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August 20, 2025 8 mins
What if the thing you crave most is the one thing you can’t say out loud?  You love your partner. The sex is good. But there’s more inside you—a desire you’ve never voiced. Not because it’s wrong… but because you’re terrified of what might happen if you do. Will they judge you? Will they feel like they’re not enough? Could it change everything?   In this Language of Love session, I connect with Kelly, who’s been married for five years and loves her husband deeply. Their sex life? Pretty solid. But there’s a part of her that wants more. She has desires she’s never shared—and she’s terrified that voicing them might hurt his feelings or make him think he’s not enough. So what do you do when you want to grow sexually with your partner, but you’re afraid it could backfire? In this session, we talk through: Why it’s not a great idea to talk about fantasies in the middle of sex (and when to do it instead) How to open up these conversations in a way that feels safe, honest, and even exciting The “Fantasy Box” game I love recommending to couples who want to spice things up together How to find creative middle ground when your fantasies don’t totally match If you’ve ever held back something in the bedroom because you didn’t want to rock the boat, you’re going to feel seen in this one. And if Kelly’s story sounds a little like yours, I’d love to hear from you. Email me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com—your story could help someone else feel less alone. Want more tools for connection and pleasure? Head over to my website, and check out my latest book, Sex Magic, for a deeper dive into unlocking spectacular intimacy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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