this influencer Back
then.
It wasn't even an influencer,it was crazy.
(36:03):
She's a therapist.
It was Hillebrand.
Her name was Hillebrand,something, hillebrand.
She was single.
This is what drives me nuts,like why do people follow
marriage advice for someone thatisn't even?
I don't even know if she everhad been married, right, like
she doesn't know.
No, and her kids?
Yeah, she's estranged from herkids.
Yeah, why are we listening?
(36:24):
She lived alone in this um likeSedona in Utah, where we
stopped, where we stopped in forthe.
The oh, st George in St Georgein the middle of nowhere is
where she lives.
So I'm like she lives in themiddle of nowhere by herself,
but she is a marriage and familyperson, but none of her kids
(36:45):
are with her right, I don'tthink they were that old.
Speaker 2 (36:47):
Yeah, that's what we call a red flag.
Yes, yeah, like giant red flag.
Speaker 1 (36:51):
Yeah then she has these men in these groups.
They're in these facetimegroups talking about sexual
impurity and she's yelling atthem that they're lustful and
that they want to do weirdthings to their wife.
It was like, oh god he wants todo all the things.
Men are like feeling bad.
They want to do these thingsand she's all.
(37:12):
You're lusting, your wife andI'm all.
Isn't that what like is good?
Like, aren't you supposed to.
Speaker 2 (37:18):
I'm at your house.
You should be like sprayingholy water all over that bitch
but like that's normal, isn't it?
Speaker 1 (37:28):
it is normal, like it was weird.
She's like you gotta do allthis, oh my gosh so this lady's
an idiot.
Speaker 2 (37:34):
And why are men listening to a woman?
Sorry, that's stupid.
Oh, like a guy shouldn't listento a woman's advice about sex
yeah, no, yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
So they're all in this group every week.
I'm like these men, these menso demasculating, so this girl.
Speaker 2 (37:48):
Yeah, her husband sounds like a little bitch Whose
Ruby's.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
Yeah, he was.
Yeah, I could tell it getsreally bad.
So okay, so Hill and Brand,they take over this lady.
Her son started acting up thisis so sad because he was sick of
being on camera.
Yeah, so he started acting up.
He got kicked out of school.
Ruby's crying on the thing.
My son got kicked out of school, which I was like wow, I
wouldn't tell anybody, I'd belike there he is going to school
and put back in his room rightlike brooke raybilled or
(38:19):
whatever.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
Maybe that's why your kids are homeschooled.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
They all got kicked out, yeah, but it's looking
perfect.
Speaker 2 (38:23):
Yeah, exactly you know.
Speaker 1 (38:24):
So I'm like, wow, she's telling him she's crying.
He got kicked out.
So then he started doing weeklytherapy with this lady, so he
now like loves her it gets soweird to you.
Speaker 2 (38:35):
Yeah, she like brainwashed these people.
So then it's so.
I can't stand when people getbrainwashed by people.
It drives me nuts.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
It's in these conferences called connections
with an ex, and then they like,do all these talks and and what
happened is jody, is that hername?
What's the lady?
Ruby, ruby, I'm thinking jody,areas, you're like talking about
now jody areas.
That's horrible.
It turns, I'm telling you.
It turns.
Ruby kyle keeps calling me rubyat home too, like when I'm
yelling he's like Ruby and I'mlike, yes, awful, so, okay.
(39:10):
So the Hillenbrand lady nowthey're all doing these
connections, now they'respeakers for connections.
She took her son's bed away forseven months.
He had to sleep in the basementon a bean bag.
This is when things start toturn.
Yeah, that's weird.
Because he's being selfish, andthe selfish is from the devil,
right, yeah, so she's startingto like really lay it down.
Speaker 2 (39:30):
Spiral.
Speaker 1 (39:31):
So they were like a normal family, with the yelling
and everything.
Yeah, that was all normal.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
So the lady is like culty, right?
Yes, so she's telling him thatit's the devil.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
Yes, yeah, you know, we got to get the kids to mind.
And then the kids said yeah, Islept on a beanbag for seven
months.
So YouTube lights her up, whichthey should Totally, you know.
They light her up and saidyou're abusing this kid blah
blah blah.
Speaker 2 (39:54):
Yeah, why wasn't CPS?
Speaker 1 (39:55):
called.
Oh, CPS was called like 10times on these kids.
And they didn't do anythingbecause there was no evidence of
abuse.
Once it turns, let me tell youabuse.
Once it turns, let me tell you,yeah, yeah, I don't know if
anybody cares, but I did careabout the documentary, so, ruby.
So then she starts like being aspeaker on like because Helen
Brand and the lady is not cute,not saying that, people only
follow cute people because Ionly follow cute people, oh my
(40:20):
god, she says that a lot.
I don't but Brooke does have thered lipstick and she's very
pretty.
Yeah, brooke Raybould, orwhatever bald.
Yeah, I don't know how to saythat word.
Yeah, anyways.
So the Helen Brand is not cuteand it's weird.
I can't believe the followingbecause I'm not seeing it.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
So anyway, yeah, like why aren't people following us
and they're following her.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
So the Helen Brand is in the Red Rocks or whatever
what's it called In Utah, likeshe's having like satanic things
where she like is seeing weirdthings around her house.
Speaker 2 (40:48):
Oh, like paranormal activity.
I read that yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, no, it's the devil, yeah.
Speaker 1 (40:53):
Yeah, so it gets weird.
So she's like he's here.
Speaker 2 (40:56):
So is she making it up?
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
So the whole family of the eight passengers goes out
to the house and they're likethere's too many weird things.
She's she's got to come livewith us so she moves in.
This is like black.
That's when things get weird.
So now at night she's havingthese.
In her night she's having theseterrors and there's videos of
her like, like in tongues andit's bad.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
I shouldn't laugh.
This is horrible that thishappened to these kids.
So in the middle of the nightit's happening.
We can't make that a clip?
Speaker 1 (41:22):
So now, Ruby goes and has to sleep in her room with
Hillenbrand because she has tohelp keep the people away.
Speaker 2 (41:30):
This is reminding me of that stupid kid.
Do you remember that onekidnapped in plain sight?
Yes, that's what it's like whenI'm like these people are
idiots.
Speaker 1 (41:38):
That's exactly what it's like, and it's all
happening slow, like the frogeffect, yes, and they're not
realizing this woman is ruiningyour life.
So now the kids are gettingpunished all the time because
Hillenbrand's living there.
So now the wife is in the bedwith the Hillenbrand and the
daughter the oldest daughter isstarting to see things are going
weird.
Yeah, and sees like massageoils on the thing and like all
this weird stuff by the bed.
Speaker 2 (41:57):
So they're having like a three.
Speaker 1 (41:59):
No, not with the daughter.
Speaker 2 (42:01):
No, the husband in the white.
Speaker 1 (42:01):
No, the husband's in his own bed, oh shoot.
She's with the Hillenbrand, ohshoot.
So then they decide that thehusband, that they need space,
they kick the husband out andthey kick the son out, the son
that fixed his life.
Yeah, and they're not allowed totalk to each other or the
family, yeah, cause that'snormal For one year, one year
they don't talk and the and thehusband just leaves Cause he's
thinking that Hillenbrand, he'snot being godly and he needs to
(42:25):
give separation for a year.
While they're out of the house,the abuse starts with the kids.
They think the two kids aresatanically possessed oh my gosh
.
So they lock him in a room withno food or water.
The kid had duct tape around hisankles, hadn't eaten in weeks.
They were like cutting him,like physically to get the
demons out, or whatever.
(42:45):
The journal entries she had hadshe's fully saying what's
happening.
They're possessed.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
The kid ran do you think she really believed that?
She believed it because of thislady.
It's weird.
It's like how are people thatsusceptible?
Speaker 1 (42:57):
and they're like so the dad was not around because
he was not allowed to talk andthe son wasn't allowed to talk,
and so then the kid ran to theneighbor's house.
That's what you can see, thevideo where the kid goes to the
neighbor.
Yeah, he's the one that savedhim, right?
Yeah, and then the kid ran tothe neighbor's house.
That's what you can see.
The video where the kid goes tothe neighbor yeah, he's the one
that saved him, right?
Yeah?
And then the dad gets calledand the wife Jodi, or whatever
her name is, what's her name?
Ruby Ruby calls the husband andis like the kid is telling the
(43:18):
police bad things about me.
He's saying I did all thesethings You've got to go get him.
And he's he feels horrible.
Now he's like I can't believe Ifell for all this.
Yeah, my kids were being abusedand I left them there and
didn't call them because theytold me not to call for a year.
So then she goes to jail.
They both plead guilty, her andHillenbrand, and and I don't
(43:38):
know if the kids are back withthe dad, but the oldest daughter
, who knew what was going on?
She calls him Ruby and his name.
Yeah, like I don't think theyhave a relationship but like
pretty normal family went Southall from Instagram and Hill and
bread and YouTube.
Speaker 2 (43:51):
It's weird Cause I feel I don't like to judge
because I don't want, cause younever.
well, I sometimes judge, but umyou never know when you try not
to judge, yeah, but I try not to, because you never know when
something can happen to you.
But I feel pretty confidentsaying like I would never be
susceptible to like followingsomeone like that.
That's so weird.
(44:11):
But there are so many people.
I've always said like I feellike God created.
We're created in God's image.
You know.
God created us.
We're supposed to work.
We're created to worship him.
So I feel like if you're notworshiping him, you're very
susceptible to following andworshiping someone else.
And there's so many whackedpeople out there that people are
(44:32):
following and listening to andthey're miserable.
Like it's weird.
Like we were talking about DaveHollis, which I'm sure he's
really nice, but he was like amotivational, but then he was
like he died of like addictionand yeah.
But I'm saying like people are.
People are making these choicesand following this person Based
on false pretenses, right, andpeople are sinful in nature.
(44:52):
Like people make mistakes.
You can't put somebody on apedestal.
Only God you know.
But it's just weird.
Speaker 1 (44:58):
I'm like Well, I agree, I don't think we're ever
supposed to put any other idolsbesides him, but it's crazy.
That's what bothers me aboutsocial media and influencers,
and that's what we try to not betotally.
We say way too much on herebecause we're trying to so be
without like the guard yeah, wedon't have anything figured out,
we don't have anything figuredout.
we say it, that's our wholeintro.
(45:19):
Yeah is like we're.
We're a mess, just like you,and maybe you're not a mess, but
we really don't want to.
We want more people to knowthat all the things that are
going through are real Right,because I think more people are
like us than like Brooke Rebuildor whatever her name is Right.
I do want the red lipstick, butit would look weird on me.
Yeah, like every day, every day.
So at Disneyland she went tothe store to get the red
(45:39):
lipstick and I was like, shouldI go to CVS?
To the phone.
Speaker 2 (45:43):
I know.
Speaker 1 (45:44):
We're literally brainwashed, even with flights,
like we're being brainwashed tobe scared of these things and
we're being brainwashed to tobelieve these things.
Like it's crazy what the phonesthat's what church was about
this week was anxiety and howwe're anxious because we're on
screens and we're listening toeverything around us and it's
making us anxious and we're notlike following peace, which we
(46:04):
were going to talk about today.
Speaker 2 (46:05):
But we can talk about everything else.
Do we have time?
No, I sent.
I sent on our group chat.
This morning we have a familygroup chat and I sent this thing
that I saw on Instagram.
I like screenshot it.
It was like you wouldn't watcha movie of someone sitting there
on their phone all day.
So like, don't have that beyour life.
Speaker 1 (46:33):
Go out there and be like the main character, like go
live.
It was like cute the way it wasworded, like no one's watching
a movie of me gambling.
Yes, yeah, so get off and golive, you know, and be a main
character in your own life.
Well, that's what kyle was likeelbowing me, usually at church
I'm elbowing him, yeah.
And this week it was likeyou're on screens.
It like walked through people'sdays, right, like how everyone
wakes up and then they checktheir screens and then the news
tells us all these things arewrong with the world and you
start your day like that andthen, you're yelling at your
kids and you send them off, thenyou go to work and get yelled
at by bad leaders that aren'tpositive.
And then you go home and thenyou're on your screens and
(46:55):
you're cooking dinner and thenyou get in bed and then you want
to be alone Because that's likeone of my big things is instead
of choosing peace and choosingto, and he's like your kids
don't need social media.
You don't need social media.
You don't need to be slave tothose things.
Speaker 2 (47:12):
Yeah, I saw it said like something we missed it
because we had a baseballtournament and then we had the
cheer competition, so we missedthis weekend, but we're gonna
watch it.
But I saw like a recap onInstagram and it said something
yeah, like we're so obsessedwith like being successful on
social media and getting thelikes and all that, that there's
no peace, no peace.
And it's like it's really sadfor our kids.
Speaker 1 (47:34):
I think all of us have a lot of pressure.
Yeah, like I just talked about,I had all this pressure on me
as a leader.
Pressure, you know, because Isee other teams or other
realtors doing this and that andI feel like I should do that
Right.
And it's like our kids are inthat, you know, because they are
on social media.
They see all these things.
We drove around to go get thisstupid Dubai chocolate yesterday
(47:54):
from Zupas.
Speaker 2 (47:55):
Oh, the Zupas Because it's trending on TikTok.
Speaker 1 (47:58):
But I don't know.
I think all that's fine.
I don't think I'm not at aplace where I'm going to take my
kids off of social media yet,but I do think I keep them, try
to keep them pretty busy so theydon't have a lot of time to be
on it, but I don't know ifthat's right either, um, but I
think peace and like slowingdown and not.
I think the biggest thing is Isee a lot of influencers and we
(48:18):
see a lot of people in our lives, too that look perfect on
Instagram and then you get toknow them in person and you're
like Whoa, what I was seeing andwhat's happening is so
different.
Not always bad too, it's justdifferent than what it's
perceived.
But I'll see couples on therethat look like the happiest
couples in the world and thenext week they moved out and
it's like you don't understandthe story, right, like what
happened.
How did you go from a to b?
(48:39):
Right?
Speaker 2 (48:39):
because they weren't posting that.
It was like yeah, it's gettingbad.
You know how would you postthat, though?
Speaker 1 (48:44):
like I can't stand my husband today yeah and I do
think that's normal.
Like again, that's somethingthat people don't talk about is
like you're not going to feelgood about yourself every day.
We talked about that last week,the struggles of trying to be
healthy and fit and and do right, but you're not going to love
your husband.
You love your husband every day, but you don't like him all the
time.
Yeah, that's normal.
I don't like myself all the time, right, right, I like you most
(49:05):
of the time, though that's weird, I know it's a little bit
different.
But like even your kids, I knowYou'll feel like a good mom one
day and you'll feel like theworst mom the next day.
And I'll feel like a goodrealtor and then I'll feel like
the worst realtor.
Then I'll feel like I'll begood with money.
(49:31):
Then, all of a sudden, I putsomething on the credit card and
I'm out of control again.
I think it's just like givingeach other grace to be more
honest about these things.
That's what I love about ourfriendship is it's always the
truth.
Yeah, and I think a lot ofpeople don't maybe have real
people in their life that tellthem you know, I was yelling at
my kids all night and I feel bad, yeah.
So then they feel like okay,yeah, so then they feel like
okay, I've done that too.
You know that's what we'retrying to be here, jerking
around.
Yeah, so we'll be your friend,me too, our own, me too.
Movement, yeah, yeah, I yelltoo that's crazy, though, about
(49:53):
Ruby Frank.
Speaker 2 (49:54):
I just cannot believe that someone actually let
someone like move in and do allthat.
Speaker 1 (49:58):
It's so crazy it's so crazy and the dad is like a
good man.
They were a good family.
But I think it's like anothertestament to like be careful
what you let in your life, inall areas oh, you have to be so
protective.
Speaker 2 (50:10):
I'm very protective.
I feel like of my you know Icould be better.
Speaker 1 (50:14):
You've gotten better yeah, everybody, I'm like I love
you no, it's great, though it'sgood to be loving no.
I can be more loving we couldbe we help each other.
Speaker 2 (50:22):
Be more the other way , yeah, but no, I do think you
have to be protective of what?
Because you just, and even whatyou're doing, you know.
Speaker 1 (50:31):
Well, with 75 Hard, I took out a lot of things in my
life.
Like I stopped watching realityTV, I was careful what I
listened to.
We don't realize what we'reputting in our bodies.
Speaker 2 (50:39):
Yeah, just like Garbage in, garbage out.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (50:42):
Like all those things .
But I things, but I haven'tgotten off social media yet, I
don't really watch it that much.
But I do do other weird thingslike play casino games on my
phone yeah, that's fine.
I don't know if it's fine.
Anyways, we'll see you nextweek, guys, have a good week.
Have a good week.
Welcome to jerking around apodcast that makes you feel
better about yourself, becausewe're a mess just like you, and
(51:03):
crystal makes fun of me and it's.
And it's great and it's real.
Welcome to Jerking Around, a podcast that makes you
feel better about yourself,because we're a mess just like
you, and Crystal makes fun of methe whole time and it's great
and it's real.
Welcome to Jerking Around.
(00:25):
Welcome.
Tisha's having an attitudeproblem today.
She's in mourning.
I'm just going to drink yourwater.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
I'm just getting a drink, I'm trying to hydrate,
you know.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
Yeah, so when she's dark like this, it means she's
going to say something reallyinappropriate.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Something nasty.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
Your nail, though you've got to stop.
No, it's fine.
She does this thing where shelifts her nail like a nervous
condition.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
It's like a nervous.
Well, I used to bite my nails,so now I have like the hard gel,
which I love, the hard gel.
But now I pick at my nail likeI lift them and I just do weird
things, so she's killing it.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
So now it's like a nub and she's trying to hide it
from me.
Well, no, it's not a nub.
The hard gel came off.
It looks nub like it's verysmall.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
It's a little nubby Well she filed it down to even
it and then it was too short.
When it first fell off, it wasfine, if you keep lifting from
here.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
I think we're going to have the brain back.
We used to in high schoolbecause it had tentacles no
she'd suck on her fingers no,weird, I didn't.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
She does that still, if you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
No, oh yeah, I would bite my nails and like my finger
would get waterlogged from,like, and it would look kind of
brainy.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
It wasn't, yeah yeah don't recommend.
I know my kids bite their nails, some of them CJ does, yeah,
and I'm always like don't biteyour nails.
And his nails are so low I'mlike oh it, it looks like it
hurts.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
I don't mess with my nails.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
I'm like don't do it.
And then when he's doing it,he's like but I used to do that.
Yeah, I was like you need acleanse like a pair, you know,
like a parasite, cleanse CauseI've heard that that's like a
part.
You know, ticks and differentnervous behaviors are part of if
you have parasites.
Great, there's Bytisha.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Yeah, it's great, we're really doing it.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
If you're a nail biter, try a parasite cleanse,
just saving the world, oneparasite at a time.
Where do you get a parasitecleanse?
There's different things youcan do.
There's all different.
Like at the grocery store.
No, I think you have to orderthem yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
Yeah, like at the grocery store.
No, I think you have to orderthem.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Yeah, yeah, it's herbs, melissa knows.
Yeah, melissa's into it.
So have you done one?
No, but I want to.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Well, get going.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
I know.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Why not?
Speaker 2 (02:31):
I know I should.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
Get one today and then tell us about it next week.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
All right, see you later.
Guys, I'm going to get you know.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
So our week?
Nothing exciting like last week.
We had a cheer competitionShocking this weekend.
The girls did really well Lotsof metal detectors everywhere.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Yeah, it was a different vibe.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
Lots of police From the nacho fight.
It really turned things around.
I felt safe, though I felt safetoo.
I felt way better.
Yeah, the metal detectors, theyvery much checked everyone.
Yeah, you had that one checkwhere they took you in the back
room yeah, and you loved it.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
The strip search yeah , they were like, yeah, now body
cavity check, you know, and Iwas like, oh well, it's been a
while.
So I'm just kidding, and ithasn't been a while.
Wish it had been a while kindof Cavities are to the back, no
cavities in there, yeah, bothholes.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
so which one has it been a while?
Speaker 2 (03:22):
no, that one's been.
Never the the normal has been a.
It's been a while.
No, it hasn't been a while.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
I wish it'd been a while this is getting, I feel,
really upset.
Yeah, so, anyways.
So you've been doing it.
A lot is what you want to talkabout.
I mean, when you come back fromout of town, does he really
want to catch?
No, but you said, kyle did yeah, and I was like I'm not ready
to catch up.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
Well, that was like a traumatic comeback.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Yeah, I was like I told you, I got back and I was
like feeling wounded and I gotin bed that night and I was
thinking, oh poor me, I'm scared.
And you know what's kind ofweird, when I was followed in
Vegas, yeah, I was just gonnasay whenever the same thing
(04:07):
happened, yeah, I got in bed allscared it's and I like cuddled
up and then I just been followedby these like five random
almost taken almost taken.
I don't feel like doing itafter that yeah, but he thinks
it's the green light.
It's a little like what's goingon.
I think it's the cuddle.
Do you ever not want to cuddle?
Because you know that's what'sgonna happen all the time.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
Yeah, yeah, I'll play dead.
He's like cuddling and I justlay there and he's like geez and
I'm like well, no, because thenyou're going to take it as a
green light.
Yeah and no, it's not a greenlight.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
It's like frustrating because I don't mind a cuddle.
I'm like he'll rub my back andI like that part yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
But I'm not always ready for the whole thing.
Right, trying to give the wrongsignal.
Sometimes I feel like if Icuddle or sometimes if I just my
feet are cold, I'll put them onhim.
He thinks that's the go.
He thinks it's the go and I'mlike, no, I'm just I have cold
feet.
So I have to say, hey, can youget my heating pad?
Because then I'm by myself.
You know, because if I'mrubbing up on him, then he
(04:58):
thinks that it's like the green.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
I know I wonder if that's a problem in many
marriages.
Like you, stop cuddling.
The other night he was likecome after I got home from being
traumatized, try to go to bed.
It happened.
And he has this thing where ifI say no or if I'm like, nah, I
do that too.
It's like the biggest challengeand it's happening.
So I don't know.
I got to switch that up Cause Iwas like, and then he's like oh
, I'll get that no to a yes.
(05:22):
Yeah, you know, it's not likeinappropriate or anything, it's
a yes before it happens, but ifhe rubs me more than 10 minutes,
it's a green light for sure.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
Yeah, because I like am so grateful.
Oh, my oh.
I've done hours rubbing.
I'm all good night.
Are you serious Hours?
Yeah, like two shows.
Speaker 1 (05:42):
He rubs you the whole show.
Yeah, he's rubbed the whole,but is he trying and you say no?
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Well, he doesn't have a choice, because I throw my
leg over and he'll like rub myknee or my leg.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Like Kyle just starts , I'm not like saying no after
that.
Is he like trying to make ithappen and you say no, or he
doesn't try.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Well, again, it's like the signal, so like if he's
rubbing my knee and my leg,then he'll like try to like Rub
up it.
It'll kind of try to drift.
And then if I'm like lettingthe drift happen, and sometimes
I'll like reposition the drift,you know, and then I'm like, and
like my leg was sprawled overon him and then he was rubbing
my knee and it was fine, andthen all of a sudden he tries.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
And then I like throw my leg back on my side and then
he gets.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
He gets the like the drift or he gets like subtle
messages.
Yes, he knows if you close yourleg.
Speaker 1 (06:34):
It's no, it's a no.
Or if I have to be rejected,yes, yeah, because I'm not gonna
be like no if he starts likereally going yeah, I'm not gonna
be mean, you know, yeah that'sthe thing like.
If once it like goes to acertain point, you can't say no
it you can't say no, it'd beawkward yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Except I feel like the other day yesterday, our
house cleaner was coming and hewas like, what do you mean by
coming?
She was coming, she gets thereat like nine and so it's a small
window from the school drop offto the.
What if she's early, exactly,and she just comes in our house?
So it's not like A knock or adoorbell.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Right.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
So I got home from dropping the kids off and then
he was wanting to, you know,play and I was like, oh, no
Josie's coming.
And he was like thinking it was.
So what happened?
Let's make it quick.
And I was like no Josie'scoming, so we didn't do it
sounds so wrong.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
I know it does.
It's kind of it was a no, butit wasn't like he was touching
you.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Oh yeah, no, he was trying and I was like no, get
the heck off me.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
It wasn't like there's a certain point where
you can't say no, it'd be sorude, or can you?
I can Like if he's touchingyour private, you'll just be
like no.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
Well, I'll just roll over and get out of there, or
I'll like move his hand, I don'tknow.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
Just it's clear you know, really yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
So do you say the word no or does it just like you
roll over and run?
I'll say like I'm tired or goodnight, or like no ease.
You know, I'll add the IES tobe like not so rude.
Yeah, and you say no ease, yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:03):
And what does he say?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
please ease's.
No, he just like gets it andthen he's kind of irritated.
You know, yeah, yeah, and Isometimes I care if he's
irritated.
Sometimes I'm too tired, Idon't care if he's irritated.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
When I used to watch the Duggars.
I used to love the Duggars Um,things have changed a lot since,
but she was like you never sayno to your husband.
You're the only one in theworld that can give him that
gift.
So anytime he wants it, you gotto be giving that gift.
Yeah, do you believe that?
So I go both ways?
Yeah, I do think you should,because, like my mom said, it
(08:34):
starts in the morning, you earnit in the morning and I like
that.
She always made my dad earn it,but they were like fiends,
fiend like the song.
Yeah, they were always doing it.
But, like for me, sometimeswhat happens is like you get on
that bad path where you'reannoyed by each other and you're
being short with each other.
The last thing I feel likedoing is doing it.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
You gotta just do it, you gotta do it.
So like it's confusing, youknow.
I think it depends.
I think you don't need to maybealways say yes, you, you can
say I'm tired, maybe not in away that it's like withholding
or mean, but just like, oh, I'vebeen like, hey, I'm tired, can
we do it in the morning?
I've said that when I'm notlike, do you follow through?
Yeah, usually Okay.
Where I'm not like denying it'slike you're a loser, I'm just
(09:13):
tired, yeah, I'm not like.
Ah, you know.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
Yeah, like we talk about sex a lot in marriage but
I mean I'm no pro at themarriage thing or the sex thing,
I just go off of what likethey've taught us at church and
Dr Laura, some friends reallybig yeah, some friends have said
they don't say no and it'sgreat, you know friends, yeah,
no, I'm asking.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
I didn't say anyone oh yeah and they're super cute
and I do think it is good.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
But, like with that person, that friend of us and
she does listen, not all thetime, but she is a jerky, the
friend of ours.
They've only been with eachother.
And I always think that whenyou've only been with one person
ladies and young people thatlisten, because we have a lot of
young people don't do it untilyou're married, because it does
bond you better.
Yeah, people don't do it tillyou're married because it does
bond you better.
(10:05):
Yeah, we've been blessed tohave that gift too.
Yes, you know, but I just thinkI think it's the no is
different when, like, you'venever been with a guy that was
using you or didn't make youfeel safe well, that's what I'm
saying.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
If he's being a jerk, I'm not doing it.
Get the heck out of here.
Yeah, those days have passedyeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Yeah, I'm not on the side of the freeway anymore,
exactly, you know.
Yeah, no, I agree, but I feellike for our friend it's like a
lot, it's like three times aweek and she's like you.
Just, you know, I go up thereand I put him to bed and I take
care of him and then I go watchmy shows and he's happy as a
cucumber.
Yeah, because I put him, it'sgood.
Yeah, and I do like that aboutat night because I like to watch
(10:43):
TV and Kyle doesn't, my husband.
So if I do the thing, then Ican watch TV.
Then you get your freedomBecause, like, if he's, if I
don't watch TV, he's like turnit down, turn it down, turn it
down.
Once I do do that, it's likehe's right to sleep, yeah, but
it wakes me up, it's likecaffeine.
Yeah, yeah and it's like always, I always joke with him.
I'm like when I'm almost asleepit's like your favorite, is it
(11:05):
because I don't know?
Just say, I'm like that.
That b words finally shut hermouth.
Oh yeah, like because I'malways young.
And then when I'm almost asleep, I'm like quiet.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
Yeah, I'm like, is that why he's all, finally,
finally just shut her mouth, youknow, and he laughs.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
It's like when I say hike, but um, I feel like he
does think that sometimes,because I get like yeah, I don't
know about you, but and Kylelistens, so I have to be very
careful with how I word it.
But sometimes for me this ishappening to me this weekend.
I don't know if it's becausewe're on a girls' trip, but like
I get used to like my rhythmwithout Kyle, yeah, and I try to
(11:40):
explain this to him Like whenthe kids get ready for the
morning, it's super calm, likethere's not.
I actually don't really likespaz on my kids a lot, like it's
very, very calm.
I don't really have to is, andso I get like you're throwing my
(12:02):
mojo off.
But I'm not trying to underminehim, but I get sometimes where
it's like I just get likeannoyed, you know, yeah, it's
like he'll wake up and he's likechecking for everything and
like this is, this room isn'tclean and this isn't done, and
I'm like whoa, whoa, whoa.
It's Saturday morning.
This is like the first Saturdaywe had where we didn't get up
and out, right, so it was likehe wants to get things done, but
(12:23):
I'm like that's not how we roll.
We roll very calm in themornings.
So I don't know, it's reallyhard, I feel, for people that's
husbands work out of town andcome back.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
That has to be a really hard transition yeah, we
were talking to our friend aboutthat and her husband travels
and she says it's a transitionwhen he comes home because she's
like hold on, we had our wholething and now it's all thrown
off.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Yeah, that's how I feel.
Yeah, like when I'm more, Ifeel like it's because we were
gone and like we've I've.
Just I haven't been around himas much, so it was harder for me
this weekend right, because youwere like nails on a chalkboard
and not him.
It's just like he cares aboutthe things I don't care about,
and that's what makes us work.
But anytime I try to bettermyself.
That's what's hard, I think, inmarriage.
(13:05):
When one person starts reallygrowing and the other one isn't
growing with them, I thinkthat's gotta be really hard.
Yeah, and I feel like I've seenthat happen with couples.
One person really gets healthyor gets sober and then the other
person they divorce.
So I read books in the mornings.
I've talked about it since 75Heart.
I listen to books every morningbecause I try to fuel my brain
(13:27):
before the day takes over andit's something that really helps
me.
So I'm reading.
I told you guys about this book.
I read about how to win.
It's called how to Win Friendsand Influence People.
It's like an old school book.
Kyle called this morning whenwe were driving and he was like
they're talking about AbrahamLincoln.
I'm over it, yeah, but it'sreally interesting.
It's about, like, how to winpeople over by being positive
more than, um, negative in aleadership role, which is really
(13:49):
interesting.
Um, I recently I'm just beinggoing to be honest like Kristen
Cavalieri, we I recently lostone of our team members at real
estate.
You know you guys have been onthis journey with us.
I was quitting a year ago.
I'm back.
Business is actually super goodfor us right now.
The team's doing amazing, theteam's super small, but I just
(14:10):
lost someone One of my very,very, very close agents.
She's been with me for sevenyears, so it was really hard on
me the last couple weeks becauseI'm very personal and like what
did I do wrong?
How could I have handled thisbetter?
Was I not enough?
You know and things have justchanged a lot in the last year
since my dad's passed and I maybe a different leader, but I,
(14:30):
reading this book, I'm learning.
Did I motivate the right way?
Did I give enough?
Um, oh, it's making me.
Did I give enough?
Oh, it's making me emotional.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
Did.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
I give enough, like Tom, it's okay, like I don't
know.
It talked about how this isreally weird.
I haven't been crying a lot atall either, so it's super weird.
But did I give enough likepositive reinforcement?
And I think that's why, likeKyle, was nails on a chalkboard
for me, because I'm reading thebook on how to like motivate
(14:58):
people by positivity and maybeI'm like feeling guilty about
that, because as a leader, Ilike things done.
A certain way I'm very laidback in life, but at work Tisha
would agree Like everything forWhole Twerf Homes is done.
We have very high expectationsand I wondered did I not make
that person feel valued, feelspecial, feel like her or his
(15:22):
opinion mattered?
It's a her, but, um, I don'tknow.
And it talked about howimportant it is for people to
feel valued.
That's like everyone's mainneed and I'm like how often does
that happen, even at home?
Like I was telling you thismorning, I forgot to pay for
Hudson's cheer fee and and Ifeel like sometimes with Maddie
I didn't forget as much withstuff because she's first, and
I'm like that didn't make Hudsonfeel valued.
(15:43):
Right, that, like I did, thatwasn't a priority of mine and
sometimes, like we've been outof town a lot and I'm like maybe
Broxton's not feeling he's beenacting up a little when we're
like together and I think heneeds my attention, right.
I'm like how often do peopleleave a relationship or a
business, or even a friendship?
I've had a lot of friends.
This is really like therapyright now.
I've had a lot of friends thatstruggle with me because they
(16:05):
don't feel valued because I'm sobusy, right.
I don't know, it's a reallygood book, but it's very what's
that word?
Um, when you're being notconvicting, convicting, very
convicting for me, which Iactually love, like when I love
when something's convicting, butthis book is very convicting
for me, yeah, and I feel like alot of leadership books because
I've read them for years.
(16:26):
I actually am like yep, yep, notlike I have it all figured out
whatsoever, but this one waslike like every word.
I'm like Whoa.
I was seeing it as holding highexpectations means holding
everyone accountable, like every, every level should be here,
and if you're not here, I'mgonna say it and I'm like real
proud of myself that in myleadership field, I'm very
(16:47):
honest, I'm very up front.
I don't like keep a lot in, butis that the best thing?
Is there a better way?
I could have said things likeyou know a more motivating way
he talks out in the book andthey talked about at church.
Even the best way to get themost out of people is compliment
when they're doing what youwant, right.
But like with our kids, that'skind of what happened on
Saturday morning.
It was like the, the laundry'snot done and your room's a mess,
(17:08):
and I'm like we're pointing out10 things everyone did wrong,
instead of like the one timethey cleaned their room being
like I love when you clean yourroom like that, like that's the
that makes me so happy.
You know what I mean.
Even with our husbands I'm like, I'm so, I'm pretty positive
with the kids, to be honest, butwith Kyle I'm not.
I'm like, ah, why'd you do thatInstead?
Speaker 2 (17:25):
of like.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
Hey, I love when you get home and you take rocks and
you don't yell at us but it'shard to rewire your brain
because when you want to say,like, what not to do instead of
saying what to do, yeah, like asa coach, that's like a big
thing I am is like thepsychology of telling your
athletes what to do instead ofwhat not to do.
Right, like, hey, let's makesure we hit everything instead
(17:48):
of don't fall on that, right,it's like a very positive
mindset.
So you're focused on what to do, not what not to do.
Speaker 2 (17:54):
Right.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
But then in other areas it's like you know, kyle,
stop yelling at the kids andyou're being like, and I'll say
like you're being annoying andthey don't want a dad like that,
and that's like horrible.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
It's not being positive.
Yeah, but you're only human,yeah, no-transcript you.
(18:25):
Yeah, that's good yeah, but Ifeel like with you know the team
member that left, I thinksometimes I think it's great
that you take things so personal, because I think that's what
makes you a great leader,because you you are thinking
it's something that you canalways, it's always in your
control to fix and makeeverything great for everybody.
But sometimes people are juston their own path and I think
(18:46):
sometimes we never are going tonaturally leave our comfort zone
and so sometimes things justhappen to us and it doesn't mean
you weren't a great leader oryou aren't a great leader.
I think you are.
I think maybe it's justsometimes things run their
course and it's hard, and Ithink it's great that you're
reflecting and it'll only makeyou better for the remaining
team members, you know, but Idon't think it was anything you
(19:09):
did wrong.
I think time, yeah, and you werejust going through your own
thing and and that person'sgoing through their own thing.
They're going through your ownthing and and that person's
going through their own thing.
They're going through lifethings too.
You know, like our kids aregetting older, you know going,
going away.
So there's so many things Ithink you just need to.
I do see what you're sayingabout being positive, but
(19:30):
there's also like you have toalso not take it all on yourself
.
You're you're not solelyresponsible for making someone
feel valued.
You know, because you're human.
The only person that can evertruly fulfill that for everyone
is God, and so if, if we'relooking like my husband can't
fulfill my every need, you, asmy boss, can't fulfill my every
(19:52):
need you know.
Speaker 1 (19:53):
So just trying to make you not think it's you
Right, and I do think things allhappen for a reason.
Yeah, it's like we have friendstoo that are going through
things.
Tisha and I are on probably 20group texts with me and her and
someone else, me and her andsomeone else.
It's pretty funny.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
It's like we're like the dynamic duo, like, yeah,
it's like drinking around hasturned into like and I think
that's part of it.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
Yeah, it's like, we do this together we do work
together.
It's kind of like we do lifetogether in a weird yeah, um,
let's be honest way.
Let's be honest yeah, but we'renot lesbians, as you guys know,
but one of us wants to be well,I like that new girl at cheer
now, so she does have this girlshe really likes.
I have a crush.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Yeah, it's something kind of like the guy I like saw
this shirt in my closet theother day and I was like oh, she
wore something like that.
And I was like I wonder if Iwear that.
And then I was like what iswrong with you, you know?
No, you are really into her too.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
It's real funny, it's so weird.
Yeah, she's great though.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
But I think sometimes pivot is sometimes and we
talked about this before, causeI saw it on a, on a short but,
like God's, pivot is sometimes ablessing and I do feel like all
everything happens for a reason, but I do always try to like,
learn and grow from everything,which you should.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
That's the if you can take away a learning experience
from something happening thathurts you, then it's positive,
you know.
So that's a great quality.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
But Well, it's funny because on the way here we were
talking, it doesn't always meanyou need to change everything.
I know you're right and, on theway, here we were talking about
a lot of things that we'll getinto, because we kind of just
try to outline what we're goingto talk about.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Right.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
But it's funny because years ago when we
started growing the team, it waslike so exciting and if any of
you are realtors or anyone outthere that has thought about
growing a team in any capacity,I, you guys know, if you listen,
I like to be more like thebigger and better kind of person
.
Tisha's more like content withsmaller private.
We're like opposite, like that.
(21:45):
So, when real estate took offand then our team started to
grow, it was exciting for me.
I'm like, okay, let's be thebest team and the biggest team
out there, Right, I mean notbigger per se, but we were
having a lot of people asked tobe on our team you know, and we,
we do do real estatedifferently.
It's very about the people, it'svery about our clients and we
kind of have a different edge tothe way we do things.
(22:07):
So I think it started to getattention.
And it's hard for me.
I'm like, oh, I'll help them,let's bring them on, let's bring
them on.
And our team grew and grew andit was a blessing to be able to
have so many people.
But what happened is justfinancially, as from a business
standpoint, bigger isn't alwaysbetter.
When bigger grew, then biggerexpenses grew, then bigger
(22:28):
responsibilities grew, thenbigger overhead grew.
And for me, you see all thesebig teams or you see these
influencers, or you see allthese people, especially on
social media, where it lookslike bigger is better, and for
me, I want to tell you bigger isnot better.
So, like, what's happened is, Ifeel like we climbed and we
climbed and we climbed and I gotto the top and it was like
that's kind of what happenedwhen my dad died.
I feel like we were doing allthe things and we were growing.
(22:48):
Like right before, probably ayear before my dad died, I went.
I feel like I'm at the top,where I can taste the top, I can
see where these people are andit's like up here it sucks.
It's way better when you'reback to the root of why you do
things More money, more problems.
It is like there's more overhead, like I was making the most
money I've ever made, but I wastaking home the least because I
(23:09):
had to pay for everybody and Ihad to do everything and I was
to grow.
Your name costs money andbranding and and this and that,
and to keep all your clientshappy and coming in.
It's like it costs money togrow.
So it's like funny.
I feel like I've gone the otherway.
Now it's like scaling down.
I want to go back to why I gotinto this.
And it was for the people andthe clients and I actually we
talk about this a lot I love thedeal.
(23:29):
I don't love the big team, Idon't love managing people all
the time.
I just love helping people inthe deal, you know.
So I feel like as we're scalingdown, it's probably like you're
shedding your skin, like itjust changes.
So now I feel like we're backto the root of like how I
started and I am super happy, soI didn't have to quit.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
More relationship focused, thus business focused.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
Yeah, totally, and more like what's in front of me
instead of the big picture.
Yeah, so in real estate it'shard to run a business and take
care of your clients, so youkind of go into two lanes.
So now I feel like we're justtaking care of our clients.
Running the business is inGod's hands.
Yeah, hope that works.
I guess we'll see it's goinggreat, yeah, but yeah, it's
(24:21):
funny because weeks ago it'slike it's I, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
You know what I mean.
Yeah, it's like who cares, likewe're making a difference to
help people.
You know, and like that isreally what you care about you
know, and I like the list.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
Totally.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
I'm just.
I don't know why I'm not likethat.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
I wish I was wired more.
I know I want to not be wiredlike that.
I'm like am I a loser that I'mnot more like no, I think it's
just a validation that like,yeah, in our business it's so
numbers based, which our numbersare really good, right, but
it's like it's just a pissingcontest.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
It's so much, I think in any business right Like
there's levels, lot of affairsBecause there was a lot of happy
hours and then with drinkingcomes canoodling and like all
that fake business stuff.
Speaker 2 (25:02):
I'm not doing a happy hour with anybody.
We don't do any of that.
Speaker 1 (25:04):
No, nothing, no, we just jerk around.
Anyways, speaking ofinfluencers, key documentary
this weekend with Kyle, and shewas a YouTube star that started
recording her family Right Yearsand years ago.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
They were like married With five kids.
Yeah, In Utah.
They're Mormon right In Utah.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
Oh, sorry, I didn't get your messages no.
Yeah, they're just people inUtah.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
People in Utah.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
Might have had different beliefs, and they were
.
She had six kids, yeah, so theywere eight passengers.
Was their YouTube handle whenit was all about their family,
right?
So they would video theirfamily and it was really fun at
first and then it became likethe business.
So it showed like behind thescenes videos that they got from
her yeah, you know she's injail and it showed her like now,
smile, and then it would belike live, and then the kids
(25:57):
would all be laughing and itwould show the camera like when
she put it down, and it would belike like Muffy, like it was
like crazy.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
It's weird that Kyle watched it with you and then
he's like I feel like it's likeTisha like yelling at her kids.
Not say that, not the recordingpart, but just the yelling like
he said that I think he wasbeing funny, you know, because
I'm always yelling at my kids,you know it's like so funny,
yeah, like very smiling.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Yeah, we're going to Disneyland, and if you don't
want to, be, happy at Disneyland.
But that part was likerelatable.
So I was like, okay, am I goingto jail because like yeah, I'm
all well, it's your competition.
Speaker 2 (26:31):
Ken won't take a picture of me.
I'm like I pay millions ofdollars.
You better take your pictureright now or you're not.
You're kicked off, like youknow.
I get crazy.
It's fine, you know.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Yeah.
So I'm like am I going to go tojail?
You know, like Ruby Frankie iskind of relatable, so the
beginning was all relatable andher husband was like I.
His perspective was actuallyreally interesting for a man.
He was like a dork, yeah.
And he was like validation,yeah, that he wasn't a dork.
(27:04):
He was very fit, like oh, hewas getting like yes, and he was
like I was getting fulfilled bylike finally making it, you
know, and um.
So they grew into this bigfamily but it's crazy, the kids
didn't want a video anymore.
They said their whole life.
It was like the Ted, what'sthat show?
The Truman Show or something.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Oh yeah, where it's all video.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
Video and they're like our house became a set.
Yeah, our vacations became aset.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
Well, I follow some people on Instagram and I'm like
thinking I'm like these poorkids, oh, so many people on
Instagram and Facebook andYouTube and it's 24 7 and you
can tell the kids are likelooking at the camera and
they're like, do you like thattoy?
Swipe up.
And I'm like the kid isn't likethe toy, you know, but it's
crazy.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
I know and this is our generation.
Yeah, like, this is real, Iknow, and sometimes I fall for
it.
We text um.
Tisha and I and mysister-in-law we text about
things in Instagram.
Yeah, and sometimes we're likeooh, look at this.
And they're like do you picturethat?
They have a tripod set up?
And it's funny, because we'reso like elementary and I don't
think about that.
Yeah, like when you're watchingit, you think, oh, that looks
(28:07):
so cool.
Speaker 2 (28:08):
Like there's a fly on the wall.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
But it's like it's so funny I fall right.
It would be someone you wouldhate.
So she wakes up at 5 o'clockevery day and works out.
She has four kids.
I hate those people.
She does her reading everymorning, oh you would hate her.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
It's so cute.
Speaker 1 (28:31):
And I'm eating it every day.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
I'm like I'm going to wake up at 5 o'clock oh like
eat blueberries in my oatmealevery day.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
Yes, it's like bed, it's all of it.
I'm like, oh my God, it's soboring.
She makes sourdough everymorning.
I'm asleep.
She has four boys.
She's having a fifth boy andshe said Mama, four boys Every
day.
It's the Mama, the designer,and she's a Christian and it's
like I'm having Brooke.
I'm like I'm going to startdoing what Brooke's doing.
(29:01):
Yeah, I'm never doing that.
Oh, I'm doing all of Brooke'sthings.
She puts red lipstick on everyday.
I might start putting redlipstick on every day.
She like made this.
It's like so someone you'd hate.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
She made like a book with like laminated pages for
her Disney World trip, yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
And then was selling the book on how they do Disney
and I hate Disney and I was like, should I get the book, like
Brooke?
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
I should make a book on how to wipe you know I fell
right into it.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
I know, but now, when you picture the tripod, you're
like you're right.
Yeah, you know, it's not thesame.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
But I can't stop watching.
Nothing is just what it seems.
I make sourdough, then I wantto record things and because I'm
like, oh, I should do this, andmy kids are like so
uncooperative, they're like god,mom, like, like, or I'm like I
smiled, like don't post it, likeit's so crazy.
I know they hate like anything.
I could never be like anInstagram star, right, and
that's the fact that, like noone's watching, but yeah no, but
like it starts with no onewatching.
Yeah, no, my, my kids are souncooperative.
And then, ben, I'm, I'll take apicture of me and it's all the
(30:04):
worst angle.
You know, like the husbands areso recording and they're, like
Brooke's, always taking apicture of the red lipstick yeah
, and they're watching, or likethe husband's recording the wife
and she's like holding the kidsout.
I'm'm all get a picture of mecarrying.
You know it's like the worstangle.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
He's horrible, I know , but what the weirdest thing is
with so many of these people,brooke Ray, I can't read the
word r-a-w wait, r-a-y-b-o-u-l-d, raybould I don't know how'd
you get Brooke Burke from that.
I don't know, isn't she acelebrity?
Speaker 2 (30:34):
yeah, she used to be on my.
Watch her stomach, I know, doyou get?
Speaker 1 (30:37):
that like ad.
So Kyle is next to me the otherday.
And the ad for Brooke.
He goes every day and I likestarted doing sit-ups.
Her ad.
Have you seen Brooke?
She's like in her underwear,yeah, it's the best.
So Kyle's next to me and I'msliding through Instagram.
He goes who is that?
What is that?
And I'm like it's an ad andhe's like who's that girl?
(30:57):
And it's like her side.
I've never seen she's in likeunderwear?
Speaker 2 (31:00):
yes, but it's like, I see it every day, it's like the
best body.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Yeah, it is it's every day they're moving.
Look mama, for boys.
You see her.
They're in matching outfits.
We're not finding out thegender of the baby in spandex oh
my god yeah, and she wakes upat five every day.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
Mama wait this is the real reason why moms are so
tired.
Did you know moms make over 200decisions a day.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
Yeah, and she has a whiteboard in her house.
I'm like I need to get awhiteboard in my house.
I know you totally are likedoing all those things yeah to
four boys.
Speaker 2 (31:33):
This is our husband wife 5 am morning routine.
Speaker 1 (31:36):
10 years into parenting, we've developed a
10-step morning routine that'stransformed both our marriage
and the way we parent.
Every time I'm like writingthose steps down.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
See, this is annoying , though, because let me tell
you why it's annoying.
First, it's annoying becausepeople are making money.
She's making money off peopletrying to make their mornings
better yeah, but, like they'reprobably more stressed out
because they can't master this10 steps.
And she homeschools, yeah, andyou're just making her money.
And it's dumb, oh, and shetakes cold showers.
She probably doesn't even dothat.
She probably just records itonce and then sells it and
(32:05):
people are buying it and they'reall stressed out trying to do
the morning.
Oh, I have been stressed out.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
If someone recorded my morning, it's all it's all tj
yells at me is my heating padhot, you know?
And then it's all him puttingthe heating back.
I'm a mama for a kid sitting onthe couch, I'm a mama for, and
I'm all and I'm all you know.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
I'm like reading my devotional scrolling.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
I love that about you though because I always fall
into this crap.
I'm not always fall into it andI'm like always the
overachiever personality yeah,and Tisha's like not, no, and
she's like I'm not doing thatand like you're still very
productive in life.
I'm so productive, yeah, andyou're not doing any of it no,
she waits, I'm gonna make, I'mgonna make a guide for.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
Now she has a bedding company yeah.
Oh yeah, like bedding a bag.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Yeah, yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, her and her husband.
He's a lawyer, they're movingto Texas.
They're doing it yeah, oh yeah.
And she meets on Sunday nights.
I don't even want to tell youthey have a family planning
meeting, oh yeah, with herhusband, and then they type up
the agenda of the week.
Their kids must want to justlike run away.
I know it does kind of lookfunny, it's too much.
(33:16):
Yeah, Disneyland was stressful.
She had red lipstick on everyday, though.
Yeah, it's not fun.
Speaker 2 (33:19):
Yeah, she had her outfits planned oh my gosh, mine
it guide.
Like marry a husband that makesyour coffee and does the
laundry.
And then, like, wake up incities, cities, yeah, cities for
minimum 45 minutes.
Isn't that long?
It's like 30, yeah, but likethey know, don't talk to me, I'm
not doing it like I'm doing mycoffee.
Speaker 1 (33:40):
It's not my fault, you didn't do your homework last
night exactly I'm not gonna bein a rush and miss my cities.
She wakes up at 5 am, she worksout, she runs two miles a day
and does 20 minutes of strengthtraining every single day.
Then she takes a cold showerand gets dressed for the day.
She believes that gettingdressed like fully cute outfit
every single day makes her feelmore productive and I can see
that for some people.
So I'm all trying to get in thecold shower.
Speaker 2 (34:03):
I keep feeling it.
And if you're not that type Apersonality, like if I tried to
do that, I would be so stressedout, miserable, because and I'd
be setting myself up for failurebecause it's not like something
I'm good at, yeah, so for me,I'm like get a hike in today, it
doesn't matter.
If it's 5 o'clock, I don't needto wake up.
I'm never waking up at 5 am.
No, so I o'clock.
(34:32):
It might be you know you hike alot of days, but I'm hiking all
the time.
Exactly, you get it in thereand you get it in.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
That's great for a type a personality but, like
there needs to be, you can stillbe successful and be a type b.
You know, and I wouldn't sayyou're a type b at work at all,
no, I'm very type a than me.
Speaker 2 (34:38):
Yeah, I get back to people right away, but there's
things I'm not doing.
Speaker 1 (34:41):
But how many people watch Brooke rebuild and feel
less than that's?
Speaker 2 (34:45):
what I'm saying, cause you're not doing that and
you don't need Disneyland withthe color coded or whatever.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
Oh, and the outfits, no and all of those Disney
outfits, you know, I know.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
I hate a matching outfit.
It's so expensive and.
Speaker 1 (34:56):
I'm like they're always shopping at like Sprouts
together as a family and I'mlike we should drop a Sprouts
together as a family.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
I store.
No, I'm never going to thegrocery store.
I'm overpaying instacart, oh mygod.
Speaker 1 (35:10):
I'm tipping $80.
It's outrageous.
I do that too, and last nightwe went to go get um my niece's
birthday today, so we went lateto go get her something yeah, I
went, and Hudson goes 6 am thisis mortifying.
My daughter goes.
This is my second time everI've been in fries ever, ever,
really.
That she can remember?
Yeah, because we didn't haveinstacart when we were little.
We took them all the time.
They always went groceryshopping with me.
I remember having all mine onthe cart.
Speaker 2 (35:30):
Yeah, what's happening?
This is awful.
Oh, is it bad that last nightKen told me I need to bring the
gift and so I was on instacartat 10 o'clock last night and I
was gonna instacart it, but it's.
They don't do good at pickingout balloons and flowers, so I
had to go this morning.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
Yeah, anyways yeah no , I do feel like the, so I
watched that one.
I forgot her name now BrookeRay, something.
No, the one.
Ruby Frank.
Okay, so Ruby Frank.
So what happened with Ruby?
Let me do it.
Oh, yeah, yeah, they startedfollowing this influencer Back
then.
It wasn't even an influencer,it was crazy.
(36:03):
She's a therapist.
It was Hillebrand.
Her name was Hillebrand,something, hillebrand.
She was single.
This is what drives me nuts,like why do people follow
marriage advice for someone thatisn't even?
I don't even know if she everhad been married, right, like
she doesn't know.
No, and her kids?
Yeah, she's estranged from herkids.
Yeah, why are we listening?
(36:24):
She lived alone in this um likeSedona in Utah, where we
stopped, where we stopped in forthe.
The oh, st George in St Georgein the middle of nowhere is
where she lives.
So I'm like she lives in themiddle of nowhere by herself,
but she is a marriage and familyperson, but none of her kids
(36:45):
are with her right, I don'tthink they were that old.
Speaker 2 (36:47):
Yeah, that's what we call a red flag.
Yes, yeah, like giant red flag.
Speaker 1 (36:51):
Yeah then she has these men in these groups.
They're in these facetimegroups talking about sexual
impurity and she's yelling atthem that they're lustful and
that they want to do weirdthings to their wife.
It was like, oh god he wants todo all the things.
Men are like feeling bad.
They want to do these thingsand she's all.
(37:12):
You're lusting, your wife andI'm all.
Isn't that what like is good?
Like, aren't you supposed to.
Speaker 2 (37:18):
I'm at your house.
You should be like sprayingholy water all over that bitch
but like that's normal, isn't it?
Speaker 1 (37:28):
it is normal, like it was weird.
She's like you gotta do allthis, oh my gosh so this lady's
an idiot.
Speaker 2 (37:34):
And why are men listening to a woman?
Sorry, that's stupid.
Oh, like a guy shouldn't listento a woman's advice about sex
yeah, no, yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
So they're all in this group every week.
I'm like these men, these menso demasculating, so this girl.
Speaker 2 (37:48):
Yeah, her husband sounds like a little bitch Whose
Ruby's.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
Yeah, he was.
Yeah, I could tell it getsreally bad.
So okay, so Hill and Brand,they take over this lady.
Her son started acting up thisis so sad because he was sick of
being on camera.
Yeah, so he started acting up.
He got kicked out of school.
Ruby's crying on the thing.
My son got kicked out of school, which I was like wow, I
wouldn't tell anybody, I'd belike there he is going to school
and put back in his room rightlike brooke raybilled or
(38:19):
whatever.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
Maybe that's why your kids are homeschooled.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
They all got kicked out, yeah, but it's looking
perfect.
Speaker 2 (38:23):
Yeah, exactly you know.
Speaker 1 (38:24):
So I'm like, wow, she's telling him she's crying.
He got kicked out.
So then he started doing weeklytherapy with this lady, so he
now like loves her it gets soweird to you.
Speaker 2 (38:35):
Yeah, she like brainwashed these people.
So then it's so.
I can't stand when people getbrainwashed by people.
It drives me nuts.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
It's in these conferences called connections
with an ex, and then they like,do all these talks and and what
happened is jody, is that hername?
What's the lady?
Ruby, ruby, I'm thinking jody,areas, you're like talking about
now jody areas.
That's horrible.
It turns, I'm telling you.
It turns.
Ruby kyle keeps calling me rubyat home too, like when I'm
yelling he's like Ruby and I'mlike, yes, awful, so, okay.
(39:10):
So the Hillenbrand lady nowthey're all doing these
connections, now they'respeakers for connections.
She took her son's bed away forseven months.
He had to sleep in the basementon a bean bag.
This is when things start toturn.
Yeah, that's weird.
Because he's being selfish, andthe selfish is from the devil,
right, yeah, so she's startingto like really lay it down.
Speaker 2 (39:30):
Spiral.
Speaker 1 (39:31):
So they were like a normal family, with the yelling
and everything.
Yeah, that was all normal.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
So the lady is like culty, right?
Yes, so she's telling him thatit's the devil.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
Yes, yeah, you know, we got to get the kids to mind.
And then the kids said yeah, Islept on a beanbag for seven
months.
So YouTube lights her up, whichthey should Totally, you know.
They light her up and saidyou're abusing this kid blah
blah blah.
Speaker 2 (39:54):
Yeah, why wasn't CPS?
Speaker 1 (39:55):
called.
Oh, CPS was called like 10times on these kids.
And they didn't do anythingbecause there was no evidence of
abuse.
Once it turns, let me tell youabuse.
Once it turns, let me tell you,yeah, yeah, I don't know if
anybody cares, but I did careabout the documentary, so, ruby.
So then she starts like being aspeaker on like because Helen
Brand and the lady is not cute,not saying that, people only
follow cute people because Ionly follow cute people, oh my
(40:20):
god, she says that a lot.
I don't but Brooke does have thered lipstick and she's very
pretty.
Yeah, brooke Raybould, orwhatever bald.
Yeah, I don't know how to saythat word.
Yeah, anyways.
So the Helen Brand is not cuteand it's weird.
I can't believe the followingbecause I'm not seeing it.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
So anyway, yeah, like why aren't people following us
and they're following her.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
So the Helen Brand is in the Red Rocks or whatever
what's it called In Utah, likeshe's having like satanic things
where she like is seeing weirdthings around her house.
Speaker 2 (40:48):
Oh, like paranormal activity.
I read that yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, no, it's the devil, yeah.
Speaker 1 (40:53):
Yeah, so it gets weird.
So she's like he's here.
Speaker 2 (40:56):
So is she making it up?
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
So the whole family of the eight passengers goes out
to the house and they're likethere's too many weird things.
She's she's got to come livewith us so she moves in.
This is like black.
That's when things get weird.
So now at night she's havingthese.
In her night she's having theseterrors and there's videos of
her like, like in tongues andit's bad.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
I shouldn't laugh.
This is horrible that thishappened to these kids.
So in the middle of the nightit's happening.
We can't make that a clip?
Speaker 1 (41:22):
So now, Ruby goes and has to sleep in her room with
Hillenbrand because she has tohelp keep the people away.
Speaker 2 (41:30):
This is reminding me of that stupid kid.
Do you remember that onekidnapped in plain sight?
Yes, that's what it's like whenI'm like these people are
idiots.
Speaker 1 (41:38):
That's exactly what it's like, and it's all
happening slow, like the frogeffect, yes, and they're not
realizing this woman is ruiningyour life.
So now the kids are gettingpunished all the time because
Hillenbrand's living there.
So now the wife is in the bedwith the Hillenbrand and the
daughter the oldest daughter isstarting to see things are going
weird.
Yeah, and sees like massageoils on the thing and like all
this weird stuff by the bed.
Speaker 2 (41:57):
So they're having like a three.
Speaker 1 (41:59):
No, not with the daughter.
Speaker 2 (42:01):
No, the husband in the white.
Speaker 1 (42:01):
No, the husband's in his own bed, oh shoot.
She's with the Hillenbrand, ohshoot.
So then they decide that thehusband, that they need space,
they kick the husband out andthey kick the son out, the son
that fixed his life.
Yeah, and they're not allowed totalk to each other or the
family, yeah, cause that'snormal For one year, one year
they don't talk and the and thehusband just leaves Cause he's
thinking that Hillenbrand, he'snot being godly and he needs to
(42:25):
give separation for a year.
While they're out of the house,the abuse starts with the kids.
They think the two kids aresatanically possessed oh my gosh
.
So they lock him in a room withno food or water.
The kid had duct tape around hisankles, hadn't eaten in weeks.
They were like cutting him,like physically to get the
demons out, or whatever.
(42:45):
The journal entries she had hadshe's fully saying what's
happening.
They're possessed.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
The kid ran do you think she really believed that?
She believed it because of thislady.
It's weird.
It's like how are people thatsusceptible?
Speaker 1 (42:57):
and they're like so the dad was not around because
he was not allowed to talk andthe son wasn't allowed to talk,
and so then the kid ran to theneighbor's house.
That's what you can see, thevideo where the kid goes to the
neighbor.
Yeah, he's the one that savedhim, right?
Yeah, and then the kid ran tothe neighbor's house.
That's what you can see.
The video where the kid goes tothe neighbor yeah, he's the one
that saved him, right?
Yeah?
And then the dad gets calledand the wife Jodi, or whatever
her name is, what's her name?
Ruby Ruby calls the husband andis like the kid is telling the
(43:18):
police bad things about me.
He's saying I did all thesethings You've got to go get him.
And he's he feels horrible.
Now he's like I can't believe Ifell for all this.
Yeah, my kids were being abusedand I left them there and
didn't call them because theytold me not to call for a year.
So then she goes to jail.
They both plead guilty, her andHillenbrand, and and I don't
(43:38):
know if the kids are back withthe dad, but the oldest daughter
, who knew what was going on?
She calls him Ruby and his name.
Yeah, like I don't think theyhave a relationship but like
pretty normal family went Southall from Instagram and Hill and
bread and YouTube.
Speaker 2 (43:51):
It's weird Cause I feel I don't like to judge
because I don't want, cause younever.
well, I sometimes judge, but umyou never know when you try not
to judge, yeah, but I try not to, because you never know when
something can happen to you.
But I feel pretty confidentsaying like I would never be
susceptible to like followingsomeone like that.
That's so weird.
(44:11):
But there are so many people.
I've always said like I feellike God created.
We're created in God's image.
You know.
God created us.
We're supposed to work.
We're created to worship him.
So I feel like if you're notworshiping him, you're very
susceptible to following andworshiping someone else.
And there's so many whackedpeople out there that people are
(44:32):
following and listening to andthey're miserable.
Like it's weird.
Like we were talking about DaveHollis, which I'm sure he's
really nice, but he was like amotivational, but then he was
like he died of like addictionand yeah.
But I'm saying like people are.
People are making these choicesand following this person Based
on false pretenses, right, andpeople are sinful in nature.
(44:52):
Like people make mistakes.
You can't put somebody on apedestal.
Only God you know.
But it's just weird.
Speaker 1 (44:58):
I'm like Well, I agree, I don't think we're ever
supposed to put any other idolsbesides him, but it's crazy.
That's what bothers me aboutsocial media and influencers,
and that's what we try to not betotally.
We say way too much on herebecause we're trying to so be
without like the guard yeah, wedon't have anything figured out,
we don't have anything figuredout.
we say it, that's our wholeintro.
(45:19):
Yeah is like we're.
We're a mess, just like you,and maybe you're not a mess, but
we really don't want to.
We want more people to knowthat all the things that are
going through are real Right,because I think more people are
like us than like Brooke Rebuildor whatever her name is Right.
I do want the red lipstick, butit would look weird on me.
Yeah, like every day, every day.
So at Disneyland she went tothe store to get the red
(45:39):
lipstick and I was like, shouldI go to CVS?
To the phone.
Speaker 2 (45:43):
I know.
Speaker 1 (45:44):
We're literally brainwashed, even with flights,
like we're being brainwashed tobe scared of these things and
we're being brainwashed to tobelieve these things.
Like it's crazy what the phonesthat's what church was about
this week was anxiety and howwe're anxious because we're on
screens and we're listening toeverything around us and it's
making us anxious and we're notlike following peace, which we
(46:04):
were going to talk about today.
Speaker 2 (46:05):
But we can talk about everything else.
Do we have time?
No, I sent.
I sent on our group chat.
This morning we have a familygroup chat and I sent this thing
that I saw on Instagram.
I like screenshot it.
It was like you wouldn't watcha movie of someone sitting there
on their phone all day.
So like, don't have that beyour life.
Speaker 1 (46:33):
Go out there and be like the main character, like go
live.
It was like cute the way it wasworded, like no one's watching
a movie of me gambling.
Yes, yeah, so get off and golive, you know, and be a main
character in your own life.
Well, that's what kyle was likeelbowing me, usually at church
I'm elbowing him, yeah.
And this week it was likeyou're on screens.
It like walked through people'sdays, right, like how everyone
wakes up and then they checktheir screens and then the news
tells us all these things arewrong with the world and you
start your day like that andthen, you're yelling at your
kids and you send them off, thenyou go to work and get yelled
at by bad leaders that aren'tpositive.
And then you go home and thenyou're on your screens and
(46:55):
you're cooking dinner and thenyou get in bed and then you want
to be alone Because that's likeone of my big things is instead
of choosing peace and choosingto, and he's like your kids
don't need social media.
You don't need social media.
You don't need to be slave tothose things.
Speaker 2 (47:12):
Yeah, I saw it said like something we missed it
because we had a baseballtournament and then we had the
cheer competition, so we missedthis weekend, but we're gonna
watch it.
But I saw like a recap onInstagram and it said something
yeah, like we're so obsessedwith like being successful on
social media and getting thelikes and all that, that there's
no peace, no peace.
And it's like it's really sadfor our kids.
Speaker 1 (47:34):
I think all of us have a lot of pressure.
Yeah, like I just talked about,I had all this pressure on me
as a leader.
Pressure, you know, because Isee other teams or other
realtors doing this and that andI feel like I should do that
Right.
And it's like our kids are inthat, you know, because they are
on social media.
They see all these things.
We drove around to go get thisstupid Dubai chocolate yesterday
(47:54):
from Zupas.
Speaker 2 (47:55):
Oh, the Zupas Because it's trending on TikTok.
Speaker 1 (47:58):
But I don't know.
I think all that's fine.
I don't think I'm not at aplace where I'm going to take my
kids off of social media yet,but I do think I keep them, try
to keep them pretty busy so theydon't have a lot of time to be
on it, but I don't know ifthat's right either, um, but I
think peace and like slowingdown and not.
I think the biggest thing is Isee a lot of influencers and we
(48:18):
see a lot of people in our lives, too that look perfect on
Instagram and then you get toknow them in person and you're
like Whoa, what I was seeing andwhat's happening is so
different.
Not always bad too, it's justdifferent than what it's
perceived.
But I'll see couples on therethat look like the happiest
couples in the world and thenext week they moved out and
it's like you don't understandthe story, right, like what
happened.
How did you go from a to b?
(48:39):
Right?
Speaker 2 (48:39):
because they weren't posting that.
It was like yeah, it's gettingbad.
You know how would you postthat, though?
Speaker 1 (48:44):
like I can't stand my husband today yeah and I do
think that's normal.
Like again, that's somethingthat people don't talk about is
like you're not going to feelgood about yourself every day.
We talked about that last week,the struggles of trying to be
healthy and fit and and do right, but you're not going to love
your husband.
You love your husband every day, but you don't like him all the
time.
Yeah, that's normal.
I don't like myself all the time, right, right, I like you most
(49:05):
of the time, though that's weird, I know it's a little bit
different.
But like even your kids, I knowYou'll feel like a good mom one
day and you'll feel like theworst mom the next day.
And I'll feel like a goodrealtor and then I'll feel like
the worst realtor.
Then I'll feel like I'll begood with money.
(49:31):
Then, all of a sudden, I putsomething on the credit card and
I'm out of control again.
I think it's just like givingeach other grace to be more
honest about these things.
That's what I love about ourfriendship is it's always the
truth.
Yeah, and I think a lot ofpeople don't maybe have real
people in their life that tellthem you know, I was yelling at
my kids all night and I feel bad, yeah.
So then they feel like okay,yeah, so then they feel like
okay, I've done that too.
You know that's what we'retrying to be here, jerking
around.
Yeah, so we'll be your friend,me too, our own, me too.
Movement, yeah, yeah, I yelltoo that's crazy, though, about
(49:53):
Ruby Frank.
Speaker 2 (49:54):
I just cannot believe that someone actually let
someone like move in and do allthat.
Speaker 1 (49:58):
It's so crazy it's so crazy and the dad is like a
good man.
They were a good family.
But I think it's like anothertestament to like be careful
what you let in your life, inall areas oh, you have to be so
protective.
Speaker 2 (50:10):
I'm very protective.
I feel like of my you know Icould be better.
Speaker 1 (50:14):
You've gotten better yeah, everybody, I'm like I love
you no, it's great, though it'sgood to be loving no.
I can be more loving we couldbe we help each other.
Speaker 2 (50:22):
Be more the other way , yeah, but no, I do think you
have to be protective of what?
Because you just, and even whatyou're doing, you know.
Speaker 1 (50:31):
Well, with 75 Hard, I took out a lot of things in my
life.
Like I stopped watching realityTV, I was careful what I
listened to.
We don't realize what we'reputting in our bodies.
Speaker 2 (50:39):
Yeah, just like Garbage in, garbage out.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (50:42):
Like all those things .
But I things, but I haven'tgotten off social media yet, I
don't really watch it that much.
But I do do other weird thingslike play casino games on my
phone yeah, that's fine.
I don't know if it's fine.
Anyways, we'll see you nextweek, guys, have a good week.
Have a good week.
Welcome to jerking around apodcast that makes you feel
better about yourself, becausewe're a mess just like you, and
(51:03):
crystal makes fun of me and it's.
And it's great and it's real.
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