December 10, 2025 • 25 mins
Send me a Text Message! I am Happy to Hear from You.
The numbers are staggering, but the real story lives in your chest: trauma often teaches us to feel small, safe, and stuck. We take a clear-eyed look at how abuse and bullying can lock us into a victim mindset and then map a path to reclaim power without denying pain. I share personal experiences of turning a perceived limitation into fuel, including how I used simple tools and consistent practice to overcome language insecurity and keep building this show.
Together we unpack the quiet mechanics of change. It starts with responsibility that doesn’t blame you for what happened; it equips you to choose what happens next. You’ll learn eight practical shifts to move from victim to creator: own your inner world, upgrade your questions, separate identity from the past, take small daily actions, spot automatic thoughts, focus on controllables, rewrite your story, and accept that healing and progress happen at the same time. We talk about why inner peace is the first success, how quick external fixes backfire, and how steady habits rebuild confidence and momentum.
This is a grounded, compassionate guide for anyone ready to stop waiting and start building. Expect simple language, actionable ideas, and an honest invitation to choose one step today—journal for five minutes, set a boundary, or replace a complaint with a better question. Your story isn’t fixed, and your future doesn’t belong to the past. If this message resonates, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review to help more people find the tools to take their power back. What’s the one small action you will take today?
Warm regards,
Fabio Posca | Journey to Success
Join the Journey to Success Club Now!
Check out my Podcast
Collaboration: info@fabioposca.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
Did you know that?
On average, guys, 24 people perminute in the United States
become victims of rape, physicalviolence, stalking by an
intimate partner, and this addsup to more than 12 million women
and men over the course of asingle year, right?
(00:23):
And when we consider the rest ofthe world, we're talking about
hundreds, hundreds of millionsof people who have dealt with
such stories, unfortunately.
See, many of us, many of us haveexperienced some form of abuse,
okay, whether through bullying,family matters, abandonment,
(00:48):
psychological manipulation.
But what is the definition ofabuse at the end of the story?
There are different ways toexplain this, but generally, the
definition of abuse is themishandling of something in a
way that is harmful or morallywrong.
Okay.
(01:08):
So the question in this episodeis not whether you have been
abused, rather, it is about howyou can overcome the feelings of
darkness and oppression thatlive within you.
So, how can you move past theseexperiences to reach your goals?
Right?
Reach your goals, uh, reach yourdreams, and uh overall your true
(01:33):
purpose rather than uh living ina victim mentality.
Of course, we don't know yet,but that's what we're gonna talk
about today.
Hi guys, my name is Fabio fromJourney to Success and Welcome.
Today we introduce the conceptof the victim mentality and uh
(01:53):
its impact on personal growthand success.
Alright, and we're gonna discussalso how it can slow progress,
how it can slow relationshipsand overall happiness.
And I like the importance ofchange, but before we go
forward, as always, pleasesubscribe.
Alright, so I know this is theright direction to lead you
guys, to drive you, to guide youtowards your journey to success.
(02:19):
And let's get started, right?
As always.
So let's start from thebeginning.
First of all, when youexperience abuse, it can lead to
the development of trauma,alright?
Any type of trauma.
And the trauma itself can leadto severe conditions, all right?
(02:42):
From my own experience, I cansay that something harmful
happened to me in the past.
And one of the sad experiences II had, for example, one of one
of them was uh the victim ofbullying, which can uh lead to
trauma generally.
(03:03):
Okay.
In my case, why can lead totrauma?
Uh, for example, sometimes Ifind myself thinking about how I
would handle similar situationsdifferently than now.
You know, I don't do thisanymore because I I went
through, but I did for a longtime in my brain.
(03:26):
And but what I'm thinking rightnow, actually, is more about
how, when I have a child oneday, how we'll make sure that my
child do not have to go throughwhat I went through, you know,
talking about talking aboutbullying situations.
But something interesting aboutmyself is that have uh
(03:51):
interesting about myself and ofcourse interesting about towards
all the people who go throughtheir past traumas, is that have
chosen to shift my trauma,right?
So not to see myself as avictim, but to learn from my
past experiences.
Okay.
So for example, in this case, Idecided to start a podcast to
(04:15):
help as many people as I canthrough my journey.
And this reminds me also ofLouis Hose, you know, from the
School of Greatness, who wassexually abused and is now one
of the best podcasters in hisfield, in my opinion, of course.
So, what are the reasons behindthis?
(04:36):
Why do people seek to reach apoint where success becomes part
of overcoming their trauma?
Success can be a significantaspect of overcoming trauma
because processing it can leadto resilience, guys, can lead to
self-awareness, all right?
And of course can lead to a newsense of purpose.
(04:58):
But what happens when you cannotprocess your trauma?
What happens when you feel thatyou are not enough for the world
or the people around you?
In those cases, trauma can leadto a victim mentality and
self-sabotage as a way to managefeelings of helplessness and
(05:19):
fear of future harm.
Okay?
And this behavior can be seen asa protective response, but of
course, it is not the answer toanything you want to achieve
your life, right?
And consequently, this canhinder personal growth and
success.
So this can slow personal growthand success.
And I know someone with a victimmentality also, I know people
(05:44):
with a victim mentality, andfrom what I can see, they want
to change.
Of course they do.
But if they don't take seriouslythe fact that they are still
swimming in their trauma, allright, or that this trauma has
led to some severe conditions,then it's hard to change.
(06:05):
It's hard to make progress.
Without an inner knowledge oftheir trauma and how to go
through, it will be difficultfor them to build healthy
relationships, guys.
Okay, it will be difficult toadvance in their job and career.
It will be difficult to findhappiness and overall achieve
success in their life, right?
So living with mental, physical,and spiritual serenity is the
(06:31):
first and greatest success youcan achieve.
If you cannot achieve innerpeace, how can you expect to
achieve secondary goals likefinancial freedom, wealth
abundance, starting a family?
It is essential to address yourpersonal issues before pursuing
(06:52):
these goals, alright?
And this is the first concept Iwant you to understand.
I see so many people try to finda solution by adding more meat
to the fire to solve theirproblems, like making a child
try to fix a relationship, forexample.
(07:13):
Believing that having a childwill solve their issues, right?
Only to find themselves feelingmore broken than before.
But also many people seekwealth, right?
They want wealth, they wantmoney, thinking it will
alleviate their frustrations, orachieving your family wishes to
(07:33):
feel a sense of completenessbecause of that, you think you
are going to make them happy.
It is like using a plaster on adeep injury without cleaning or
taking the proper medications,guys.
Because of unresolved trauma,you may develop a victim
(07:53):
mentality.
You may lead you to blame othersfor your wrong actions based on
your past traumatic experiences.
Okay, you have to understandthat.
So at the end of the day, youwill find yourself victimizing
yourself because you'll gettrapped in a cycle that's hard
to break.
(08:14):
This happens because you don'twant to confront the truth,
right?
The truth is that you have toaddress past trauma first.
If you delay this process, youmay develop a condition that
requires you to acknowledge theneed for help, all right?
It is essential to understandthe origins of your trauma
(08:34):
before reaching whatever youwant to get in your life,
whatever you want to achieve inyour life.
So, how can you escape yourvictim mentality?
You can do it on your own way,of course, if your mindset is
strong enough to accept that noteverything that happens around
(08:55):
you is driven by other people,but more as a result of the
choices you make, which leads tocertain reactions, certain
reactions based on your actions.
And if you cannot acknowledgethis, you won't be able to
achieve success, alright?
Or the other alternative,acknowledging that there is
(09:20):
something wrong with thispattern, alright, that you
cannot handle on your own, andyou need to ask for help.
For over a decade, I dedicatedmyself to understanding what I
truly wanted to do with my life,all right.
(09:42):
And only now, after about 13years around, I'm beginning to
see the first results of myeffort.
Now, I'm not saying I have notbeen weak or that I have not
sometimes blamed externalfactors for the 13 years it took
me to reach my desired goal, allright.
But if I had persisted inblaming external factors for
(10:06):
slowing my progress, I wouldn'tbe here talking to you today.
You wouldn't listen to me rightnow.
So the moment you think yourprogress depends on others is
the moment you stop progressing.
Okay, you have to remember that.
It's the moment when, in mycase, personal example, I can no
longer find solutions to ensurethat even though I'm a native
(10:30):
Italian speaker, I can rise andexpress myself as I want.
Helping myself with any tool inmy package, like Google,
grammarly, you know, AI, theseresources help me articulate my
thoughts more clearly, helpingme to guide you better towards
(10:52):
your success.
Okay.
If I had told myself guys yearsago that I am Italian and that
my grammar is not as good as thenative English speaker, that's a
fact, that my accent is uh weirdcompared to other English
speakers, all right?
(11:13):
I would have set a limitation.
A limitation that would make mestop continuing with this path.
So such a mindset can slow yourprogress.
Can slow your progress, sopotentially slowing down your
progress or even blocking itentirely.
(11:34):
And of course, this way ofthinking is not the solution,
right?
The reality, guys, is that themoment you start thinking about
your limitations, it is themoment you should be focusing
more on yourself first,especially your self-esteem.
(11:54):
Yes, of course, many factors canslow down or even block your
progress, alright?
But you cannot always blameothers.
The truth is that if youpersevere, you can find
solutions, you know, to speed upagain or overcome the obstacles
that previously stopped you.
(12:15):
It's crucial to recognize thatyou have control over your
actions, guys.
Alright, so I mean, can youimagine what a sad life it would
be if we believed we didn't havecontrol over what we do?
This is the sense of a victimmentality, alright?
(12:37):
And uh I hope this exampleclarifies that for you.
So people with uh I had to drinksome water, guys.
I my throat is not that goodtoday.
But anyway, people with victimmentality often blame others and
believe without noticing thatyou know their parents,
(13:01):
relationships, friends, and soon have set untouchable limits
in their brain, creating uhmental barriers that cannot be
removed.
But if you always blame othersfor your trauma, okay, focusing
on the reactions of the people,the perceived limitation that
the people impose on you, youmay come to believe that you are
(13:24):
not responsible for your ownactions.
And without holding yourselfaccountable, the question is how
can you expect to grow andimprove?
That's the question here.
Okay.
Now, what are the main insightsor turning points that empower
(13:48):
individuals to shift from avictim mindset to a creator
mindset, right?
A mindset that is willing toreach success, any type of
success.
First, take responsibility foryour inner world.
Take responsibility for yourinner world, take responsibility
(14:09):
for your reactions, thereactions from the people, your
actions, your habits, yourchoices.
This is where personal powerbegins, all right?
Number two, change the questionyou ask yourself.
So victim usually make questionslike, Why is this happening to
me?
The creator question is morelike, What can I do with this?
(14:34):
So one question keeps you stuck,the other question moves you
forward.
Okay.
Number three, separate youridentity from your past.
You are not what happened, allright?
You are what you choose tobecome next, okay?
So this mindset shift frees youfrom repeating uh old patterns.
(14:57):
Number four, take one smallaction consistently.
Healing guys is not a big jump,all right?
It's a why it's about onedecision repeated every day.
Journaling, learning, settingboundaries, working on your
goals, speaking kindly toyourself.
Small steps build momentum.
(15:18):
Remember that.
Number five, build awareness ofyour thoughts.
The victim mindset is automatic,all right.
Creator mindset is intentional.
Start noticing thoughts like Ican't, like it's too late, like
they are stopping me.
(15:39):
These are signals, alright?
They're not truth.
Number six, focus on what youcan control.
Focus on your effort, yourmindset, your habits, your
energy, your environment.
Everything else is noise,alright.
Number seven, rewrite the storyyou tell yourself.
Victims waits, guys, waits foran opportunity that they'll
(16:04):
never come.
Creator builds, creators builds.
So change your inner narrativeand your external world begins
to shift, okay?
Number eight, the last one.
Accept that healing and progresshappen at the same time.
You know, you don't need to befully healed to start creating,
(16:26):
alright?
You only need uh willingnessbecause remember, action builds
clarity and clarity buildsconfidence, alright?
But you need to start first.
So before we wrap up, alright, Iwant to slow things down for a
(16:48):
moment.
What do we say today?
What did we talk about today?
We talk about heavy things, realthings, personal things, but
overall powerful things,alright, that are all powerful
things.
So let's take a break together.
Let's breathe together, andlet's sit with what we have
(17:11):
uncovered.
Because today, guys, wasn't justan episode only about trauma, it
wasn't not even about onlyvictim mentality or only about
success.
Today was is still an episode tomake you understand that there
is a there is a moment in yourlife where you hear a voice that
(17:33):
says enough, all right?
Enough, enough repeating all theold partners, enough letting
past experience decide yourfuture, decides for you, enough
giving your power away, okay.
That moment, that turning point,is where transformation begins,
okay?
So you need to hear that voice.
And I want to walk through thisslowly and deeply so you really
(17:56):
understand that.
When you grow up with trauma, orwhen life hits you in ways you
didn't expect, let's say in thisway, the victim mindset becomes
a kind of protection.
It feels safe to blame, it feelssafe to retreat, safe to say,
this is happening to me, youknow.
I mean, very enough.
(18:17):
It it makes sense, it's human,okay?
We understand that.
But staying there, like stayingthere keeps you small, guys.
It keeps you in survival mode,it keeps you believing that your
future is controlled by whateverhurts you are, okay?
And that's where the creatormindset becomes fundamental for
(18:38):
your journey.
Not because it ignores the past,not because it underestimates
the pain, but because it givesyou your power back.
So again, let's highlightslowly, clearly, deeply the
eight points we covered today toovercome this uh destructive
behavior that parasites yourlife.
(19:01):
All right, right.
Number one, again, takingresponsibility for your inner
world.
This is not about blamingyourself for what happened, all
right?
Remember that.
This is about reclaiming yourability to choose who you want
to be today, your reactions,your habits, your decisions.
(19:21):
This is where your the the yourreal power lives, you know.
Number two, changing thequestions you ask yourself.
The victim asks, why me?
The creator asks what now.
You know, one question keeps youfrozen, the other one uh opens a
new path.
(19:41):
Number three, separating youridentity from your past.
This one is huge, guys, becauseyou are not the trauma.
You're not the trauma, you'renot the bully, you're not the
you're not the abandonment,you're not the failures or the
mistakes.
You are the person who walkedthrough all of that.
And this person is still here,strong, stronger as as never,
(20:07):
still growing, still fightingfor something better.
Number four, taking small,meaningful actions consistently.
People think growth is asignificant development in their
lives, right?
But real growth is quiet, guys.
We always say that.
It's in the journaling you do atnight, it is in the boundaries
(20:28):
you set, it is in learning onenew thing.
It's about talking to yourselfwith kindness rather than
judgment.
These small actions buildmomentum.
Momentum, of course, buildchange.
Okay.
Number five, becoming aware ofyour thoughts.
Victim mindset is automatic,guys.
(20:50):
It comes from fear and oldbones.
Creator mindset is intentional,it comes from awareness.
So start noticing when yourthoughts pull you into scarcity,
doubt, or helplessness.
Okay, those thoughts are notbad.
They're just sinus, and you canchoose whether to follow them.
(21:13):
Number six, focusing on what youcan control.
You can't control the past, youyou can't control other people,
you can't control the world, butyou can control your energy, you
can control your environment,you can control your habits,
your mindset.
And focusing on these thingsturns your life from chaos into
(21:33):
direction.
Okay.
Number seven, rewriting yourinternal story.
Victims wait for the world tochange, right?
But creators build their worldfrom the inside out.
Your story is not fixed, guys.
It is not.
It's something you rewrite overand over again, every day, with
(21:56):
your actions and your beliefs.
And number eight, the last one.
Accepting that healing andprogress happen together, okay?
You don't need to be fullyhealed to take action, you don't
need to feel confident to begin.
You didn't need to, you don'tneed everything to be perfect
before you move forward.
Okay, healing is not a finishline you cross, healing happens
(22:19):
while you walk.
Your clarity grows while youtake steps, guys.
Your confidence builds while youtry, okay?
And the shift from victim tocreator is not one moment, of
course.
It takes time.
It's a decision you make againand again.
(22:40):
And every time you chooseresponsibility over blame,
action over avoidance, awarenessover autopilot, you become a
little stronger, alright?
A little wiser, a little morealigned with the life you want.
Okay.
I want you to remember somethingvery important.
(23:03):
You don't need to be perfect tostart your journey to success,
alright?
You just need to be willing, youknow, to be willing to make
small actions, willing toquestion old beliefs, willing to
be uncomfortable, willing totake responsibility, willing to
(23:23):
start small, okay, and willingto believe that something better
is possible for you.
And I promise you, the momentyou make that shift, guys, your
entire life begins to open inways you never, never imagine.
This is how you rebuildyourself, this is how you you
(23:44):
break the side the cycle, thisis how you move from victim to
creator, okay?
And this is how you startwriting the next chapter of your
life with intention and purpose.
You're not stuck, you arebecoming always.
And and and this was a littlebit on the flow.
(24:07):
I'm very proud of you, veryproud of you for taking this
step because I I also understandthis can be an intense episode
for uh for someone.
And thank you.
Thank thank you for being heretoday.
Thank you for listening, thankyou for reflecting, growing, and
taking this step with me.
(24:30):
Now I want to hear from you, asalways.
What is one moment in your lifewhen uh you realized something
had to change?
What helped?
Um, especially, what what helpedyou you shift?
Even little, you know, from uhfeeling powerless to taking your
(24:54):
power back.
Send me a message, share yourstory, or connect with me on
Substack.
I would truly love to know.
And uh because you know yourexperience might be the reminder
someone else needs today, andyou can help that person.
If you enjoyed today's episode,you know how important it is to
subscribe, guys, so you nevermiss an update.
(25:17):
But even more important issharing this episode with
someone who might be stuck intheir own cycle, okay?
Someone who could benefit fromhearing uh that they're not
alone and that change ispossible for them.
Thank you so much for being hereon Journey to Success.
Remember, together we growstronger, guys.
(25:38):
I'll see you in the nextepisode.
Cheers.
Did you know that?
On average, guys, 24 people perminute in the United States
become victims of rape, physicalviolence, stalking by an
intimate partner, and this addsup to more than 12 million women
and men over the course of asingle year, right?
(00:23):
And when we consider the rest ofthe world, we're talking about
hundreds, hundreds of millionsof people who have dealt with
such stories, unfortunately.
See, many of us, many of us haveexperienced some form of abuse,
okay, whether through bullying,family matters, abandonment,
(00:48):
psychological manipulation.
But what is the definition ofabuse at the end of the story?
There are different ways toexplain this, but generally, the
definition of abuse is themishandling of something in a
way that is harmful or morallywrong.
Okay.
(01:08):
So the question in this episodeis not whether you have been
abused, rather, it is about howyou can overcome the feelings of
darkness and oppression thatlive within you.
So, how can you move past theseexperiences to reach your goals?
Right?
Reach your goals, uh, reach yourdreams, and uh overall your true
(01:33):
purpose rather than uh living ina victim mentality.
Of course, we don't know yet,but that's what we're gonna talk
about today.
Hi guys, my name is Fabio fromJourney to Success and Welcome.
Today we introduce the conceptof the victim mentality and uh
(01:53):
its impact on personal growthand success.
Alright, and we're gonna discussalso how it can slow progress,
how it can slow relationshipsand overall happiness.
And I like the importance ofchange, but before we go
forward, as always, pleasesubscribe.
Alright, so I know this is theright direction to lead you
guys, to drive you, to guide youtowards your journey to success.
(02:19):
And let's get started, right?
As always.
So let's start from thebeginning.
First of all, when youexperience abuse, it can lead to
the development of trauma,alright?
Any type of trauma.
And the trauma itself can leadto severe conditions, all right?
(02:42):
From my own experience, I cansay that something harmful
happened to me in the past.
And one of the sad experiences II had, for example, one of one
of them was uh the victim ofbullying, which can uh lead to
trauma generally.
(03:03):
Okay.
In my case, why can lead totrauma?
Uh, for example, sometimes Ifind myself thinking about how I
would handle similar situationsdifferently than now.
You know, I don't do thisanymore because I I went
through, but I did for a longtime in my brain.
(03:26):
And but what I'm thinking rightnow, actually, is more about
how, when I have a child oneday, how we'll make sure that my
child do not have to go throughwhat I went through, you know,
talking about talking aboutbullying situations.
But something interesting aboutmyself is that have uh
(03:51):
interesting about myself and ofcourse interesting about towards
all the people who go throughtheir past traumas, is that have
chosen to shift my trauma,right?
So not to see myself as avictim, but to learn from my
past experiences.
Okay.
So for example, in this case, Idecided to start a podcast to
(04:15):
help as many people as I canthrough my journey.
And this reminds me also ofLouis Hose, you know, from the
School of Greatness, who wassexually abused and is now one
of the best podcasters in hisfield, in my opinion, of course.
So, what are the reasons behindthis?
(04:36):
Why do people seek to reach apoint where success becomes part
of overcoming their trauma?
Success can be a significantaspect of overcoming trauma
because processing it can leadto resilience, guys, can lead to
self-awareness, all right?
And of course can lead to a newsense of purpose.
(04:58):
But what happens when you cannotprocess your trauma?
What happens when you feel thatyou are not enough for the world
or the people around you?
In those cases, trauma can leadto a victim mentality and
self-sabotage as a way to managefeelings of helplessness and
(05:19):
fear of future harm.
Okay?
And this behavior can be seen asa protective response, but of
course, it is not the answer toanything you want to achieve
your life, right?
And consequently, this canhinder personal growth and
success.
So this can slow personal growthand success.
And I know someone with a victimmentality also, I know people
(05:44):
with a victim mentality, andfrom what I can see, they want
to change.
Of course they do.
But if they don't take seriouslythe fact that they are still
swimming in their trauma, allright, or that this trauma has
led to some severe conditions,then it's hard to change.
(06:05):
It's hard to make progress.
Without an inner knowledge oftheir trauma and how to go
through, it will be difficultfor them to build healthy
relationships, guys.
Okay, it will be difficult toadvance in their job and career.
It will be difficult to findhappiness and overall achieve
success in their life, right?
So living with mental, physical,and spiritual serenity is the
(06:31):
first and greatest success youcan achieve.
If you cannot achieve innerpeace, how can you expect to
achieve secondary goals likefinancial freedom, wealth
abundance, starting a family?
It is essential to address yourpersonal issues before pursuing
(06:52):
these goals, alright?
And this is the first concept Iwant you to understand.
I see so many people try to finda solution by adding more meat
to the fire to solve theirproblems, like making a child
try to fix a relationship, forexample.
(07:13):
Believing that having a childwill solve their issues, right?
Only to find themselves feelingmore broken than before.
But also many people seekwealth, right?
They want wealth, they wantmoney, thinking it will
alleviate their frustrations, orachieving your family wishes to
(07:33):
feel a sense of completenessbecause of that, you think you
are going to make them happy.
It is like using a plaster on adeep injury without cleaning or
taking the proper medications,guys.
Because of unresolved trauma,you may develop a victim
(07:53):
mentality.
You may lead you to blame othersfor your wrong actions based on
your past traumatic experiences.
Okay, you have to understandthat.
So at the end of the day, youwill find yourself victimizing
yourself because you'll gettrapped in a cycle that's hard
to break.
(08:14):
This happens because you don'twant to confront the truth,
right?
The truth is that you have toaddress past trauma first.
If you delay this process, youmay develop a condition that
requires you to acknowledge theneed for help, all right?
It is essential to understandthe origins of your trauma
(08:34):
before reaching whatever youwant to get in your life,
whatever you want to achieve inyour life.
So, how can you escape yourvictim mentality?
You can do it on your own way,of course, if your mindset is
strong enough to accept that noteverything that happens around
(08:55):
you is driven by other people,but more as a result of the
choices you make, which leads tocertain reactions, certain
reactions based on your actions.
And if you cannot acknowledgethis, you won't be able to
achieve success, alright?
Or the other alternative,acknowledging that there is
(09:20):
something wrong with thispattern, alright, that you
cannot handle on your own, andyou need to ask for help.
For over a decade, I dedicatedmyself to understanding what I
truly wanted to do with my life,all right.
(09:42):
And only now, after about 13years around, I'm beginning to
see the first results of myeffort.
Now, I'm not saying I have notbeen weak or that I have not
sometimes blamed externalfactors for the 13 years it took
me to reach my desired goal, allright.
But if I had persisted inblaming external factors for
(10:06):
slowing my progress, I wouldn'tbe here talking to you today.
You wouldn't listen to me rightnow.
So the moment you think yourprogress depends on others is
the moment you stop progressing.
Okay, you have to remember that.
It's the moment when, in mycase, personal example, I can no
longer find solutions to ensurethat even though I'm a native
(10:30):
Italian speaker, I can rise andexpress myself as I want.
Helping myself with any tool inmy package, like Google,
grammarly, you know, AI, theseresources help me articulate my
thoughts more clearly, helpingme to guide you better towards
(10:52):
your success.
Okay.
If I had told myself guys yearsago that I am Italian and that
my grammar is not as good as thenative English speaker, that's a
fact, that my accent is uh weirdcompared to other English
speakers, all right?
(11:13):
I would have set a limitation.
A limitation that would make mestop continuing with this path.
So such a mindset can slow yourprogress.
Can slow your progress, sopotentially slowing down your
progress or even blocking itentirely.
(11:34):
And of course, this way ofthinking is not the solution,
right?
The reality, guys, is that themoment you start thinking about
your limitations, it is themoment you should be focusing
more on yourself first,especially your self-esteem.
(11:54):
Yes, of course, many factors canslow down or even block your
progress, alright?
But you cannot always blameothers.
The truth is that if youpersevere, you can find
solutions, you know, to speed upagain or overcome the obstacles
that previously stopped you.
(12:15):
It's crucial to recognize thatyou have control over your
actions, guys.
Alright, so I mean, can youimagine what a sad life it would
be if we believed we didn't havecontrol over what we do?
This is the sense of a victimmentality, alright?
(12:37):
And uh I hope this exampleclarifies that for you.
So people with uh I had to drinksome water, guys.
I my throat is not that goodtoday.
But anyway, people with victimmentality often blame others and
believe without noticing thatyou know their parents,
(13:01):
relationships, friends, and soon have set untouchable limits
in their brain, creating uhmental barriers that cannot be
removed.
But if you always blame othersfor your trauma, okay, focusing
on the reactions of the people,the perceived limitation that
the people impose on you, youmay come to believe that you are
(13:24):
not responsible for your ownactions.
And without holding yourselfaccountable, the question is how
can you expect to grow andimprove?
That's the question here.
Okay.
Now, what are the main insightsor turning points that empower
(13:48):
individuals to shift from avictim mindset to a creator
mindset, right?
A mindset that is willing toreach success, any type of
success.
First, take responsibility foryour inner world.
Take responsibility for yourinner world, take responsibility
(14:09):
for your reactions, thereactions from the people, your
actions, your habits, yourchoices.
This is where personal powerbegins, all right?
Number two, change the questionyou ask yourself.
So victim usually make questionslike, Why is this happening to
me?
The creator question is morelike, What can I do with this?
(14:34):
So one question keeps you stuck,the other question moves you
forward.
Okay.
Number three, separate youridentity from your past.
You are not what happened, allright?
You are what you choose tobecome next, okay?
So this mindset shift frees youfrom repeating uh old patterns.
(14:57):
Number four, take one smallaction consistently.
Healing guys is not a big jump,all right?
It's a why it's about onedecision repeated every day.
Journaling, learning, settingboundaries, working on your
goals, speaking kindly toyourself.
Small steps build momentum.
(15:18):
Remember that.
Number five, build awareness ofyour thoughts.
The victim mindset is automatic,all right.
Creator mindset is intentional.
Start noticing thoughts like Ican't, like it's too late, like
they are stopping me.
(15:39):
These are signals, alright?
They're not truth.
Number six, focus on what youcan control.
Focus on your effort, yourmindset, your habits, your
energy, your environment.
Everything else is noise,alright.
Number seven, rewrite the storyyou tell yourself.
Victims waits, guys, waits foran opportunity that they'll
(16:04):
never come.
Creator builds, creators builds.
So change your inner narrativeand your external world begins
to shift, okay?
Number eight, the last one.
Accept that healing and progresshappen at the same time.
You know, you don't need to befully healed to start creating,
(16:26):
alright?
You only need uh willingnessbecause remember, action builds
clarity and clarity buildsconfidence, alright?
But you need to start first.
So before we wrap up, alright, Iwant to slow things down for a
(16:48):
moment.
What do we say today?
What did we talk about today?
We talk about heavy things, realthings, personal things, but
overall powerful things,alright, that are all powerful
things.
So let's take a break together.
Let's breathe together, andlet's sit with what we have
(17:11):
uncovered.
Because today, guys, wasn't justan episode only about trauma, it
wasn't not even about onlyvictim mentality or only about
success.
Today was is still an episode tomake you understand that there
is a there is a moment in yourlife where you hear a voice that
(17:33):
says enough, all right?
Enough, enough repeating all theold partners, enough letting
past experience decide yourfuture, decides for you, enough
giving your power away, okay.
That moment, that turning point,is where transformation begins,
okay?
So you need to hear that voice.
And I want to walk through thisslowly and deeply so you really
(17:56):
understand that.
When you grow up with trauma, orwhen life hits you in ways you
didn't expect, let's say in thisway, the victim mindset becomes
a kind of protection.
It feels safe to blame, it feelssafe to retreat, safe to say,
this is happening to me, youknow.
I mean, very enough.
(18:17):
It it makes sense, it's human,okay?
We understand that.
But staying there, like stayingthere keeps you small, guys.
It keeps you in survival mode,it keeps you believing that your
future is controlled by whateverhurts you are, okay?
And that's where the creatormindset becomes fundamental for
(18:38):
your journey.
Not because it ignores the past,not because it underestimates
the pain, but because it givesyou your power back.
So again, let's highlightslowly, clearly, deeply the
eight points we covered today toovercome this uh destructive
behavior that parasites yourlife.
(19:01):
All right, right.
Number one, again, takingresponsibility for your inner
world.
This is not about blamingyourself for what happened, all
right?
Remember that.
This is about reclaiming yourability to choose who you want
to be today, your reactions,your habits, your decisions.
(19:21):
This is where your the the yourreal power lives, you know.
Number two, changing thequestions you ask yourself.
The victim asks, why me?
The creator asks what now.
You know, one question keeps youfrozen, the other one uh opens a
new path.
(19:41):
Number three, separating youridentity from your past.
This one is huge, guys, becauseyou are not the trauma.
You're not the trauma, you'renot the bully, you're not the
you're not the abandonment,you're not the failures or the
mistakes.
You are the person who walkedthrough all of that.
And this person is still here,strong, stronger as as never,
(20:07):
still growing, still fightingfor something better.
Number four, taking small,meaningful actions consistently.
People think growth is asignificant development in their
lives, right?
But real growth is quiet, guys.
We always say that.
It's in the journaling you do atnight, it is in the boundaries
(20:28):
you set, it is in learning onenew thing.
It's about talking to yourselfwith kindness rather than
judgment.
These small actions buildmomentum.
Momentum, of course, buildchange.
Okay.
Number five, becoming aware ofyour thoughts.
Victim mindset is automatic,guys.
(20:50):
It comes from fear and oldbones.
Creator mindset is intentional,it comes from awareness.
So start noticing when yourthoughts pull you into scarcity,
doubt, or helplessness.
Okay, those thoughts are notbad.
They're just sinus, and you canchoose whether to follow them.
(21:13):
Number six, focusing on what youcan control.
You can't control the past, youyou can't control other people,
you can't control the world, butyou can control your energy, you
can control your environment,you can control your habits,
your mindset.
And focusing on these thingsturns your life from chaos into
(21:33):
direction.
Okay.
Number seven, rewriting yourinternal story.
Victims wait for the world tochange, right?
But creators build their worldfrom the inside out.
Your story is not fixed, guys.
It is not.
It's something you rewrite overand over again, every day, with
(21:56):
your actions and your beliefs.
And number eight, the last one.
Accepting that healing andprogress happen together, okay?
You don't need to be fullyhealed to take action, you don't
need to feel confident to begin.
You didn't need to, you don'tneed everything to be perfect
before you move forward.
Okay, healing is not a finishline you cross, healing happens
(22:19):
while you walk.
Your clarity grows while youtake steps, guys.
Your confidence builds while youtry, okay?
And the shift from victim tocreator is not one moment, of
course.
It takes time.
It's a decision you make againand again.
(22:40):
And every time you chooseresponsibility over blame,
action over avoidance, awarenessover autopilot, you become a
little stronger, alright?
A little wiser, a little morealigned with the life you want.
Okay.
I want you to remember somethingvery important.
(23:03):
You don't need to be perfect tostart your journey to success,
alright?
You just need to be willing, youknow, to be willing to make
small actions, willing toquestion old beliefs, willing to
be uncomfortable, willing totake responsibility, willing to
(23:23):
start small, okay, and willingto believe that something better
is possible for you.
And I promise you, the momentyou make that shift, guys, your
entire life begins to open inways you never, never imagine.
This is how you rebuildyourself, this is how you you
(23:44):
break the side the cycle, thisis how you move from victim to
creator, okay?
And this is how you startwriting the next chapter of your
life with intention and purpose.
You're not stuck, you arebecoming always.
And and and this was a littlebit on the flow.
(24:07):
I'm very proud of you, veryproud of you for taking this
step because I I also understandthis can be an intense episode
for uh for someone.
And thank you.
Thank thank you for being heretoday.
Thank you for listening, thankyou for reflecting, growing, and
taking this step with me.
(24:30):
Now I want to hear from you, asalways.
What is one moment in your lifewhen uh you realized something
had to change?
What helped?
Um, especially, what what helpedyou you shift?
Even little, you know, from uhfeeling powerless to taking your
(24:54):
power back.
Send me a message, share yourstory, or connect with me on
Substack.
I would truly love to know.
And uh because you know yourexperience might be the reminder
someone else needs today, andyou can help that person.
If you enjoyed today's episode,you know how important it is to
subscribe, guys, so you nevermiss an update.
(25:17):
But even more important issharing this episode with
someone who might be stuck intheir own cycle, okay?
Someone who could benefit fromhearing uh that they're not
alone and that change ispossible for them.
Thank you so much for being hereon Journey to Success.
Remember, together we growstronger, guys.
(25:38):
I'll see you in the nextepisode.
Cheers.
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