Mountain Madness & Tobacco Trouble (Ep. 6)

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The story starts with a mistake: a spur-of-the-moment zin and a stubborn first cigar that ends in a parking lot spiral. From there, the road opens wide. I head for Zion expecting Angel’s Landing and find something better—quiet miles beyond the crowds, a reminder that the best parts of a park often live past the famous lookout. In Moab, I trudge a sun-baked gravel road that turns into a rocky off-road climb where jeeps crawl and hikers fly, then step onto a cliff-edge viewpoint that makes fear and awe feel like the same breath.

Pike’s Peak brings a different kind of intensity. The summit is busy with cars and a train, but the descent is where things get real—dark clouds, fast choices, and that electric sense that mountains make their own rules. On the way out, curiosity shifts shape. I “rescue” tiny conifers, water them with cucumber-lime Gatorade, and start thinking about roots, survival, and the strange urge to nurture. Omaha is a softer gear: a date shake that finally lives up to the legend and a zoo day with baby elephants and giraffes that kick up my old fascination with animals and ethics.

Then the crash: a hotel parking lot cigar has me dry-heaving, the next morning’s drive turns dangerous, and a test back home names it—COVID. Two locked-down weeks turn into a blueprint. I dive into hardy-tree research, map out sun and shade, fence everything against deer, and start planting. Ginkgos for autumn gold, Dawn Redwoods that rocket skyward, cold-tolerant maple hybrids that bring color to a Midwest winter. Year by year, the yard fills in. What began as a chaotic road trip and a string of bad nicotine choices becomes a practice of growth you can see and touch.

If you like road stories, national parks, hard-won trail wisdom, and the slow satisfaction of building a living space you love, you’ll feel at home here. Listen now, share it with a friend who needs a nudge to take their next trip or plant their first tree, and tell us: which place—or project—changed you the most? Subscribe, leave a review, and join us for the next adventure.

Episode Transcript

SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
Hello everyone.
We are back with another episodeand your boy is not doing so
hot, feeling like I'm about toyak, cause um exciting moment.
Uh popped my first Zen.
Not necessarily a wise idea.
Um but I don't know.
I think I was just curious tohit up the bodega.
I don't know if that's the rightword.
I don't know.

(00:20):
I feel like I'd cheer thatpeople in like the East Coast
talking about that.
It's like just like theconvenience store.
Anyway, and copped one mostlybecause I was curious.
Um and I think I got the maybestronger ones in Y Boy Could Not
Hang.
I like put it in my mouth.
I was kind of hearse.
I'm like, it started to hit me,and I'm like, felt like I was, I
don't know, going for a ride andhad to spit that shit out
eventually.
But now I'm feeling a little bitnauseous, not the greatest.

(00:44):
Uh so I feel like that was, youknow, honestly probably the best
outcome.
But yeah, I just was curious forthe one time.
I feel like I have it's probablyjust not wise to be curious or
dabble in things that are prettyaddictive, you know, like
nicotine.
But I was just curious what it'sabout.
I mean, I guess them outrecently.

(01:04):
I like just impulsively off ofAmazon bought a whole pack of
like nicotine gum and chewedthat.
It's kind of similar the firsttime treated that.
Not maybe not as bad, it'sprobably a little bit weaker,
but that stuff.
I mean, I don't regularly do it.
I was just kind of curious.
I don't know.
And it's probably best not to.

(01:25):
But I don't know.
The curiosity is gonna kill thiscat for sure.
I don't know why.
Kind of like for lots of otherthings, I feel like I'm a very
addictive personality in termsof like just doing shit.
I'll get like, I don't know ifit's like ADHD focused, sort of,
you know, on the spectrum, likewhere it's like I get just well

(01:46):
totally totally absorbed insomething, total tunnel vision,
not want to do anything else orthink about anything else but
that until I finish it, and it'sreally hard to pull myself away.
Where I'm like, actually, Idon't know, like I don't feel
good, but I'm like justtweaking, I want to do whatever
this is or whatever I get likehyper-fixated on.
But not so much with other likeany any chemical stuff, which is

(02:08):
I guess good.
I think there's definitely beensome of the problems with that
in the family, so I reallyshouldn't be, you know,
experimenting with stuff.
Not that this is uh at all thatcrazy with how much I guess how
widespread or prevalent it is.
Um but yeah, maybe, maybe builda tolerance, but I guess
hopefully not.

(02:28):
Kind of reminds me a few, Iguess it was after finishing
undergrad smoking the firstcigar as that total wine, and
they saw they had the whole likehumidor room, and I was like
intrigued.
I'm like, oh wow, I feel likeI'm in like some Cuban like
room, I don't know, somemillionaires like fancy cigar
room.
Um and it was nothing fancy, soI bought like a five-dollar

(02:50):
cigar.
I was thinking about two ofthem.
My plan was it was I justgraduated um undergrad college,
and then I was like, bought oneof those.
I'm like, hmm.
I was planning to hike somemountain, Mount Baldy in
Southern California, and I waslike, oh Ms.
Phil, this will be fun.
I'll hike this mountain and tryto light this at the top.
Um, and that that didn't work.

(03:12):
I mean I tried.
I tried my best, got to themountain, sat on some, tried to
find some little cove hidden.
They have like kind of theselike rock shelters set up at the
mountain peak where people arekind of like set up and maybe
eat.
Or maybe I don't know if peoplecamp on the mountaintop.
I feel like that's not maybethey do.
I don't really know.
But I sat in one and spent likehalf hour trying to light this

(03:32):
cigar.
Did not work.
I went through like a whole boxof matches trying to light it,
and I did bring like a zippolighter and also totally burned
through all the fuel doing that.
I don't know if that's I don'tknow if you're not supposed to.
I mean, I think you can bringmatches.
I don't I don't know what's firehazard.
I mean at that point there'slike no trees around when you're
at that elevation.
I don't know what the elevationis.
I mean it's over 10,000.

(03:52):
I don't think it's I don't thinkit's 11, but it's like there's
enough wind on the mountain topwhere nothing was nothing was
gonna lie.
I I gave it my L, but that wasan L.
I did eventually smoke thesecond one, and that was that's
rough.
That was I guess a few weekslater, maybe like a week or two,
when I was driving back home,and at this point I was kind of

(04:15):
doing a little bit of a roadtrip out of it where I'd stop at
stuff along the way.
It's pretty fun.
So I think I first stopped at umZion, yeah.
Although this was 2022.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That summer.
And it was peak gas prices wherelike every gas station from LA

(04:36):
to Vegas that I stopped at waseverything was$6.99.
So I think I paid like$130 for atank of gas a few times.
That was so painful.
I was I don't know, just hurt.
I guess I was glad I didn't havemy my first truck that I had.
I guess the first truck, I guessboth my trucks have been F-150s.

(04:59):
I had some older used one that Igot first when I turned 16.
And I did like that truck a lot.
It had a 36-gallon fuel uh fueltank, which was super nice that
I like could fill that thing uplike once a month, especially
when I was only going to andfrom school, really, or to
practices and shit.
And that I mean that's soridiculous.

(05:19):
Like how big that is nice andconvenient that you don't have
to fill it up.
But it was even when gas wascheap in the middle of nowhere,
it was still like I could be ahundred bucks to fill up.
So if I had to fill that thingup, that would have been like a
200.
I mean, yeah, that's you know250 250 for a goddamn tank of
gas.

(05:40):
But it the the second truck Igot was a little bit newer, um,
and that has like a 20 gallon,so I mean still DC size tank
would not not the as painful tofill up, although it doesn't
really matter.
It still would still was roughall around.
That was crazy though.
It was I guess so I had theoriginal truck, and the second
truck I got ended up being, Ithink it was, yeah, it was

(06:04):
basically brand new, but it wassome truck that had been sitting
on the the lot for like a yearor two.
So it was one that the thedealership wanted to get rid of
because it was like a new truckbut from a few years ago that
they just hadn't sold.
And my mom was car shopping forI don't know why.
I think that she was wanting toget a new car because my sister
was about to turn 16 that shemaybe wanted to pass on her old

(06:26):
car to her.
And she went to this dealershipand I came home.
I think she she maybe took mytruck there.
I don't remember, but she's likepulled up in a new truck, and
she's like, I was like, where'smy truck?
She's like, Oh, like I tried todo it.
I'm like, what?
But I guess I got a nicer truckout of the deal, so I was I
mean, I was could not complain.
I was I was very hyped.
So it was it's nice.

(06:46):
I like, I mean, don't only, Imean, I feel like it's it's very
nice.
It's gotten lots of love.
I'm I try to take care of it,and um hopefully it can last me
forever.
Cars are ridiculously expensive.
I mean, uh, I can't cop one now.
I mean, I don't even know.
I do like that it's got it's notso new that it's got like all

(07:07):
the crazy touch screen stuff.
It's got like a screen on it,but it's got all the buttons.
I like the manual buttons.
I feel like I hate the cars,like the Tesla's where it's like
the I had with a milliondifferent options.
Drives me crazy trying to figureout how to do stuff.
So this one's got oh, this oneactually had Bluetooth.
My first truck did not.
I had to like get an aux cord.
Although I guess even a phoneout, that would be kind of an L.

(07:28):
It'd have to get like one ofthose adapters for your phone,
or if you've ever used, I don'tknow, maybe I'm dating myself,
and y'all had to use the uhthere's like these um like mock
radio stations where you couldlike plug this thing into like
the car charging port, and itwould basically make I just it
wasn't like a Bluetooth channel,it would like, or I guess you'd
connect your phone by Bluetoothof these things, and then it

(07:50):
would make like a fake radiochannel broadcast that you
would, I mean it's not fake itis a real trip like radio
broadcast, I assume, and thenyou would like tune your car to
that and that would be like someof your your leg Bluetooth.
It worked decent enough.
I feel like I did it for a fewuh you know high school drives
or road trips with some homieswhen we had driving some beer
cars around.
I remember one of my one of myboys, he had a I don't know,

(08:13):
it's just some like old sedan,but he had crazy subs in the
back of it where if you turnedthem on, they were like too
strong where it would actuallyknock, like knock his rear view
mirror like just off.
I don't I don't know how thathappened, but like you know, the
bass would drop in a song andhis fucking rear view mirror
would just fall off into ourlaps.
And like, what the hell?
Like your car's actually gettingtaken apart and demolished by

(08:35):
your damn speakers.
It's pretty entertaining.
I mean, gotta love it.
But so that was that was theactually the biggest upgrade
that I was hyped about.
I think it had some I mean,other a few other bells and what
it's not like uh crazy, itwasn't crazy fancy, but I was I
was very grateful.
Anyways, where was I going?
Oh yeah, it's I was driving,driving, bouncing around.

(08:56):
Okay, from California.
Um first stopped in Zion becauseI was gonna as like I could, you
know, really just get back homeand like I think it's maybe like
24-ish hours of driving, butkind of wanted to make a funeral
trip out of it, find some stuffalong the way.
So I mean it was ended up beinga little bit more roundabout.
Um, but stopped at Zion.

(09:17):
So I basically stopped at a fewparks and then would like spend
a day hiking at it and then justdrive all day the next day.
So I stopped at Zion and didsome like big hike.
I tried to do there's like thisAngel's Landing thing, which is
kind of this cool rock, thiskind of sketchy thing.
You gotta like crawl and pullyourself up by chains to go to
this cool overlook point.
But there's like some permitsthat you have to like apply to

(09:37):
get.
I did try.
There's like, I mean, like amaybe further out lottery that
you can apply for if you reallywant a specific day, or they
have like a daily lottery, butthat one's also maybe a little
bit more iffy to get.
I did try, I didn't get itsadly, so I just like hiked up
past the point of it.
Um it was super busy those firstfew miles.
It was a good little hike thatfirst three miles, then I ended

(09:57):
up hiking like another 20 milesthrough some big loop in the
park that's cool.
You didn't get up to this rockabove this angel landings,
Angels Landing rock to like kindof look out, which is a pretty
cool view because you're alittle bit higher up and you can
see that point.
It would be cool to go back andhike that.
Um but hiked through some bigtrails and kind of the desert,
cool red rocks.

(10:18):
Although I feel like the backpart of this trail, I did
remember like reading thisreview on like all trails at the
second half of it, it was boringas shit, and it definitely was.
Because it's kind of like you'redoing this big loop, and I and
then you go back down the sameway you came.
But I think with some of therecommendations were like just
go halfway and turn around,which I definitely should have
done, because of the second partof that loop going back around

(10:38):
was like there's nothing cool tosee.
It was just like overgrown, likethorny trees and shrubs.
So I was just getting likecouldn't see anything cool, and
I was just getting scraped toshit by all these rough branches
and cut up, and that part wasn'tgreat.
I mean, it's it's still fun,still good vibes.
Um, and then at that point, it'sit's pretty quiet because I
think I mean it was supercrowded, even though I started

(10:59):
pretty early.
I mean, it started way before alot of people got there because
I knew I was gonna be gone andwanted to get a spot to park, so
I could get to the parks prettyearly.
But um hiked around for the day.
Uh the first three miles I waskind of like gotta like fight
through people, especially whenyou're trying to like hoof it,
because most people are kind ofI mean, these are average Joes
and you know, families, youknow, on their road trips going

(11:21):
to see this thing, so they'relike getting gassed up or like
just totally winded on likeevery turn.
So I mean it's kind of rough.
But then it's also kind ofannoying when you're trying to,
you know, make good pace becauseyou got a big day ahead of you,
so it's like kind of weaving andbobbing, dodging up, dip diving
and dodging all the way aroundto the top.
I think yeah, I think it wasonly like three miles up there,

(11:42):
maybe less.
I don't know.
That seems kind of far.
But I think it was about that,which is honestly for like folks
like that, that's the that's arough day, a rough go of it, but
it's cool.
Um But then when it's past that,it's kind of nice that it's
quiet.
I do like pretty places whereit's like, yeah, then you're
kinda on your own.
It's kinda it's kind of fun.
Sometimes kind of spooky, butalso kind of cool when you feel

(12:03):
like you're out there so alone.
So like you feel soinsignificant, which is I mean,
it's kind of like humbling, butkind of spooky, kind of fun.
I don't know, it's kind of alittle bit of a rush.
Not so much when maybe aboutthis one.
There's sometimes when you'relike hiking mountains, you're
like, wow, like ten feet over,that's just like a straight
drop.
That's like you dead there.
It's kind of I don't know, thatsounds kind of morbid, but not

(12:25):
in like a spook uh I don't know,not in a bad way, but it's kind
of like trippy.
If you're ever driving on likethe interstate and you realize
like if you like hit somethingat that speed, like you that's
you're not gonna be in goodshape.
It's like wow.
Like danger is like right there.
It's kind of a spooky feeling.

(12:45):
But I guess it's like probablygood to recognize, you know,
good to be aware.
But also, I guess if you gotanxiety, maybe it's not, maybe
you're better off just not doingit if it makes you bug out.
So I went to Zion.
Oh, I think the town I was, youknow, stayed at, or maybe drove
through.
There's a town called likeVirgin, Utah.
They had to rename it after Ileft, obviously.

(13:07):
Um, I'm not gonna elaboratefurther.
Uh but stayed there, go hike forthe day, and yeah, find uh find
a nice little local restaurant,pull up, eat there, and then go
usually go back to the hotel andchill in the hot tub and yap
with people.
That's always a good vibe oflike traveling and then you know
doing some crazy shit all daylong and having a hotel to go

(13:30):
back to to shower and vibe inthe hot tub and see who you talk
to.
So always always someinteresting conversations, I'll
say.
Um yeah, it was kind of a goodvibe.
It's kind of like I prefer it'slike a little bit more of you
know like glamping, althoughit's not even like it's not even
camping.
Man, it's not even like I mean,there's some glamorous parts of
it.
I haven't really done any likeproper backpacking, honestly.

(13:51):
I've done some like sort ofquasi-camping on some like
school trip once where we wentto like Arizona for a few days.
That was kind of cool, that wasfun camping out around like the
Grand Canyon area.
I mean, not I don't know howclose to the actual Grand Canyon
we were, but somewhere in likethose elevated areas of Arizona.
Anywho, um most of the hikesthat I like to do are kind of

(14:12):
like long like hikes that takeme all day that are normally a
several-day backpacking trip forpeople, but I like to just you
know kind of fly through it andthen also don't need to bring
all this stuff like cookingstuff, uh sleeping stuff.
I mean, that just sounds like apain, and it's I don't know, it
sounds kind of like rough to behiking with all that on your
back and lugging that allaround.

(14:33):
So it's kind of fun that you canum, you know, pack light and you
know, just hoof it, go fast, andthen get back to a a nice hotel
with a nice bed and you canshower off the rigid all grimy.
I mean, I think backfiting couldbe fun, but I don't know.
I feel like there's lots ofthings.
I mean, you should probably getused to it.
Also, you know, having an actualbathroom, that's you know, a

(14:53):
luxury relatively compared towhat you gotta do when you're
hiking in the wilderness.
Luckily, I've never had to, youknow, drop a dookie on a hike.
I've had some homies I have to,and especially the places where
you gotta like, you know, packyour shit out.
I'm like, I would not be a fanof, you know, bagging my own
shit up like my dogs and youknow, just throwing it in the
bag and having to carry it out.

(15:14):
I mean, I get why you gotta doit.
Like, if everyone's doing that,if everyone's, you know, going
doo-doo on the trail, it's gonnaadd up even if you're digging it
up and burying it.
There's, you know, only so muchmountain for people to be
dropping dung.
So you gotta pack it up, pack,pack, pack up, back out, leave
no trace.
I forgot I forget what the thesayings are.
What's it?

(15:34):
There's also something you gottacarry, like a wag bag.
I don't know what that standsfor.
Is that an acronym waste andgross?
I have no idea.
Maybe I don't know if it'sactually an acronym.
But I know I've had some friendsthat have like gone places where
you actually like need to haveit.
And I don't know what likespecifically counts as that.
It's kind of a thing.
It's sort of like a weird likerule, or like I don't know how

(15:56):
you enforce it, but like can youjust say this bag is a bag I'm
gonna shit in?
Can it just be any bag?
It's gotta be a special doo-doobag.
I don't know.
If you know, let me know.
Holla at your boy.
But I've never had to do that.
I've I mean I guess I've onlydone like one day thing, so I'm
sure if you do longer, you gottago.
And I normally don't pack thatmuch for food and drink.

(16:18):
I think I did the first time todo like hike and pack a lot more
and get heavy.
But the thing is I don't like toeat that much while I'm going.
My stomach is like sometimes itgets upset.
I've gotten better at it.
What I used to do, which ispretty headass, I would like buy
a box of brownie bites and legitjust eat like 2,000 calories of
like brownie bites, like a wholebig thing of it, and then hike.
And sometimes, dude, I wouldfeel atrocious going up.

(16:41):
I'd also just be totally likeripping ass on the way up.
Anyone who had to like be in thevicinity was probably not having
a good time.
Luckily, I was mostly hikingalone.
But that was that fucking thatwreaked havoc on my guts, eating
all that, and then trying tohike up a mountain.
I mean, it worked though.
I felt good.
Well, okay, like energylevel-wise, I felt good.
Maybe like uh gut-wise, didn'tfeel great.

(17:04):
It was not the the idealsituation.
Um, but you know, it was early,early uh revision, early model
of my uh hiking feeling as Ilearned.
My new pinnacle typically isjust a lot of cucumber lime uh
Gatorade.
I'm a big fan of the cum line.
G juice, as they call it.
Uh it's it's pretty gas.

(17:25):
Definitely my favorite Gatorade.
I don't think, yeah, no, nothingtops that.
So I would just like go to thegas or normally the the grocery
store in these towns I top, Ijust like buy like an eight-pack
or twelve pack, whatever.
I think they're actually maybemore than six packs.
If they're like the regular sizeones or like the extra, you
know, girthy bottles, those like32-ounce ones, maybe those, and

(17:45):
I just either fill my bag withthem or like eventually, you
know, upgrade to a bladder.
Although eventually broke RIP.
I'll get to that later.
But just do that and chug that,and it's like there's enough
sugar in that where I'm like,you know, I'm getting some maybe
not nutrients, but I'm gettingsome energy to keep, you know,
hoofing it through the mountainsor the deserts or wherever that
I may be, through the forests.

(18:06):
So I'm gonna, you know, I'mgonna be uh a healthy snack for
whatever bear I come across.
And hopefully got the the gas,the the feel to get out of
dodge, but you never know.
So that's normal to do.
Sometimes I'll bring sometreats, honestly.
I don't usually eat them.
Sometimes I'll have one of themon bake myself, but if I'm

(18:26):
really sipping the the cum limejuice, I'm usually doing pretty
good.
I sometimes have done some, youknow, probably not the best
thing to do, you know, offeeding wildlife with some of my
stuff.
Sometimes it's entertaining.
There was this one time though,I didn't realize this until
after a fact.
I probably killed like a wholefamily of you know, at least
chipmunks in one of these hikes.

(18:47):
I was giving it a cliff bar,maybe like a chocolate one or a
coffee one, and I didn't realizetill after the fact that it has
does have caffeine, and I likeshowed a picture to or video of
it to one of my homies, and he'slike, bro, that's kind of
caffeine.
You just killed that that thatlittle chit.
I'm like, nah, he's good, he'sgood, he's built different.
But I was like, oh shit, he'sright.
That I hope I hope he didn't eatthat.

(19:08):
I hope he shared, or maybe evenif sharing killed him all, so
maybe I hope only he ate it, ormaybe something else came and
ate it.
I don't know.
I don't really know what istoxic to stuff, but I know,
yeah, like caffeine.
Because I think that's why dogscan have chocolate because
there's like sort of some it's Idon't know if it's exactly
caffeine, or something that'sbasically the same effect, or

(19:30):
some sort of stimulant, and thenthey can't process it fast
enough, or like they don't breakit down, so they just basically
have a heart attack.
And I think that's what's theproblem with uh caffeine for
dogs, maybe cats too.
Can cats have chocolate?
I don't know.
I guess I wouldn't try it.
So I don't know what animals arewe like the only one that'd be
fiending on the caffeine beans?

(19:50):
Well, I would guess cats aremaybe somewhat better.
Because there's those likebougie coffees where it's like
these wild cats in the junglesof South America, they like eat
the coffee beans and shit themout, and then they go digging in
the dung for the little likedigested beans and they make
coffee out of that.
I think.
I don't know, don't quote me,but there's something like
weird, like coffee cat, junglecat poop coffee or some

(20:14):
expensive thing.
I'm don't think I really want totry it, but I'm kind of curious
as to what the hell that tasteslike.
And it's like it's I like I feellike it can't be good, it's just
gotta be you're some Dbillionaire on some freak shit,
you know.
That's that's just how you getup in the morning, you know,
just because you can.
And because it's expensive, notbecause it's good, but maybe I

(20:36):
don't know.
I'm I'm skeptical to say theleast.
But so hopefully, hopefully, youknow, maybe they got some dark
hand for squirrels and they goton that.
They're cute, shouldn't havedone it, but they keep pressing
me.
And that's definitely not a goodway to stop it, but it's kind of
entertaining watching thislittle chipmunk with this whole
thick, like cliff bar that wasthe size of it, and him like

(20:58):
hobbling around a rock with it.
So it's normally uh outside ofmy my Gatorade, occasionally
bring some of those or stingerwaffles, those are pretty fire,
but we'll say those are justlike good.
That I did give to uh otherchipmunk, that was pretty cute.
This is like a little chipmunk,this big waffle.
And I think that was safer.
Still not good for you knowconditioning wildlife, so don't

(21:19):
do that.
Do as I say, not as I do,whatever they say, you know, all
that jazz.
But uh I think oh, I think I didbring a baguette once from the
grocery store.
I bought some like freshbaguette, it was pretty bussing,
I will say.
Got the bread on the this candyand topas much another baguette.
Just needed some head to youknow, complete the day that I've

(21:42):
been she has her keys.
There that's there's a motion.
Anywho.
Those are the the the standardfuels.
So first day of Zion.
Trovia Vegas through Vegas.
Oh, I did try.
I guess I'm like bouncing allaround.
Maybe I'll go back to camp.

(22:04):
Nothing that I guess we'llcontinue on.
We did stop in or I mean, wow,I'm saying we, I guess just me.
Well, I did have turtle eggswith me, so me and all these
little unhatched is it unborn?
What is it like?
Do you like do you say is itlike you are you say you're born

(22:24):
or you're hatched if you're aturtle?
I don't know.
What's like more are they likethe same?
Is like born like a a genericterm or hatched?
Like is it like hatched a subsetof born?
I don't know.
This is a good question.
One of those philosophicalquestions that really doesn't
matter.
Anywho.

(22:45):
I think it was slightly outsideof Vegas.
The only real stop I remember,other than like where I was just
getting my my wallet booty holejust totally ripped and shredded
at the gas station.
So the only other stop I did wasI saw some big old billboard for
date shakes, you know, likethose, you know, measual dates,
but in a shake.
And I was like, the only reasonI stopped was because I went on

(23:07):
this field trip with where wedrove to Arizona that's pretty
talking about where I did thiscamping trip, and me and a
homie, we were driving like somerental car with the professor
for the class, and he was he'san entertaining dude yapping
about all sorts of stuff.
But one thing he like did notshut up about was like date
shakes.
And it's like, have you ever hadone?
We're like, No, what is that?
It's like I was just dates andice cream, but wounded up, and
he was just like a raven.

(23:29):
And you know, at one point westopped at some random like ice
cream shop.
He's like, Do you have any dateshakes?
And they're just like, Look atthis old dude.
They're like, bro, what what areyou talking about?
And he's like, Okay, whatever.
We just got we got ice cream outthe deal.
So I wasn't mad, but I was kindof intrigued with the lore of
these date shakes that I'd neverreally heard of.
It was a good trip.
I'll I'll rehash that later atsome point.
But I did see some big billboardthat was advertising date

(23:51):
shakes.
I was like, I gotta stop for theboy, you know.
Um so I did try it.
It was it's pretty good.
Would recommend.
Um, I mean, I don't know if it'slike my favorite up there, but
it was definitely a solid shake,it's definitely different.
Um, especially if you're a fanof dates, which I am, they're
pretty good.
It was it goes well with icecream.
I guess I didn't think itwouldn't, but I was just you
know curious, had to try it.
And I did feel like I think Imade some my own or like

(24:12):
attempted to.
I don't know if I blended it.
I maybe just chopped them up.
No, I think I did blend it in ina smooth like a blender at home,
made it like a milkshakesmoothie with them after the
fact to make the fam try it, youknow, keep the date shake alive.
But then yeah, just uh Zionhiked today, then next stop, I
believe I went to Moab, Utah,yes.

(24:34):
That's where they have ArchesNational Park.
I'd stopped there once before, Iguess when I was going out to
California the first time withmy mom, that was fun.
And uh so I got there, hung out.
Um then the next day I foundsome trail.
I guess I I wasn't like toodidn't feel the need to go to
arches necessarily so muchbecause I've kind of been there

(24:55):
before.
And there wasn't a whole lot ofhiking.
There are some things, like somearches that you could hike to a
ways, but I was like, eh.
It's not, it doesn't sound likeI mean it's cool, but it's kind
of like, you know, it's an archor whatever.
No hate though.
But I saw some trail, it waslike top of the world, and it
was saying something about thiscool view in this big canyon in
the middle of the desert, andit's like a 20-mile hike through

(25:17):
the desert.
And so I just like basicallydrive to the desert to some
random like parking lot thing.
I mean it got there early andjust started like walking on
this basically a gravel road inthe desert for like 10 miles um
one way, and it was like I was Iwas like, I was so skeptical.
I was like, am I like, did I goto the wrong thing?

(25:37):
I like I had the GPS on mywatch, and it was telling me I
was in the right spot, but I waslooking around, it's like this
is just bare desert.
Like, what the hell is going on?
Like, this is boring.
Like dirt bikes that said what'sup, some guys on like, you know,
those gators, those side-by-sidethings.
It was pretty boring, just hot.
I was just like walking,slurping the gatorade and just

(25:58):
baking in the desert sun.
You know, one of those gooddesert vibe, you know, character
building experiences.
Then the last like three miles,it turned to like this really
like rocky, it wasn't thatsteep, but it was like a really
extreme terrain.
And it turned to like someextreme Jeep like off-road
course.
So that's pretty fun thatthere's like these super souped

(26:20):
up like jeeps that were likejust like trying to drive over
these boulders and go around.
It was kind of cool to see, butthey were going so damn slow.
Like, I was actually passing allthese jeeps, like walking on my
way up because they had to goslow, so slow over this like
crazy terrain.
They were cool jeeps to see, andit's kind of fun to watch them
drive through it or try to getstuck sometimes.
I don't know.
I feel it's gonna be pretty hardon them.

(26:42):
I kind of want to try it, but itwas fun to like walk through
them and walk by these guys juststruggling onto them, struggling
to get their jeeps up theserocks, kind of flexing on them.
Like, boy, I can walk fasterthan you guys right now.
I beat all of them to the top,but once I got to the top, it
was it was definitely worth it.
Like, because like out ofnowhere, like you've been just
walking through like boringdesert.
I mean, you look around, youjust see some you know dart and

(27:03):
weeds and sun.
And then all of a sudden you getto this like big clearing and
you say, Holy shit, this is abig canyon.
And there's like this cool likepoint to the rock where they
like go park their jeeps on, andlike there's like kind of
nothing underneath it, so itmakes a cool pick.
But no one was there.
I was like the first person upjust walking.
I mean, I don't I think peopleI'm guessing not many people
hike it.
Mostly it's the the jeep peoplegoing to off-road and go park

(27:26):
their car up there, but I took anice pick.
I had to like set up my phone ona rock and go run to them the
top and like go like throw myarms up in there, strike a pose
on this rock for a cool pick anddid that.
They may try on some other ones,but I feel like I just get
nervous by the edge.
Like, I don't know how peoplelike dangle their feet over the
edge.
That makes me too nervous, youknow.
My my asshole gets a little bittight, real real clenched up

(27:48):
when I get kind of a little tooclose to the edge.
I'm like, I don't know.
I don't know.
I'm not gonna be one of thosepeople that take a selfie and
just fall off uh into thecanyon.
Wasn't trying to do that.
But it was it was fun, fun day,different, different vibes.
You never know what you're gonnacome across out there.
And then hiked back, found somelittle restaurant in the town

(28:08):
again, pulled up at the barthere and ate a little steak or
something, said it was up tosome random people that were
there, and it was a good time,nothing to nothing too eventful,
just kind of fun to go aroundand see what you come across or
who you say was up to.
But from yeah, that was Moab.
And then from there, oh wait.

(28:30):
Yes, yeah, from there went toPikes Peak.
Yeah, because I had a homeboystaying in Colorado Springs for
the summer, so I stayed withhim, and then we decided to
spend the day hiking Pike's Peakafter I got there, which is
pretty fun.
It was it's like a 26-ish.
I don't know if that's right.

(28:51):
It's it's like 7,000 feet-ishand like 26-ish or mid-20 miles.
I don't know.
Doesn't really matter.
But we started, it's a long day.
It's it's pretty fun.
Although it is like cool thatit's one of those well, I don't
know if it's cool.
Actually, it's kind of less coolthat it's one that's got like
stuff at the top.
It's nice that there's stuff atthe top in terms for like food

(29:12):
and like you know, somewhere toyou know take a piss and get
some drink of food.
But then it's also kind ofcrowded, so it's a little bit
like less fun because there'slike a big road up to the top.
And then there's also a trainthat goes all the way up, which
we I mean I kind of wanted tohike the whole thing, but I
think maybe he was maybeinterested in like you know
getting a ride back down, whichyou know we should always well,

(29:33):
there's there's been some eventswhere we should have just gone
back down and tried to getrides, and that didn't go well,
but that's this isforeshadowing.
Uh it's another story foranother day.
But we you know hung out at thetop for a minute.
It's cool up there.
The thing is though, it got alittle bit spooky on the way
down.
A lot of times in like themountains, especially in
Colorado and the summers,there's like just random
thunderstorms that roll throughin the afternoon.

(29:53):
So you want to be pretty like uhspeedy when you're you know
going up and getting down so youcan be like off the mountain or
at least.
the the the what do they call itthe rage line where there's like
no trees there's some liketimber line is that what it is
the timber line maybe think butbasically it's like where the
trees just stop growing becauseI don't know if it's like I
don't know what the biggestfactor is if it's the air is

(30:15):
like too gets a little bit thinand probably also like the soil
is not that great of themountain maybe not eroded enough
or maybe I don't know I don'tknow what's the biggest factor
that defines the timber line.
That would be interesting toknow if someone else let your
boy know but we were like so wego up we didn't realize we could
have like you know taken a ridedown or whatever because there's

(30:36):
like a whole like road up tothere and like a train line down
and we on the way down we hearthe whole the train honking the
whole time like dang we shouldhave maybe taken that that back
down because sometimes goingdown is worse because your legs
are tired and you're just likeslamming your feet down even
though it's like not as tiringon like your joints going uphill
when you're just kind of likeplotting down your knees hurt
and you just your feet hurt it'snot always that great.

(31:00):
But um where was I going withthat?
Oh yeah all of a sudden like itstarted to get like really dark.
We were like inside this cloudand it was like a little bit
spooky we're just like trying tolike go down the damn mountain
back to the trees as fast as wecan so you know if there is
lightning uh nothing is gonnahit us.
We didn't we looked at theforecast and checked the weather
there was nothing like nomention of storms but I think

(31:22):
this can be just so like suddenand unpredictable that you just
gotta be ready and ready to getout of there and it was just
like dark and you're in thiscloud I was kind of I was pretty
nervous didn't didn't like it.
It was kind of I mean it waskind of exciting kind of fun but
also like I want to get the hellout of this.
It did just nothing happenedwe're just in these spooky
clouds so it just really turnedthe spook up for for whatever

(31:43):
reason Mother and Nature justwanted to play with us a little
bit.
Didn't get the the staticelectricity feel your hair start
to rise I think one of hisroommates what worked maybe like
for like uh search and rescuefor the mountain and they talked
about like having to bring downlike oxygen tanks the people
that were like having altitudesickness and needed air and
they'd be like hiking down tothese people and all of a sudden

(32:04):
they are in a cloud like thatbut they feel their hair start
to rise so there's like like athunder cloud so they just like
throw these big metal tankswhich you definitely don't want
on your back when you're goddamnthunder cloud.
You don't want to be wearing thebig metal lightning rod in a
lightning storm so they have tolike throw them off and just run
for the tree line which soundskind of terrifying kind of fun
but have anything uh that highstakes eventually made it back

(32:27):
down did cop I don't know thisis maybe not you maybe not
you're probably not supposed todo this.
So allegedly we maybe you knowon the way down just for fun
harvested a few small trees andsaved them for you know
gardening purposes which waskind of fun.
Although it's like get off themountain grabbed on some

(32:49):
burgers.
Oh that was the first time Iever tried an alcoholic shake
kind of ass I'd rather just havea shot of vodka and then a
milkshake.
It's not that great mixed Idon't I think there's a lot of
like things there's a lot oflike mixed drinks where I'd
rather just have the shot andthe drink.
Not everything.
Some cocktails some I'mdefinitely kind of a a big fan
kind of a slut for some likesweet cocktails.

(33:11):
Some of them.
Although if you have too manyyou can feel really gross the
next day if you have like waytoo much sugary stuff so be
careful.
Drink responsibly but yeah noI'd probably just get regular
milkshake next time and someburgers.
Then we had to go to Home Depotto get some dirt and like pots
for these little trees that wetried to you know extract.

(33:33):
It's crazy though like littletrees how deep their roots go
and like how extensive they arejust for like something that's
like the size of your likethumb.
I like thought of a tree at homethat was like growing in a rock
bed and it was like maybe thesize of like my pinky nail like
the nail itself just like thislittle like butt of like tree
leaves or needles and it waslike carefully excavating the
rocks and pulling them out tolike try to like disturb or like

(33:56):
not break any as few roots aspossible.
And it was like the size of myhand and then like just like
this little tree like that withall these roots.
But I did get them out and havelike planted in a little pot for
a while and grew and now it's inthe yard in a bigger spot.
So it's it's done good.
But that was just like in looserocks when it's in like mountain
and like it's somehow sproutedand survived a few mountain

(34:16):
winters it's probably like gotto be like at least five years
old some of these little treesand getting them out they're
like really entrenched in deeprock so I think it's maybe
probably not that easy to getthem out.
Although at least most of theones we took were like in the
trail itself so they're justgonna get trampled anyways or
like cut down so I didn't reallyyou know feel too bad about it.
Some of them I feel like most ofthem were probably just a little

(34:38):
bit too shredded being pulledout of the ground but I did find
one like decent sized one thatwas able to get out in like a
good clump of dirt and thatone's actually still kicking in
the yard at home.
I planted it and that onesurvived a few winters.
I think that might be the onlyone but it's also like my
favorite one so I'm kind of Iwas hyped that that one is
making it but we kind of wellhad yeah basically I filled up
all these like old Gatoradebottles each had like a

(34:59):
different tree in it.
Because I didn't really know howto do with like a loose tree how
do you hike down a mountain withthat but it's like I'll have all
these loose Gatorade bottles sothese trees got nurtured by the
the the sweet kisses of Gatoradecucumber lime and that's you
know what kept them thriving atleast until we got to Home Depot
and got some dirt and littlepots to put them in.
And then I drove those the restof the way home from there.

(35:22):
Although the next day after thatlike I woke up in the morning
and oh I did not like I mean Ithis is pretty normal though I
assume it was just oh I don'tknow I s I can't say for certain
what it was but it was likepretty like sore throat and
stuff which I feel likehappened.
And sometimes when you're justlike hiking at altitude and it's
like dry air and you'rebreathing hard it can kind of

(35:42):
like you know really leave alittle bit raspy.
That happened to be a lot inCalifornia not even um hiking
all the time but racing crosscountry particularly when I'd
race track in the 800s whenyou're like really running and
like sucking air like you knowreally really sucking that shit
slurping it up pause um hard forjust two minutes quick giving it

(36:03):
everything the air there waslike so dry.
Because this didn't happen forlike cross country races which
you'd think it might which arelonger and you really do think
you're doing it but I don't knowif there's something the way I
was huffing a puffin for an 800meter made it meet an 800 meter
race can't talk.
There we go.
That that California air thenext morning I'd be like talking

(36:24):
like I had like one of thosestomas where I'm like like
trying to talk and like I'd havemeetings at some points like
with like a research professorand advisor I was trying to talk
to her and I'm like I can't talkI don't know why but I think it
was with air so I thought it waslike that and my throat was a
little bit sore after thishiking but whatever I was I just
think it was just the altitude.
Because from there I went toNebraska Omaha yes Omaha is that

(36:48):
where Warren Buffett's from Ithink so should have said it was
uh actually I don't know if he'sfrom there.
That's besides the point.
Um got there and then spent theday there because I wanted to go
to the zoo.
You boys a big fan of zoos andmy mom came down because I was
not too far only a few morehours from home to join me to go
spend a day at the Omaha zoo andI was pretty hyped to go because

(37:12):
they had uh um a pair of babyelephants that were super
adorable that was kind of likethe main draw for me.
I mean although I like going tozoos like any of them in general
to see what they got.
They had this like giant bigglass dome for like their
reptiles and stuff inside whichis hype um gives me you know
design exp ideas and inspirationfor how I want to construct my

(37:34):
own uh reptile animal etcmenagerie is that the right word
yeah menagerie I think so itsounds kind of menagerie qua
menagerie sounds French is aFrench I don't know I think
there's I think it's like athing though in like I know too
much about well actually I don'tknow that much to be honest.
I've just looked at like exoticanimal laws by different states

(37:55):
and like there's a few with likeno laws.
I think like Wisconsin's one ofthem like really states where
they uh can basically there'syeah I don't think there's like
anything you could have a tigeror whatnot.
And I think there's a few statesthere may be a few others maybe
like North Carolina I don'tknow.
I forget which ones.

(38:16):
But then I think in the past fewyears I was looking and they
passed some dumb law like whereno one can have a tiger and
that's dumb some big cat law.
I need like an NRA for exoticanimals.
Where are they at though forreal?
I that I want that in theConstitution you got the right
to have a tiger cub little tigerkitty um anyways I think I've
seen well menagerie.

(38:38):
I think I learned that we'replaying Brutenscape because
that's where you'd like haveyour summoner pets if anyone's
familiar with that.
I don't actually know if that'sthe right thing but it's just
some game and then you could Iwas obsessed with getting these
like parrots that were like eachbased on a god and I wanted one
of them.
But I don't think I ever got itnever grinded that hard in that

(38:58):
game but became familiar withthat word.
Learned something you knowlearned lots of words from video
games some dirty shit but Ithink I just ref was you know it
reintroduced itself into myvocabulary because reading about
like Montana laws at one pointand it's like they do have laws
but it's like unless you unlessthis is a menagerie which is

(39:19):
loosely defined if you just sayoh this is my this is my
menagerie like the rules don'tapply or something you can just
you know have a whole elephant.
But the Omahazu had some coolglass stone that was like if I'm
you know somewhere cold stillwith these big old tortoises
they're gonna eat some you knowwinter habtats that's a good
idea.
And other cool stuff.

(39:40):
Oh they did have got to feedsome giraffes that was fun.
Give them some branches and theyjust got some crazy tongue game
they're just you know lickingthat wood up if you know what I
mean.
And it's like and just eat thesewhole branches it's pretty good
pretty entertaining.
It's a good time.
Do they have anything else?
Oh they have ostriches I want anostrich they're not that hard to
get hold of there's some likefarms in the US maybe Texas but

(40:03):
I think they live in the coldtoo like maybe if I see I've
seen stuff of them in Canadathere's some ostrich farms
there.
Those motherfuckers are bigthough they're huge.
They got like I don't even knowit's like a shack of a chicken.
It's they got some like eventhough they're not the b though
there are like other stuff likeemus I can see how that like

(40:26):
would fuck you up.
I think there's like it fromAustralia and they've like had
problems with them.
There's like legit like a thingwhere it was in some war where
the emus were just going crazyand the like Australian army had
to like fight the emus and theylost and they just got
outnumbered by emu just kickingthem to shit.
But like ostrich is like doublethat like they're scary looking
but they're awesome.

(40:47):
I feel like I've seen thingswhere people tried to ride them.
They're they're pretty coolthat'd be fun to have one
running around.
Especially the little hatched alittle chip.
Make ostrich omeless it'd be funto have ostrich farm I wonder if
it's good like I have not reallytried other like eggs.
I mean I think I don't eventhink I've had I feel like I've
bought like duck eggs or likequail eggs but they weren't like

(41:08):
actually just like eggs they'relike stuff that was already like
hard boiled or something.
Was it duck eggs?
There was some like it's likesome Chinese thing or I don't
know some Asian country thingwith that at Costco and I
thought it'd be good but likethese things I guess are
apparently only for like acondiment of stuff if you make
sauces with them.
And I tried to uh just eat itraw and it was like something

(41:28):
where it's been like salted thehell out of a marinated in it
and it's not that tasty and Ifelt like I needed to like drink
like a gallon of water per hourjust to like quench my thirst
and it still wouldn't go away.
So that was be careful of thosethey looked a little bit foul
too it's I don't know it wasweird.
It was not what I was I washoping it'd just be like a
different type of hard boiledegg but I don't know what they

(41:50):
did to it but that thing was uhextremely salty it's like it was
like kind of like solidified soysauce I should in terms of
saltiness not at all in flavor Idon't really know why I said
that but that was interesting.
Anywho went to the zoo that wasfun oh yeah the baby elephants
were adorable they're likeplaying running around like

(42:12):
chasing each other hiding behindtheir mom tripping up they're
still clumsy I think like Ithink I've seen stuff where like
baby elephants it's like theygotta be a few years old before
they figure out how to likelearn how to use their trunk or
develop the muscles and theylike the first few years it just
really flops around and theydon't know how to use that as
like a limb yet so it's kind offun to watch them and they just
trip up and eat shit but they'readorable I want a baby elephant

(42:34):
or like an elephant reserve youknow I want them to have some
homies too.
But that'd be fun if you likeseeing those videos of them like
doing some rescue elephantswhere they got the baby elephant
inside or like the single Ithink the same guy with like a
buffalo there's I think there'sone thing too where this guy had
this buffalo he like modded outhis car to have his buffalo just
ride in it.
I think there's something wherethey had like he's getting in

(42:56):
trouble by like you know thepopo or someone like I mean I
guess probably reasonably likethe safety of your car when you
got a convertible drop top youknow maybe bag no roof because
you got the damn buffalo just inthe passenger sheet it's
probably you know a littlehazardous driving but it's kind
of sick I will say but fromthere hung out I think we just

(43:21):
got dinner and then my mom didgo back home and I spent another
night in the hotel.
And that night wait actually noit was the night before it was
the first night I got to um waitwas it the first night?
Yes no it was it was the firstnight the night after I left
Colorado when I first got to Omabefore I went to the zoo I was

(43:43):
like I still got this cigar Ishould try to smoke a cigar you
know I've said now I don't gotshit to do for the night um I'm
gonna try to smoke this and thenI was like went out to the
parking lot to do it.
Uh and luckily for me ithappened to be like the Nebraska
Little League or the WorldSeries for Little League
happened to be in Nebraska thatyear so there's less people at

(44:04):
the hotel for that and I waslike just sitting in the parking
lot trying to spark up thiscigar and this guy's like you
want this free folding chair andhe's like we're not gonna use it
we just got it for the games I'mlike all right it's fixed.
So I was just sitting by myselfin this empty Nebraska hotel
parking lot smoking my firstcigar and it was interesting

(44:25):
nothing too much.
I mean it was pretty nice forsome stars but pretty quickly I
was just dry heaving in thisparking lot um and it's like
what the hell is going on?
And I was like googling it and Iguess yeah if there's like a lot
of nicotine in it especially ifyou've never had any nicotine
where you should probably havesomething like sugary with it or
something you can easily youknow I mean I don't know if it's

(44:47):
not really like poisoning butlike you just it was it I don't
know it hurt because like you'rejust I didn't actually throw up
but like I was trying to like Iwas just like dry heaving like
like I couldn't help it.
I'm just like just laying on theground just parking like and
like I'm like what the fuck isgoing on with the this cigar
just laying on the ground nextto me is probably pretty sad

(45:08):
looking.
Luckily no one was hopefully noone was gonna watch it there
probably could have been peoplein their hotel rooms looking
down like what the fuck is wrongwith this dude but or maybe they
knew maybe they knew I was justthe absolute cigar noob and that
I was going through it and I waslike no more of this.
I think I did try a little bitmore and then get was like
keeping some more and then Ijust called and I'm like that's

(45:30):
a wrap.
Dug up uh one of my leftovercucumber lime gander Gatorades,
one of the signatures and drankthe item I think eventually felt
better but that's kind of whathas happened with just taking
that goddamn zin.
I was like sitting there andit's like pretty quickly it's
like oh get in the real headrush and I'm like okay this is
too much breaks I'm gonna yikand it was like trying to hang

(45:52):
on they're like okay I gottasplit this out at this point.
I don't really want to be justyou know gagging in my damn
living room on the couch.
So had to hit ejectunfortunately haven't built up
for that um but after that nightor the next day it was this by
the time after the zoo like mythroat had still been a little

(46:12):
sore and I was still figuring itwas the uh um just the hiking at
altitude up to Pike's peak anddown and I didn't think too much
of it and the cigar thatprobably wasn't that great on a
sore throat and the next day Idon't I think it felt fine
during the day although I thinkit just had like the taste of
the smoke that felt like it waslike stained in my mouth and in

(46:33):
my throat and it just didn'tfeel that great great especially
by the evening when I was likeback alone in the hotel room I
was like I feel like my throatis just like stained with that
and it hurts even worse.
But also like I felt like I kindof wanted like to smoke again so
I was like that's just kind ofscary although luckily I've not
had similar nicotine cravings ofthat I don't know if that's what
that was but I felt like I kindof wanted more and I was like I

(46:55):
feel like shit and the fact thatI want more is kind of scary um
but nothing nothing really moredeveloped that night I just
didn't feel that great and Iwent to bed I was gonna get up
early have some hotel breakfastand try to get on the road so
I'd get back home finally at adecent hour.
But I think it's the alarm for11 no no no no like 6 a.m and I

(47:19):
woke up at like 11 a.m and Ifelt like horrible I maybe woke
up for the 6 a.m alarm and it'slike like kind of rolled over
and like hit snooze and then Iwoke up at like 11 because the
hotel like the front desk wascalling and asked me when you're
gonna check out because I don'tknow if I was late but I think
it was close or there'ssomething maybe it was late and
I just like felt like a trainhad hit me and I I was not

(47:40):
feeling good.
I was like just felt horrible Ididn't I didn't know what was
going on and I like just finallyjumped out of bed felt like I
could fall back asleep and goteverything packed up packed up I
was bringing some plants I hadto do also the turtle eggs my my
clothes and stuff packed up thecar checked out and started
going the last leg of the roadgot back in the interstate but

(48:03):
then like after five minutes Ihad to like pull over the first
rest stop because like I wasactually starting to fall asleep
at the wheel like I could feelit I was like wanting to close
my eyes and I was like I feellike I could it's like when
you're in class you know youstart like going like that.
That's kind of like what I feltlike was going on behind the
wheels but I just pulled over atsome rest stop and just got I
think maybe a Gatorade and maybesome soda and drank that and

(48:26):
like closed my eyes for a littlebit.
But I it did help another Idon't know how long I was there
I could have been there an hour.
I don't think so I think it wasmore like probably 10-20 minutes
and try to like slap myselfsilly but I think what
eventually ended up happeningwas I just I I don't know what I
felt.
Normally when I'm like tired inthe car I'll blast like the cold
air I like blast the cold airand turn on the sea heater on my

(48:46):
back but like have cold airhitting my face that's a little
bit more comfortable keeps youawake pro tip although I have
lots of other stuff I normallynormally what I do is I'm gonna
have caffeine pills in the car.
I also have this like run gumcaffeine gum because I feel like
when it soaks through your mouthit hits you quicker if I'm like
not feeling like super alert I'mlike I'll pop some caffeine gum.
I've now also since added someuh nicotine gum because that

(49:08):
does kind of also perk you up alittle bit but at this point I
was just I don't know what to dolike when you're not feeling
good your temperature feels likeall over the place like you feel
hot when you're cold and coldwhen you're hot I think I was
probably hot and I was likebundled up in a hoodie but I was
feeling cold and like blastingthe warm air in the car and I

(49:29):
was just like trying to I thinkI got to I don't know several
just random gas stations in themiddle of like the nowhere in
the Midwest.
There's one was like I couldn'tfigure out how to pump gas I
don't even know if I could butall the other ones that I had
actual gas stations I would likeget a monster and like chug it
every like two hours which isprobably not great for me in

(49:51):
this state and but yeah this onegas station pulled in the middle
of nowhere it was just likepumps in the middle of this
cornfield like right next to itlike a lot and like there was
like I couldn't figure out thedisplay on this like pump thing
I don't know if it's a legitpump that you could use.
It had it turned up on likeGoogle it's like a station but I
couldn't figure out I was likesussed out I was like I don't

(50:11):
know where I am I'm just in themiddle of I'm like tweaking out
it's like a 90 degrees and I'mlike bundled up in like hoodies
and sweats like shivering eventhough I'm probably like a
hundred degrees trying to likelook at this pump that I was
like so bizarre because therewas like no one there.
There's just like these pumpsbut no like station and I didn't
know I couldn't figure out likeit was not at all like there was

(50:34):
like an easy like credit carddisplay thing and I was probably
just like a little bit delirioustoo to add all that to boot and
eventually just skirted out ofthere and found another one
later down the road.
But eventually got home and Iwas like yeah Ma I don't feel so
good and then she gave me aCOVID test.
Sure enough I had it so then Igot exiled to the bedroom and

(50:54):
just locked in there.
I I felt a little bit bad Ididn't even like cross my mind I
had COVID till I like shebrought the test.
I think I was just like so outof it getting there and it was
like just trying to like getsomewhere and it's like the
morning I was just likescrambling oh shit I'm like not
really thinking through how sickI was feeling or even driving.
I was trying to like get homeand then she like freaked out I

(51:18):
mean naturally I mean I thinkthis is the point where like
COVID was still a little bitspooky and she's worried about
getting it or my dad getting it.
So then I was just you knowlocked in the the room and they
were all wearing masks and whodrop food outside my door but
luckily no one got it.
I was just locked in the roomfor like two weeks um it was a
vibe.
Although the girl seen that Iwas pissed because I hadn't seen

(51:41):
her in a while and I kinda I wasgoing this little trip and then
I just got home but I had COVIDso I think she wanted to see me
that that was a vibe kill so Iit was kind of unfortunate but
made the most of it I got boredjust sitting in the room for
like 10 days or whatever thatwas I think they made me go um

(52:03):
in between trying to eat foodthat I couldn't taste.
Luckily didn't have like the badCOVID I think especially the
people that got it like you knowthe real one of the the OG drops
of COVID were like actually likereally fucked up like your your
taste bud nerves and like Idon't I think there's some
people that I heard like a fewyears after like COVID first
drop that got it and like stillhadn't gotten their taste and

(52:23):
that sounds awful like if youjust like years without not
being able to taste your food.
I guess you know be good forgetting ready for the runway if
food doesn't even taste good.
But that would just suck likenot being able to enjoy your
food.
But part of that time I was umended up tree shopping I mean I
kind of got into keeping caretaking care of trees during the

(52:44):
the pandemic when I was takingcare of turtles too and just
ordering exotic plants and treesand planting them watching them
grow.
But I don't really know how thatstarted this this next
inspiration I just ended upordering like a shit ton of
trees and plotting where I wasgoing to plant them in the yard
like looking out the windowtrying to like be like there's a

(53:06):
spot I can put a tree in mostthese things for like an Etsy.
I don't know by so much stuff IEtsy seemed to have a good tree
supply uh at least for a varietyand eventually trees just
started showing up and I wasfinally got out of the the
bedroom they finally cracked theseal let me go roam free then I

(53:26):
just went got the shovel ranoutside started digging holes
and planting the trees andtotally filled up the yard.
I guess I also planted the thetrees I harvested from Pike's
Peak.
That was fun.
And totally got a variety oftrees in the yard so we got kind
of like an arboretum.
I think the first few years theywere kind of I don't know I

(53:47):
don't know if they were theyweren't pissed but I don't know
if they're super jazzed becauselike I was totally the yard
looked a little bit red and Ibecause I like put a bunch of
like fence around all these likesapling trees and buckets so you
could like fill them up and theyjust like slowly trickle because
that waters them a little bitbetter than if you just dump a
bunch of water at once forwhatever reason I think it just
maybe it's more slowly absorbedand the tree can get more.

(54:09):
And then you do need to put thefence because we got so many
deer in the yard that justtotally mow down stuff if you
don't like it's good luck toanything surviving if you don't.
And there's even stuff they'renot theoretically don't eat
they're just like curiousmunchers that are grazing on
anything.
Like there were some maples thatwe planted a few years before
and it did survive but mygrandpa's like yeah they want

(54:32):
they'll leave it alone and thenlike within a week it was like
already like all the brancheswere just chewed off so I
there's like two little leavesand I like it put a fence around
it and there's like those twolittle leaves hung around but
nothing else grew so I was notthat optimistic but it's it's
kicking still so it survived itendured getting just totally
mowed down by these these hungrydeer but totally you know

(54:56):
transferred them to the yardfilled it with all sorts of
stuff researched all the sortsof trees and learned like which
things were like we're just liketrying to figure out I guess it
ended up being more of a projectthan I thought like it wasn't
just totally willy-nilly pickingtrees I kind of you know did
some research I mean I hadnothing else to do at that time
I mean it was like I was kind ofin between school and grad

(55:16):
school and like nothing reallyto do and just locking the room
I didn't even have like the Xboxin that room like no TV so it
was kind of it was unfortunate.
Maybe I couldn't have done thatlike had the TV brought up or
something to pass the time.
But um I tried to figure outlike first of all like which
one's gonna survive theseMidwest winters.
That's tough.
Not everything does there's lotsof cool stuff that doesn't and

(55:38):
then like finding like is thereone like shade or sun more and
kind of eventually you knowtrying to find I didn't I kind
of want to just you know not abunch of the same stuff so
they're all kind of like uniquetrees.
Like the stuff that's there isall pretty like uniform.
I mean there's a variety of likeevergreens and maples but just
kind of that maybe some likecrab apples that kind of bloom
that are fun.
But I was like I want some youknow I want that shit that ain't

(55:59):
even on the menu for treesaround here.
And so I got some um this islike a ginkgo some there is some
magnolia's are very pretty butmost of them are like in warmer
weather stuff or like fairerfair weather more mild climates
there are some that I found thatsurvive a harsh winter a variety
of some other like evergreenslike birch and some different

(56:23):
weeping willows that was fun tofind and one thing I would
really like is like Japanesemaples but they don't really
make it in good like realwinters.
But there are Korean maples thatdo but they're like kind of
uglier they're not as pretty asa Japanese maple they're kind of
like more like a shrub with likemaple looking leaves but I I
figured out there's a thingcalled actually I don't know I

(56:46):
think I just call them I don'tthink they're called like
Japorean or Koranese Koranese.
That sounds more like Islamicbut it's like a hybrid between
the two where it looks a littlebit more pretty like a Japanese
but it's got the the coldhardiness from the the Korean
and they throw in the winter soI found one of those to plant.
The craziest thing though theyplanted I guess I planted it the

(57:07):
year before I've been growingthese Dawn Redwoods which it's
like one of the three redwoodsbecause there's like the the
sequoia trees then there's thecoast redwood which are like
even taller but skinny they'renot as gritty and I think
there's then these the DawnRedwood which they maybe thought
was only a fossil tree for awhile because they saw it in the

(57:28):
record but then they likerediscovered like live ones in
like Asia and they kind ofspread from there since but
they're pretty cool.
They get like get really hugeand the thing is they're like
one of like a few um deciduousconifers I think is what the
term is something like needlythat drops his needles.
The other one is like a baldcypress which I think is more in
the south and there's also maybelike I feel like I've heard

(57:49):
about like some in the PNW likelarches is that a word something
that turns yellow and drops theneedles but I got a few of these
done redwoods and be growing inthe basement and eventually just
put one outside because it wasgetting kind of big and not
maybe just I don't know I didn'treally know I was just kind of I
like to put stuff outside andsee when it can grow big if it

(58:11):
can survive in the climatebecause it was kind of more fun
to watch it really take off.
And I found like a nice spot inthe air that seems sunny and
kind of in the middle and Idon't know the the spot must
have been like perfect in therefor like sun and water and
whatnot.
Maybe it's a low spot so extrawater gets there but this thing
is like totally taken off in afew years.
It's like in like five yearslike like 20 feet tall and like
thick just from something thatwas like knee height.

(58:32):
So it's pretty cool and it's funto watch it like every year see
how much bigger it's gotten andall that and especially all the
other trees they're all prettylike just little teeny cute
little saplings on the plantwith them that have kind of
gotten more mature looking theginkgo too is cool.
They got kind of unique leavesalthough they're a little bit
more common I feel like they'rekind of all around and I think

(58:53):
they're like a common city tree.
But they got kind of like uniqueleaves um I think they're the
tree that they say that theysmell like cum or something I've
definitely run past some trees Iremember in California and just
like some areas I'm like that'sdoes that smell what I think it
smells like that's a verydistinct smell to be just
prominently in the air but thenI think it makes sense.

(59:15):
I think I looked this cameacross came to this like uh
conclusion though because I gavemy grandma one of these trees
and she was like reading aboutit.
I've kind of given her someplant stuff and she's kind of
also gotten into it.
I guess I've shared some randomhobbies with some of my family
gotten admitted some randomthings.
My mom's gotten pretty into theturtles thanks to me or at least
I hope so I hope she has a hatebut she smells it good and she's

(59:35):
got a career in Hollywood if shedoesn't like them.
So I guess that's a one also butthen my grandma's reading about
them and I don't know if it'sthe males or the females at some
time of year when they're tryingto bloom they smell horrible
that smells like rotten bodiesand vomit or something she was
saying.
I was kind of Googling it andsaw that too and maybe some
smell like cum or something Idon't know.
I haven't had that experienceyet with these ones are still

(59:56):
pretty little but like a coollike I think they're called
maidenhair trees I really don'tknow why.
And they said because of theshape of the leaves.
It's kind of like a kind of likeclovery, but just like uh one
petal of a clover.
If that makes sense.
I don't know if that's superaccurate.
It's got a little bit more oflike a curve to it though.
Like an arc.
But I don't think other stuffhas that leaf.

(01:00:17):
I mean, there's probablysomething though.
When I'm looking at trees, Ifeel like that's definitely a
giveaway.
If I were like an arborist,that'd be kind of fun.
I would like to know, like be apro at like telling what kind of
tree is what.
That's kind of fun.
I mean, I can know I know avariety of things, but by no
means professional.
Would like to know just though,even like the general things,

(01:00:37):
how you know like a tree'shealthier what to trim up on a
thing to keep it thriving so itcan really, you know, get real
tall and grow for years.
I don't think yeah, I don't knowwhich ones of those ginkgos are
really starting to stink at whatpoint, but we'll see.
Hopefully.
Hopefully it's a while, andhopefully it's not too bad.
But they're pretty cool becauseI think they turn like bright

(01:01:00):
yellow in the in the fall.
I think I've seen videos or likepictures of this somewhere in
China or Asia, like some bigtemple built around this giant
ginkgo that like in the fallturns like super like gorgeous
gold and like raining, just likeyellow leaves everywhere.
It's like that'd be sick.
I kind of want to I'll I'll bedown to live in a ginkgo temple
like that, where you got likesome big beautiful tree that

(01:01:20):
just you know changes colors atthe right time of year.
But that's kind of been the thedevelopment of the uh Arboretum
in the yard and things mostlyI've been kicking, I think a
few.
Most of the trees that I uhbrought over from Colorado
didn't make it, except this onethat was the biggest one.

(01:01:41):
And I thought that maybe it'd beless likely because it's kind of
harder to get those up nicely.
And might once they getestablished, they maybe need a
little bit more to keep going.
But I I think I did a goodenough job on extracting that
one where it sustained itself,and it seems to still be
kicking.
I think there's maybe a fewthings that needed to replace.
But we'll see.
It's been it's fun to check backevery year when I visit and see

(01:02:04):
how things have grown and reallyfilled in.
It's now it was pretty cool.
I mean, the yard was prettybefore, but now it's even more
got even more variety anddiversity.
You know, we've got that DERyard, it's pretty fun.
There's all sorts of differentcolors, and I think as the they
grow and then in the spring andfall will be really colorful
when you have like all theseextra varieties of colors and
flowers.
So I'm kind of hype for that.

(01:02:25):
Although I actually have noidea.
That could still be like 10years from now.
So hopefully, I don't know.
Hopefully it's all still heldtogether by then.
It's all intact, nothing petersout.
I mean, I don't even know.
Who knows what climate change isgoing to happen?
Maybe it's gonna turn to infernothere, or maybe it'll like all
of a sudden go 180 and we'llhave like uh absolute zero ice

(01:02:47):
age and things will just totallyfreeze off.
Tough to say.
I think it's like the past fewwinters have kind of been back
and forth.
There's one where it's likehardly a winter, then a normal
one.
But I feel like before that it'slike an extra cold one.
So I don't know.
What's the farmer's almond X saythis year?
What the hell even is a farmer'salmond act?
Like who what is it just like ais it like a horoscope for for

(01:03:09):
weather?
Or is it like actually ascientific thing?
Like, how does that come about?
Like, is it I feel like theimpression I got as a kid is
like some like historical bookwhere it just like written the
future of weather and what it'llbe, but is it just like is it
like a forecast for the yearbased on like recent ones?
Like do they like is it likeactively updated for the year
and then they put it out?
Or how's that work?

(01:03:29):
I don't know.
That's a good question.
Because I know like I'd hearabout that when I was a kid or
something, like they'd betalking about on the radio, like
the farmer's almanac predictsthis.
But I was like, is that like isthat I've in my head it was
something like the Azteccalendar, like something like
totally like vague and outthere, but is it something
that's got some more truth toit?
I don't know.

(01:03:50):
But it'll be interesting to seewhether it keeps getting spicy.
Not really in a good way.
At least I don't know.
Maybe it's El Niño or La Niña, Idon't know.
I forget what that each onemeans.
Although I think it meansdifferent things everywhere.
Like you might be in your reallygetting that whap somewhere, but
you get extra dry somewhereelse.

(01:04:11):
So I don't even think it's likea universal rule.
Like it's not like La Niñaalways got that whap for
everyone.
Sometimes it's El Niño.
So weather's crazy.
It'd be kind of cool to know, bea weatherman, know all of that.
Lots of stuff that'd be cool.
Honestly.
Just knowing everything, that'dbe kind of sick.

(01:04:32):
But we'll see, we'll see, we'llsee.
Maybe it'll get warmer and I canI mean I don't think there's
anything that's like I don'tthink many trees are like stuff
where it's can't be like toowarm.
Unlike, okay, lots of stuffcould be too warm, but I mean
like not warm like too warm of awinner, I guess more what I'm
saying.
Because I don't think it's gonnabe turned into like Arizona or

(01:04:54):
Cali Desert in the Midwest soon,at least hopefully not.
Maybe it'd be the Dust Bowlagain.
What was the Dust Bowl?
What made that like what stoppedthe Dust Bowl?
Like who who stopped that titlerun?
Is that like was it was was itlike uh just like a few time
thing, or is it like did we Idon't know how did we stop that

(01:05:14):
or why was that like you justsee these like whole big you
know dust booms just and likethe history books in high
school?
But I don't I don't know whatthe hell like where'd that come
from?
Was there like I met was it justlike a crazy year where the dust
went crazy off, or was it like aa sustained thing?
Was it was it something we did?

(01:05:36):
Did we mess up?
Did we piss off nature?
And I don't know.
Was it like a drought periodthat made it really dusty and
something?
Is it?
I don't know.
I ain't been I mean maybe I'vebeen to Dust Bowl area.
I don't know where thathappened.
I got so many questions nowabout almanacs and dust bowls
and all that.
So wow, now I'm gonna know allthis stuff.

(01:05:59):
What happened to the dust bowls?
Where did they go?
I've seen dust dust devils thatwe call them.
That's always kind of like fun.
I mean, I think those is therebig ones.
I know they're like, I feel likeat baseball games like kids used
to see little mini dusttornadoes and stuff like that.
But I feel like I've seen biggerones.
I saw one recently when I wasdriving somewhere in like North
Dakota.
I feel like I saw a bunch ofthem.

(01:06:20):
This is the first time that I'vedriven like in like I-94 in
North Dakota.
And I didn't realize I had somany like oil fields or like oil
oil pumps.
I'm like, dang, I feel like I'min Texas.
That's kind of fun to see.
And there's some of the Badlandsthere.
Is that where there's like TeddyRoosevelt Park?
Is that what's in North Dakota?
I don't know.
I feel like we drove throughSouth Dakota and it's pretty
boring.
You see like a snippet of theBadlands, I'm like, oh, it looks

(01:06:41):
pretty cool.
But on an I-90 down there, youonly see like a tiny bit.
You just get like a sneak peek,you know, really blue balls.
You gotta see more of it.
And on I-94 and North Dakota,that was cool.
But yeah, we've we've covered alot of ground today.
I don't know.
It's fun though to get outthere, see all that's out there

(01:07:02):
in the US.
You gotta say, not to glaze thestates too much, but it is fun
to drive really across the US.
There's like a whole widevariety of pretty things to see
and like all different sorts ofshit that I feel like you know,
you don't necessarily realizeyou don't got it can be you know
uncultured as the Europeans orwhatever like to say.
You don't gotta even leave thedamn country to see so much

(01:07:25):
different shit, which is prettycool.
I feel like it's lucky to haveall that.
But gotta get out there and seeit, you know, enjoy the world,
seize the day, carpe diem.
Do carpe sees stuff, is thatwhat they call them?
Or carp carp fish?
It fucks me up that goldfish arecarp.

(01:07:46):
And same with koi.
Like, how are these prettythings?
But that's a story for anotherday.
But wait, like it doesn't evenmake sense.
They got like a million dollarone, and then the rest of them
are just like ugly and invasive.
Like it'd be kind of sick if theinvasive ones were just like the
the pretty gold ones, you know?
Like if koi fish were invasive,I'd like I'd be cooler than just

(01:08:08):
like the ugly brown carp thatjust take over everything, are
kind of gross looking.
But why couldn't it be thepretty ones?
Like, come on.
Pretty privilege, or but that'slike reverse.
They don't let the I don't know.
I don't quite know how thatmeant out.
But it's kind of interestingthey're related.
We'll talk about that, yeah, ata different time because we're
we're running out of time.

(01:08:29):
But it's been a solid episode.
Thank you all for tuning in andhanging out with your boy.
We've definitely hatched outsome important topics.
I've been enjoying it, and hopeyou are too.
Hope you've been blessed bythese convos again and again,
and hope you continue to keepcoming back for our more, which
there'll be many of gotta stayfocused, stay locked in on the
grind, keep, you know, keep thisyep going, get better at it.

(01:08:51):
It's been fun.
I'm sure it's been ass.
Hopefully, you know, look lookback on this like this is some
absolute horse shit.
But because I got got real nicewith it, we'll see, we'll see.
Time will tell.
But until then, we will catchyou next time.
And yeah.
Stay frosty or whatever.
Trying to think of a cool, coolthing to say.

(01:09:12):
That wasn't it.
But for now, peace peace.