January 21, 2025 • 24 mins
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Ep #80 - What do we do when systems fail us? We lean on each other in community. Amidst the noise during this transition in power, let's pause and reflect on the power of community to rise up, make “good trouble,” and create real change.
From neighbors organizing mutual aid to therapists offering pro bono support during the LA wildfires, this is a love letter to the ways we show up for each other when it matters most.
Inspired by John Lewis, Dr. Lorgia García Peña, and other changemakers, their wisdom shows us how connection and solidarity can be forms of quiet rebellion. Whether it’s amplifying grassroots efforts, questioning what we’ve been taught to accept as normal, or finding small ways to support those around us, community is how we push forward together.
Let's march forward full of hope with practical ideas for building stronger, more connected communities—because when we come together, there’s no limit to what we can do.
To get the full show notes, and an episode transcript, go to PauletteErato.com/shownotes. This is episode 80.
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Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
Buen día, mi gente, and welcometo La Vida Más Chévere The only
Spanglish podcast for childfreeLatinas y Latines, helping us
liberate ourselves from thetoxic cultural brainwashing we
all grew up with, so that we candesign our best lives instead.
I'm your host andresident childfree
Latina, Paulette Erato.
(00:24):
Before we get into it,I apologize if my voice
sounds a bit rough.
The air quality here inLA right now is really
bad, so I sound like this.
Last episode, I encouraged youto create noise, to get loud.
In contrast, here's a softerapproach to rebellion.
(00:45):
One of the open secrets todesigning your best life
is creating a communitywhere you feel supported.
We're all part of severalgroups, whether we
recognize them or not.
Some are intentional, likea professional development
group, Toastmasters, a tradeorganization, your union.
Others are circumstantial,like your work colleagues,
(01:06):
or the neighborhood HOA.
But a lot of them, we haveto seek out ourselves.
I developed the LatinasIn Podcasting community
because I didn't have aspace for that already.
So I had to build whatit was I was missing.
And in fact, yesterday, wecelebrated MLK Day together,
sharing coffee over Zoom,so we could be distracted
(01:27):
by what was going on in D.
C.
Like I mentioned last episode,I talked about the roadmap for
rebellion, how joy is an act ofrebellion, how using the power
of your voice is a rebellion.
But I get, that might be a bitmuch for some people right now.
Maybe you're not ready to playyour instrument in the band.
(01:48):
I understand.
We live in a capitalisticpatriarchal society and
there can be consequences forgoing against the status quo.
So here's anotheroption for all of us.
Community is also a form ofrebellion, especially under
capitalism, which doesn't wantus to bond with each other.
(02:09):
It wants us to competeagainst one another.
Aye.
I love this quote fromGiselle Phelps that she
put on Threads in responseto what's happening in L.
A.
Giselle is a former TV reporterturned publicist and thought
leader, and this is what shewrote, quote, "The way we're
all expected to continueperforming capitalism in the
face of death and destructionshould give everyone pause.
(02:33):
It's time to start questioningwhat you've been conditioned
to accept as normal." End quote.
Sound familiar?
As you know, helping youdecondition from what you've
always accepted as normal ismy favorite activity and the
entire purpose of this podcast.
You see, it's really difficultto design your vida más
chévere if you haven't yetopened your eyes and woken
(02:54):
up to the many, many waysin which capitalism and the
patriarchy have you shackled.
And that's what mycommunity is here for, the
community for this podcast.
So thank you, as a listener, forbeing a crucial part of that.
Community as Rebellion isalso the name of a book by Dr.
Lorgia García Peña, a professorof Latinx studies at Princeton.
(03:18):
I'm recording this before I getmy copy of her book, but let
me read you the description.
Quote, "Weaving personalnarrative with political
analysis, Community asRebellion offers a meditation
on creating liberatory spacesfor students and faculty
of color within academia.
Much like other scholars ofcolor, Lorgia García Peña
has struggled against thecolonizing, racializing,
(03:40):
classist, and unequal structuresthat perpetuate systemic
violence within universities.
Through personal experiencesand analytical reflections,
the author invites readers, inparticular Black, Indigenous,
Latinx, and Asian women,to engage in liberatory
practices of boycott.
Abolition and radical communitybuilding to combat the
(04:02):
academic world's tokenizingand exploitive structures."
End quote.
Dr.
García Peña's experienceswithin academia are an example
of the way in which oursociety tends to hurt what it
considers its weakest members.
The incoming administrationseems to have a real hard
on for doing this andcontinuing this practice.
(04:24):
John Lewis coined thephrase, Good Trouble.
And since it's the day after wecelebrate the late, great Martin
Luther King's legacy, let's talkabout creating good trouble.
I'm going to read you thisarticle written by Paulette
Beete, and I promise I didnot know her name when I found
this, which she wrote for theNational Endowment for the Arts.
(04:44):
Quote, "It is difficult tohear the phrase, good trouble,
and not instantly think ofthe late civil rights leader
and Georgia Congressman, JohnLewis, for whom the phrase
was a type of battle cry.
In numerous interviews, Lewisrecounted how he came to adopt
the phrase as a way to talkabout his Civil Rights work.
He recalled how his motheroften instructed him to stay
(05:06):
out of the way, stay out oftrouble, which was not an
unusual stance for a mothertrying to raise a young black
boy in the American Southduring the mid 20th century.
Meeting the Reverend Dr.
Martin Luther King Jr.
as a teenager, however,taught Lewis that sometimes
the only way to bring changewas by getting in trouble.
As the Congressman told theBates College graduating class
(05:28):
of 2016, that introduction toKing 'inspired me to stand up,
to speak up, and speak out.
And I got in the way.
I got in trouble.
Good trouble.
Necessary trouble.'" End quote.
Necessary trouble.
That's what sticks with me.
As a grown woman, a mouthyand childfree Latina, I am
(05:49):
inconvenient to the patriarchy.
I'm of no use to them because Irefuse to procreate or shut up.
I love that for me.
And because I advocate for youto do the same, I'm not winning
any brownie points with them.
That's fine.
They've got plenty ofpick me's to choose from.
I'm grown.
I'm urging you to create goodand necessary trouble, whether
(06:12):
that's by playing your voiceor by embracing your community.
Cool.
So how do we do that?
Let's talk about whatcommunity can look like.
In case you don't know, I wasborn and raised in Los Angeles.
Watching the destruction tearthrough LA in the last few weeks
has paralyzed a lot of us, evenif we weren't directly affected.
(06:34):
And it turns out that's anabsolutely normal feeling.
The collective grief aswe witness the devastation
isn't comfortable.
But it is real.
This communal anguish hasonly been made worse by the
online armchair experts or theempty headed pundits spreading
abject lies about what'shappening here on the ground.
(06:56):
Not very community-mindedof our fellow Americans.
It's part of theplaybook, though.
Othering us Californiansstrips us of humanity.
And makes it easier to turnus into objects of ridicule.
If victims are reduced to simplya statistic, or dismissed as
deserving of their plight,it's easier to either ignore
(07:16):
them, or worse, scapegoatthem for larger problems.
The fires have been said bythe stupidest among us to
be caused by wokeness, or D.
E.
I.
As opposed to the glaringlyobvious truth we all
know, climate change.
But hey, now that theSupreme Court said we
(07:37):
can sue oil companies forthat, it should be okay!
How often have we seen thesame framework at play in
reporting the atrocitiesin Gaza or Ukraine?
In the wake of the floatingisland of garbage comments
last fall, millions of PuertoRicans banded together to
reject this characterization.
(07:58):
And suddenly, the internetwas flooded with support from
all corners of the world.
It's kind of like what's goingon in Los Angeles right now.
A very smart man oncetold us that Mexico
doesn't send their best.
No.
Mexican firemen volunteeredtheir elite skills instead.
So, a huge shout out toMexico and Canada and all our
(08:21):
neighboring states and beyondwho see through the bullshit
that's being reported andhave offered support instead.
That's humanity, that's courage.
That's how a communityis supposed to operate.
This support should have beencoming from our own people,
our own fellow Americans.
(08:42):
All of our news storiesshould be urging people
to help this criticalpart of what is supposed
to be the United States.
Instead of telling us it's ourfault, they could be helping
this economy they all depend on.
But they decided to bite thehand that feeds them instead.
Alrighty then.
(09:03):
A community of helpers iswhat I want to be a part of.
You remember that Mr.
Rogers quote, don't you?
He said his mom would tellhim, "Look for the helpers.
You'll always findpeople who are helping."
That's community.
And it's times like this,not just these natural
disasters, but livingunder this administration,
(09:24):
when community becomesof the utmost importance.
Being able to lean on yourneighbors, your friends,
anyone during this timeis going to be invaluable.
For people who don't have asupport network like that, it's
going to make an unfathomablydifficult time that much harder.
(09:45):
If you're one of the LAresidents who have been
displaced or need support,please check out the show
notes for a list of availableresources that will be
continuously updated.
The disaster in LA has shownus what the power of community
looks like, how localshave mobilized to provide
aid where the governmentcouldn't yet or won't.
(10:05):
From local restaurants andChef José Andrés serving the
fire crews and the displacedcitizens to the donation centers
overwhelmed by volunteers,to the wave of support from
the crews sent from Canada,from Mexico and beyond,
we've got this taking care ofour fellow humans mentality
here, and it's amazing.
(10:26):
For those of us carrying thatgrief, sometimes the best way to
deal with it is through action.
One of the best things youcan do to calm your nerves
is direct that energyinto doing something.
Donating money, goods,or even your time is an
(10:46):
excellent use of that energy.
And mutual aid organizationscan always use assistance.
And please keep that inmind, as my friend Sylvia
said, once the news crews aregone next month, and there's
no longer a daily story,people will still need help.
But what about ourimmediate communities?
You don't have to haveundergone a disaster in order
(11:08):
to get to know your neighbors.
Do you know their names?
Now is a good as time asany to connect with them.
Because at the end of the day,all we have is each other.
What are other ways to createcommunity in this modern
and often isolating world?
I mentioned that I built, ambuilding, Latinas In Podcasting
(11:31):
because of what I perceivedas a hole I need it filled.
But creating and nurturinga community takes time,
effort, and lots of patience.
Bonds aren't formed overnight,so you can't expect a
community to simply springup where it's planted.
It has to be tended to,like any garden, like
(11:51):
anything worth growing.
So, if you start now, imaginewhere you can be in six months.
Because, trust me bro, insix months, we're still
gonna need that support.
We all will.
Pour into the communitiesyou have currently.
(12:11):
But what if you're moreof a joiner than a leader?
Hey, that's okay too.
Sometimes we need models ofbehavior before we can see
ourselves in those roles.
Another reason this podcastexists, to provide you
with these very examples.
So look around and askyourself, what can I join?
What do I wantmore of in my life?
(12:34):
What do I have the space for?
It might look like a runningclub, a book club, a group of
people with tools, buildinga Habitat for Humanity house,
or even an online childfreespace where you can vent about
the bingos you hear and learnsassy retorts to all of them.
If you're thinking, butPaulette, my interests are
very niche, I'd say bet.
(12:55):
Let me tell you a storyof an imaginary friend
we'll call Valentina.
Valentina wanted to find anunderwater basket weaving group
that met on the 14th Sundayof the year and hosted bake
sales for orphaned otters.
Valentina very clearlyhas very niche interests
and that's great.
She's a unique and complicatedhuman just like the rest of us.
(13:18):
But she also doesn't seek tobe all things to all people,
and she eventually recognizedthat all potential communities
may not offer her 100 percentof what she needs in every way.
This is why you need and shouldseek out multiple, maybe even
overlapping, communities.
Valentina discoveredthat was the case for
(13:40):
her, so what did she do?
She found her underwaterweaving group, they had their
own thing, and then she founda separate orphaned otter
group that did its own thing.
And she became the commonlink between the two.
The one who could bridgethem together for anyone else
looking to expand either theirweaving or ottering skills.
(14:00):
And then on the 14th Sundayof the year, the orphaned
otters were able to rely onthe underwater basket weavers
to assist in a donation drive.
Magically, she helped improvetwo distinct communities
that are both dear to her.
By doing what?
Simply joining.
Showing up.
(14:21):
Isn't that amazing?
I realize this is a ridiculousexample, but I think you get it.
You hold multitudes withinyou, but you can explore
separate pieces of yourselfone at a time and bring them
together in a new way foryou, while also creating,
or joining, or becoming partof a larger support system.
(14:41):
That's just one way to createcommunity, to be in community.
As adults, it becomes harderto make friends because
we're not thrust into sharedcircumstances the same way
we were in kindergarten, orin college, or even during
natural disasters, very often.
We usually have tocreate that on our own
and that can be scary.
(15:03):
But I'd be more concernedwith loneliness right now
than the fear of puttingyourself out there.
And I realize thatit doesn't come easy.
Over the last six months,Ryan and I have become part
of a pickleball community.
We have friends we playpickup games with outside
of our weekly lessons.
They might be listeningto this episode.
How did that happen?
(15:23):
We just had to show upand see if we liked it.
Turns out we did, and we'veeven gotten better at this
fun little sport because wewere really, really bad at it.
Like REALLY bad.
And being a beginner inadulthood is also very hard.
I'll do a wholeepisode in the future.
Stay tuned.
Part of what holds us backfrom putting ourselves out
(15:46):
there is fear of rejection.
And oof, that is a hard one.
But I urge you that now morethan ever, this is important.
What I would caution you todo is avoid becoming bonded
by something you hate, likeall the naysayers who are
so ardently anti-California.
That kind of hateeats at your soul.
(16:08):
Be united by something positiveas opposed to coming together
against your own best interests.
It doesn't behoove anyone tohate California, for example,
especially if you eat anyof the food, drink any of
the wine, or use any of thetechnology created here.
The looming issue is that ournow current administration
(16:28):
has a real disdain forall the attributes that
make communities powerful.
Why would they try tosegregate us and roll back
so many of our rights if theyweren't threatened by them?
I've seen several people expressthe sentiment that it's almost
a good thing these wildfireshappened before January 20th.
Because we don't know ifwe would have gotten any
(16:50):
federal assistance after that.
Yeah, with the people at thefederal level heckling our
local mayor and governor,the days of relying on
the federal governmentmight be in the rearview.
Despite the fact that Californiajust became the fourth largest
economy in the entire world!We just bested Germany.
Yay.
(17:11):
These fires are a good thing forthe people who hate California,
because anything that keeps usstruggling is a win for them.
That's weird, right?
This us versus them mentality?
We're all part ofthe same country.
Another person on Threads,Bian Li, a TEDx speaker,
who goes by the name, theAuDHD Futurist wrote quote
"This is why they want to keepeveryone dumb, poor, struggling,
(17:34):
fearful, and fighting with eachother to stay in survival mode.
When people are too exhaustedand consumed with keeping their
heads above water, they'retoo distracted to notice their
pockets being picked clean.
Because if people evolve,such as inner growth, healing,
critical thinking, compassion,questioning, it will chip away
at authority's manipulationand shatter their power."
(17:58):
End quote.
That sounds incrediblydifficult to do all alone,
which is why we need community.
Now, community doesrequire some give and take.
Hopefully, you're able togive more than you take,
but times will come when youwill need to lean harder and
require more support thanother times, than other people.
(18:21):
And this shouldn't be a sourceof shame, the way capitalism
wants you to believe it is.
You don't always haveto pull yourself up by
your own bootstraps.
Other people canhelp buoy you up.
Back in episode 11, Italked about a cheer squad,
which is a very specialsubset of community.
I have an entire signature talkaround this subject, and if you
(18:42):
want to hear it, you can hireme to give it as a presentation
to your organization.
The gist is that when you'rerunning a marathon, like this
cleanup and rebuilding of L.
A.
is going to be a marathon,you want your supporters, a.
k.
a.
your cheer squad, strategicallypositioned at the mile markers
where you're going to be atyour lowest point in terms of
(19:05):
energy, enthusiasm, or both.
They can provide you comfort interms of a new bottle of water.
Some snacks, and evenpsychological comfort to
believe you can keep going.
That last part is one ofthe most important and
the least appreciated.
Mis amigues, we have totake care of ourselves
(19:28):
and each other.
And forming communitybonds is the kind of small
rebellion or good troublethat John Lewis talked about.
And it can all be done quietly,underground, with a soft voice.
So let's recap.
As wildfires rageacross Los Angeles, the
(19:49):
devastation is undeniable.
Families have been displaced,resources are stretched
really thin, and the endis not really in sight.
And yet, in the middle of thesmoke and the ash, something
extraordinary is happening.
Communities across thecity are stepping up.
(20:10):
Organizing mutual aid anddoing what they can to fill
the gaps for those affected.
This isn't just aboutwildfires, though.
It's a broader truth.
Our systems weren'tbuilt to protect us.
With this administrationthat seems really determined
to undercut local and stategovernments they disagree
with, while also strippingaway all of our hard earned
(20:32):
rights, you know we can'trely on them now either.
John Lewis taught us to getin good, necessary trouble.
But when you've been conditionedto accept survival mode as the
default, always striving, alwayshustling, even as the world
burns around us, literally orfiguratively, it's hard to see
how or why you should care.
(20:54):
Survival mode keeps ustoo exhausted to fight
back or even notice thesystems that exploit us.
But here's the thing, whenwe pause, when we reflect,
when we connect withothers, we find strength.
And that strength threatensthe very structures
trying to keep us down.
The mutual aid that'spouring into L.
(21:15):
A.
right now is just onegleaming example of community.
A shining, rebellious spiritthat will not be broken, not by
fire, not by devastation, but ituplifts instead of tearing down.
Causing good troubledoesn't necessarily mean
putting yourself in harm'sway or even breaking laws
like John Lewis had to.
(21:37):
It can look like organizingsome of those mutual aid efforts
in your own neighborhood.
Educating yourself and othersaround you about your rights.
Amplifying grassrootscampaigns on social media.
Supporting local leaders whoadvocate for equity and justice.
You know how I feel aboutvoting at the local level.
That was the crux ofepisodes 74 and 76.
(22:00):
I'll leave you with thislast quote from another
threader that goes byTaking Off The Tinfoil Hat.
They wrote, quote,"They taught women
not to gossip, becauseknowledge is power.
They taught women to be polite,because confidence is power.
They taught women to compete,because community is power.
They taught women tobe constantly helpful,
(22:21):
because time is power."End quote.
The rules of the whiteChristian patriarchy have kept
us scared, struggling, andexploited for far too long.
We're done with that.
We are stronger in community.
When we rebel together, whenwe share knowledge and build
each other up, we create thekind of good trouble that
(22:42):
changes the world and supportsus from the inside out.
Community is a formof liberation, a form
of rebellion, as Dr.
García Peña notes in her book.
So let's take the lessonsshe's learned navigating
academia and apply them toour own social connections.
Pause and reflect.
(23:02):
What have you been conditionedto accept as normal?
What will you unlearnto create space for
community and connection?
Finally, and most importantly,please build relationships.
Find your people.
Strengthen your community.
Together, we can continueJohn Lewis's legacy.
(23:25):
You don't always haveto be hard, mija.
You get to be soft, too.
And that's a burrito.
Hey, mira, if thisepisode made you feel
some kind of way, dígame.
DM me on Instagram,or send me a text.
You can do that rightfrom your phone.
(23:45):
If you want to be a gueston the show and put your
story out there too, checkout the guest form on my
website at pauletterato.
com slash guest.
Yep, just my name, pauletterato.
com slash guest.
Y no se te olvide quehay más perks when you
join the newsletter.
Todos estos links estánen los show notes.
Muchísimas gracias foryour support, y hasta la
(24:07):
próxima vez, cuídate bien.
Buen día, mi gente, and welcometo La Vida Más Chévere The only
Spanglish podcast for childfreeLatinas y Latines, helping us
liberate ourselves from thetoxic cultural brainwashing we
all grew up with, so that we candesign our best lives instead.
I'm your host andresident childfree
Latina, Paulette Erato.
(00:24):
Before we get into it,I apologize if my voice
sounds a bit rough.
The air quality here inLA right now is really
bad, so I sound like this.
Last episode, I encouraged youto create noise, to get loud.
In contrast, here's a softerapproach to rebellion.
(00:45):
One of the open secrets todesigning your best life
is creating a communitywhere you feel supported.
We're all part of severalgroups, whether we
recognize them or not.
Some are intentional, likea professional development
group, Toastmasters, a tradeorganization, your union.
Others are circumstantial,like your work colleagues,
(01:06):
or the neighborhood HOA.
But a lot of them, we haveto seek out ourselves.
I developed the LatinasIn Podcasting community
because I didn't have aspace for that already.
So I had to build whatit was I was missing.
And in fact, yesterday, wecelebrated MLK Day together,
sharing coffee over Zoom,so we could be distracted
(01:27):
by what was going on in D.
C.
Like I mentioned last episode,I talked about the roadmap for
rebellion, how joy is an act ofrebellion, how using the power
of your voice is a rebellion.
But I get, that might be a bitmuch for some people right now.
Maybe you're not ready to playyour instrument in the band.
(01:48):
I understand.
We live in a capitalisticpatriarchal society and
there can be consequences forgoing against the status quo.
So here's anotheroption for all of us.
Community is also a form ofrebellion, especially under
capitalism, which doesn't wantus to bond with each other.
(02:09):
It wants us to competeagainst one another.
Aye.
I love this quote fromGiselle Phelps that she
put on Threads in responseto what's happening in L.
A.
Giselle is a former TV reporterturned publicist and thought
leader, and this is what shewrote, quote, "The way we're
all expected to continueperforming capitalism in the
face of death and destructionshould give everyone pause.
(02:33):
It's time to start questioningwhat you've been conditioned
to accept as normal." End quote.
Sound familiar?
As you know, helping youdecondition from what you've
always accepted as normal ismy favorite activity and the
entire purpose of this podcast.
You see, it's really difficultto design your vida más
chévere if you haven't yetopened your eyes and woken
(02:54):
up to the many, many waysin which capitalism and the
patriarchy have you shackled.
And that's what mycommunity is here for, the
community for this podcast.
So thank you, as a listener, forbeing a crucial part of that.
Community as Rebellion isalso the name of a book by Dr.
Lorgia García Peña, a professorof Latinx studies at Princeton.
(03:18):
I'm recording this before I getmy copy of her book, but let
me read you the description.
Quote, "Weaving personalnarrative with political
analysis, Community asRebellion offers a meditation
on creating liberatory spacesfor students and faculty
of color within academia.
Much like other scholars ofcolor, Lorgia García Peña
has struggled against thecolonizing, racializing,
(03:40):
classist, and unequal structuresthat perpetuate systemic
violence within universities.
Through personal experiencesand analytical reflections,
the author invites readers, inparticular Black, Indigenous,
Latinx, and Asian women,to engage in liberatory
practices of boycott.
Abolition and radical communitybuilding to combat the
(04:02):
academic world's tokenizingand exploitive structures."
End quote.
Dr.
García Peña's experienceswithin academia are an example
of the way in which oursociety tends to hurt what it
considers its weakest members.
The incoming administrationseems to have a real hard
on for doing this andcontinuing this practice.
(04:24):
John Lewis coined thephrase, Good Trouble.
And since it's the day after wecelebrate the late, great Martin
Luther King's legacy, let's talkabout creating good trouble.
I'm going to read you thisarticle written by Paulette
Beete, and I promise I didnot know her name when I found
this, which she wrote for theNational Endowment for the Arts.
(04:44):
Quote, "It is difficult tohear the phrase, good trouble,
and not instantly think ofthe late civil rights leader
and Georgia Congressman, JohnLewis, for whom the phrase
was a type of battle cry.
In numerous interviews, Lewisrecounted how he came to adopt
the phrase as a way to talkabout his Civil Rights work.
He recalled how his motheroften instructed him to stay
(05:06):
out of the way, stay out oftrouble, which was not an
unusual stance for a mothertrying to raise a young black
boy in the American Southduring the mid 20th century.
Meeting the Reverend Dr.
Martin Luther King Jr.
as a teenager, however,taught Lewis that sometimes
the only way to bring changewas by getting in trouble.
As the Congressman told theBates College graduating class
(05:28):
of 2016, that introduction toKing 'inspired me to stand up,
to speak up, and speak out.
And I got in the way.
I got in trouble.
Good trouble.
Necessary trouble.'" End quote.
Necessary trouble.
That's what sticks with me.
As a grown woman, a mouthyand childfree Latina, I am
(05:49):
inconvenient to the patriarchy.
I'm of no use to them because Irefuse to procreate or shut up.
I love that for me.
And because I advocate for youto do the same, I'm not winning
any brownie points with them.
That's fine.
They've got plenty ofpick me's to choose from.
I'm grown.
I'm urging you to create goodand necessary trouble, whether
(06:12):
that's by playing your voiceor by embracing your community.
Cool.
So how do we do that?
Let's talk about whatcommunity can look like.
In case you don't know, I wasborn and raised in Los Angeles.
Watching the destruction tearthrough LA in the last few weeks
has paralyzed a lot of us, evenif we weren't directly affected.
(06:34):
And it turns out that's anabsolutely normal feeling.
The collective grief aswe witness the devastation
isn't comfortable.
But it is real.
This communal anguish hasonly been made worse by the
online armchair experts or theempty headed pundits spreading
abject lies about what'shappening here on the ground.
(06:56):
Not very community-mindedof our fellow Americans.
It's part of theplaybook, though.
Othering us Californiansstrips us of humanity.
And makes it easier to turnus into objects of ridicule.
If victims are reduced to simplya statistic, or dismissed as
deserving of their plight,it's easier to either ignore
(07:16):
them, or worse, scapegoatthem for larger problems.
The fires have been said bythe stupidest among us to
be caused by wokeness, or D.
E.
I.
As opposed to the glaringlyobvious truth we all
know, climate change.
But hey, now that theSupreme Court said we
(07:37):
can sue oil companies forthat, it should be okay!
How often have we seen thesame framework at play in
reporting the atrocitiesin Gaza or Ukraine?
In the wake of the floatingisland of garbage comments
last fall, millions of PuertoRicans banded together to
reject this characterization.
(07:58):
And suddenly, the internetwas flooded with support from
all corners of the world.
It's kind of like what's goingon in Los Angeles right now.
A very smart man oncetold us that Mexico
doesn't send their best.
No.
Mexican firemen volunteeredtheir elite skills instead.
So, a huge shout out toMexico and Canada and all our
(08:21):
neighboring states and beyondwho see through the bullshit
that's being reported andhave offered support instead.
That's humanity, that's courage.
That's how a communityis supposed to operate.
This support should have beencoming from our own people,
our own fellow Americans.
(08:42):
All of our news storiesshould be urging people
to help this criticalpart of what is supposed
to be the United States.
Instead of telling us it's ourfault, they could be helping
this economy they all depend on.
But they decided to bite thehand that feeds them instead.
Alrighty then.
(09:03):
A community of helpers iswhat I want to be a part of.
You remember that Mr.
Rogers quote, don't you?
He said his mom would tellhim, "Look for the helpers.
You'll always findpeople who are helping."
That's community.
And it's times like this,not just these natural
disasters, but livingunder this administration,
(09:24):
when community becomesof the utmost importance.
Being able to lean on yourneighbors, your friends,
anyone during this timeis going to be invaluable.
For people who don't have asupport network like that, it's
going to make an unfathomablydifficult time that much harder.
(09:45):
If you're one of the LAresidents who have been
displaced or need support,please check out the show
notes for a list of availableresources that will be
continuously updated.
The disaster in LA has shownus what the power of community
looks like, how localshave mobilized to provide
aid where the governmentcouldn't yet or won't.
(10:05):
From local restaurants andChef José Andrés serving the
fire crews and the displacedcitizens to the donation centers
overwhelmed by volunteers,to the wave of support from
the crews sent from Canada,from Mexico and beyond,
we've got this taking care ofour fellow humans mentality
here, and it's amazing.
(10:26):
For those of us carrying thatgrief, sometimes the best way to
deal with it is through action.
One of the best things youcan do to calm your nerves
is direct that energyinto doing something.
Donating money, goods,or even your time is an
(10:46):
excellent use of that energy.
And mutual aid organizationscan always use assistance.
And please keep that inmind, as my friend Sylvia
said, once the news crews aregone next month, and there's
no longer a daily story,people will still need help.
But what about ourimmediate communities?
You don't have to haveundergone a disaster in order
(11:08):
to get to know your neighbors.
Do you know their names?
Now is a good as time asany to connect with them.
Because at the end of the day,all we have is each other.
What are other ways to createcommunity in this modern
and often isolating world?
I mentioned that I built, ambuilding, Latinas In Podcasting
(11:31):
because of what I perceivedas a hole I need it filled.
But creating and nurturinga community takes time,
effort, and lots of patience.
Bonds aren't formed overnight,so you can't expect a
community to simply springup where it's planted.
It has to be tended to,like any garden, like
(11:51):
anything worth growing.
So, if you start now, imaginewhere you can be in six months.
Because, trust me bro, insix months, we're still
gonna need that support.
We all will.
Pour into the communitiesyou have currently.
(12:11):
But what if you're moreof a joiner than a leader?
Hey, that's okay too.
Sometimes we need models ofbehavior before we can see
ourselves in those roles.
Another reason this podcastexists, to provide you
with these very examples.
So look around and askyourself, what can I join?
What do I wantmore of in my life?
(12:34):
What do I have the space for?
It might look like a runningclub, a book club, a group of
people with tools, buildinga Habitat for Humanity house,
or even an online childfreespace where you can vent about
the bingos you hear and learnsassy retorts to all of them.
If you're thinking, butPaulette, my interests are
very niche, I'd say bet.
(12:55):
Let me tell you a storyof an imaginary friend
we'll call Valentina.
Valentina wanted to find anunderwater basket weaving group
that met on the 14th Sundayof the year and hosted bake
sales for orphaned otters.
Valentina very clearlyhas very niche interests
and that's great.
She's a unique and complicatedhuman just like the rest of us.
(13:18):
But she also doesn't seek tobe all things to all people,
and she eventually recognizedthat all potential communities
may not offer her 100 percentof what she needs in every way.
This is why you need and shouldseek out multiple, maybe even
overlapping, communities.
Valentina discoveredthat was the case for
(13:40):
her, so what did she do?
She found her underwaterweaving group, they had their
own thing, and then she founda separate orphaned otter
group that did its own thing.
And she became the commonlink between the two.
The one who could bridgethem together for anyone else
looking to expand either theirweaving or ottering skills.
(14:00):
And then on the 14th Sundayof the year, the orphaned
otters were able to rely onthe underwater basket weavers
to assist in a donation drive.
Magically, she helped improvetwo distinct communities
that are both dear to her.
By doing what?
Simply joining.
Showing up.
(14:21):
Isn't that amazing?
I realize this is a ridiculousexample, but I think you get it.
You hold multitudes withinyou, but you can explore
separate pieces of yourselfone at a time and bring them
together in a new way foryou, while also creating,
or joining, or becoming partof a larger support system.
(14:41):
That's just one way to createcommunity, to be in community.
As adults, it becomes harderto make friends because
we're not thrust into sharedcircumstances the same way
we were in kindergarten, orin college, or even during
natural disasters, very often.
We usually have tocreate that on our own
and that can be scary.
(15:03):
But I'd be more concernedwith loneliness right now
than the fear of puttingyourself out there.
And I realize thatit doesn't come easy.
Over the last six months,Ryan and I have become part
of a pickleball community.
We have friends we playpickup games with outside
of our weekly lessons.
They might be listeningto this episode.
How did that happen?
(15:23):
We just had to show upand see if we liked it.
Turns out we did, and we'veeven gotten better at this
fun little sport because wewere really, really bad at it.
Like REALLY bad.
And being a beginner inadulthood is also very hard.
I'll do a wholeepisode in the future.
Stay tuned.
Part of what holds us backfrom putting ourselves out
(15:46):
there is fear of rejection.
And oof, that is a hard one.
But I urge you that now morethan ever, this is important.
What I would caution you todo is avoid becoming bonded
by something you hate, likeall the naysayers who are
so ardently anti-California.
That kind of hateeats at your soul.
(16:08):
Be united by something positiveas opposed to coming together
against your own best interests.
It doesn't behoove anyone tohate California, for example,
especially if you eat anyof the food, drink any of
the wine, or use any of thetechnology created here.
The looming issue is that ournow current administration
(16:28):
has a real disdain forall the attributes that
make communities powerful.
Why would they try tosegregate us and roll back
so many of our rights if theyweren't threatened by them?
I've seen several people expressthe sentiment that it's almost
a good thing these wildfireshappened before January 20th.
Because we don't know ifwe would have gotten any
(16:50):
federal assistance after that.
Yeah, with the people at thefederal level heckling our
local mayor and governor,the days of relying on
the federal governmentmight be in the rearview.
Despite the fact that Californiajust became the fourth largest
economy in the entire world!We just bested Germany.
Yay.
(17:11):
These fires are a good thing forthe people who hate California,
because anything that keeps usstruggling is a win for them.
That's weird, right?
This us versus them mentality?
We're all part ofthe same country.
Another person on Threads,Bian Li, a TEDx speaker,
who goes by the name, theAuDHD Futurist wrote quote
"This is why they want to keepeveryone dumb, poor, struggling,
(17:34):
fearful, and fighting with eachother to stay in survival mode.
When people are too exhaustedand consumed with keeping their
heads above water, they'retoo distracted to notice their
pockets being picked clean.
Because if people evolve,such as inner growth, healing,
critical thinking, compassion,questioning, it will chip away
at authority's manipulationand shatter their power."
(17:58):
End quote.
That sounds incrediblydifficult to do all alone,
which is why we need community.
Now, community doesrequire some give and take.
Hopefully, you're able togive more than you take,
but times will come when youwill need to lean harder and
require more support thanother times, than other people.
(18:21):
And this shouldn't be a sourceof shame, the way capitalism
wants you to believe it is.
You don't always haveto pull yourself up by
your own bootstraps.
Other people canhelp buoy you up.
Back in episode 11, Italked about a cheer squad,
which is a very specialsubset of community.
I have an entire signature talkaround this subject, and if you
(18:42):
want to hear it, you can hireme to give it as a presentation
to your organization.
The gist is that when you'rerunning a marathon, like this
cleanup and rebuilding of L.
A.
is going to be a marathon,you want your supporters, a.
k.
a.
your cheer squad, strategicallypositioned at the mile markers
where you're going to be atyour lowest point in terms of
(19:05):
energy, enthusiasm, or both.
They can provide you comfort interms of a new bottle of water.
Some snacks, and evenpsychological comfort to
believe you can keep going.
That last part is one ofthe most important and
the least appreciated.
Mis amigues, we have totake care of ourselves
(19:28):
and each other.
And forming communitybonds is the kind of small
rebellion or good troublethat John Lewis talked about.
And it can all be done quietly,underground, with a soft voice.
So let's recap.
As wildfires rageacross Los Angeles, the
(19:49):
devastation is undeniable.
Families have been displaced,resources are stretched
really thin, and the endis not really in sight.
And yet, in the middle of thesmoke and the ash, something
extraordinary is happening.
Communities across thecity are stepping up.
(20:10):
Organizing mutual aid anddoing what they can to fill
the gaps for those affected.
This isn't just aboutwildfires, though.
It's a broader truth.
Our systems weren'tbuilt to protect us.
With this administrationthat seems really determined
to undercut local and stategovernments they disagree
with, while also strippingaway all of our hard earned
(20:32):
rights, you know we can'trely on them now either.
John Lewis taught us to getin good, necessary trouble.
But when you've been conditionedto accept survival mode as the
default, always striving, alwayshustling, even as the world
burns around us, literally orfiguratively, it's hard to see
how or why you should care.
(20:54):
Survival mode keeps ustoo exhausted to fight
back or even notice thesystems that exploit us.
But here's the thing, whenwe pause, when we reflect,
when we connect withothers, we find strength.
And that strength threatensthe very structures
trying to keep us down.
The mutual aid that'spouring into L.
(21:15):
A.
right now is just onegleaming example of community.
A shining, rebellious spiritthat will not be broken, not by
fire, not by devastation, but ituplifts instead of tearing down.
Causing good troubledoesn't necessarily mean
putting yourself in harm'sway or even breaking laws
like John Lewis had to.
(21:37):
It can look like organizingsome of those mutual aid efforts
in your own neighborhood.
Educating yourself and othersaround you about your rights.
Amplifying grassrootscampaigns on social media.
Supporting local leaders whoadvocate for equity and justice.
You know how I feel aboutvoting at the local level.
That was the crux ofepisodes 74 and 76.
(22:00):
I'll leave you with thislast quote from another
threader that goes byTaking Off The Tinfoil Hat.
They wrote, quote,"They taught women
not to gossip, becauseknowledge is power.
They taught women to be polite,because confidence is power.
They taught women to compete,because community is power.
They taught women tobe constantly helpful,
(22:21):
because time is power."End quote.
The rules of the whiteChristian patriarchy have kept
us scared, struggling, andexploited for far too long.
We're done with that.
We are stronger in community.
When we rebel together, whenwe share knowledge and build
each other up, we create thekind of good trouble that
(22:42):
changes the world and supportsus from the inside out.
Community is a formof liberation, a form
of rebellion, as Dr.
García Peña notes in her book.
So let's take the lessonsshe's learned navigating
academia and apply them toour own social connections.
Pause and reflect.
(23:02):
What have you been conditionedto accept as normal?
What will you unlearnto create space for
community and connection?
Finally, and most importantly,please build relationships.
Find your people.
Strengthen your community.
Together, we can continueJohn Lewis's legacy.
(23:25):
You don't always haveto be hard, mija.
You get to be soft, too.
And that's a burrito.
Hey, mira, if thisepisode made you feel
some kind of way, dígame.
DM me on Instagram,or send me a text.
You can do that rightfrom your phone.
(23:45):
If you want to be a gueston the show and put your
story out there too, checkout the guest form on my
website at pauletterato.
com slash guest.
Yep, just my name, pauletterato.
com slash guest.
Y no se te olvide quehay más perks when you
join the newsletter.
Todos estos links estánen los show notes.
Muchísimas gracias foryour support, y hasta la
(24:07):
próxima vez, cuídate bien.
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