July 20, 2024 • 42 mins
Can modern relationships truly balance traditional gender roles with the demands of contemporary life? Join us on this episode of Latina State of Mind as Xenia, Diana, and Nancy share their personal journeys from religiously influenced household norms to more egalitarian partnerships. Hear how they navigate the evolving landscape of love and family responsibilities, highlighting the shift from men as sole providers to shared roles in modern households. Our candid conversation also explores the growing trend of opting out of parenthood and the dynamic role of fathers today.
We also tackle the often unspoken challenges faced by stay-at-home parents, especially new mothers. We dive deep into the emotional and physical toll of childcare and household management, stressing the necessity of a supportive partner who shares these burdens. Reflecting on past generations, we celebrate the positive changes in fatherhood, where dads are now more engaged in parenting than ever before. The dialogue underscores the critical importance of empathy and shared responsibilities in nurturing a healthy family environment.
Concluding with a pressing issue, we address the recent legislation in Louisiana that restricts access to abortion pills, highlighting its severe impact on women's healthcare choices. This episode takes a strong stance on preserving reproductive rights and criticizes the hypocrisy of policymakers. We also discuss the importance of open communication in relationships when making life-altering decisions, such as becoming a stay-at-home parent or choosing not to have children. Tune in for heartfelt stories, robust discussions, and a call to action as we navigate the complexities of modern relationships and parenting.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
this is latina state of mind, a podcast created by
latinas for all audiences, wherewe can share our experiences
about love, life and everythingin between.
Hello, hello and welcome toanother episode of Latina State
(00:33):
of Mind.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
This is Xenia.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
This is Diana.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
And this is Nancy.
How are you guys?
Speaker 1 (00:39):
Good, how are you?
I'm good.
We're going to be talking todayabout modern relationships and
love and family.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Yeah, are y'all ready , ready?
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Yeah, I'm ready to talk some shit, as she usually
is.
Nothing new, nothing new.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
I think so.
This topic is reallyinteresting to me because I
always thought I wanted a verytrue.
I still think that I have avery traditional relationship,
but the more I think about it,the more I realize that I don't
that like I live in a moremodern relationship.
Um, but, like you know, I grewup religious, so, like for me,
(01:23):
like the goal was to have atraditional and what was?
Speaker 2 (01:27):
yeah, what was your perspective, what's your view of
it?
Speaker 3 (01:29):
yeah, that's exactly what I was gonna ask too, so it
was just um.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
The man is a provider and I stay at home, mom, and I
do all the cooking and cleaningand I'm the one that takes care
of the children and.
I do the sewing and likeliterally all that.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Go gather the fruits and the veggies.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Yeah, I have my little garden and, yeah, make
bread from scratch and all thefun stuff, two kids, three kids,
no like five, five kids, twoand a half.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
Two and a half is the .
Speaker 1 (02:05):
That's the average.
The average, yeah, like five,two and a half.
That's the average.
That's a modern average.
I wanted five or six.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
Oh jeez, you want him to work out on the farm and
stuff like that yeah, exactly asJerome shakes his head.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
What?
Speaker 2 (02:22):
Is he a city boy?
City boy, I think so, and whatis your perspective now?
Oh, no, 100.
None of that, but I didn't knowbetter yeah I didn't know
better you were kind of blindedby religion, I think so I think
(02:42):
a lot of it is guided byreligion.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
I think the same goes in Catholicism, which is what I
grew up in learning knowingabout Same Men, women, children.
The man is the provider working.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
And mom stays at home and watches the kids and does
all the housework.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
And you know, in our relationship now, my husband
does go to work and I stay homewith the baby.
But the difference is that I'mnot expected to like have a
spotless, clean home and I'm notexpected to have dinner ready
on the table when he gets here,you mean he's not going to beat
you up.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Yeah, exactly what.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
You know, I don't, I'm not expected to rub his feet
as he gets home and you know,like I'm not expected to do all
those things, if anything.
Like he gets home and I get abreak.
Like he gets home and he says,hey, it's time for your break.
Like give me the baby and go,he clocks in yeah, go basically,
and then right, like clocks outand clocks in, and then we, we
(03:44):
share this responsibility of ababy that we both made Exactly.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Because you both made them.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
And he thinks like it's really interesting to see
it, because he thinks that thisis standard.
Like we were just talking aboutthis.
He was like because I told himhow impressed I am, I like how
good he is with our baby andlike how much help he gives me
and how amazing it all is and hewas like this is standard, like
this is what should be done,but this is not what it's done,
(04:13):
like for a lot of women, likethey don't get the help that
they need from their partnerswhen it comes to the children
like.
I know for a fact that if I wasworking as well as having a
baby at home, like I, would havethe exact same help that I have
now like I would, or more likeright, and that's the difference
(04:34):
between that traditional andmodern relationship yeah yes I
am not currently in arelationship, so I don't know
how well I can talk about this,but but you know, you have an
idea and you've seen
Speaker 2 (04:47):
yeah, and one thing one of my biggest requirements
to have like a family, to havekids, is that the dad like the
father of my kids is an actualdad, is an actual father like
takes care of the child we bothmade.
Yeah, I don't want to be thesoul and I feel like it happens
a lot and that's why divorce ishappening a lot, because the mom
(05:09):
usually shares most of theresponsibility of taking care of
the house.
Uh, a lot of times they'reprofessional, the profession and
the kids as well.
Yeah, um, and so at least oneof my requirements, I I don't
mind.
I've been taught to work.
My parents taught me to work,whether it was my brothers or me
(05:29):
like a girl, I've been taughtto do that, so I don't have an
issue with that, but I do need,I do require the partner to give
in some equal help.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
But I will not have children if I don't have like a
good partner in that sense.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Yeah, that's one of the things of modern
relationships also, I think.
No, well, people are stillexpected to do things, but I
feel like a lot of people noware deciding not to have kids,
like that's something thatpeople are choosing for
themselves.
Yeah, good for them.
I think it's still questioned alot by especially by like their
(06:07):
parents, which grew up in adifferent generation.
But yeah, I feel like creatinga family for a lot of people
doesn't necessarily involvehaving kids, yeah, yeah, and I
get that a lot.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
It's got questioned a lot and I think, well, there's
a reason why people don't wantto have kids because having kids
is hard.
It's how it's hard and theymaybe didn't receive the
attention that they would haverequired, so they don't want to
pass along that too if theycan't do that to their child,
why would they have a child?
Speaker 3 (06:37):
yeah.
If they don't want to, whywould they?
Yeah, right, like they justdon't want to spend money on
that.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
I mean mean on a child, Not that Sorry I think
one of the things also and I'venoticed this a lot is that there
are a lot of married singleparents or, like single women,
single mothers.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
Like they're married but they don't have the support
Right, so they're technicallysingle mothers.
And not only that, sometimesthey're raising their husband or
their partner right, which Ithink is like I have.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
I know a lot of people who have relationships
where the woman is expected todo everything that has to do
with the kids.
Like a kid needs a bath youhandle it.
Kids need to eat you handle it.
They need a diaper change youhandle it.
And at that point, what's thepoint?
You know like, yeah might aswell, just yeah, like might as
well be single sticking updivorce the man yeah hopefully
(07:34):
get some uh, uh.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
What's it called um child support, support and?
You're doing it on your ownanyway you were already doing it
on your own.
Let's get some kind offinancial stability.
I mean, unfortunately that'snot the case for all the um
cases, but still yeah, it'sinteresting.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
I'm in a relationship with a woman, so modern
relationship for sure the awardthe most modern relationship.
Um, yeah, so it's interesting tothink about anything like that,
like household chores or whoworks or who doesn't, because I
mean whoever works works, andwhoever is there and can do the
(08:15):
things does the things, and,yeah, we both work together to
get stuff done, and that's it Ifeel like, but I feel like the
men have been raised to notnotice, yeah, yeah like it's
there, the dirty dishes might bethere yeah but there might be
taught to not notice them, tonot acknowledge it and not
acknowledge when the dishes areclean.
(08:38):
Do you know what I think it isalso?
I think right, I don't know for, but I think a lot of it is too
that some men feel like becausethey're going to work.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
They're done.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
They have done what they should be doing, without
taking into consideration howmuch work it is being at home.
Especially if you have kids,it's a lot of work.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
Bro, I live by myself and it's tough bro, I have to
clean after myself.
A lot of these men don't evenclean after themselves, don't
clean after their children,don't clean after their partner
so yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
I think a lot of it is that they feel like they've
contributed enough by workingwithout thinking about how much
work it takes if they have apartner who's female and is at
home doing everything bring meback two paychecks and I'll do
whatever I can.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
That's what I used.
Okay, let me chime in becausehere's the thing.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
I felt so like, oh my gosh, please, it's like as a
female, I was like it's easy,like just be.
It's like as a female, I waslike it's easy, like just be
home, you know, like clean andjust clean yourself and just be
home.
I've been a stay at home momfor about a month, two months.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
So just a little bit of experience.
This shit is hard yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Because there are times when baby does not want to
be put down and he screams andcries.
If I put him down and I don'thave the heart to let my child
cry for 10 minutes while I takea shower and just let him like
scream his little lungs out, I'mnot.
I'm not that kind of personthat's like, if you, if you, if
you do that, it's up to you, um,yeah, um.
(10:22):
But then you know, like I haveto figure out a way to like kind
of clean up the house whilesometimes having to carry him,
while sometimes putting him down, if he lets me while taking
care of myself while figuringout how to do dishes.
Well, maybe, um, I had time totake out the chicken or the meat
(10:43):
or whatever it is for dinner,but it's a process and it's hard
and it's like you have to beavailable to feed.
You have to be available and,like, a lot of the times, by the
time Jerome gets home, I'moverstimulated and I'm just like
like I just need 10 minutes tonot be touched, like because
that baby's on you the entiretime and you know and that's
(11:04):
great because you're his safetyand that's who what the baby
wants to be but how sad it is toto feel all those things and
not have a partner that getshome to you and says, hey, here,
give me a baby, I'll take abreak you don't have.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
You, don't you right?
You're a safety to your child.
But who's a safety to you?
To me, yeah, especially withpostpartum like your hormones
are like crazy right.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
So that's another dynamic.
So like not only are we dealingwith this relationship, that's
modern to us because we're notdoing with the traditional thing
I don't cook, I don't like tocook like it's not my thing, I
don't like it, I don't find anyjoy in cooking like I don't like
it I burn things like I stopped.
(11:47):
If I cook, I cook because I havea craving of something I know
how to make, but it's notsomething that gives me a lot of
joy, like it makes me sad tosay it because I wish I I like
to cook but we've also beenconditioned that we are supposed
to know how to yes, and that'sanother thing you know, like,
like you're a bad wife if youcan't exactly now this trader,
joe's meal is gonna sufficeexactly trader joe's for the win
(12:11):
the kung fu chicken, kung paochicken yum but then you feel,
as a woman, like I have felt sobad and I have put so much of my
(12:31):
worth in a traditional marriageand I have been like so hard on
myself for not cooking for him,for not having a spotless house
, for not having my makeup done,for not looking a certain way.
Man, I'm trying like every dayI'm like I'm gonna get a.
I brush my teeth and I gottashower today.
He let me shower today and Iput a little mascara on and I
(12:54):
won today.
You know, like every day isdifferent and so like I'm so
grateful that I don't havesomebody that's coming home and
yelling at me for not beingfully make makeup done and for
not having dinner on the tableand for you know and this is a
man that provides for you and,exactly like men that are not
providing, are doing this, andthat's the yeah, that's a whole
(13:17):
nother story.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Evaluate your life if you're not providing.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
But yet here you are demanding right right and so,
like I see, I think about likethe women that came before me in
their traditional marriage andI'm like how the hell did they
do that?
Because this, this is hard, andthey had like six or seven kids
, yeah yeah have one.
Imagine when you have two.
No, I can't, she doesn't wantto.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
No I get it.
I feel like maybe I can talkabout my parents' relationship.
My dad was a provider.
My mom was also a provider and,yeah, he was a good dad, just
kidding.
No, he was a great dad becauseshe provided, he provided, and
then they both took care of thechildren.
(14:05):
My siblings and I, we were bothtaken care of by them.
It wasn't just like, oh, it'sjust mom or it's just dad, no,
it was both of them, and whetherthey were fighting or not or
whatever, they would still Likethey were still our parents
Still divided them.
Yeah, exactly, you know likedoesn't matter what was going on
with them.
They were still always ourparents and so that's kind of
(14:28):
maybe that's why I have myrequirement that I need someone
like that in my life, becauseI'll be able to provide.
They might be able to providebut, like, both of them need to
provide to the children that youboth made.
But I don't know how my mom didit.
She worked and took care oflike usually most of mostly four
of us I'm like you, go girl.
Speaker 1 (14:49):
One of the things I have heard is that we have the
most involved fathers in thisgeneration.
Like, um, this generation hasthe fathers that are most
involved in the in theirchildren's life, and I, like, I
think that's pretty cool like Isee my husband, with my, with,
with our kid, and I think howlucky is my, my, my baby that he
(15:09):
gets a dad that's like fullyinvolved and like it's there all
the time.
And I see my brothers withtheir kids and they're like so
into it.
My dad was pretty involved withus, like he was um, but I think
it's really cool.
You know like we have that thisgeneration.
Another thing that these modernrelationships are doing is like
we're having open relationshipspeople have open marriages and
(15:33):
that's something you didn't like.
Maybe it was a hush hush thinglike there was an arrangement.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Yeah, thing back in the day I'm sure it was a thing.
Speaker 3 (15:41):
I think there's always been a thing, but I think
now people are allowed to areallowed to say it and be open
about it, Right right.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Yeah, bring in whoever you need to bring in.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
Yeah, I think that's kind of part of what being in a
modern relationship is is kindof choosing whatever works for
you and your family, whateverthat means to you, even because
I know a lot of women also justwant to be home with kids and,
yeah, like good for you that'syour choice.
That's the beauty about itexactly being able to make
(16:16):
decisions what feminism, yeah,yeah and I feel like I mean
that's great, right, if they canand that's what they want and
that works out for them, that'sperfect.
But also having the choice tonot just wait for a man to come
home and have dinner ready forthem or whatever, if that's not
what you really want to do, yeahyeah, for sure.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
I think that it's so important, like when we're, when
you're one of the conversationsand and this might be a part of
a we're when you're one of theconversations and and this might
be a part of a more modernrelationship too like one of the
conversations I had with withmy husband, before we even
thought about marriage, is if,if you and I ever had a kid and
our kid came out as gay,transgender or whatever that,
what would your reaction be?
(17:00):
and he said I don't know, I'dlove the kid like it's my kid
and that was for me like such animportant conversation to have,
because I have a lot of friendsthat are part of that community
and I I, if my child was thatis that, um, I'm not gonna
disown them, I'm not gonna kickthem out, and but you know how
(17:21):
does your partner feel about it.
You know, and those areconversations we're not, we were
not having before and we'rehaving now, and that was an
important part of myrelationship, because I didn't
want to have a fight like that,like I didn't want anybody to
make my kid feel less thanbecause of whatever, whoever
they are.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
Right, you know.
So that was a green flag, forsure, that was a super green
flag.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
And that was for me an important conversation.
You know 100 an importantconversation and a lot of the
conversation starts with the doyou want to have kids?
Conversation yeah but, yes, alot of these conversations are
being had now, whether openrelationship, whether closed
relationship.
Kids, no kids what happens ifthe kids don't turn out the
quote-unquote traditional way.
(18:08):
What if they think differently,work differently, and that
works with, uh, whatever genderis going on, or sexuality, but
also with the like diseases ornot diseases, but like
disabilities yeah that that's.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
That should be embedded in the conversation as
well yeah, maybe that's part ofit too, just having
conversations about everythingand both partners being able to
have an opinion and validatingeach other's opinions and making
sure that you're on the samepage about things before
committing.
I think before it was just likemore about maybe, well at first
(18:45):
, something that made sense forthe families.
Right like you marry someonewho helped your family grow or
whatever, yeah and then maybemore attraction than anything
else.
But now I feel like we're alsohaving conversations like Diana.
Like you were saying, yourequire that someone provides
this for you or brings this tothe table for you.
I think we to the table for you.
I think we're more open totalking about things like that
(19:07):
when we find someone who can bea potential partner.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Yeah, because I feel like most of us want to find a
person that we're going to bewith for the rest of our lives
and pick the right one.
Yeah, ask the right questionsto get there.
Speaker 3 (19:20):
Yeah, but even divorce now is more common and
part of like I don't know likeblended families blended
families.
I think that's great yeah it'smore of the modern yeah way, I
suppose yeah different dynamics.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
People are not staying for the kids as they
were yes, yes, yes, yes, veryimportant I think it's, I think
think it's great, great, yeah, Imean, why make them go through
whatever you're going with yourpartner, right?
If you can provide a saferspace, then try to do that.
Speaker 3 (19:52):
Yeah, If you can.
Yeah for sure.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
I think one of the key things is also like having
relationships that make youhappy.
You know, Like I feel like alot of the times I know I did it
before like you feel lonely andyou settle into something that
feels kind of comfortable orkind of okay, like they give you
like enough, yeah, enough yeah,but I feel like that also
(20:18):
doesn't bring you the most joy.
And if you follow like I don'tknow, like if you know who you
are and you know what you want,then you should be able to have
those conversations with yourpartner or the person you're
attracted to or you're going tostart a relationship with, and
and really find like, reallyfind like the key things that
(20:40):
are important for you and thatwill make you like happy.
You know, like that that bringsyou joy and makes you the
happiest yeah, that should bethe goal in life, right, yeah?
Speaker 3 (20:51):
should be it should be yeah do you think diana or
yesenia, or both of you?
If your partner male lost theirjob, like if you had a partner
right?
Speaker 2 (21:03):
now makes for reminding me, and they stayed
home.
Speaker 3 (21:06):
Would you guys be okay with that, with being the
provider of the home?
Speaker 2 (21:10):
I yeah yeah I would be okay if I was still working
and my partner lost their job.
Speaker 1 (21:16):
I would be okay with them being the stay-at-home
parent I wasn't okay with thatat that, like at one point I
thought it was like the weirdest, like I was because of that
traditional right that I had yep, I was like no way, like I
can't, I'm never gonna support aman blah blah.
But now I understand.
It's like you know, if he's tolose his job and I have a job
(21:37):
like, and I can provide for ourfamily why not?
yeah, why not if he stays withbaby.
Yeah, I'll do it Like that'd begreat Like.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
I personally would almost prefer it.
Yeah, because I don't know.
Men need to learn what it'slike to stay at home, and it's
going to build a differentrelationship, at least with your
children.
It's going to build a differentrelationship, maybe a closer
one with their dad, where wedon't see that.
It happens very often, uh, orit didn't happen very often, but
(22:05):
I, I wouldn't mind it.
I personally wouldn't mind it,um, but yeah, why not?
Speaker 1 (22:10):
yeah yeah I feel like it's a I think a lot of the
times like I had so many likereally uh hard opinions about
certain things, and the more Ithink about it, the more I'm
like well, yeah, because youknow I was.
I feel like I was conditionedto feel those things you know I
felt like I was told, like thisis the right way, like this is
(22:33):
the way that it's alwayssupposed to be the only way that
you're supposed to do it.
And when things didn't feel thatway, I was always like, no,
that's not right.
And then I was like, wait, whyisn't it right?
Speaker 2 (22:43):
because you, you know if someone else says yeah
that's it.
Speaker 3 (22:47):
But it feels right for that family, for that right
you know like, then it's greatyeah, we're all so different and
going through so many differentthings that obviously we're all
gonna need different thingsyeah, in our family structures
or dynamics, not aone-size-fits-all.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
Yeah, I mean, we've experienced so much already with
the pandemic that there'slikely a lot of individuals that
had to stay at home right thatwere required to stay at home
and a lot of other individualswere able to keep going to work.
So it happens and sometimesit's natural like forces you
know, you don't it's not youwillingly doing this, you just
(23:25):
have to do it because, lifebecause there's a pandemic going
on um, we are in the talks, Iguess, of like a war and then
being involved in it.
I'll guess.
Guess who goes to war?
Usually, yeah, men.
So there's going to be a periodthat there may be more women in
(23:46):
the workforce.
So and this isn't the firsttime, unfortunately, that it's
happened, so it's used to ithopefully it gets more,
unfortunately, normalized atleast in this scenario, in this
case um it's hard to talk, butsomething we need to talk about
yeah, for sure yeah, how do wefeel about men being drafted to
(24:07):
go to war?
Speaker 1 (24:08):
um, I think war is stupid and it shouldn't be
freaking happening.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
So that's my first thought yeah it is what it is, I
guess, yeah, I, it's tough,it's tough to think about, it's
tough to talk about it.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
It's yeah, I think you should go to war if you want
to go to war.
I don't think people should bedrafted to go to war.
Speaker 3 (24:27):
They don't think anybody should be made to go to
war if they don't want to goright like yeah, yeah, it's not
like you started.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
Traditional you started your war and now you're
making people go fight becauseyou wanted to fight it and make
them, but you're not sending anyof your family members to fight
this war, so yeah, no, it's,it's very unfortunate, it's but
there's, and what we're talkingis like there's a lot of these
scenarios there.
It's, it's a have to you knowyou have to.
Speaker 3 (24:55):
There's no kind of want to.
No choice in the matter.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
Yeah, exactly, yeah, right but hey, at least women
and men are being drafted thistime around, I think I'm not
sure.
Well, I'm too old, so I'm goodI won't make it my knees are too
bad for this my knees don'twork.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
I would fail that physical test real quick real
quick.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
The first thing right , you have to run a mile.
Oh, I can't man, if you give mea red bull, I'll do it well
just kidding, I'll be anxiousthe whole time, oh man is there
a um, is there a relationship, amodern relationship type that
(25:50):
you would, that you feel likeyou wouldn't be a part of that.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
You feel like in your heart, you, you just couldn't
open relationship yeah, I don'tthink I can do it no uh-uh, it's
not for me it wouldn't bring mehappiness exactly a lot of
anger I would do it, but then Iwouldn't let my partner do it,
and I recognize that that is notfair well, but it works for
(26:13):
some people, so you might beable to find someone who's okay
with that I don't want them tobe okay with that, though like
I'm so complicated I know I likethe idea flag of like them not
doing that to me either, likethem not being able to think
about me being able to do thatwith someone else what, what,
(26:33):
what you know, uh, how do Iexplain it?
Speaker 3 (26:36):
like I don't want them to be okay with you being
with somebody else.
Yeah, you want that.
You want them to be possessiveof you a little bit.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
That's the red flag.
I didn't want to say it thoughI don't want to be like I
understand, yeah, I didn't wantto say it because I don't.
I don't want people to thinkthat this is how I feel yeah,
but you are okay, but I am right.
Speaker 3 (26:56):
But who are we kidding?
Speaker 2 (26:57):
yeah, exactly, I know who I am.
That's fine.
No, but I don't think I'd beable to do it for that reason
yeah, I don't see, and yeah,yeah, same I would absolutely
not.
Speaker 1 (27:12):
I know, I don't, I, I don't think I know for a fact
that I couldn't do it it wouldbe too difficult, right, it
would just be, and I think it'sreally interesting for um
polyamorous relationships wherethey have like all together, all
together, right that's myanswer yeah, you want to do a
(27:32):
poly I want to have twoboyfriends, two husbands and
them be part of.
Speaker 3 (27:39):
We're all like romantically involved too, all
of us.
Oh, okay, that could.
You could find that I couldfind that I don't know for sure.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Do I have to move to utah for that?
Speaker 1 (27:47):
no, no, no I don't think I could do poly either,
like that would be too difficultwe uh are watching or we're
watching um couples therapy.
Speaker 3 (28:04):
I don't know if you guys have seen that show so good
um paramount with showtime okayso good, but they had a one of
the.
It's not a couple, it's apolycule okay so it's how many
individuals?
Speaker 2 (28:20):
three yeah the man is in a relationship with both of
the women okay, but the womenare not in a relationship with
each other okay, and they alsohave other partners wow very
interesting and this is like areal thing yeah yeah, yeah, it's
part of the poly, yeah, it'spart of yeah, I mean there's a
lot of new designations, sowe're here, we're out here
(28:41):
learning yeah, that would besuper complicated for me yeah,
yeah yeah, because it's like toomany people to keep track of
but too many feelings for me toto to keep track of.
Speaker 1 (28:54):
Like I feel like I love the monogamous relationship
because I only have to focus onone person and I can give my
all to that person.
That person can give, like youknow, to that.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
I feel like if I had to do more than that, it would
be so complicated you know,you've got a point actually,
like you've got to worry aboutone person's feelings and then
the other person's feelings andmake sure that they don't
confuse their feelings.
It could get a little confusingwith that, but it's cool that
(29:26):
it works for some people rightInstead.
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Of being forced to be in a monogamous relationship
where they're going to be havingfeelings for other people as
well and hurting this personbecause they can't just have one
partner.
Speaker 2 (29:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
Good for them.
If everyone involved is Onboard, great, go for it I think
that's the key and that's whatmakes it modern Right.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
So like.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
You have to be on board, you have to talk about.
They have these conversations.
Speaker 3 (29:53):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
Openly about what you're looking for in that
relationship.
I'm going to be in a polyrelationship.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
I'm going relationship.
I'm gonna be in a polyrelationship.
I'm gonna have this.
Yeah, this is what the rulesadults, yeah, consenting adults.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
This is what the rule is gonna be.
This is where our standards,this is where our bottom lines
boundaries, all that you have totalk about, all those things
yeah, that's a lot of work yeahand if you do it and if it's and
it works, it's awesome yeah,exactly, yeah yeah, so shout out
to those people.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
Hopefully we learn more about that, because I it's
interesting new yeah, and it'scompletely yeah, 100%,
interesting yeah, you guysshould watch that show, though.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
It's really good I watched like a few episodes and
I was so annoyed with a lot ofthe males in this I wonder if it
was season two, because there'sseason one.
Speaker 3 (30:40):
Okay, yeah, and some of these guys were just like
idiots, it's like not idiotsthey're just so emotionally not
like yeah they're like they justthat connection was not yeah,
it's, it's interesting, it's aninteresting show yeah, yeah, but
it is really interesting yeahbut I don't think I could do
that, I don't think I could winan opportunity no, no it would
(31:01):
be too difficult for meboyfriends.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
I'm okay with that, yeah you, can we?
That would be poly for you,yeah, yeah I would love that
send your applications to lsomunderscore podcast.
What do you mean?
Speaker 1 (31:15):
dan, I don't know if you could share that attention,
though.
What do you?
Speaker 2 (31:19):
mean, no, I'm getting the attention, yeah, but then
you still have to give thatattention to two, do you mean?
No, I'm getting the attention,yeah, but then you still have to
give that attention to twopeople.
Speaker 3 (31:24):
No, I don't it's gonna be a one-way relationship
okay, she has two boyfriends,but she doesn't have to love
them they just or I would lovethem, though you know that
relationship would be sub domokay with both of them right um,
not what I was thinking, butwhy not yeah?
Speaker 2 (31:47):
why not?
Speaker 3 (31:48):
like make it even more interesting.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Maybe we can have this conversation again with
people that have different yeah,well no, the people that have
like different relationshiptypes and just like a monogamous
modern relationship.
Do we know anyone?
I don't know anyone, but if any, of our listeners want to come
yeah talk to us and have a funrelationship like that.
Speaker 2 (32:15):
Yeah, I don't, or not fun.
Even if it's not fun, just letus into the drama.
Speaker 3 (32:20):
Yeah, if you've had some experience with that?
That'd be cool.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
We'll make sure you don't say names, real people's
names, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
It would be such an interestingtopic though it's something
that we're not used to seeing.
We're only used to seeing thetraditional male and female and
we're finally breaking out intolike female, female, male, male.
Speaker 3 (32:55):
Woo, woo and female, and we're finally breaking out
into like female, female, it'snot pride anymore, but I know
it's always pride, always pridein uh nancy's heart.
In my world it's always no, itshould always be pride in
everybody's world.
Yeah, diana, come on, get onboard isn't there like a single
where's?
Speaker 2 (33:02):
no, not a single.
It's valentine's day februaryyeah, yeah that's that's why
they get a short month.
It's fine.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
It's fine, they can deal um, I think we're done
talking yeah, yeah, this was agreat conversation, great yeah
let's find people.
Speaker 3 (33:24):
Unless we don't have anything else.
I don't think so Just go home.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
It's been a long day.
Bye bitches.
How about some of the Diana'sDaily shit?
Here we go.
Here we go what you got today.
Speaker 2 (33:41):
We're going to have a tough conversation.
It's not a tough conversationSort of.
It's whatever I know.
No, it's important.
So recently, in May, louisianadesignated abortion pills as
controlled substance deaths.
So I know, so, I know.
(34:09):
So, meaning that having beingin possession of I'm not going
to say the names of the actualmedications because I can't but
having possessing these itemswithout a prescription could
send you to jail and it couldcost you thousands of dollars in
fines, you, thousands ofdollars in fines.
Um, so here once again, the us,or in this case, the state
(34:31):
restriction restricting accessto abortion pills or taking care
of I don't know how to say it,but like women's choice, health
care well, health care exactlythank you, yeah like, because
not only does this medicationcould help for this, but also it
could be necessary for otherthings, and this restriction is
going to restrict um, what's itcalled?
(34:51):
Doctors I couldn't think ofthat uh medical professionals
from prescribing it to otherindividuals that may or may not
need it.
Um, so it's becoming tiring tocontinue hearing of this
conversation that there's moreand more restrictions on what a
woman can and cannot do with herbody.
Um, once again, it's a lot ofmales doing this, yep, that have
(35:15):
no need for this that willnever have the need for this,
that they will never be facedwith a choice, a difficult
choice, of keeping it or ofkeeping a pregnancy or not.
Speaker 3 (35:29):
Or who might have already done something like this
.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
A lot of times, a lot of these people in power have
the option and have the fundsand have the means to go to
another state to receive thistype of health care yeah, they
and they have done it, but theywon't, but they won't, but they
won't allow you to do it right,not the people in your state,
but they can.
But they have the funds and themeans could go get taken care of
(35:54):
, like safely right um, so it'sobviously hypocrism, but it's so
unfortunate that we still haveto continue talking about this
conversation, that we still getrestricted on what we can do
with our bodies or not.
And, like I said, it's whitemales doing this restriction
when they themselves havepartaken in one way or another
(36:15):
by sending their mistresses,their whatever, to another state
to be taken care of and it'sbeen.
This has been known for.
There's reports of many, uhprofessionals doing this, or I
guess not professionals, butlike people in government having
the ability to do this.
Yep, it's been a thing sincelike the 60s, I don't know.
(36:36):
It's been a thing for a reallylong time and people don't
notice it and people are againstpro-choice and they should just
believe in the choice.
That's all we're asking.
Speaker 3 (36:47):
At least that's all I'm asking just the choice right
of the being able to keep it ornot right, it's ridiculous that
we're still having thisconversation at this point.
Speaker 1 (36:56):
It's, yeah, the saddest thing is like we are
seeing so many women that aregoing through like some really
scary health issues becausethey're not allowed to get an
abortion for like a fetus.
That's not viable or like allthese things that are happening
to their bodies and they're not.
They're getting like in troublefor trying to go to a different
(37:20):
state to get the help they need, and so I think that's like one
of the saddest things you know.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
Like you're, you're killing women and the thing is
that, okay, you're not allowingthem to have an abortion.
So when the kid, and you're soprotecting of that kid's life
while it's in the womb, but whathappens when they kill it, when
the kid is born?
They're like oh, don't usestate funds.
Don't use whatever federalbenefits.
Speaker 3 (37:45):
Yeah, they don't even want to give free lunches at
schools.
Speaker 1 (37:47):
That's the most ridiculous shit.
Speaker 3 (37:49):
I've ever heard.
Speaker 1 (37:49):
I heard somebody say they are not pro-life, they're
pro-birth.
Yeah, because after those kidsare born, you're not doing
anything for their lives.
Speaker 2 (38:00):
You're being judged for being a single mother in a
lot of cases when that couldhave been avoided if they would
have been allowed to terminatethe pregnancy because they knew
that the father was not going tobe in the picture.
So, like you're going to judgethem but you're going to do
nothing about it, you're goingto force them to have the child.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
Make it make sense, please yeah, it doesn't, it
doesn't, it doesn't.
Speaker 3 (38:21):
It's ridiculous, it is ridiculous, it's such a sad
conversation to have.
Speaker 2 (38:24):
Honestly, it really is Because we just want the
choice.
That's it.
I bet you a lot of women arenot going to go running to
terminate their pregnancy.
Speaker 1 (38:33):
No, but that's what people are making it sound like.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
But no, like they just want, we just want the
choice yeah that's it.
It's so sad, but so angeringyeah, just super yeah, yeah, I
can't even comprehend how we'rehere yeah, it's, and a lot of
these, unfortunately, and a lotof in lisiana, where this
happened.
In abuse is very common andpregnancies from that abuse can
(39:03):
be common and they can't eventerminate because of that or
they can't use thisquote-unquote controlled
substance for that yeah that'sunfortunate sad I'm sorry that I
brought you guys down, but it'sa conversation we need to have
no, seriously though it's
Speaker 3 (39:17):
just, it's just a matter of having a choice,
that's all, yeah, we'll have tohave an episode and talk about
it a little more.
Speaker 2 (39:25):
Yeah, we should cover it a little bit more so we can
all be angry.
I'm just kidding, we all areangry, the entire episode just
angry.
Speaker 3 (39:32):
Yes, what's wrong with that?
Speaker 1 (39:33):
I'm just kidding I feel like it's.
I was trying to Google this,but there are so many of these
states that are like so againstabortion are also the states
with the lowest age for marriage.
For like little ones can getmarried.
I feel like that in itselfshould tell you something like
(39:54):
these people are sick yeah.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
They have some sort of weird kink fantasy.
I don't know, I don't get it.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
I don't get what the whole obsession is with women
having children but then thesame children that are ringing
to this world to just be abused,yeah right, yeah, I don't know,
we could probably get reallydeep into this I know there's,
yeah, there's so much we'll keepit, we'll keep it light for
this one time, I know right toofar too far any closing thoughts
(40:27):
on modern relationships um.
Speaker 3 (40:32):
Thank you for the award of the most modern
relationship in the room you'rewelcome.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
I just want to say thank you, you're welcome.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
No, I'm just kidding.
Um, I think I mean for me.
I'm just glad that people aremore open to respecting people's
choices.
Speaker 2 (40:50):
It's kind of the same thing we're talking about with
abortion like it's nobody'sbusiness if they're not hurting
anyone if they're adultsconsenting consenting adults.
Speaker 3 (41:00):
It makes it, it makes them happy, like they just let
them be whatever choice theywant to make and have the
relationships they want to haveand the family they want to have
, and I don't see why that's aproblem your unhappiness should
not affect someone else'shappiness yep exactly yeah, um,
I feel like ask the questionsbefore you get into a
(41:22):
relationship.
Speaker 1 (41:23):
Be modern enough to get to know your partner.
Those things are really trulymatter to you.
Make sure that you see eye toeye in the important things.
At the end of the day, it'syour relationship and do
whatever the hell you want withit, if you want to become a
stay-at-home mom or dad thentalk about it.
Speaker 2 (41:45):
Talk about it with your partner, because they'll
most likely be on board on it,and if not, well, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (41:51):
And if you don't want to have kids, don't have kids,
don't have kids.
They're expensive, they're alot of work, but I don't want to
work and I want to spend moneyon me.
Speaker 2 (42:01):
I'm just kidding, but honestly.
I do yeah, and personally, I'mjust grateful that my parents
showed me a different type ofrelationship, so that's me
helping me get a betterrelationship.
Yeah For sure, cool, all right.
Speaker 1 (42:17):
So por también Love you guys, see you Bye, bye.
Speaker 3 (42:22):
Thank you for listening to Latina State of
Mind, produced by us, yourawesome hosts, diana, xenia and
Yancy.
Special shout out to Jerome,our editor.
Don't forget to follow us onInstagram at lsom underscore
podcast, and on Facebook atLatina State of Mind.
Hasta la proxima.
this is latina state of mind, a podcast created by
latinas for all audiences, wherewe can share our experiences
about love, life and everythingin between.
Hello, hello and welcome toanother episode of Latina State
(00:33):
of Mind.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
This is Xenia.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
This is Diana.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
And this is Nancy.
How are you guys?
Speaker 1 (00:39):
Good, how are you?
I'm good.
We're going to be talking todayabout modern relationships and
love and family.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Yeah, are y'all ready , ready?
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Yeah, I'm ready to talk some shit, as she usually
is.
Nothing new, nothing new.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
I think so.
This topic is reallyinteresting to me because I
always thought I wanted a verytrue.
I still think that I have avery traditional relationship,
but the more I think about it,the more I realize that I don't
that like I live in a moremodern relationship.
Um, but, like you know, I grewup religious, so, like for me,
(01:23):
like the goal was to have atraditional and what was?
Speaker 2 (01:27):
yeah, what was your perspective, what's your view of
it?
Speaker 3 (01:29):
yeah, that's exactly what I was gonna ask too, so it
was just um.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
The man is a provider and I stay at home, mom, and I
do all the cooking and cleaningand I'm the one that takes care
of the children and.
I do the sewing and likeliterally all that.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Go gather the fruits and the veggies.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Yeah, I have my little garden and, yeah, make
bread from scratch and all thefun stuff, two kids, three kids,
no like five, five kids, twoand a half.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
Two and a half is the .
Speaker 1 (02:05):
That's the average.
The average, yeah, like five,two and a half.
That's the average.
That's a modern average.
I wanted five or six.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
Oh jeez, you want him to work out on the farm and
stuff like that yeah, exactly asJerome shakes his head.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
What?
Speaker 2 (02:22):
Is he a city boy?
City boy, I think so, and whatis your perspective now?
Oh, no, 100.
None of that, but I didn't knowbetter yeah I didn't know
better you were kind of blindedby religion, I think so I think
(02:42):
a lot of it is guided byreligion.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
I think the same goes in Catholicism, which is what I
grew up in learning knowingabout Same Men, women, children.
The man is the provider working.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
And mom stays at home and watches the kids and does
all the housework.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
And you know, in our relationship now, my husband
does go to work and I stay homewith the baby.
But the difference is that I'mnot expected to like have a
spotless, clean home and I'm notexpected to have dinner ready
on the table when he gets here,you mean he's not going to beat
you up.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Yeah, exactly what.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
You know, I don't, I'm not expected to rub his feet
as he gets home and you know,like I'm not expected to do all
those things, if anything.
Like he gets home and I get abreak.
Like he gets home and he says,hey, it's time for your break.
Like give me the baby and go,he clocks in yeah, go basically,
and then right, like clocks outand clocks in, and then we, we
(03:44):
share this responsibility of ababy that we both made Exactly.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Because you both made them.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
And he thinks like it's really interesting to see
it, because he thinks that thisis standard.
Like we were just talking aboutthis.
He was like because I told himhow impressed I am, I like how
good he is with our baby andlike how much help he gives me
and how amazing it all is and hewas like this is standard, like
this is what should be done,but this is not what it's done,
(04:13):
like for a lot of women, likethey don't get the help that
they need from their partnerswhen it comes to the children
like.
I know for a fact that if I wasworking as well as having a
baby at home, like I, would havethe exact same help that I have
now like I would, or more likeright, and that's the difference
(04:34):
between that traditional andmodern relationship yeah yes I
am not currently in arelationship, so I don't know
how well I can talk about this,but but you know, you have an
idea and you've seen
Speaker 2 (04:47):
yeah, and one thing one of my biggest requirements
to have like a family, to havekids, is that the dad like the
father of my kids is an actualdad, is an actual father like
takes care of the child we bothmade.
Yeah, I don't want to be thesoul and I feel like it happens
a lot and that's why divorce ishappening a lot, because the mom
(05:09):
usually shares most of theresponsibility of taking care of
the house.
Uh, a lot of times they'reprofessional, the profession and
the kids as well.
Yeah, um, and so at least oneof my requirements, I I don't
mind.
I've been taught to work.
My parents taught me to work,whether it was my brothers or me
(05:29):
like a girl, I've been taughtto do that, so I don't have an
issue with that, but I do need,I do require the partner to give
in some equal help.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
But I will not have children if I don't have like a
good partner in that sense.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Yeah, that's one of the things of modern
relationships also, I think.
No, well, people are stillexpected to do things, but I
feel like a lot of people noware deciding not to have kids,
like that's something thatpeople are choosing for
themselves.
Yeah, good for them.
I think it's still questioned alot by especially by like their
(06:07):
parents, which grew up in adifferent generation.
But yeah, I feel like creatinga family for a lot of people
doesn't necessarily involvehaving kids, yeah, yeah, and I
get that a lot.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
It's got questioned a lot and I think, well, there's
a reason why people don't wantto have kids because having kids
is hard.
It's how it's hard and theymaybe didn't receive the
attention that they would haverequired, so they don't want to
pass along that too if theycan't do that to their child,
why would they have a child?
Speaker 3 (06:37):
yeah.
If they don't want to, whywould they?
Yeah, right, like they justdon't want to spend money on
that.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
I mean mean on a child, Not that Sorry I think
one of the things also and I'venoticed this a lot is that there
are a lot of married singleparents or, like single women,
single mothers.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
Like they're married but they don't have the support
Right, so they're technicallysingle mothers.
And not only that, sometimesthey're raising their husband or
their partner right, which Ithink is like I have.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
I know a lot of people who have relationships
where the woman is expected todo everything that has to do
with the kids.
Like a kid needs a bath youhandle it.
Kids need to eat you handle it.
They need a diaper change youhandle it.
And at that point, what's thepoint?
You know like, yeah might aswell, just yeah, like might as
well be single sticking updivorce the man yeah hopefully
(07:34):
get some uh, uh.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
What's it called um child support, support and?
You're doing it on your ownanyway you were already doing it
on your own.
Let's get some kind offinancial stability.
I mean, unfortunately that'snot the case for all the um
cases, but still yeah, it'sinteresting.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
I'm in a relationship with a woman, so modern
relationship for sure the awardthe most modern relationship.
Um, yeah, so it's interesting tothink about anything like that,
like household chores or whoworks or who doesn't, because I
mean whoever works works, andwhoever is there and can do the
(08:15):
things does the things, and,yeah, we both work together to
get stuff done, and that's it Ifeel like, but I feel like the
men have been raised to notnotice, yeah, yeah like it's
there, the dirty dishes might bethere yeah but there might be
taught to not notice them, tonot acknowledge it and not
acknowledge when the dishes areclean.
(08:38):
Do you know what I think it isalso?
I think right, I don't know for, but I think a lot of it is too
that some men feel like becausethey're going to work.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
They're done.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
They have done what they should be doing, without
taking into consideration howmuch work it is being at home.
Especially if you have kids,it's a lot of work.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
Bro, I live by myself and it's tough bro, I have to
clean after myself.
A lot of these men don't evenclean after themselves, don't
clean after their children,don't clean after their partner
so yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
I think a lot of it is that they feel like they've
contributed enough by workingwithout thinking about how much
work it takes if they have apartner who's female and is at
home doing everything bring meback two paychecks and I'll do
whatever I can.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
That's what I used.
Okay, let me chime in becausehere's the thing.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
I felt so like, oh my gosh, please, it's like as a
female, I was like it's easy,like just be.
It's like as a female, I waslike it's easy, like just be
home, you know, like clean andjust clean yourself and just be
home.
I've been a stay at home momfor about a month, two months.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
So just a little bit of experience.
This shit is hard yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Because there are times when baby does not want to
be put down and he screams andcries.
If I put him down and I don'thave the heart to let my child
cry for 10 minutes while I takea shower and just let him like
scream his little lungs out, I'mnot.
I'm not that kind of personthat's like, if you, if you, if
you do that, it's up to you, um,yeah, um.
(10:22):
But then you know, like I haveto figure out a way to like kind
of clean up the house whilesometimes having to carry him,
while sometimes putting him down, if he lets me while taking
care of myself while figuringout how to do dishes.
Well, maybe, um, I had time totake out the chicken or the meat
(10:43):
or whatever it is for dinner,but it's a process and it's hard
and it's like you have to beavailable to feed.
You have to be available and,like, a lot of the times, by the
time Jerome gets home, I'moverstimulated and I'm just like
like I just need 10 minutes tonot be touched, like because
that baby's on you the entiretime and you know and that's
(11:04):
great because you're his safetyand that's who what the baby
wants to be but how sad it is toto feel all those things and
not have a partner that getshome to you and says, hey, here,
give me a baby, I'll take abreak you don't have.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
You, don't you right?
You're a safety to your child.
But who's a safety to you?
To me, yeah, especially withpostpartum like your hormones
are like crazy right.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
So that's another dynamic.
So like not only are we dealingwith this relationship, that's
modern to us because we're notdoing with the traditional thing
I don't cook, I don't like tocook like it's not my thing, I
don't like it, I don't find anyjoy in cooking like I don't like
it I burn things like I stopped.
(11:47):
If I cook, I cook because I havea craving of something I know
how to make, but it's notsomething that gives me a lot of
joy, like it makes me sad tosay it because I wish I I like
to cook but we've also beenconditioned that we are supposed
to know how to yes, and that'sanother thing you know, like,
like you're a bad wife if youcan't exactly now this trader,
joe's meal is gonna sufficeexactly trader joe's for the win
(12:11):
the kung fu chicken, kung paochicken yum but then you feel,
as a woman, like I have felt sobad and I have put so much of my
(12:31):
worth in a traditional marriageand I have been like so hard on
myself for not cooking for him,for not having a spotless house
, for not having my makeup done,for not looking a certain way.
Man, I'm trying like every dayI'm like I'm gonna get a.
I brush my teeth and I gottashower today.
He let me shower today and Iput a little mascara on and I
(12:54):
won today.
You know, like every day isdifferent and so like I'm so
grateful that I don't havesomebody that's coming home and
yelling at me for not beingfully make makeup done and for
not having dinner on the tableand for you know and this is a
man that provides for you and,exactly like men that are not
providing, are doing this, andthat's the yeah, that's a whole
(13:17):
nother story.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Evaluate your life if you're not providing.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
But yet here you are demanding right right and so,
like I see, I think about likethe women that came before me in
their traditional marriage andI'm like how the hell did they
do that?
Because this, this is hard, andthey had like six or seven kids
, yeah yeah have one.
Imagine when you have two.
No, I can't, she doesn't wantto.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
No I get it.
I feel like maybe I can talkabout my parents' relationship.
My dad was a provider.
My mom was also a provider and,yeah, he was a good dad, just
kidding.
No, he was a great dad becauseshe provided, he provided, and
then they both took care of thechildren.
(14:05):
My siblings and I, we were bothtaken care of by them.
It wasn't just like, oh, it'sjust mom or it's just dad, no,
it was both of them, and whetherthey were fighting or not or
whatever, they would still Likethey were still our parents
Still divided them.
Yeah, exactly, you know likedoesn't matter what was going on
with them.
They were still always ourparents and so that's kind of
(14:28):
maybe that's why I have myrequirement that I need someone
like that in my life, becauseI'll be able to provide.
They might be able to providebut, like, both of them need to
provide to the children that youboth made.
But I don't know how my mom didit.
She worked and took care oflike usually most of mostly four
of us I'm like you, go girl.
Speaker 1 (14:49):
One of the things I have heard is that we have the
most involved fathers in thisgeneration.
Like, um, this generation hasthe fathers that are most
involved in the in theirchildren's life, and I, like, I
think that's pretty cool like Isee my husband, with my, with,
with our kid, and I think howlucky is my, my, my baby that he
(15:09):
gets a dad that's like fullyinvolved and like it's there all
the time.
And I see my brothers withtheir kids and they're like so
into it.
My dad was pretty involved withus, like he was um, but I think
it's really cool.
You know like we have that thisgeneration.
Another thing that these modernrelationships are doing is like
we're having open relationshipspeople have open marriages and
(15:33):
that's something you didn't like.
Maybe it was a hush hush thinglike there was an arrangement.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Yeah, thing back in the day I'm sure it was a thing.
Speaker 3 (15:41):
I think there's always been a thing, but I think
now people are allowed to areallowed to say it and be open
about it, Right right.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Yeah, bring in whoever you need to bring in.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
Yeah, I think that's kind of part of what being in a
modern relationship is is kindof choosing whatever works for
you and your family, whateverthat means to you, even because
I know a lot of women also justwant to be home with kids and,
yeah, like good for you that'syour choice.
That's the beauty about itexactly being able to make
(16:16):
decisions what feminism, yeah,yeah and I feel like I mean
that's great, right, if they canand that's what they want and
that works out for them, that'sperfect.
But also having the choice tonot just wait for a man to come
home and have dinner ready forthem or whatever, if that's not
what you really want to do, yeahyeah, for sure.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
I think that it's so important, like when we're, when
you're one of the conversationsand and this might be a part of
a we're when you're one of theconversations and and this might
be a part of a more modernrelationship too like one of the
conversations I had with withmy husband, before we even
thought about marriage, is if,if you and I ever had a kid and
our kid came out as gay,transgender or whatever that,
what would your reaction be?
(17:00):
and he said I don't know, I'dlove the kid like it's my kid
and that was for me like such animportant conversation to have,
because I have a lot of friendsthat are part of that community
and I I, if my child was thatis that, um, I'm not gonna
disown them, I'm not gonna kickthem out, and but you know how
(17:21):
does your partner feel about it.
You know, and those areconversations we're not, we were
not having before and we'rehaving now, and that was an
important part of myrelationship, because I didn't
want to have a fight like that,like I didn't want anybody to
make my kid feel less thanbecause of whatever, whoever
they are.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
Right, you know.
So that was a green flag, forsure, that was a super green
flag.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
And that was for me an important conversation.
You know 100 an importantconversation and a lot of the
conversation starts with the doyou want to have kids?
Conversation yeah but, yes, alot of these conversations are
being had now, whether openrelationship, whether closed
relationship.
Kids, no kids what happens ifthe kids don't turn out the
quote-unquote traditional way.
(18:08):
What if they think differently,work differently, and that
works with, uh, whatever genderis going on, or sexuality, but
also with the like diseases ornot diseases, but like
disabilities yeah that that's.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
That should be embedded in the conversation as
well yeah, maybe that's part ofit too, just having
conversations about everythingand both partners being able to
have an opinion and validatingeach other's opinions and making
sure that you're on the samepage about things before
committing.
I think before it was just likemore about maybe, well at first
(18:45):
, something that made sense forthe families.
Right like you marry someonewho helped your family grow or
whatever, yeah and then maybemore attraction than anything
else.
But now I feel like we're alsohaving conversations like Diana.
Like you were saying, yourequire that someone provides
this for you or brings this tothe table for you.
I think we to the table for you.
I think we're more open totalking about things like that
(19:07):
when we find someone who can bea potential partner.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Yeah, because I feel like most of us want to find a
person that we're going to bewith for the rest of our lives
and pick the right one.
Yeah, ask the right questionsto get there.
Speaker 3 (19:20):
Yeah, but even divorce now is more common and
part of like I don't know likeblended families blended
families.
I think that's great yeah it'smore of the modern yeah way, I
suppose yeah different dynamics.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
People are not staying for the kids as they
were yes, yes, yes, yes, veryimportant I think it's, I think
think it's great, great, yeah, Imean, why make them go through
whatever you're going with yourpartner, right?
If you can provide a saferspace, then try to do that.
Speaker 3 (19:52):
Yeah, If you can.
Yeah for sure.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
I think one of the key things is also like having
relationships that make youhappy.
You know, Like I feel like alot of the times I know I did it
before like you feel lonely andyou settle into something that
feels kind of comfortable orkind of okay, like they give you
like enough, yeah, enough yeah,but I feel like that also
(20:18):
doesn't bring you the most joy.
And if you follow like I don'tknow, like if you know who you
are and you know what you want,then you should be able to have
those conversations with yourpartner or the person you're
attracted to or you're going tostart a relationship with, and
and really find like, reallyfind like the key things that
(20:40):
are important for you and thatwill make you like happy.
You know, like that that bringsyou joy and makes you the
happiest yeah, that should bethe goal in life, right, yeah?
Speaker 3 (20:51):
should be it should be yeah do you think diana or
yesenia, or both of you?
If your partner male lost theirjob, like if you had a partner
right?
Speaker 2 (21:03):
now makes for reminding me, and they stayed
home.
Speaker 3 (21:06):
Would you guys be okay with that, with being the
provider of the home?
Speaker 2 (21:10):
I yeah yeah I would be okay if I was still working
and my partner lost their job.
Speaker 1 (21:16):
I would be okay with them being the stay-at-home
parent I wasn't okay with thatat that, like at one point I
thought it was like the weirdest, like I was because of that
traditional right that I had yep, I was like no way, like I
can't, I'm never gonna support aman blah blah.
But now I understand.
It's like you know, if he's tolose his job and I have a job
(21:37):
like, and I can provide for ourfamily why not?
yeah, why not if he stays withbaby.
Yeah, I'll do it Like that'd begreat Like.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
I personally would almost prefer it.
Yeah, because I don't know.
Men need to learn what it'slike to stay at home, and it's
going to build a differentrelationship, at least with your
children.
It's going to build a differentrelationship, maybe a closer
one with their dad, where wedon't see that.
It happens very often, uh, orit didn't happen very often, but
(22:05):
I, I wouldn't mind it.
I personally wouldn't mind it,um, but yeah, why not?
Speaker 1 (22:10):
yeah yeah I feel like it's a I think a lot of the
times like I had so many likereally uh hard opinions about
certain things, and the more Ithink about it, the more I'm
like well, yeah, because youknow I was.
I feel like I was conditionedto feel those things you know I
felt like I was told, like thisis the right way, like this is
(22:33):
the way that it's alwayssupposed to be the only way that
you're supposed to do it.
And when things didn't feel thatway, I was always like, no,
that's not right.
And then I was like, wait, whyisn't it right?
Speaker 2 (22:43):
because you, you know if someone else says yeah
that's it.
Speaker 3 (22:47):
But it feels right for that family, for that right
you know like, then it's greatyeah, we're all so different and
going through so many differentthings that obviously we're all
gonna need different thingsyeah, in our family structures
or dynamics, not aone-size-fits-all.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
Yeah, I mean, we've experienced so much already with
the pandemic that there'slikely a lot of individuals that
had to stay at home right thatwere required to stay at home
and a lot of other individualswere able to keep going to work.
So it happens and sometimesit's natural like forces you
know, you don't it's not youwillingly doing this, you just
(23:25):
have to do it because, lifebecause there's a pandemic going
on um, we are in the talks, Iguess, of like a war and then
being involved in it.
I'll guess.
Guess who goes to war?
Usually, yeah, men.
So there's going to be a periodthat there may be more women in
(23:46):
the workforce.
So and this isn't the firsttime, unfortunately, that it's
happened, so it's used to ithopefully it gets more,
unfortunately, normalized atleast in this scenario, in this
case um it's hard to talk, butsomething we need to talk about
yeah, for sure yeah, how do wefeel about men being drafted to
(24:07):
go to war?
Speaker 1 (24:08):
um, I think war is stupid and it shouldn't be
freaking happening.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
So that's my first thought yeah it is what it is, I
guess, yeah, I, it's tough,it's tough to think about, it's
tough to talk about it.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
It's yeah, I think you should go to war if you want
to go to war.
I don't think people should bedrafted to go to war.
Speaker 3 (24:27):
They don't think anybody should be made to go to
war if they don't want to goright like yeah, yeah, it's not
like you started.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
Traditional you started your war and now you're
making people go fight becauseyou wanted to fight it and make
them, but you're not sending anyof your family members to fight
this war, so yeah, no, it's,it's very unfortunate, it's but
there's, and what we're talkingis like there's a lot of these
scenarios there.
It's, it's a have to you knowyou have to.
Speaker 3 (24:55):
There's no kind of want to.
No choice in the matter.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
Yeah, exactly, yeah, right but hey, at least women
and men are being drafted thistime around, I think I'm not
sure.
Well, I'm too old, so I'm goodI won't make it my knees are too
bad for this my knees don'twork.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
I would fail that physical test real quick real
quick.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
The first thing right , you have to run a mile.
Oh, I can't man, if you give mea red bull, I'll do it well
just kidding, I'll be anxiousthe whole time, oh man is there
a um, is there a relationship, amodern relationship type that
(25:50):
you would, that you feel likeyou wouldn't be a part of that.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
You feel like in your heart, you, you just couldn't
open relationship yeah, I don'tthink I can do it no uh-uh, it's
not for me it wouldn't bring mehappiness exactly a lot of
anger I would do it, but then Iwouldn't let my partner do it,
and I recognize that that is notfair well, but it works for
(26:13):
some people, so you might beable to find someone who's okay
with that I don't want them tobe okay with that, though like
I'm so complicated I know I likethe idea flag of like them not
doing that to me either, likethem not being able to think
about me being able to do thatwith someone else what, what,
(26:33):
what you know, uh, how do Iexplain it?
Speaker 3 (26:36):
like I don't want them to be okay with you being
with somebody else.
Yeah, you want that.
You want them to be possessiveof you a little bit.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
That's the red flag.
I didn't want to say it thoughI don't want to be like I
understand, yeah, I didn't wantto say it because I don't.
I don't want people to thinkthat this is how I feel yeah,
but you are okay, but I am right.
Speaker 3 (26:56):
But who are we kidding?
Speaker 2 (26:57):
yeah, exactly, I know who I am.
That's fine.
No, but I don't think I'd beable to do it for that reason
yeah, I don't see, and yeah,yeah, same I would absolutely
not.
Speaker 1 (27:12):
I know, I don't, I, I don't think I know for a fact
that I couldn't do it it wouldbe too difficult, right, it
would just be, and I think it'sreally interesting for um
polyamorous relationships wherethey have like all together, all
together, right that's myanswer yeah, you want to do a
(27:32):
poly I want to have twoboyfriends, two husbands and
them be part of.
Speaker 3 (27:39):
We're all like romantically involved too, all
of us.
Oh, okay, that could.
You could find that I couldfind that I don't know for sure.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Do I have to move to utah for that?
Speaker 1 (27:47):
no, no, no I don't think I could do poly either,
like that would be too difficultwe uh are watching or we're
watching um couples therapy.
Speaker 3 (28:04):
I don't know if you guys have seen that show so good
um paramount with showtime okayso good, but they had a one of
the.
It's not a couple, it's apolycule okay so it's how many
individuals?
Speaker 2 (28:20):
three yeah the man is in a relationship with both of
the women okay, but the womenare not in a relationship with
each other okay, and they alsohave other partners wow very
interesting and this is like areal thing yeah yeah, yeah, it's
part of the poly, yeah, it'spart of yeah, I mean there's a
lot of new designations, sowe're here, we're out here
(28:41):
learning yeah, that would besuper complicated for me yeah,
yeah yeah, because it's like toomany people to keep track of
but too many feelings for me toto to keep track of.
Speaker 1 (28:54):
Like I feel like I love the monogamous relationship
because I only have to focus onone person and I can give my
all to that person.
That person can give, like youknow, to that.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
I feel like if I had to do more than that, it would
be so complicated you know,you've got a point actually,
like you've got to worry aboutone person's feelings and then
the other person's feelings andmake sure that they don't
confuse their feelings.
It could get a little confusingwith that, but it's cool that
(29:26):
it works for some people rightInstead.
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Of being forced to be in a monogamous relationship
where they're going to be havingfeelings for other people as
well and hurting this personbecause they can't just have one
partner.
Speaker 2 (29:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
Good for them.
If everyone involved is Onboard, great, go for it I think
that's the key and that's whatmakes it modern Right.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
So like.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
You have to be on board, you have to talk about.
They have these conversations.
Speaker 3 (29:53):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
Openly about what you're looking for in that
relationship.
I'm going to be in a polyrelationship.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
I'm going relationship.
I'm gonna be in a polyrelationship.
I'm gonna have this.
Yeah, this is what the rulesadults, yeah, consenting adults.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
This is what the rule is gonna be.
This is where our standards,this is where our bottom lines
boundaries, all that you have totalk about, all those things
yeah, that's a lot of work yeahand if you do it and if it's and
it works, it's awesome yeah,exactly, yeah yeah, so shout out
to those people.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
Hopefully we learn more about that, because I it's
interesting new yeah, and it'scompletely yeah, 100%,
interesting yeah, you guysshould watch that show, though.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
It's really good I watched like a few episodes and
I was so annoyed with a lot ofthe males in this I wonder if it
was season two, because there'sseason one.
Speaker 3 (30:40):
Okay, yeah, and some of these guys were just like
idiots, it's like not idiotsthey're just so emotionally not
like yeah they're like they justthat connection was not yeah,
it's, it's interesting, it's aninteresting show yeah, yeah, but
it is really interesting yeahbut I don't think I could do
that, I don't think I could winan opportunity no, no it would
(31:01):
be too difficult for meboyfriends.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
I'm okay with that, yeah you, can we?
That would be poly for you,yeah, yeah I would love that
send your applications to lsomunderscore podcast.
What do you mean?
Speaker 1 (31:15):
dan, I don't know if you could share that attention,
though.
What do you?
Speaker 2 (31:19):
mean, no, I'm getting the attention, yeah, but then
you still have to give thatattention to two, do you mean?
No, I'm getting the attention,yeah, but then you still have to
give that attention to twopeople.
Speaker 3 (31:24):
No, I don't it's gonna be a one-way relationship
okay, she has two boyfriends,but she doesn't have to love
them they just or I would lovethem, though you know that
relationship would be sub domokay with both of them right um,
not what I was thinking, butwhy not yeah?
Speaker 2 (31:47):
why not?
Speaker 3 (31:48):
like make it even more interesting.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Maybe we can have this conversation again with
people that have different yeah,well no, the people that have
like different relationshiptypes and just like a monogamous
modern relationship.
Do we know anyone?
I don't know anyone, but if any, of our listeners want to come
yeah talk to us and have a funrelationship like that.
Speaker 2 (32:15):
Yeah, I don't, or not fun.
Even if it's not fun, just letus into the drama.
Speaker 3 (32:20):
Yeah, if you've had some experience with that?
That'd be cool.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
We'll make sure you don't say names, real people's
names, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
It would be such an interestingtopic though it's something
that we're not used to seeing.
We're only used to seeing thetraditional male and female and
we're finally breaking out intolike female, female, male, male.
Speaker 3 (32:55):
Woo, woo and female, and we're finally breaking out
into like female, female, it'snot pride anymore, but I know
it's always pride, always pridein uh nancy's heart.
In my world it's always no, itshould always be pride in
everybody's world.
Yeah, diana, come on, get onboard isn't there like a single
where's?
Speaker 2 (33:02):
no, not a single.
It's valentine's day februaryyeah, yeah that's that's why
they get a short month.
It's fine.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
It's fine, they can deal um, I think we're done
talking yeah, yeah, this was agreat conversation, great yeah
let's find people.
Speaker 3 (33:24):
Unless we don't have anything else.
I don't think so Just go home.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
It's been a long day.
Bye bitches.
How about some of the Diana'sDaily shit?
Here we go.
Here we go what you got today.
Speaker 2 (33:41):
We're going to have a tough conversation.
It's not a tough conversationSort of.
It's whatever I know.
No, it's important.
So recently, in May, louisianadesignated abortion pills as
controlled substance deaths.
So I know, so, I know.
(34:09):
So, meaning that having beingin possession of I'm not going
to say the names of the actualmedications because I can't but
having possessing these itemswithout a prescription could
send you to jail and it couldcost you thousands of dollars in
fines, you, thousands ofdollars in fines.
Um, so here once again, the us,or in this case, the state
(34:31):
restriction restricting accessto abortion pills or taking care
of I don't know how to say it,but like women's choice, health
care well, health care exactlythank you, yeah like, because
not only does this medicationcould help for this, but also it
could be necessary for otherthings, and this restriction is
going to restrict um, what's itcalled?
(34:51):
Doctors I couldn't think ofthat uh medical professionals
from prescribing it to otherindividuals that may or may not
need it.
Um, so it's becoming tiring tocontinue hearing of this
conversation that there's moreand more restrictions on what a
woman can and cannot do with herbody.
Um, once again, it's a lot ofmales doing this, yep, that have
(35:15):
no need for this that willnever have the need for this,
that they will never be facedwith a choice, a difficult
choice, of keeping it or ofkeeping a pregnancy or not.
Speaker 3 (35:29):
Or who might have already done something like this
.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
A lot of times, a lot of these people in power have
the option and have the fundsand have the means to go to
another state to receive thistype of health care yeah, they
and they have done it, but theywon't, but they won't, but they
won't allow you to do it right,not the people in your state,
but they can.
But they have the funds and themeans could go get taken care of
(35:54):
, like safely right um, so it'sobviously hypocrism, but it's so
unfortunate that we still haveto continue talking about this
conversation, that we still getrestricted on what we can do
with our bodies or not.
And, like I said, it's whitemales doing this restriction
when they themselves havepartaken in one way or another
(36:15):
by sending their mistresses,their whatever, to another state
to be taken care of and it'sbeen.
This has been known for.
There's reports of many, uhprofessionals doing this, or I
guess not professionals, butlike people in government having
the ability to do this.
Yep, it's been a thing sincelike the 60s, I don't know.
(36:36):
It's been a thing for a reallylong time and people don't
notice it and people are againstpro-choice and they should just
believe in the choice.
That's all we're asking.
Speaker 3 (36:47):
At least that's all I'm asking just the choice right
of the being able to keep it ornot right, it's ridiculous that
we're still having thisconversation at this point.
Speaker 1 (36:56):
It's, yeah, the saddest thing is like we are
seeing so many women that aregoing through like some really
scary health issues becausethey're not allowed to get an
abortion for like a fetus.
That's not viable or like allthese things that are happening
to their bodies and they're not.
They're getting like in troublefor trying to go to a different
(37:20):
state to get the help they need, and so I think that's like one
of the saddest things you know.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
Like you're, you're killing women and the thing is
that, okay, you're not allowingthem to have an abortion.
So when the kid, and you're soprotecting of that kid's life
while it's in the womb, but whathappens when they kill it, when
the kid is born?
They're like oh, don't usestate funds.
Don't use whatever federalbenefits.
Speaker 3 (37:45):
Yeah, they don't even want to give free lunches at
schools.
Speaker 1 (37:47):
That's the most ridiculous shit.
Speaker 3 (37:49):
I've ever heard.
Speaker 1 (37:49):
I heard somebody say they are not pro-life, they're
pro-birth.
Yeah, because after those kidsare born, you're not doing
anything for their lives.
Speaker 2 (38:00):
You're being judged for being a single mother in a
lot of cases when that couldhave been avoided if they would
have been allowed to terminatethe pregnancy because they knew
that the father was not going tobe in the picture.
So, like you're going to judgethem but you're going to do
nothing about it, you're goingto force them to have the child.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
Make it make sense, please yeah, it doesn't, it
doesn't, it doesn't.
Speaker 3 (38:21):
It's ridiculous, it is ridiculous, it's such a sad
conversation to have.
Speaker 2 (38:24):
Honestly, it really is Because we just want the
choice.
That's it.
I bet you a lot of women arenot going to go running to
terminate their pregnancy.
Speaker 1 (38:33):
No, but that's what people are making it sound like.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
But no, like they just want, we just want the
choice yeah that's it.
It's so sad, but so angeringyeah, just super yeah, yeah, I
can't even comprehend how we'rehere yeah, it's, and a lot of
these, unfortunately, and a lotof in lisiana, where this
happened.
In abuse is very common andpregnancies from that abuse can
(39:03):
be common and they can't eventerminate because of that or
they can't use thisquote-unquote controlled
substance for that yeah that'sunfortunate sad I'm sorry that I
brought you guys down, but it'sa conversation we need to have
no, seriously though it's
Speaker 3 (39:17):
just, it's just a matter of having a choice,
that's all, yeah, we'll have tohave an episode and talk about
it a little more.
Speaker 2 (39:25):
Yeah, we should cover it a little bit more so we can
all be angry.
I'm just kidding, we all areangry, the entire episode just
angry.
Speaker 3 (39:32):
Yes, what's wrong with that?
Speaker 1 (39:33):
I'm just kidding I feel like it's.
I was trying to Google this,but there are so many of these
states that are like so againstabortion are also the states
with the lowest age for marriage.
For like little ones can getmarried.
I feel like that in itselfshould tell you something like
(39:54):
these people are sick yeah.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
They have some sort of weird kink fantasy.
I don't know, I don't get it.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
I don't get what the whole obsession is with women
having children but then thesame children that are ringing
to this world to just be abused,yeah right, yeah, I don't know,
we could probably get reallydeep into this I know there's,
yeah, there's so much we'll keepit, we'll keep it light for
this one time, I know right toofar too far any closing thoughts
(40:27):
on modern relationships um.
Speaker 3 (40:32):
Thank you for the award of the most modern
relationship in the room you'rewelcome.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
I just want to say thank you, you're welcome.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
No, I'm just kidding.
Um, I think I mean for me.
I'm just glad that people aremore open to respecting people's
choices.
Speaker 2 (40:50):
It's kind of the same thing we're talking about with
abortion like it's nobody'sbusiness if they're not hurting
anyone if they're adultsconsenting consenting adults.
Speaker 3 (41:00):
It makes it, it makes them happy, like they just let
them be whatever choice theywant to make and have the
relationships they want to haveand the family they want to have
, and I don't see why that's aproblem your unhappiness should
not affect someone else'shappiness yep exactly yeah, um,
I feel like ask the questionsbefore you get into a
(41:22):
relationship.
Speaker 1 (41:23):
Be modern enough to get to know your partner.
Those things are really trulymatter to you.
Make sure that you see eye toeye in the important things.
At the end of the day, it'syour relationship and do
whatever the hell you want withit, if you want to become a
stay-at-home mom or dad thentalk about it.
Speaker 2 (41:45):
Talk about it with your partner, because they'll
most likely be on board on it,and if not, well, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (41:51):
And if you don't want to have kids, don't have kids,
don't have kids.
They're expensive, they're alot of work, but I don't want to
work and I want to spend moneyon me.
Speaker 2 (42:01):
I'm just kidding, but honestly.
I do yeah, and personally, I'mjust grateful that my parents
showed me a different type ofrelationship, so that's me
helping me get a betterrelationship.
Yeah For sure, cool, all right.
Speaker 1 (42:17):
So por también Love you guys, see you Bye, bye.
Speaker 3 (42:22):
Thank you for listening to Latina State of
Mind, produced by us, yourawesome hosts, diana, xenia and
Yancy.
Special shout out to Jerome,our editor.
Don't forget to follow us onInstagram at lsom underscore
podcast, and on Facebook atLatina State of Mind.
Hasta la proxima.
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