Cliff Crawling & Guava Guzzling (Ep. 8)

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A week that begins with holiday jokes and a COD camo grind escalates into an all‑day push along Kauai’s Nā Pali Coast—equal parts gorgeous and unforgiving. I talk through the prep that almost fell apart at 5 a.m., when my hydration bladder leaked and I turned my backpack into a rolling ice chest of frozen guava. The jungle hum at dawn, the mental fatigue of walking loose slopes above the Pacific, and the infamous Crawler’s Ledge all meet a steady dose of realism: what’s actually scary isn’t the hype point, it’s the quiet, angled paths that slide when you stop paying attention.

Reaching Kalalau Beach delivers a reward that hits like myth—shade, caves, slushy guava, and a reminder that rip currents don’t care how far you came. On the way back, I detour into a canyon where GPS signals die between 300‑foot walls, chase waterfalls, and coax my way across sketchy crossings with more patience than pride. The pack weight bruises my collarbones, the miles add up, and dinner that night tastes like victory because it was earned.

Then comes the curveball: a surfing lesson on a battered toe, a chest rubbed raw against a board, and a sunburn on the parts that never see daylight. It’s funny and a little painful, but it sticks the landing on one theme—gear isn’t vanity when it saves skin, and pacing isn’t weakness when it keeps you moving tomorrow. Along the way, I share a new mic splurge, an Etsy art impulse, and a hard truth about the habit that might be slowing my broken foot’s healing. If you’ve ever carried too much, learned mid‑adventure, or found bliss in a cold drink at the exact right moment, this one’s for you.

Listen now, then tell me: what’s the smartest change you’ve made mid‑adventure that saved the day? Subscribe, share with a friend who loves trail stories, and drop a review to help us keep exploring.

Episode Transcript

SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
Hey yo gang, welcome back.
We're another week, uh anotherweek down, another week in the
books, closer to Thanksgiving.
Seems late this year.
I mean it's gotta be.
It's like December, right after.
It's going straight from Turkeyto all I want for Christmas is
you bopping on the radio.
I mean, it's overplayed, but Istill fuck with the heavy, you

(00:20):
know.
Although I want to know how muchbread cheese Mariah Carey is
holding off that song is crazy.
It's like real life infinitemoney glitch.
I need one of those.
What's the next seasonal hitsong?
What can I write a good songfor?
Hmm.
I mean, Christmas, that's that'slocked out.
I mean, I feel like maybe like aI was gonna say like 4th of

(00:40):
July, but like I guess like thenational anthem, but maybe maybe
there's like some alternative4th of July Bob.
I feel like it's another bigAmerican holiday, many other
ones.
Easter, I feel like it's justnot as like quite as festive,
but I mean holidays meanThanksgiving songs.
I guess there's like no likethere's like spooky music for

(01:01):
Halloween, maybe ThanksgivingBob.
Half you can cook in the studiofor that one.
But yeah, it's been a busy week.
I mean I I didn't get shit done,but I I got shit done, you know.
Um New Call of Duty came out.
Did the typical, you know, throwmoney at Activision for the same

(01:22):
shit that's been rinsed andrepeated, but spent the week,
grinded to get uh the diamondsnipers, and that was a good
time, got to prestige, andprobably won't play it until the
next one comes out.
We'll see.
Maybe I'll maybe I'll play more.
I didn't really try the zombiesat all.
Looks interesting, and the thestory mode looks wild, looks
like there's like some crazyweird boss fight.

(01:45):
Although maybe you can't evenpause the game or some whack
stuff, but the movement has beendecent.
It's kind of like a weirdin-between of like BO6 and BO3.
There's some like wall jumping,but not like the full, like
whatever you called that, likewhere you could do the exo jump
and stuff like that.
A little bit closer.
Although I feel like it's Imean, it's it's I don't know.

(02:10):
I don't play enough to like havea super great comparison, but
they all kind of feel the sameat this point.
But you know, I'm had a goodtime.
Unlocked some cops some likemonster.
I don't know, they have somepromo, I feel like every year.
And I feel like they used tohave it for the Mountain Dew,
but they don't have as much thathave that as much anymore.
But now it's like monster stuff,or you can get like some monster

(02:31):
like a sniper, monster likeenergy the energy drink.
They have some like promos forlike some dude wearing like a
monster hat, and you can get asniper, so I had to like pay
like 10 bucks for like to buy acoat for that, so I could you
know really be dripped out as Iwas racking up um sniper kills.
There's only like three snipersthough, so it's pretty quick.
Although one was probably one ofthe most painful guns I've ever

(02:52):
used in my life for whateverreason the last sniper you
unlock.
It's it's like one of thosethree-round burst type beats,
but uh it's got like a delaybefore you before it even like
it's got like whatever, likeit's kind of makes like the
spin-up sound and then shootsout the three bullets, like the
the triple burst.
But that delay when you'retrying to get you also need to
get headshots with it.

(03:12):
It was that was that waspainful.
I mean, it wasn't why I feellike the threshold to get like
gold stuff has gone down overthe call of duties.
I feel like it's took me awaylonger.
Maybe it's not.
Maybe I was just like a littlescrub, but back in the day.
I mean, I'm not good great now,but uh it it was very
frustrating for a while, liketrying to get used to that

(03:33):
because you can't like quickscope with that.
You just got a hard scope andjust like keep spamming the
trigger because the delay isjust the most frustrating.
Like you like aim and pull thetrigger, and then it's like
nothing happens, and then it'slike you get you get blue balls
by your own sniper and get awayfrom that.
But we grinded it out, got theit's not called diamond, I
forget what it's called.
Arc light?
I don't know.

(03:53):
It's a little bit of a whackone.
It's not I like the kind of thethe real blingy, just actual
diamond ones that used to havemade more back in the day.
But I don't remember what it wasfrom B06, but I guess they try
to make it not exactly the same.
We'll see.
I mean, I don't reallyanticipate playing more than
that.
Maybe, maybe there's a goodreason.
I haven't played Warzone in aminute.
I mean, I feel like I haven'treally played that since the

(04:15):
pandemic when the whole gangwas, you know, dropping in on
Verdansk.
That was the good times, goodmemories pilots the pandemic
there.
But we'll see.
Because I feel like I don'tknow, I don't really actually
pay attention to these types ofgames, but they're fun.
I know there's like Battlefieldsis a six.

(04:36):
I feel like I have no idea whatnumber they're on.
And they finally had their ownlike Warzone equivalent.
I don't know.
I mean, I feel like it's kindathere's everyone's got one.
The one that is I played was thea lot of not so much this week,
but prior was like the Simpsons,the Fortnite Simpsons, which is
pretty it was prettyentertaining.
I think there's supposed to besome big event for the Fortnite

(05:00):
fiends out there.
I where it's like I I sawsomething about Simpsons and
Godzilla.
Maybe there's a bunch of otherstuff going on, but the
Godzilla, that one hooked me andpulled me, and I'm like, I want
to see Godzilla eat a Simpsonsdonut or something.
I don't actually know anythingabout it.
I don't think I've gone to orlike watched any of like the the
Fortnite live events since maybelike the the Travis Scott one

(05:23):
back in the day, pre uh theoriginal Astro World uh
shenanigans before uh theunfortunate ones later on.
But yeah, although I think I hadan epiphany while I was uh you
know grinding out um getting thethe gold and diamond camos for
snipers, I was sitting, uh, andI think I realized out of like

(05:47):
habit, you know, how younormally like will sit with one
leg crossed over the other whereyou have like your one foot on
the knee.
I'm just you know trying toexplain that um easier to show
you, but I think you get thepicture.
Uh I do that a lot, but I put myfoot under my knee, so I'm like
kind of sitting on like with myone foot like under my knee with

(06:09):
my like thigh on top of it.
Uh and I always do that on theone side where I'm basically
sitting on my broken foot, and Idon't know why it took me five
months to realize that is thatI'm doing that.
I think it's just because it'slike a reflex.
I don't ever think about it.
I just end up doing that, andI'm like, I sit like this all
the time, and this foot isbroken.
I wonder if that has anything todo with the fact that this foot

(06:29):
has not fully healed in fivemonths of being broken, even
though I'm actually relativelybehaving more now in terms of
wearing boots and stuff.
I mean, I do some things thatlike are probably risky, but I
still feel like it's beenexceptionally slow.
I've even been taking my calciumgummies on them flintstone
gummies.
It's not flintstone, it's someuh Costco on some Kirkland

(06:50):
signature gang.
But been abusing calcium, tryingto, you know, really get them
calcium bones growing, you know,really, really build that up,
get them bones healthy andstrong, eat my veggies, all of
that.
Uh, but hasn't made adifference, it's still been
really slow.
But I just realized that.
And I wonder, I mean, I'm prettysure that probably uh has some

(07:13):
impact on the very uh slowhealing that I've seen.
But I'm gonna try not to do it.
I don't know, maybe I gotta putlike put a thumb tack on my
foot, like tape it, somethingthere, sort of like pokes me or
zaps me, so I don't do it.
Because I don't even I mean it'sbeen five months that I've been
doing it, probably.
So or I probably just got I meanI should just wear the boot

(07:34):
inside or something, but that'sannoying.
But maybe that's honestlyprobably the best solution.
I should have been doing it thewhole time.
Maybe maybe if I do that, notfor this next month.
I mean, even without that, Iwould hope it's healed in a
month.
We'll see, we'll see.
Could be a little bit longer.
It's been really slow, but Ifeel like I would like to think
that as it keeps getting morehealed, it should be quicker

(07:56):
because I mean starting off onthe x-rays, it was like a big
gap on my bones where on thebroken one, it was like a big
and it's like slowly closing in.
So I feel like maybe not.
It's kind of like also likebroken, like three pieces.
So it was like like a piece islike here, here, and here, and
they're kind of like all growcoming together.
So I feel like as it keepsgetting all closer, that would

(08:16):
maybe be easier, but I don'tknow.
I'm not a doctor, maybe someday,but that's the next, you know,
implementation.
My uh relaxing.
I mean, it's a walk bunny.
My my walking boot is is lookinga little rough.
I've like totally worn off thetread on the heel.
It's probably I mean, if I thinkabout it, it's definitely it's

(08:38):
right of the miles.
That walking boot is probably Imean, I feel like it's fair to
say it's got at least a hundredmiles of walking on it.
I mean, it could be more thanthat.
Like on yeah, it could be morelike 200.
I don't think that's anexaggeration.
And it's definitely not meantfor mileage, so it's getting

(08:58):
it's gotten real clicky.
I feel like a bad bitch walkingdown the hallway in some Slidos
because there's no rubber tread,it's just like the hard plastic
bottom of the boot clicking onthe concrete or the hallways
that I'm walking down.
And it's a little bit annoying,but it's also kind of
satisfying.
Cluck, click, click,cluckety-cluck.
I feel like if I got put anotherboot on or I could like tap
dance or something with that.
Um, but I don't really want tospend$50 for another boot,

(09:21):
especially when it's hopefullyonly another week, uh few weeks,
month maybe, that I'm needingit.
Um, and I didn't really,although I did almost uh totally
wipe out because it's not gotthe best traction.
And I was like walking around ona rainy day, and there's like,
you know, it's fall, so there'sleaves everywhere, so like the
wet leaves on some likeconcrete.

(09:43):
I about like did the splits.
Actually, I almost the splitsagain too.
Yesterday when I walked into myapartment, I, you know, walk in,
take a step in, uh, drop my bag,take another step, and about do
the splits.
Um I was like, what the hell?
How come what did I do?
Because I just stepped and likeone foot just like went sliding.
And then I realized uh my puppyhad just yakked a giant puddle

(10:08):
by the door while I was gone,and I did not see when I was
walking in and just did thesplits in that.
I was I was not pumped aboutthat to realize about did the
splits and vomit.
Um luckily it was uh it wasn'tlike I don't think it was like
vomit vomit.
I think she just sometimes willlike chug like her entire water
dish uh at once without hardlytaking a break to breathe.

(10:30):
And normally when I hear that,I'm like, hey, yo, take a
breather, time out, time out,flag on the play, hold on, just
you know, digest for a second.
Um, because she'll do that andthen like a minute later she'll
just like vomit it up, like justa big pile of water.
So it wasn't like not likechunky or colored, but it was
just a big pile of slides, it'sactually like a pile of slime.
It's kind of disgusting when youtry to clean it up because like

(10:51):
you poke part of this puddle andit all moves.
It looks like it's actuallylooks exactly like egg white.
It's like clear, but it's likegot some like more texture to it
than just like a puddle ofwater, and it's kind of hard to
like clean up, especially whenthere's a big puddle of it.
It's like you try to like wipeit and it all just like kind of
slides around.
It's it's kind of disgusting.
And then I like uh wipe off mylike or wash off my shoe that
was just kind of covered in theslime.

(11:13):
It's kind of like maybe I kindof imagine it is like if you had
like the slime awards fromNickelodeon, but just
transparent.
That's kind of what it givesoff.
Um yeah.
Do they still do that or arethey like just slime about the
people?
I feel like it's gonna be hardon the stuff.
I don't know where they do it.
I just always remember when Iwas a kid seeing that on TV,
they're just dumping slime onpeople.
You know, I feel like they gottabe careful where they do it.

(11:35):
Um because I feel like, yeah, Ifeel there's probably I don't
know if Yeah, there's likesomething there's like the sperm
races.
I don't know if y'all saw that.
It was like some I think theymaybe did a few of them where
they you know do exactly whatthey sound like, have a little
mini track for you know somedudes to race their nuts, see
who's got the fastest swimmerson track.

(11:56):
Um but the loser, they also getslimed out in the same way with
like a a tube of slime, whateverit looks like a questionable
color.
It's a little bit more white toit, not totally transparent.
Um, and it's not the greenslime.
But they got like a proportionedoff area for that, or portion, I
don't know, like a tube wherethey go in, they just get you
know get real blue khaki gang,dude.

(12:17):
But uh that's uh that's adifferent thing.
I feel like the slime, theNickelodeon, they just dump it
everywhere.
Although with those sperm races,I feel like the first one I
watched, I was I was a skepticalabout it.
I want to know, like, is thatlike legit?
It feels like almost I was like,is this AI?
I mean I know it's not AI, but Imean the races especially seemed

(12:39):
like somewhat staged to me.
Just because like one of them onthe first one, like it was like
blown out of the it was like abest of three race where they
had them go off three times, andin the first two, like the the
swimmers just totally stoppedfrom from one dude halfway
through the race on both ofthem.
Like, I don't know if they hadsome like you know, gel in this

(13:02):
little matrix that we couldn'tsee, and they just halted.
But I don't know.
I mean, I feel like that wouldhonestly be thought plausibly
pretty easy to do.
Put something in there thatwould stop them from swimming
that you couldn't really see, orI don't even know what we're
seeing on there, honestly.
I guess they could just bebroadcasting anything.
I mean, yeah, I would you knowprobably be tempted to do that

(13:24):
if I were like a producer, youknow, make it the most hype.
It was it was kind of hype, itwas kind of entertaining.
It was a little bit wild, awacky event, but it was
entertaining.
I don't know that I'd watch alot of them though.
I think the one-off one wasentertaining enough.
They had some interesting uhhosts and characters, so check
it out, I guess, if you'reintrigued.

(13:45):
Where was I going with that?
No, I think I was just talkingabout oh, yeah, vomit.
Compare that to slime.
Don't have any electronics toworry about.
I feel like yeah, they couldeven just yeah, slime out their
mics even.
Oh, speaking of mics, we did geta new mic, blew some uh money on
a Black Friday sale.
Hopefully, you know, we reallyupgrading the quality out here

(14:06):
slowly, you know, getting moreprofessional.
Although I don't know that wecan get more professional, it's
just you know, a little morebells and whistles are already
pretty impeccable.
But that's our deal, so I had tocop.
I've kind of been looking atthem.
We're you know, we're moving upin the world gang.
And you know, holler if thisaudio is impeccable.

(14:27):
I think I actually have no idea.
I don't even I'm hoping I'mhooking it up right and that
this is actually even recordingaudio.
I'll be pissed if I'm justseeing my like my lips flapping
on the camera.
I see this thing with a lighton, so I think that means it's
recording.
I don't actually know what I'mdoing on most things, but we're
gonna see.
Uh, but that was the first BlackFriday impulsive purchase, and

(14:48):
there'll probably be more tocome.
Speaking of, I brought an itemfor show and tell.
I figured, you know, this mightbe a good section to uh include.
Actually, I don't think it'smaybe necessarily good to
include, but I figured I willtake a minute to uh show off my
impulsive purchase of the weekbecause I tend to do that at
least once a week, and it'sdefinitely not financially wise

(15:11):
for me.
I have too much junk, although II mean it's fun, you know.
I'm a material girl in thematerial world.
Is that how the song goes?
Something like that.
It's a bop.
Um, but you know, I definitelyembrace capitalism game, as you
can tell.

(15:31):
But without further ado, here'swhat I impulsively bought this
week another random piece of artoff Etsy.
I think it's fairly sick.
I don't know which way I want tohang it.
I think I kind of like this waywith the looks more like a
splash.
I don't actually know.
Um, if you're just listening tothis, come check out the YouTube
or Spotify video.
You can see this impeccable art.

(15:52):
I have to hang it somewhere onthe wall.
I have too much art anyways,just scattered around.
But that was, you know, I sawthat was on sale too.
It was like 50 bucks when itsays normally like 100.
Although I don't know if that'sthe case.
I feel like most of the Etsysales are kind of like, you
know, a little bit scammy wherethey'll have the prices at one
price and then they'll justrandomly double the price and

(16:13):
then say it's half off, youknow.
I guess the the typical, I mean,that's not not just Etsy.
I feel like there's lots ofplaces.
But that was the impulsepurchase of the week.
If that were the last impulsepurchase I've ever made, that
would honestly be fantastic formy finances.
Uh, because I got bills to pay.
We unfortunately don't got asmuch cheddar as I would uh like

(16:34):
at the moment.
We've got to get the money up.
We gotta we gotta chase a bank.
Maybe we gotta get that tattedon my face like Blueface.
That's actually an insanetransformation.
Blueface, have y'all seen him?
I feel like I saw somethingwhere he's talking about he I
don't know what he was in prisonfor, but he just got out of
prison for after like two yearsand broke got kind of kind of
swole, but he also got like uhsome I don't know if you have

(16:56):
the tattoo in prison or out ofprison or before, but a bunch of
logos on his face.
He kind of like uh got like Ifeel like he got like the MLB
logo, the Chase Bank logo.
It's interesting, it's a boldcall, but uh I think I saw one
guy that like had a similar sortof thing on his like arm, like
but like way worse.

(17:17):
Like he like he like I think itwas both of his arms, he had
like sleeves of the logos.
Um, like at least blue face,like his on his face, he's like,
you know, he got the chase logobecause he's chasing bank, duh.
But this guy had like everythingup his arms, but it was like
everything.
He's like Caesars, he'slike, 'cause I'm all that hot
and ready.
It was pretty funny that thisdude was like saying it,

(17:40):
expecting it that would like tobe tough, even it would be a
little bit more.
I'd fuck with it a little bitmore if he was like, you know,
embracing it ironically, like,hell yeah.
But this guy actually, I think,thought it was tough, which just
hurt to kind of watch.
But we'll see.
Where was I going with that?
I don't know, he got out ofprison.

(18:00):
I don't know what it was therefor.
I think I saw the 6ix9ines goingback back to prison, is he?
I don't know.
I really don't pay enoughattention anymore.
I used to feel like I used towatch all the the Traplar Ross
videos more in the past fewyears.
Don't have don't have the insidescoop anymore, but I don't know.
I think I saw he was doing somelike farewell stream or

(18:21):
something with Aiden Ross, and Iwas like, what why is he going
to farewell?
I thought he just I really don'tknow.
I don't keep up.
I'm just actually should shut upbecause I don't even I have
nowhere to go with this.
Um I'm just still sitting herewith my bum foot, waiting for
the day that it's all in onepiece.
I'm down to from 208 to 206.

(18:41):
Is that how many balls do wegot?
I think so.
I think it's 206 normally.
Unless you're a baby and you gotlots.
Um back to running and climbclimbing mountains and random
shit.
Hopefully, not falling off them.
Like to do some more hikes,maybe.
I mean, I feel like I was hopingto be doing lots by now, a long

(19:03):
time ago.
I don't know what the averagetime of YaleBone is.
I feel like this is definitelyon the long end, but you know,
2026, we're gonna be fuckingaround.
Those are some dumb shit.
Throwback to the time, likemaybe I guess I go to did this
like crazy hike in Hawaii um onthe island of Kauai.
That was a vibe, and I'm can't Idon't know if I want to do it

(19:26):
again, but maybe if I'm likestir crazy enough from not doing
stuff this past year, by thetime I plan to go back next
summer sometime, I'll have tothis hike again.
It's a pretty cool hike.
So it's on the island of Kauai,which is it's like the
northwest.
Well, not the most northwest.
It's maybe the most north, butnot the most yes, I don't know.

(19:52):
It's the oldest.
Okay, well, this is confusingbecause the way it works is like
there's like a a hot spot on theocean floor where it's like you
know, we're getting magma beingshot up under the ocean, but the
whole ocean floor is moving, andas it moves, and this is like
shooting up lava, it's likemaking different islands, so
they're like drifting northwest.
And so the oldest ones are likethe more north mostly mostly

(20:15):
west, a little bit north.
So that's Kawhi, that's like theoldest one and the most
northwest one.
Although, like Ni'ihao, I think,is a little bit west of it, but
I think it's somehow younger,which doesn't is maybe confusing
because like if it was likefurther west, that would make it
seem like it's older because ithad to like been moving for
longer to get that far over.
But maybe it was like some ofthere's like some weird once

(20:37):
upon a time, some extra branchand lava tunnel that shot up and
made that little island, butthat's all besides the point.
It's not really at all relevantto what we're talking about.
Um, so on, I guess I've beengoing to Hawaii with my family
since I've been little.
Because my parents just liked togo there, so we'd always go.
I think we normally went to Mauiand maybe like the big island a

(20:59):
few times.
Did go to Lenuty, uh the thepineapple island.
I think whoever I don't know howthat works now, because I think
Larry Ellison, is that his name?
I think the Oracle guy likebought the whole island.
I don't think there's much onthe island.
It was like a pineapple farm.
Maybe the pineapple farmersowned it, one of the big
pineapple companies.
But I went there once when I waslike maybe 10.

(21:21):
Actually, probably no, I think Iwas younger than that.
But I just remember like it waslike one like gas station, one
little cafe on this island, andit was like driving around on a
Jeep on like really ruggedroads.
I don't really remember muchabout that.
But we started going to Kauai.
Maybe I was like eight, I wantto say.

(21:42):
I don't know if that's right, itjust doesn't matter.
And then we just kind of keptgoing that from there, I guess,
because my family likes it alot.
Now I definitely really like it.
I've been to like Oahu once andit felt crazy.
I guess I grew up in a prettysmall town and like rural towns,
so it's kind of like the vibesI'm used to.
Uh and um Kuwait is like apretty like relatively

(22:05):
undeveloped island relative tothe other ones.
I think they have like laws likethat no building can be taller
than the tallest coconut tree.
So you don't see any of thegiant like hotels, sky rises,
which are kind of cool.
Uh it's just kind of big, biglaid back, small town, smaller
town vibes.
There's like one main road roadthrough the island.
It's like very chill, but verypretty.

(22:26):
It's like the Garden Island.
It's like one of the they gotlike one of the rainiest spots
on earth, like one of themountains up there.
And it's they had like a bunchof like filming for lots of
movies.
They're like Jurassic Park,Pirates of the Caribbean.
Is it Caribbean or Caribbean?
I feel like I think I sayPirates of the Caribbean.
Wait, do I say I don't knowwhich one I say?
I feel like I might say theCaribbean, but I say Pirates of

(22:46):
the Caribbean.
And it's vice versa.
And I don't know which one isone of those right?
I feel like there's lots ofthings.
I recently saw it was likesomething about like Waymo.
I've never been in one.
Are they all Jaguars?
Okay, well that I just gave itaway.
Uh I think, is it a Midwestpronunciation?

(23:07):
Jaguar?
Jaguar?
Jaguar?
I feel like it's hard for me tosay.
But it was like something wherethey had some old dudes hop in
one and they were like, oh, thecomments were all saying, like,
commenting about how these guyswere calling it a jaguar, like
jaguar.
And that's definitely how I sayit.
So, but I was like, why is thiscomment so uploaded or whatever?

(23:28):
Like, isn't that chat you sayit?
Jaguar.
But is it jaguar?
Jaguar.
I don't know.
How do you say it?
Please, someone help me out.
I don't know if that's becausegrowing up in the Midwest.
The other one, bag, um, like,you know, shopping bag, leather
bags, that's or how most otherpeople say it is bag.

(23:49):
I feel like a fucking goat whenI'm trying to say it, or like a
sheep, like bah, when I'm tryingto say bag.
I don't know if like my theMidwest, like the A's are
different to say, but bag is oneI always got shit for when I'm
like when you know on the whento school on the West Coast,
people are like, what are youtalking about?
Because like there's if I'msaying like yo, uh please I'm
begging you, or I'm begginggroceries, like I feel like I'm

(24:12):
saying that different, but maybeI'll have to like play this back
and like listen to it.
Uh listen to the recordingbecause maybe it sounds
different when that and it'sjust sounds I only or it sounds
the same and it only soundsdifferent in my head.
But I feel like sometimesthere's things like in other
languages when I've taken stuffor like Japanese, and they're
like there's like some differentintonations where they say it,

(24:32):
and I'm like, I can't tell whatthe difference is in what you
just said was.
So I don't know if it's likethat, but bag, I really have to
like fight to say that heart A.
Other things, oh the roof androots.
I feel like I have to really go,ooh, because normally I say like
roof and roots.
I don't know if that soundsweird to people, but people
always make fun of me saying I'mlike barking like a dog and

(24:54):
they're like roof, roof, roof.
But I don't know.
I ain't got nothing.
Okay, back to back to Hawaii.
I'm bouncing all over.
Yeah, I'll talk about that hikebecause it's a cool hike.
But so it's you know, reallyundeveloped.
Uh I mean it's not reallyundeveloped, I mean it's just
relatively doesn't have like asmuch like giant touristy things,

(25:14):
still plenty tourist stuff,don't get me wrong.
But it seems a little bit morenatural, like it feels way more
Hawaii to me than like when I'vebeen to other islands where
they're a little bit more busy.
But I think there's you know, Ithink that's for the the Zuck
himself.
He's got like a bunker they'rebuilding there.
I mean, I don't blame him.
I mean, I'm trying to, yo, can Icome visit, bro?
Please help hook me up.

(25:36):
I kind of want to check out theZuck's uh Kauai and Kauaian
ranch.
That'd be kind of cool.
People probably aren't hypedabout it.
But on the northwest of theisland is like this giant like
wilderness.
Like the main road mainly goesfrom like the west coast, like
kind of like through the middleisland up to like the north part
of it, and like the wholenorthwest corner is just like a

(25:56):
big like wilderness, state park,national.
I think just state park.
I don't know if it's national,but it's I don't know if I know
the name of the actual park.
I think it's got some weirdnames, but like the the coast is
like the na poly, which I guesslike I mean it's just Hawaiian
for the cliffs, like nah is likeNA.
It's just like the in Hawaiian,and Pali means cliffs, or maybe

(26:18):
plural.
I don't know.
I don't know if it means cliffor cliffs.
I don't actually know Hawaiian.
That'd be cool to learnHawaiian.
I would like to know that, but Idon't know that many Hawaiian
words other than like Aloha,Mahalo, Hono, turtle.
What else?
I guess I know a few others, butnot nothing like not actually

(26:38):
speaking it.
How many people actually speakit?
That'd be I don't know.
It would be cool to know andunderstand more of that.
But anyways, I'm getting reallyand nothing actually abnormal is
going on, but they have thislike I guess like hike that goes
there.
There's some like it's true,they're like really cool
beaches, like it's like somebeautiful cliffs.
That's where they film a lot ofthose movies that I've talked

(26:59):
about, like the Pirates of theCaribbean beaches, like they're
running on some of these likebeaches that they're just like
like really isolated andbeautiful and pristine with some
of these mountains in thebackground.
I mean, that's sort of like alot of stuff, like when they're
flying into Jurassic Park andthe the views of the coast of
the island.
I think that is this coastlinebecause it's pretty awesome.
Especially in like summer whenit's like really green and

(27:19):
hilly.
It's not a little bit more brownin the fall and winter.
It's not or wait, I said thatbackwards.
Uh it's really pretty and greenin the like winter or like
spring, but like late summer andfall, it can be a little bit
browner because it's a littlebit drier, but it's still pretty
awesome.
Like the cliffs are cool.
I think it's like might be likeone of like the fastest eroding
places on earth that justbecause like this like volcanic

(27:43):
rock just like really erodesreally quickly.
Um, like some people like wantto climb it, and it's like or
like people ask about it, butlike the people there are like,
oh yeah, only if you want todie.
And now that I've been there andlike hiked it, it's actually
terrifying.
Like, there's one time I waslike walking on this cliff and
I'm like trying to like hug itand like grab like a boulder
that thought was like stable,and I like crushed it and it

(28:04):
just like disintegrated in myhand.
It felt like I was like somesuper villain in a movie when
you just like grab likesomething, like a big boulder
and just like crumble it or liketurns to ashes.
Like I hit it with like theThanos snap and it just like
faded away.
And it was like a big, likebigger than my hand.
I grabbed it and just liketurned into dust.
And I'm like, that felt very uhnot comfort like when I'm on
this cliff trying to uh you knowmake it across and uh you know

(28:26):
fall in the ocean and die.
But um it's super cool, supercool to walk along.
I mean, I've like done stufflike kayaking across it, and
they should have these like Imean, some like more bigger boat
cruises along this coastline tosee it and sunset cruises.
I have not these like little,this probably the most fun thing
to do is these little like uh Iguess they call them like the

(28:48):
zodiac rafts, or it's kind oflike the the inflatable boat
with the motor in the back andthey're you know leaning back,
steering it.
I guess they're normally they'renormally standing in the middle,
they're a little bit bigger, orthat you fly across that.
And you you get to kind of flythrough it and see all of it.
It's a little bit rougher.
Took my mom once, um, and shefound out the hard way that
she's like very seasick.

(29:09):
She we made it like uh maybewell as long as you're when
you're moving there and you'rejust like whipping on the ocean,
she's fine.
But I think once we like stoppedand you started getting a little
bit wavier as you kind of werelike sliding with the ocean, not
fighting it as hard.
Even though it was like abeautiful day in the perfect
weather for it, she was wrecked,she was like gagging in the
corner and out of commission.

(29:32):
It was, I think it was a rough,rough rest of the day for her.
I felt pretty bad, although itwas it was pretty entertaining.
But they're like, Oh, do youwant to go sit back with her?
I'm like, hell no, you can puther back there and she'll be
fine.
Just, you know, uh, I mean, callme if you need anything, but I
don't really want to be catchingher vomit.
But it was it was a good time.
Uh I think she took her likeweeks to recover.

(29:54):
She was like, we got back toland finally, and she was just
like laying on the dock for aminute, like.
Kissing the ground.
It's it's pretty entertaining.
But I think she got like was hadlike seasickness for like weeks
after it.
So I don't know if she got somelike problem with the crystals
in your ears or whatever, likethe little rocks that you know
keep things from I guess well,you have these like little

(30:16):
crystals in your ears that likemove around in some tubes that
you kind of like help youbalance and get some sense of
where you are and things likethat.
And I think if you got problemswith those, you can get all like
nauseous and dizzy and things.
So I don't know.
But there's this hike that issuper pretty, but it may be kind
of dangerous because there areyou're mostly just hiking for

(30:38):
like 20 miles on the cliff sideof this, you know, really
eroding basically oceansidecliff pathway.
I don't even know how it'smaintained, but I decided I want
to do it um a few years ago.
Yeah.
It's called the Colalao Trail,it's pretty sick, pretty sick.

(30:59):
Uh and it's like something whereyou have to do, like, apply,
it's maybe not six months, maybelike three months out.
It's like you gotta like applyonline for permits and it sells
it like instantly.
But I decided to do it, and thenuh actually was like a few days
before I was doing it.
I was doing this like raft ridewith my mom, and then we got to
some point where it's like thenarrowest part of it, and it

(31:19):
looks like I don't even know.
These people like on thismountain, this like cliff face
look like little mountainghosts.
Like, you can't even I mean, Ifeel like the trail is like a
foot wide at that point, andit's just like this, and they
like drop off.
It's pretty spooky.
Um, and then I see in that fromthe water, I'm like, I was maybe
having some technology.
I'm like, oh boy.
Uh maybe me, I don't know.

(31:40):
I mean, I was full, I was stillcommitted to sending it, but I
was made me a little nervous andtell these people like I don't
even know what they're walkingon.
It looks like they're just likeglitching on the side of the
mountain.
And I don't know how they're notfalling to their death in the
ocean.
Um and I was hoping mom gaggingin the back of the road didn't
see that because I felt like shewould have freaked out.
I think she did see it, but Ithink she was just so fucked up

(32:01):
from being seasick that shedidn't panic enough because she
definitely has a tendency to belike, oh hell no, you're not
going.
What the hell?
Like, I feel like she would havebeen fully with it and looking
at it.
Because even I was looking atit, I was like, what the hell is
that?
Uh but we did it, we survived.
But I was like, I ended up liketalking to like one of the crew,
this little brat we're on, andthey mentioned things like

(32:23):
having like ropes to go on it,mainly for like these stream
crossings.
Because I guess sometimes onthese like mountain streams,
like there's like or like it'snot really in the mountains at
this point, it's kind of likejust on the close along the
coast.
But if it like downpours in themountains, like these streams
can like rush and becomeimpassable.
Like, I feel like I've seen someheadlines where they're like
evacu had to like evacuateeveryone on the trail.

(32:44):
I think they only let like 60people per day on it, but it's
like evacuated.
Like I see headlines where likesix people evacuated.
I'm like, that was everyone onthe trail that day.
How the hell?
But I guess it's because likesometimes like storms and the
like the the streams that yougotta cross to get back to the
parking lot just are like toodangerous.
Like, I mean, I guess it's likereally rough and like you can't
cross it, it's like you there'syou definitely shouldn't because

(33:06):
it'll just get like not so muchlike that you'll like Amelia
will drown, but it's just likeyou're just gonna get swept and
like slam into a rock and thenit's gonna be game over from
there, even though it's like alittle stream, it's just so
rough and rocky, where if itactually's got a lot going
through it, you're you ain'tgonna cross it unless maybe like
rope swing tarzan.
That's maybe an option.

(33:26):
I feel like you could just builda bridge.
I feel like that would be maybelike an easy solution.
Although I don't think ithappens that much.
And I think that's gotta beeasier than maintaining these
cliffside trails because Iactually have no idea how they
like last because they're likepretty narrow and it's just like
loose soil and gravel.
It was actually terri.
I mean, it wasn't it was I don'tknow, terrifying isn't the right

(33:47):
word, but it was like verydraining, mostly mentally doing
this hike because like it's justloose stuff the whole time, and
you're like worried.
Like, I feel like anytime I likewas not super like tiptoe
walking, I start to slide, andthere's nothing stopping you
from the ocean.
You just see this big, like thislittle like slightly flatter
part, it's like a steep hill,slightly flatter, and then like

(34:08):
steep hill again after that, andlike you're just trying to stand
that flat part and shuffle andnot slide too far down it or off
it.
It's a little bit scary.
Uh I'm jumping ahead, but yeah,they talked about getting ropes,
and I was like, is this am Imaybe in a little bit over my
head?
I mean, because I definitely doa lot of these like crazy hikes

(34:29):
that they always like recommend,like, or there's normally like
backpacking routes, but I kindof just like to do it in a day
and get it done with.
I think this one could be morefun though, as like a
backpacking thing, because likethis really cool beach at the
end where like you could campfor a day, maybe two, although I
feel like I might get boredafter a few days or like two.
I don't know.
I just like to you know run andgun, run through this cliffs and

(34:50):
then get back home, eat a bunch,and sleep in bed.
But anyways, I did end upgetting the rope.
I'm like, okay, I'll have it.
I got lots of stuff.
I also bought some like prior tocoming, some like big like metal
cleats that I got to have onhand.
That basically came because Ihad previously um almost fallen

(35:11):
off an icy mountain.
That was you know, that's astory for another day.
And I think people hadpreviously died earlier that
year, same sort of thing.
I'm like, I was dumb of me.
I should have been moreprepared.
So I'm I've slowly learned addedpieces to my thing, to my my
gear that I'm you know luggingaround.
So I brought these like big kindof like not full crampons, I

(35:34):
think as you call them, but likemaybe mini crampons for like if
it gets wet and muddy.
I feel like I've seen videos ofthis trail in a storm or like
rain, and it's like there's noway I'm not doing that.
That's I don't that's just dumb.
But so I had those, got thisrope, and then I think my
staples for most of my hikes arewell, it's normally the cucumber

(35:55):
lime Gatorade, but probably oneof my favorite drinks of all
time is guava juice, and Ibought a bunch of it in Hawaii
when I was there because I getsome good stuff, good fresh
stuff.
And that was basically what Ipacked for this big it's like uh
I think it's like 12 miles oneway, so like 20 forest round

(36:16):
trip.
But I did also add on all theselike a few side uh side pack
side what the word side questpaths.
That's just what I was trying tosay.
Go ahead and spit it out.
But yeah, we did that raft ride.
My mom was just recovering fromthat, but I decided to get my
stuff together to get ready tohead out in a few days because

(36:38):
that was when the hike was,because then it was gonna be all
day endeavor.
Um and I kind of wanted to getan early start, especially
because it's kind of used on thecliff, so it's hot and you're
kind of in the sun, and I waslike, kind of want to minimize
that time.
And we were it's like this thetrail is like on like the center
north part of the island, andwe're just kind of staying in
the bottom south.
And I think I wanted to start atlike 5 a.m.

(37:00):
So I'm pretty sure it was likemaybe like an hour and an hour
and a half drive.
I don't think it was quite twohours, but I feel like we left
at like 3, 3:30 a.m.
Shout out to my mom for you knowgetting up early to drive me
there and uh drop me off.
I think she would drive backdown to the hotel, uh the resort
we were staying at afterwards toget some sleep.
But we I packed up um oh, what Iwas doing with my gate, my guava

(37:24):
juice is I decided to well, Iput some in the fridge, you
know, to have cold.
And then I had this like uhbladder, like it's not a candle
bag, but some other like thing.
It's like just like a bigthree-liter bladder that I put
in my backpack and have like astraw so I can be slurping out
of that.
But the morning of when I wastrying to get my final stuff
together to get ready to hikeall day, I started dumping in my

(37:47):
lava juice into there and filledit up, sealed it, and I was
gonna start putting in my bag,and I realized it started
squirting, and I was like, ohno, what the hell is going on?
And I realized that somehow mybladder had unfortunately sprung
a leak, and I was like, wow,this is very unfortunate.
We do not have any liquid.
Okay, well, we'll have liquid,but we don't have to use a
bladder, which is super nice tojust be able to like slurp out

(38:09):
of your backpack without havingto like get a bottle or anything
the whole time.
So that was a bummer, but I didluckily like just buy a shit ton
of juice and stuff, like morethan I need, and I was probably
just gonna have them bring someof it when they picked me up at
the end of the day.
But a lot of it I froze.
I had just like several litersof just frozen guava juice.

(38:30):
So I essentially ended upfilling my backpack with blocks
of frozen guava juice, justblocks of ice and water bottles.
And had that, kind of kept myback cool, I guess.
But I I don't think I actuallyhad anything liquid when I
started the hike because we gotthere at 5 30 and started off.
I mean, you know, I probablyactually I don't even know if I
had breakfast.

(38:50):
I probably had some trail mix orsomething.
I don't I don't really like toeat though.
I'm kind of yeah, I mean, I justdrink a bunch of sugary liquids
mainly because I know I shouldhave something, but I never want
to eat.
I mean, I'd just, you know, hikea hundred miles on a white
monster and call it a day if Iwere up to me.
But it's like probably, youknow, out of obligation to for

(39:12):
everyone else.
So I mean take a little morecare of myself.
I'll bring some you know sugarwater.
So yeah, that's my move.
But not if it was drinkable whenI started off, it was all
frozen.
But I was like, it's maybe abolt call, but it was just gonna
hit extra hard when it's extracold later and I'm hiking.
But started off, started off ashike at like 5 a.m.
as dark as hell.

(39:32):
But I had this really giantflashlight that I bought.
I think it's called like the FatDaddy, it's got a pretty awesome
name, something like that.
I don't know.
But it's basically hikingthrough the jungle the first few
miles, and there's like I thinkthere's lots of frogs hopping
around.
So they have some really bigbullfrogs in kawaii
specifically, and like they'rejust like constantly hopping on
the leaves on the side of me,and like I couldn't quite see

(39:54):
them, but I could hear all thislike life, and it's kind of
spooky just walking through adark jungle here and all this
like these critters hoppingaround you.
Luckily, Hawaii at least doesn'thave too many like bugs and
stuff.
And even I don't even think theyhave snakes, so it's like kind
of a safer-feeling jungle.
It's not quite as eerie, youknow, there's not that many
things out there.
I mean, they have like chickensall over because the hurricane

(40:14):
Aniki sometime, maybe I don'tknow, some maybe the 60s.
I feel like it might be morerecent than that.
Destroyed all like a bunch ofchicken coops, and there's like
no natural predators, other thannow, maybe like house cats that
are like stray cats are aproblem that are maybe taking
them out a little bit.
But the chickens are just kindof run rampant there.
But started off this hike thefirst few months just kind of in

(40:36):
the jungle, hearing all thesethings hopping around you.
Uh, up to like some first beach,that was kind of cool, but it's
just me basically.
I mean, I started before anyonewas there.
I mean, I had a permit, butactually no one ever checked my
permit because I think I gotthere so early that it was like
before the rangers were evenlike doing checks of stuff.
So no one ever actually checkedmy stuff at this point, like any

(40:56):
point through the day.
I don't really know where theydo that.
I think I've known people thathave done it and like they
definitely got their stuffchecked.
So I had it all with me.
I was legit.
I had the documentation to go,but I was just too quick, too
early.
Started off.
Um, I really had no idea howlong it was gonna take me to do
this hike.
I knew it was about 12 miles.
And I mean, I just kind of wantto, you know, grind and go, get

(41:19):
through, get to this end, thethe final Koalao Beach.
It's super pretty.
But so I just kind of sent itoff.
Um, but the first, I think it'slike I don't know, I feel like
the whole hike, at least mayberound trip, is maybe like 7,000
feet of elevation gain.
Even though you start at sealevel, and at a sea level, you
just really go up and down thesecliffs as you go along them in
like tons of elevation.

(41:39):
And I feel like you go up anddown like a thousand feet twice
in the first like three miles tothis first beach.
So I did that, and I thinkthat's like maybe what the my
watch thing was like suspectingto be the slowest part because
it's probably the most likephysically demanding.
But honestly, like for me, likeI had enough like endurance
where like that part is like Ican fly through it, and it's not
that bad for me, and it's kindof more fun, where it's like it
was actually like a solid trail,maybe a little bit rocky, but

(42:02):
like solid ground and like juststeep, but like really easy to
you know, just kind of keepcruising through that.
And then my watch tell me, like,oh, you're gonna make it here in
like three hours.
Does that sound right?
Maybe before, yeah, somewherelike that, maybe like three and
a half, four.
I don't really know, somethinglike way quicker than I
expected.
I really don't know.
I mean, I feel like Ultros isalso not super accurate, even on

(42:24):
distances over like long ones,like you can easily be a mile or
two off, which is like can likethrow off the amount of time
you'd be hiking about like afair amount, like by a whole
half hour or an hour someplaces.
I mean, I think I've had somereal slow, steep miles on things
that were kind of crazy.
But I was you know poweringthrough, and I mean I just kept

(42:44):
grinding, but I did have in theback of my mind that I knew I
think I knew at mile seven I wasgonna hit this this narrow,
super sketch looking thing fromthe outside.
It's called crawler's ledge.
I don't think I mentioned thatbefore because people want to
crawl on it, I guess.
I think that's why the namecalls it that.
But I feel like that makesalmost less sense to me.
I feel like I feel like I feelless stable almost like crawling

(43:06):
on it when it's so narrow.
But I think that's why theycalled that.
But I was definitely like afterseeing it from the water and how
sketchy it looked, I kind of waslike a little bit nervous and it
was like checking my watch.
I'm like, oh, we're one milecloser to that fucking ledge.
And I was definitely a littlebit nervous, especially because
after maybe about like four orfive miles, like you kind of get
through kind of the main, likejungly up and down to like more

(43:29):
exposed, just on this likecliffside path, and where it's
just like this loose gravel,like I was saying, and you can
like slip pretty easily ifyou're not walking carefully.
And I was kind of prettystressed walking on that, like
because I was like, I can'trelax, I gotta constantly be
like stepping carefully, and Ilike I get to a part maybe like
more a little inland, less closeto a cliff, but in the jungle,

(43:51):
and I kind of like relax, walk alittle bit more carefree, not
even like carefree, but justlike not like super carefully.
And I started slipping, I'mlike, I was like, what the fuck?
I'm like, I cannot like chillout and walk like at all without
like very carefully if I don'twant to like die, which kind of
stressed me out a little bit,and then I was like, No, that
was coming up.
But honestly, when I or actuallyright before this, like you have

(44:14):
to go on this really loose stuffdown this like steepish trail to
that ledge, and that washonestly one of the more scary
parts to me.
And I was like, Oh gosh, we'regoing down this, and then you
like worry about running intopeople because it's like there
are people coming back from thetrail in there, and so you gotta
worry about that.
It's kind of a headache, likeit's barely, it's hardly wide
enough for one person.
But actually getting to thatcrawler's ledge, that part was

(44:36):
actually a relief because it waslike pretty like rocky material,
and I guess that's the onlyreason it stays.
Like, if you were the other liketype of loose rock, it would be
like gone within like a week.
I don't know how the trail ismaintained on other parts.
I mean, it barely is, but I feellike just a good rain would wash
it away, honestly, because it'sso like shallow and like loose
stuff.

(44:56):
But that part was actuallypretty chilled, like the the
crawl out of the ledge that waslike the most hyped up part, and
like maybe because it's likehigh up and like really narrow,
but like I felt relieved when Iwas stepping on that stuff
because it was like finally likesolid rock that I wasn't sliding
around on as much.
It's like you kind of gotta hugthe wall a little bit more.
But I'm like, this is great,give me 10 more miles of this.
Because after that, actually wasprobably the worst part where

(45:18):
you have like these big windystuff of like just sort of like
just open cliffs, but likeyou're kind of walking on like a
constant angle and it's loosegravel, and I'm like trying to
like grab hunt vines on thewall, but it's just like just
giant cliffs like dirt on theseparts, and some of it curved
down and so loose, and I waslike, I was kind of it was a
little bit sketchy.

(45:39):
There are some parts where youkind of come down a hill while
you're doing that, and I waslike, that's too steep, or I
don't trust that my shoes arenot gonna start sliding on this
loose gravel, so I legit justlike sat on the ground and just
like scooted on my ass down thislittle like hill and turn.
I'm like, I'm not taking achance, I'm just gonna get this
brown butt.
But I just kept grinding, keptgoing, and you know, across a

(46:00):
few streams.
I mean, I didn't really pass somany people till the first few
miles until I got later inthere.
Then I came across the peoplethat were like camping at the
campgrounds and whatnot.
So on, but I think I made it tothe final beach at about like
five and a half hours, I wouldsay, and I didn't stop really.
No, I didn't stop at all thattime.
It was like five and a halfhours solid.

(46:21):
I think close to the end of it,maybe like a half mile from the
thick beach.
It's like I finally got to likeyou're back at sea level and
kind of walk through the jungleup to this beach clearing.
Um, but there's like some lessstream crossing I did, and some
like old lady, she was like, Oh,you gotta try some of my
Jamaican passion fruit that Ijust picked.
And I was like a little bitsussed, but I was like pretty

(46:43):
thirsty at this point becauseI've been you know hiking
through the jungle and in thesun for five and a half hours
and like 12-ish, 13-ish miles.
And I was definitely, I mean,and also I lost elevation, so I
was I mean, I wasn't gassed, butI was like in need of some you
know sustenance.
So it was like, fuck it, I'lltry this these patched fruit.
And they were definitely, Imean, I'd have to maybe try them

(47:05):
again, like in less uh direconditions, but them shit really
hit.
I will say they were they werepretty fire.
Uh not as much as what will hitnext, but I definitely ate this
like little pile of you knowpassion fruit or lily koi.
I think that's the same thing.
I think it's just like a I don'tknow if liliquoi is a Hawaiian
word for it.
Uh but then finally made it tothe beach and then cracked open

(47:26):
my backpack full of icy guava.
And by this time it wasimpeccable timing because you
know being out in the the warmthand the heat of my back, the one
closest to my back finallyturned to a perfect slushy
consistency of guava juice, andjust chugging that definitely
gave myself a horrible brainfreeze, not gonna lie.
But still, it was definitelyorgasmic drinking that guava

(47:49):
juice after all that hiking andnot having anything, any liquid
or whatnot.
I think I did bring a filterbottle where I could filter
string, but I didn't really wantto do that.
I still I kind of want to filtermy I have a filter bottle that I
have and had for years, but I'veactually just never used it.
I just have it in case.
I don't really not super keen onyou know drinking stream water,
but I kind of wanted to justhave done it once.

(48:11):
But not today, not that or notthat day.
Choked that guava juice and satinto these like shaded area
chilling and hung out for alittle bit and then I decided to
go check out this big beautifulbeach that I hiked all day to go
get to.
And I kind of stepped out, Imean I like threw off my
backpack and stuff.

(48:32):
I I can't remember.
I don't think I hiked in aswimsuit, but I think I just
planned to swim in my hikingshorts that I wore.
But it doesn't matter.
I like decided I put all mystuff other than like I think I
have probably phone with me in abag and whatever, maybe some
juice, and decided to like walk.
It's a pretty deep beach, kindof like some of like the Cali

(48:52):
beaches, like the Santa Monica,where it's like a lot of sand
before the water, surprisingly.
But I think it depends on thetime of year because sometimes
it gets rough in the winter andlike there's not much beach
actually available.
But I step out into the sunnybeach, and for whatever reason,
this sand is like a milliondegrees.
I don't know how this stuff'sactually not glass.
Like I started taking a fewsteps, and all of a sudden my
feet are burning, so I'm like,what the fuck is this?

(49:15):
I just start like sprintingtowards the the ocean because my
feet are just burning.
And I was like kind of goingtowards a couple, and like I'm
just like sprinting, like myfeet on fire, and I'm like, give
me to the water.
Like, I feel like I don't evenknow.
I feel like some is that aSpongebob thing where now I
don't have a Spongebob, but I'mjust like running my feet

(49:36):
burning.
I'm like trying to like do highknees, hot potato with the
ground, touch it as little aspossible.
Like the floor was actually lavaon my bare feet, right?
And that we're hiking all day,and like I felt like they were
getting a blister.
I was just like, uh uh uh it'slike uh I don't know if you ever
like walked on hot pavement atlike around a pool sometimes.
If it's got dark pavement andlike you're walking barefoot
between the pool and burn yourfeet that way, it was like that,

(49:57):
but I was just like trapped inthis giant beach.
Like I got in too deep before Irealized how hot this hand was,
and I was like, oh no, and Ijust had to like keep running.
But I was going across thisbeach, and I kind of like, I
mean, it wasn't payingattention, I was just like
focused on water.
That was my only thing, notburning my feet anymore.
And I really just was like apair of people in the distance.
I was kind of get closer andlike ran up into this, like on

(50:18):
this pair of people, and Itotally realized, didn't realize
till I got like right there.
And but I was I was my eyes wereon the prize, I was ready to get
my feet in the water, cool themoff, like dipping them damn,
like you know, Forge putting theblacksmith putting the the
metals and the the water,cooling them off his molden hot
sword, that's what I was liketrying to do with my feet.
Uh and I finally got there and Ilook over and I realize this

(50:39):
couple's a butt ass naked,skinny dipping on the beach,
which honestly respect.
I mean I get it there, althoughthis is like a pretty popular.
I mean, relatively to like anyother spot on the island, not at
all popular because there's nothardly any people that can get
there, but this is like the mainpart of the hike, and I don't
know if they didn't want methere.
Like, I feel like they they likeshrieked and then ran back naked

(50:59):
to the trees where I mean itwasn't where the stealth was, so
I don't really know what thefreaked out, but I didn't care.
I was like, I I needed to put myfeet in the ocean, but also the
ocean there is a little bitspooky, like the waves, the
current or whatever, like it'sgot like you know when you kind
of like it pulls you out alittle bit.

(51:19):
Like when I got in, I was onlyknee high in the water.
Like I just got in like finally,then I started feeling like this
thing is like really like it'slike really sucking me out.
This like tide is like likelow-key, sucking me like a crack
or outer rock right now.
And it's like I do not want togo higher than this in my like
higher than like knee depth,because I feel like it's gonna
suck me out, like the whateverrip tides.

(51:40):
Because I'm kind of curious,I'll admit, there's like another
beach, like maybe like a miledown where you could like
sometimes, sometimes you couldwalk there, but normally it's
like a swim, an open ocean swim,which is like oh sounds kind of
fun.
But after like feeling that I'mlike, these waves are a little
bit big, and this is kind oflike a strong current.
I was like, I should probablynot, you know, do my first open
ocean swim solo in the middle ofthis wilderness, uh, with yeah,

(52:04):
anything or anyone to likesupervise me.
So I did I did call it there.
One of the few rare responsibledecisions I make, but I do make
them, you know, for my bestinterest, you know, keep the
sweat going.
But uh did kind of explore therest of the beach, staying close
to the water where I couldoccasionally dip my feet in or
where the sand was wetter andcooler.

(52:24):
Um checked it out, walkedthrough some caves, found
another couple in a cave.
I think they were just having apicnic though.
I was like walked in, I'm like,did I just walk in on some other
shit?
I didn't I was a little bitleery of as I walked around in
this like sea cave where it'skind of like it's pretty cool.
It's like a big like cliff, andlike I think the water is
sometimes like carve it out,maybe in the winter when it's
higher, but at this time of yearit's like dry in there, so it's

(52:46):
kind of cool.
Then hung out, chugged some workguava juice flushy.
Uh took a little shower on thislike waterfall that they have at
the end of it.
It's like a freshwater waterfallwhere you can like shower off
the sun.
This I mean not the sun, thisthe sand and the salt water.
It felt pretty, pretty amazing.
And then I just started bookingit back.

(53:07):
Although on the way back, like Inoticed there's like several
like trails for waterfalls.
I was kind of curious to checkout.
I think I did there's maybe liketwo or three of them, and I
think I did all but one, mainlybecause I was like checking the
time of seeing how long it wastaking me.
I thought for sure I was gonnabe able to have to do time to do
all of them and more uh with thepace I was going at first the

(53:28):
first few miles, but then when Ihit like the the really sketchy
like sand, then I like slowedway down and my pace like
tanked, but I was like, I'm notgoing faster on this stuff.
Like, if I go any faster, I'mdefinitely that's gonna be an
RIP.
I'm going, I'm not going youknow, zero to sixty ever again.
I'm going zero to twenty-threeor whatever the hell it was.
I don't know.

(53:49):
Something like that.
But made it well, so I think thefirst one of the waterfalls, it
was like it said it was likeonly a mile, but I was like
hiking in this jungle.
I guess it's like it's a littlebit more less close to like the
coastline and the water.
You kind of like hike more intothe jungle to get this
waterfall.
That's I guess the furthest onthe trail, but the first one I

(54:11):
came across on the way back, uhI don't really know the name of
it, but I was like kind ofhiking, kind of trying to follow
what I think is a trail,although it's a little bit
loose, and then all of a suddenmy like GPS just totally blonks
out, it's like teleporting meacross the all over, and I'm
like seeing my trail on there.
I'm like, this thing is cooked,and I was like, Well, I'm just
gonna keep walking on what Ithink is a path, and as well, if

(54:32):
I lose any more confidence thatit's a path, I'm just gonna turn
back.
But kept going.
I did just see some people, andI eventually got to this
waterfall, and it did make sensewhy my GPS was not working at
all because I realized I was inthe bottom of like this like
300-foot canyon, like thesecliffs are like totally like
straight up.
Like, I try to take videos ofit, but it doesn't even do

(54:52):
justice, so it's pretty sick.
Like, you're just like thebottom of it, and it's just like
300 feet vertical walls allaround you in a waterfall just
straight down.
It was it's pretty awesome,pretty spectacular, I will say.
And like, I see that's why Ihave actually like no GPS
signal.
I was like, I my GPS is buggingout, and I was like, managed to,
you know, hang on to what Icould find of a trail.

(55:13):
Definitely had some challengingsituations like that where
there's like the trail isovergrown, and I'm like, I think
this is logically a trail, butthere's definitely many
deceiving things, so it's notthat easy, and it's very easy to
mess up.
But I was glad I didn't make itmake any mistakes, especially
like when you're in jungle,everything looks the same.
It's a little bit tricky, but wemade it.

(55:33):
And then I think there wasanother one that I did.
I think was there another one?
I kind of I think so.
I think there's one more, andthen there's one I didn't do at
the end because I had thewhatever the agreed upon time to
meet my parents, and I knew if Iwas late for that, they'd
totally panic.
I mean, I mean, I think theywould know they shouldn't panic,
but I didn't know that would, soI was like trying to minimize
that.

(55:54):
Although I think they still gotthere a few hours early just
because that's how they are.
Um, but then you know, just mademy way back, chugging my guava
juice along the way as it becamefrom ice to slushy to liquid,
and beat them, or well, I guessthey were there and I didn't
even realize it, but I was kindof like in the park still, and I
decided to sit at one of thesebeaches for a while, swim around

(56:16):
there, kick off my shoesfinally.
That well, I guess I kicked themoff once before, but after the
last part.
My feet were actually prettysore because on this last way
back, for whatever reason, Ithink I was I don't know if it's
from like cross-country running,if I just got like this really
lazy stride where I feel like Iwhen I'm hiking or sometimes
even running, like I lift up myfeet as little as possible when

(56:36):
I'm kind of just going for likelong distance, and I was doing
that, but I kept kicking theselike rocks that are like
embedded in the trail.
Like I did it several timesreally hard on my big toe, and
it like was pretty sore.
So I was like, I want to takeoff shoes and just let it you
know breathe in the water andjust my whole self swam around
and then you know saw my parentswho were relieved that I didn't

(56:56):
fall off a damn cliff oranything, or yeah, getting eaten
by anything, get knocked off bya pig.
Some of the zones were like theysay it's like you weren't in
wild pig territory or like weirdgates.
I feel I forget what they say,but that was whatever.
I did it, I made it through thetrail, finished the Colola
trail, and then we ended up, youknow, finding some restaurant in
the town nearby.

(57:19):
And I think that was probablyone of the best meals I'd ever
had.
But also again, it was probablypart of my condition because I
had legit not eaten anything allday, just chugged guava juice,
which you know probably hadenough calories where I was like
somewhat sustained.
I mean, I definitely would be inan effort, but like still, like
I mean it probably had I don'tactually know how big these

(57:44):
bottles were.
Because also my collarbones werebruised by the end of the day
from the weight of this backpackjust full of like just blocks of
ice.
I don't I think it were thesewere two-liter things.
I think I legit had six litersof guava juice that I drank.
And they were just in mybackpack.
My collarbones were sore ashell, and they were like purple

(58:06):
for like the next like week ortwo, just from the weight of it,
especially because I did thefirst whole half of the high
with all that weight.
Like how much like six liters?
I feel like it's more than that.
I don't know.
I don't know, actually no, it'slike a gallon and a half.
I feel like I did the math atone point and it was like 30
pounds.
So maybe back calculate how muchliquid it is from that.

(58:31):
I want to say it's like eightgallons of eight pounds per
gallon.
So it's a f no, I feel like 30pounds, maybe 20 pounds.
I feel like maybe that might bemore accurate.
20 pounds?
So is that like two gallons,which is like eight liters?
I don't know.
It was a lot of guava juice.
Like an excessive amount.

(58:52):
But I got some, anyways, itdoesn't matter.
We got to this restaurant, wegot some sushi.
My parents never had sushibefore, they're real Midwestern,
and they're like I was kind oflike resistant to it, but I'm
well we didn't try like superduper normal sushi.
I got like some like the realAmerican sushi with like all the
fix-ins.
I think I got them one where itwas like maybe even like fried
salmon in it with covered insauce and stuff.

(59:13):
I mean, also honestly, also Ilove that kind, so I wasn't mad
about it.
And then I got like this plateof like rice and teriyaki tuna,
I think.
Yeah, but they brought it.
I think they brought my platefirst, and I like scarfed that
shit down like the hat.
And they came back with myparents' food, and my plate was
already gone.

(59:34):
They're like, uh, are you okay?
Do you want more?
And I was like, Yes.
I don't think like I thinkthey're kind of like kidding
when they were asking that, butthey also couldn't believe how
fast that food was gone.
And then I was like, Yes, andthey're like, Oh shit, he's not
kidding.
And I'm like, please.
And then they did that, and likemy parents had finished their
meals by the time they broughtme another whatever plate of
food.
I scarfed that down again too ina minute, and then they they

(59:57):
came back to check on thatagain, and it was like already
gone.
And then dessert.
We got some like brownie sundae.
That was also amazing.
Delectable.
Can't speak nothing but thehighest price for that in that
moment.
With some sun, not Sunday, withsome ice cream.
Gobbled that up and then, youknow, got home, showered, and
clonked out for like 12 hours.

(01:00:19):
Because I think it was like atotal of like 27 miles of hiking
and like yeah, 7,000 feet.
Slept real good.
Although I forgot I scheduled asurfing lesson for the next
morning.
So I think I scheduled it forthe like afternoon.
Well, I think I still sleptplenty, slept a good amount.
Then went to the surfing lesson.
I had only gone like once, like10 years prior when I was a kid.

(01:00:42):
And it was pretty fun.
It always looked fun.
I always wanted to do it.
It was very fun.
Although several moreunfortunate things happened.
Like I was saying, my toe wasobliterated from kicking rocks.
Um, so that was like a littlebit unfortunate.
Um, also this surfing.
Uh the guy was like, Do you wantme like whatever shirts?

(01:01:02):
And I'm like, no, that's lame.
I don't know where this shirtand I'm on the surfboard.
Um, didn't think nothing of it,but by the end of it, or like
actually nothing, nothing hit metill later in the day, to be
completely fair.
I did it.
The surfing was fun.
I the only bad thing I get inthe moment was like, I think I
went out there with gotcontacts, and like, but by the
time I was done, I was like,realized like I can't see shit.

(01:01:24):
I must have like lost mycontacts.
I must like wash out of my eyewhen I ate shit off the board a
few times.
But the things that really hitme later in the day were not
wearing a shirt.
I think I got like a whole rashall up my chest, and that shirt
was like pretty sore and tender.
It's like a weird like scab onit.
That kind of hurt.
The other thing is like becauseit was like sort of early at

(01:01:45):
later, I think it was like maybe10 or 11 o'clock.
It's not super early, but like Iwas trying to sleep in as much
as possible after hiking and allthat yesterday.
So I just quickly put on my suitand like ran down to like the
the because like it was like anocean front resort, and there's
like a surfing shop rental hotwhere they had that at to pull
up there.
So I didn't even put onsunscreen, but like I wasn't
that concerned about it becauselike once I do a little bit, I

(01:02:08):
mean you still should wear yoursunscreen kids, you know, it's
good for everything, yourhealth, you know, stay young,
don't get skin cancer.
But I feel like burn-wise, I'musually pretty resistant if I've
had some sun and already beenthere for a week at that point,
been there all day.
But what I didn't consider islike when you're on the
surfboard, you're on your belly,and the backs to your legs are
the things that are up, andthose probably don't get nearly

(01:02:28):
as much sun as the rest of mybody.
So I burnt the shit out of likeparticularly like the your like
knee pit, like this part uh ofthere, that part got like crisp,
even like the back of my likethighs and my calves were like
pretty roasted and sore.
So those were sore, my chest wassore, and I fell off the
surfboard at one point, and it'skind of a rocky area, and I like

(01:02:52):
slammed my sore toe into like abig hunk of lava rock, well, at
least once, maybe not twice.
And that did not feel good on myalready fucked up toe.
So nothing like really hit me,and I don't even think the
soreness from all the hiking theday before it hit me, but then I
was like finished that, had asmoothie, then we go sit in the

(01:03:12):
hot tub, and then my toe juststarted like felt like it was
gonna explode.
It felt like there's a bomb inthere, and it was like just
ready to blow.
It hurt so bad, and just like Icould like feel every like
heartbeat and it was like boom,boom, boom.
I don't like what the fuck.
I was like, is it because I'm inthe hot tub?
What's going on?
And like it looked fine,although it was definitely my
toe was like noticeably largerthan the other big toe, but it

(01:03:36):
didn't look that bad.
Uh, but I still was like, ithurt so bad, and like I went up
to the hotel room and likepopped some tile and all and
just filled up like some saladmixing bowl that was in the
cupboard that they had andfilled it with like all the ice
in the fridge and water and justshoved it in there.
It was like so cold it hurt myfeet, but then it was like it
hurt my foot, but now it feltgood on my toe, so I just like

(01:03:56):
dipped my toe in there.
Eventually, like I think thetile kicked in, then I went back
down to the beach and swamaround, but then like my chest
and my legs started to hurt morefrom the the sun and the rash,
and then I think also maybe justthe soreness from hiking the day
before.
Because you also get scratchedup by all the branches and stuff
when you're going through junglewith stuff, so it's kind of
everything stings a little bitin the pool and the salt water.

(01:04:17):
So after that, I like justtotally was a potato for like
the rest of the night in theafternoon after like swimming
for a bit.
But I did a lot more hikingactually after that on that
fucked-up toe, which I'll maybetalk about next time.
But it was bizarre, like the toeitself, it didn't actually look
it hurt so bad for a long time,but it you could never tell

(01:04:40):
anything was wrong with it.
Like from outside visually, itlooked just fine, especially the
only thing really was like thefirst day, it just looked larger
than the other one.
Like that toe was bricked up,but it didn't have like any
discoloration to it.
It didn't even like wasn't evenreally red, it was just like
puffier, but not like it didn'tlook weirdly puffy, didn't look
like you know those dogs sung bybees where they got like the the

(01:05:02):
really fat face or anything, butit hurt so bad.
Like it was like it felt like Ihad like stubbing my toe over
and over on every heartbeat.
It was rough, but we survived.
It was I don't know, it took afew days to recover, especially
my whole chest.
I don't know if like do you putstuff on your boards or does
your skin just like toughen upfrom that?
I was like, I definitely willnot do that without a without a

(01:05:24):
shirt again because that thatsucked, especially I got
sensitive nipples.
Those were actually my nipplesjust turned to scabs.
I feel like even running in ashirt, I hardly ever do it
because they're pretty sensitiveand like start you know getting
shredded and bloody.
Uh and it was it was it waspretty miserable.
I didn't think about that.

(01:05:45):
I was like, I need pasties forthis.
Because I know like I think Ididn't realize this because I
didn't start running until laterin high school, but was like the
first long run I did on like auh a rainy day where your
shirt's like really heavy andrubbing on you.
Is it was it was rough.
It was like I did that long runand that where it really just
tears up your nipples.
But I didn't know this is thefirst time I've really been

(01:06:06):
running that much, anddefinitely in the rain where it
like amplifies it.
And then after practice, I gothome, took my shirt, hopped in
the shower, and I like shriekedlike a little girl because I'm
like, why the fuck do my nipplesfeel like they're raw?
And I look down and my nipplesare just like bleeding on the
shower, and I'm like, what thehell is going on?
And then I'm like, I guess noshirts from here on out it is,
and you know, we've kind of kindof lived by that since.

(01:06:28):
And I guess when it comes tosurfing, I might have to flip
the flip the cards, flip thetable, turn it around.
On that one, if you're goingraw, your nipples are just
getting shred on the board, ormaybe just I always gotta like
perfectly be like sealing on itwhere I'm keeping my my nips off
it.
For the rest of it, I yeah, Ifeel like I feel like there's I
guess like all the West Coastpeople here are probably

(01:06:50):
normally surfing as a wetsuitjust because it's so cold.
So I don't know about warmerplaces if you just you know
toughen up your skin.
Because it was like it was likekind of like a pattern like that
matched the mesh of the boardwhere I had like scabs like that
all over my chest.
It wouldn't it sound worse thanit is, like you couldn't really
see it that it wasn't thatvisible, but I could like feel
that around my chest.
It's like kind of rough, likealmost like scaly.
It's kind of gross, but uh wasyou know interesting, you know,

(01:07:15):
lots of lots of lore from thatexperience.
It was it was fun as a whole.
I would definitely like tocontinue surfing again, get
better, you know, be like thethe penguins from Surfs Up.
I don't even remember theirnames.
That's that rooster, that'd besick, you know, and give my game
up.
Surf one of those giant waves onthe shore that looks sick but
also terrifying.
I mean, I should probably don'twant to do that.

(01:07:36):
It'd be more fun to take the jetski out there where they like to
drop them off.
Although that's probably prettydangerous too.
I don't know how that works, butjet skis are a good time.
I would definitely be down forthat.
Okay, how do I how do I sign upfor that?
That might be, you know, nextside quest.
You know, let me go drop offsome surfers.

(01:07:58):
Whip or whip a jet ski throughthese giant, they're like
hundred-foot waves.
This is the thing with like thatthat uh coast on the Nepali
coast.
In the wintertime, it's likeactually insane the size of the
waves that come through there.
I kind of would like to do well.
I don't even know.
I think it is open year-roundfor hiking, but like just sit on
there and see some of thosemassive waves come in.
I don't know how regular it is,but some of them are insane.

(01:08:21):
But I think the real risk thoughis like the rain on that trail,
and like the streams get likeflooded, so you can't cross
them.
So I don't actually have anydesire to be on that trail when
uh there's any rain or any uhunaptable commission conditions.
I don't even know.
It was super beautiful, but itwas also kind of draining, so I
don't entirely know if I want todo it again.
But maybe it was fun.

(01:08:43):
But kayaking was also a littlebit fun.
I mean, pretty fun, but youdidn't have to be clenching your
butt cheeks the whole time asmuch.
So we'll see.
Rath is kind of the go-to thingbecause it's quick, a little
less uh strenuous, and becauseit's you know, I gotta pay.
Well, you gotta pay for kayaktoo, the kayak is more
expensive.
I don't know.
But lots of lots of goodadventures to be had, and we'll

(01:09:06):
see what the future brings.
And yeah, we're out of time, sowe got lots more to discuss next
time.
It's been real.
Um keep it classy, gang, andwe'll catch you in another week.
Peace, peace.