How to Handle Difficult People with Wisdom and Grace

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Episode 4, wisdom for Difficult People Series.
Wisdom for Every Relationship.
Hi, friends, and welcome backto Lessons for Life with James
Long Jr.
It's a joy to have you with metoday.
We're moving forward with ourWisdom for Every Relationship
series, and today's topic is onethat touches every single one

(00:20):
of us.
How do we walk wisely withdifficult people?
One of us how do we walk wiselywith difficult people?
If you've ever felt drained,frustrated or even discouraged
by a difficult relationship,you're not alone.
The good news is that God'sWord gives us wisdom for exactly
these situations.
Let us dive in together.

(00:40):
Everyone has difficult people intheir lives.
It might be a family member whonever apologizes, a co-worker
who always criticizes, or afriend who drains your emotional
energy, or even a fellowbeliever who seems impossible to
please.
Our natural response is oftento fight back, withdraw in
frustration or gossip about thembehind their backs.

(01:02):
But Scripture calls us to adifferent path, a wiser path, a
gospel-shaped way of relating,even when it's hard.
Today we'll look at how toengage with difficult people
without losing your peace, yourintegrity or your testimony.
Let's begin with a few Scripture.
In Romans 12, verse 18, it saysthis If possible, so far as it

(01:27):
depends upon you.
Live peaceably with all.
Proverbs 15, verse 1, remindsus A gentle answer turns away
wrath, but a harsh word stirs upanger.
And James 3, verse 17,describes God's wisdom as pure,
then peaceable, gentle, open toreason, full of mercy and good

(01:50):
fruits.
Notice, scripture neverguarantees that relationships
will be easy, but itconsistently calls us to live
with wisdom, peace and humility,even when others don't First.
Examine yourself first Beforelabeling someone else as
difficult.
Wisdom invites us toself-reflection, as Jesus said

(02:11):
in Matthew 7, verse 3, why doyou see the speck that is in
your brother's eye but you donot notice the log that is in
your own eye?
Ask yourself have I contributedto the tension?
Am I reacting out of pride,fear or insecurity?
Have I communicated clearly andhumbly?
Sometimes what we perceive asdifficulties in others may

(02:34):
actually reveal areas God wantsto address in us.
Second, refuse to take the bait.
Difficult people often stir ouremotions, whether it's
intentional or not.
Wisdom means choosingself-control over impulsive
reaction.
Proverbs 26, verse 4, says Donot answer a fool according to

(02:57):
his folly, lest you become likehim yourself.
You don't have to engage everyaccusation.
You don't have to defend everymisunderstanding.
You don't have to match angerwith anger.
A gentle answer oftende-escalates tension faster than
you think.
Third, set loving boundaries.

(03:17):
Jesus loved everyone, but hedidn't entrust himself to
everyone.
Sometimes wisdom means creatinghealthy distance while
maintaining a posture of love.
Proverbs 23, verse 3, says theprudent sees danger and hides
himself, but the simple go onand suffer for it.
You can limit emotional accesswith chronically hurtful people.

(03:41):
Clarify expectations andcommunicate boundaries.
Walk away kindly whenengagement would only fuel
conflict.
Setting boundaries is notunloving, it's an act of
stewardship.
Imagine a co-worker whoconstantly criticizes you, both
privately and publicly.
The worldly response might beto lash out gossip or to

(04:03):
sabotage them in return.
But godly wisdom says respondgently when confronted.
Set a private meeting toclarify issues.
If needed, refuse to carrybitterness in your heart.
You might not change theco-worker's behavior, but you
can guard your own heart andmaintain your witness.
Take a moment to reflect who inyour life consistently feels

(04:26):
difficult to engage with.
How have you been responding?
Reactively or wisely?
Where might God be inviting youto set healthier boundaries and
to extend surprising grace?
You are responsible for yourfaithfulness, not for the other
person's responses.
This week, here's yourchallenge Identify one difficult

(04:49):
relationship.
Pray specifically for thatperson by name.
Ask God for wisdom to respondwith grace, truth and
self-control.
You may not be able to changethem, but by God's grace, you
can change the atmosphere youbring in that relationship.
If you'd like to continuegrowing in relational wisdom, I

(05:10):
invite you to join our communityat communityjameslongjrorg.
That's communityjameslongjrorg.
There you'll find resources,encouragement and support for
navigating every kind ofrelationship through the lens of
the gospel.
If you want to exploredifferent membership options and

(05:32):
the many tools available, visitour website, jameslongjrorg
slash.
Sign up now.
We would love to walk thisjourney with you.
Let's pray together.
Father, thank you for yourpatience with us.
Teach us to extend the samepatience and wisdom to those who

(05:52):
are difficult in our lives.
Give us the strength to lovethose without enabling sin, and
the courage to set boundarieswithout bitterness and the grace
to forgive even when it is hard.
Make us instruments of yourpeace in this broken world.
In your son's name we pray,amen.
Well, thank you for joining ustoday.

(06:12):
I look forward to being withyou next time as we explore
wisdom for the workplace.