November 4, 2025 • 31 mins
What happens when the labels get louder than your own voice? In this episode of Just Women Talking Shit, Jacquelynn gets real about identity loss, burnout, and mental health—the moments when “mom,” “partner,” or “coach” start to drown out you. Through honest storytelling and practical mindset tools, you’ll learn how to separate who you are from what you do, rebuild self-trust, and find clarity again.
She shares three actionable steps to help you reconnect with yourself: remember who you were before the noise with a quick journal prompt, audit your mental inputs with a 24-hour detox, and use a five-second rule to take small, brave action that reignites momentum. Expect relatable examples, laughter, and grounded advice for women in transition, healing, or evolution.
If you’ve ever asked, “Who am I beneath all this?”—this episode is your sign to begin again. Follow Just Women Talking Shit for more real conversations about womanhood, mental health, and personal growth.
Buzzsprout - Let's get your podcast launched!Start for FREE
Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.
🌿 Ready to go deeper?
Join the waitlist for Wild Women Who Wander 2026 — the retreat for women ready to drop the masks, reclaim their power, and connect with their most authentic selves. 👉 Fill out the the Google Form HERE.
📲 Let’s stay connected:
- Follow on Instagram: @justwomentalkingshit and @jacquelynncotten
- Email your stories, questions, or advice requests: jwtspodcast@gmail.com
- Support the show by becoming a monthly subscriber HERE.
Disclaimer: This podcast is for entertainment and informational purposes only. The views, opinions, and discussions expressed by the hosts and guests are their own and do not constitute professional advice or services. Listeners should not rely on the content as a substitute for consultation with qualified professionals in areas such as medical, legal, financial, or mental health matters. Always seek the advice of an appropriate licensed professional for any questions or concerns you may have.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
Hello, beautiful souls.
Welcome back to Just WomenTalking Shit.
Can you believe that we arealready at episode 125?
I say already.
Now this thing's been going on ahot minute, but y'all know me,
I've been inconsistent AF and sobut we still like we're here
125.
Like what?
How freaking cool is that?
(00:21):
Um, if you've been here sincethe beginning, seriously, thank
you.
I cannot tell you how much itmeans to me that you keep on
coming back and that you sharethese episodes with friends,
with family, or even if you justkeep them to yourself.
You're listening, and I just Igotta say thank you from one
homegirl to another.
If you're new, welcome, welcome,welcome.
(00:43):
Around here, I feel like we keepit real and we talk about you
know the stuff that most peopleavoid, and my goal is to help us
all just grow through this messtogether.
Not just go through it, but growthrough this mess because, well,
life be crazy, is it not?
Today we are talking aboutsomething that I know that a lot
(01:06):
of us have been feeling lately.
Um, and it's like this sense ofI don't even know if I know who
I am anymore.
Whether, you know, it'smotherhood, work, heartbreak,
healing, or just I don't know,the noise of being a woman or or
being human, right?
(01:26):
In this world where I feel likeit's really fucking easy to lose
track of who you are underneathit all.
So this episode is really aboutreclaiming you, the version of
you who existed before the worldtold you who you were supposed
to be.
And my hope for you is that bythe end of this episode, you'll
(01:47):
have three really doable stepsto start finding that person
again.
Um now I say all this as I seeum pictures appear on my
television.
I've got like, you know, Amazonpictures that play across the
fire stick screensaver.
Um, and I see all of our kids,and I feel like having kids is
(02:09):
such a good example of one,losing yourself, yeah, in the
identities that come with beinga parent.
Like it's so easy for kids tonot even know that you are a
person outside of being mom ordad.
Like it probably blows our kids'minds when they find out that,
like, oh, we have interests, wehave feelings, we don't want to
(02:32):
just clean up after you all thefucking time.
We have things we want to do, wewant to be respected, we want to
feel pursued, we want to, youknow, still chip away at those
dreams that we had when we werelittle so we can be what we
wanted to be when we grow up,right?
But it's very interesting if youare a parent because you are
helping people become whothey're meant to be, and all of
(02:56):
a sudden you are in a wayreparenting yourself.
Everything that you didn't likein childhood, hopefully,
hopefully you're trying tocorrect that in in their lives
by helping them discover whothey are and removing the shame
or you know, stigmas that mightbe socially impressed upon them
because there's such a pressureto fit in to be like everybody
(03:20):
else to keep up with theGenesis, right?
So, um I'm excited.
I'm excited about this episode,and I hope that you find such
great value in it, and if youdo, be sure to share it with
someone that you care about sothat she or he, um, and if you
(03:40):
are really listening, mystepson, you know who you are?
Tell me that you heard thisshout out because I'm not
completely convinced that youlisten to this all the time.
But that would blow my mind ifyou really do.
Apparently, one of our kidslistens to my podcast, and I
just never saw it coming,especially him being a boy.
But anywho, now that I've liketalked about that too much and
(04:03):
and made this a little awkward,let's jump right in.
I want to think back to in my20s, especially, like late 20s,
and um, I'm now mid-30s, I'm 36,um, which is wild, close to 40,
right?
The older you get, I think theless of a fuck you give.
But the older you get, the moreyou learn yourself and you
become yourself and youpersonally evolve, right?
(04:26):
But I remember a few years ago,like I hit a point where I did
not recognize myself, and thishappened again like earlier this
year.
I had a complete fuckingmeltdown, which is why these
episodes kind of came to a halt.
I had gotten in a car accident,I uh I never went to the doctor
for my foot.
I'm pretty sure it was almostbroken though.
(04:48):
But we're just gonna go with it,it was fractured, it was
sprained beyond life imaginable,as far as I was concerned.
My foot still hurts, and thishappened in June, and it is now
November, just to put thingsinto perspective.
But I had like just I I had lostmyself and I had started
drinking and I had starteddisconnecting with my husband,
(05:09):
and my husband was disconnectingwith me, he was drinking more,
and and we were just kind ofgoing in this volatile cycle of
we both needed help and we wereboth screaming, but we couldn't
hear the other person because weboth were crying for help,
right?
Now, I say that, not saying thathe was like being a bad dad or
(05:29):
being a bad partner.
I think I just have the tendencyto push a person away, and so he
was coping the best he could.
Hopefully that makes sense.
However, you know, I was showingup, is what I realized.
I was showing up for everyoneelse.
You know, I was pouring myselfinto my clients, still pouring
myself into my family, going andtraveling and seeing clients,
(05:49):
meeting them in person, tryingto get more involved in like our
little community around here,taking the gifts of the pool,
trying to really get out of mycomfort zone by talking to
people.
But I really I couldn't rememberlike when was the last time that
I'd shown up for me.
Ever since my mental health hadspiraled, you know, I was going
from making like what I wouldconsider good money, especially
living in the south, growing upon food stamps, uh, not having
(06:13):
two fucking nickels to rubtogether, right?
To going back to felt like mycareer was my career in coaching
was taking off and uh um I wasexcited about it, but it all
really backfired on me.
Uh had three situations, um,three clients who became a pain
in my ass who wanted refunds andweren't entitled refunds because
(06:37):
when you work with a coach oryou work with a service where
their time is invested or themoney is used for the experience
and and you do like pay it lateroptions.
So for instance, one that youmight be familiar with is like a
firm or uh I'm trying to thinkof another one.
Klarna is another one after pay,but I had started making really
(07:00):
good money because I wasoffering these ways for people
to work with me.
I could get paid up front, theywould make small monthly
payments, and it was theirunderstanding that the money
they invested was to anothercompany, they owed them that
money.
I I my mental health spiraledreal quickly when I started
(07:22):
getting a couple of people whowanted to file disputes with my
merchant, saying that they wereowed money and legally,
rightfully, and integrity-wise,in my opinion, they were not
owed anything.
They were disgruntled people whodon't put in the work, who
honestly were just living insuch scarcity that they were
(07:45):
they were wanting to get thismoney back, and and it's just
that's not the way it works.
So it did something to me.
I felt like I was like I was Iwas I was hurt because the
people that went and did thesethings and and and wanted to,
you know, ask for the moneyback, I'd been I'd known for
(08:05):
quite some time.
I'd done numerous favors for,had been in my programs, had
attended things, had I hadgifted and sent to them gifts,
you know, had people delivercoffee to them, to their house,
um, birthday gifts, like when Isay I went above and beyond, it
still hurts my feelings that ithappened.
(08:27):
And and I realized after a lotof reflection, because I was
real quick to back off, back offcoaching and say, I'll finish
with the clients I have, butmaybe this just isn't for me
because I felt like I had I'dfailed.
Like, why else would thesepeople do this if if I wasn't a
terrible person?
All of my old programmingstarted to fucking kick back in.
(08:47):
And so I pulled back and mymental health was shit.
I was just over-serving, um,overserving, being underserved
myself, and I didn't know whatto do.
I was just spiraling shortlyinto the year I, you know, after
having so many issues with my mylike my personality, my I was
(09:08):
staying depressed, my anxietywas on fire, like I was getting
I gained a bunch of weight, allthese things, right?
I decided that I needed toreally talk to somebody because
it was starting to scare me.
The thoughts that were runningthrough my head whenever I felt
like on paper I should befulfilled.
It looks like I've got this, youknow, beautiful, perfect life,
and and it is, it's beautiful.
It uh nothing's perfect,obviously, but I was starting to
(09:31):
recognize that I was theproblem.
So I wanted to get down to theroot of the problem.
The root of the problem was someunderlying health issues, some
underlying mental health issuesas well that I just didn't know
about.
And so since then, I've beenseeing a therapist.
I have really been figuring outwho I am, like getting back to
the core of who who would I bewithout others' opinions?
(09:55):
Who would I be if I'd beenraised out in the wild without
influences from outside sources,right?
I, you know, long story short, Iam bipolar and I've got extreme
anxiety.
I think that I could have aborderline personality disorder
or that something of thatnature.
Now, if you and we'll get intothis at some point, because I
(10:16):
know the story needs to beheard, and it'll help you get to
know me better, but it'll alsohelp people out there who are
struggling to talk about neglector emotional neglect that they
experienced in their childhoods.
I know that it'll help us allstart to heal as adults from
these things that were, youknow, bestowed upon us and our
nervous systems in a sense.
(10:38):
So that's coming, that's cominglater.
But doing all this inner workhas gotten me to the spot where
I can now, I can now reflectback and really do know that I
was showing up for everybodyelse.
I was showing up for my clients,I was showing up for my family,
for my community.
But when?
When was the last time that I'dreally shown up for me?
Right.
So I remember like severalmornings just sitting in my car.
(11:00):
It got to where I would just sitin my car after dropping the
kids off, holding my coffee insilence, and I would just sit
there, have a million thoughtsracing through my head, you
know, thinking about how deathseemed more inviting than
living.
And that was just nonsense to mebecause I have so much to live
for.
I got my rainbow baby, mydaughter is beautiful and
(11:21):
thriving.
I have three beautiful bonussons, I have an amazing husband.
I live in a nicer house than Iever could have imagined I'd
live in, you know, when I was akid, now I was an adult.
I've got the perfect littlefamily and the perfect little
life that I little Jacquelinebegged for, right?
And so, how?
How how was I feeling blankinside?
(11:42):
That's what I had to figure out.
Like, if someone had asked mewhat I wanted when I was feeling
this way, I I don't know thatI'd be able to say what was
lighting me up.
You know, the clients werestarting to drain me.
My podcast was starting to drainme.
It felt like more work than itwas worth.
You know, I don't get a shit tonof downloads.
Like, I I don't know much aboutSEO, all these things, right?
(12:03):
And so it was real easy to likejust let things go instead of
grow through it.
And so I really, I really don'tknow what I would have answered
if or if I would have had ananswer.
You know, like my answer istypically always just like, I
just really want to make adifference and I want to help
people.
But you know, that that scaredme, to be honest, because I
realized that no one was comingback to hand me my identity,
(12:26):
right?
Getting married, being a mom,being a podcast host, leading
retreats, doing all thesethings, they're great.
But if you are lacking personalidentity and trying to create it
through creating otherexperiences and illusions like
busyness versus feeling good inyour own body and being able to
(12:48):
sit with your own stillness inthe company of yourself and know
that even if a flock of yappybitches walks by, or even if the
mean mom group talks about you,like that has nothing to do with
you.
Being able to tap into thatlevel of security within
yourself and your identity takesa lot of work.
Takes a lot of questions, ittakes a lot of just yucky stuff,
(13:10):
yucky questions, whether it bewriting or you know, going and
beating the shit out of a pillowor screaming into a pillow or
signing up for one of my WomenWho Wonder experiences and
getting out of your comfortzone, traveling to a new city,
meeting new women, like whateverthat looks like for you to be
able to put yourself back outthere and figuring out what is
(13:30):
it that you like, what is itthat you don't like, what are
your non-negotiables?
What are your boundaries?
What are the things you want toaccomplish in this lifetime?
How do you want to make peoplefeel, you know, after you have
gone on to whatever comes afterlife?
Like all these things are youridentity.
(13:51):
So I want you to think aboutidentity versus roles.
Your roles are not youridentity, your labels are not
your identity.
Whatever it is you call yourselfmom, wife, host, business owner,
that's not your identity, right?
So I found myself just reallywanting to feel like myself
again.
Like I wanted to reclaim herpiece by piece, you know.
(14:11):
I I might have said it earlier,but like, who would I have been
without others' opinions?
Who would I have been if I wasraised in the wild?
Who would I have been withoutother people's influences,
without society, you know,making me feel shame, really
being able to fall in love withmyself whole, you know, fully,
truthfully, without beatingmyself up all the time.
(14:32):
Like, who would she be?
I'm just curious.
And and it kind of, for me atleast, it helped me start
reclaiming myself.
So I have three steps for you.
Three steps for you to really beable to reclaim you or get back
in touch with you, get back intouch with you know, the woman
(14:52):
you've been wanting to become,right?
Whether that be the woman youwere, the woman you are, or the
woman you want to be.
That's gonna be totally up toyou.
And y'all know my stance on Ifeel like that we are forever
evolving.
You are always going topersonally evolve.
So, like, you can't really saythat who you were when you were
16 is exactly who you are nowthat you're 36.
(15:17):
We, I mean, I don't want to beheld accountable for 16-year-old
douchebag me.
I don't know about you.
Like, she was she there's a lotshe didn't know.
But I know that 36-year-oldJacqueline probably won't be the
same exact person at 50 onceshe's had more life experiences
and has had more time to evolve.
So, three steps.
Let's start with step numberone.
(15:39):
Remember who the fuck you werebefore all the noise.
Seriously, let's start simple.
Like, who were you before youstarted shrinking yourself to
fit other people's expectations?
I can literally think back towhenever I was a little girl.
And for whatever reason, Iwanted to sing, I wanted to
(15:59):
dance, I was definitely that kidwho was kind of labeled, you
know, theatric and too much.
Oh, I just got full-bodiedchills saying this because the
woman that I became, or theadolescent that later on became
a woman, totally opposite, shy,too scared to get up in front of
the class to to present myproject, didn't have very many
(16:23):
friends, got picked on a lot.
I was a huge victim of bullying.
You know, I I was just not anoutspoken individual.
I did not go out to do socialthings with friends.
I was scared to socialize.
I stayed home a majority of mylife.
(16:43):
I was scared of the world,needless to say.
But when I was little, I canlook back and I can see how
spunky I was.
I can see how I pranced aroundwanting to be a gymnast.
And you know, before I startedbeing told who I was, um is who
(17:05):
I've actually turned out to bemore like the older I get.
So approaching 40, I'm more likefive-year-old me.
Like my my energy and my funnessand my spirit, because you know,
I think that fundamentally as achild, when you know, you are
just so curious and fun and youknow, asking all the questions
(17:29):
and just life is magical that wedon't necessarily lose that.
We just we we we kind of hide itbecause you know, we're told to
grow up or that's not real life,you know.
And we're taught to diminishlike this this mystery and this
magnetism and this magicalnessof life that we all we all start
(17:51):
out with.
It's just we are taught to todim that shine, right?
And so I find it so interesting.
And that's why I just want toask you again like who were you
before you started shrinkingyourself to fit other people's
expectations?
Like, what did that version ofyou love to do?
What made her laugh until shecried?
I think back being like youknow, younger and hanging out
(18:12):
with my cousins, like we had somuch fun doing absolutely
nothing because we were just themost authentic kids.
We picked on each other, yeah,we would fight, but we made up,
we'd wrestle, we we'd hadadventures, we'd go to our
picnics, we play games outside,we'd have Kool-Aid stands and
(18:33):
the best memories of my lifebefore life started getting like
really tough and forcing us tobe somebody else to grow up too
quickly.
But what did she dream aboutbefore someone told her to be
realistic?
Now, when you have time today, Iwant you to spend just five
minutes, okay?
Literally set a timer on yourphone, or if if you're old
(18:55):
school, you know, maybe you gotone of those little kitchen
timers.
I don't know.
I think that they're awesome.
Actually, I want to get one ofthose because I think it's a
really fun way to do tours andstuff around the house with
kids.
Side note, somebody mark thatdown, but or even like a you
know, the timer uh on yourmicrowave or stove or something
like that that works too.
Set that timer and voice note orjournal this.
(19:18):
The question is, and this iswhat you're gonna write on.
Who was I before life got soloud?
And just intuitively letyourself feel and talk about
that, you know, feel it andspeak on it through a voice note
for five minutes, or feel it andwrite it on paper or on your
your laptop, you know, for thosestraight five minutes.
(19:39):
Don't stop until you hear thetimer.
And that's where you're gonnastart to reconnect with yourself
because she's still in there,she's still in there and she is
just dying to get out.
Moving along to number two,start auditing the voices that
you're listening to.
You repeating things that you'veheard in the past or that you
heard today, or just those notnice, self-inflicted judgments
(20:04):
that you keep repeating in yourhead because you're anxious or
overwhelmed or maybe just alittle bit insecure.
So audit those voices thatyou're listening to, uh, both
internally and externally.
Because here's the truth (20:16):
most of us are living by voices that
aren't even ours.
The friend who means well, justan example, like the influencer
you compare yourself to, or umeven the parent still living
rent-free in your head, thoseare the voices that we need to
be limiting and need to replacewith goodness.
(20:38):
So, in order for your brain tofeel good, in order for you to
be able to think clearly, you'vegot to be able to take inventory
and keep putting good stuff intothat brain.
For me, you know, I likepodcasts, I like books, I like
comedy, I like writing my ownstuff, writing jokes, trying to
(20:59):
work on a book, right?
And it forces me personally touse the creativity, which is
sometimes those voices are justlike if you were being creative
and tuning into what makes youhappy, doing more things you
love, then you wouldn't havetime to think about that.
So just pause and ask yourself,you know, whose voice is driving
my decisions right now?
(21:19):
Is it mine or is it someoneelse's?
And then for the next 24 hours,I really challenge you to do
like an input detox almost.
Meaning like no comparing, nomindless scrolling, no
overthinking what other peoplemight think, right?
No sending that text and thensitting on it like for you know
(21:41):
five minutes going, oh my god,why'd I send that?
I was so stupid.
She's not gonna respond.
They don't care, they don't wantto talk to you.
Did I wait too long?
What did they think?
Have they read it?
None of that.
No sitting there for fiveminutes before you send a text
overanalyzing, just send thefucking text and then go put the
phone away.
Just listen to your voice again.
(22:01):
Quit letting your judgment getclouded by all these people with
their own opinions that youdidn't ask for, most likely,
living rent-free in thatbeautiful fucking brain of
yours.
That is where clarity starts toreturn.
Step three, take one brave, tinyaction.
(22:22):
Okay?
We're overthinking it.
Once you've remembered who youwere and you have started to
quiet the noise, that's whenit's time to move.
Okay.
Take Mel Robin's five-secondrule, for instance.
Don't give your time to yourselftime to talk yourself out of it,
because that's the way the brainis wired, is to protect you
from, you know, scary,unfamiliar new things.
(22:45):
The brain feels safe withrepetition, with what it knows,
with its comfort zone.
So once you've remembered whoyou are and once you've quieted
the noise, it really is.
It's time to move.
Take her five-second rule andsay five, four, three, two, one.
Launch, baby.
Go for it.
Get up, go for the walk.
Don't give yourself time tothink about it.
Five, four, three, two, one.
Walk up to that person and sayhello that you've been wanting
(23:08):
to talk to.
5-4-3-2-1.
Start recording that first voicenote for your first podcast
episode.
5-4-3-2-1.
Hit post.
Don't think twice about it.
And just know, like you know,it's going to reach the right
people.
So send the email.
It doesn't have to be some biglap massive leap, right?
Like it can be one brave tinyaction that reminds you who the
(23:31):
hell you are.
Um, if you're not gonna send theemail, say no.
If you usually are always sayingyes or like uh people pleasing,
knowing that it doesn't, youknow, it's not something you
want to do or you'd really liketo say no, start saying no.
Sign up for the thing, go for awalk alone.
Speak the truth before you allowyourself to come up with what
(23:52):
somebody wants to hear.
If I say no, is it gonna upsetthem?
No, speak your truth before youeven allow yourself to talk
yourself out of it.
Speak the truth that you've beenswallowing, simply put.
Because confidence does not comefirst, action does.
Is you know, just like going tothe gym, like the motivation
comes afterwards.
At first, you're not yourhealthiest, you're not used to
(24:15):
this new routine.
So you have to do it for alittle while.
You'll see some results, you'llstart to notice momentum picking
up.
Oh my gosh, I'm walking faster.
Oh my gosh, I went from afive-pound dumbbell to a
10-pound dumbbell.
Like you can see the progress,and so therefore, you're
motivated to keep going.
So, confidence and motivationdoes not come first, action
(24:39):
does.
And that's how you start torebuild your trust within
yourself is just by one tinypromise at a time.
You don't have to make all thesebig promises to yourself and
then get bummed out when thingsdon't happen quickly.
Let's recap all these steps realquick, okay?
Remember who you were before thenoise.
That's number one.
Number two, audit the voicesyou're listening to.
(25:01):
Number three, take one bravetiny action.
But here's like your realchallenge for the week, okay?
Like, Jacqueline, you alreadyhave us three things to do.
I promise, it's not gonna bethat bad.
I want you to do one thing thatreminds you of who you are,
okay?
This doesn't have to cost money.
For some of us, it might be.
(25:21):
You know, I haven't gotten mynails done in like a year and a
half.
Mama, if you got the money andyou got your bills paid and you
feel good about it, go treatyourself.
Okay.
What one, you know, thing thatreminds you of who you are could
be picking up the guitar.
Like I've got to do that everyonce in a while.
And when I do, I feel so good.
I feel so good playing guitar,singing my music, and just
strumming to my heart's contentor until my fingers fall off.
(25:44):
Okay.
Could be going for the walk.
We mentioned walks a few times,could be just cooking a meal
with your kids or with yourpartner, or really just, you
know, taking time to be presentwith your puppy, with your dog.
Could be getting back out in thegarden.
Like, I don't know what it lookslike for you, but there is
something that you can do thisweek that is going to remind you
(26:06):
of who you are.
And when you do that, I want youto take a picture of what you're
doing, bonus points if I get tosee your beautiful face, and I
want you to tag JacquelineCotton and just women talking
shit on Instagram so that I cancelebrate you.
I will repost it in my stories,and we will all celebrate you
(26:26):
because you deserve.
You deserve to feel celebratedjust as you are, authentically,
imperfect, unapologetically,okay, messy bun and all, mama.
You really might just inspiresomebody else to start
reclaiming themselves too.
That's what's so beautiful aboutthis podcast.
That's what's so beautiful aboutsisterhood in general and just
(26:48):
spreading light and positivityis that when you show up and
shine your light, you'reinspiring other people to do the
same thing.
Man.
125 episodes, though.
I like, I don't know.
I don't know what it is about125.
You know, when I when I reached50, I was like, oh my God.
And then I reached 100.
I'm like, holy shit.
And now I'm at 125.
(27:10):
And I feel like my next one isgonna be 150, and and then we'll
jump to 200.
And I don't know, it's justsomeone who that, someone who
that, what was that?
Someone like myself who has hadcommitment issues through being
taught inconsistent um behaviorsand patterns throughout my life.
(27:31):
It just it's been so good to,even though I'm not always
consistently posting, to knowthat consistency can just look
like showing up, you know, inthe good spurts, and then
knowing that it's not, it's nota plateau, you know, it's not
downhill, it's just we took alittle break and and now we're
(27:53):
picking back up.
It's kind of like on a rollercoaster, you know, when they go
up, up, up, up, up, up, up, andthen they level out for a
minute.
And then they go up, up, up, up,up, up, up.
Yeah, I just leveled out for aminute, right?
So it's I I just have to givemyself a little pat on the back
that um that this thing is stillfucking going.
To be honest, part of it notalways being super consistent is
(28:15):
that I have self-funded thispodcast since 2021.
I've never asked anybody forsupport.
I've looked into Patreon, I'velooked into some other things,
but I've never just put it outthere that maybe people want to
help.
Maybe people want to be part ofthis.
And so there have been monthswhere when I'm not, you know,
(28:36):
making money because my mentalhealth and my chronic illnesses
get the best of me sometimes.
There are just numerous thingsthat that play into to me not
having the fun.
So I am, I'm gonna put it outthere that people want to help,
that people want to give threeor five dollars.
And if you do, I will give youuh a really personal shout out
(28:57):
and let everybody know how howfreaking grateful I am for you.
But I'm gonna open the floor up.
I'm gonna open the floor up forwhat I preach all the time, is
and that's that that we can allcome together and make beautiful
things.
And so if you really enjoy thisshow and you want to support the
show, you can just donate.
There'll be a link below or youcan look up top.
But I also want to remind youthat if you don't want to
(29:19):
support the show or you don'thave you know three dollars to
to throw around right now, threedollars a month, that's okay
too.
There are other things you cando.
You can totally leave a reviewon Apple Podcasts, you can send
this episode to your friends,you can um rate this show and
give it all the stars onSpotify.
(29:41):
You can tag us in your storiesso that other people can see our
content so that they can listento the podcast.
You can write the show whetheryou want to do it through uh
Buzz Sprout where there's like afan mail option, or you want to
send an email directly to us atJWTS podcast at gmail.com, you
(30:04):
can send in your questions,whether it's for me, whether it
is for an upcoming expert, youhave like a love and
relationships question.
If you have a question aboutwomen's health, if you have a
question about hypnotherapy, ifyou have a question about diets,
nutrition, sex, like mentalhealth, anything to do with
personally evolving as a woman,send the questions in or send
(30:28):
your stories in.
Maybe you have a reallybeautiful story of how this
amazing thing happened in yourlife, or um, you could inspire
someone.
Um, or maybe you just need alittle pep in your step and you
need, you know, to share, sharewhat you're going through right
now and just receive love fromthe community.
Send us, send us some mail.
(30:50):
We would love.
And by we, I refer to we becauseI'm just manifesting this giant
team one day.
But right now it's just me.
Not even gonna trip on y'all.
It's just me.
But I say we because I'mspeaking it into existence.
So we would love to receive yourmail, your questions, if you
need advice, if you want to givea tip or actionable step um to
(31:11):
others, if you want to, youknow, recommend a subject that
we should cover, if you want tosend a guest our way.
These are all ways that you canhelp the show, okay?
Because the goal is to take thison the road.
Would have done it a bunch, Imean, a lot sooner.
A bunch.
Would have done it a bunchsooner.
But, you know, like I told you,uh, I went on hiatus and I was
(31:33):
just feeling real sorry formyself and being a little
fucking bitch.
But I'm back and I'm donefeeling sorry for myself because
I felt stupid.
Once I came to, I was like,bitch, you just wasted so much
time.
I'm glad you felt like you got agood break, but we're not going
to just like self-retreat likewe've always done when we know
(31:54):
that's not working, right?
So the podcast started as me,you know, just like trying to
get a sense of my own life, butit's really turning this whole
community of women who show up,share the hard stuff, and grow
anyway.
And if this episode spoke toyou, I just I ask that you know,
you share it with a friend,someone who might need that
reminder today.
And if you crave a deeperconnection and transformation, I
(32:15):
really incentivize you to checkout the weird women who wonder
experience, which is going to bedown in the show notes.
It's my annual self discoveryand sisterhood retreat where we
take these conversations offlineand do the real work together in
person.
So you can find all thosedetails in the show notes.
And until next time, my kids areabout to walk in, so we gotta we
gotta cut this short.
(32:35):
Keep talking your shit, keepgrowing, and keep remembering
who the fuck you are.
Hello, beautiful souls.
Welcome back to Just WomenTalking Shit.
Can you believe that we arealready at episode 125?
I say already.
Now this thing's been going on ahot minute, but y'all know me,
I've been inconsistent AF and sobut we still like we're here
125.
Like what?
How freaking cool is that?
(00:21):
Um, if you've been here sincethe beginning, seriously, thank
you.
I cannot tell you how much itmeans to me that you keep on
coming back and that you sharethese episodes with friends,
with family, or even if you justkeep them to yourself.
You're listening, and I just Igotta say thank you from one
homegirl to another.
If you're new, welcome, welcome,welcome.
(00:43):
Around here, I feel like we keepit real and we talk about you
know the stuff that most peopleavoid, and my goal is to help us
all just grow through this messtogether.
Not just go through it, but growthrough this mess because, well,
life be crazy, is it not?
Today we are talking aboutsomething that I know that a lot
(01:06):
of us have been feeling lately.
Um, and it's like this sense ofI don't even know if I know who
I am anymore.
Whether, you know, it'smotherhood, work, heartbreak,
healing, or just I don't know,the noise of being a woman or or
being human, right?
(01:26):
In this world where I feel likeit's really fucking easy to lose
track of who you are underneathit all.
So this episode is really aboutreclaiming you, the version of
you who existed before the worldtold you who you were supposed
to be.
And my hope for you is that bythe end of this episode, you'll
(01:47):
have three really doable stepsto start finding that person
again.
Um now I say all this as I seeum pictures appear on my
television.
I've got like, you know, Amazonpictures that play across the
fire stick screensaver.
Um, and I see all of our kids,and I feel like having kids is
(02:09):
such a good example of one,losing yourself, yeah, in the
identities that come with beinga parent.
Like it's so easy for kids tonot even know that you are a
person outside of being mom ordad.
Like it probably blows our kids'minds when they find out that,
like, oh, we have interests, wehave feelings, we don't want to
(02:32):
just clean up after you all thefucking time.
We have things we want to do, wewant to be respected, we want to
feel pursued, we want to, youknow, still chip away at those
dreams that we had when we werelittle so we can be what we
wanted to be when we grow up,right?
But it's very interesting if youare a parent because you are
helping people become whothey're meant to be, and all of
(02:56):
a sudden you are in a wayreparenting yourself.
Everything that you didn't likein childhood, hopefully,
hopefully you're trying tocorrect that in in their lives
by helping them discover whothey are and removing the shame
or you know, stigmas that mightbe socially impressed upon them
because there's such a pressureto fit in to be like everybody
(03:20):
else to keep up with theGenesis, right?
So, um I'm excited.
I'm excited about this episode,and I hope that you find such
great value in it, and if youdo, be sure to share it with
someone that you care about sothat she or he, um, and if you
(03:40):
are really listening, mystepson, you know who you are?
Tell me that you heard thisshout out because I'm not
completely convinced that youlisten to this all the time.
But that would blow my mind ifyou really do.
Apparently, one of our kidslistens to my podcast, and I
just never saw it coming,especially him being a boy.
But anywho, now that I've liketalked about that too much and
(04:03):
and made this a little awkward,let's jump right in.
I want to think back to in my20s, especially, like late 20s,
and um, I'm now mid-30s, I'm 36,um, which is wild, close to 40,
right?
The older you get, I think theless of a fuck you give.
But the older you get, the moreyou learn yourself and you
become yourself and youpersonally evolve, right?
(04:26):
But I remember a few years ago,like I hit a point where I did
not recognize myself, and thishappened again like earlier this
year.
I had a complete fuckingmeltdown, which is why these
episodes kind of came to a halt.
I had gotten in a car accident,I uh I never went to the doctor
for my foot.
I'm pretty sure it was almostbroken though.
(04:48):
But we're just gonna go with it,it was fractured, it was
sprained beyond life imaginable,as far as I was concerned.
My foot still hurts, and thishappened in June, and it is now
November, just to put thingsinto perspective.
But I had like just I I had lostmyself and I had started
drinking and I had starteddisconnecting with my husband,
(05:09):
and my husband was disconnectingwith me, he was drinking more,
and and we were just kind ofgoing in this volatile cycle of
we both needed help and we wereboth screaming, but we couldn't
hear the other person because weboth were crying for help,
right?
Now, I say that, not saying thathe was like being a bad dad or
(05:29):
being a bad partner.
I think I just have the tendencyto push a person away, and so he
was coping the best he could.
Hopefully that makes sense.
However, you know, I was showingup, is what I realized.
I was showing up for everyoneelse.
You know, I was pouring myselfinto my clients, still pouring
myself into my family, going andtraveling and seeing clients,
(05:49):
meeting them in person, tryingto get more involved in like our
little community around here,taking the gifts of the pool,
trying to really get out of mycomfort zone by talking to
people.
But I really I couldn't rememberlike when was the last time that
I'd shown up for me.
Ever since my mental health hadspiraled, you know, I was going
from making like what I wouldconsider good money, especially
living in the south, growing upon food stamps, uh, not having
(06:13):
two fucking nickels to rubtogether, right?
To going back to felt like mycareer was my career in coaching
was taking off and uh um I wasexcited about it, but it all
really backfired on me.
Uh had three situations, um,three clients who became a pain
in my ass who wanted refunds andweren't entitled refunds because
(06:37):
when you work with a coach oryou work with a service where
their time is invested or themoney is used for the experience
and and you do like pay it lateroptions.
So for instance, one that youmight be familiar with is like a
firm or uh I'm trying to thinkof another one.
Klarna is another one after pay,but I had started making really
(07:00):
good money because I wasoffering these ways for people
to work with me.
I could get paid up front, theywould make small monthly
payments, and it was theirunderstanding that the money
they invested was to anothercompany, they owed them that
money.
I I my mental health spiraledreal quickly when I started
(07:22):
getting a couple of people whowanted to file disputes with my
merchant, saying that they wereowed money and legally,
rightfully, and integrity-wise,in my opinion, they were not
owed anything.
They were disgruntled people whodon't put in the work, who
honestly were just living insuch scarcity that they were
(07:45):
they were wanting to get thismoney back, and and it's just
that's not the way it works.
So it did something to me.
I felt like I was like I was Iwas I was hurt because the
people that went and did thesethings and and and wanted to,
you know, ask for the moneyback, I'd been I'd known for
(08:05):
quite some time.
I'd done numerous favors for,had been in my programs, had
attended things, had I hadgifted and sent to them gifts,
you know, had people delivercoffee to them, to their house,
um, birthday gifts, like when Isay I went above and beyond, it
still hurts my feelings that ithappened.
(08:27):
And and I realized after a lotof reflection, because I was
real quick to back off, back offcoaching and say, I'll finish
with the clients I have, butmaybe this just isn't for me
because I felt like I had I'dfailed.
Like, why else would thesepeople do this if if I wasn't a
terrible person?
All of my old programmingstarted to fucking kick back in.
(08:47):
And so I pulled back and mymental health was shit.
I was just over-serving, um,overserving, being underserved
myself, and I didn't know whatto do.
I was just spiraling shortlyinto the year I, you know, after
having so many issues with my mylike my personality, my I was
(09:08):
staying depressed, my anxietywas on fire, like I was getting
I gained a bunch of weight, allthese things, right?
I decided that I needed toreally talk to somebody because
it was starting to scare me.
The thoughts that were runningthrough my head whenever I felt
like on paper I should befulfilled.
It looks like I've got this, youknow, beautiful, perfect life,
and and it is, it's beautiful.
It uh nothing's perfect,obviously, but I was starting to
(09:31):
recognize that I was theproblem.
So I wanted to get down to theroot of the problem.
The root of the problem was someunderlying health issues, some
underlying mental health issuesas well that I just didn't know
about.
And so since then, I've beenseeing a therapist.
I have really been figuring outwho I am, like getting back to
the core of who who would I bewithout others' opinions?
(09:55):
Who would I be if I'd beenraised out in the wild without
influences from outside sources,right?
I, you know, long story short, Iam bipolar and I've got extreme
anxiety.
I think that I could have aborderline personality disorder
or that something of thatnature.
Now, if you and we'll get intothis at some point, because I
(10:16):
know the story needs to beheard, and it'll help you get to
know me better, but it'll alsohelp people out there who are
struggling to talk about neglector emotional neglect that they
experienced in their childhoods.
I know that it'll help us allstart to heal as adults from
these things that were, youknow, bestowed upon us and our
nervous systems in a sense.
(10:38):
So that's coming, that's cominglater.
But doing all this inner workhas gotten me to the spot where
I can now, I can now reflectback and really do know that I
was showing up for everybodyelse.
I was showing up for my clients,I was showing up for my family,
for my community.
But when?
When was the last time that I'dreally shown up for me?
Right.
So I remember like severalmornings just sitting in my car.
(11:00):
It got to where I would just sitin my car after dropping the
kids off, holding my coffee insilence, and I would just sit
there, have a million thoughtsracing through my head, you
know, thinking about how deathseemed more inviting than
living.
And that was just nonsense to mebecause I have so much to live
for.
I got my rainbow baby, mydaughter is beautiful and
(11:21):
thriving.
I have three beautiful bonussons, I have an amazing husband.
I live in a nicer house than Iever could have imagined I'd
live in, you know, when I was akid, now I was an adult.
I've got the perfect littlefamily and the perfect little
life that I little Jacquelinebegged for, right?
And so, how?
How how was I feeling blankinside?
(11:42):
That's what I had to figure out.
Like, if someone had asked mewhat I wanted when I was feeling
this way, I I don't know thatI'd be able to say what was
lighting me up.
You know, the clients werestarting to drain me.
My podcast was starting to drainme.
It felt like more work than itwas worth.
You know, I don't get a shit tonof downloads.
Like, I I don't know much aboutSEO, all these things, right?
(12:03):
And so it was real easy to likejust let things go instead of
grow through it.
And so I really, I really don'tknow what I would have answered
if or if I would have had ananswer.
You know, like my answer istypically always just like, I
just really want to make adifference and I want to help
people.
But you know, that that scaredme, to be honest, because I
realized that no one was comingback to hand me my identity,
(12:26):
right?
Getting married, being a mom,being a podcast host, leading
retreats, doing all thesethings, they're great.
But if you are lacking personalidentity and trying to create it
through creating otherexperiences and illusions like
busyness versus feeling good inyour own body and being able to
(12:48):
sit with your own stillness inthe company of yourself and know
that even if a flock of yappybitches walks by, or even if the
mean mom group talks about you,like that has nothing to do with
you.
Being able to tap into thatlevel of security within
yourself and your identity takesa lot of work.
Takes a lot of questions, ittakes a lot of just yucky stuff,
(13:10):
yucky questions, whether it bewriting or you know, going and
beating the shit out of a pillowor screaming into a pillow or
signing up for one of my WomenWho Wonder experiences and
getting out of your comfortzone, traveling to a new city,
meeting new women, like whateverthat looks like for you to be
able to put yourself back outthere and figuring out what is
(13:30):
it that you like, what is itthat you don't like, what are
your non-negotiables?
What are your boundaries?
What are the things you want toaccomplish in this lifetime?
How do you want to make peoplefeel, you know, after you have
gone on to whatever comes afterlife?
Like all these things are youridentity.
(13:51):
So I want you to think aboutidentity versus roles.
Your roles are not youridentity, your labels are not
your identity.
Whatever it is you call yourselfmom, wife, host, business owner,
that's not your identity, right?
So I found myself just reallywanting to feel like myself
again.
Like I wanted to reclaim herpiece by piece, you know.
(14:11):
I I might have said it earlier,but like, who would I have been
without others' opinions?
Who would I have been if I wasraised in the wild?
Who would I have been withoutother people's influences,
without society, you know,making me feel shame, really
being able to fall in love withmyself whole, you know, fully,
truthfully, without beatingmyself up all the time.
(14:32):
Like, who would she be?
I'm just curious.
And and it kind of, for me atleast, it helped me start
reclaiming myself.
So I have three steps for you.
Three steps for you to really beable to reclaim you or get back
in touch with you, get back intouch with you know, the woman
(14:52):
you've been wanting to become,right?
Whether that be the woman youwere, the woman you are, or the
woman you want to be.
That's gonna be totally up toyou.
And y'all know my stance on Ifeel like that we are forever
evolving.
You are always going topersonally evolve.
So, like, you can't really saythat who you were when you were
16 is exactly who you are nowthat you're 36.
(15:17):
We, I mean, I don't want to beheld accountable for 16-year-old
douchebag me.
I don't know about you.
Like, she was she there's a lotshe didn't know.
But I know that 36-year-oldJacqueline probably won't be the
same exact person at 50 onceshe's had more life experiences
and has had more time to evolve.
So, three steps.
Let's start with step numberone.
(15:39):
Remember who the fuck you werebefore all the noise.
Seriously, let's start simple.
Like, who were you before youstarted shrinking yourself to
fit other people's expectations?
I can literally think back towhenever I was a little girl.
And for whatever reason, Iwanted to sing, I wanted to
(15:59):
dance, I was definitely that kidwho was kind of labeled, you
know, theatric and too much.
Oh, I just got full-bodiedchills saying this because the
woman that I became, or theadolescent that later on became
a woman, totally opposite, shy,too scared to get up in front of
the class to to present myproject, didn't have very many
(16:23):
friends, got picked on a lot.
I was a huge victim of bullying.
You know, I I was just not anoutspoken individual.
I did not go out to do socialthings with friends.
I was scared to socialize.
I stayed home a majority of mylife.
(16:43):
I was scared of the world,needless to say.
But when I was little, I canlook back and I can see how
spunky I was.
I can see how I pranced aroundwanting to be a gymnast.
And you know, before I startedbeing told who I was, um is who
(17:05):
I've actually turned out to bemore like the older I get.
So approaching 40, I'm more likefive-year-old me.
Like my my energy and my funnessand my spirit, because you know,
I think that fundamentally as achild, when you know, you are
just so curious and fun and youknow, asking all the questions
(17:29):
and just life is magical that wedon't necessarily lose that.
We just we we we kind of hide itbecause you know, we're told to
grow up or that's not real life,you know.
And we're taught to diminishlike this this mystery and this
magnetism and this magicalnessof life that we all we all start
(17:51):
out with.
It's just we are taught to todim that shine, right?
And so I find it so interesting.
And that's why I just want toask you again like who were you
before you started shrinkingyourself to fit other people's
expectations?
Like, what did that version ofyou love to do?
What made her laugh until shecried?
I think back being like youknow, younger and hanging out
(18:12):
with my cousins, like we had somuch fun doing absolutely
nothing because we were just themost authentic kids.
We picked on each other, yeah,we would fight, but we made up,
we'd wrestle, we we'd hadadventures, we'd go to our
picnics, we play games outside,we'd have Kool-Aid stands and
(18:33):
the best memories of my lifebefore life started getting like
really tough and forcing us tobe somebody else to grow up too
quickly.
But what did she dream aboutbefore someone told her to be
realistic?
Now, when you have time today, Iwant you to spend just five
minutes, okay?
Literally set a timer on yourphone, or if if you're old
(18:55):
school, you know, maybe you gotone of those little kitchen
timers.
I don't know.
I think that they're awesome.
Actually, I want to get one ofthose because I think it's a
really fun way to do tours andstuff around the house with
kids.
Side note, somebody mark thatdown, but or even like a you
know, the timer uh on yourmicrowave or stove or something
like that that works too.
Set that timer and voice note orjournal this.
(19:18):
The question is, and this iswhat you're gonna write on.
Who was I before life got soloud?
And just intuitively letyourself feel and talk about
that, you know, feel it andspeak on it through a voice note
for five minutes, or feel it andwrite it on paper or on your
your laptop, you know, for thosestraight five minutes.
(19:39):
Don't stop until you hear thetimer.
And that's where you're gonnastart to reconnect with yourself
because she's still in there,she's still in there and she is
just dying to get out.
Moving along to number two,start auditing the voices that
you're listening to.
You repeating things that you'veheard in the past or that you
heard today, or just those notnice, self-inflicted judgments
(20:04):
that you keep repeating in yourhead because you're anxious or
overwhelmed or maybe just alittle bit insecure.
So audit those voices thatyou're listening to, uh, both
internally and externally.
Because here's the truth (20:16):
most of us are living by voices that
aren't even ours.
The friend who means well, justan example, like the influencer
you compare yourself to, or umeven the parent still living
rent-free in your head, thoseare the voices that we need to
be limiting and need to replacewith goodness.
(20:38):
So, in order for your brain tofeel good, in order for you to
be able to think clearly, you'vegot to be able to take inventory
and keep putting good stuff intothat brain.
For me, you know, I likepodcasts, I like books, I like
comedy, I like writing my ownstuff, writing jokes, trying to
(20:59):
work on a book, right?
And it forces me personally touse the creativity, which is
sometimes those voices are justlike if you were being creative
and tuning into what makes youhappy, doing more things you
love, then you wouldn't havetime to think about that.
So just pause and ask yourself,you know, whose voice is driving
my decisions right now?
(21:19):
Is it mine or is it someoneelse's?
And then for the next 24 hours,I really challenge you to do
like an input detox almost.
Meaning like no comparing, nomindless scrolling, no
overthinking what other peoplemight think, right?
No sending that text and thensitting on it like for you know
(21:41):
five minutes going, oh my god,why'd I send that?
I was so stupid.
She's not gonna respond.
They don't care, they don't wantto talk to you.
Did I wait too long?
What did they think?
Have they read it?
None of that.
No sitting there for fiveminutes before you send a text
overanalyzing, just send thefucking text and then go put the
phone away.
Just listen to your voice again.
(22:01):
Quit letting your judgment getclouded by all these people with
their own opinions that youdidn't ask for, most likely,
living rent-free in thatbeautiful fucking brain of
yours.
That is where clarity starts toreturn.
Step three, take one brave, tinyaction.
(22:22):
Okay?
We're overthinking it.
Once you've remembered who youwere and you have started to
quiet the noise, that's whenit's time to move.
Okay.
Take Mel Robin's five-secondrule, for instance.
Don't give your time to yourselftime to talk yourself out of it,
because that's the way the brainis wired, is to protect you
from, you know, scary,unfamiliar new things.
(22:45):
The brain feels safe withrepetition, with what it knows,
with its comfort zone.
So once you've remembered whoyou are and once you've quieted
the noise, it really is.
It's time to move.
Take her five-second rule andsay five, four, three, two, one.
Launch, baby.
Go for it.
Get up, go for the walk.
Don't give yourself time tothink about it.
Five, four, three, two, one.
Walk up to that person and sayhello that you've been wanting
(23:08):
to talk to.
5-4-3-2-1.
Start recording that first voicenote for your first podcast
episode.
5-4-3-2-1.
Hit post.
Don't think twice about it.
And just know, like you know,it's going to reach the right
people.
So send the email.
It doesn't have to be some biglap massive leap, right?
Like it can be one brave tinyaction that reminds you who the
(23:31):
hell you are.
Um, if you're not gonna send theemail, say no.
If you usually are always sayingyes or like uh people pleasing,
knowing that it doesn't, youknow, it's not something you
want to do or you'd really liketo say no, start saying no.
Sign up for the thing, go for awalk alone.
Speak the truth before you allowyourself to come up with what
(23:52):
somebody wants to hear.
If I say no, is it gonna upsetthem?
No, speak your truth before youeven allow yourself to talk
yourself out of it.
Speak the truth that you've beenswallowing, simply put.
Because confidence does not comefirst, action does.
Is you know, just like going tothe gym, like the motivation
comes afterwards.
At first, you're not yourhealthiest, you're not used to
(24:15):
this new routine.
So you have to do it for alittle while.
You'll see some results, you'llstart to notice momentum picking
up.
Oh my gosh, I'm walking faster.
Oh my gosh, I went from afive-pound dumbbell to a
10-pound dumbbell.
Like you can see the progress,and so therefore, you're
motivated to keep going.
So, confidence and motivationdoes not come first, action
(24:39):
does.
And that's how you start torebuild your trust within
yourself is just by one tinypromise at a time.
You don't have to make all thesebig promises to yourself and
then get bummed out when thingsdon't happen quickly.
Let's recap all these steps realquick, okay?
Remember who you were before thenoise.
That's number one.
Number two, audit the voicesyou're listening to.
(25:01):
Number three, take one bravetiny action.
But here's like your realchallenge for the week, okay?
Like, Jacqueline, you alreadyhave us three things to do.
I promise, it's not gonna bethat bad.
I want you to do one thing thatreminds you of who you are,
okay?
This doesn't have to cost money.
For some of us, it might be.
(25:21):
You know, I haven't gotten mynails done in like a year and a
half.
Mama, if you got the money andyou got your bills paid and you
feel good about it, go treatyourself.
Okay.
What one, you know, thing thatreminds you of who you are could
be picking up the guitar.
Like I've got to do that everyonce in a while.
And when I do, I feel so good.
I feel so good playing guitar,singing my music, and just
strumming to my heart's contentor until my fingers fall off.
(25:44):
Okay.
Could be going for the walk.
We mentioned walks a few times,could be just cooking a meal
with your kids or with yourpartner, or really just, you
know, taking time to be presentwith your puppy, with your dog.
Could be getting back out in thegarden.
Like, I don't know what it lookslike for you, but there is
something that you can do thisweek that is going to remind you
(26:06):
of who you are.
And when you do that, I want youto take a picture of what you're
doing, bonus points if I get tosee your beautiful face, and I
want you to tag JacquelineCotton and just women talking
shit on Instagram so that I cancelebrate you.
I will repost it in my stories,and we will all celebrate you
(26:26):
because you deserve.
You deserve to feel celebratedjust as you are, authentically,
imperfect, unapologetically,okay, messy bun and all, mama.
You really might just inspiresomebody else to start
reclaiming themselves too.
That's what's so beautiful aboutthis podcast.
That's what's so beautiful aboutsisterhood in general and just
(26:48):
spreading light and positivityis that when you show up and
shine your light, you'reinspiring other people to do the
same thing.
Man.
125 episodes, though.
I like, I don't know.
I don't know what it is about125.
You know, when I when I reached50, I was like, oh my God.
And then I reached 100.
I'm like, holy shit.
And now I'm at 125.
(27:10):
And I feel like my next one isgonna be 150, and and then we'll
jump to 200.
And I don't know, it's justsomeone who that, someone who
that, what was that?
Someone like myself who has hadcommitment issues through being
taught inconsistent um behaviorsand patterns throughout my life.
(27:31):
It just it's been so good to,even though I'm not always
consistently posting, to knowthat consistency can just look
like showing up, you know, inthe good spurts, and then
knowing that it's not, it's nota plateau, you know, it's not
downhill, it's just we took alittle break and and now we're
(27:53):
picking back up.
It's kind of like on a rollercoaster, you know, when they go
up, up, up, up, up, up, up, andthen they level out for a
minute.
And then they go up, up, up, up,up, up, up.
Yeah, I just leveled out for aminute, right?
So it's I I just have to givemyself a little pat on the back
that um that this thing is stillfucking going.
To be honest, part of it notalways being super consistent is
(28:15):
that I have self-funded thispodcast since 2021.
I've never asked anybody forsupport.
I've looked into Patreon, I'velooked into some other things,
but I've never just put it outthere that maybe people want to
help.
Maybe people want to be part ofthis.
And so there have been monthswhere when I'm not, you know,
(28:36):
making money because my mentalhealth and my chronic illnesses
get the best of me sometimes.
There are just numerous thingsthat that play into to me not
having the fun.
So I am, I'm gonna put it outthere that people want to help,
that people want to give threeor five dollars.
And if you do, I will give youuh a really personal shout out
(28:57):
and let everybody know how howfreaking grateful I am for you.
But I'm gonna open the floor up.
I'm gonna open the floor up forwhat I preach all the time, is
and that's that that we can allcome together and make beautiful
things.
And so if you really enjoy thisshow and you want to support the
show, you can just donate.
There'll be a link below or youcan look up top.
But I also want to remind youthat if you don't want to
(29:19):
support the show or you don'thave you know three dollars to
to throw around right now, threedollars a month, that's okay
too.
There are other things you cando.
You can totally leave a reviewon Apple Podcasts, you can send
this episode to your friends,you can um rate this show and
give it all the stars onSpotify.
(29:41):
You can tag us in your storiesso that other people can see our
content so that they can listento the podcast.
You can write the show whetheryou want to do it through uh
Buzz Sprout where there's like afan mail option, or you want to
send an email directly to us atJWTS podcast at gmail.com, you
(30:04):
can send in your questions,whether it's for me, whether it
is for an upcoming expert, youhave like a love and
relationships question.
If you have a question aboutwomen's health, if you have a
question about hypnotherapy, ifyou have a question about diets,
nutrition, sex, like mentalhealth, anything to do with
personally evolving as a woman,send the questions in or send
(30:28):
your stories in.
Maybe you have a reallybeautiful story of how this
amazing thing happened in yourlife, or um, you could inspire
someone.
Um, or maybe you just need alittle pep in your step and you
need, you know, to share, sharewhat you're going through right
now and just receive love fromthe community.
Send us, send us some mail.
(30:50):
We would love.
And by we, I refer to we becauseI'm just manifesting this giant
team one day.
But right now it's just me.
Not even gonna trip on y'all.
It's just me.
But I say we because I'mspeaking it into existence.
So we would love to receive yourmail, your questions, if you
need advice, if you want to givea tip or actionable step um to
(31:11):
others, if you want to, youknow, recommend a subject that
we should cover, if you want tosend a guest our way.
These are all ways that you canhelp the show, okay?
Because the goal is to take thison the road.
Would have done it a bunch, Imean, a lot sooner.
A bunch.
Would have done it a bunchsooner.
But, you know, like I told you,uh, I went on hiatus and I was
(31:33):
just feeling real sorry formyself and being a little
fucking bitch.
But I'm back and I'm donefeeling sorry for myself because
I felt stupid.
Once I came to, I was like,bitch, you just wasted so much
time.
I'm glad you felt like you got agood break, but we're not going
to just like self-retreat likewe've always done when we know
(31:54):
that's not working, right?
So the podcast started as me,you know, just like trying to
get a sense of my own life, butit's really turning this whole
community of women who show up,share the hard stuff, and grow
anyway.
And if this episode spoke toyou, I just I ask that you know,
you share it with a friend,someone who might need that
reminder today.
And if you crave a deeperconnection and transformation, I
(32:15):
really incentivize you to checkout the weird women who wonder
experience, which is going to bedown in the show notes.
It's my annual self discoveryand sisterhood retreat where we
take these conversations offlineand do the real work together in
person.
So you can find all thosedetails in the show notes.
And until next time, my kids areabout to walk in, so we gotta we
gotta cut this short.
(32:35):
Keep talking your shit, keepgrowing, and keep remembering
who the fuck you are.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com