August 5, 2025 • 19 mins
Feeling Overwhelmed? Here’s What to Do | Joyfully Unstoppable Podcast
Do you ever feel like you're carrying too much—but don’t know how to set it down?
In this episode of Joyfully Unstoppable, we’re talking about what to do when you feel overwhelmed—especially if you're the kind of woman others count on. If you're a high-achieving, overextended leader who's always juggling too much, this conversation is for you.
You’ll learn:
✨ Why overwhelm isn’t a personal failure—it’s a leadership signal
✨ How to regulate your nervous system when you feel maxed out
✨ The mindset shift that makes decision-making easier
✨ Practical strategies to reset your energy, set boundaries, and anchor yourself in calm
✨ Why you don’t have to do it all alone
If you’re ready to lead with more clarity, peace, and purpose—even in the middle of the mess—this episode will help you take your next right step.
Joyfully Unstoppable—helping women reconnect with what matters most.
Subscribe so you never miss an episode!
✨ Let’s stay connected
Want more support as you lead with clarity, confidence, and joy? Here’s how we can keep growing together:
📝 Download the Burnout Recovery Checklist!
👩🏽🤝👩🏾 Join the Women Lead Well Community on Facebook!
📋 Join the Waitlist for Frantic to Flourishing!
🌿 Meet Becky – Get to know the heart behind the mic
💼 Coaching for Women Leaders – Ready for personalized support? Explore 1:1 coaching
📚 Free Leadership Resources – Practical tools to help you lead (and live) well
🏡 Explore Women Lead Well – Learn more about Women Lead Well and everything we offer
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:05):
Welcome to Joyfully Unstoppable,the podcast for women who are
ready to lead boldly, livelightly, and reclaim their joy.
Whether you're leading a team, aclassroom, a boardroom, or your
own big, beautiful life, I am soglad you found us.
I'm your host, Becky Hammmleadership coach, speaker and
(00:25):
founder of Women Lead Well.
After years of high levelleadership, I discovered that
success doesn't have to come atthe cost of your peace, your
values, or your wellbeing.
Each week we'll explore what itmeans to lead with clarity,
confidence, and authenticity.
Even in a world that tells youto hustle harder and prove your
(00:46):
worth, you carry a lot.
Let's help it feel lighter Now,friends, you are smart, you are
capable.
You are the kind of woman thatothers count on.
(01:07):
And yet still, I guarantee thereare days when you feel
overwhelmed.
The mental load, the emotionalexhaustion, the pressure to do
it all and to do it perfectly.
If that sounds familiar, mysweet friend.
You are not alone.
In fact, it is way more commonthan most of us realize because
(01:31):
most of us feel overwhelmed.
There's something about thisyear, 2025 is.
Insane.
So many of us are just at theedge of our rope, and so I just
wanna tell you, if nothing else,like if you could turn off the
podcast here in 30 seconds, butI just want you to know that
feeling overwhelmed, that is nota sign that you're failing.
(01:52):
It's not a sign that you can'thold it all together, that you
aren't strong enough.
The universe is just likefreaking out right now, and
everything is just hard.
So that overwhelm.
That is a signal, that isinformation that is something
for us to get curious about.
Not judgmental.
That's just telling us thatsomething is out of alignment.
(02:13):
Right?
That, Instead of being groundedin ourselves in our strength and
our values and our priorities,that we have externalized our
center of gravity, right?
And our center of gravity hasshifted from us to the to-do
list and the responsibilitiesand other people's expectations.
And that's good because youdon't have to stay there.
(02:37):
You can bring that center ofgravity, you can bring your core
back to you.
And so this is what I want youto know as a leadership coach
who helps women lead joyfully,sustainably, and authentically,
I want you to know that feelingoverwhelmed does not mean that
you're broken.
It just means that you'reoverloaded.
It just means that you'veshifted your core outside of
(02:59):
yourself and you don't have tostay there.
So let's walk through ittogether.
we're gonna talk about what itmeans to feel overwhelmed, and
then the steps that you can taketo bring yourself back.
When you feel overwhelmed, yourbrain and your body are talking,
right?
They're trying to protect you.
We've talked about body budgetin a previous episode.
(03:21):
I'll remember, I'll try toremember to link it in the show
notes below in case you haven'theard that one.
It's a great episode.
Um, I think it's episode six orseven.
I forget, but your brain, yourbody has one job and that is
keep your happy self alive.
And so.
It's going to, when it starts tofeel, you've got inputs that you
(03:44):
put into your body budget, andthat would be rest and
nutritional food and healthymovement and energizing
relationships and connections.
And then you've got things thatdrain your body budget, right?
The, the expenditures outta yourbody budget, that would be poor
sleep, living off a caffeine orfood that is not nutrient dense.
(04:05):
That would be the relationshipsand the activities that drain
your energy.
When you've got more going outthan you've got coming in, more
expenditures than deposits, yourbrain shifts into survival mode.
And it is gonna protect likeyour liver function and your
blood flow before it protectsyour executive function.
(04:27):
Right?
And your ability to multitaskand your memory.
I mean, it'll keep the memory tonot get you killed, but the
memory of what is that thingthat Tommy said last week that I
need to remember for Project X?
No, it's gone because your mindis trying to keep you alive and
there's more going out.
Than there is coming in.
You've shifted.
(04:47):
The body has shifted intosurvival mode, into scarcity,
and so that's all that means.
When you're feeling overwhelmed,when it's all too much, it's
your brain and your body tryingto protect you.
The demands on you exceed yourcurrent capacity.
Maybe that's mentally,emotionally, physically.
Maybe it's all three.
And what do we tend to do ashigh achieving women when that
(05:10):
happens?
When we hit that overwhelm, wetend to ignore the signals.
Right, because we've been taughtto equate success with
self-sacrifice, and so we pushthrough, we continue to
over-function, we disconnectfrom our needs.
How many times have you workedthrough a day and missed lunch?
Hi.
I do it all the time.
I used to do it all the time.
(05:30):
I don't do it anymore.
I would skip breakfast.
Now I've committed.
I make myself a hot breakfastevery morning.
It's a good life.
But there is this habit, andmany of us have fallen for this
habit.
We have followed this habit fordecades that we alienate
ourselves from our own bodies,from our own physical,
(05:53):
emotional, mental needs, becausewe're strong.
Right.
We can push through enough timeto sleep when we're dead.
Did you remember saying thatmaybe when you were in your
twenties or going through gradschool or whatever, the truth is
that constantly overriding ourbody, constantly draining the
body budget with no inputs thatcatches up with us.
(06:16):
That explains the headaches, theirritability, the late night
overthinking when you can't goto sleep.
That brain that keeps spinning.
That tight feeling in your chestor that ache in your neck and
your back.
That's your body telling youthat you are at your limit.
And yes, you are a superstar.
Yes, you are amazing.
Yes, you are phenomenal, butyour actual body needs actual
(06:42):
support.
And I'm emphasizing that becauserecognizing that real root of
overwhelm, that's the first steptoward reclaiming.
Your clarity reclaiming yourpiece.
That's the first step towardmore deposits than expenditures.
So before you do anything else,I want you to pause If you are
(07:06):
feeling overwhelmed, or the nexttime you find yourself feeling
overwhelmed, pause.
Step number one is regulate yournervous system and signal safety
in your body.
How do you do that?
That might mean taking a fewslow, deep breaths.
Breathe in through your nose,hold at the top, breathe out
(07:28):
through your mouth.
If you catch yourself yawningwhen you're doing that, that's
great.
That means your nervous systemis regulating.
It's exactly what you want, andyou can do that deep breathing
anywhere.
You don't have to be in private.
You can do a deep breathingexercise in a team meeting,
right?
You can do that anywhere.
You can regulate your nervoussystem, signal safety to your
(07:50):
body anywhere.
If you have the opportunity orthe where, depending on where
you are.
Step outside.
Get a little vitamin D on yourskin.
Touch grass, put your hand on atree, whatever that is.
Feel the wind on your face ifyou can.
You can put your hand on yourheart, you can put a hand on
(08:11):
your belly.
All of that signals safety toyour body.
Give your nervous system achance to settle down.
That is always step one beforeyou do anything.
I teach my clients this all thetime before any action or
reaction.
Step one, regulate the nervoussystem.
(08:32):
And I know this might feelcounterintuitive because if your
mind is spinning, you wanna getstuck in your mind, right?
Let me think through how I cansolve this problem.
Me think through what I can getdone so I don't feel this way
anymore.
Right?
You, you try to get in our, andwe are so.
Um, stuck in our brains anywayas Americans in this particular
period of history.
So it can feel counterintuitiveto try to get outta your mind
(08:54):
and into your body, but I amtelling you, my friend, get
outta your mind.
Get into your body.
Regulate that nervous systemsignal, clear, serious safety in
your body.
You wouldn't fix a car whileit's overheating.
The same goes with you regulateyour body.
(09:15):
When you do that, that givesyour brain the clarity it needs
to think and prioritize and leadwith intention.
So regulating your nervoussystem, always step one.
Now you've done that.
Great.
Yay.
Let's talk about step two.
Now it's time to clear yourmind.
Overwhelm thrives in chaos.
(09:37):
Right?
That's, that's what lives in ourhead.
That's the inner, that's all ofthe stuff, all of those, uh,
mental tabs that are open,right?
The mental load.
And then in addition, we've gotthat super helpful inner critic
in the back who's just like me,me, me, me, me on every decision
that we take or every task thatwe don't finish, all of that.
It just sits there and churnsthe emails.
(10:00):
We haven't answered the unspokenexpectations that we have or
that it feels like other peoplehave for us.
All of that is what we callmental load.
So write it all down.
Get it outta your brain.
Get it on paper.
I don't want you to censor it.
I'm not asking you to organizeit.
We'll get to that later rightnow.
Just get it out.
The brain dump doesn't have tobe pretty, it just has to be
(10:23):
honest.
Get it all there on a sheet ofpaper or if a Google Doc,
whatever works for you, I'lllink my mental load reset in the
show notes.
It's designed to help you withthis process and so lay it all
down.
Once you've got everything out,Take a look.
What on this list is urgent?
What on this list is important?
(10:45):
What is just noise?
What's somebody else's priority?
Getting clarity on why you feeloverwhelmed is what makes it
possible to take alignedeffective action.
And here is where things startto shift.
When you feel overwhelmed, it'seasy to believe that everything
matters equally because they'reall just open tabs in your
(11:07):
brain, right?
And one tab doesn't seem biggerthan they're all there and it's
crowded and it's making noise,but it is rarely true that they
are all equally important.
Overwhelm isn't just abouthaving too much to do, it's
about feeling disconnected fromwhat matters most, right?
It's about feeling disconnectedfrom that meaning, so you get it
(11:30):
all out on paper.
You figure out what's urgent,what's important, what ain't
right.
Pause and ask yourself whatactually deserves my energy
right now?
And sometimes that answer is adeadline.
Something is urgent and you dohave to get it knocked out.
Sometimes it's rest, sometimes,and we're gonna dig into this in
(11:53):
a second.
It's setting a boundary, lettinggo of something that no longer
fits.
It is a.
I, I talk in other places andyou'll see it, I think it's in
the mental load, reset the ditchdelegate delay, and do model
some of this stuff.
You can just ditch close the tabwithout remorse.
And so this is a great moment toreturn to your core values.
(12:14):
Because when you reconnect withwhat matters to you, beyond the
noise, beyond the roles, beyondthe expectations, you start to
see what you can ditch, what youcan delegate, delegation as a
leadership tool, what you candelay, just not do right now.
You got it on paper, so you'renot gonna forget, right?
But you don't have to deal withit now, or what actually needs
to get done, what you need tospend your time and energy on
(12:37):
today.
One of the most empoweringthings you can do when you feel
overwhelmed is stop trying to doeverything so that you can focus
on doing the right thing.
And that means you gotta leteverything else go.
So once you've taken care ofeverything that's contributing
to your overwhelm, you've got itoutta your head and onto paper.
(12:59):
You've held those tasks andobligations up against your
values.
Now it's time to set someboundaries, and I know.
I know a lot of us don't likeboundaries.
It feels scary, but boundariesdon't actually alienate you from
people.
Boundaries are not walls.
People talk about'em that way,but it's not true.
Good boundaries let other peopleknow how to connect well with
(13:22):
you.
Boundaries strengthenrelationships because they
establish relationships thatactually work for everyone
involved.
That includes you.
Where you need a boundary, butyou don't have it, that
relationship is actuallydysfunctional.
That relationship ain't workingfor you, right?
(13:42):
So boundaries are instructionmanuals.
You're teaching someone how tointeract with you in a way that
benefits both of you.
They help healthy relationships.
And when you feel overwhelmed,even tiny boundaries can bring
immediate relief.
Turn off your notifications.
(14:03):
Block a focus hour on yourcalendar.
Tell someone, let me get back toyou on that.
Don't commit in the mo.
Never commit in the moment.
Always say, let me get back toyou on that.
Log off at a reasonable hour.
Eat lunch away from your laptop.
I know the resistance to settingboundaries comes from fear.
(14:25):
You're afraid of disappointingother people, of missing out
seeing, being unhelpful.
But effective leadershiprequires sustainability, and
sustainability requiresboundaries.
Remember, you are allowed toprotect your peace.
Micro boundaries help youreclaim your power in small ways
(14:48):
every day.
So.
Now it gets good.
You have everything out of yourbrain.
You've identified what alignswith your values and what
doesn't.
You've put some boundaries inplace.
You've done the ditch.
Delegate delay, do.
Next, I want you to create ananchor.
Think of your anchors as like atiny little ritual that brings
(15:10):
you back to center.
I had talked about overwhelmbecause you've shifted your
center of gravity, you'veshifted your core outside of
yourself onto the to-do list andthe responsibilities and the
other people's expectations.
This anchor brings you back toyourself, and I don't want it to
be fancy.
I'm talking about like a threeminute morning check-in.
(15:33):
I'm talking about.
Some deep breathing at your deskbefore you open your email.
I'm talking about a journalprompt before you go to bed,
where you identify the threethings you're grateful for in
the day.
It might be a stretch and areset between meetings.
I don't want it to be elaborate,it just needs to be consistent.
(15:56):
Something that works for you.
So experiment, figure out whatworks best for you, what brings
you back to yourself to thatfeeling of safety in your body.
These small practices, thoseanchors help you build trust
with yourself.
They send a signal to yournervous system that I'm safe,
I'm in charge.
I got this.
(16:16):
And when everything feels likeit's swirling, your anchor
routine brings you back to solidground.
And now finally, I want you toremember that you don't have to
do any of this alone.
Here's something a lot of womenleaders won't admit out out.
(16:37):
Sometimes we feel ashamed forfeeling overwhelmed.
We think I should have ittogether by now, I should be
able to handle this.
But leadership doesn't meandoing it all alone.
It never did.
You are allowed to need support.
Whether that's a therapist, acoach, a mentor, a friend, you
do not have to carry everythingby yourself.
(16:59):
And frankly, as humans, wearen't meant to carry everything
by ourselves.
We are inherently communalcreatures.
So tap into those connectionsthat feed you.
This is not the time to tap intoconnection with folks who drain
you, but tap into thatconnection with people who feed
you and let that connectionremind you that you are safe.
(17:20):
And you are fully capable ofhandling your responsibilities.
So I wanna end where I startedand tell you that feeling
overwhelmed does not mean thatyou failed.
It means you're being calledback to your body, to your
values, to your humanity.
You shifted your center ofgravity from yourself and your
(17:40):
strength to do things outside ofyourself.
The to-do list and theresponsibilities, right, became
more important.
But this moment of overwhelm,then that's a moment, an
invitation to realign, to bringyour center back to you.
So take it.
You carry a lot, but you do nothave to carry it all.
(18:04):
If you are ready to move fromsurvival mode to a more soul
aligned way of leading, I wouldlove to walk alongside you maybe
with, that's with one-to-Onecoaching.
So please check out on thewebsite, uh, the coaching
opportunities that areavailable.
And then also my 12 weekprogram, frantic to Flourishing
is designed to help womenreconnect with their values,
(18:25):
their voice, and their vision,so you can lead with confidence
and joy without burning out orbetraying yourself.
And I'm offering that programbecause you deserve to feel good
in the life that you have workedso hard to build.
If that sounds like it could besupportive to you, I'm inviting
you to join the wait list that'sat Women Lead
(18:45):
well.net/flourishing.
So you'll be first in line whendoors open later this summer.
And if this episode spoke toyou, I would love for you to
share it with a friend who'srunning on empty.
We need more women leading fromalignment, not adrenaline.
You can also grab one of ourfree resources like the Mental
(19:05):
Load Reset or the Valuesclarification
exercise@womenleadwell.netlinked in the show notes below.
Remember, joyful, sustainable,and authentic leadership is
possible.
You deserve to enjoy everyminute of it.
Until next time, I'm BeckyHammm.
(19:26):
And this is joyfullyunstoppable.
Okay.
Welcome to Joyfully Unstoppable,the podcast for women who are
ready to lead boldly, livelightly, and reclaim their joy.
Whether you're leading a team, aclassroom, a boardroom, or your
own big, beautiful life, I am soglad you found us.
I'm your host, Becky Hammmleadership coach, speaker and
(00:25):
founder of Women Lead Well.
After years of high levelleadership, I discovered that
success doesn't have to come atthe cost of your peace, your
values, or your wellbeing.
Each week we'll explore what itmeans to lead with clarity,
confidence, and authenticity.
Even in a world that tells youto hustle harder and prove your
(00:46):
worth, you carry a lot.
Let's help it feel lighter Now,friends, you are smart, you are
capable.
You are the kind of woman thatothers count on.
(01:07):
And yet still, I guarantee thereare days when you feel
overwhelmed.
The mental load, the emotionalexhaustion, the pressure to do
it all and to do it perfectly.
If that sounds familiar, mysweet friend.
You are not alone.
In fact, it is way more commonthan most of us realize because
(01:31):
most of us feel overwhelmed.
There's something about thisyear, 2025 is.
Insane.
So many of us are just at theedge of our rope, and so I just
wanna tell you, if nothing else,like if you could turn off the
podcast here in 30 seconds, butI just want you to know that
feeling overwhelmed, that is nota sign that you're failing.
(01:52):
It's not a sign that you can'thold it all together, that you
aren't strong enough.
The universe is just likefreaking out right now, and
everything is just hard.
So that overwhelm.
That is a signal, that isinformation that is something
for us to get curious about.
Not judgmental.
That's just telling us thatsomething is out of alignment.
(02:13):
Right?
That, Instead of being groundedin ourselves in our strength and
our values and our priorities,that we have externalized our
center of gravity, right?
And our center of gravity hasshifted from us to the to-do
list and the responsibilitiesand other people's expectations.
And that's good because youdon't have to stay there.
(02:37):
You can bring that center ofgravity, you can bring your core
back to you.
And so this is what I want youto know as a leadership coach
who helps women lead joyfully,sustainably, and authentically,
I want you to know that feelingoverwhelmed does not mean that
you're broken.
It just means that you'reoverloaded.
It just means that you'veshifted your core outside of
(02:59):
yourself and you don't have tostay there.
So let's walk through ittogether.
we're gonna talk about what itmeans to feel overwhelmed, and
then the steps that you can taketo bring yourself back.
When you feel overwhelmed, yourbrain and your body are talking,
right?
They're trying to protect you.
We've talked about body budgetin a previous episode.
(03:21):
I'll remember, I'll try toremember to link it in the show
notes below in case you haven'theard that one.
It's a great episode.
Um, I think it's episode six orseven.
I forget, but your brain, yourbody has one job and that is
keep your happy self alive.
And so.
It's going to, when it starts tofeel, you've got inputs that you
(03:44):
put into your body budget, andthat would be rest and
nutritional food and healthymovement and energizing
relationships and connections.
And then you've got things thatdrain your body budget, right?
The, the expenditures outta yourbody budget, that would be poor
sleep, living off a caffeine orfood that is not nutrient dense.
(04:05):
That would be the relationshipsand the activities that drain
your energy.
When you've got more going outthan you've got coming in, more
expenditures than deposits, yourbrain shifts into survival mode.
And it is gonna protect likeyour liver function and your
blood flow before it protectsyour executive function.
(04:27):
Right?
And your ability to multitaskand your memory.
I mean, it'll keep the memory tonot get you killed, but the
memory of what is that thingthat Tommy said last week that I
need to remember for Project X?
No, it's gone because your mindis trying to keep you alive and
there's more going out.
Than there is coming in.
You've shifted.
(04:47):
The body has shifted intosurvival mode, into scarcity,
and so that's all that means.
When you're feeling overwhelmed,when it's all too much, it's
your brain and your body tryingto protect you.
The demands on you exceed yourcurrent capacity.
Maybe that's mentally,emotionally, physically.
Maybe it's all three.
And what do we tend to do ashigh achieving women when that
(05:10):
happens?
When we hit that overwhelm, wetend to ignore the signals.
Right, because we've been taughtto equate success with
self-sacrifice, and so we pushthrough, we continue to
over-function, we disconnectfrom our needs.
How many times have you workedthrough a day and missed lunch?
Hi.
I do it all the time.
I used to do it all the time.
(05:30):
I don't do it anymore.
I would skip breakfast.
Now I've committed.
I make myself a hot breakfastevery morning.
It's a good life.
But there is this habit, andmany of us have fallen for this
habit.
We have followed this habit fordecades that we alienate
ourselves from our own bodies,from our own physical,
(05:53):
emotional, mental needs, becausewe're strong.
Right.
We can push through enough timeto sleep when we're dead.
Did you remember saying thatmaybe when you were in your
twenties or going through gradschool or whatever, the truth is
that constantly overriding ourbody, constantly draining the
body budget with no inputs thatcatches up with us.
(06:16):
That explains the headaches, theirritability, the late night
overthinking when you can't goto sleep.
That brain that keeps spinning.
That tight feeling in your chestor that ache in your neck and
your back.
That's your body telling youthat you are at your limit.
And yes, you are a superstar.
Yes, you are amazing.
Yes, you are phenomenal, butyour actual body needs actual
(06:42):
support.
And I'm emphasizing that becauserecognizing that real root of
overwhelm, that's the first steptoward reclaiming.
Your clarity reclaiming yourpiece.
That's the first step towardmore deposits than expenditures.
So before you do anything else,I want you to pause If you are
(07:06):
feeling overwhelmed, or the nexttime you find yourself feeling
overwhelmed, pause.
Step number one is regulate yournervous system and signal safety
in your body.
How do you do that?
That might mean taking a fewslow, deep breaths.
Breathe in through your nose,hold at the top, breathe out
(07:28):
through your mouth.
If you catch yourself yawningwhen you're doing that, that's
great.
That means your nervous systemis regulating.
It's exactly what you want, andyou can do that deep breathing
anywhere.
You don't have to be in private.
You can do a deep breathingexercise in a team meeting,
right?
You can do that anywhere.
You can regulate your nervoussystem, signal safety to your
(07:50):
body anywhere.
If you have the opportunity orthe where, depending on where
you are.
Step outside.
Get a little vitamin D on yourskin.
Touch grass, put your hand on atree, whatever that is.
Feel the wind on your face ifyou can.
You can put your hand on yourheart, you can put a hand on
(08:11):
your belly.
All of that signals safety toyour body.
Give your nervous system achance to settle down.
That is always step one beforeyou do anything.
I teach my clients this all thetime before any action or
reaction.
Step one, regulate the nervoussystem.
(08:32):
And I know this might feelcounterintuitive because if your
mind is spinning, you wanna getstuck in your mind, right?
Let me think through how I cansolve this problem.
Me think through what I can getdone so I don't feel this way
anymore.
Right?
You, you try to get in our, andwe are so.
Um, stuck in our brains anywayas Americans in this particular
period of history.
So it can feel counterintuitiveto try to get outta your mind
(08:54):
and into your body, but I amtelling you, my friend, get
outta your mind.
Get into your body.
Regulate that nervous systemsignal, clear, serious safety in
your body.
You wouldn't fix a car whileit's overheating.
The same goes with you regulateyour body.
(09:15):
When you do that, that givesyour brain the clarity it needs
to think and prioritize and leadwith intention.
So regulating your nervoussystem, always step one.
Now you've done that.
Great.
Yay.
Let's talk about step two.
Now it's time to clear yourmind.
Overwhelm thrives in chaos.
(09:37):
Right?
That's, that's what lives in ourhead.
That's the inner, that's all ofthe stuff, all of those, uh,
mental tabs that are open,right?
The mental load.
And then in addition, we've gotthat super helpful inner critic
in the back who's just like me,me, me, me, me on every decision
that we take or every task thatwe don't finish, all of that.
It just sits there and churnsthe emails.
(10:00):
We haven't answered the unspokenexpectations that we have or
that it feels like other peoplehave for us.
All of that is what we callmental load.
So write it all down.
Get it outta your brain.
Get it on paper.
I don't want you to censor it.
I'm not asking you to organizeit.
We'll get to that later rightnow.
Just get it out.
The brain dump doesn't have tobe pretty, it just has to be
(10:23):
honest.
Get it all there on a sheet ofpaper or if a Google Doc,
whatever works for you, I'lllink my mental load reset in the
show notes.
It's designed to help you withthis process and so lay it all
down.
Once you've got everything out,Take a look.
What on this list is urgent?
What on this list is important?
(10:45):
What is just noise?
What's somebody else's priority?
Getting clarity on why you feeloverwhelmed is what makes it
possible to take alignedeffective action.
And here is where things startto shift.
When you feel overwhelmed, it'seasy to believe that everything
matters equally because they'reall just open tabs in your
(11:07):
brain, right?
And one tab doesn't seem biggerthan they're all there and it's
crowded and it's making noise,but it is rarely true that they
are all equally important.
Overwhelm isn't just abouthaving too much to do, it's
about feeling disconnected fromwhat matters most, right?
It's about feeling disconnectedfrom that meaning, so you get it
(11:30):
all out on paper.
You figure out what's urgent,what's important, what ain't
right.
Pause and ask yourself whatactually deserves my energy
right now?
And sometimes that answer is adeadline.
Something is urgent and you dohave to get it knocked out.
Sometimes it's rest, sometimes,and we're gonna dig into this in
(11:53):
a second.
It's setting a boundary, lettinggo of something that no longer
fits.
It is a.
I, I talk in other places andyou'll see it, I think it's in
the mental load, reset the ditchdelegate delay, and do model
some of this stuff.
You can just ditch close the tabwithout remorse.
And so this is a great moment toreturn to your core values.
(12:14):
Because when you reconnect withwhat matters to you, beyond the
noise, beyond the roles, beyondthe expectations, you start to
see what you can ditch, what youcan delegate, delegation as a
leadership tool, what you candelay, just not do right now.
You got it on paper, so you'renot gonna forget, right?
But you don't have to deal withit now, or what actually needs
to get done, what you need tospend your time and energy on
(12:37):
today.
One of the most empoweringthings you can do when you feel
overwhelmed is stop trying to doeverything so that you can focus
on doing the right thing.
And that means you gotta leteverything else go.
So once you've taken care ofeverything that's contributing
to your overwhelm, you've got itoutta your head and onto paper.
(12:59):
You've held those tasks andobligations up against your
values.
Now it's time to set someboundaries, and I know.
I know a lot of us don't likeboundaries.
It feels scary, but boundariesdon't actually alienate you from
people.
Boundaries are not walls.
People talk about'em that way,but it's not true.
Good boundaries let other peopleknow how to connect well with
(13:22):
you.
Boundaries strengthenrelationships because they
establish relationships thatactually work for everyone
involved.
That includes you.
Where you need a boundary, butyou don't have it, that
relationship is actuallydysfunctional.
That relationship ain't workingfor you, right?
(13:42):
So boundaries are instructionmanuals.
You're teaching someone how tointeract with you in a way that
benefits both of you.
They help healthy relationships.
And when you feel overwhelmed,even tiny boundaries can bring
immediate relief.
Turn off your notifications.
(14:03):
Block a focus hour on yourcalendar.
Tell someone, let me get back toyou on that.
Don't commit in the mo.
Never commit in the moment.
Always say, let me get back toyou on that.
Log off at a reasonable hour.
Eat lunch away from your laptop.
I know the resistance to settingboundaries comes from fear.
(14:25):
You're afraid of disappointingother people, of missing out
seeing, being unhelpful.
But effective leadershiprequires sustainability, and
sustainability requiresboundaries.
Remember, you are allowed toprotect your peace.
Micro boundaries help youreclaim your power in small ways
(14:48):
every day.
So.
Now it gets good.
You have everything out of yourbrain.
You've identified what alignswith your values and what
doesn't.
You've put some boundaries inplace.
You've done the ditch.
Delegate delay, do.
Next, I want you to create ananchor.
Think of your anchors as like atiny little ritual that brings
(15:10):
you back to center.
I had talked about overwhelmbecause you've shifted your
center of gravity, you'veshifted your core outside of
yourself onto the to-do list andthe responsibilities and the
other people's expectations.
This anchor brings you back toyourself, and I don't want it to
be fancy.
I'm talking about like a threeminute morning check-in.
(15:33):
I'm talking about.
Some deep breathing at your deskbefore you open your email.
I'm talking about a journalprompt before you go to bed,
where you identify the threethings you're grateful for in
the day.
It might be a stretch and areset between meetings.
I don't want it to be elaborate,it just needs to be consistent.
(15:56):
Something that works for you.
So experiment, figure out whatworks best for you, what brings
you back to yourself to thatfeeling of safety in your body.
These small practices, thoseanchors help you build trust
with yourself.
They send a signal to yournervous system that I'm safe,
I'm in charge.
I got this.
(16:16):
And when everything feels likeit's swirling, your anchor
routine brings you back to solidground.
And now finally, I want you toremember that you don't have to
do any of this alone.
Here's something a lot of womenleaders won't admit out out.
(16:37):
Sometimes we feel ashamed forfeeling overwhelmed.
We think I should have ittogether by now, I should be
able to handle this.
But leadership doesn't meandoing it all alone.
It never did.
You are allowed to need support.
Whether that's a therapist, acoach, a mentor, a friend, you
do not have to carry everythingby yourself.
(16:59):
And frankly, as humans, wearen't meant to carry everything
by ourselves.
We are inherently communalcreatures.
So tap into those connectionsthat feed you.
This is not the time to tap intoconnection with folks who drain
you, but tap into thatconnection with people who feed
you and let that connectionremind you that you are safe.
(17:20):
And you are fully capable ofhandling your responsibilities.
So I wanna end where I startedand tell you that feeling
overwhelmed does not mean thatyou failed.
It means you're being calledback to your body, to your
values, to your humanity.
You shifted your center ofgravity from yourself and your
(17:40):
strength to do things outside ofyourself.
The to-do list and theresponsibilities, right, became
more important.
But this moment of overwhelm,then that's a moment, an
invitation to realign, to bringyour center back to you.
So take it.
You carry a lot, but you do nothave to carry it all.
(18:04):
If you are ready to move fromsurvival mode to a more soul
aligned way of leading, I wouldlove to walk alongside you maybe
with, that's with one-to-Onecoaching.
So please check out on thewebsite, uh, the coaching
opportunities that areavailable.
And then also my 12 weekprogram, frantic to Flourishing
is designed to help womenreconnect with their values,
(18:25):
their voice, and their vision,so you can lead with confidence
and joy without burning out orbetraying yourself.
And I'm offering that programbecause you deserve to feel good
in the life that you have workedso hard to build.
If that sounds like it could besupportive to you, I'm inviting
you to join the wait list that'sat Women Lead
(18:45):
well.net/flourishing.
So you'll be first in line whendoors open later this summer.
And if this episode spoke toyou, I would love for you to
share it with a friend who'srunning on empty.
We need more women leading fromalignment, not adrenaline.
You can also grab one of ourfree resources like the Mental
(19:05):
Load Reset or the Valuesclarification
exercise@womenleadwell.netlinked in the show notes below.
Remember, joyful, sustainable,and authentic leadership is
possible.
You deserve to enjoy everyminute of it.
Until next time, I'm BeckyHammm.
(19:26):
And this is joyfullyunstoppable.
Okay.
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