09 When Success Feels Hollow

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🎯 What to Do When Success Feels Empty | Reconnect with Meaning, Purpose, and Joy

You’ve worked hard. You’ve checked all the boxes. From the outside, your life looks successful—but inside, something still feels empty. If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Is this really it?”—you’re not alone.

In this episode, we explore why success doesn’t always feel the way you expected, what that emptiness is trying to tell you, and how to reconnect with a version of success that feels deeply fulfilling. Whether you're feeling burnt out, misaligned, or just quietly discontent, this is your invitation to pause and come home to yourself.

✅ You’ll learn:

• Why achievement alone won’t satisfy your deeper needs
• How to recognize the signs you’re out of alignment
• Five powerful steps to rediscover purpose, peace, and joy in your leadership and life

💡 This conversation is especially for high-achieving women who want more than performance—they want purpose.

💎 Download my Values Clarification Worksheet to get clear on what matters most.

👉 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share this episode with someone who needs to hear it.

Joyfully Unstoppable—helping women reconnect with what matters most.

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Want more support as you lead with clarity, confidence, and joy? Here’s how we can keep growing together:

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Episode Transcript

(00:06):
Welcome to Joyfully Unstoppable,the podcast for women who are
ready to lead boldly, livelightly, and reclaim their joy.
Whether you're leading a team, aclassroom, a boardroom, or your
own big, beautiful life, I am soglad you found us.
I'm your host, Becky Ham,leadership coach, speaker and

(00:28):
founder of Women Lead Well.
After years of high levelleadership, I discovered that
success doesn't have to come atthe cost of your peace, your
values, or your wellbeing.
Each week, we'll explore what itmeans to lead with clarity,
confidence, and authenticity.
Even in a world that tells youto hustle harder and prove your

(00:50):
worth, you carry a lot.
Let's help it feel lighter.
So.
I'm gonna make a prediction.
It's not a prediction.
I'm going to make an observationthat I think is probably true.
I think that probably you haveworked hard.

(01:11):
I think you've got the degree.
I think you landed the job.
I think you've earned thepromotion.
Maybe Justin, maybe you haveeven checked every single box on
the success checklist that youwere told would lead to
happiness.
And on the outside it looks likeyou've made it.

(01:31):
That's my hunch.
But now on the inside, theremight be a quiet ache that you
can't quite name.
The goals keep coming, you keepcrushing them, but the joy
doesn't show up.
And even when you win, even whenyou succeed, it still didn't

(01:54):
feel like enough.
It's not actually fulfilling.
Now, if that sounds familiar, myfriend, I wanna tell you, you
are not alone and you are notbroken.
This hollow feeling, that onethat whispers there has got to
be more than this.
That isn't failure.

(02:15):
It is a signal, and it is aninvitation to come home to
yourself.
And that's what we're talkingabout today.
We are exploring why success canfeel empty, what that feeling's
trying to tell you, and how torediscover a version of success
that feels soul satisfying, notjust socially approved, because

(02:38):
here's the truth, a lot of usfeel this way.
Especially those of us who havespent years trying to prove
ourselves.
So many of us, and here, myselfincluded, we keep pushing
forward, collecting accoladesand responsibilities, all while
carrying the invisible pressureto stay strong, stay grateful,

(03:01):
and stay busy.
Admitting that something feelsoff can feel like a betrayal.
It feels like you're betrayingyour hard work.
It feels like you're portrayingyour privilege the honor it is
to be in the role that you'rein.
I mean, it feels like you'reportraying the people who helped
you so much to get you where youare.
So instead you tell your things.

(03:23):
You tell yourself things like, Ishould be happy, or Maybe I'm
just tired.
Maybe it'll feel better afterthe next goal, but deep down,
something ain't adding up.
That equation of success isn'tyielding the satisfaction it
promised, and yet we often keepthis emptiness a secret right,

(03:45):
tucked behind the smiles and thepolish, and the spreadsheets,
and the perfectly curated lives.
I wanna say it plainly.
You are not ungrateful.
You're not.
You're awakening now.
Let's talk about why successalone isn't enough.
Let's talk about where thatempty feeling is coming from.

(04:08):
From the time we are young, weare fed a story, and that story
is achieve more, you'll feelmore fulfilled, work hard, and
it'll all be worth it.
Be the best, and you willfinally feel secure and seen and
satisfied.

(04:29):
But my friend, success withoutalignment will always feel
hollow when your external lifeis elevating, but your internal
life is disconnected, whenyou've built something
impressive, but it doesn'treflect you.

(04:50):
That's when the ache begins,because deep fulfillment does
not come from boxes checked ortitles earned.
It comes from living a life inharmony with who you really are,
with what matters most to youand the impact you're here to
make.
For many women, especially womenin leadership, success has been

(05:11):
tied to survival.
We strive to be twice as good,to get half as far.
We overperform, overextend,override our intuition in order
to belong and be respected, buteventually all of that effort
becomes unsustainable,especially when it's rooted in
proving instead of your actualpurpose.

(05:34):
That moment when success stopsfeeling good, that is the start
of your breakthrough.
It is a good thing to becelebrated.
So if you're feeling that I'mexcited for you, I wanna start
quickly by talking about somesigns that you're out of
alignment.
Sunday scaries, you dread Mondaymornings.

(05:55):
Even in the role you oncedreamed of.
Number two, you are constantlyexhausted, not because the work
itself is so hard.
But because of the effort ittakes to keep performing a life
that no longer feels true.
Number three, you keep achievingbecause you're amazing, but you

(06:18):
feel numb.
After each win, you wonder toyourself, is this really it?
And then you feel guilty foreven ask, even asking a
question.
These signs are the indicationthat you've grown.
These signs are the indicationthat you are ready for more, for

(06:39):
something that's deeper, forsomething that is more
authentically you.
So sweet friend, what should youdo when success feels empty,
when you have the Sundayscaries, when you have that
numbness inside?
Well, the first step is to stopsilencing the discomfort and

(06:59):
start listening to it.
Instead of brushing past yourfeelings, labeling them as
selfish or ungrateful ordismissing them as well.
I'm just tired.
It, uh, I just need some sleep,and it'll slow down.
Right?
No.
Allow yourself to get curiouswhat exactly feels off right
now.

(07:19):
Where do I feel disconnected ordisoriented?
Or disillusioned?
Let yourself acknowledge thetension.
Without immediately trying tofix it and without judging it,
curiosity, not judgment.
I know for a lot of us, we skipthis part'cause we're afraid of

(07:39):
what we're gonna find out.
It's uncomfortable to reallyscratch the surface, but naming
the truth is the beginning offreedom.
You don't need all the answersright away.
Simply honoring your emotionswithout judgment opens the door
to healing and clarity.
So.
I want you to do it.
Set time aside to reflect,journal, your honest response.

(08:05):
You can ask yourself thisquestion, even though I've been
successful, I still feel, takefive minutes today and just
answer that question foryourself and don't censor
yourself.
Let the truth come out, even ifit surprises you, there's wisdom
there in what you uncover next.
I want you to take some time toreconnect with what matters most

(08:28):
to you.
When your outer life lookssuccessful, but your inner life
feels hollow, that's oftenbecause your choices have
drifted out of alignment withyour core values.
You may have been moving so fastfor so long that you haven't had
time to ask yourself.
What really matters to you nowin this specific season of your
life?
Success without meaning italways leads a void.

(08:50):
So.
Reflect on when you feel mostlike yourself.
What brings you peace?
What ignites your curiosity oryour joy?
When do you feel energized,engaged, alive?
These are clues to your valuesand that anchors to a life that
feels fulfilling.

(09:10):
I'll link my valuesclarification exercise in the
show notes to help you reallyclarify your core values.
And as you do that, then yougotta ask the question.
How fully am I living thesevalues right now with curiosity,
not judgment.
And if the answer is I'm not,that is okay, we're gonna get
there.

(09:32):
After that, it's time toredefine success on your own
terms.
One of the most liberatingthings you can do is stop
chasing someone else's versionof success and begin creating
your own.
So many women spend yearspursuing a success story that
someone else wrote for them, andit may have gotten you far

(09:55):
right?
You may be super successfulright now, but if it doesn't
fit, it is okay to let it go.
Ask yourself, if I weren'ttrying to impress anyone or
prove anything, what would Iwant?
What would success look like ifit reflected my soul?

(10:15):
Not just my resume.
You get to decide what ameaningful, satisfying life
looks like, because real successis not about what you achieve,
it's about what you value, howyou feel, and who you are Now.
Once you've done all that, yougotta create some space for

(10:35):
truth to surface.
You can't hear your own wisdomif you're always drowning in
noise.
And busyness is something thatwe do to ourselves to keep us
from having the space for thatreflection.
'cause we're scared about whatwe might hear.
But clarity does not come frommore hustle.
It comes from space when everymoment of your day is packed

(10:56):
with meetings, notifications,responsibilities, there is no
room for deeper truths toemerge.
You need quiet, not justsilence, but internal stillness
inside of you.
I've mentioned journaling,right?
Answering that question.
You might find that internalstillness through journaling,

(11:16):
just letting your mind out in away that is unforced.
You might find it through earlymorning solitude, A long walk
without your phone.
Or even, I mean, keep your phonewith you for safety reasons, but
turn it off, silence it.
Just have it there for anemergency safety first.
This reflection could just comesitting with a cup of coffee and

(11:40):
letting your mind wander.
The point isn't to force anyinsight, right?
Like we're past that.
We're, we're out of our force itphase in life.
The point is to allow your innerknowing that intuition, you know
what is best for you.
You do, I promise.
Let it catch up with your outerpace.

(12:01):
And then finally, I want you togive yourself permission to
evolve.
you don't owe anyone consistencywith an outdated version of
yourself.
Just because something once madesense for you, just because a
job used to fit just because itwas a dream, just because it was
a role that used to fulfill you.
That doesn't mean it always is.

(12:21):
You are allowed to grow.
You're allowed to shift.
You're allowed to want somethingdifferent for yourself.
So ask yourself, what am I nolonger willing to pretend is
working?
And what would it look like tohonor that truth?
You don't have to throw awayeverything you've built.
This is not about burning it alldown.

(12:42):
You simply get to build forwardin a way that's more aligned
with you, more joyful in a waythat is more you.
And here is my promise.
When you stop leading from aplace of performance and start
leading from a place ofpresence, everything changes.

(13:03):
You begin to trust yourselfmore.
You stop chasing things andstart choosing the things that
are truly meant for you.
You lead with joy, and yourleadership becomes a reflection
of who you truly are, not whothe world told you to be.
Now this shift doesn't mean youa abandon ambition quite the

(13:24):
opposite.
It means you anchor yourambition in authenticity, and
that is where the most powerful,sustainable, soul nourishing
leadership is born.
You'll be so much moreeffective.
You will crush such bigger goalsthis way, in a way that is
joyful, sustainable, andauthentic because it is grounded

(13:45):
in your truth.
So.
If success feels empty to you,that doesn't mean you've made a
wrong turn.
It just means you've reached theedge of someone else's
definition and you're ready toright your own.
Because you weren't meant tolive someone else's version of a
successful life.

(14:05):
You were made to live yours withjoy and clarity and deep
fulfillment.
Now friends, if this episodespoke to you, I would love for
you to share it with someonewho's running on empty.
We need more women leading fromalignment, not adrenaline.
And if you're ready to beginyour burnout recovery journey,

(14:28):
join the wait list for Franticto Flourishing.
I've linked it in the show notesfor you.
Make sure you're on that emaillist so you don't miss the
launch.
Remember, joyful, sustainable,and authentic leadership is
possible.
Until next time, I'm Becky Ham,and this is joyfully
Unstoppable.