August 14, 2025 • 21 mins
We explore a comprehensive time management framework designed specifically for high achievers who excel at delivering for others but struggle to prioritize themselves. This system helps you honor personal commitments without sacrificing performance, using a three-phase approach that reduces stress and increases focus.
• The Self-First Time Mastery Framework addresses the common problem of deprioritizing personal goals
• Guilt-Free Future Planning helps extract priorities from your mind and organize them based on impact and effort
• Strategically Selfish Scheduling transforms priorities into calendar commitments using the "Firebox" prioritization matrix
• Daily Domination techniques include visualizing work, capturing distractions in the "Squirrel Cage," and setting firm task limits
• Knowing your daily task capacity (suggested: seven per day) dramatically improves your say-do ratio and credibility
• Important but not urgent tasks like sleep, exercise and nutrition often get sacrificed but eventually become emergencies if neglected
• The framework can be applied even with demanding jobs by focusing on the time spaces you control
If you're interested in joining a workshop to implement this framework, there are three upcoming cohorts with a maximum of 15 people per group.
Sign up for the workshop: https://www.depthbuilder.com/do-the-damn-thing
Download a PDF copy of Becoming the Promise You are Intended to Be
https://www.depthbuilder.com/books
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Like many, many of you out there, hard chargers,
make it happeners.
You go out there, you makestuff happen.
You deliver at work, youdeliver at home, you deliver for
the softball team, but when itcomes down to like you
delivering for you and followingthrough on the like, the big,
impactful, meaningful thingsthat that have been on your
plate or that you've hadinterest and curiosity about,
(00:22):
you just don't find the time todo that.
So I was in that situation fora very long time Still looking
good, right, still making stuffhappen.
But you know, my exercisewasn't so great and that thing I
wanted to learn the language Iwanted to learn kind of kept
getting deprioritized for otherpeople's stuff.
Those things were good but Ihadn't figured out like how to
(00:43):
take care of myself and how tohonor myself.
It's over several years.
What I did was tinker aroundwith different things, because
there's like a bazillion timemanagement things, the Pomodoro
thing and you know, timeblocking and all these other
things, which is like conceptualand and I don't disagree with
them, actually they'reintegrated into this whole
(01:05):
framework.
But it took me applying a wholebunch of things progressively
over years, to kind of get clearabout what the hell it is that
I needed to do or I needed towork on, so that I can not just
be effective and deliver foreverybody else, but so that I
could also honor myself and makeprogress on those things.
(01:29):
You know, those hidden thingstaking salsa classes, spending
more time with family, spendingmore time with friends,
journaling, reflecting vacation,like all of those things.
They just they were going tohappen some point and sometime
in the future.
It's a high level, it's futureplanning, which is one thing,
and I'm going to get into someof the details so you guys
understand exactly like how thesystem progressively works, from
(01:52):
future long-term planning downto daily planning.
So if you are out there in theomniverse, drop a note in the
comments, let me know whereyou're calling in from.
So again, just a rebrand, arename, same thing, same energy,
same intent, same purpose, butwe're calling it the self-first
time mastery framework.
(02:12):
The key words there isself-first.
The 100% focus is on you as theindividual, and I got a little
framework to like help us makethat happen, because most of us
make it happeners are very, verygood at serving others.
We're very, very good at makingthings happen for other people
(02:32):
in our life and that'sabsolutely critically important,
but we're not as good as takingcare of ourselves, and so this
system not only is going to helpyou, like, amp up your
performance, your effectivenessand bring your stress down, but
it's also going to make you takecare of yourself, and it'll
help you do that.
So let's get into it Self-firsttime.
(02:53):
Mastery framework Can you tellI'm practicing Like I still
haven't mastered the muscles inmy mouth to say that well, and
so the first thing that we getinto is guilt-free future
planning, and we do this in thissequence.
We start with future planning,and by future planning you get
to define that.
(03:14):
Are you talking about a week, amonth, a quarter, a year,
depending on where your brain issome of us?
I'm just worried about the nextfour hours, bro.
Good, let's talk about thatfuture.
It could be a week, it could bemonths, it could be years.
I think I use it for likemonthly and quarterly.
And so when we're doing theguilt-free future planning, the
number one thing is you get tobe selfish and only think about
(03:35):
you, and I am like releasingeverybody of all guilt and all
fear.
I will carry that for youduring the workshop.
After the workshop, you can goand start worrying about
everybody else.
But at least I want you to getone rep in or I'm going to make
you get one rep in on thinkingabout you and putting yourself
(03:56):
first, prioritizing the thingsthat are important to you.
And so the first thing we do iswe just dump all the ideas
right, the things that we've hadin our plate, in the back of
our mind, that we want to getdone with relation related to,
like, your business or your job,right, your career, business,
job.
Now the other bucket ispersonal growth and then the
(04:18):
other bucket is meaningfulconnection.
So what we're looking for isall those things that you've
wanted to do, that you intendedto do that you've wanted to do
that you intended to do that youjust haven't done.
Now, critical point is thethings that you want to do, not
the things that you think youshould do or somebody else wants
you to do.
It's only the things that youreally, really want to do.
That man, I want to get thatthing done.
(04:38):
We get those out of our head.
After we get those out of ourhead, this is a whole group
experience, so everybody's kindof sharing and asking and it's a
lot of fun Then we go intoprioritizing and we use the DAMN
matrix D-A-M-N matrix to setpriority of all of those things
(04:58):
that are in our head to startbuilding momentum, right.
And so that is what we are doingright here in this space, in
the damn matrix, and then we say, okay, based on impact and
effort high impact, low effortlet's do that one first.
Let's just get it started,let's just get the ball rolling,
(05:18):
because that's how we getmomentum.
And then we get that littleball rolling, spin that plate,
and we say, okay, which one arewe going to do second?
All right, here's number twoHigh impact, low effort, let's
get that plate spinning, andthat's the whole point.
So we get it out of our head,we prioritize it and then we do,
we walk the plank which one'sgoing first, which one's going
(05:39):
second, which one's going third?
That's guilt-free futureplanning.
Jennifer says what helped me themost was getting all my stuff
out of my head and in astructured space.
Oh, I love it, jen, and that'sthe hard part, right, like
that's.
The thing is we don't reallyeven understand how much static
(05:59):
is in our head, like all thecommitments that we make and
intentions and ideas, like it'sall in there and and it gets
staticky and they start bangingup against each other and then
our stress goes up, and so thisis that's why we use the mural
board, so we get it out.
It's super visual and they'reall the same size and all of a
sudden they're not as big asthey used to be and we can move
them around, and then we couldsay, okay, that's not as
(06:20):
important.
Oh, these are really important.
I want to do these first.
That's it.
Just get it out of your head,give it some order.
That is how we do the guilt-freefuture planning.
Again, the main focus isplanning the stuff that is
important to you, not the stuffthat you think you should do,
that people want you to do.
That you're kind of like oh man, I got to do this.
(06:51):
No, no, no, no.
The things that you want to do,you just haven't done because
you've been putting other peopleahead of yourself.
So now we're going to go to thenext evolution.
So once we get past, once we dothe guilt-free future planning,
then we get into like, oh, nowit's time for action, right, and
we were thinking we werebrainstorming.
Action right, and we werethinking we were brainstorming.
Now we get into thestrategically selfish scheduling
which, again, if you can't tell, I'm using boxes and frameworks
(07:12):
and the mural board.
If you, when you sign up forthe workshop, you'll have that
link to go in there and accessthe mural and continue working
on it or copy it or do whateveryou want.
But it's just a nice venue orformat for it's very
user-friendly First time usersget the hang of it, get in here
and play.
Anyways, the strategicallyselfish scheduling.
So we talked about theguilt-free future planning.
(07:33):
Right, we get all this stuff outof our head, we prioritize it,
we walk the plank and then thenext step is to plug it into our
calendar.
Go find empty space in yourcalendar next week, two weeks
out, three weeks out, whateverit is.
But everybody finds out.
It's like, oh my God, mycalendar is full of junk, or I
don't have anything in mycalendar, but I know I have
commitments.
Exactly, it's all in our head.
(07:55):
We got to get it out of ourhead.
And so when we struggle werealize like man, our calendar,
we need to do some work on ourcalendar.
That's part of my problem ofnot being able to stay on top of
things, always rushing around,always double booked, never
having enough time right.
All of these things, I live it,we've all lived it.
Some cleaning, we're going torun the things to the firebox
(08:26):
right, and that's my justifiedversion of the Eisenhower matrix
, which I know.
A lot of people know theEisenhower matrix and I've been
thinking through it.
Using it as like a mental modelfor me has been extremely
helpful.
The problem for me is it saysright, if it's not important,
not urgent, stop doing it.
Like, yeah, I get that right,like intellectually, I
understand that, but it's notimportant, not urgent.
Stop doing it Like, yeah, I getthat Right, like intellectually
, I understand that.
But it's like, how the hell doyou stop doing it Right?
(08:47):
Some people like me need alittle extra help to like, ok,
but how do I stop, how do Idelegate, how do I do those
things?
And so that's why I made it,muddied it up with the firebox
Things that are urgent andimportant.
You're going to finish thosefirst Things that are important
(09:08):
and not urgent.
You're going to focus, investmore, focus time there, right,
which is not.
Again, it's a deviation.
But the things that areimportant and not urgent are the
things that we alwaysdeprioritize.
And here's the thing aboutthose things is those things
that we deprioritize will becomeurgent.
And I'm gonna give you a simpleexample Sleep, exercise,
nutrition.
How many times answer thisquestion to yourself or drop it
(09:30):
in the comments?
How many times have youdeprioritized sleep to get a
task done, to follow through anddo something or do a favor for
somebody else?
Right, it's not a big dealright now, but the more you
deprioritize sleep, yourperformance drops.
So it's not urgent, it'simportant, but if you keep
ignoring it, it turns into aproblem.
(09:51):
Same thing with exercise, samething with nutrition.
If you can't tell I'm down fromthree chins.
Now I only have two becauseI've historically deprioritized
my physical wellness it willbecome a problem, and when it's
a problem, it's a damn emergency, anyways.
So we take the things in ourcalendar.
We go like for real, for real,go to your calendar, get all of
(10:14):
the stuff out of next week, allthe things that you have in your
calendar and the things thatyou know you have to do that
aren't in your calendar.
And that always stirs abeautiful round of like, what do
you mean?
Like that's personal, it's likeyeah, my recommendation is
combine both of them.
So, anyways, we drop them inthat white section there there's
(10:35):
some instructions, and then weput them in the firebox Again.
Then we put them in the fireboxAgain, being ruthlessly selfish
.
Is it urgent and important tome?
Not to my boss, not to mygirlfriend, not to my wife, not
to anybody else, just to me.
And then, from that perspective, now we understand where they
(10:57):
sit so we can start doing somestrategery around how do we
minimize, how do we outsource,how do we delegate, and so forth
.
This one's a lot, a lot of fun,because now we're talking like
brass, brass, tacks, oh, mygoodness.
So that's phase two, right.
Phase one is guilt-free futureplanning.
Phase two is strategicallyselfish scheduling, and we're
(11:21):
going to get into dailydomination.
Next, I want to help youprioritize, you, be a better
friend to you, and guess whatthe outcome is?
Your performance,professionally and in everything
else, it don't get worse and itgets better.
Like the energy you show up andthat you bring to the table, to
the people that you'reinteracting with, is going to be
(11:42):
a million times more focused,more positive, more present,
because you got less junk inyour head.
Basically, that's it.
So we talked about guilt-freefuture planning, right.
Then we got.
We talked about strategicallyselfish scheduling, and so now
again we're going through thefunnel, right.
(12:02):
We start big picture long-term.
We use Mural for that.
We get into the strategicallyselfish scheduling.
We use a different tool for that.
We use our calendar.
It doesn't have to be like asuper fancy digital calendar.
It could be.
If you're like a daily plannerperson, same thing.
It doesn't matter what media itis, it's just that you have a
(12:23):
calendar and use it and startusing it just a little bit
differently.
Then it's like okay, now we'vekind of put some order and
sorted things out to so that wecan have a little more fun.
Now we're going to get intodaily domination.
Right, because all the planningin the world don't mean a damn
thing If you can't get shit done.
Period.
(12:43):
You know that you've workedwith people, that they got big
plans.
I'm going to, I'm thinkingabout this.
I got this project idea.
Like oh, oh, but they ain'tnever done nothing.
You don't want to be thatperson.
I would start losingcredibility.
Now.
The other thing is and I promiseI'm not calling anybody out
specifically I'm really talkingto the past, when I was double
(13:06):
booked on meetings, when I wassitting in a meeting at the
office on my computer doingstuff, I was losing credibility
when I'm having a conversationwith somebody.
While I'm on the phone, I'mlosing credibility.
So, me rushing around, panic,stress, sliding in right on time
(13:26):
and leaving I'm sorry, I got togo a little bit early, I got a
little bit, I got a hard.
Stop all this stuff.
What I was doing was I waslosing credibility.
It wasn't because I didn't knowhow to make things happen.
It was because I had overbookedand overcommitted myself and I
had no line of sight to how manycommitments I had made.
Sure, there's a conversation tobe had about saying no, we can
(13:49):
have that conversation and it isone of the tactics.
But for real, for real thereason and I'm stealing
Jennifer's quote fromyesterday's call there's no one
else to blame for me notguarding my time.
That's a me thing straight up.
That's a me thing straight up.
And so that's the whole point.
Here.
We're going to take ownership,we're going to get our hands
(14:10):
wrapped around this bad boy andstart getting more gooder.
So let's get into the dailydomination.
And this is where, like, therubber meets the road, and a lot
of people like to start here,and I've been asked like where
should I start?
Which one is going to bring methe greatest result and the
(14:35):
answer is it depends.
So if you're curious, like,where should you start?
Like you're like, yeah, jess,this sounds great, this is too
complicated.
Where should I start?
Long-term planning, schedulingor daily, drop me a comment, ask
me specifically so that I cangive, like, the specific cause.
It's a different answer foreverybody, kind of depending on
where their problem is.
Again, this is about executing.
This is about getting thingsdone.
Now, if you notice, we startedfuture planning and then, from
(14:58):
future planning, we took thatdown into scheduling.
That's getting plugged into ourcalendar One, two, three, four,
five, six weeks, as far outinto the future as you can and
now we've got the core, thematerial, the source material to
kick butt day by day.
And so what we do is say, okay,look at Monday, what are the
tests we have for Monday?
(15:18):
And we drop it into.
If anybody is familiar withScrum or Kanban personal Kanban
it's the same framework.
I've added some tweaks becausethere were things that I needed
and it turned out the peoplethat have been through the
previous workshops got a lot outof it.
So I'm like, okay, we're addingthis to the system.
And so the basic idea is focuson one thing at a time get the
(15:40):
things out of your head, makeyour work visible, prioritize it
and get it done.
Very simple, but you'll noticethere's a to-do column doing and
done, and then there's thesquirrel cage.
That's my little innovationthere, because we all get
distracted.
Right, we're all busy working,the phone rings, we get an idea,
we go through TikTok and we godown the wormhole or whatever it
(16:02):
is, and so for everybody it'sdifferent, but for me, the thing
that distracts me the most,that causes me to have to work
10, 12, 15, 16 hours on a thing,is ideas.
I'll get an idea aboutsomething and then I chase the
idea and then two and a halfhours later, I go crap.
I got to get that other thingdone.
I told him I was going to sendit to him by five, but I was off
(16:24):
lollygagging, right and so.
But here's the thing like I was, I had a little paranoia, like
if I don't do something with theidea, it's going to disappear
forever.
Oh my God.
And it could change the world.
So what I do now is, when Ihave an idea, instead of doing
something about it, I create acard and I put it in the swirl
cage so that I can stay focusedon the task that I'm working on
right now, and then I getanother idea or somebody texts
(16:45):
me but I'm in the middle of likereal deep work.
I'll create a card, so usuallyI'll just not answer it and look
back later.
But anyways, the point isthere's we all get distracted by
different things and we havecontrol over them, and using
this simple tool or thismethodology because I use Trello
specifically for this ofcapturing the squirrels, putting
(17:06):
them in the cage, because I cancome back and play with them
later so that I can stay focusedon the task at hand.
There's a whole bunch of tips inhere about tracking curveballs,
about what to reflect about andhow to reflect on it, and the
biggest, biggest, biggest onefor me, that is also one of
(17:27):
those people kind of like islike knowing your limits, and so
here's the question for you outthere in the omniverse Do you
even know how many commitments,how many things are you
committed to in one day?
Do you know what that count is?
My money says you don't.
The second thing is how manythings of those commitments do
(17:48):
you deliver on a daily basis?
If you don't know the firstnumber, you sure as hell don't
know the second number.
And so, when it comes to likecredibility now we're talking
about the say do ratio right,how many things that you say
you're going to do versus howmany things you actually do
takes us all the way back tocredibility.
And so, knowing my limits, I'veset a target of seven tasks per
(18:11):
day.
I used to have 15 tasks per day, but what did that do?
That made me a butthead.
I was rude, I was short withpeople, I didn't have time to
like give to people because Iwas like I got to get my 15 done
and that wasn't a goodexperience.
And so I've experimented andnow I'm down to seven and I
violate it regularly.
But the thing is, if I havemore than seven things on my
calendar for that day, I'm notgoing to schedule a meeting, I'm
(18:34):
not going to open space up forother people or other things
that aren't the priority, toinvade and impact my credibility
.
And so that's the dailydomination piece Overview again,
real quick summary.
That's the daily dominationpiece overview Again, real quick
summary.
The self-first time masteryframework is about building you
into your calendar.
(18:55):
It's about committing toyourself, it's about improving
your performance, improving yourdelivery and improving your
quality of life so you can showup better and be as awesome as
you can be more frequently,byron says.
At this stage in my lifeworking 10 plus hours a day,
including the commute with thewife and two young kids sleep is
(19:18):
usually what exactly.
Sleep is what gets sacrificed.
It's the only time I can focuson content creation, otherwise I
wouldn't make any real progress.
I feel you my friend and so youbring up a good point, because
this is a consistentconversation that we have in the
workshop.
It's like, yeah, but I havelike a real job, jesse, I don't
have.
I don't.
I'm not in Wonderland like yougallivanting around doing goofy
(19:41):
stuff all the time and I get,yeah, I get that you can apply
this methodology in the spacethat you have the most control,
meaning your nights and yourweekends.
I know that it can be appliedin the workspace, but you can
just use this methodology, thisself-first framework, in your
post-work hours and the weekendhours.
(20:03):
If you're interested or youknow people that could benefit
from some guilt-free futureplanning, strategically selfish
scheduling and daily domination,hit me up.
I'll give you the link to getthem signed up.
We're going to hold it.
We've got three classes comingup and there's going to be a
maximum of 15 people per cohort,so they're going to be filling
(20:23):
up pretty quick.
I hope to see you there.
Like many, many of you out there, hard chargers,
make it happeners.
You go out there, you makestuff happen.
You deliver at work, youdeliver at home, you deliver for
the softball team, but when itcomes down to like you
delivering for you and followingthrough on the like, the big,
impactful, meaningful thingsthat that have been on your
plate or that you've hadinterest and curiosity about,
(00:22):
you just don't find the time todo that.
So I was in that situation fora very long time Still looking
good, right, still making stuffhappen.
But you know, my exercisewasn't so great and that thing I
wanted to learn the language Iwanted to learn kind of kept
getting deprioritized for otherpeople's stuff.
Those things were good but Ihadn't figured out like how to
(00:43):
take care of myself and how tohonor myself.
It's over several years.
What I did was tinker aroundwith different things, because
there's like a bazillion timemanagement things, the Pomodoro
thing and you know, timeblocking and all these other
things, which is like conceptualand and I don't disagree with
them, actually they'reintegrated into this whole
(01:05):
framework.
But it took me applying a wholebunch of things progressively
over years, to kind of get clearabout what the hell it is that
I needed to do or I needed towork on, so that I can not just
be effective and deliver foreverybody else, but so that I
could also honor myself and makeprogress on those things.
(01:29):
You know, those hidden thingstaking salsa classes, spending
more time with family, spendingmore time with friends,
journaling, reflecting vacation,like all of those things.
They just they were going tohappen some point and sometime
in the future.
It's a high level, it's futureplanning, which is one thing,
and I'm going to get into someof the details so you guys
understand exactly like how thesystem progressively works, from
(01:52):
future long-term planning downto daily planning.
So if you are out there in theomniverse, drop a note in the
comments, let me know whereyou're calling in from.
So again, just a rebrand, arename, same thing, same energy,
same intent, same purpose, butwe're calling it the self-first
time mastery framework.
(02:12):
The key words there isself-first.
The 100% focus is on you as theindividual, and I got a little
framework to like help us makethat happen, because most of us
make it happeners are very, verygood at serving others.
We're very, very good at makingthings happen for other people
(02:32):
in our life and that'sabsolutely critically important,
but we're not as good as takingcare of ourselves, and so this
system not only is going to helpyou, like, amp up your
performance, your effectivenessand bring your stress down, but
it's also going to make you takecare of yourself, and it'll
help you do that.
So let's get into it Self-firsttime.
(02:53):
Mastery framework Can you tellI'm practicing Like I still
haven't mastered the muscles inmy mouth to say that well, and
so the first thing that we getinto is guilt-free future
planning, and we do this in thissequence.
We start with future planning,and by future planning you get
to define that.
(03:14):
Are you talking about a week, amonth, a quarter, a year,
depending on where your brain issome of us?
I'm just worried about the nextfour hours, bro.
Good, let's talk about thatfuture.
It could be a week, it could bemonths, it could be years.
I think I use it for likemonthly and quarterly.
And so when we're doing theguilt-free future planning, the
number one thing is you get tobe selfish and only think about
(03:35):
you, and I am like releasingeverybody of all guilt and all
fear.
I will carry that for youduring the workshop.
After the workshop, you can goand start worrying about
everybody else.
But at least I want you to getone rep in or I'm going to make
you get one rep in on thinkingabout you and putting yourself
(03:56):
first, prioritizing the thingsthat are important to you.
And so the first thing we do iswe just dump all the ideas
right, the things that we've hadin our plate, in the back of
our mind, that we want to getdone with relation related to,
like, your business or your job,right, your career, business,
job.
Now the other bucket ispersonal growth and then the
(04:18):
other bucket is meaningfulconnection.
So what we're looking for isall those things that you've
wanted to do, that you intendedto do that you've wanted to do
that you intended to do that youjust haven't done.
Now, critical point is thethings that you want to do, not
the things that you think youshould do or somebody else wants
you to do.
It's only the things that youreally, really want to do.
That man, I want to get thatthing done.
(04:38):
We get those out of our head.
After we get those out of ourhead, this is a whole group
experience, so everybody's kindof sharing and asking and it's a
lot of fun Then we go intoprioritizing and we use the DAMN
matrix D-A-M-N matrix to setpriority of all of those things
(04:58):
that are in our head to startbuilding momentum, right.
And so that is what we are doingright here in this space, in
the damn matrix, and then we say, okay, based on impact and
effort high impact, low effortlet's do that one first.
Let's just get it started,let's just get the ball rolling,
(05:18):
because that's how we getmomentum.
And then we get that littleball rolling, spin that plate,
and we say, okay, which one arewe going to do second?
All right, here's number twoHigh impact, low effort, let's
get that plate spinning, andthat's the whole point.
So we get it out of our head,we prioritize it and then we do,
we walk the plank which one'sgoing first, which one's going
(05:39):
second, which one's going third?
That's guilt-free futureplanning.
Jennifer says what helped me themost was getting all my stuff
out of my head and in astructured space.
Oh, I love it, jen, and that'sthe hard part, right, like
that's.
The thing is we don't reallyeven understand how much static
(05:59):
is in our head, like all thecommitments that we make and
intentions and ideas, like it'sall in there and and it gets
staticky and they start bangingup against each other and then
our stress goes up, and so thisis that's why we use the mural
board, so we get it out.
It's super visual and they'reall the same size and all of a
sudden they're not as big asthey used to be and we can move
them around, and then we couldsay, okay, that's not as
(06:20):
important.
Oh, these are really important.
I want to do these first.
That's it.
Just get it out of your head,give it some order.
That is how we do the guilt-freefuture planning.
Again, the main focus isplanning the stuff that is
important to you, not the stuffthat you think you should do,
that people want you to do.
That you're kind of like oh man, I got to do this.
(06:51):
No, no, no, no.
The things that you want to do,you just haven't done because
you've been putting other peopleahead of yourself.
So now we're going to go to thenext evolution.
So once we get past, once we dothe guilt-free future planning,
then we get into like, oh, nowit's time for action, right, and
we were thinking we werebrainstorming.
Action right, and we werethinking we were brainstorming.
Now we get into thestrategically selfish scheduling
which, again, if you can't tell, I'm using boxes and frameworks
(07:12):
and the mural board.
If you, when you sign up forthe workshop, you'll have that
link to go in there and accessthe mural and continue working
on it or copy it or do whateveryou want.
But it's just a nice venue orformat for it's very
user-friendly First time usersget the hang of it, get in here
and play.
Anyways, the strategicallyselfish scheduling.
So we talked about theguilt-free future planning.
(07:33):
Right, we get all this stuff outof our head, we prioritize it,
we walk the plank and then thenext step is to plug it into our
calendar.
Go find empty space in yourcalendar next week, two weeks
out, three weeks out, whateverit is.
But everybody finds out.
It's like, oh my God, mycalendar is full of junk, or I
don't have anything in mycalendar, but I know I have
commitments.
Exactly, it's all in our head.
(07:55):
We got to get it out of ourhead.
And so when we struggle werealize like man, our calendar,
we need to do some work on ourcalendar.
That's part of my problem ofnot being able to stay on top of
things, always rushing around,always double booked, never
having enough time right.
All of these things, I live it,we've all lived it.
Some cleaning, we're going torun the things to the firebox
(08:26):
right, and that's my justifiedversion of the Eisenhower matrix
, which I know.
A lot of people know theEisenhower matrix and I've been
thinking through it.
Using it as like a mental modelfor me has been extremely
helpful.
The problem for me is it saysright, if it's not important,
not urgent, stop doing it.
Like, yeah, I get that right,like intellectually, I
understand that, but it's notimportant, not urgent.
Stop doing it Like, yeah, I getthat Right, like intellectually
, I understand that.
But it's like, how the hell doyou stop doing it Right?
(08:47):
Some people like me need alittle extra help to like, ok,
but how do I stop, how do Idelegate, how do I do those
things?
And so that's why I made it,muddied it up with the firebox
Things that are urgent andimportant.
You're going to finish thosefirst Things that are important
(09:08):
and not urgent.
You're going to focus, investmore, focus time there, right,
which is not.
Again, it's a deviation.
But the things that areimportant and not urgent are the
things that we alwaysdeprioritize.
And here's the thing aboutthose things is those things
that we deprioritize will becomeurgent.
And I'm gonna give you a simpleexample Sleep, exercise,
nutrition.
How many times answer thisquestion to yourself or drop it
(09:30):
in the comments?
How many times have youdeprioritized sleep to get a
task done, to follow through anddo something or do a favor for
somebody else?
Right, it's not a big dealright now, but the more you
deprioritize sleep, yourperformance drops.
So it's not urgent, it'simportant, but if you keep
ignoring it, it turns into aproblem.
(09:51):
Same thing with exercise, samething with nutrition.
If you can't tell I'm down fromthree chins.
Now I only have two becauseI've historically deprioritized
my physical wellness it willbecome a problem, and when it's
a problem, it's a damn emergency, anyways.
So we take the things in ourcalendar.
We go like for real, for real,go to your calendar, get all of
(10:14):
the stuff out of next week, allthe things that you have in your
calendar and the things thatyou know you have to do that
aren't in your calendar.
And that always stirs abeautiful round of like, what do
you mean?
Like that's personal, it's likeyeah, my recommendation is
combine both of them.
So, anyways, we drop them inthat white section there there's
(10:35):
some instructions, and then weput them in the firebox Again.
Then we put them in the fireboxAgain, being ruthlessly selfish
.
Is it urgent and important tome?
Not to my boss, not to mygirlfriend, not to my wife, not
to anybody else, just to me.
And then, from that perspective, now we understand where they
(10:57):
sit so we can start doing somestrategery around how do we
minimize, how do we outsource,how do we delegate, and so forth
.
This one's a lot, a lot of fun,because now we're talking like
brass, brass, tacks, oh, mygoodness.
So that's phase two, right.
Phase one is guilt-free futureplanning.
Phase two is strategicallyselfish scheduling, and we're
(11:21):
going to get into dailydomination.
Next, I want to help youprioritize, you, be a better
friend to you, and guess whatthe outcome is?
Your performance,professionally and in everything
else, it don't get worse and itgets better.
Like the energy you show up andthat you bring to the table, to
the people that you'reinteracting with, is going to be
(11:42):
a million times more focused,more positive, more present,
because you got less junk inyour head.
Basically, that's it.
So we talked about guilt-freefuture planning, right.
Then we got.
We talked about strategicallyselfish scheduling, and so now
again we're going through thefunnel, right.
(12:02):
We start big picture long-term.
We use Mural for that.
We get into the strategicallyselfish scheduling.
We use a different tool for that.
We use our calendar.
It doesn't have to be like asuper fancy digital calendar.
It could be.
If you're like a daily plannerperson, same thing.
It doesn't matter what media itis, it's just that you have a
(12:23):
calendar and use it and startusing it just a little bit
differently.
Then it's like okay, now we'vekind of put some order and
sorted things out to so that wecan have a little more fun.
Now we're going to get intodaily domination.
Right, because all the planningin the world don't mean a damn
thing If you can't get shit done.
Period.
(12:43):
You know that you've workedwith people, that they got big
plans.
I'm going to, I'm thinkingabout this.
I got this project idea.
Like oh, oh, but they ain'tnever done nothing.
You don't want to be thatperson.
I would start losingcredibility.
Now.
The other thing is and I promiseI'm not calling anybody out
specifically I'm really talkingto the past, when I was double
(13:06):
booked on meetings, when I wassitting in a meeting at the
office on my computer doingstuff, I was losing credibility
when I'm having a conversationwith somebody.
While I'm on the phone, I'mlosing credibility.
So, me rushing around, panic,stress, sliding in right on time
(13:26):
and leaving I'm sorry, I got togo a little bit early, I got a
little bit, I got a hard.
Stop all this stuff.
What I was doing was I waslosing credibility.
It wasn't because I didn't knowhow to make things happen.
It was because I had overbookedand overcommitted myself and I
had no line of sight to how manycommitments I had made.
Sure, there's a conversation tobe had about saying no, we can
(13:49):
have that conversation and it isone of the tactics.
But for real, for real thereason and I'm stealing
Jennifer's quote fromyesterday's call there's no one
else to blame for me notguarding my time.
That's a me thing straight up.
That's a me thing straight up.
And so that's the whole point.
Here.
We're going to take ownership,we're going to get our hands
(14:10):
wrapped around this bad boy andstart getting more gooder.
So let's get into the dailydomination.
And this is where, like, therubber meets the road, and a lot
of people like to start here,and I've been asked like where
should I start?
Which one is going to bring methe greatest result and the
(14:35):
answer is it depends.
So if you're curious, like,where should you start?
Like you're like, yeah, jess,this sounds great, this is too
complicated.
Where should I start?
Long-term planning, schedulingor daily, drop me a comment, ask
me specifically so that I cangive, like, the specific cause.
It's a different answer foreverybody, kind of depending on
where their problem is.
Again, this is about executing.
This is about getting thingsdone.
Now, if you notice, we startedfuture planning and then, from
(14:58):
future planning, we took thatdown into scheduling.
That's getting plugged into ourcalendar One, two, three, four,
five, six weeks, as far outinto the future as you can and
now we've got the core, thematerial, the source material to
kick butt day by day.
And so what we do is say, okay,look at Monday, what are the
tests we have for Monday?
(15:18):
And we drop it into.
If anybody is familiar withScrum or Kanban personal Kanban
it's the same framework.
I've added some tweaks becausethere were things that I needed
and it turned out the peoplethat have been through the
previous workshops got a lot outof it.
So I'm like, okay, we're addingthis to the system.
And so the basic idea is focuson one thing at a time get the
(15:40):
things out of your head, makeyour work visible, prioritize it
and get it done.
Very simple, but you'll noticethere's a to-do column doing and
done, and then there's thesquirrel cage.
That's my little innovationthere, because we all get
distracted.
Right, we're all busy working,the phone rings, we get an idea,
we go through TikTok and we godown the wormhole or whatever it
(16:02):
is, and so for everybody it'sdifferent, but for me, the thing
that distracts me the most,that causes me to have to work
10, 12, 15, 16 hours on a thing,is ideas.
I'll get an idea aboutsomething and then I chase the
idea and then two and a halfhours later, I go crap.
I got to get that other thingdone.
I told him I was going to sendit to him by five, but I was off
(16:24):
lollygagging, right and so.
But here's the thing like I was, I had a little paranoia, like
if I don't do something with theidea, it's going to disappear
forever.
Oh my God.
And it could change the world.
So what I do now is, when Ihave an idea, instead of doing
something about it, I create acard and I put it in the swirl
cage so that I can stay focusedon the task that I'm working on
right now, and then I getanother idea or somebody texts
(16:45):
me but I'm in the middle of likereal deep work.
I'll create a card, so usuallyI'll just not answer it and look
back later.
But anyways, the point isthere's we all get distracted by
different things and we havecontrol over them, and using
this simple tool or thismethodology because I use Trello
specifically for this ofcapturing the squirrels, putting
(17:06):
them in the cage, because I cancome back and play with them
later so that I can stay focusedon the task at hand.
There's a whole bunch of tips inhere about tracking curveballs,
about what to reflect about andhow to reflect on it, and the
biggest, biggest, biggest onefor me, that is also one of
(17:27):
those people kind of like islike knowing your limits, and so
here's the question for you outthere in the omniverse Do you
even know how many commitments,how many things are you
committed to in one day?
Do you know what that count is?
My money says you don't.
The second thing is how manythings of those commitments do
(17:48):
you deliver on a daily basis?
If you don't know the firstnumber, you sure as hell don't
know the second number.
And so, when it comes to likecredibility now we're talking
about the say do ratio right,how many things that you say
you're going to do versus howmany things you actually do
takes us all the way back tocredibility.
And so, knowing my limits, I'veset a target of seven tasks per
(18:11):
day.
I used to have 15 tasks per day, but what did that do?
That made me a butthead.
I was rude, I was short withpeople, I didn't have time to
like give to people because Iwas like I got to get my 15 done
and that wasn't a goodexperience.
And so I've experimented andnow I'm down to seven and I
violate it regularly.
But the thing is, if I havemore than seven things on my
calendar for that day, I'm notgoing to schedule a meeting, I'm
(18:34):
not going to open space up forother people or other things
that aren't the priority, toinvade and impact my credibility
.
And so that's the dailydomination piece Overview again,
real quick summary.
That's the daily dominationpiece overview Again, real quick
summary.
The self-first time masteryframework is about building you
into your calendar.
(18:55):
It's about committing toyourself, it's about improving
your performance, improving yourdelivery and improving your
quality of life so you can showup better and be as awesome as
you can be more frequently,byron says.
At this stage in my lifeworking 10 plus hours a day,
including the commute with thewife and two young kids sleep is
(19:18):
usually what exactly.
Sleep is what gets sacrificed.
It's the only time I can focuson content creation, otherwise I
wouldn't make any real progress.
I feel you my friend and so youbring up a good point, because
this is a consistentconversation that we have in the
workshop.
It's like, yeah, but I havelike a real job, jesse, I don't
have.
I don't.
I'm not in Wonderland like yougallivanting around doing goofy
(19:41):
stuff all the time and I get,yeah, I get that you can apply
this methodology in the spacethat you have the most control,
meaning your nights and yourweekends.
I know that it can be appliedin the workspace, but you can
just use this methodology, thisself-first framework, in your
post-work hours and the weekendhours.
(20:03):
If you're interested or youknow people that could benefit
from some guilt-free futureplanning, strategically selfish
scheduling and daily domination,hit me up.
I'll give you the link to getthem signed up.
We're going to hold it.
We've got three classes comingup and there's going to be a
maximum of 15 people per cohort,so they're going to be filling
(20:23):
up pretty quick.
I hope to see you there.
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