Nicole Atkins Opens Up About Life, Art, and Sobriety

Episode Transcript
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Brother Love (00:00):
Telling our stories is the connective tissue of the
collective human experience.
The Just Keep Talking Podcast delvesinto the lives and stories of artists.
What is the impact ofmental health on creativity?
What does it mean to bea creative individual?
Someone who feels deeply, experiencesjoy and pain, intensely and
navigates the challenges of lifeThrough the creative process.

(00:21):
With each story shared, we explore theauthentic experience of our basic need
to Be Seen, to Be Heard, and to Belong.
We are really not so differentfrom one another, nor are we alone.
Together we can Inspire, Encourage, andEnlighten each other to find the true joy
and fulfillment that is within ourselves.
When we Just Keep Talking, we create thespace for gratitude, self-acceptance,

(00:46):
and grace in everyday life.
In a world filled with divisiveness,fostering inclusivity and connection is
a powerful way to make a positive impact.
The Just Keep Talking Podcast with me,Brother Love, because Your Story Matters.
Thank you so much for tuninginto the Just Keep Talking
podcast with me, Brother Love.

(01:06):
You can like and subscribe andshare this show that is now
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You can also support this show byclicking the tip link in the show notes.
This week, my guest is NicoleAtkins, singer, songwriter,
entrepreneur, performer.

Nicole Atkins (02:22):
Thank you guys
an honor.

That's Nicole Atkins singing, Crying.
Roy Orbison.
She was opening up for StevieNicks at a packed arena.
My goodness, what couldbe better than that?
Well, she's on tour right now withChris Isaac making beautiful music.
I've always been in awe of NicoleAtkins, She always grabs my
attention with whatever she's doing,whether it's singing or painting.

(02:52):
She is a true artist and agiving and loving person.
Nicole was gracious enough to have me overfor a conversation that was so endearing,
and so personal, and so mindful.
We talk about our struggles with alcohol.
We talk about art, we talkabout love, we talk about life.
And isn't that just what it's about?
Sharing each other's stories to get toknow each other, to feel connected, and

(03:16):
I do feel connected with Nicole Atkins.
So here's our interviewfrom August of 2023.
It took me a little whileto get the episode out.
But the message is everlasting,and our conversation and
Nicole's story is everlasting.
Please enjoy.
The Just Keep Talking podcastwith me, Brother Love, because
Nicole's Story Matters.

Larry (03:34):
I'm so fortunate to be with Nicole Atkins.
Hello.
Hello neighbor.
You live here in East Nashville, rightaround the corner from where I live.

Yes.
So this is the easiest, commuteto work that you've ever had.
Exactly.

Larry (03:46):
Yeah.
Totally.
I, could have walked here, but in allfairness, I had a little gear on me.

Yeah.

Larry (03:50):
I was already at the gym.
I walked the dog.
I'm like,

eh, I thought I was going to your house.
Yeah.
And then the IRS called, so I was onthe phone with them for quite a bit.

Larry (03:58):
You said the IRS.
We are literally not kidding.
We're having issues.

Taxes are hard when you're a musician.

Larry (04:04):
They really are.

Because you're never home.

Larry (04:05):
Yeah.
It's just so easy to come afteras somebody who's sort of in the
middle of a lot of different things.

I know.

Larry (04:11):
It's not like you have that typical, okay, I worked
this year, I made this much.
At this one job.

This is my salary.
Yeah.

Larry (04:16):
It comes from everywhere.

Yeah.

Larry (04:18):
And it just sucks,

Yeah, it does suck.

Larry (04:20):
And,
it's very painful.

It is.

Larry (04:22):
Well, thank you for being here.
I really, yeah.
Really appreciate it.
I have been a fan ofyours for a long time.

I didn't know that.

Larry (04:29):
And I, of course not.
'cause we didn't know each other.
Yeah.
Like you, to me, you intimidate me.

Really?
Yes.
Good.

Larry (04:35):
You intimidate me because you are what I would call one of the cool kids.

You're right.

Larry (04:40):
You are an indie darling.

Okay.

Larry (04:42):
Does that resonate in any way to you?

Yeah.
I mean, I grew up inthe Indie Scene, right.
In New York.
Yeah.
and it was all like, DIY.
And, I think we were talking about thatbefore you lived on 5th between A and B.

Between 1st and 2nd.

Or 1st and 2nd, I lived on 6th between A and B.

Larry (04:55):
Right.
but you're from Jersey first?

Yeah.
From Asbury Park, right.
Where your wife is from.

Larry (04:59):
Yeah.

Yeah, I moved to New York.
I never thought I'd move to New York.
I wrote my first few songsjust that club owner in Asbury
Park, Scott from The Saint,

Larry (05:08):
The Saint!
I played The Saint you were ateenager when, I played the
Saint for crying out loud.
Yeah.
I mean

I fixed my student ID to say that I was 18 so I
could go to shows, 'cause I wasa year younger than everybody.
But yeah, I, um, wouldjust always go to shows.
And then me and my friend Allisonfrom high school, we used to
do cover songs in harmony.

Larry (05:25):
What high school did you go to?

St.
Rose in Belmar.

Larry (05:26):
St.
Rose in Belmar?

Yeah.

Larry (05:28):
Are you a nice Italian girl,?

I survived or Nice Italian girl.
I'm a friendly Italian person.

Larry (05:32):
Are you Italian?

Yeah.
I'm Sicilian.
good.
Half.

Larry (05:34):
So you're good.
You're half of you is good with a knife?

Yeah, actually.
When I moved to New York,I asked my dad for a can of
mace, he gave me a flip raiser.
And I was like, what?
And he, he was like,anybody messes with you?
And he like, shows me on me.
He's like, you stick 'emin the gut and you rip up.
And I was like, I'm not doing that.

Larry (05:54):
That's amazing.

Thankfully I never had to use it.

Larry (05:56):
That's incredible.

My family's hardcore.
I started playing, At The Saint, youknow, I lied and said I had original
music in 2001 and I wrote 45 minutesworth of music so I could play the gig.
And this guy from Australia waslike, oh, come do the Anti Folk
Hootenany in the East Village with me.
And I just was, I've neverseen anything like it.
I like saw Regina Spector,the Moldy Peaches.

(06:19):
Langhorn Slim, Paleface, Dean and Dean.
Wow.
It was just all these peoplethat were so unique, I was like,
what kind of music is this?
Everybody was like their own kind.

Larry (06:28):
Right.

And you know, bars were open till 4:00 AM It was just like,
this is Mecca.

Larry (06:34):
Yeah.

To me.

Larry (06:35):
Right?
I mean, you hung out at the Sidewalk Cafe.

Yeah.

Larry (06:37):
And there was 7 A was my favorite spot.
Yeah.
Seven

Yeah.
I remember never having enoughmoney for pitchers of beer.
And so when like A & R people startedcoming out, I called all my friends.
I was like, hey, the beer'son them, come meet me.

Larry (06:48):
Yeah, for sure.
and you were playing at Pianos?

Yeah.
We had a residency at Pianos I rememberThe Avett Brothers, I went to college
with them, so they would open, we'dhave a different opener every week, but
we would always give out tangerines.
Right.
So the place smelled amazing.

Larry (07:01):
That's very smart.
Yeah.
That's great.
You should have walked overto CBGBs and threw a few
tangerines in the bathroom over there.

Oh my.
I can still smell the CBGBs bathroom.
Oh yeah.
It's so gross.

Larry (07:10):
A friend of mine, by the way, used to manage 7 A and he
was one of the owners of Pianos.

Oh, wow.

Larry (07:14):
He was a small, he bought in.
We used to be in a band calledD'Tripp, we were like a funk rock band.

Oh, cool.

Larry (07:18):
We were like Sly and the Family Stone.

Nice.

Larry (07:20):
I was the drummer, he was the horn player.
and it was the East Village.
It was the greatest time of,

It was such a good time, and I think about that a lot.
Like I wish I knew that I washaving fun back then because I
was so young and so broke, andlike everything was so dramatic.
Living in a closet, in anybody'scloset that was changed into a bed
and then like going and hangingout at the bar, but having no cash
and putting it on your credit card.
Just being like, fuckit, I'll pay it later.

(07:45):
Just making it work.

Larry (07:47):
Were you afraid?

No.
Anytime I would get afraid,I pushed it outta my mind.

Larry (07:52):
How?

I don't know, it was like a coping mechanism.
I had my own mural business inJersey, so I'd paint murals in
people's houses or restaurants.
Or like houses that wanted tolook like an Italian restaurant,
which I'd be like, whatever,
it's your house.
So I did a weekly gig down in theJersey Shore, like an Irish pub,
and lived half the week in New Yorkwaitressing crap shifts, but always like,

Larry (08:13):
Where were you waitressing?

At Radio Perfecto, And I would put on shows in the back of the,
they never gave me good shifts, you know?
'cause I didn't wanna be a careerwaitress, so I didn't really care.
But they let me put shows onin the back of the restaurant.
And so I had like Regina Specter,she played almost like every week and

Larry (08:29):
That's so cool.

The Avetts and Langhorn, and it was just like one big party.
Mm-hmm.
And that was the thing.
It was like I was having so much fundoing it that I didn't wanna put the
pressure of quote unquote making it
mm-hmm.
I felt like if I did that, it would ruin it.
It would ruin the fun.
So I think that really helped thatmindset of like, you're doing this
to make good work for yourself,

(08:50):
you're doing this to havefun with your friends.
You're making enough money to pay yourbills, that's all you need to focus on.

Larry (08:57):
Wow.
that's very mature of you, especiallyat a young age, because, you know,
we live in a society and a world,or in my own mind every day.
Which is, you know,nothing's enough, you know?

Yeah.
And it's hard to not fallinto that all the time.
Yeah.
You know, like after I did get signedand it was to Columbia, all of a sudden
there was all these feelings introducedof like, you're not doing good enough.
You're not doing good enough.
They're doing better.
They have this, you should have this.

Larry (09:20):
That's before Instagram, by the way.

I know.

Larry (09:22):
You know what you're describing is 30 seconds when people wake up in
the morning before they even yawn.
They have exactly what you justdescribed from just pop, I'm
awake, I open up Instagram,
yeah.
Heart attack.

I know.
And that's it.
It really is.
I feel for, artists just starting out now.
Actually, even when I moved to Nashville,I was like, man, I'm so glad that I
made it when I was in New York becauseit didn't feel, there was no pressure.
It was just, this issomething I love to do.
How do I get better at it?
And I'm still trying to finda job in art using my degree.

Larry (09:57):
Yeah.

Which is impossible.

Larry (09:59):
You have a degree in art?

I had a degree in illustration This was right before graphic
design became like the full-time thing.

Larry (10:05):
Yeah.

And so I, you know, I can hand draw, I can hand paint, but
like how do you find a job in that?

Larry (10:11):
Yeah.

I remember when I went to college too, Friends were like, oh,
you're gonna go to school for music.
And I was like, I'm bad at school.
I don't wanna mess up music with school.
Like music is just the one thing.
I never wanted to taint it.

Larry (10:21):
That's great.
Hear that kids?

I'm pragmatic.
I
didn't want, academics or school orcompetition to ruin my love of music.

Larry (10:28):
Wow.

You know,

Larry (10:29):
Doesn't seem like to me that you suffer from something that I
suffer from, which I guess is, theycall it perfectionism, which is
like, what is everybody gonna think?
Like this show,

yeah.

Larry (10:38):
I've been quote unquote doing the show for five years.
Yeah.
And only now in my, you'relike my third interview.
Fourth interview.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Because it's Not This Enough.
It's Not That, I Don'tHave the Right Gear.

It's Proctastination.

Larry (10:50):
It's procrastination.
It's procrastination, it's fear.
It's not gonna be good enough, whatwill people think if it's not perfect?
Yeah, that's, that's the thing too.

It's, yeah, sometimes you just have to,
just start with a simple action.

Larry (11:00):
A simple...

Like this, I saw you walking your dog and you're
like, hey, you wanna do this?
And then when you put like adeadline or some, the expectations
of somebody else have 'em show up.

Larry (11:09):
Right.

It can be really helpful.
Even
me, like I haven't finished so manysongs yet for my new record and I've
been putting 'em off, putting 'em off.
Oh, I'll be able to work on them once my,little studio in the back is decorated
perfectly and everything is put away.

Larry (11:22):
Right.

And, I'm finally coming around to like, it's never gonna be
perfect in the way that I need it to be.
I just need to start.

Larry (11:29):
You and I are very similar.
I realize, I don't put a lot too muchonto this Uhhuh, but we're both Libras,
we're birthdays are a day apart.
Nice.
I'm September 30th.

Right on.

Larry (11:37):
You're october 1st.
Yeah.
I did a little research.

Yeah.
also, Libras are the best.

Larry (11:40):
We are, aren't we?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I feel like when I talk to youand I see you, there's something
very familiar about you.

I think it's the east coast thing too.

Larry (11:46):
The east coast as well.
The other thing too is thatyou used to drink and party.
Mm-hmm.
And I used to drink and party.

Yeah.

Larry (11:53):
I don't know about you, but I was the best partier, drinker in the world.

Me too!
I was until I wasn't.

Larry (11:58):
Until right.
We talked briefly aboutthis when I first met you.

We were voting.

Larry (12:02):
I'm putting my little crotchety finger.
We were voting!

Yeah.
We were voting.

Larry (12:04):
Go vote!
Make sure.

Yes.

Larry (12:06):
And we discussed very briefly about drinking and alcohol and all that.

I think you had like a year then, right?

Larry (12:12):
It's a year and four months now.

Okay, great.

Larry (12:14):
Something like that.
And what is it for you?

Six years and change.

Larry (12:18):
So you moved to Nashville and you were still drinking?

I, went to rehab in 2015, in April of 2015 and then, moved here in
October and just started relapsing again.
You know how they say don'tmove anywhere for a year.
In AA they say don'tmove anywhere for a year.
Don't make any big life changes.

Larry (12:38):
Right.

It's a good thing to follow.
But sometimes you can't.

Larry (12:41):
Yeah.

You know?
I moved here and when I quit drinking,I went to rehab 'cause I had enough.

Larry (12:46):
Wow.

But I still wanted to drink, and that just like creeped
up, it creeped back really fast.
And it was always like, oh, Icould just have one, you know?
And then two weeks later italways ended up being worse
than I felt the time before.
So it took me a while to get it.
and I didn't get it until, youknow, I'd have like a month and
then I'd have two weeks and thenI'd have two days, you know?

(13:09):
Yeah.
And the counting days thingreally messed with me.
Just 'cause it felt like, okay, I had allthis time, I had six months and now I have
day one and I was just like, God damnit.
You know?

Larry (13:20):
The shame, the shame is

It's, yeah, the shame, I don't know.
I think you just have to get toa point where it's like you're
either gonna die or do this, right?
Because if you're not sure thatyou're an alcoholic, don't go to
AA, because once you do, you'rein, like, even if you're not in
right, like you get it in your mind.
But, I definitely needed to stop becauseI would black out and get anxious and.

(13:43):
Do all these things that were justkind of opposite to what my soul was.
Yeah.
It was like a dual life.
Yeah.
And, um, it didn't feel good.
I moved here and after agig, I fell into a sinkhole.
Like a real one.
So when I called people, like I woke upin the bottom of an eight foot hole, huh.
And it knocked me out and Ihad no idea what happened.

(14:03):
And the guy I was with waslike, can you grab my hand?
I'm like, what are you talking about?
And he was like, youfell, you're bleeding.
And I'm like, what?
And then I see all theserocks and I'm like, what the.
I didn't even know what a sinkhole was.

Larry (14:15):
Wow.

Until I moved here, or actually until I
woke up in the bottom of one!

Larry (14:18):
Right.

And then I just saw that movie, the Descent at the time,
and I was like, oh my God Trolls!
Get me outta here!
It just was such a crazy wake upcall I hit two centimeters from
my spine or from my, tailbone.

Larry (14:29):
Yeah.

Thank God I had a big butt, because I would've broken my back.

Larry (14:32):
Wow.

The fact that I didn't break my back, you know, I had a
really horrible injury for a long time.
I had all this, fluid and, now I havescar tissue, but it could have been
so much worse, or I could have died.
I don't visit this thought often,but it made me realize if something
happens to you and somethingcan happen to you at any time.
And I would have a lot of anxiety aboutdying or about other people dying.

(14:56):
But when I was like that close tomaybe it happening, it was just like,
oh wait, what's there to be afraid of?
I just operated my life in alot of fear and anxiety about
what other people thought of me.
Mm-hmm.
Or like, you know, not being goodenough or not being like nice
enough, like all of these things.
And I think that has to do a lot with,you know, Catholic, Italian upbringing.

Larry (15:18):
Right.

For sure.
Because there's a lot of fear.
If it's not good, if it'snot nice, you better fix it.

Larry (15:24):
Right.

You know, like, Oh, You're Depressed?
Well, You Better Fix It.

Larry (15:27):
Hmm.

And it's a generational thing too, I think.

Larry (15:29):
For sure.

I think.
And, when that happened, I was just like,why are you afraid to talk to people?
Why do you think you'reafraid to go on stage?
You could die in a holein a Baymont Inn & Suites.
Fuck it.
It was the best, worstthing that happened to me.
It changed my life.
I was ready to finally quit thebooze and just talk to people.
They can, you know, ask for help.

Larry (15:49):
Connection.

Connection and presence, and not feeling like I had
to cover myself up with, you know, andthat's what drinking was ultimately.
They say it's a social lubricant,but man, if the conversation's good
or if the person has good chat,I could talk to them all night.

Larry (16:04):
Was it fearful?
Were you nervous?
I was scared outta my mindwhen I stopped drinking.
Could I be funny?

Mm.

Larry (16:09):
Because I'm very much the life of the party.

Yeah.

Larry (16:11):
I have, an ebullient personality, you know, and

I'm gonna be boring now.

Larry (16:15):
I'm a performer and I can talk to anybody.
I'm very charming.
I'm a front man in my band.
I built a relationship withmy wife, based on partying.

Me too.

Larry (16:24):
That's like, we met, we partied,

We were savages, we were Yeah.

Larry (16:28):
You know, you know, and, and could this be done?

Yeah.

Larry (16:30):
And thank goodness, yeah.
The answer is

I think
that's the lie that the disease tells you.
Because like, I have so manyfriends too that, you know, I just
feel like I'm gonna be boring.
But my biggest thing that I noticedwas I got back into a lot of the
things that I loved when I was a kid.
Like I started making artagain, not to be perfect.
But just because I enjoyed it.
And then I started doing it every dayand I said to a friend who always asked

(16:54):
me like, I think I would, you know,be really boring if I quit drinking.
I was like, were you a boring kid?
And he's like, no.
And I'm like, and then you won't be.

Larry (17:02):
The other thing too, I was just thinking about this was being a woman.
Were you, like a Party Girl, you know?

Yeah.
My thing was like, I like tobe the girl that could drink
with the guys and play poker.

Larry (17:13):
Right.

And I still like playing poker I'm going
to my drummer's bachelor party.

Larry (17:17):
Yeah.

And also being in a van with guys for your whole life.
Yeah.
Being in a band with guys, like, youdon't really think about gender that much.
I don't.
Other people do.
Right.
But I don't.
that was a a cliche thingthat we're taught in movies.
I'm gonna teach myself to drinkscotch with the gentleman.

Larry (17:32):
Right.

But what you don't realize is like all of those things
that were the cool parts of what youthought that drinking enabled you to do,

Larry (17:40):
Mm-hmm.

You could do them so much better when you don't have that.

Larry (17:44):
Yeah, totally.

You just become way sharper and like better at
shows, better at pulling pranks.
I still keep all those things, I'm justnot getting people mad at me or waking up
and not being able to get outta my bed.

Larry (17:57):
If you were to fall off...

Mm.

Larry (17:58):
When you fell off.
It's the shame thing, the guilt thing.

I fell off I tried to get sober for four years before it stuck.

Larry (18:04):
Really?

Yeah.
It was terrible.
Like my friend, Jay from, uh.
New York, he was one of my best friends.
And I remember I always thoughthis band was so cool and he
was playing the Mercury Lounge.
He'd always give me his drink tickets.
He's like, I can't put you on the guestlist, but you can have my drink tickets.
And I was like, how come youalways gimme your drink tickets?
'Cause they don't give you that many.

Larry (18:22):
Yeah.

And he's like, I'm an AA.
And I was like, what?
And he's like, yeah,I've got like four years.
And I was like, yeah, see you there in 10.
And when I was trying to getsober, like we would go to,
you know, meetings together and
I'd be like, how do you do this?
How are you able to hang out atlike after hours and stuff with us?
And he's like, well, I don't drink or dodrugs anymore, but you guys are my people.

Larry (18:42):
Right.

You know, like the Psych Scene People are My People.

Larry (18:45):
Yeah.

And I'm like, that's cool.
And I think if it wasn't for him,I would've always thought okay,
now I have to change who I am.
Like I've been a rock androller since I was a kid.

Larry (18:56):
Yeah.

Know, like wrestling and MTV were my things.

Larry (18:58):
Who was your wrestler?

Ultimate Warrior had the same haircut since 1991,
you know, but he was just so cool.

Larry (19:05):
Yeah.

And he still did the things that we love to do, but just
without the things that were hurting him.

Larry (19:10):
Yeah.

If somebody got really, fucked up and was just
repeating themselves in his face,he would just gracefully move away.

Larry (19:17):
Yeah.
You know, that's, see, there it is.
The gracefully move away part.
Cause people will come to me as if it'sa comparison or that I'm judging them.
"I only had three."

It's them.

Larry (19:25):
I said, I don't care.

Yeah.
You can have as many drinks as you want.

Larry (19:27):
I say, "Would you like me to buy you a drink?"
Yeah.
I'll buy you a drink right now.

Yeah.

Larry (19:30):
I'll sip.
I just wanna see what it tastes like.
Uhhuh, I'm done.
I mean, I'm done.

See,
I don't even wanna sip.
Booze doesn't taste good.
I mean, when I was like 11 and 12,we used to like, you know, steal,
like steal from our parents' barand hold our noses, and chug it.
Yeah.
Because it tasted like shit.
Yeah.

Larry (19:44):
I taste and I say, oh, that's a red wine.
And I'll say, wow, that's kind of good.
And in my mind I'm like, you know, ifwe ever retired to Spain, maybe I'll
give my permission to drink red wine.
maybe.
Yeah.

See, I know that I would.
I would just become a fucking mess.

Larry (19:57):
Yeah.
So I taste everything.
And I go, eh, whatever.
Doesn't matter.
But tequila, my sweet love,my darling love tequila.

Keep away
from me.

Larry (20:05):
I tasted it.
And it, my body seized up.
I'm not kidding.
Yeah.
It seized up and I, it was poison it felt,my whole body said, Nope, this is poison.

Doing a gig on my 18 month.
I had 18 months that day.
Mm-hmm.
And we were opening for the Avett Brothers, and I had a
glass of water on like my makeup stand.
You know, I was getting ready and mythroat was kind of hurting and I put
some oil of oregano in the water.

Larry (20:32):
Oh.

One of my ex band mates got sloppy with the tequila and was just
like leaving it around on my dresser.

Larry (20:38):
Mm-hmm.

It has oil of oregano in it.
And I shoot it because I alwaystake my oil of oregano like shots.
And I tasted the tequila andI was like, what the fuck?
And he's like, oh no!
I immediately ran into the bathroom.
'Cause I was just so worried at 18months, and it took me so long to get
that much time that what if it hit.
You know how it hits your chestand gives you that warm feeling.

(21:00):
What if that kicks in?
And then my mind goes back to,oh, well you get a freebie.
You know?
And I made myself throw up.

Larry (21:07):
Wow.

And then I ran up on stage and sang with the band
we were opening for in front of10,000 people, and I was fuming.
Wow.
I was so fucking mad.
You know?
Because at that time,

Larry (21:17):
Were you mad at yourself or were you mad at him?
You were just like, how could you?

I did the right thing.
I was pissed at him because Iwas like, this is still, even at
18 months, it was still fragilebecause I relapsed so many times.

Larry (21:29):
Yeah.
I gave myself permission.
That was my deal.

Yeah.

Larry (21:32):
I said, you know what?
I'm an adult.
If you, Larry, if you wannahave a beer, have a beer.

Yeah.

Larry (21:37):
And then I said, all right.
I was so depressed.
And I was not workingbecause it was off the road.

Yeah.
What are
you gonna do now?

Larry (21:44):
And depression really runs deeply in my family.

Yeah.
I struggle with it every day

Larry (21:48):
And my blood pressure was still high.

Uhhuh.

Larry (21:50):
I was at the gym all the time, eating better.
My doctor's like, you know,it's a little high still.
I'm on the meds.
And I said, I have no shot.
I have no chance in a million years or inhell to heal myself or to at least try.

Yeah.

Larry (22:02):
If I'm drinking.

Yeah.

Larry (22:03):
So I said, I'm done.
And then I said, I'm a big boy.
If I want to have one, I'll have one.
A week later we had a,show Musician's Corner.
Wow.
What a cool show.
Yeah, right.?
I said, I'll probablyhave a beer after that.

Yeah.

Larry (22:14):
And then I went up and said, I'll have a club soda, please.
I said, no, I'm good.

Yeah.
Good for you.

Larry (22:19):
Thank you.
And then it started becoming,
Cause

It's hard.

Larry (22:21):
Vanity.

Yeah.

Larry (22:22):
Right.
So I'm like, wow.
All of a sudden I'm losing weight.

Yeah.

Larry (22:26):
I'm like, this is great.

Yeah.
I always thought that I had mydad's side of the family jeans.

Larry (22:30):
Yeah.

And my mom and my sister are super skinny.

Larry (22:33):
Right.

I started drinking so young and I was like, wait,
I'm on their side!
And people were like, girl,are you eating enough?
And I'm like, dude, I'm not consuming2000 calories of booze at night
and crushing a Dominoes at 4:00 AM.

Larry (22:45):
It's insane.
But I love dessert.
Sweets now are my thing.
I'm a maniac.

I have dessert
every night.

Larry (22:49):
I'll have dessert six times a day if I want.
I'm like, I give myself that.

Yeah.

Larry (22:52):
So I'll drink the non-alcoholic beer because I like a cold, like.
Bud?
Zero.

You like
Bud Zero?

Larry (22:57):
Well,
I like Miller Light and a shotof tequila is what I like.

Yeah.

Larry (23:00):
I don't like the fancy and, I'm not gonna sit and drink non-alcoholic things.
I'm like, why get fat?
Like,

Exactly.

Larry (23:05):
Why get fat and not enjoy myself?

You know what's weird to notice too, is like, I could never
understand people that would like order adrink and like leave it, leave half of it.
And I'm like, what the hell?

Larry (23:14):
What are you nuts?

Yeah,
there's good booze in there.
But with a non-alcoholic beer,like sometimes I can't even finish
'em 'cause they're so heavy.

Larry (23:20):
They're so heavy.
So I get the, crappiest lightand I have like half a one or
I'll have one and I'm done.
And I'm like, that's cool.

Yeah.

Larry (23:25):
And I'm very fortunate for that and I feel lucky because then I
start to think, well, if I fall off,
the shame that's gonna come.
Because it's, really nearimpossible the distinction, the
difference between I'm a fuck up.
The shame.
And
just guilt, like, guilt.
Hey, you know what?
I fucked up.

And it's a different kind that you feel
like with doing any other kinds.
I always think about my friendsthat drink, they'll wake up
and be like, oh, I'm hungover.
I'm gonna go get a, you know,ham, egg and cheese sandwich.

Larry (23:51):
Yeah.

And they go about their day.
But like for me, it was like devastating.
Like it was like, oh, I'm hungover.
This is the apocalypse.
And I think that's the distinctionbetween alcoholics and non alcoholics.

Larry (24:03):
Yeah.

People that can drink and people that can't.
Yeah.
They don't feel the apocalypsehappen while they're laying in bed.

Larry (24:08):
Just another day.

Yeah.

Larry (24:09):
Does your, husband drink?

Yeah, he drinks
beer and he's fine.

Larry (24:12):
Yeah.
My wife drinks and
Yeah.
I just try to give the space of like, you

You Do You.

Larry (24:17):
Yeah.
I'm not judging each,

I don't have a problem with you.

Larry (24:20):
Just, do you, you know?

Yeah.

Larry (24:21):
And that's what I try.
I'm like, look, you're onyour journey with this.
Yeah.
And I'm here to support you.
And it's just important causeI'm a judgmental person.

Yeah.

Larry (24:28):
I'm doing my best to not be in all forms of my life.
I'm now recalling people whowill just automatically put this
whole like, you are sick, youare messed up if you're drinking.
Really shame the hell outta somebody.

Yeah.
I can't do that just because that was done
to me a lot.

Larry (24:43):
Yeah.

And it never worked.
It was like, you know, I wouldhave friends or date people
where, I, I would black out.
So I would say, you know, fuckedup shit that when I heard
about it, I was like, oh my God.
It just like, that's not me.
I
didn't mean that.
Why would I say that?
I can't imagine saying that.
And it would just hurt so much.
And I would just cry and cry and cry.

(25:05):
But, my husband, when we met, and wepartied together, he would never make
me feel worse than I already felt.
I'm like, oh, what happened last night?
And he's like, you know, I'm noteven going to get into it because I
know you feel, he had this empathy.

Larry (25:20):
Yeah.
That's amazing.

That made
me wanna quit for him and then for myself.
so

Larry (25:26):
That's a superpower.
Empathy is really a superpower.

It is a superpower.

Larry (25:29):
It's probably, the most underrated superpower ever.

Yeah.

Larry (25:32):
You want to bend steel, no empathy.

Yeah.
and it's tough though too, like I'm anempath and like sometimes it gets tough
when you like soak up everybody's moods.
But that's something I work on now andit's something I have the space to work on
because I'm not dealing with the hangover.

Larry (25:46):
What, do you, and you don't have to answer this, but as far
as, God, Religion, Spirituality?

Yeah.
I've
always felt a connection tosomething bigger than myself.
I just like the idea ofthe ship having a captain.
That's not me.

Larry (25:59):
Right.

But when I was first getting sober, I was like, oh my
God, am I gonna have to start goingto church and ice cream socials?
This is horrible.
But when they say like, takewhat you want and leave the rest.
They mean it, you know?
And for me it was Let Go and Let God.
I was like, what the fuck does that mean?
Does that mean just do nothing?
But I remember being in the oceanand it was August on the Jersey

(26:21):
Shore, which is like jellyfish time,
and going in the ocean, wantingto have a swim, and just being
so paranoid that I was gonna get
bit by a jellyfish.

Larry (26:28):
Right?

That, or stung by a jellyfish.
And that thought, Let Go, Let Godcame into my head and it was like,
Do you wanna have fun in the ocean?
And maybe you won't, or maybe youwill, but it's outta your control.
And I was like, that's what that means!
So I just had fun in the ocean.
I didn't get stung.

Larry (26:46):
Look at you.

So there's just certain points that just happen
that you don't expect them.
You don't know when they're gonna come.
You know, when people are like,Don't Give Up because one day
you won't want it anymore.
And that's a great feeling and Ijust couldn't imagine that happening.

Larry (26:59):
Yeah.

You know?
'Cause I always wanted it andI always was like, oh, why?
Then like six months after, I rememberdoing Bonnaroo and it, I was doing the
super jam, like singing at the 1:00 AMset and thinking, how the hell am I gonna
survive a whole day at Bonnaroo and awhole night at Bonnaroo with an open bar?
Yeah.
And seeing a bunch of my old friendsand you know, not having a drink
and like, I brought a couple friendswith me that were, non-drinkers and

(27:22):
super fun and they had a lot of time.
And it wasn't until I got home at like4:30 in the morning and had a cigarette
on my porch that I then realized.
I didn't think aboutthe bar the whole day.

Larry (27:33):
Wow.

Then I was like, It Happened!
And it was just such a good feeling,and it didn't stick all the time,
but, it gave me a reference point.
Yeah.
And then after a while it just went away.

Larry (27:43):
Wow.
That's amazing.
You've done some really cool things.
You played Letterman?

Yeah.

Larry (27:47):
Right?
Were you drinking whenyou played Letterman?

Not when I played Letterman, but after.

You
were a drinker.

Yeah.
Different.
But I was younger
then too.
Right.
You know, like,

Larry (27:54):
And I'm
not to say that you shouldn't havea drink, you know what I mean?

I'm gonna
have one Jamison before we get on stage.
Okay.
You know?
But then

Larry (28:00):
One turns to

I was younger.
And one just sometimes would stay at one.
Right.
But also on my first tour, I would lose myvoice all the time, 'cause I had polyps.
On my vocal cords.

Larry (28:09):
Geez.

And so there were tours where like I had to be on prednisone and I
couldn't drink at all, and I couldn'thave wheat or sugar or anything.

Larry (28:18):
Yeah.

You know, and I couldn't talk if I wanted to play the show.
So it was a painful regimen thatI would have to do in order for my
polyps not to interfere, with the gig.

Larry (28:30):
Right.

But then when I quit drinking, like.
Six months later, I went and got scopedat my doctors and he's like, They're Gone.

Larry (28:37):
Isn't that I'm something?

I'm like, what?

Larry (28:38):
My blood pressure, by the way, went down immediately.

Yeah.

Larry (28:42):
I went to the eye doctor.
He's like, when I saw you last,which was when I was drinking.
He's like, were you in a verystressful situation back then?
I was like, every day'sa freaking stressfull....

Were your eyes worse?

Larry (28:50):
My eyes had gotten better.

Wow.

Larry (28:53):
My eyes improved.

I need your eye doctor's number.

Larry (28:56):
No, He's Mr.
Magoo.
This guy is Mr.
McGoo.

I need Mr.
Magoo.

Larry (28:58):
was

Because I now need glasses, for my glasses, for my glasses.

Larry (29:01):
I have the same, these are I, everything's prescription.
I'm blind is a bat.
This guy, Mr.
Magoo, he said, "Lastyear you had a stigmatism.
No, you don't."
I was like, how does one not have that?

It's wild.
I would get pain in the insideof both knees all the time and
I could never figure out whyand that just went away too.

Larry (29:16):
Amazing.
Right?

Yeah.

Larry (29:17):
It's incredible.

Inflammation.
Inflammation is a motherfucker.

Larry (29:21):
You're working on some new music.

Yeah.

Larry (29:23):
You've been doing this thing now for a long time.

Yeah.

Larry (29:25):
And I would like to say that you're seem like somebody
that doesn't necessarily do the,the tap dance for everybody.

No, and I mean, it's probably why I don't own this house, but,

Larry (29:36):
Okay well, you're bad at real estate

With music I just really am interested in the art of
it and the, the showmanship of itand not really interested in trends.
I never have been.
I like the sound of old music.
I like the sound of Classic Rockin 1940s and fifties ballads.
That's what I've alwaysbeen interested in.
Like, you know, findingnew ways to do that sound.

Larry (29:58):
Yeah.
Moving to Nashville.

Mm-hmm.

Larry (30:00):
That's a very different world.

Oh, it's totally different.
I mean it's, it's, it'snot my scene really, but

Larry (30:04):
It's not at all.
When I first came to Nashville,I was in a country rock band.

Yeah.

Larry (30:08):
Nobody would come and visit me from New York.
'cause they thoughtit's all Country Music.

That's what I thought

Larry (30:12):
After this Country Rock band.
I was in a Rock and Roll band.

Mm-hmm.

Larry (30:15):
In a scene where there is all types of music and nobody believed me.

There's so many different types of music here.
And also too, like, it's nice to justfeel like a worker amongst workers.
Like, yeah.
Everybody's in a working band.
Yeah.
Or working on music

Larry (30:29):
It's amazing.

You know, back in Jersey I always felt like the people
were more interested in the characterof me rather than like the real me.
Where it's like, you know, I'm a.
person with friends and a partner anda family and normal things, and they're
just like, "Ah, you're doing great hun."
You doing great?
And it's just like.
Never.
Like, how are you doing?

Larry (30:49):
Yeah.

But like here, it's nice to have a lot of different
people to talk to that we can, youknow, talk about like business things
It didn't feel so isolatingwhen I moved here.
We moved here too, 'cause myhusband's from Scotland and he's like,
Jersey people are really intense.
I'm like, yeah, if youdidn't, grow up with them.

Larry (31:05):
Yeah.

You know, We bust each other's balls into oblivion.
Until there's
no more balls left.

Larry (31:09):
You hear that ladies and gentlemen.
So for those of you whoget a little mad at me,

Oh God.

Larry (31:12):
for being, a little abrupt.

I had to learn quick.
You know,

Larry (31:15):
We bust each
other's balls.
Now I'm getting to the pointwhere, when Sarah, who's from your
hometown, I call her Mean Mrs.
Mommy.
"Mean Mrs.
Mommy is the meanestmommy ever in the land."

That's so funny.

Larry (31:26):
And she's like, what do you mean?
You're from where I'm from!
And I'm like, maybe I'mgetting soft, in my older age.
Two minutes later, by the way, I'mthe biggest asshole in the world.

But the thing is, if I didn't like you, I
wouldn't be busting your balls.
But I was also like too sensitivefor the ball busting Right.
In my hometown,
because it's relentless.

Larry (31:42):
Yeah.
And
also, people stay in their hometownand no matter what hometown you're from
in America, the fact that you up andleft, there's a big deal with that.
You know?

Yeah.

Larry (31:51):
A) "Who do you think you are?"
B) Oh, I love this one,"I'm so proud of you."

Yeah.
I'm so proud that you're still doing it.

Larry (31:57):
So you left New Jersey mm-hmm.
And you came to a place where youfelt like you were really a part of
something that's bigger than you,
and that you belong.

And I don't know if I love living in Nashville.
But I mean, I love having this porch.

Larry (32:08):
This is a great porch.
Your porch is spectacular.

It's affordable for now.

Larry (32:13):
Where would you see yourself living?
Or could you?

That's the thing I've never seen anywhere as home.
I've always seen everywhere as home.
I love being on the road.
And I love, having friends in Sweden,friends in England, and friends in LA.
Friends in Mexico that I getto go and visit and feel like
I'm part of many families.

Larry (32:32):
That's great.
That's beautiful.

The good thing about Nashville is like we
have a very easy airport.
And when I was living in New York, myexpenses and overhead was just so high.

Larry (32:41):
It, yeah.
It's crazy.

It's the best city ever to live in, but it's a hard
city when you're not just killing it.

Larry (32:47):
People say, would you ever go back?
I'm like, look, I'm born and raised there.

If I was rich, I would have a place there.
Totally.
But being here gives me afinancial ease that like, when
somebody's like, Hey, we're goingto do this in, you know, Denver.
I'm like, I'll see you there.

Larry (33:00):
Yeah.

Before I moved here, I was actually telling not
to name drop, but, Chris Isaac.
He took me on my first toursand we're good friends.
And when I first moved here, Iwas working for Sirius Radio.
And I interviewed him and I hadn't seenhim in seven years, and he was like,
you should come out to San Franciscoand we should write a song together.
And I'm like.
Yes!

Larry (33:18):
Mm.

And so I didn't have the money to go there.
So I remember like just stressingout so hardcore and applying for
a credit card just so I couldput the plane ticket on it.

Larry (33:27):
Did you have a little piece of tape?
Chris Isaac credit card.

No, but the thing is, and I think, you know, to people
listening at home that they don'trealize that, a lot of musicians
are starting to get more comfortabletalking about is like; yeah, you could
be on Tv, you could win a Grammy.
But finances are so upand down and up and down.
So at the time, I couldn't afforda plane ticket to San Francisco,
but I got the plane ticket.
We wrote "A Little Crazy" together andwe wrote "Goodnight Ronda Lee" together.

(33:52):
It was totally worth it.
But I said to him now, 'cause he's like,man, I really, hope you stay doing this
because it's gonna work at some point.
I'm like, it's working now.
Yeah.
And I'm like, I know I don'tlive in this neighborhood.
Hmm.
But the fact that I can go buya plane ticket whenever I want.
Yeah.
That's success to me.
That's
all I need.
You strive for thatand then you get there,
and that becomes the baseline.

Larry (34:14):
Yeah.
We are in an amazing situation thatwe can jump and get on the road.
Yeah.
And go tour, come back.
We have a home.

It's very communi like communal out here.
You know?
Like people go on the road andyou have friends that aren't on
the road that can water your pets.
Yeah.
They forget about the ferns, but

Larry (34:29):
They water your pets instead.

They water your pets.
And when I quit drinking andstarted drawing again and painting
again, that became another thingwhere it's like, okay, crap.
I can't afford plane tickets to, youknow, this tour in the UK 'cause plane
tickets are outrageous right now.
And, hotels are outrageous right now.
Yeah.
But I can, okay, what do I need to do?
I need to make this amount of money.

Larry (34:50):
Mm-hmm.

I don't wanna put the stress on the music, so I'm gonna make a
painting and I'm gonna put it up for sale.

Larry (34:55):
That's great.

So the music, having a fan base small but mighty, has also
given me an outlet to sell my artwork.

Larry (35:02):
Yeah.
I remember during Covid just seeing yourposts and you were very, gracious and
loving towards your fans 'cause theywere gracious and loving towards you.

Yeah.
We
made a TV show together.
Yeah.
That TV show really happened becauseI was worried about my side guys.
You know?
'Cause I could go online and maketips, but they don't write songs.
So it's like, crap.
They had a whole year planned out too.
What are we gonna do?

Larry (35:22):
Yeah.

And it was
so fun.

Larry (35:24):
So you're working on a new record?

Working on a new record and, I'm working
on a super secret project.
That is not music.
I'm writing something.
That, uh, is something I've neverdone before, but I'm writing
something based on my dad.

Larry (35:36):
He's Italian?
Sicilian?

He is not, but he looks it.

Larry (35:39):
No.
What is he?

I don't know.

Larry (35:40):
Your dad.

He's like, I don't know.
I'm white trash.
That's what he says.

Larry (35:43):
That's fantastic.
So the songs and the new project.

Yeah.
And I've been producing somepeople's music and yeah.
Helping.
I like helping people.
I like helping otherartists that are stuck,
figure out how to get unstuck.

Larry (35:55):
That's what you're doing right now, by the way.
That's what this is all about,

My mom's like, you've been doing the same stuff
since you were six years old.
I'm like, That's Good.

Larry (36:03):
I thought of you.
I've been reading, so BrenéBrown has been like my savior.

Okay.
Everybody keeps tellingme I need to read her.

Larry (36:08):
And she had a TED Talk.
It was something that Icouldn't wait to watch.
And within 10 minutes I had a meltdownbecause she just hit like every button.

She hit it.

Larry (36:17):
She hit everyone.
Like she was like.
BOOM!
And I was like, That's it.
I can't take anymore!.
I just fucked it up like completely.
All this work I've been doing,I quit drinking for what?
Who cares?
I'm a piece of shit.
Everything's done.

Oh no.

Larry (36:26):
Oh, oh.
Yeah.
I mean, I, composed myself.
Yeah.
I got myself together.
But anyway, this is from, The Giftsof Imperfection, page 21, Brené Brown.

Okay.

Larry (36:33):
And I thought of you.

Oh, cool.

" Larry (36:35):
The willingness to tell our stories, feel the pain of others,
and stay genuinely connected inthis disconnected world is not
something we can do Halfheartedly.
To practice Courage, Compassion, andConnection is to look at life and the
people around us and say, I'm All In."

Yeah.

Larry (36:54):
I've never had a conversation with you other than Hi.
I read this and I don't know what it is.
It's something about you, beinga fan of yours, but also just
wanting to be your friend.
You're very open book andI really appreciate that.

Thanks.

Larry (37:07):
You seem like you have your own life

Or unfiltered.

Larry (37:10):
Well, you're unfiltered.
You have a private life.
Like you have your thing.

Yeah.

Larry (37:13):
You're not pleasing and proving, you're not tap dancing to the world.
I watched you for 10 minutes.
Put a post together.

Yeah.

Larry (37:20):
Right?
And you did it because you haveto freaking do it, but you weren't
like, it wasn't so precious.

Somebody was saying that before I went on stage in
Brooklyn a couple weeks ago.
They were like, you just seemlike you walk in off the street,
you know, I was dressed up.
And you're just like, Hey, how you doing?
Then you take the micand you're like, rah!!!
And I probably should warm up fora show, but I feel like if I do, it
takes me out of my day to day of,
this is just what I do.

Larry (37:42):
That's very important.
I'll tell you what, I don'tdo, Change Up What I Do.

Yeah.

Larry (37:46):
Routine for some of us is...

I eat a little cheese toasty and have a cigarette and a
Yerba Mate, and then just go do it.

Larry (37:53):
Yeah.
I watched you sing the other nightat the Grateful Dead Tribute.

That was fun.

Larry (37:57):
And you reminded me, I said to myself, I said to not myself.
I said to the person standing next to me,I said, she's kind of like, Robert Plant.

Oh, thank you.,

Larry (38:05):
You reminded me of Robert Plant.

I love him.

Larry (38:06):
Because like you were very, tender, and then you ripped our heads off within
the span of, I dunno, four seconds.

Thank you.

Larry (38:13):
And thank you.

I mean, that's, that's the best.

Larry (38:15):
That was really cool.

That's my wrestling power move.
Yeah.

Larry (38:18):
I appreciate it, ' cause I'm very much like you.
I love old music, I feel like,wow, it would've been so cool.
Like just the days of

Yeah.
Imagine
if we were alive back then?
They didn't know how good they had it.

Larry (38:26):
Yeah.
I was a singing waiter in aJewish steakhouse in New York.
Yes.
I worked at Sammy's Roumanian Steakhouse.

Did you really?

Larry (38:30):
And so Sinatra,

I always wanted to go there.

Larry (38:32):
We had a blast.
Talk about drinking.
I mean, we served vodka.
I got, so

That was my favorite bar was the Italian restaurants.

Larry (38:38):
Oh yeah.
Oh yeah.
I'd go to Italian restaurant Bamonte's.

I lived around the corner from it.
on Union?

Larry (38:44):
It was on Union underneath pretty much the Williamsburg Bridge, right?

Yea Williamsburg Bridge.

Larry (38:47):
So this was a restaurant where the
waiters were 130 years old.

Yes.
They were like, actually thewaiters were not even alive.
They were ghosts.

Larry (38:55):
They were ghosts.
The tables were all just the redand white checkered old school time
that you would see in a cartoon.

Yeah.
It's mafia people in there and the food is
perfect.

Larry (39:02):
It was mafia people sitting next to police people.

Yeah.

Larry (39:05):
Each table had, I'm gonna say input, had a thing for a telephone jack.
Yeah, because a phone wouldring and they would bring the
phone over from back in the day,

Uhhuh

Larry (39:14):
And plug the phone in.

So crazy.

Larry (39:16):
You know, Ms.
Atkins,

It's still there.

Larry (39:17):
It's still there.
And I remember
Uncle Dickie,
I think it was Uncle.

I see his face in my

Larry (39:21):
He was the bartender.

Yeah, the bartender.

Larry (39:23):
And I worked with his nephew, at Sammy's.

Okay.

Larry (39:26):
Hey, Uncle Dickie!
Hello, Larry.
How you doing Larry?
Yeah.
How you doing?
How many you got tonight?
Four of Yous?
All right.
Just sit down.
What are Yous drinking?
And it didn't matter what I said, right?
I said, how about some wine?
I got some wine for you.
And someone I'd be with wouldbe like, I'd like a cabernet.
I'm like, we're just getting wine.

Yeah.

Larry (39:40):
And you know that it was wine that was poured twice from
something to something else into this.

Yeah.
It's wet ain't it?
Drink it.

Larry (39:45):
You know?
And it was just the best experience ever.
It was fantastic.
So I was a singing waiter andI was singing Sinatra songs.
Something from another era.

Yeah.

Larry (39:53):
And I just adore.

That's my happy place.

Larry (39:55):
It really is.
I was doing a little radioshow called, Sinatra Sundays.
And I think I'd like to do it.

Oh, you should do
it again.
Do it at the radio station here.

Larry (40:01):
That's what I would love to do a Sinatra Sundays and just do it.

You should do that.
I would love that.

Larry (40:05):
I just love it.

Clean my house and put it on.

Larry (40:06):
I love radio.

Me too.

Larry (40:07):
I love it so much.
Yeah.
It's such a beautiful form.

Radio is a constant companion.

Larry (40:11):
The reason why, of course I know you, is that I heard you're
on the radio here in Nashville.

Really?

Larry (40:14):
Goodnight Ronda Lee.
What a record.

Thanks.

Larry (40:16):
What a record.
And then you went to Muscle Shoals.

Yeah.
And then the pandemic happened.

Larry (40:20):
And then the pandemic but you made a record.

Yeah, we made Italian Ice.
That was one the bestexperiences I've ever had.

Larry (40:26):
Is there something as far as new music?
Sooner than later?
I mean, it's no pressure.
We're living off what yougot and it's really great.
Great.

What I got is, we're opening for Stevie Nicks October 28th.

Larry (40:34):
There you go.

The rest, you'll just have to stay tuned on the, Instagrams.

Larry (40:39):
That's great.
so you've opened up forStevie Nicks before?

Yeah, we did it twice.
Yeah, and it was just, I've neverplayed an arena before and we got
everybody to stand up and slow danceand to sing Roy Orbison with me.
It felt easy.
It just felt like all of these people,if I could get them to just, do
things with us like dance and sing.
It was such a good feeling.
Yeah, it didn't feel disconnected.
It just felt like I got to partywith 20,000 people for 30 minutes.

Larry (41:04):
How cool is that?

It's cool.

Larry (41:05):
This is my questions portion.

Okay.

Larry (41:07):
What fascinates you?
Easy,
question.

Math.

Larry (41:11):
Really?

Yes.

Larry (41:12):
Why?

Because I can't do it at all.

Larry (41:14):
So it fascinates you?

Like people that are good at it, people that are good at math.

Larry (41:18):
Right.

People that, are really regimented and organized, fascinate me.

Larry (41:22):
That's amazing.

But yeah, things I guess that people would
consider mundane, fascinate me.

Larry (41:27):
That's cool.
What angers you?

Intolerance.
Racism, Ego.

Larry (41:32):
Yeah.

Like when people can't see that they're part
of a team really angers me.

Larry (41:37):
That's an artist, ladies and gentlemen saying that.
Yeah.

When, meanness, like when you see somebody just
being mean to somebody for noreason, like I wanna fight them.

Larry (41:45):
I was bullied as a kid.

I was bullied too.

Larry (41:46):
So when I see somebody being like, I remember when I was a little bit
older, this kid came up to me and said,what does it mean to be a Mongolian?

Huh?

Larry (41:55):
And I said, what do you mean?
Like, that's actually a placeand there are people from there.
I remember being a kid,What are you, retarded?
You're a mongoloid.

Yeah, Kids are horribly cruel.

Larry (42:04):
And I remember that the kid asked me and I, my heart just
shattered into a billion pieces.
'Cause I was like, right now, thisis everything that's in your world
and it's gonna get way better.
You're gonna be just fine,

I wish I knew that back then.
But at the time, like when people,you know, would say horrible things to
me, like I remember, you know, we'rean Italian family from Neptune City.
But like my dad got a raise in hisjob and, we moved to Shark River and
then I went to Catholic School inSpring Lake, which is a very like, old
money, wealthy Irish Catholic place.

(42:35):
And we would get made fun of forbeing Italian or from Neptune,

Larry (42:38):
Right.

And it's like, that's so dumb.
But also it made me just wanna like,okay, I'm gonna fuck with your car
when you get a fucking license.

Larry (42:47):
You handle it way better than I.
Oh my God.
So, What Brings You Joy?

Being around my friends that I love, good
conversations, making music.

Larry (42:56):
Hmm.

Painting things, having rainy days like this is great to just feel
okay sitting home and painting things.

Larry (43:02):
Isn't that great?

Yeah.

Larry (43:04):
I love it.
So somebody said to me the other day, Doyou ever just like wanna just fuck off?
I said, just gimme the chance!

Yeah.

Larry (43:09):
Gimme the sign!.
Yeah.
Hey, do you wanna just hangout and just lay on the couch?
I'm already here.

Yeah,

Larry (43:14):
No problem.
Just give the opportunity.

Yeah.
I would always feel guilty.
But then it's like, well, you'vebeen on tour for six weeks.
Watch the TV show.

Larry (43:21):
Yeah.
So if you could fix one thing inthe world, you had a magic wand.
You could change it, fixit, what would it be?

The climate, climate change, you know?
I just worry.
We have so many problems withfascism and racism and, sexism and
anti-gay, like all of these things.
My friends always are like,why are you so surprised?
Yeah.
This has been around forever.
And it just will nevercease to surprise me.
'Cause I'm like, that's just so dumb.

Larry (43:45):
Yeah.

But if we don't have a planet to live on, what are we gonna do?
The first problem needs to be fixed.

Larry (43:51):
Yeah.
The first problem, you're right.
Well, now there's the big question.

Mm-hmm.

Larry (43:54):
Toilet paper over or under my friend?

Gosh.
My husband called me a psychopath.

Larry (43:59):
Huh?

Because I thought it should be under.

Larry (44:01):
He's right.
You're outta your mind.

I didn't know that was a thing.

Larry (44:03):
It's over.

Yeah.
Well, in my mind though,

Larry (44:05):
That's in my mind, it's over.

It should be under.

Larry (44:07):
Mm-hmm.

But I was also a person that like, I could use scissors when
I was young, perfectly, but just usingmy, pointer finger and my middle finger.
And I remember being like broughtinto the office like, We think
Nicole has a learning disability.
And I'm like, but I cut betterthan anybody here because I
use two different fingers.
Things make sense to me in ways thatdon't make sense to others, but I

(44:29):
still get 'em done the same way.

Larry (44:31):
Well, that's a great lesson learned.
Thank you so much.
How do we find you?

@ Nicole Atkins (44:34):
Nicole Atkins.
Nicoleatkins.com
I

Larry (44:37):
really appreciate you time.

Oh, and I have a
Patreon too, and it'scalled Natkins Funhouse

Larry (44:41):
Natkins Funhouse.

Yeah.

Larry (44:43):
I really appreciate it.

Thanks for coming over

Larry (44:45):
Thank you for having me.

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