July 27, 2025 • 22 mins
The show is all about the legacy we leave. DO we want to be remembered in the lifestyle as someone that everyone is glad to see leaving or someone everyone wishes they would stay, A unique topic and for sure a very unique rant.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 00 (00:01):
Hey kids, the program you're about to listen
to contains some adultsituations, adult language,
themes, and other adult topics.
If you're easily offended, thisshow's not for you.
Casbo Rants.
Holy shit, fuck, are youshitting me?
(00:21):
No fucking way, you've lostyour fucking mind.
Sweet mother of Christ, what'swrong with you?
No, fuck, shit, son of a, damnit! Get over it.
Un-fucking-believable.
Casbah Rants.
Let's go.
Hey, you crazy motherfuckers.
Welcome back to another editionof Casbah's Rant.
I'm Cole.
(00:42):
I'm part of Casbah the Rants.
For those of you following athome, this is Season 6, Episode
185.
Before we get started, let'sgive a quick shout-out to our
sponsors.
Our newest sponsor, Discreetand Dirty Company, Lifestyle
Apparel, Flirty, Funny, Dirty...
Fast shipping, custom designswelcome.
Check them out today.
(01:03):
DiscreteDirtyCEO.com.
You'll be glad you did.
And don't forget the name youcan trust in adult toys,
MotorBunny.com.
That's right, you can get theMotorBunny original or the new
buck.
Definitely check it out.
A name you can trust with aproduct that will last for years
of enjoyment, MotorBunny.com.
(01:23):
ASNLifestyleMagazine.com.
That's right.
If you want to know what'sgoing on in the adult world as
well as the lifestyle, make it ahabit each and every month to
read ASNLifestyleMagazine.com.
August edition is coming out.
It's going to be a great one.
Make sure you check it out.
We're in there.
We've been on the cover.
It's a big deal.
So do.
And finally, safety in thelifestyle with STD and STI
(01:45):
testing.
It's our responsibility.
It's your responsibility.
It's all of our responsibility.
Basis DX or Pro 13.
That's what we use for all ofour porn shoots.
And you can use it too as well.
Ships to your home.
It's discreet.
It's quick.
It's cost effective.
No more excuses not to betested for safety in the
(02:07):
lifestyle.
And you can get, in our shownotes, you can get links to all
of our sponsors.
Please make sure you check themout.
We greatly appreciate it, andthey do as well.
Okay, so let's get started.
You know, this week has been a,as a 52, almost 53-year-old
guy, this week has been aninteresting week for In terms of
(02:29):
looking at your life, and forthose of you who don't know,
this week has seen icons inindustries die.
We obviously had Malcolm fromCosby Show died in the drowning
to start the week off.
(02:49):
Ozzy Osbourne died.
died 17 days after his lastshow with Black Sabbath, and
then Hulk Hogan died suddenlyjust a day ago, two days ago.
And I bring this up becauseobviously when you have folks
that are that well-known, thatare part of historic or
(03:10):
groundbreaking activities,events, whatever, the
conversation of legacy comes up.
I mean, obviously, we'retalking Black Sabbath, Ozzy
Osbourne, we're talkingHulkamania, we're talking The
Cosby Show, right?
These are folks that had amassive impression on people's
(03:33):
lives.
And so the concept of legacycomes up.
And obviously, there's a wholelot that goes with that and
legacy.
When you talk about that, weall know there's differences and
differences their real lifeversus their professional lives
and lots of debate.
But what it made me start tothink about is the reality is
(03:55):
everybody wants to think aboutlegacy.
And is there a legacy in thelifestyle?
And the reality of it is, yes.
It's huge.
It's huge.
It's absolutely huge.
(04:15):
Now, the unique part of legacyin the lifestyle is not so much,
a lot of people leave thelifestyle not by death, but by
choice.
Some people by death, somepeople all the way through.
But why would we even need totalk about legacy in the
lifestyle?
Well, one, let's talk a littlebit about, let's talk about what
(04:38):
type of legacies can be left.
There's good legacies, there'sbad legacies.
We all know that at your job,for example, you know there's
people that have worked at yourcompany for a long time and they
have left a legacy.
There's an opinion about them.
When people retire, rememberBob, boy, he was really good at
this.
Bob really made a difference.
(04:59):
Bob left a positive legacy.
Or there's people who are like,God, that guy was such a dick.
He was always an asshole.
He liked to steal, whatever.
There's negative.
Why would we worry about it atwork?
Work is a huge percentage ofour time.
Most of us spend countlesshours, like a third of our life,
(05:21):
at our jobs.
So, of course, legacy kicksinto effect there because it has
such an impact on it.
What's the legacy we leave as aparent?
What's the legacy we leave asmaybe an aunt or an uncle,
whatever the case may be, afamily, but that relationship
(05:42):
because it's a huge chunk of ourtime.
And the thing is, is there arecertain clubs, groups, whatever,
that people are involved withthat become that same sort of
situation.
Maybe it's scouting.
I mean, there are people thatwere involved with scouting for
50 years.
There are people that areinvolved with rotary clubs or
(06:02):
religious organizations orwhatever the case may be.
Anything that is something thataffects people's lives and you
put a lot of time is there's apotential for legacy, right?
And the lifestyle is exactlythe same way, although it may
not be as long of a term, justbased upon what the lifestyle
(06:23):
is.
The level of trust, confidence,deep meaning and security, and
the areas the lifestyle touchesmakes it an absolute
legacy-leaving lifestyle.
You can do more damage in twoyears or a year in the lifestyle
(06:51):
than you can do in yourneighborhood in 20 years.
I mean, quite literally, if youthink about it.
And you can also do more good.
And the truth is, everyone hasa desire in the back of their
mind to not be forgotten.
(07:11):
That's what legacy is.
The legacy is to not beforgotten, to be remembered,
that somehow or another, afteryou are no longer here or part
of it or whatever the case maybe, that you are remembered.
It plays into my world.
Obviously, mine's a little bitdifferent in terms of because of
(07:32):
the events and the other thingswe do, but legacy plays into
it.
I want people long after I'mgone, after Casbah's gone, to
people still remember thepositive influences of our
events, of us, of Casbah.
It's important to me.
And honestly, this message isabout the fact that legacy
(07:55):
should be, when it comes tolifestyle, important to all of
us because how we are rememberedshould be important and we
should model our behavioraccordingly.
It's a huge part of this, ofwho we are.
Again, because the lifestyle,the intensity level of the
(08:18):
ability to help or harm someoneis so much stronger in the
lifestyle because of itsfeelings, its emotions, its
sexuality.
The rewards or the damage canbe so much more intense and so
much quicker.
We need to think in terms ofhow we're remembered.
Do we want to be remembered asa homewrecker?
(08:40):
Do we want to be rememberedas...
a creep or a dirtbag, a pieceof shit as selfish?
Do we want to be remembered aspeople that are great to hang
out with, people that truly werewelcoming and accepting and
(09:00):
growing?
Do we want to be remembered assomebody that we hope, do we
want to be remembered as someonethat people hope to forget?
That's a very real part of itin the lifestyle.
You know people, you knowpeople that you have met if
you've been in a live show alength of time, or if you are in
(09:21):
it any length of time, you willmeet people that you will hope
to forget.
Maybe it's via a horriblehookup, maybe it's via a bad
interaction, whatever the casemay be, but we have to think
about that.
Is that what we want?
Is that what we want our legacyto be?
Because how we behave in everysituation Absolutely dictates
(09:48):
that.
The really unique part is somany similarities here when you
look at people like Ozzy and youlook at people like Hulk Hogan,
for example, those two, whereyears of positives were stained
(10:09):
by singular events.
Some were overcome, someweren't.
And that made me really, again,think more about the lifestyle.
The fact that, I'll give anexample of the Ozzy Osbourne.
Obviously, for those of you whodon't know or any history about
Ozzy, in the 80s, Ozzy was ontour in San Antonio, drunk,
(10:35):
fucked up, whatever, pissed onthe Alamo at night when it was
closed.
I mean, there were arrestwarrants.
It was bad.
I mean, you talk about anegative blemish, right?
Now, as years went through, itwas like sometime in the 90s,
maybe a little later than that,you know, as Ozzy looked back,
(10:56):
he reached out to the Alamo,made public apologies to the
Alamo, reached out to learn moreabout it, whatever, enough so
that on his passing, the Alamoput out a remembrance of Ozzy, a
positive thing.
But I use that as an examplehow One thing instantly altered
(11:19):
the perception, right, ofsomeone and how much it took
years and work to overcome thatone incident.
And obviously, there's lots ofthose with Hulk Hogan.
We're not going to go intothose.
But again, how one or twoinstances can the amount of
damage or the amount of changeto a legacy that can happen how
(11:46):
does this apply to the lifestyleokay great let's put it this
way you've always been someonegreat great great you by the
rules and all of a sudden onetime you fuck up non-consent
touch somebody without consenteverything you've done up to
that point instantly loses a lotof its luster because now it's
based upon the most currentreality that's the truth And
(12:11):
again, the lifestyle, because ofthe intensity of the feelings
and the emotions, it absolutelymagnifies.
Look, you have the ability withone poor decision to cause
someone else to completely leavethe lifestyle, to have a
situation blasted to literallyhundreds, if not more, thousands
(12:32):
of people about what you did.
And that's just being in thelifestyle.
That's not being necessarily apublic figure in the lifestyle
or anything else.
So the power of your actionsand the legacy you leave are
(12:53):
amazing.
And I can tell you, doingsomething like touching someone
without consent...
It's way more powerful and hasway more consequences than
pissing on the Alamo.
Just saying.
But that's the mindset that wehave to understand.
(13:15):
It's okay to make mistakes.
We're not saying you have to beperfect.
Mistakes are one thing, butchoices are such another.
It's okay to accidentally notnotice somebody and not include
them.
It's not okay to purposelyblock them out.
You see the difference there?
That's the difference betweenthe type of legacies that you
(13:39):
leave and create.
Now understand, with anything,with any person, famous or not
famous, there is always going tobe a degree of humanity in that
equation.
What do I mean by that?
The degree of humanity is thatthere are just some people that,
you know what, we just oil andwater, don't mix.
(14:00):
Don't mix.
It doesn't matter how nice youthink you are or how nice they
think they are.
You know what?
Personalities just don't mix.
They collide.
They don't get along.
It's just kind of a degree offucking fuck you, fuck you type
thing, you know?
It's one of those things.
There's also always going to bea degree of humanity with
(14:23):
perception.
That's the truth of thesituation.
There's always going to beperception, right?
And most of the perception,whether you're famous or not
famous, it comes from whatpeople hear and how it was told
to them.
The reality is most situationsthat define people, that define
us and our legacies, are notones that are witnessed by
(14:45):
everyone.
They're witnessed by somepeople, and it's how those
people share that information.
And obviously, anytime peopleshare information, go play the
whisper game.
Mom said be home by 10 and youhave 10 people and everybody
whispers at each other's ear.
By the end of the whisper, itgets to, you know, the kangaroo
fucks rabbits.
What?
I mean, it's just that fuckingbizarre.
(15:07):
So there's always going to bethat factor in it.
So a positive legacy is notabout every single person loving
you and finding nothing wrongwith you.
It doesn't work that way.
But it's about the vastmajority.
It's a pattern of how you dothings.
(15:29):
Positive legacy is left by thefact that the majority of people
go...
They hear something negativeand go, that just doesn't sound
like them.
That's the truth of it.
And I'm sure a lot of yourlisteners are going, I don't
(15:49):
understand.
What does this actually have todo with swinging?
Why does it matter?
It matters...
Because if the lifestyle, a bigpart of the lifestyle is about
reacting and living in themoment.
When you're talking to somebodywho likes to sport fuck, that
absolutely.
It's about living in themoment.
But even when we live in themoment, we have to think further
(16:15):
out than that.
That's just in life.
You're driving a car.
You're driving down the road.
You have to be focused on theride here right now, but you
still have to be conscious ofthe stoplight up ahead, right?
You still have to, you'redriving down the road and you
see up ahead there's kidsplaying.
You still have to, you're inthe moment because you can't not
(16:38):
know what's going on.
You're still conscious of it.
You wreck your car, but youhave to be ready so in case they
make some move, right?
It's the same type of thing inthe lifestyle.
You have to live in the momentbecause if you just live for,
Down the road, you're missingthe point of the lifestyle, but
you still have to have that inthe back of your mind.
You have to understand theconsequences, and you have to
(16:59):
plan accordingly and actaccordingly.
Excuse me.
You have to understand that youare leaving a trail.
You are leaving a history.
And sometimes legacy is thewrong word because sometimes
(17:20):
people look at legacy and theygo, well, that's conceited.
You know what?
Here's the deal.
If you feel that anybody whowants to leave a legacy is
conceited, great.
You know what?
The amount of people in thisworld that can say with complete
honesty that they are totally100% okay and mean it to live,
live life, and then be forgottenthe day after they die and
(17:44):
they're completely okay with it,I'm sure there's a few, but
they're very rare.
It's not human nature.
It's just not.
And the lifestyle is the sameway.
Even if you're only in it for Xamount of time, when you leave,
let me ask you this, when youleave the lifestyle, whether
(18:05):
that be after six months, sixyears, 60 years, do you want
people to be glad to see youleave?
There's the question.
Or do you want people to wishyou were still there or wish you
stayed?
Because that's ultimately whatlegacy is.
And that's the reality of thesituation.
(18:30):
How you behave at an event.
How you behave in being groups.
How you interact with people.
How you include or don'tinclude.
How you follow the rules ofconsent and confidentiality.
How you hold and carryyourself.
Do you want people to be gladwhen you leave, or do you want
(18:55):
people to wish you were still apart of it?
It's really funny.
A lot of times people will takebreaks from the lifestyle for
whatever reason.
Take a break from thelifestyle, and when they make
the decision to come back intothe lifestyle, and I see this
again being on all the pagesthat I'm on.
(19:16):
I mean, I'm only on like, Idon't know, Fucking 40 Facebook
pages, God knows Twitter, youknow, the whole nine yards.
It's so interesting when yousee after people have taken
hiatus, whether it be for ashort-term couple of months or
there's people that have taken acouple of years, raised kids,
off, whatever.
It is so interesting when yousee them talk about hiatus Their
(19:40):
experiences as they come backinto the lifestyle.
It speaks volumes.
I don't have to know thepeople.
I don't have to know anythingabout them to know based upon
how they talk about theirexperiences coming back into the
lifestyle what type of peoplethey were.
It was so great.
We've been, you know, we gotout of lifestyle for like 10
(20:01):
years and we really, you know,we finally, it's like we miss
this.
We wanted to come back.
It was so awesome.
There were so many new people,a lot of people that didn't know
us, but people that did, thatwere excited or what we'd known
briefly that we had, it was likewe picked up right where we
left off.
Well, what's that tell youabout them?
It tells you they'd left apositive legacy at that point in
(20:21):
time.
And then there's people thatSay, well, we took six months a
year to come off.
We come back and people that wethought were our friends didn't
even act like they knew us.
We felt so alone.
No one would talk to us.
Well, what does that tell you?
Yes, there could be the factthat some of the people are just
assholes.
Okay.
(20:42):
But if no one was excited tosee you back, well, what is the
problem like quite possibly?
It speaks volumes.
So the question of my ranttoday, or my question of, not
question, or my how to dosomething, whatever, I don't
know what the fuck it is, endnote, is again the question I
(21:08):
posed before.
Do you want people to be gladyou're leaving or left, or do
you want people to wish you werestaying?
What's your legacy going to be?
(21:29):
Don't confuse the fact that noone else sets it, by the way.
FYI, I got to throw this in, orelse it just popped in my
brain.
No one else sets it.
Before you sit there and go,well, my legacy was great, but
this person talks shit.
No, you know what?
That's not it.
That's not it.
(21:52):
If you have a reputation as ahomewrecker, it's because you
wrecked homes.
If you have a reputation as anasshole, it's because you're an
asshole.
You can't blame that onsomebody else.
How do you want people toremember you?
Are they glad you left or wishyou were staying?
You control your legacy.
(22:16):
Make it what you want it to be.
You've heard me say it before,you'll hear me say it again.
This rant's over.
Hey kids, the program you're about to listen
to contains some adultsituations, adult language,
themes, and other adult topics.
If you're easily offended, thisshow's not for you.
Casbo Rants.
Holy shit, fuck, are youshitting me?
(00:21):
No fucking way, you've lostyour fucking mind.
Sweet mother of Christ, what'swrong with you?
No, fuck, shit, son of a, damnit! Get over it.
Un-fucking-believable.
Casbah Rants.
Let's go.
Hey, you crazy motherfuckers.
Welcome back to another editionof Casbah's Rant.
I'm Cole.
(00:42):
I'm part of Casbah the Rants.
For those of you following athome, this is Season 6, Episode
185.
Before we get started, let'sgive a quick shout-out to our
sponsors.
Our newest sponsor, Discreetand Dirty Company, Lifestyle
Apparel, Flirty, Funny, Dirty...
Fast shipping, custom designswelcome.
Check them out today.
(01:03):
DiscreteDirtyCEO.com.
You'll be glad you did.
And don't forget the name youcan trust in adult toys,
MotorBunny.com.
That's right, you can get theMotorBunny original or the new
buck.
Definitely check it out.
A name you can trust with aproduct that will last for years
of enjoyment, MotorBunny.com.
(01:23):
ASNLifestyleMagazine.com.
That's right.
If you want to know what'sgoing on in the adult world as
well as the lifestyle, make it ahabit each and every month to
read ASNLifestyleMagazine.com.
August edition is coming out.
It's going to be a great one.
Make sure you check it out.
We're in there.
We've been on the cover.
It's a big deal.
So do.
And finally, safety in thelifestyle with STD and STI
(01:45):
testing.
It's our responsibility.
It's your responsibility.
It's all of our responsibility.
Basis DX or Pro 13.
That's what we use for all ofour porn shoots.
And you can use it too as well.
Ships to your home.
It's discreet.
It's quick.
It's cost effective.
No more excuses not to betested for safety in the
(02:07):
lifestyle.
And you can get, in our shownotes, you can get links to all
of our sponsors.
Please make sure you check themout.
We greatly appreciate it, andthey do as well.
Okay, so let's get started.
You know, this week has been a,as a 52, almost 53-year-old
guy, this week has been aninteresting week for In terms of
(02:29):
looking at your life, and forthose of you who don't know,
this week has seen icons inindustries die.
We obviously had Malcolm fromCosby Show died in the drowning
to start the week off.
(02:49):
Ozzy Osbourne died.
died 17 days after his lastshow with Black Sabbath, and
then Hulk Hogan died suddenlyjust a day ago, two days ago.
And I bring this up becauseobviously when you have folks
that are that well-known, thatare part of historic or
(03:10):
groundbreaking activities,events, whatever, the
conversation of legacy comes up.
I mean, obviously, we'retalking Black Sabbath, Ozzy
Osbourne, we're talkingHulkamania, we're talking The
Cosby Show, right?
These are folks that had amassive impression on people's
(03:33):
lives.
And so the concept of legacycomes up.
And obviously, there's a wholelot that goes with that and
legacy.
When you talk about that, weall know there's differences and
differences their real lifeversus their professional lives
and lots of debate.
But what it made me start tothink about is the reality is
(03:55):
everybody wants to think aboutlegacy.
And is there a legacy in thelifestyle?
And the reality of it is, yes.
It's huge.
It's huge.
It's absolutely huge.
(04:15):
Now, the unique part of legacyin the lifestyle is not so much,
a lot of people leave thelifestyle not by death, but by
choice.
Some people by death, somepeople all the way through.
But why would we even need totalk about legacy in the
lifestyle?
Well, one, let's talk a littlebit about, let's talk about what
(04:38):
type of legacies can be left.
There's good legacies, there'sbad legacies.
We all know that at your job,for example, you know there's
people that have worked at yourcompany for a long time and they
have left a legacy.
There's an opinion about them.
When people retire, rememberBob, boy, he was really good at
this.
Bob really made a difference.
(04:59):
Bob left a positive legacy.
Or there's people who are like,God, that guy was such a dick.
He was always an asshole.
He liked to steal, whatever.
There's negative.
Why would we worry about it atwork?
Work is a huge percentage ofour time.
Most of us spend countlesshours, like a third of our life,
(05:21):
at our jobs.
So, of course, legacy kicksinto effect there because it has
such an impact on it.
What's the legacy we leave as aparent?
What's the legacy we leave asmaybe an aunt or an uncle,
whatever the case may be, afamily, but that relationship
(05:42):
because it's a huge chunk of ourtime.
And the thing is, is there arecertain clubs, groups, whatever,
that people are involved withthat become that same sort of
situation.
Maybe it's scouting.
I mean, there are people thatwere involved with scouting for
50 years.
There are people that areinvolved with rotary clubs or
(06:02):
religious organizations orwhatever the case may be.
Anything that is something thataffects people's lives and you
put a lot of time is there's apotential for legacy, right?
And the lifestyle is exactlythe same way, although it may
not be as long of a term, justbased upon what the lifestyle
(06:23):
is.
The level of trust, confidence,deep meaning and security, and
the areas the lifestyle touchesmakes it an absolute
legacy-leaving lifestyle.
You can do more damage in twoyears or a year in the lifestyle
(06:51):
than you can do in yourneighborhood in 20 years.
I mean, quite literally, if youthink about it.
And you can also do more good.
And the truth is, everyone hasa desire in the back of their
mind to not be forgotten.
(07:11):
That's what legacy is.
The legacy is to not beforgotten, to be remembered,
that somehow or another, afteryou are no longer here or part
of it or whatever the case maybe, that you are remembered.
It plays into my world.
Obviously, mine's a little bitdifferent in terms of because of
(07:32):
the events and the other thingswe do, but legacy plays into
it.
I want people long after I'mgone, after Casbah's gone, to
people still remember thepositive influences of our
events, of us, of Casbah.
It's important to me.
And honestly, this message isabout the fact that legacy
(07:55):
should be, when it comes tolifestyle, important to all of
us because how we are rememberedshould be important and we
should model our behavioraccordingly.
It's a huge part of this, ofwho we are.
Again, because the lifestyle,the intensity level of the
(08:18):
ability to help or harm someoneis so much stronger in the
lifestyle because of itsfeelings, its emotions, its
sexuality.
The rewards or the damage canbe so much more intense and so
much quicker.
We need to think in terms ofhow we're remembered.
Do we want to be remembered asa homewrecker?
(08:40):
Do we want to be rememberedas...
a creep or a dirtbag, a pieceof shit as selfish?
Do we want to be remembered aspeople that are great to hang
out with, people that truly werewelcoming and accepting and
(09:00):
growing?
Do we want to be remembered assomebody that we hope, do we
want to be remembered as someonethat people hope to forget?
That's a very real part of itin the lifestyle.
You know people, you knowpeople that you have met if
you've been in a live show alength of time, or if you are in
(09:21):
it any length of time, you willmeet people that you will hope
to forget.
Maybe it's via a horriblehookup, maybe it's via a bad
interaction, whatever the casemay be, but we have to think
about that.
Is that what we want?
Is that what we want our legacyto be?
Because how we behave in everysituation Absolutely dictates
(09:48):
that.
The really unique part is somany similarities here when you
look at people like Ozzy and youlook at people like Hulk Hogan,
for example, those two, whereyears of positives were stained
(10:09):
by singular events.
Some were overcome, someweren't.
And that made me really, again,think more about the lifestyle.
The fact that, I'll give anexample of the Ozzy Osbourne.
Obviously, for those of you whodon't know or any history about
Ozzy, in the 80s, Ozzy was ontour in San Antonio, drunk,
(10:35):
fucked up, whatever, pissed onthe Alamo at night when it was
closed.
I mean, there were arrestwarrants.
It was bad.
I mean, you talk about anegative blemish, right?
Now, as years went through, itwas like sometime in the 90s,
maybe a little later than that,you know, as Ozzy looked back,
(10:56):
he reached out to the Alamo,made public apologies to the
Alamo, reached out to learn moreabout it, whatever, enough so
that on his passing, the Alamoput out a remembrance of Ozzy, a
positive thing.
But I use that as an examplehow One thing instantly altered
(11:19):
the perception, right, ofsomeone and how much it took
years and work to overcome thatone incident.
And obviously, there's lots ofthose with Hulk Hogan.
We're not going to go intothose.
But again, how one or twoinstances can the amount of
damage or the amount of changeto a legacy that can happen how
(11:46):
does this apply to the lifestyleokay great let's put it this
way you've always been someonegreat great great you by the
rules and all of a sudden onetime you fuck up non-consent
touch somebody without consenteverything you've done up to
that point instantly loses a lotof its luster because now it's
based upon the most currentreality that's the truth And
(12:11):
again, the lifestyle, because ofthe intensity of the feelings
and the emotions, it absolutelymagnifies.
Look, you have the ability withone poor decision to cause
someone else to completely leavethe lifestyle, to have a
situation blasted to literallyhundreds, if not more, thousands
(12:32):
of people about what you did.
And that's just being in thelifestyle.
That's not being necessarily apublic figure in the lifestyle
or anything else.
So the power of your actionsand the legacy you leave are
(12:53):
amazing.
And I can tell you, doingsomething like touching someone
without consent...
It's way more powerful and hasway more consequences than
pissing on the Alamo.
Just saying.
But that's the mindset that wehave to understand.
(13:15):
It's okay to make mistakes.
We're not saying you have to beperfect.
Mistakes are one thing, butchoices are such another.
It's okay to accidentally notnotice somebody and not include
them.
It's not okay to purposelyblock them out.
You see the difference there?
That's the difference betweenthe type of legacies that you
(13:39):
leave and create.
Now understand, with anything,with any person, famous or not
famous, there is always going tobe a degree of humanity in that
equation.
What do I mean by that?
The degree of humanity is thatthere are just some people that,
you know what, we just oil andwater, don't mix.
(14:00):
Don't mix.
It doesn't matter how nice youthink you are or how nice they
think they are.
You know what?
Personalities just don't mix.
They collide.
They don't get along.
It's just kind of a degree offucking fuck you, fuck you type
thing, you know?
It's one of those things.
There's also always going to bea degree of humanity with
(14:23):
perception.
That's the truth of thesituation.
There's always going to beperception, right?
And most of the perception,whether you're famous or not
famous, it comes from whatpeople hear and how it was told
to them.
The reality is most situationsthat define people, that define
us and our legacies, are notones that are witnessed by
(14:45):
everyone.
They're witnessed by somepeople, and it's how those
people share that information.
And obviously, anytime peopleshare information, go play the
whisper game.
Mom said be home by 10 and youhave 10 people and everybody
whispers at each other's ear.
By the end of the whisper, itgets to, you know, the kangaroo
fucks rabbits.
What?
I mean, it's just that fuckingbizarre.
(15:07):
So there's always going to bethat factor in it.
So a positive legacy is notabout every single person loving
you and finding nothing wrongwith you.
It doesn't work that way.
But it's about the vastmajority.
It's a pattern of how you dothings.
(15:29):
Positive legacy is left by thefact that the majority of people
go...
They hear something negativeand go, that just doesn't sound
like them.
That's the truth of it.
And I'm sure a lot of yourlisteners are going, I don't
(15:49):
understand.
What does this actually have todo with swinging?
Why does it matter?
It matters...
Because if the lifestyle, a bigpart of the lifestyle is about
reacting and living in themoment.
When you're talking to somebodywho likes to sport fuck, that
absolutely.
It's about living in themoment.
But even when we live in themoment, we have to think further
(16:15):
out than that.
That's just in life.
You're driving a car.
You're driving down the road.
You have to be focused on theride here right now, but you
still have to be conscious ofthe stoplight up ahead, right?
You still have to, you'redriving down the road and you
see up ahead there's kidsplaying.
You still have to, you're inthe moment because you can't not
(16:38):
know what's going on.
You're still conscious of it.
You wreck your car, but youhave to be ready so in case they
make some move, right?
It's the same type of thing inthe lifestyle.
You have to live in the momentbecause if you just live for,
Down the road, you're missingthe point of the lifestyle, but
you still have to have that inthe back of your mind.
You have to understand theconsequences, and you have to
(16:59):
plan accordingly and actaccordingly.
Excuse me.
You have to understand that youare leaving a trail.
You are leaving a history.
And sometimes legacy is thewrong word because sometimes
(17:20):
people look at legacy and theygo, well, that's conceited.
You know what?
Here's the deal.
If you feel that anybody whowants to leave a legacy is
conceited, great.
You know what?
The amount of people in thisworld that can say with complete
honesty that they are totally100% okay and mean it to live,
live life, and then be forgottenthe day after they die and
(17:44):
they're completely okay with it,I'm sure there's a few, but
they're very rare.
It's not human nature.
It's just not.
And the lifestyle is the sameway.
Even if you're only in it for Xamount of time, when you leave,
let me ask you this, when youleave the lifestyle, whether
(18:05):
that be after six months, sixyears, 60 years, do you want
people to be glad to see youleave?
There's the question.
Or do you want people to wishyou were still there or wish you
stayed?
Because that's ultimately whatlegacy is.
And that's the reality of thesituation.
(18:30):
How you behave at an event.
How you behave in being groups.
How you interact with people.
How you include or don'tinclude.
How you follow the rules ofconsent and confidentiality.
How you hold and carryyourself.
Do you want people to be gladwhen you leave, or do you want
(18:55):
people to wish you were still apart of it?
It's really funny.
A lot of times people will takebreaks from the lifestyle for
whatever reason.
Take a break from thelifestyle, and when they make
the decision to come back intothe lifestyle, and I see this
again being on all the pagesthat I'm on.
(19:16):
I mean, I'm only on like, Idon't know, Fucking 40 Facebook
pages, God knows Twitter, youknow, the whole nine yards.
It's so interesting when yousee after people have taken
hiatus, whether it be for ashort-term couple of months or
there's people that have taken acouple of years, raised kids,
off, whatever.
It is so interesting when yousee them talk about hiatus Their
(19:40):
experiences as they come backinto the lifestyle.
It speaks volumes.
I don't have to know thepeople.
I don't have to know anythingabout them to know based upon
how they talk about theirexperiences coming back into the
lifestyle what type of peoplethey were.
It was so great.
We've been, you know, we gotout of lifestyle for like 10
(20:01):
years and we really, you know,we finally, it's like we miss
this.
We wanted to come back.
It was so awesome.
There were so many new people,a lot of people that didn't know
us, but people that did, thatwere excited or what we'd known
briefly that we had, it was likewe picked up right where we
left off.
Well, what's that tell youabout them?
It tells you they'd left apositive legacy at that point in
(20:21):
time.
And then there's people thatSay, well, we took six months a
year to come off.
We come back and people that wethought were our friends didn't
even act like they knew us.
We felt so alone.
No one would talk to us.
Well, what does that tell you?
Yes, there could be the factthat some of the people are just
assholes.
Okay.
(20:42):
But if no one was excited tosee you back, well, what is the
problem like quite possibly?
It speaks volumes.
So the question of my ranttoday, or my question of, not
question, or my how to dosomething, whatever, I don't
know what the fuck it is, endnote, is again the question I
(21:08):
posed before.
Do you want people to be gladyou're leaving or left, or do
you want people to wish you werestaying?
What's your legacy going to be?
(21:29):
Don't confuse the fact that noone else sets it, by the way.
FYI, I got to throw this in, orelse it just popped in my
brain.
No one else sets it.
Before you sit there and go,well, my legacy was great, but
this person talks shit.
No, you know what?
That's not it.
That's not it.
(21:52):
If you have a reputation as ahomewrecker, it's because you
wrecked homes.
If you have a reputation as anasshole, it's because you're an
asshole.
You can't blame that onsomebody else.
How do you want people toremember you?
Are they glad you left or wishyou were staying?
You control your legacy.
(22:16):
Make it what you want it to be.
You've heard me say it before,you'll hear me say it again.
This rant's over.
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