Rising Above Self-Doubt Through Faith & Creation: Cassidy Beck's Story - Latter-Day Lights - LDS Podcast "Latter-Day Lights" - Inspirational LDS Stories

Episode Transcript
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Scott Brandley (00:00):
Hey there, as a Latter Day Lights listener, I
want to give you a very specialgift today.
My brand new book, Faith toStay.
This book is filled withinspiring stories, powerful
discoveries, and even freshinsights to help strengthen your
faith during the storms oflife.
So, if you're looking to beinspired, uplifted, and

(00:21):
spiritually recharged, justvisit faith2stay.com.
Now, let's get back to theshow.
Hey everyone, I'm ScottBranley.

Alisha Coakley (00:31):
And I'm Alisha Coakley.
Every member of the church hasa story to share, one that can
instill faith, invite growth,and inspire others.

On today's episode, we're going to hear how
facing imposter syndrome isfueling one woman's passion to
inspire others to rise aboveself-doubt and walk confidently
in their divine destiny.
Welcome to Latter Day Lights.
We're so glad you're here withus today, and we're really

(01:08):
excited to introduce our specialguest, Cassidy Beck, to the
show.
Welcome, Cassidy.

Cassidy Beck (01:13):
Thanks so much, Scott.
Thanks, Alisha, for having me.

Yeah, of course.
We always love being able tocollaborate with fellow
podcasters.
It's like, ah, you're notnervous at all.
We're totally fine.

Let's stick with that.
I am a little bit nervous.
I think like my role is totallydifferent.
So I have done a whole lot ofinterviews, but this is my very
first on this side of it.
So I I am excited.
I'm very excited to be here.

Good, good.
I always tell my kids the onlydifference between fear and
excitement is the meaning thatyou give to the feeling that
you're having.
So like you can still get thebutterflies in your stomach and
the sweaty palms and theelevated heart rate and all of
those physical feelings areexactly the same.
So just go with excitement.

(02:04):
You're excited, you're notscared.

That's right.
I love it.

Yeah.
Perfect.
Well, Cassidy, why don't you uhtake a second to tell our
listeners a little bit moreabout yourself?

Great.
So my name is Cassidy.
Um, as Alisha mentioned before,I am a podcaster and it was
really fun.
I had the opportunity to uhspeak with both Scott and Alisha
before on my podcast.
And I just I feel like therewere a lot of things I really
connected with you and justwanted to further the
conversation.
Um, so I've spent the majorityof my life living in Utah.

(02:39):
Uh, just a little bit over twoyears ago, um, my husband and
myself and our three kids movedto Meridian, Idaho.
And it was quite a time oftransition for me because uh we
knew one person, we knew onefamily in the entire state.
And in addition to that, liketrying to come in and get

(03:01):
settled, my youngest daughter itwas going into the first grade.
And for what that meant to uswas that this was the first time
that she had been in all daykindergarten, like that she had
been in school all day.
All of my kids were in schoolall day, and so it was
interesting because I had allthese questions of who am I?

(03:25):
And what is my purpose?
And I had more time to kind ofstew in it.
And so I feel like a lot oftimes um as Latter-day Saints,
we are a purpose-driven peopleand we need to fill that
purpose.
And there are a lot of timesthat we're in transition, and I

(03:45):
feel like when you were on oursh my show, that was one of the
things that came up then witheach of you going through
different transitions, and so Ikind of wanted to talk about
that self-doubt and impostersyndrome and fear uh that kind
of motivates both the podcastand a lot of my writing.

Gotcha.
I love that.
Well, I think we just get to itthen.
How's that sound?
You wanna go ahead and tell uswhere your story all begins?

Let's do it.
Okay.
So um the story starts with mydad.
Um, he woke up one day, he hada pain in his back, and we
didn't know at the time, um, butwhat was happening, he had an
infection in his spine that wasum deteriorating the discs in

(04:39):
his spinal cord, and it it wasso aggressive that he had bone
on bone in his spinal column.
And so there was a period oftime that was very difficult
where he was totally immobile.
Um and kind of during thattime, I had noticed a little bit

(05:01):
of a trend, and that was whenmy family went to go visit my
parents, there was just kind ofa natural gravitation that would
happen.
And I would go just kind ofchat with my mom.
Meanwhile, my husband wouldplop down next to my dad and
kind of just talk with him.
And I was talking with myoldest sister, and I I had

(05:22):
wanted to do something, I wantedto engage with him in a
meaningful way that would kindof um, I guess, disrupt this
natural rhythm that we hadgotten into.
And he was able to get surgeryon his spine, and so that he was
able to get uh his independenceand some mobility back.

(05:46):
And during that time, it wasabout a year, I interviewed him
and I worked with him to writehis life story.
We talked about his childhood,we talked about going through
high school.
He is a very successfulbusinessman.
We talked about his success inbusiness, um, and we talked

(06:08):
about his relationship.
Um so he was 78 years old, andthat time where he was not able
to move really took away, and hepassed away before we could
finish the book.

(06:29):
And at that time, there weretwo things that were there, like
that I knew immediately.
Um, the first thing was thathis story needed to be shared.
Um, I had to finish it, and thesecond thing that I knew was it
felt impossible to do itwithout him.

(06:50):
Um I would sit at the computerand I would just weep.
I it is very hard to write asyou can't see anything on the
screen.
I haven't experienced writer'sblock before, but that was just
it was just a solid cement wallthat nothing could come on the

(07:13):
page for it.
And the it was interestingbecause I felt such pressure at
that moment.
My youngest was three, and Ifelt like this was the way that
she was gonna know her grandpa.
And so it was like really,really important that his story
mattered, and it was reallyimportant that I write it down.

(07:36):
So this is where Walter comesin.
Now, who is Walter?
Walter is a fictitious umcharacter, someone that I
completely made up.
He was really easy to writeabout because there was like no
attachment to him, right?
And so it was very easy towrite about him.
And so that is where I started.

(07:58):
And it was interesting justbeing able to write.
Um, it I mean, there was aturned out to be kind of a heavy
story, but it helped me processmy feelings in such a way that
I could return to write about mydad.
And um that was the moreimportant story.

(08:22):
Uh, and I actually, so I didfinish his work and I did it in
a way that like um I am one ofsix.
There are six of us.
So I included all of us spokeat his funeral, and I included
all of my siblings' um funeraltalks.
So you could get um the mostimportant thing to my father

(08:44):
were his relationships, and Ithink that it was a way that you
could see more about therelationships that really
mattered to him.
So um I I finished this.
This is my dad's story, and itjust really solidified more for
me that stories matter.
I also finished Walter's story,which is this one.

(09:08):
And again, um I think storiesmatter.
And I thought like writingthese that would kind of help
silence my self-doubt that Ihave been experiencing and these
feelings of imposter syndrome.
Um, but it did not.
And I think what helped alittle bit through that was um

(09:32):
figuring out the purpose ofthese books.
Like, what was their purpose?
Um, a lot of times as anauthor, I I kind of sometimes
daydream.
Scott, I know you're an author,Alisha, I know you're an author
as well.
Um, it's just something thathas that you guys experience as
well, like the daydreams thatkind of happen in the
background.

(09:53):
Right.
And and so you kind of thinklike, wouldn't it be awesome to
land on a self, like on a on aum best selling list?
And these books were neverintended for that.
Um, and I think I had to kindof go through a little bit of a
process about understanding whatsuccess meant and what um their

(10:15):
purpose was.
There's a line in thescriptures um and in the temple
that every living thing shallfulfill the measure of its
creation.
My question is, do you thinkthat that could also be applied
to the works of our hands?
And my answer to that questionis yes, I do.

(10:37):
I think that we can figure outwhat the measure like to have
our things fill the measure oftheir creations.
And I think that each of thosebooks filled the measure of
their creations.
It was never about how manywere going to be sold.
Um, my dad's book was aboutpreserving his voice and his
legacy.
Um and I would also add thatwriting a book certainly isn't

(11:03):
the only way to do it, butthat's what resonated in how I
wanted to do it.
I think each of my siblings hastried to preserve his legacy
and his voice in different waysas well.
Um, and I think that Walter'sstory was more about coming
through a difficult time andabout moving through grief and
mourning.

(11:24):
So I really liked um, I'velistened to a couple of your
podcast episodes.
I really liked, I can'tremember her name, but the
Australian woman that came onjust recently.
And um, I I like the quote thatshe said, I'm not gonna get it
exactly right, but she said thatlike the gospel isn't a magic
wand that just like suddenlytakes away all of the things.

(11:44):
And um, I think you know, weneed to find different ways that
that we are able to navigatethrough the trials of our life.
Um so soon after my father'spassing, I was camping with my
extended family, and we have asheep ranch that's been in our
family for generations, andthat's where we were camping.

(12:07):
We were all around the campfireand we were talking about kind
of next steps.
Um, I knew that I had wanted tobe an author and had been
working on different things, andwe were just kind of
brainstorming.
My um brother-in-law told meabout this study, and I thought
it was really interesting.

(12:27):
It is the idea of um quantityversus quality.
Do you guys know the study I'mtalking about?
Um, so it was kind ofinteresting because it has
morphed a little bit, but theoriginal experiment, it was um
about photography, it wasconducted at the University of
Florida, and he split the groupsinto two, and the quantity was
just going to be graded solelyon the number of photos that

(12:50):
they produced, whereas thequality had to produce one
perfect photo.
And the result was thatsurprisingly, the quantity group
produced like their what theywere able to produce was way
better than the quality becausethey learned from their
mistakes, they kept moving, theykept growing, they kept getting

(13:12):
better.
Whereas the quality people weremore like theorizing about what
would make a perfectcomposition.
And so later, that kind of samething has um been retold in
pottery.
Um, it was from the book uh TheArt and Fear, but they changed
the study into pottery, um, withthe versions kind of being the

(13:36):
same.
So, anyway, I um decided towrite five versions of a book,
and it was about sheep.
It was, I think I was kind ofjust inspired by the setting.
And so I wrote five differentversions.
I wrote a sheep telling youabout personal hygiene, a sheep

(13:58):
teaching about vanity andovercoming vanity, a sheep um
telling you about ADHD and umand um overcoming fear, and
finally a sheep that uh foundthe Good Shepherd.
The idea of using a sheep toteach kids to come to the Good
Shepherd just hit on a totallydifferent vibration than the

(14:19):
others.
And so I worked on it andworked on it and worked on it.
I think this is something thatboth of you can relate to.
It's been six years and in themaking, and it has finally come
to fruition.
I'm very excited about it.
Um the in the meantime, duringthose six years, I had
published, I had um pitched theidea to four different

(14:43):
publishers.
And each of them really lovedthe idea, they're enthusiastic
about it, they ask for a fullmanuscript.
If any, if there's an authorthat has gone through that, that
is a very exciting prospect ofhaving a publisher like ask for
your full manuscript.
That's just very exciting.
Um, all of them passed.
Uh, they they did not approveof it, and they said good luck,

(15:08):
and no, thank you.
Um, but this story was likewritten on my heart, and it was
something that I couldn't letgo.
Um, there was one particularrejection that stung pretty
harshly.
Um, and to tell you a littleabout it.
So the story is it's called TheSheep Chronicles.
Um, it's a children's picturebook, but it's written in the

(15:32):
style of comics.
And um this person had told meum to a little bit more about
it.
Um so Joshua is about to getbaptized and he's feeling a
little bit nervous.
I think the thing that's alittle bit tricky with like
going through the temple for thefirst time or with getting

(15:53):
baptized, you can't, there isn'ta way to like you can learn,
you can study, and you could goto classes, you can do all of
these things, but experiencingit yourself is just different.
And you can't go through ituntil you're there doing it for
the first time.

(16:13):
There just isn't a way toexperience it other than going
through it.
And so I I wrote this story asa way to kind of like ease
people's anxiety about baptism.
And the feedback I got fromthis particular publisher was um
the comics, the rules of comicsare that superhero vibes.

(16:34):
They the kids are here for thesuperheroes, and so I was
sitting with that, and so thatwas basically a full rewrite.
And um, I I went to my mom'shouse and I mentioned um we we
had um this sheep ranch in ourfamily, and so a lot of um, I

(17:01):
guess sheep paraphernalia havebeen given to my parents um over
the years.
So, but to go back a littlebit, so imposter syndrome for
me, imposterism and those kindof thoughts, for me, what that
sounds like to myself is um whoam I to write this?
Like, who am I that peoplewould listen?

(17:23):
And like because I don't have aPhD, um, and I don't have like
a super high calling in thechurch or anything, and I don't
have a million followers onYouTube or Instagram, and I was
on TikTok, but I'm not anymore.
Um, and so kind of like, whatam I doing?
And who am I pretending to be?
And I, you know, had thesethings, and and especially where

(17:47):
um this this feedback was,well, these are the rules, and
you're not finding it fillingthe rules, and so you don't
really know what you're doing.
Um, I had all those in my in mymind, and I was uh as I was
going through my um parents'house, there was this wall.
Um, they had gone to put all ofthe sheep in a collection

(18:08):
together, and you know, I wasjust sitting there looking at
it, and it was like, this is astory I was born to tell.
And um it was interestingbecause I think the there was a
moment.
Um, my my daughter was that hasrecently my youngest is now

(18:33):
eight.
She was baptized um lastJanuary, and I was reading
through some drafts with her,and we we had such a beautiful
moment where there was um Joshuagoes and and he brings his
questions.
Um, there was a conference talkum that President Nelson uh

(18:56):
had.
I cannot remember the exacttime or the exact quote, but it
was something along the linesof, I wish all of you were my
grandkids.
And so Joshua goes to hisgrandpa, and his grandpa kind of
has that President Nelson-esquevibe of a very loving, tender,

(19:17):
knowledgeable man.
And Joshua brings hisquestions, and his his grandpa
is patient and kind andunderstanding and breaks down um
baptism using um a parable ofsheep to tell the story about
why and how we're baptized.
Um and he also encouragesJoshua to remember, um, to

(19:42):
remember the feelings that hehad had.
Now, my daughter had was herfeelings were very upset, and
she came down excited.
She came into my office and waslike, Mom, I remembered.
Um she said that she went intoher closet and there was some, I

(20:05):
can't even remember thesituation.
Oh, she was probably fightingwith her siblings.
Anyway, um, that she was upsetabout and she remembered the
feelings that she had from herbaptism, and it helped her come
to a place of peace and comfort.
And I thought, okay, that'smaybe this has filled the

(20:26):
measure of its creation andwe're done.
Um, but then I got thinkingabout the other families that
have eight-year-olds that mightalso want to have that type of
scenario play out in theirhomes.
And so I hope that I find one.
Um but I would say that ourstories matter.

(20:51):
Um, this like my dad's storyreally mattered.
And not just the ones that weshare with other people, but the
ones that we tell in our minds,the ones that we are saying to
ourselves.
And I think that um there's aquote that I really like.
Um, it was actually when I Iwent to the illustrator and I

(21:15):
talked to him about the um whatthe publisher had said, and he
said, well, okay, just becauseyou heard something doesn't make
it true.
And he he had asked that we gotalk to kids and see what they
feel about this book.
And it, I think that there arechildren that do resonate with

(21:38):
that superhero.
They have that inner strengthand they're just ready to take
on the world, and that isawesome.
Um and I I do think that thereare still things, hopefully,
that they can learn from thebook, but I think that that
could possibly be more of anexception um than the rule for
kids.
I think um it is a little bitmore difficult to do something,

(21:59):
like I had mentioned before.
It's difficult um when you'reasked kids to do something.
And I feel like we ask them todo new things all the time,
whether it's like going into aclass for the first time or
trying a different um likeswimming lessons or or soccer,
whatever.
We we're asking them andencouraging them, or their new

(22:20):
primary class, like every uhJanuary, they're they're finding
and meeting new teachers andand and we are asking them to
broaden their horizons quite abit.
Um anyway, I started this, Ialso had um this podcast, and I
think that um I like you, feellike these are stories matter.

(22:43):
And these ideas of faith anddetermination and what kind of
gets people through theirdifficult times are really
important.
And I also do life coachingbecause I think that those
stories that we tell ourselvesneed to be examined.
Um, because just because youthink something or that you have

(23:05):
heard something doesn't make ittrue.
Um, I'm teaching a class thisyear at LDS PMA, and the class
is I am who God says that I am,uh, faith's answer to imposter
syndrome, self-doubt, andrejection fatigue.
Um, so with rejection fatigue,I sort of dabble a little bit in

(23:29):
different things, and I foundmyself um talking to a group of
salespeople and you know, askingthem if they had experienced
rejection fatigue.
And as you can imagine, that issomething that is very well
experienced through sales.
And um also I was thinkingabout our missionaries that we
are asking our missionaries allthe time to knock on doors and

(23:52):
to ask people and to share thepe to share the gospel and the
good news with people that don'tnecessarily want to hear it.
There are some that do, and Imean that's like the payday,
right?
But you have to go through alot to find the one.
Um and I think that groundingyourself in the knowledge that

(24:17):
you are who God says that youare is uh face answer to
self-doubt and to impostersyndrome and to rejection
fatigue.
And um, that's all I got.

Wow, okay.
So so why did you write fiveversions or five different
stories?
What was the what was theimpetus for the five?

So that was um that was inspired by my
brother-in-law's that whole ideaof the quantity versus quality,
right?
I wanted to write like I Iwanted to write a really good
quality book, but I thought Iwas gonna get there by writing a
quantity.
And it was actually reallyinteresting because as I was

(25:06):
preparing for this, I went backand looked at those originals
and it has improvedsignificantly.

So, what did you end?
What was the end result?
Did you put them all fivestories together or did you come
up with one grand story?

Or so this is the one grand story.
It is called Sheep ChroniclesBaptism.
Um, so it just came out inSeptember.
It actually is also availablein Spanish.
Um I think I so I did thatbecause and I I um, you know,
just listened to generalconference, and one of the

(25:43):
things that struck me about thisgeneral conference, possibly
more than others, is thedifferent accents.
And I loved it.
I thought it was so wonderfulthat, you know, we are worldwide
um religion, and I think we areseeing that more and more.
And this was like my small nodof yes, we are a worldwide
religion.
I want to add voices to thetable.

(26:06):
Um, so I um it's called SheepChronicles.
The first one is baptism.
Um, I did it is it is difficultto talk about baptism without
talking about the Holy Ghost.
Um, but I think that that needsa whole book in itself.
And um it was interesting, Igot into some interesting

(26:28):
conversations about this becauseI also think it's difficult to
separate um baptism fromrepentance um because those are
so entwined.
However, as an eight-year-old,um like children are spotless
before God.
And so it didn't feel totallyright to write a story about

(26:51):
baptism as a call to repentancefor children.
Um and so, so the the idea isthe sheep chronicles is going to
be made up of baptism.
Um, Joshua is gonna come to hisfather to his grandfather for
in another book, in the secondbook, and learn more about the
Holy Ghost.

(27:12):
And in the third book, he'sgonna learn more about partaking
of the sacrament.
And that felt more of therepentance piece and how those
all together work together.

Nice.
So I want to go back to whenyou uh the the scripture that
you were sharing about howeverything um will fulfill its
measure of creation, right?
Like can you can you repeatthat again for us?

Yes.
Um, so I actually um I know itis scriptorial.
I um it struck me is kind ofinteresting.
I was just having aconversation yesterday about how
the temple is the Lord'suniversity.
And um, you know, it doesn'tchange when you go, like the
things are the same.

(27:59):
However, we change, right?
Because the experiences that wehave, the things that we're
thinking about as we're bringingto the temple change.
And so there was a line in thein the temple that says that
like that you shall fulfill themeasure of its creation.
And it was there that I waslike, okay, I need to be very

(28:22):
clear about what I am definingas success or defining as a
measure of one's like not justmy books, but of mine.
Because going back to like,where aren't my people, I think
it was interesting because um,you know, I I I had mentioned

(28:44):
the move and how big it was of atransition.
Um, you know, my my husband wasable to kind of like find his
people almost immediately withhis new job.
And my kids, as they startedschool, as they got um involved
with sports, were able to findtheir people.
And and that question um is isinteresting because um I've also

(29:09):
had a good conversation aboutum like in church being heard
and seen, but also what thatlooks like, be like using
service as a way to get to knowpeople and also realizing that
especially after COVID, I thinka lot of people really want to

(29:32):
be connected, and so I did tryand find different ways to
connect groups of people, and umI also found pickleball.
Do you guys play pickleball?

Yes.

I that is another way to find people because uh
pickleball community and um agroup of friends that I have
specifically are likephenomenal.
That's awesome.

Well, I just so just to kind of go back a little
bit to the the fulfilling yourmeasure of creation.
I I really loved what you saidthere because I think that
especially as as creativepeople, rather whether you're um
someone who's producing music,you're writing books, you're uh
an entrepreneur and you'rebuilding a business, you know,

(30:18):
like like people in that spaceof creation, uh, they tend to,
and I know I'm super guilty ofthis, think so big, right?
That we kind of forget thatsometimes that might not be the
Lord's plan, right?
Like maybe bits and pieces ofit are, or maybe he wants you to

(30:39):
get medium, or maybe he justwants you to stay small for a
little while because he's gotsomething else, you know, that
he's gonna take you to.
And so I think that um I I justI one I appreciated you
bringing that up because I knowfor me uh I'm going on oh it'll
be almost seven years.
So six and a half years rightnow since I started my book.

(31:01):
And it's just been sittingdormant for about a year now
where I only have a couplechapters I have to finish.
That's it.
And I just I'm so it's beyondwriter's block.
It's like there is nothinggoing on in my head and
everything that I had planneddoes not feel right anymore.
And so it feels like I'mwaiting for the Lord to give me

(31:24):
direction on how to end thisbecause my original plan is not
how he wants me to end it.
And what I'm thinking of rightnow doesn't also feel like maybe
the right way to do it.
And so now I'm like what are wedoing here?
And and with you saying thatI'm like is that one of those
things where maybe I was onlysupposed to go to that point for

(31:47):
I mean hopefully not foreverbut like was it because it
needed to get me through the thefirst five years after losing
my brother did it need to youknow like did it have a
different purpose did it have adifferent reason for the
creation of it that maybe I havealready fulfilled what needed
to be fulfilled so now anythingextra is just extra right and

(32:09):
and maybe is that why my brainis blank or my motivation is
gone or you know whatever it is.
I don't know I hope not becauseI really want to have a
finished book so badly.
Um but I I think it'sinteresting because I just had
this conversation with my sontoday my uh my almost 19 year
old he is just putting so muchpressure on himself to figure

(32:32):
out like what exactly he needsto do with his life and I'm like
dude you're not even 19 likechill you're you're going to
you're just do something likejust do something you know like
he he has been wanting to go ona mission but then he was kind
of like I don't know and andthen he talks about going in the
military and then he talksabout um going to college and

(32:55):
he's just kind of all over theplace and he just feels like he
is stuck in indecision.
And I kind of kept having totell him today especially I was
like dude like just do somethingjust do something like you
don't have to assume that whatyou're doing needs to be done
perfectly or for the next 40years of your life or whatever.

(33:17):
You know it's just sometimesit'll be the thing that leads to
the next thing you know and Ithink that's kind of what you
were talking about with withquantity over quality too right
like that whole like sometimesit's just exercise.
Sometimes it's just to open onelittle door sometimes it's it's
just to help you to overcomeyour imposter syndrome or to

(33:39):
help you meet someone who'sgoing to give you an idea or
give you direction or be asounding board for you right um
so that to me is reallyinteresting.
I have I do have a questionabout you know you you brought
up imposter syndrome a lot doyou feel like in doing these
books and in in the last fewyears that you've been writing

(34:00):
do you feel like that islessening for you like that that
feeling of imposter syndrome oris that something that you're
still struggling with and howare you helping other people to
overcome what they'reexperiencing?

Um I have so many thoughts and I I I love um the
question and I love yourthoughts as well.
And I would say um one thing Iwanted to add to what I was
saying before um I because likeokay it was that moment in the
temple that that hit me with theum feeling the measure of its
creation and I was like okaylet's learn a little bit more

(34:38):
about that and I just there is atalk I it was uh BYU speeches
by um Sister Holland um thatgoes into depth about that too.
And so um if that's somethingyou're interested in I would um
recommend doing that.
Um and I think um asentrepreneurs Alisha and both
Alisha and Scott you guys can dothis like relate to this as

(35:02):
well.
My dad was an entrepreneur umand I interview a lot of
entrepreneurs as well and Ithink that there's just this
thing like becoming anentrepreneur you have to be okay
with a little bit of risk andyou have to be okay with like
not knowing because you're nevergoing to know all the things
that you need to know.
And that's how we kind of likegrow and you just have to know

(35:25):
like a little bit to get to thenext step.
And um I I think that that is alittle bit of um a part of
imposter syndrome.
So so to answer that questionAlisha I it is something that I
it is a voice in my head thatI'm very familiar with.

(35:47):
It is something that is prettyconstant and and I think um you
know I don't know if it is forother people as well I feel like
every guest I well there's beenum I think maybe one exception
um that had did not know what Iwas talking about when I said
the imposter syndrome.
It is very common phenomenon Ithink especially as um as

(36:12):
creatives I think we get alittle bit of dose of imposter
syndrome.
I also think like possibly aslatter day saints because we are
such a purpose driven peoplethat I think that that might
come with um you know I I wasjust talking again about um the
temple with a friend and she hadsaid I think you know once I

(36:36):
get everything's like figuredout then I'm gonna go and that
that's like one of those thingsthat like if we waited for
perfection like none of us wouldever go to church none of us
would ever partake of thesacrament none of us would ever
go to the temple.
And there's a I again reallylike imposter syndrome.

(37:00):
I feel like I've done a lot ofresearch of it there's um I
think it's like five differentkinds of ways that imposter
syndrome manifests and one ofthem is like perfectionism and
that like once things aretotally perfect then I'm gonna
move forward.
And that time will never comebecause that there like you'll

(37:20):
you'll never be able to totallyfigure out because none of us
can tell the future or likewhat's going to happen.

And and so anyway I don't that those are a
couple of my thoughts did thatanswer your question yeah yeah I
think so so I'm I've got somethoughts this is actually a
really interesting topic so um Ilove the idea of billing the
measure of your creation I meanwe're all three of us are

(37:49):
creators on the podcast hereright um and I'm thinking about
my career in business just as anexample as you've been talking
so I've built over 40 differentsoftware products over my
career.
Wow and I've only had threethat have been successful right

(38:10):
so um and one of them was reallysuccessful then one was kind of
successful and one was okay therest of them nothing happened
but if I wouldn't have built the37 other products I wouldn't
have hit had those threesuccessful products right and I

(38:34):
you have to take the risk likeyou were saying Cassidy you have
to be willing to to get out ofyour comfort zone I love the
idea of quantity over qualitybecause that does give you those
opportunities to fail forwardas long as you keep going you
can learn from the things thatyou've done and you can do

(38:54):
better on the next one andbetter on the next one and you
don't know which one is going tobe the big thing that has the
the big impact right so there'sthat side of it.
But then I was also thinking umfrom a personal perspective the
measure of our creation we canimpact other people but us

(39:17):
creating actually helps us rightright and if the worth of a
soul is great in the sight ofGod and our soul is incredibly
valuable and if and as we createwe actually get especially with
like church related thingsright we become closer to God

(39:39):
whether anybody reads our bookor listens to our music or
whatever it is that we create onthe church side we s we get
converted and and become closerto him like I it took me nine
years to finish my book andthere was a lot I mean you guys

(39:59):
know like it's gruelingsometimes right you'll sit at
the computer and you'll writesomething for hours and then
you'll be like that's not right.
Yeah you read it the next dayand you're like what was I
thinking yeah but it's theprocess it's the process and and

(40:22):
to your um sorry I'm I got onemore thought um to your idea of
imposter syndrome so I've built40 different software products
I've started well over a dozendifferent companies and I'm
building a new one right now wetalked about this before the
show a little bit but I stillhave that that imposter syndrome

(40:46):
like I don't what if peoplearen't don't like it what if it
fails right am I crazy why am Idoing this again right I still
have it and I've built lots ofdifferent companies but it's
that's there's always that thingthat that just gets at you and
you just gotta push it down andjust keep going I don't I don't

(41:07):
know if you can ever get over itcompletely but I'm able to cope
with it now a lot better than Idid when I was younger.
And maybe that's just the bestwe can do is just it gets
smaller over time as we keeptaking those risks and push
forward.

I don't know what are your thoughts on that um
okay so so Scott I I love itthank you for both like both of
your um ideas so starting withthe creation one um yes
absolutely I think um it is kindof interesting because we

(41:44):
believe that God created um withhis son jesus christ created
the world right created all ofus and so I believe that
creation is a part of our DNAyeah literally right like um
because we're also called um tomultiply and replenish the air

(42:08):
there we go thank you yes yesyes that's what exactly not just
with babies yes yes yes but notjust with babies but also to to
create and to um take care ofthe world around us and to look
out for each other and also tocreate and um I think that that

(42:28):
is definitely true.
And I think um along thoselines I was thinking um I I
think there's a beautiful ideathat you we're trying to reach
the one and I think that thatcame from Christ that was just
wanted the one and through thisI have thought but what if I'm

(42:50):
the one what if all of this isjust to make me a slightly
better person.
Okay.
Um hopefully I am helpingothers along the way hopefully
my um life is one of service butalso I feel like certainly I am
being impacted.

(43:10):
Okay.
So to talk about impostersyndrome um I really like it.
If that's something that anylisteners are interested in
these are two books that I wouldreally recommend.
So this is The Secret Thoughtsof successful women and men why
capable people suffer fromimposter syndrome and how to
thrive in spite of it.

(43:31):
And um Jill Stoddard who has aPhD wrote Imposter syndrome no
more overcome self-doubt andimposter syndrome sorry
imposterism to cultivate asuccessful career.
I actually had the opportunityof interviewing Jill Stoddard is
very cool.
Cool it was really cool.
So anyway um one of the thingsthat she says that I really like

(43:54):
and this is to um your pointScott that you have done all
these incredible things likeyou've made a lot of stuff where
you know what you're doing andand also that there's that voice
that's like but do you reallyum I have a whole theory about
this um we'll we if we can getto it if we have time but one of

(44:16):
what she says is that that canserve as a neon sign to you to
show you what's important.
And when those like imposterwhen those imposter thoughts
come up that is yourself tellinglike your your um kind of
protective self saying this isreally important and I get this

(44:36):
right.

And I think Scott like if you've developed
this many software programs itseems like software is pretty
important to yeah yeah wellhelping people I mean I build
software to help people right tobe more successful so yeah and
I I feel like another cool thingI call it the singularity this

(44:58):
is kind of something weird butover time Cassidy this is the
craziest thing when as I've beenmoving in my career and
building things um it feels likewell we could probably say God
on this podcast but a lot oftimes in business you say the
universe right it's felt likethings have been put in in front

(45:20):
of me more and more as I gofurther down the path.
And it's in fact it's happenedso much in the last few years
that it feels like it's comingto a point.
And so I've actually called itthe singularity and I call that
in my office because it'shappened so frequently that
things just serendipitously comeout of the woodwork to make

(45:44):
what we're building possible.
And when I look back I'm likehow did all those things happen
just coincidentally I I don'tunderstand how it could happen
without me taking the steps infaith even through the fear but
then just pushing forward andthen God just kind of puts

(46:06):
things in your path to make ithappen.
That's a that's somethingthat's really cool that I've
that's happened so often that Iactually make created a name for
it.

Yes I love that so so if I can add to that um yes
I totally agree um so I it wasreally cool I just um recently
went to two weeks um with myhusband to Italy I it's been
like a lifelong dream and itjust happened and it was
amazing.

(46:37):
I got to see the Sistine Chapelum it was really cool.
I actually got to um be in acrowd when um the Pope came the
new pope came um out is it wasso cool.
But um the the thing that Iwanted to share with you was um
seeing Michelangelo's David andthe way that they had it um kind

(47:00):
of like the showcase of it isthey had several um statues that
are unfinished like theunfinished prisoners and so you
just see this like slab of stoneand there is a slab of stone
marble it's beautiful you knowbut but it's just and you can

(47:21):
see as he is finishing you cansee like um there's one that he
was like working on the lake andyou can see the little chisel
marks and to go kind of like tothe slow progressions of these
different um not characters butdifferent features different
people that have come out andand um Michelangelo is quoted as

(47:44):
saying that it is God thatshows him like what is like what
needs to be taken away and andwhat is in there.
And it is so incredible to seethe transition of how it just
went from this lab to amasterpiece to refined beautiful

(48:09):
delicate like you can see theveins in his hands you can see
like his strength you can seehis determination and it just is
truly a masterpiece and I feellike that's also what you're
saying Scott that like that Godis working through you to also
uncover these things so that youcan create your measure of of

(48:34):
the thing that you're working onto fill that measure of its
creation.

Well that kind of gives me another thought as
we create we create our turnourselves into a masterpiece
yeah but how do you not beafraid of imposter syndrome how
do you take it and use it forgood because we know that
everything can be used for goodso how do we do that?

Yes so I um I feel like I hear you saying Alisha
that like we're categorizingimposter syndrome as a negative
but what if it is there to helpus yeah yeah um so again one of
the things I really like um thisbook um in the interview that I
had with Jill she talked abouthow she named her that imposter

(49:26):
voice that she heard um shenamed it Sheila and you know she
would kind of like talk back toSheila and she would say you
are trying to protect me becauseI don't think like any of us
want to feel stupid right likewe don't want to feel like a
failure or we don't want to likeif this is something that's

(49:46):
really important to us, we wantto show like we want to
represent ourselves in the bestway that we can so I do want to
clarify one thing here because Idid have someone say um you
know I don't experience impostersyndrome because I don't ever
try and pretend to be someonethat I'm not and that is not

(50:12):
imposter syndrome.
I feel like imposter syndromeis just that tiny voice in your
head that says like you know whowho do you kind of think that
you are um other other thingsthat it could possibly say uh
have you guys seen K-pop demonhunters?
I've not I've heard so much uhAlisha I'm too busy to watch TV

(50:37):
I'm so sorry okay no worries butbut but from that show um you
know those the the kind of ideasI actually think it does talk
about imposter syndrome withouttalking about imposter syndrome
but um the main characters umdeal with these ideas of I'm too
much I'm not enough and what ifpeople like uh knew the real me

(51:01):
then they wouldn't uh accept meand I think those are more kind
of the voices that impostersyndrome might make and so yes I
do think um like it can help usprepare ourselves in a in a way
that we can become our mostauthentic self um or that we can

(51:29):
like write a book five times oror wait six years until it's
like we have it at a point thatwe're like really comfortable
with you know what I mean yeahyeah exactly yeah well and this

(51:50):
the these kind of conversationsare good for even for us to
listen to together right becausewe we need that reassurance
that when we do feel that we'renot enough that it's okay to
keep pushing because that's howwe get to the next level that's
how we become strong we we haveto go through the trials to

(52:13):
become stronger.

Yeah and and imposter syndrome is a trial
that I think we have to overcomealong the way it's just one of
those things it's just like fearor self-doubt you know like
you've you've got to overcomethose things in order to become
stronger over time.
Doesn't always doesn'tnecessarily mean it's gonna go

(52:35):
away like I said I still haveit.
And there's days even now whereI'm like what the heck am I
doing?
Am I crazy?
Like you know and I've donethis for my whole career so it's
I still get it.
That's been 25 years.

Yeah.

Okay.
Um I wasn't gonna go here but Iwant to now um so so you know I
I had mentioned before that Ihad like a theory and this is
kind of my theory about impostersyndrome.
I don't think it's by accident.
I think it's one of the thegreat deceivers most potent uh
tools that he uses against usand and why I think that is um

(53:18):
you know I feel like inscripture we actually kind of
see it in Moses.
So um you know in Moses one weread that Moses has an
incredible transformativeexperience with God.
He he's able to see him face toface and um and then Moses says

(53:38):
um I'm not gonna get the quoteexactly right um no no satan um
after after this satan comes toMoses and says um Moses son of
man just just that like he he istrying to belittle him and in
the screw tape letters umwormwood you guys are you

(53:59):
familiar with the screw tapeletters so um wormwood is a wise
old devil and he givesinstructions to his nephew
through letters and in oneletter he says as a preliminary
to detaching this man from Godyou need to detach him from
himself I think Satan uses uhimposter syndrome self-doubt

(54:24):
fear these different types ofthings to belittle and downplay
our divine identity makes senseyeah it makes sense I wouldn't
agree with that so we just hadum Calvin Bagley on Bagley right
is that his last name anywayand he gave us like some
suggestions for books that hereally really loved and one of

(54:46):
the books that he talked about Ican't remember which one it is
I'm gonna have to look it up butum he talked about how a lot of
the times we tend to confuselike who we are with um thinking
that we're our body we're ourbrain we're our emotions we're
whatever he's like no like we'reour spirits and so if you

(55:07):
remember that your brain youremotions your trauma your body
all those things are likedifferent things that your
spirit is kind of running rightum and instead we be we let our
spirit just be an observerinstead of like a a judge or
jury or executioner or that kindof stuff and and if we're
having these moments like theimposter syndrome if we're

(55:29):
having these voices come in itwould be a good idea for us to
practice um kind of getting intune with like our spirit and
being like okay I am my spiritso this imposter syndrome is
coming from my brain or it'scoming from my trauma or it's
coming from a circumstance maybethe circumstance is that you're
not yet a a published author oryou're not yet a successful

(55:52):
entrepreneur or you're not yetyou know in this great
relationship or something likethat, right?

So it's coming from a temporary circumstance
and if we can just take a minuteto observe and just be like, oh
that's interesting and justleave it at that like we don't
have to give any emotion to it.
We don't have we don't you knowwhat I mean like maybe that is
a thing that helps us to moveforward a little bit more or to
to take in just be like oh okayyou're bringing up a problem

(56:21):
that I haven't yet solved so howdo I solve that problem that
could also be maybe another Idon't know another tool
absolutely I think that's agreat suggestion I think that's
a great idea I like that a lotAlisha yeah that book he was the
power of no there you go thankyou Scott I know he's he's he
suggested a few of them to us soI couldn't remember which one

(56:43):
was which but wow this has beenan interesting conversation I
didn't realize was gonna go downthis path but it's been
actually really good.

Yeah I've loved it thank you is there any yeah
yeah is there anything else thatyou'd like to share with us as
we kind of wrap things up anylast thoughts that you'd like to
share with the audience yeahabsolutely so if um anyone in
your audience is looking to umlooking for a life coach you can
find me um on Sage firstpublishing um you can have like

(57:16):
a my have a link to my podcastthere and books and if you're
interested in um having thenewsletter I have a monthly
newsletter as well perfect andwe'll be sure to put those links
for you for everyone in thedescription so easy to find you
can look at your books at thatsite too yes um so it is you can

(57:38):
get them from that site it is alink to Amazon gotcha um but
yeah it's all there perfectawesome well um any any last
words of encouragement yeah asyou've done this as you know
have you been able to overcomesome of these things in your
life or get a betterunderstanding of them I think so

(58:00):
I mean I like what you saidScott I feel like it's um it's
something that is kind ofinteresting um one of the things
that Jill said is you know evenas even if you are a published
author and you have all thesuccess it's not going to go
away because now you're gonna beperforming at a different level
and so I like Alisha what youwere saying about being more

(58:25):
comfortable with it and cominglike kind of taking a step back
and asking okay what what am Iwhat's the lesson here?
What can I learn from this andand how can I grow in this
moment?
And I think being able to justkeep going I think um these

(58:46):
these feelings that we havearen't accidental.
And I think the way to combatthem is to recognize them and
also to embrace your divineidentity.
I like Alisha what you weresaying.

I mean it is a very simple it's like a primary
thing but like that you're achild of God and knowing that
and owning that identity I thinkthat that can kind of shift
your strength to rise above yeahyeah exactly wow well this has
been so good I I always lovethese ones where we get to have

(59:20):
more of a discussion and and Ifeel like I walk away like
knowing more.
So thank you so much, Cassidy.

It's been my pleasure thank you so much for
having me join you today.

Yeah yeah of course yeah well thanks for
everyone for tuning in toanother episode of Latterday
lights um if you have a storythat you'd like to share we'd
love to have you on go tolatterdaylights.com or send us
an email at latterdaylights atgmail.com yeah absolutely and
make sure you guys do your fivesecond missionary work click

(59:52):
that share button uh comment onCassidy's uh episode if you're
listening to it and just let herknow what you think about
imposter syndrome what youshould

Alisha Coakley (01:00:00):
Struggle with, um, what you have found helps
you.
I think that would be reallygreat to keep this conversation
going in the comments.
So um make sure you guys dothat and uh be sure to tune in
for another episode of LatteryLights next Sunday.

Scott Brandley (01:00:15):
Till then.
Well take care.
Bye guys.
What are your thoughts on that?

Cassidy Beck (01:00:30):
Oh, I have so many.
Um so I love it.
Um sorry, edit that part out.
Um, okay.

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Rising Above Self-Doubt Through Faith & Creation: Cassidy Beck's Story - Latter-Day Lights

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Rising Above Self-Doubt Through Faith & Creation: Cassidy Beck's Story - Latter-Day Lights