August 17, 2024 • 30 mins
Host Carmelita Tiu interviews sisters Amy and Nancy, founders of The Passionistas Project, about their journey, sisterhood, and empowering women.
Key Topics:
- [00:01:30] Introduction to Amy and Nancy
- Founders of The Passionistas Project and their sisterhood journey.
- [00:05:15] The Legacy of Their Mother
- Discussing the impact of their mother’s teachings and her creative influence.
- [00:12:45] Handling Conflicts Among Siblings
- Insights on their minimal arguments and strong family bond.
- [00:20:00] The Origin of The Passionistas Project
- How their careers in Hollywood led to creating a supportive community for women.
- [00:25:30] Building an Inclusive Sisterhood
- Details on their network and its focus on business, personal growth, and social impact.
- [00:35:00] Encouraging Vulnerability and Support
- Stories of women in the community lifting each other up during tough times.
Tune in for an inspiring conversation on the power of sisterhood and following your passions!
Guest Spotlight: Amy & Nancy Harrington
Sisters, Amy and Nancy Harrington, founded The Passionistas Project out of a deep desire to empower women around the world. Both co-founders walked away from high-profile jobs in Hollywood to work together. Amy was the Vice President of Post Production and Visual Effects for all feature films at Warner Bros, working on movies like the "Harry Potter," "Matrix" and "Batman" franchises. Nancy left the ad agency where she created Academy Award campaigns for Miramax. Now Amy and Nancy shine a light on the positive stories of self-identified women and non-binary people through their media company.
They have conducted over 1600 interviews including red carpet events and more than 65 one-on-one oral histories for The Interviews for the Television Academy Foundation with pop culture icons like Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Rita Moreno, Lily Tomlin, Laverne Cox, Carol Burnett and many others. They have also produced interviews for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame including a sit-down with Mick Jagger.
They were handpicked by OWN to be part of the VIP digital press corps covering "Oprah's Lifeclass" during Winfrey's tour of the U.S. and Toronto. Amy and Nancy founded The Passionistas Project in 2018 and through their podcast, online sisterhood and Power of Passionistas summit, they strive to inspire women to follow their passions and join forces in the fight for equality for all.
Connect with The Passionistas:
- Website: https://www.thepassionistasproject.com/about
- Instagram: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thepassionistasproject
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thepassionstasproject/
- Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/ThePassionistasProject/
- Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/thepassionistasproject
- YouTube: https://bit.ly/PassionistasYouTube
About Your Host, Carmelita Tiu
Mom, spouse, coach, podcaster, wordsmith, legal eagle. Endlessly curious about how we can show up better for ourselves – because when we do that, we also show up better for our kids and those around us. Visit carmelitatiu.com to learn more about Cat, and for info on 1:1 coaching, the mom collective, and her monthly newsletter.
Know Them, Be Them, Raise Them
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Carmelita Tiu (00:03):
Welcome to know them.
Be them, raise them a show tohelp busy, mindful growth oriented
moms stay informed and inspired,especially as they're navigating
their daughters tween and teen years.
I'm Carmelita too, anunapologetic multihyphenate.
I'm a mom of two girls, a wife, acertified life coach focusing on
(00:23):
holistic personal development formulti-passionate impact driven women.
Also an attorney forcreatives and a podcast host.
So my guests today are sisters,Amy and Nancy Harrington.
They founded the PassionistasProject out of a deep desire to
empower women around the world.
Both walked away from high profilejobs in Hollywood to work together.
(00:48):
Amy was the vice president of postproduction and visual effects for
feature films at Warner Brothers.
So she worked on movies likethe Harry Potter series, The
Matrix, and Batman franchises.
And then Nancy left the ad agencyworld where she created Academy
Award winning campaigns for Miramax.
Now Amy and Nancy shine a lighton the positive stories of self
(01:09):
identified women and non binarypeople through their media company.
They have conducted over 1600 interviews,including red carpet events and more
than 65 one on one oral histories forthe Television Academy Foundation with
pop culture icons like Julia LouisDreyfus, Rita Moreno, Lily Tomlin, Laverne
(01:30):
Cox, Carol Burnett, and many others.
They've also produced interviewsfor the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame,
including a sit down with Mick Jagger.
Who I happen to share a birthdaywith, not the year, but the day.
They were also handpicked by OWNthe Oprah Winfrey network to be
part of the VIP digital press corecovering Oprah's life class during
(01:52):
Oprah's tour of the U S in Toronto.
So clearly these womenare media rock stars.
They decided to found the PassionistasProject in 2018 and through their
podcast, Online Sisterhood andPower of Passionistas Summit.
They strive to inspire women tofollow their passions and join forces
in the fight for equality for all.
(02:14):
All right.
So that is who my guests today are.
One of the things that reallystruck me about the two of them
is how well they get along.
Clearly, they grew up together andrun the Passionistas project together.
But as you'll hear, they're, they'rereally close and you can tell that
they have such love for each other.
And not only that, they credittheir mom with being such a source
(02:39):
of inspiration and love and theyspeak about her with such reverence.
Part of the reason that I enjoyedour conversation so much is it was a
good reminder to me of the potentiallasting impacts of how we show up for
our kids and how that can also impacthow they show up for each other.
(03:00):
I think I'm guilty sometimes of gettingso caught up in the tasks at hand that I
don't really stop to think about, well,in 20, 30, 40 years, what's the vision?
What's one of these hopes thatI have for the two of them?
And what are the hopes that I havefor our relationship when I'm in
my, uh, Eighties, seventies, andthey're, you know, fully grown adults,
(03:24):
potentially with families of their own.
Amy and Nancy are a reminder of what'spossible in the best of ways, between
mothers, daughters, and siblings.
So without further ado,here's our conversation.
amy and Nancy, welcome.
(03:46):
I'm so thrilled to have you here asguests on Know Them, Be Them, Raise Them.
Before I dive any further, I'd loveto turn the, the mic, if you will, over
to both of you to tell the listenersa little bit about yourselves, and
then we'll kind of go from there.
Nancy Harrington (04:02):
So, uh, Amy and I are sisters.
We finish each other's sentencesand share a brain as we like to say.
and we have such a strong bond assisters that we want to offer that
connection to the women in our community.
We've started the Passionistas Projectabout, six or seven years ago, and
we've built an inclusive sisterhoodwhere women can come together.
(04:22):
And get support and feel empoweredto transform their lives.
So we focus on the three pillarsof business development, personal
growth and social impact.
And we have classes and resources andnetworking opportunities and fun parties.
And we have a podcastnetwork and Passionista's TV.
So we have all sorts of things, butit's all about sharing our sisterhood
(04:45):
with everybody because it's suchan unbreakable and beautiful bond.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (04:52):
So, for a little backstory, Amy, Nancy, and I are all part
of a group of women, a mastermind, if youwill, really for honing in on upleveling
the things that we're passionate about.
And as soon as I met Amy and Nancy, Ireally admired the drive and passion
and purpose that they had and we got totalking about what each of us were doing.
(05:13):
They found out that I had a podcastaimed at moms of girls and they shared
in such a beautiful way about theirmother's impact on them and it just
reminded me of, uh, moms and daughtersand the importance of that relationship.
And so I thought it made a lot of senseto bring you both here to take a step back
and speak with adult women to remind usof the various ways we may not even know
(05:39):
that as moms we're impacting our kids.
So, my next question for you is,what was your mother's legacy for you?
Amy Harrington (05:49):
Well, we had the best mom in the world, her name was
Betty, Betty Sacco, she became BettyHarrington, and had five kids, there
are five of us all together, we are thetwo youngest of five, we have an older
sister who's a filmmaker named Beth,our sister Lisa is a crochet artist.
Our brother is, uh, was a musician andnow is a bankruptcy attorney who has had
(06:13):
a case in front of the Supreme Court.
And then Nancy and I areout there doing our thing.
So, the most important thing ourmother ever taught us was your
brother and your sisters areyour best friends in the world.
And no matter what happens, You haveeach other and we've been through a
lot together and inevitably we're allthere for each other every single time.
(06:38):
So that is her true legacy.
And, and besides that, shewas just a very kind person.
Both our mother and father were, creative.
They met in art school.
Our dad had an advertising agency andour mother studied to be an art teacher.
So we grew up in a household where.
We were surrounded by music andtelevision and movies and art and could
(07:02):
use our dad's expensive art suppliesto doodle and never were told anything.
else but follow your passions, youknow, trust in yourself to do the
creative things you want to do.
There was never any hesitation like,Oh, you're Nancy's going to open
(07:23):
her own graphic design business.
Oh yeah, of course youopen your own business.
That's what you do.
Or I'm going to move to Californiafrom Braintree, Massachusetts, and I'm
going to get into the film industry.
And as much as they didn't wantme to go, it was never like,
you're never going to get a job.
It was like, okay.
You know, we'll missyou but you can do it.
So we just were really, really lucky thatour passions were supported and encouraged
(07:48):
from the minute we were born, and we wereborn into a group of five best friends who
have been by our side, our entire lives.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (07:57):
Out of curiosity, when you mentioned this
messaging about Being told that youare your each other's best friend.
How did that feel in momentswhere maybe you were arguing?
Because I would love to say that to mydaughters, but I could also imagine,
it not resonating at certain pointswhen they're arguing or bickering.
Nancy Harrington (08:18):
I think what makes us unusual, even more so is
that We didn't argue that much.
You know, I think my brother and Iprobably butted heads most because
we were really close in age, and,you know, I was his first little
sister so he could be bratty with me.
But, Amy and I hardlyever argue even as adults.
, the only time we really get into fightsis when we're traveling and we're hangry.
(08:42):
But, you know, when she said it, itwas usually when, maybe we were, you
know, You know, cranky and fightingover crayons or something, but it always
resonated it whenever our mother spoketo us, she had this way about her that
made us stop and think, Oh, she's right.
(09:02):
Even if we didn't want to hear it.
We're like,
You know, she just had thatway about her and we used to
say she gave us the evil eye.
Like if we were doing somethingshe didn't approve of, she didn't
really have to say anything to us.
She just gave us a look and we werelike, Oh, okay, mom, I'll stop.
. Carmelita (Cat) Tiu: That totally resonates. (09:22):
undefined
My mom was the same way.
She had this glance.
And when we saw the glance, weknew to stop what we're doing.
Something was off.
This does not jive with mom.
So, I totally get that.
Amy Harrington (09:37):
I also think she was good at helping us find, like if we were
bickering or if we were Mad at each otherfor some stupid reason like she helped
us find the thing that brought us backtogether you know whether that was like
baking chocolate chip cookies or Watchinga TV show together or going to the mall
(09:57):
and walking around like she found someway to shift the energy and Have us
find a way to have fun together again.
Nancy Harrington (10:07):
How did she get us to do, remember the time we put
the line of tape down the middleof the room, Brady Bunch style?
Although our door was on one side, so wehad to make like a corridor to get to it.
How did she get us, how didshe get us to get past that?
Do you remember?
Amy Harrington (10:25):
I don't, I, I think she either just ignored it knowing
that like, that we'd get over, wewould be fine, or she probably came
in and was like, take that, justtake that down, what are you doing?
She kind of indulged our stupid momentsand knew we would figure it out.
They trusted us a lot to figure it out,not in a way that was like, I don't care,
(10:49):
you guys do it, but more just like, theytrusted that we were smart, and that
they had raised good people, and so theylet us kind of, when we did dumb things,
I feel like they kind of let us findour way, cause they knew that we would.
Nancy Harrington (11:06):
She
Amy Harrington (11:06):
was
Nancy Harrington (11:06):
also extremely even keeled.
Extremely like, I can probably thinkof maybe five times in her life
where she got rattled more upset.
She really was justlike, Everything's fine.
If you broke something, itwasn't screaming and mad.
It was like, it's just a thing.
(11:27):
She'd clean it up, move on, youknow, like she was so keeled.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (11:32):
I can see how that would make a huge difference too,
where if you don't get rattled easily,then the environment just feels safer.
You can do things, thingscan happen, life happens.
And as a child, not feeling as if ithas this domino effect on your parents.
I could see how, you know,that really went a long way to
Amy Harrington (11:54):
I also think our dad was the exact opposite.
Our dad was, dad was the, like,emotional, like, where's my metal ruler?
Like, it would totally, like,throw off his whole day.
And our mother, no matter how,like, nutty he got, or emotional he
got, she loved him unconditionally.
And so, His energy wasn't always thegreatest thing to like, as to live by
(12:18):
example, but seeing how much she lovedhim, even when he was kind of at his
worst, always made you feel like, well,
and she would always say tous, there's nothing you can do.
her thing was, did you do your best?
You know, and as long as you did yourbest, that was all she cared about.
So there was just, there was nevera moment in our lives where we
(12:39):
felt unloved or that we could dosomething that would shift that.
Nancy Harrington (12:45):
Yeah.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (12:45):
Yeah.
Okay.
For the people that can't see the videoor aren't watching, I'm crying now.
Nancy Harrington (12:51):
The Harrington wins.
See?
We told you before we started recording.
My favorite story about mymother was I was in high school.
I was a really, really, really shy kid.
And Around the age of like 13, 14, 15.
I, I made this shift that I wasnot going to be shy anymore.
(13:12):
And I was going to tackle theworld and I found punk rock music.
This was in the seventies.
So I found punk rock music and I.
Decided I was gonna cut my hairand it was spiky and it was orange.
I looked like David Bowie on thecover of Pinups and I was, I wore
funky clothes and love it littlein this little town in Braintree,
(13:34):
this little town south of Boston.
And, and you carried a fab box pocketbook.
I carried a pocketbook that wasmade out the fab box that our
older sister Beth had gotten us.
So all the kids.
In high school called me fab woman,which now, when I think about it, I'm
like, I need to revive that nickname.
It's a great nickname.
But back then it wasnot, it was not an honor.
(13:54):
It was, they were teasing me.
And so, I had a hard time in highschool, but one day I was driving
down the street with my mother as abeautiful spring day, our windows were
open in the car and this group of kidsdrove by us in the opposite direction.
And they yelled out the windowpunk rock sucks, which was
like the daily taunt for me.
And my mother had had enough andshe slammed on the brakes and she
(14:19):
turned the car around in the middleof the street and followed them.
And I, in the meantime, amlike under the dashboard, and
she followed them home and she followedthem into their driveway and she got
out of the car and she went over to thecar and she started, I couldn't hear
everything she was saying, but she waswagging her finger at them and saying
(14:42):
things like, You don't know my daughter.
She's wonderful and she's kindand she's smart and you don't know
anything about her and how dare yousay this to her and I, she was my hero.
In that moment.
Like, as you talk aboutrelating to your daughters in
that moment, I was humiliated.
I was under the dashboard.
I was like, mom, how could youdo that to me now at school?
(15:03):
It's going to get worse.
You know, I was humiliated,but God, she was my hero.
Oh,
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (15:09):
that is, yeah, that I can, I can feel that in my core, how great
that must have felt for, for your mom tostand up for you and advocate for you.
And I love how you pointed out thatin the moment it was mortifying.
Yeah.
In retrospect, you realized on agreater scale, what it really means.
Nancy Harrington (15:26):
My mom passed way too young, so it's kind of.
It's great for us to have these memoriesof her and everything we do is in her
honor, you know, how we live our life.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (15:38):
Going back to the idea of being best friends, something
that came up as you were talking aboutthat was what's great about telling
your kids, even if they don't reallyrecognize it or feel it, but telling them
like, no, these are your best friends.
Number one, it makes that normal.
It makes that the standard.
So that they start to show up that way.
(16:01):
And, you know, a lot of siblings mayor may not get along, but to be told,
like, Nope, this is your best friend.
How would you treat a best friend?
And encouraging them to be that kindof person for their sibling, which
isn't something that I necessarilyintentionally, uh, speak out like, of
course they're your siblings, they'reyour blood, but on a day to day basis,
(16:24):
how do friends show up for each other andoften siblings and friends are different.
And the other thing that came up withthat phrase that I just love, is of course
you're going to fight with your siblings.
But they're also your friend, so it kindof makes it okay to fight, and it's okay
for, for this element of, whether it'sconflict, whether it's disagreement, or
(16:46):
whether it's loss, that that is also partof a sibling relationship, but because
you're friends, you see it through.
Amy Harrington (16:54):
yeah.
And I also think like there are fiveof us where we have so much in common,
but we're very different people.
And of course there are those thatwhenever Nancy and our sister Lisa,
who lives in California with us andI are together, if I have to leave
the table, I'm always like, don'ttalk about me because inevitably
like you're going to be like, OhGod, she's driving me crazy today.
(17:16):
It's not like we're, we're the Bradybunch, you know, but, um, But it
always comes back to, I, I don't havemore fun with anybody on the planet.
I don't trust, you know, we havewonderful, significant others and, and
this is not a negative comment againstthem, but it's just built into our core.
I don't trust anybodymore than our family.
(17:39):
It makes you make smarter choices aboutyour friends and your relationships,
because you don't need other people, youchoose the people you want to be around.
So like I personally didn't date alot when I was growing up and I didn't
feel that need to like have a boyfriendbecause I had people who love me.
(18:00):
I was getting love and then when I did geta boyfriend it was like, oh, you know, I
pick someone that I really enjoy and thatI, you know, hopefully my family enjoys.
So it just, it just takes thispressure off of like, Oh my God,
I feel out there by myself andI got to connect with people.
It's like, yeah.
Oh, I connected with that person.
(18:21):
That's nice.
But if I don't, I havethis built in system.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (18:28):
I think that's a great segue into this idea of
sisterhood, which relates to your currentendeavor now and the passionistas.
It's those supports that allowyou to show up more fully in
various aspects of your life.
You know, Amy, you related thatbecause you felt loved at home,
it wasn't as if you were fillinga void when looking at potential
(18:51):
people to date and partners in life.
And I think that that sense ofcommunity is partly, I imagine
what fueled the Passionistas.
Nancy Harrington (19:01):
So, yeah, I mean, Amy and I both had careers in
Hollywood and we, we left them atthe same time and we started pursuing
something together and we ended up inthe world of celebrity interviewing,
which was fabulous and we loved it.
it was really glamorous, really fun,especially to do it together, to talk
to Laverne and Shirley at the sametime, sitting in Penny Marshall's
(19:21):
living room after watching them.
We really had some amazing things,but we just wanted to do something
more impactful and help people.
You know, that's how we wereraised was to help people.
And, so we started the PassionistasProject just as a podcast.
It was really like a side thing.
Like, let's just do this to lift women up.
And, the podcast is the PassionistasProject Podcast, and we interview
(19:43):
women who are following their passions,and we listen to their journey to
inspire other people to take that firststep and, and follow their passions.
And, that escalated and snowballed intoa subscription box of women own products
and our annual women's equality summitthat we bring women from marginalized
communities together to discussissues that are relevant to all of us.
(20:06):
And then a year ago, we, somebodytold us, you are driving down
the road, looking at the map.
You don't know where you're going.
And so we pulled over to theside of the road and decided
to map out our next route.
We spent last year, rebranding andreally figuring out what the women
(20:27):
in our community want and need.
And, that's when wehit upon the idea that.
What they want is what we have,you know, everyone says to us, I
wish I could work with my sister.
I could never work with my sister.
We'd kill each other.
You know, they want thatbond, that unwavering loyalty.
Somebody, you know, has your backsomebody who will be honest, but
(20:51):
kind, And so that's when we realizedthat this needs to be a sisterhood.
What we need to do is welcome people intoour sisterhood and give them what we have.
It's going really well andit's just beautiful to see
the women in the community.
Someone posted a week or so ago.
I'm suffocating.
(21:12):
I'm having a hard time doing this.
And she just, you know, spewed it outand it was so beautiful and vulnerable
and the best part was that people inthe community just started lifting her
up and sharing their stories and sayingthey felt the same way and we're here
for you and it was just so powerfuland it was like the moment we realized,
(21:35):
okay, all of this work was amazing.
Was the right thing to do.
We're on the right track.
This is, this is working.
This is helping people.
And, uh, so yeah, that's what we're doing.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (21:47):
I love that.
I love it.
And, full disclosure, I myself am amember and that's how much I believe in
what you're doing is, you know, being apart of this amazing community of support
and like you said, feeling like there'speople to catch you when you fall or to
give you advice when you aren't quite surewhere you're going, is just priceless,
especially when you have a passion or adream that you may not have others and in
(22:14):
your immediate vicinity and your friendsand family or whatnot, that relate.
I only know maybe oneother podcaster in person.
Everyone else is online.
So for you to offer this space where,hey, whatever you're passionate about,
whatever you need, we've got it is,uh, is really a wonderful thing.
Amy Harrington (22:34):
Thank you.
Yeah.
I mean, one of the great things aboutthe podcast is that we've met so many
amazing women and we always have whoeverwe interview nominate somebody else.
So it's been this spider web.
So we know like wheat farmers and,um, sculptors who melt down nuclear
(22:55):
weapons to make their sculptures.
And like, we've met these women that, youknow, women who own ice cream company.
Um, we've met this likewidest range of people.
So now we're at the pointwhere someone says like, I
need to find blah, blah, blah.
And we're like, Oh, we know, uh, youknow, Korean grocer who lives in Memphis.
(23:16):
You know, it's like we can find,we have this weird, like network.
And if we don't, we can pretty much.
Ask people.
So when people come to the sisterhood,the first thing we do is when someone
introduces themselves or even just signsup, we DM them and we say, you know
what, you need to meet this person.
And we connect them with somebodybecause we, we want everybody to know
(23:40):
each other and support each other.
And ultimately this isn'tabout us and our sisterhood.
It's about this Pre, you know, sharedsisterhood and sisters can be chosen.
You don't have to be born to be sistersand we've witnessed it with our kind
of inner circle of people who havebeen there with us for a long time.
(24:04):
You know, they buy from each other.
They cheer each other on.
We have a wall of women's wins whereyou can post, you know, anything good
that you feel is worth celebratingwith other people, whether that's,
there's one woman who had a billboardin Times Square on New Year's Eve, and
there's someone, you know, we celebratedtaking two weeks off at Christmas.
(24:26):
So it doesn't have to be some huge thing.
It could be a huge thing, but we wantit When one of us wins, we all win.
So that's what sisters do too.
You know, we let each other cry,we hold each other up, but we also
celebrate the wins with each other.
So it's, um, it's really beautiful.
(24:47):
And it is a network of women thatthey aren't just walking the straight
path to, you know, get through life.
They're making choices.
And, and the reason that socialimpact is a big component of it is.
One of the things Nancy and I realizedabout the women in our community is every
one of them, if you have a conversationwith them at some point in the
(25:09):
conversation, says, what can I do for you?
How can I help you?
And we've been on a lot of networkingcalls lately, and that's not true
of every community or every person.
Every woman in our community is like that.
So, um, The love is already thereand people just have to come and the
more they give, the more they'll get.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (25:30):
So how can people find you?
Nancy Harrington (25:32):
The easiest way is to go to the passionistasproject.
com backslash sisterhood.
And that'll tell you about the communityand give you links to either sign up
for the free membership, or if you wantto upgrade to the premium membership,
but there's no pressure to do that.
There's tons of content andinteraction in the free level.
(25:52):
And the other thing we want everyone toknow is that we have scholarship program.
So, for anyone who signs up, Cathas graciously done, is anyone
who signs up for an annualmembership, we gift the scholarship.
A annual membership to somebody whocan't afford to be in the community.
if you really want to sign up for thecommunity, but you just don't have the
means there's an application on ourwebsite and there's also a way to donate
(26:17):
or upgrade your membership so thatsomebody can be a reciprocal of that.
So we're excited aboutthat part of it too.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (26:24):
Fantastic.
So I like to leave the listenerswith a parting quote or affirmation
if one or both of you hassomething you'd like to contribute.
Feel free to share.
Nancy Harrington (26:37):
Um,
Amy Harrington (26:37):
I think
for me it's just,
oh, go ahead.
Nancy Harrington (26:39):
No, you go.
Amy Harrington (26:40):
You go first.
Younger first.
I think for me, uh, I think forme it's just you don't have to
do it alone, whether it's oursisterhood or another sisterhood.
There are people out therethat want to support you.
In a sisterhood like ours, you cancome and you can be yourself and
you can tell people things aren'tperfect and you can ask for help and
(27:04):
we'll be there to give it to you.
So you don't, you don'thave to do it alone.
Nancy Harrington (27:09):
And the quote that's on my mind right now, it's by
Pam Brown, an Australian poet, and shesays, When sisters stand shoulder to
shoulder, who stands a chance against us?
Carmelita Tiu (27:27):
I feel like my takeaways from this conversation cover a broader
range than usual, but here they are.
Number one.
Remind your kids that theirsiblings are their friends.
Maybe even best friends.
And no matter what happens,you have each other.
I know, I hadn't consistently messagedthis in such a direct way to my daughters,
(27:47):
but I started to say this more aftermy conversation with Amy and Nancy.
I think it's good and healthy.
To remind your kids to see theirsiblings as gifts and as positives as
permanent presences in their lives.
And it's up to them to grow andan invest in that relationship.
Number two.
(28:07):
If your kids are arguing.
Help them find the things that theyhave in common or engage them in
activities that will bring them together.
It might be getting them to do the sameactivity, like baking cookies or reminding
them in the middle of an argument thatthey both had long days and are tired.
And so they need to cuteach other, some slack.
Find a way to shift the energy.
(28:29):
Number three.
Model, unconditional love.
Loving your partner.
Loving your kids.
Loving yourself, evenat the worst moments.
Telling your kids that you love them,even when they're not at their best.
All of this conveys to your kids, thatyou will always be there for them.
Focus on the efforts andintent not the outcomes.
(28:50):
Did you do your best?
That's what's important.
Number four.
Be a champion of your kid'sauthentic choices, support their
individuality and stand up for them.
When Amy related the story ofwhen her mom came to her defense.
Following the kids and givingthem a piece of her mind.
It reminded me of the importance, notjust of acceptance, but also advocacy and
(29:14):
sometimes coming to your kid's defense.
How you show up for them nowhas lasting impact on who they
will become in the future.
And number five.
Wherever you're at whatever your struggle.
Remember that you don'thave to do it alone.
Seek out groups like ThePassionistas to support you.
(29:34):
However you need it.
To find out more about the passionistas.
You can visit the passionistasproject.
com or they are on Instagramat the passionistasproject.
You can also type in the passionistason LinkedIn, Facebook YouTube or Google
and it will pull up Amy and Nancy andall the good things that they're doing.
(29:58):
I appreciate your time.
I know that you have choices andhow to spend it and what you're
listening to when you're doinglaundry or commuting and whatnot.
If you like the podcast, share witha friend, hit, follow or subscribe.
If you're on Instagram, follow@knowberaisethem and check out my website,
carmelitatiu.com or knowberaisethem.comif you're interested in more about
(30:21):
the podcast or learning about howwe might be able to work together.
I hope you have an amazingday, week, month even.
And here's to strong women.
May we know them, may we bethem, and may we raise them.
Welcome to know them.
Be them, raise them a show tohelp busy, mindful growth oriented
moms stay informed and inspired,especially as they're navigating
their daughters tween and teen years.
I'm Carmelita too, anunapologetic multihyphenate.
I'm a mom of two girls, a wife, acertified life coach focusing on
(00:23):
holistic personal development formulti-passionate impact driven women.
Also an attorney forcreatives and a podcast host.
So my guests today are sisters,Amy and Nancy Harrington.
They founded the PassionistasProject out of a deep desire to
empower women around the world.
Both walked away from high profilejobs in Hollywood to work together.
(00:48):
Amy was the vice president of postproduction and visual effects for
feature films at Warner Brothers.
So she worked on movies likethe Harry Potter series, The
Matrix, and Batman franchises.
And then Nancy left the ad agencyworld where she created Academy
Award winning campaigns for Miramax.
Now Amy and Nancy shine a lighton the positive stories of self
(01:09):
identified women and non binarypeople through their media company.
They have conducted over 1600 interviews,including red carpet events and more
than 65 one on one oral histories forthe Television Academy Foundation with
pop culture icons like Julia LouisDreyfus, Rita Moreno, Lily Tomlin, Laverne
(01:30):
Cox, Carol Burnett, and many others.
They've also produced interviewsfor the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame,
including a sit down with Mick Jagger.
Who I happen to share a birthdaywith, not the year, but the day.
They were also handpicked by OWNthe Oprah Winfrey network to be
part of the VIP digital press corecovering Oprah's life class during
(01:52):
Oprah's tour of the U S in Toronto.
So clearly these womenare media rock stars.
They decided to found the PassionistasProject in 2018 and through their
podcast, Online Sisterhood andPower of Passionistas Summit.
They strive to inspire women tofollow their passions and join forces
in the fight for equality for all.
(02:14):
All right.
So that is who my guests today are.
One of the things that reallystruck me about the two of them
is how well they get along.
Clearly, they grew up together andrun the Passionistas project together.
But as you'll hear, they're, they'rereally close and you can tell that
they have such love for each other.
And not only that, they credittheir mom with being such a source
(02:39):
of inspiration and love and theyspeak about her with such reverence.
Part of the reason that I enjoyedour conversation so much is it was a
good reminder to me of the potentiallasting impacts of how we show up for
our kids and how that can also impacthow they show up for each other.
(03:00):
I think I'm guilty sometimes of gettingso caught up in the tasks at hand that I
don't really stop to think about, well,in 20, 30, 40 years, what's the vision?
What's one of these hopes thatI have for the two of them?
And what are the hopes that I havefor our relationship when I'm in
my, uh, Eighties, seventies, andthey're, you know, fully grown adults,
(03:24):
potentially with families of their own.
Amy and Nancy are a reminder of what'spossible in the best of ways, between
mothers, daughters, and siblings.
So without further ado,here's our conversation.
amy and Nancy, welcome.
(03:46):
I'm so thrilled to have you here asguests on Know Them, Be Them, Raise Them.
Before I dive any further, I'd loveto turn the, the mic, if you will, over
to both of you to tell the listenersa little bit about yourselves, and
then we'll kind of go from there.
Nancy Harrington (04:02):
So, uh, Amy and I are sisters.
We finish each other's sentencesand share a brain as we like to say.
and we have such a strong bond assisters that we want to offer that
connection to the women in our community.
We've started the Passionistas Projectabout, six or seven years ago, and
we've built an inclusive sisterhoodwhere women can come together.
(04:22):
And get support and feel empoweredto transform their lives.
So we focus on the three pillarsof business development, personal
growth and social impact.
And we have classes and resources andnetworking opportunities and fun parties.
And we have a podcastnetwork and Passionista's TV.
So we have all sorts of things, butit's all about sharing our sisterhood
(04:45):
with everybody because it's suchan unbreakable and beautiful bond.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (04:52):
So, for a little backstory, Amy, Nancy, and I are all part
of a group of women, a mastermind, if youwill, really for honing in on upleveling
the things that we're passionate about.
And as soon as I met Amy and Nancy, Ireally admired the drive and passion
and purpose that they had and we got totalking about what each of us were doing.
(05:13):
They found out that I had a podcastaimed at moms of girls and they shared
in such a beautiful way about theirmother's impact on them and it just
reminded me of, uh, moms and daughtersand the importance of that relationship.
And so I thought it made a lot of senseto bring you both here to take a step back
and speak with adult women to remind usof the various ways we may not even know
(05:39):
that as moms we're impacting our kids.
So, my next question for you is,what was your mother's legacy for you?
Amy Harrington (05:49):
Well, we had the best mom in the world, her name was
Betty, Betty Sacco, she became BettyHarrington, and had five kids, there
are five of us all together, we are thetwo youngest of five, we have an older
sister who's a filmmaker named Beth,our sister Lisa is a crochet artist.
Our brother is, uh, was a musician andnow is a bankruptcy attorney who has had
(06:13):
a case in front of the Supreme Court.
And then Nancy and I areout there doing our thing.
So, the most important thing ourmother ever taught us was your
brother and your sisters areyour best friends in the world.
And no matter what happens, You haveeach other and we've been through a
lot together and inevitably we're allthere for each other every single time.
(06:38):
So that is her true legacy.
And, and besides that, shewas just a very kind person.
Both our mother and father were, creative.
They met in art school.
Our dad had an advertising agency andour mother studied to be an art teacher.
So we grew up in a household where.
We were surrounded by music andtelevision and movies and art and could
(07:02):
use our dad's expensive art suppliesto doodle and never were told anything.
else but follow your passions, youknow, trust in yourself to do the
creative things you want to do.
There was never any hesitation like,Oh, you're Nancy's going to open
(07:23):
her own graphic design business.
Oh yeah, of course youopen your own business.
That's what you do.
Or I'm going to move to Californiafrom Braintree, Massachusetts, and I'm
going to get into the film industry.
And as much as they didn't wantme to go, it was never like,
you're never going to get a job.
It was like, okay.
You know, we'll missyou but you can do it.
So we just were really, really lucky thatour passions were supported and encouraged
(07:48):
from the minute we were born, and we wereborn into a group of five best friends who
have been by our side, our entire lives.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (07:57):
Out of curiosity, when you mentioned this
messaging about Being told that youare your each other's best friend.
How did that feel in momentswhere maybe you were arguing?
Because I would love to say that to mydaughters, but I could also imagine,
it not resonating at certain pointswhen they're arguing or bickering.
Nancy Harrington (08:18):
I think what makes us unusual, even more so is
that We didn't argue that much.
You know, I think my brother and Iprobably butted heads most because
we were really close in age, and,you know, I was his first little
sister so he could be bratty with me.
But, Amy and I hardlyever argue even as adults.
, the only time we really get into fightsis when we're traveling and we're hangry.
(08:42):
But, you know, when she said it, itwas usually when, maybe we were, you
know, You know, cranky and fightingover crayons or something, but it always
resonated it whenever our mother spoketo us, she had this way about her that
made us stop and think, Oh, she's right.
(09:02):
Even if we didn't want to hear it.
We're like,
You know, she just had thatway about her and we used to
say she gave us the evil eye.
Like if we were doing somethingshe didn't approve of, she didn't
really have to say anything to us.
She just gave us a look and we werelike, Oh, okay, mom, I'll stop.
. Carmelita (Cat) Tiu: That totally resonates. (09:22):
undefined
My mom was the same way.
She had this glance.
And when we saw the glance, weknew to stop what we're doing.
Something was off.
This does not jive with mom.
So, I totally get that.
Amy Harrington (09:37):
I also think she was good at helping us find, like if we were
bickering or if we were Mad at each otherfor some stupid reason like she helped
us find the thing that brought us backtogether you know whether that was like
baking chocolate chip cookies or Watchinga TV show together or going to the mall
(09:57):
and walking around like she found someway to shift the energy and Have us
find a way to have fun together again.
Nancy Harrington (10:07):
How did she get us to do, remember the time we put
the line of tape down the middleof the room, Brady Bunch style?
Although our door was on one side, so wehad to make like a corridor to get to it.
How did she get us, how didshe get us to get past that?
Do you remember?
Amy Harrington (10:25):
I don't, I, I think she either just ignored it knowing
that like, that we'd get over, wewould be fine, or she probably came
in and was like, take that, justtake that down, what are you doing?
She kind of indulged our stupid momentsand knew we would figure it out.
They trusted us a lot to figure it out,not in a way that was like, I don't care,
(10:49):
you guys do it, but more just like, theytrusted that we were smart, and that
they had raised good people, and so theylet us kind of, when we did dumb things,
I feel like they kind of let us findour way, cause they knew that we would.
Nancy Harrington (11:06):
She
Amy Harrington (11:06):
was
Nancy Harrington (11:06):
also extremely even keeled.
Extremely like, I can probably thinkof maybe five times in her life
where she got rattled more upset.
She really was justlike, Everything's fine.
If you broke something, itwasn't screaming and mad.
It was like, it's just a thing.
(11:27):
She'd clean it up, move on, youknow, like she was so keeled.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (11:32):
I can see how that would make a huge difference too,
where if you don't get rattled easily,then the environment just feels safer.
You can do things, thingscan happen, life happens.
And as a child, not feeling as if ithas this domino effect on your parents.
I could see how, you know,that really went a long way to
Amy Harrington (11:54):
I also think our dad was the exact opposite.
Our dad was, dad was the, like,emotional, like, where's my metal ruler?
Like, it would totally, like,throw off his whole day.
And our mother, no matter how,like, nutty he got, or emotional he
got, she loved him unconditionally.
And so, His energy wasn't always thegreatest thing to like, as to live by
(12:18):
example, but seeing how much she lovedhim, even when he was kind of at his
worst, always made you feel like, well,
and she would always say tous, there's nothing you can do.
her thing was, did you do your best?
You know, and as long as you did yourbest, that was all she cared about.
So there was just, there was nevera moment in our lives where we
(12:39):
felt unloved or that we could dosomething that would shift that.
Nancy Harrington (12:45):
Yeah.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (12:45):
Yeah.
Okay.
For the people that can't see the videoor aren't watching, I'm crying now.
Nancy Harrington (12:51):
The Harrington wins.
See?
We told you before we started recording.
My favorite story about mymother was I was in high school.
I was a really, really, really shy kid.
And Around the age of like 13, 14, 15.
I, I made this shift that I wasnot going to be shy anymore.
(13:12):
And I was going to tackle theworld and I found punk rock music.
This was in the seventies.
So I found punk rock music and I.
Decided I was gonna cut my hairand it was spiky and it was orange.
I looked like David Bowie on thecover of Pinups and I was, I wore
funky clothes and love it littlein this little town in Braintree,
(13:34):
this little town south of Boston.
And, and you carried a fab box pocketbook.
I carried a pocketbook that wasmade out the fab box that our
older sister Beth had gotten us.
So all the kids.
In high school called me fab woman,which now, when I think about it, I'm
like, I need to revive that nickname.
It's a great nickname.
But back then it wasnot, it was not an honor.
(13:54):
It was, they were teasing me.
And so, I had a hard time in highschool, but one day I was driving
down the street with my mother as abeautiful spring day, our windows were
open in the car and this group of kidsdrove by us in the opposite direction.
And they yelled out the windowpunk rock sucks, which was
like the daily taunt for me.
And my mother had had enough andshe slammed on the brakes and she
(14:19):
turned the car around in the middleof the street and followed them.
And I, in the meantime, amlike under the dashboard, and
she followed them home and she followedthem into their driveway and she got
out of the car and she went over to thecar and she started, I couldn't hear
everything she was saying, but she waswagging her finger at them and saying
(14:42):
things like, You don't know my daughter.
She's wonderful and she's kindand she's smart and you don't know
anything about her and how dare yousay this to her and I, she was my hero.
In that moment.
Like, as you talk aboutrelating to your daughters in
that moment, I was humiliated.
I was under the dashboard.
I was like, mom, how could youdo that to me now at school?
(15:03):
It's going to get worse.
You know, I was humiliated,but God, she was my hero.
Oh,
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (15:09):
that is, yeah, that I can, I can feel that in my core, how great
that must have felt for, for your mom tostand up for you and advocate for you.
And I love how you pointed out thatin the moment it was mortifying.
Yeah.
In retrospect, you realized on agreater scale, what it really means.
Nancy Harrington (15:26):
My mom passed way too young, so it's kind of.
It's great for us to have these memoriesof her and everything we do is in her
honor, you know, how we live our life.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (15:38):
Going back to the idea of being best friends, something
that came up as you were talking aboutthat was what's great about telling
your kids, even if they don't reallyrecognize it or feel it, but telling them
like, no, these are your best friends.
Number one, it makes that normal.
It makes that the standard.
So that they start to show up that way.
(16:01):
And, you know, a lot of siblings mayor may not get along, but to be told,
like, Nope, this is your best friend.
How would you treat a best friend?
And encouraging them to be that kindof person for their sibling, which
isn't something that I necessarilyintentionally, uh, speak out like, of
course they're your siblings, they'reyour blood, but on a day to day basis,
(16:24):
how do friends show up for each other andoften siblings and friends are different.
And the other thing that came up withthat phrase that I just love, is of course
you're going to fight with your siblings.
But they're also your friend, so it kindof makes it okay to fight, and it's okay
for, for this element of, whether it'sconflict, whether it's disagreement, or
(16:46):
whether it's loss, that that is also partof a sibling relationship, but because
you're friends, you see it through.
Amy Harrington (16:54):
yeah.
And I also think like there are fiveof us where we have so much in common,
but we're very different people.
And of course there are those thatwhenever Nancy and our sister Lisa,
who lives in California with us andI are together, if I have to leave
the table, I'm always like, don'ttalk about me because inevitably
like you're going to be like, OhGod, she's driving me crazy today.
(17:16):
It's not like we're, we're the Bradybunch, you know, but, um, But it
always comes back to, I, I don't havemore fun with anybody on the planet.
I don't trust, you know, we havewonderful, significant others and, and
this is not a negative comment againstthem, but it's just built into our core.
I don't trust anybodymore than our family.
(17:39):
It makes you make smarter choices aboutyour friends and your relationships,
because you don't need other people, youchoose the people you want to be around.
So like I personally didn't date alot when I was growing up and I didn't
feel that need to like have a boyfriendbecause I had people who love me.
(18:00):
I was getting love and then when I did geta boyfriend it was like, oh, you know, I
pick someone that I really enjoy and thatI, you know, hopefully my family enjoys.
So it just, it just takes thispressure off of like, Oh my God,
I feel out there by myself andI got to connect with people.
It's like, yeah.
Oh, I connected with that person.
(18:21):
That's nice.
But if I don't, I havethis built in system.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (18:28):
I think that's a great segue into this idea of
sisterhood, which relates to your currentendeavor now and the passionistas.
It's those supports that allowyou to show up more fully in
various aspects of your life.
You know, Amy, you related thatbecause you felt loved at home,
it wasn't as if you were fillinga void when looking at potential
(18:51):
people to date and partners in life.
And I think that that sense ofcommunity is partly, I imagine
what fueled the Passionistas.
Nancy Harrington (19:01):
So, yeah, I mean, Amy and I both had careers in
Hollywood and we, we left them atthe same time and we started pursuing
something together and we ended up inthe world of celebrity interviewing,
which was fabulous and we loved it.
it was really glamorous, really fun,especially to do it together, to talk
to Laverne and Shirley at the sametime, sitting in Penny Marshall's
(19:21):
living room after watching them.
We really had some amazing things,but we just wanted to do something
more impactful and help people.
You know, that's how we wereraised was to help people.
And, so we started the PassionistasProject just as a podcast.
It was really like a side thing.
Like, let's just do this to lift women up.
And, the podcast is the PassionistasProject Podcast, and we interview
(19:43):
women who are following their passions,and we listen to their journey to
inspire other people to take that firststep and, and follow their passions.
And, that escalated and snowballed intoa subscription box of women own products
and our annual women's equality summitthat we bring women from marginalized
communities together to discussissues that are relevant to all of us.
(20:06):
And then a year ago, we, somebodytold us, you are driving down
the road, looking at the map.
You don't know where you're going.
And so we pulled over to theside of the road and decided
to map out our next route.
We spent last year, rebranding andreally figuring out what the women
(20:27):
in our community want and need.
And, that's when wehit upon the idea that.
What they want is what we have,you know, everyone says to us, I
wish I could work with my sister.
I could never work with my sister.
We'd kill each other.
You know, they want thatbond, that unwavering loyalty.
Somebody, you know, has your backsomebody who will be honest, but
(20:51):
kind, And so that's when we realizedthat this needs to be a sisterhood.
What we need to do is welcome people intoour sisterhood and give them what we have.
It's going really well andit's just beautiful to see
the women in the community.
Someone posted a week or so ago.
I'm suffocating.
(21:12):
I'm having a hard time doing this.
And she just, you know, spewed it outand it was so beautiful and vulnerable
and the best part was that people inthe community just started lifting her
up and sharing their stories and sayingthey felt the same way and we're here
for you and it was just so powerfuland it was like the moment we realized,
(21:35):
okay, all of this work was amazing.
Was the right thing to do.
We're on the right track.
This is, this is working.
This is helping people.
And, uh, so yeah, that's what we're doing.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (21:47):
I love that.
I love it.
And, full disclosure, I myself am amember and that's how much I believe in
what you're doing is, you know, being apart of this amazing community of support
and like you said, feeling like there'speople to catch you when you fall or to
give you advice when you aren't quite surewhere you're going, is just priceless,
especially when you have a passion or adream that you may not have others and in
(22:14):
your immediate vicinity and your friendsand family or whatnot, that relate.
I only know maybe oneother podcaster in person.
Everyone else is online.
So for you to offer this space where,hey, whatever you're passionate about,
whatever you need, we've got it is,uh, is really a wonderful thing.
Amy Harrington (22:34):
Thank you.
Yeah.
I mean, one of the great things aboutthe podcast is that we've met so many
amazing women and we always have whoeverwe interview nominate somebody else.
So it's been this spider web.
So we know like wheat farmers and,um, sculptors who melt down nuclear
(22:55):
weapons to make their sculptures.
And like, we've met these women that, youknow, women who own ice cream company.
Um, we've met this likewidest range of people.
So now we're at the pointwhere someone says like, I
need to find blah, blah, blah.
And we're like, Oh, we know, uh, youknow, Korean grocer who lives in Memphis.
(23:16):
You know, it's like we can find,we have this weird, like network.
And if we don't, we can pretty much.
Ask people.
So when people come to the sisterhood,the first thing we do is when someone
introduces themselves or even just signsup, we DM them and we say, you know
what, you need to meet this person.
And we connect them with somebodybecause we, we want everybody to know
(23:40):
each other and support each other.
And ultimately this isn'tabout us and our sisterhood.
It's about this Pre, you know, sharedsisterhood and sisters can be chosen.
You don't have to be born to be sistersand we've witnessed it with our kind
of inner circle of people who havebeen there with us for a long time.
(24:04):
You know, they buy from each other.
They cheer each other on.
We have a wall of women's wins whereyou can post, you know, anything good
that you feel is worth celebratingwith other people, whether that's,
there's one woman who had a billboardin Times Square on New Year's Eve, and
there's someone, you know, we celebratedtaking two weeks off at Christmas.
(24:26):
So it doesn't have to be some huge thing.
It could be a huge thing, but we wantit When one of us wins, we all win.
So that's what sisters do too.
You know, we let each other cry,we hold each other up, but we also
celebrate the wins with each other.
So it's, um, it's really beautiful.
(24:47):
And it is a network of women thatthey aren't just walking the straight
path to, you know, get through life.
They're making choices.
And, and the reason that socialimpact is a big component of it is.
One of the things Nancy and I realizedabout the women in our community is every
one of them, if you have a conversationwith them at some point in the
(25:09):
conversation, says, what can I do for you?
How can I help you?
And we've been on a lot of networkingcalls lately, and that's not true
of every community or every person.
Every woman in our community is like that.
So, um, The love is already thereand people just have to come and the
more they give, the more they'll get.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (25:30):
So how can people find you?
Nancy Harrington (25:32):
The easiest way is to go to the passionistasproject.
com backslash sisterhood.
And that'll tell you about the communityand give you links to either sign up
for the free membership, or if you wantto upgrade to the premium membership,
but there's no pressure to do that.
There's tons of content andinteraction in the free level.
(25:52):
And the other thing we want everyone toknow is that we have scholarship program.
So, for anyone who signs up, Cathas graciously done, is anyone
who signs up for an annualmembership, we gift the scholarship.
A annual membership to somebody whocan't afford to be in the community.
if you really want to sign up for thecommunity, but you just don't have the
means there's an application on ourwebsite and there's also a way to donate
(26:17):
or upgrade your membership so thatsomebody can be a reciprocal of that.
So we're excited aboutthat part of it too.
Carmelita (Cat) Tiu (26:24):
Fantastic.
So I like to leave the listenerswith a parting quote or affirmation
if one or both of you hassomething you'd like to contribute.
Feel free to share.
Nancy Harrington (26:37):
Um,
Amy Harrington (26:37):
I think
for me it's just,
oh, go ahead.
Nancy Harrington (26:39):
No, you go.
Amy Harrington (26:40):
You go first.
Younger first.
I think for me, uh, I think forme it's just you don't have to
do it alone, whether it's oursisterhood or another sisterhood.
There are people out therethat want to support you.
In a sisterhood like ours, you cancome and you can be yourself and
you can tell people things aren'tperfect and you can ask for help and
(27:04):
we'll be there to give it to you.
So you don't, you don'thave to do it alone.
Nancy Harrington (27:09):
And the quote that's on my mind right now, it's by
Pam Brown, an Australian poet, and shesays, When sisters stand shoulder to
shoulder, who stands a chance against us?
Carmelita Tiu (27:27):
I feel like my takeaways from this conversation cover a broader
range than usual, but here they are.
Number one.
Remind your kids that theirsiblings are their friends.
Maybe even best friends.
And no matter what happens,you have each other.
I know, I hadn't consistently messagedthis in such a direct way to my daughters,
(27:47):
but I started to say this more aftermy conversation with Amy and Nancy.
I think it's good and healthy.
To remind your kids to see theirsiblings as gifts and as positives as
permanent presences in their lives.
And it's up to them to grow andan invest in that relationship.
Number two.
(28:07):
If your kids are arguing.
Help them find the things that theyhave in common or engage them in
activities that will bring them together.
It might be getting them to do the sameactivity, like baking cookies or reminding
them in the middle of an argument thatthey both had long days and are tired.
And so they need to cuteach other, some slack.
Find a way to shift the energy.
(28:29):
Number three.
Model, unconditional love.
Loving your partner.
Loving your kids.
Loving yourself, evenat the worst moments.
Telling your kids that you love them,even when they're not at their best.
All of this conveys to your kids, thatyou will always be there for them.
Focus on the efforts andintent not the outcomes.
(28:50):
Did you do your best?
That's what's important.
Number four.
Be a champion of your kid'sauthentic choices, support their
individuality and stand up for them.
When Amy related the story ofwhen her mom came to her defense.
Following the kids and givingthem a piece of her mind.
It reminded me of the importance, notjust of acceptance, but also advocacy and
(29:14):
sometimes coming to your kid's defense.
How you show up for them nowhas lasting impact on who they
will become in the future.
And number five.
Wherever you're at whatever your struggle.
Remember that you don'thave to do it alone.
Seek out groups like ThePassionistas to support you.
(29:34):
However you need it.
To find out more about the passionistas.
You can visit the passionistasproject.
com or they are on Instagramat the passionistasproject.
You can also type in the passionistason LinkedIn, Facebook YouTube or Google
and it will pull up Amy and Nancy andall the good things that they're doing.
(29:58):
I appreciate your time.
I know that you have choices andhow to spend it and what you're
listening to when you're doinglaundry or commuting and whatnot.
If you like the podcast, share witha friend, hit, follow or subscribe.
If you're on Instagram, follow@knowberaisethem and check out my website,
carmelitatiu.com or knowberaisethem.comif you're interested in more about
(30:21):
the podcast or learning about howwe might be able to work together.
I hope you have an amazingday, week, month even.
And here's to strong women.
May we know them, may we bethem, and may we raise them.
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