August 3, 2025 • 27 mins
The Swirl of Chaos—Jump Out!
Join our Sunday morning chat where we discuss feeling the chaos in the world right now. News has been a literal tsunami, earth quakes, wildfires in Canada, starving kids in Gaza, a continued war in Ukraine, and politics not serving the people that are hurting. The old show Get Smart on TV called the enemy “Chaos”— It does us no good to stay in it’s spin. What can help us get out of it—what helps you get out of it? Calling a friend, resting and rejuvenating, reaching out, witnessing and listening to another. Seeing the promise of youth. What is one thing that you could do for someone else? Those things make a difference in the world. Remember friends there is more good than bad, and there are lots of helpers. You are one of them. Peace and Love. Like and share. Leave us a comment.
I am still collecting for José's cancer treatments. We are awaiting the next CT Scans that will tell you where he is after his second round of treatments. Thank you for your continued support!
https://gofund.me/e6f61999
In addition to being a podcast host, Hess is also an LCSW--if you'd like to learn more about her work as a therapist, check it out at www.jessicabollinger.com
One of her mission's is for all of our lights to shine--when we see each other and allow ourself to be seen--and we can say to the person in front of us, There You Are! the world will be an amazing place!
Delbert is a top realtor in Louisville, KY, and you can find her at Kentucky Select Properties She will help you find your home, and also help you get the most equity when you sell your house.
Her philanthropic work to continue her sister Carole and niece Meghan is Carole's Kitchen. Blessings in a Backpack helps feed the many hungry students in our schools. The instagram account is: https://www.instagram.com/caroleskitchen.nonprofit?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==
...
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Hess (00:01):
Welcome everybody.
My name is Hess and you havejoined us for the Sunday morning
chat.
I'm sitting in my white chair,Delbert, looking out the
morning, Sunday morning here atCarriage Station Farm.
Tell us what the weather reportis from the green couch.
Delbert (00:17):
Oh gosh.
Good morning everybody.
I'm on the green couch inLouisville, Kentucky looking out
my picture window.
It was a beautiful sunrise thismorning, the big pink swirl that
we talk about and blue skies.
It's just gorgeous today.
Get out and enjoy it if you can.
(00:39):
Pretty.
pretty.
So Hess and I normally we comeup with a topic and then.
then we just talked before ourpodcast on Sunday morning, but
been so much going on in theworld.
Hess actually texted me lastnight and and called me
Hess (00:59):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Delbert (01:00):
Hannah wanted to talk about, the fact that our podcast
is.
Is going on in a really unusualor incredible time in history,
and we wanna timestamp thingswith our podcast talk about some
of the chaos that's in the worldright now.
And then a line that mygrandmother ma'am Dorothy,
(01:23):
always said to me that for somereason there's some things that
are spoken to you in your lifethat.
You really hold onto whetherthey're good or bad?
of mine are good and this oneline that my mama used to say is
be still, two little words.
Be still.
She used to say it in mass alot.
(01:47):
but as I got older, she said ita little more often it's a very
good tool when there's chaosaround you.
I think sometimes our instinctis to get involved in it and
really counterintuitive, and themost effective way to deal with
it is just to be still for amoment and to take it in and
(02:10):
then get your thoughts togetheron how you're gonna.
Command it, how you're gonnadeal with it.
I told Hess that because there'sa lot, there's a lot of chaos
Hess going on in the worldtoday.
Hess (02:23):
That's right Bert.
And the first two weeks of JulyI was on the water on the Rideau
canal with my friend Melinda.
And it was a lot stiller there.
That I was in touch and attunedto the weather 24 hours a day to
the mosquitoes after 7:00 PM towater conditions, bathing in the
(02:43):
lake water and then returninghome like for the last two
weeks.
I'm back here at the farm.
I'm doing great.
My clients are doing great work.
But I'm in touch more with thewith the news.
I read the local newspaper everyday at breakfast and so I'm
plugging in more to the news andbaby, lots of it keeps spinning
(03:04):
and spinning in my head.
And Delbert you were talkingabout, and I think it was on Get
Smart, where the enemy wasn'tthe enemy of Get Smart called
chaos.
Delbert (03:14):
Yeah, they
Hess (03:15):
It's called chaos.
Delbert (03:16):
Yeah.
Hess (03:17):
And they depicted chaos.
Like a kaleidoscope, this thing,like spun right.
Delbert (03:22):
I think the kaleidoscope more was I mean
they did create chaos, theenemy.
But the scenes that I remembermost that had that kaleidoscope,
that swirl, not the good pinkswirl, like the sunrise, but a.
A mind boggling swirl that wasmeant to confuse you, was on
like HR puff and stuff.
Do you remember that?
(03:43):
Show,
Hess (03:44):
Yeah.
Delbert (03:44):
and witchy poo, she would, create the spin.
It was just an effect, a specialeffect or a graphic, and it was
just like, it was just like apinwheel spinning.
And the person that was.
Being confused was stuck in thatpinwheel and they'd just swirl
around on the screen and you'dthink, oh my goodness, I I never
(04:05):
get stuck by witchy poo.
And, but that's how it feelsright now when you get up and
read some of the news.
We feel like we might be stuckin one of those,
Hess (04:13):
Yeah just just this week it was a real tsunami and the
other waves of news of wildfiresin Canada, starvation in Gaza,
continued war in Ukraine, thethreat that Medicare might be
cut off that kids might not gettheir get the food they need and
education will be cut
Delbert (04:33):
Yeah.
Hess (04:34):
Medicare cuts.
So Delbert, I just I foundmyself yesterday physically
exhausted and.
Yesterday I had done really goodphysical movement.
And that's something too, I'vegot this book I'm reading right
now, the Healing AnxietyWorkbook and part of it is like
what you've also said a lot oftimes to me on these Sunday
(04:55):
morning chats, Delbert is move,get out and move your body.
And that can be a big help.
And I, yesterday, Bert.
I had ridden my horse in themorning and ridden up and down
the hill and that is connectingand helps me ground myself.
Delbert (05:12):
Grounding.
Yeah.
Hess (05:13):
Then I had a paddle up the Elkhorn Creek with some friends,
and that wasn't too strenuousand that was beautiful, but
Delbert, when I got home, I wasexhausted and there was no
physical reason for me to beexhausted.
But just the chaos and the swirlof the news in my head, and it
(05:34):
was really tiring.
And I just, when I got home, Ilaid down and Leanne Morgan has
a new Netflix series I justfound out about, so I turned on
Leanne on, on Netflix and then Igot a text from a friend from
Louisville that his son's in atennis tournament up here in
Lexington, and he was gonna beplaying at five 30, a half an
(05:55):
hour away.
So I just jumped up and I went,and that was exactly what I
needed.
I saw friends that are close toour family, somebody that I
watched grow up who my dadmentored, and then I feel like
he's like a brother to me.
And then his only son has takenup tennis and it was so
beautiful to witness a.
(06:16):
These spectacular shots fromthis little 12-year-old who
spends five hours a day playing,and he loves it, and he is
disciplined and he is focusedand was an inspiration to me.
So in the swirl of the outsideworld, all of those things I had
on my mind.
Here's this youngster who'smaking a difference on something
that he loves.
So I didn't feel exhaustedanymore.
(06:37):
I felt refreshed, and it took meout of the chaos.
Delbert (06:41):
Something that helps us when we're in chaos is just to
be still for a moment.
Like just to lay down and bestill and get rejuvenated so you
can go on to the next bestthing, which is just what you
needed, I saw a lot of Catholicinfluencers on Instagram and saw
where a lot of young people fromall over the world had done a
(07:01):
pilgrimage to Rome and Pope Leostepped out, and St.
Peter Square and just said tothese young people, you are the
light of the world.
Hess (07:11):
Whoa.
Delbert (07:11):
Those are things just like seeing this young person.
Watch play tennis.
Those are things that give ushope, that, that fill our
hearts, that say yes.
Young people are the light ofthe world.
We need to take care of them.
It's one of the things that canground us and help us be still
(07:32):
be aware, but just focus on thethings that we can control.
Focus on what we can control andsometimes we just have to let go
of the things that are out ofour control.
It's part of the SerenityPrayer.
The prayer of St.
Francis says that, so you justfocus on what you can control.
(07:52):
And part of self-care is justwhat we do, Hess, we call each
other, we talk to each other.
We talk it out in our, work itout
Hess (08:02):
Our Sunday morning chats.
Delbert (08:04):
Sunday morning chats.
I had just a hectic work weekwith work where I hadn't been
off for a solid week and justhad a lot to do for my clients,
and I would just only catchsnippets of the news and would
catch, these starving childrenand babies in Gaza, which is
something super close to myheart with my family's charity,
(08:26):
Carol's Kitchen.
And I just couldn't stand it.
I couldn't even stand watchingit, and I just felt so
overwhelmed with grief, and feltjust so out of control and.
One of the things I didyesterday, I finally had my
first day off and I went toTurner's by the river and talked
(08:46):
to my high school friends thatare members with me.
We had a great time.
it was a beautiful day.
And then we went to, kingfish onthe river, and I said, I think
hush puppies and staring at theriver might be a form of
southern meditation.
I don't know.
But it gave me my bounce back,and I could come home and think
about Carol's kitchen.
(09:06):
What I've got planned for thisnew school year for the kids
here in Louisville, Kentucky,which is what I can control.
Hess (09:16):
So what I'm hearing you say, Delbert is that gave you
that rest and rejuvenation.
Delbert (09:20):
Right?
Hess (09:21):
You could come back and then you focus on something that
you can do.
Delbert (09:25):
Exactly.
Exactly.
And, when we're in chaos,really, the first thing is just
to do what Mamaw Dorothy said,be still focus on what you can
control, and then acknowledgeand accept, like I just said.
But the next thing, and we'vetalked so much in the past
couple weeks about, imaginingand then the possibilities of
(09:47):
our imagination and how to makeour dreams a reality.
Same thing, really, all thosetools apply really managing
chaos and managing your life.
Do stress reduction, which iswhat you and I both did
yesterday, reduce your stress.
Hess (10:06):
And then out of that imagination and then being able
to see possibility.
Delbert (10:11):
All those deep breaths you talk about are meditation
that we talk about.
I got to spread my gold lightreally far this morning because
I was more relaxed.
I was telling Hess, sometimeswhen I do my morning meditation
this week, I was like, oh, Ineed to remember here and I need
to remember there and all, Gaza,Israel, Iran, the Ukraine, our
(10:33):
own country.
Alligator Alcatraz.
Good
Hess (10:36):
Right.
Delbert (10:37):
All these things.
All these things that justdistract us and.
We don't even know.
There's so much, How we cancontrol it.
If you take those deep breathsand you meditate my gold light
spread like butter.
Like butter this morning.
Hess (10:53):
Sweet.
Sweet.
I love it.
Thanks, Bert.
Like when I'm driving my boatdown the road and it's a, it's,
I'm, it's pretty heavy and it'sbig and I only go 60 miles an
hour.
And when I look in my sidemirror and I see these big semis
coming up on me, I'll start toget tense and I'll start to feel
the swirl of chaos.
And if I take a deep breath inand release that activates the
(11:17):
vagus nerve, and then I relaxand the truck goes by.
So yeah, taking deep breaths, ithelps in the chaos.
Delbert something.
I do that.
This is just a depiction aboutsomething that's small that
takes me to a moment that givesme focus is the eyedrops that I
put in our Boston Terrier'seyes.
(11:38):
Tessa.
An eye because she, she had aretina detachment and had an eye
removed, so we have to give hereye drops three times a day in
this eye, and our alarms are setfor 7:00 AM 1:00 PM 7:00 PM.
And when that alarm goes off,put her on the top of the couch,
(11:59):
get the specific eye drop, tilther head up.
I'm watching this little tinyvile and I'm watching this
little drop.
I turn the vile and this littledrop comes out and lays right in
her eye and she blinks.
And just that minute focus likethat is calming and centering
for me.
So that's an aspect of themindfulness, a mindful practice
(12:23):
that I do.
Delbert (12:24):
exactly.
I do that with house cleaning'cause it makes me feel
connected to my mom.
Cleaning is almost like a littlemeditation for me.
Any kinda little chore that youcan gardening, you can get into
that just calms you Just makesyou hyper aware of something.
Outside the outside world.
(12:44):
Yeah.
Hess (12:45):
A, a mindful routine, just being mindful why you do that,
Delbert (12:49):
Yes,
Hess (12:51):
using the dawn, like you said, that your mom uses.
Delbert (12:54):
Yes, I hope our first sponsors Dawn Dish Washing
Liquid.
'cause I love it so much and mymom used it for everything and
now I use it for everything.
I even scrubbed my tub out withit because it's just, it just is
such a good cleaning product andthey, and I always think about
the little ducks and the littleanimals that get coated by the
(13:15):
oil spill.
They can wash'em off with dawn.
Because it cuts through oil andgrease and it makes their, and
then they run across the screenwith their little fluffy
feathers.
Okay, I digress.
Hess (13:26):
Yeah, a yoga practice.
Some people might
Delbert (13:29):
yoga is good.
Yes
Hess (13:32):
a class that can take you off the grid for an hour.
Delbert (13:35):
yes.
Pilates,
Hess (13:37):
Call a.
Delbert (13:39):
your friends.
Call your friends.
Call your family.
And focus on things that you cando.
And honestly, when you focus onthings, you can break'em down
into small, digestible items andthen prioritize on the things
that are really important inyour life.
(13:59):
Like I can prioritize feedingchildren in Jefferson County in
Louisville, Kentucky.
Hess (14:06):
Delbert as we're talking and you all, this is what the
Sunday morning conversationshave always done for me that
we've done over the past years,Delbert, and why we wanted to
give it out here to the worldthat.
Just being able to talk it outand talk with a friend.
It just really helps it absolveit because it doesn't do us any
(14:26):
good to stay in the chaos,
Delbert (14:29):
No.
Hess (14:29):
stay in that pen.
Pin pinwheel of spin.
It doesn't do anybody any good.
Delbert (14:36):
Yes.
as a country, I think that we'vegotta figure that out.
Listen to each other and get outof this sw that co confusion
swirl that can confusion pinwill.
Hess (14:48):
Delbert, you just said the word listen.
Even when you're talking withsomebody, being totally present
when you listen to that personis a mindful practice.
And so I pulled up this poemabout listening by my friend
Jane Gumple Can I read it?
Delbert (15:06):
Sure.
Hess (15:08):
All right, so well as Jane Gumple is an is an Imago
relationship therapist, Imagorelationship therapy guys is the
most wonderful relationship workthat you could do.
And it really teaches anintentional dialogue practice
where you really listen andcross the bridge to the other
person's world.
And when you listen, you mirrorand then you ask, is there more?
(15:30):
And then you mirror, you're notlistening to try to figure out
what you're gonna say next.
You're just really listening.
So that's the background aboutJane Gumple So here's her poem,
and the poem is titled, do IHave That Right?
It's a poem of sacred listening.
It's not a trick of language,not a therapist tool, not a step
(15:52):
to rush through on the way tobeing wise.
It's the opening of a gate, asoft knocking at the door of
another soul.
Do I have that right?
It's not just a question, it's abow.
It says, I have heard you.
(16:13):
I'm willing to be changed bywhat I've heard.
I will stay here long enough tohear it again.
In your words, it says, you arenot alone.
Inside this story, I havestepped in with you not to fix
or solve.
(16:33):
To witness.
Sometimes it is the first time aheart has been met without
defense, and in that stillness,healing begins for in this
sacred pause, this simple act ofasking.
We do not offer answers we offerLove Jane Gumple
Delbert (16:58):
Oh, that's beautiful.
Hess (17:00):
That's a centering thing that we can do whenever we're
listening or talking tosomebody, is it's just really
listening.
And then is there more and it'sbeautiful.
Delbert (17:13):
Love
Hess (17:13):
Yeah.
Yeah so it could be all sorts ofthings that you do.
The mindful practice of cleaningyour house, of putting an eye
drop in your dog's eyes justthere watching this little boy
hit this tennis ball, watchinghis concentration, hearing that
(17:34):
he practices five hours a day.
All the ways.
Delbert, you were talking aboutone of the little girls at your
schools that helps with the withthe kitchen with Carol's kitchen
or is it the back the foodpantry there where she helps,
she's in need of food and she'sgot this little sister that she
takes care of?
No, just this beautiful seeingsomeone really getting somebody.
Delbert (18:00):
I, I love that.
So many of our kids that help atour pantry also use the pantry
themselves.
They volunteer to set the foodout and and they are always, all
of'em, so mindful of what theiryounger siblings might need.
They'll pack a bag, oh, mylittle brother likes this.
My little sister likes that.
(18:21):
And I, it's such a beautifulthing that they're, they're
taking care of their family atsuch a young age, just still in
high school.
And I'll tell you, the quickestway to heal yourself is to take
care of somebody else.
Hess (18:36):
Yeah, for sure.
What's one small way that youcan take care of somebody else?
Absolutely.
That always can get us out ofour funk or out of the chaos for
sure.
Delbert (18:48):
It is,
Hess (18:49):
Love it.
Delbert (18:49):
do, has to have to do a little bit of housekeeping.
'cause I think last week I saidabout Governor Beshear's housing
initiative and I said billioninstead of million.
But he is got affordable housingincentives in Western and
eastern Kentucky.
But the budget is less than whatI said.
(19:10):
I wish it was a billion, but,it's 9.5 in Western Kentucky and
Warren County for affordablehousing.
And 223 million in EasternKentucky where they were hit by
the tornado.
But
Hess (19:25):
Wow.
Everything helps.
Helps.
Delbert (19:28):
yes.
Everything does help and tothink about people homeless and
struggling.
It makes me I was with myfriends, like I said at Turner's
and we were just saying,sometimes you just have to stop
and say, I'm really thankful forthese four walls and these
(19:50):
electricity and this plumbingwhen you see what's going on in
the world and even in our owncountry, in our own state.
Just to be thankful and withthat mindfulness.
To also stay focused on hope.
Hess (20:06):
Yeah,
Delbert (20:07):
that things are gonna get better.
I do
Hess (20:09):
sure.
Delbert (20:09):
that there's more good in the world.
I do believe that the youth ofour world are the light of the
world and our hope.
And, I'm gonna stay focused onhope.
I'm not gonna get caught in thatpinwheel of chaos.
I'm gonna try to be mindful andbe still like Mamaw Dorothy
says.
Hess (20:30):
And the signature on my email says this Delbert.
Where a student asked Butlerwhat the answer is to ending the
suffering in the world, shereplies, there's no single
answer that will solve all ofour future problems or all of
our problems.
There's no magic bullet.
Instead, there are thousands ofanswers at least, and you can be
(20:51):
one of them if you choose to be.
So just the small one thing thatyou can do just yourself, taking
yourself out of the chaos isgood for the world.
Delbert (21:00):
Yes, it totally is.
Hess (21:02):
What is one thing I can do for somebody else?
Where's somebody in need and howcan I show up?
And me showing up for thatlittle boy to be a witness and
see him and then eat dinner andsitting across.
And then for me to stand up andsay what I loved about how I saw
him swing his racket.
I he felt that he got feedback.
I was there, I was a witness tohim.
(21:25):
Yeah.
I love you and it always groundsme and centers me.
Think about if you're feelinglike you're in the chaotic
swirl, take care of yourself.
Be mindful.
Do one small thing to jump outof it and do one small thing for
somebody else.
You make a difference.
Delbert (21:47):
Stay focused on hope.
We love you friends.
Hess (21:51):
We love you.
You all take care, peace andlove.
Delbert (21:55):
Peace and love.
Welcome everybody.
My name is Hess and you havejoined us for the Sunday morning
chat.
I'm sitting in my white chair,Delbert, looking out the
morning, Sunday morning here atCarriage Station Farm.
Tell us what the weather reportis from the green couch.
Delbert (00:17):
Oh gosh.
Good morning everybody.
I'm on the green couch inLouisville, Kentucky looking out
my picture window.
It was a beautiful sunrise thismorning, the big pink swirl that
we talk about and blue skies.
It's just gorgeous today.
Get out and enjoy it if you can.
(00:39):
Pretty.
pretty.
So Hess and I normally we comeup with a topic and then.
then we just talked before ourpodcast on Sunday morning, but
been so much going on in theworld.
Hess actually texted me lastnight and and called me
Hess (00:59):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Delbert (01:00):
Hannah wanted to talk about, the fact that our podcast
is.
Is going on in a really unusualor incredible time in history,
and we wanna timestamp thingswith our podcast talk about some
of the chaos that's in the worldright now.
And then a line that mygrandmother ma'am Dorothy,
(01:23):
always said to me that for somereason there's some things that
are spoken to you in your lifethat.
You really hold onto whetherthey're good or bad?
of mine are good and this oneline that my mama used to say is
be still, two little words.
Be still.
She used to say it in mass alot.
(01:47):
but as I got older, she said ita little more often it's a very
good tool when there's chaosaround you.
I think sometimes our instinctis to get involved in it and
really counterintuitive, and themost effective way to deal with
it is just to be still for amoment and to take it in and
(02:10):
then get your thoughts togetheron how you're gonna.
Command it, how you're gonnadeal with it.
I told Hess that because there'sa lot, there's a lot of chaos
Hess going on in the worldtoday.
Hess (02:23):
That's right Bert.
And the first two weeks of JulyI was on the water on the Rideau
canal with my friend Melinda.
And it was a lot stiller there.
That I was in touch and attunedto the weather 24 hours a day to
the mosquitoes after 7:00 PM towater conditions, bathing in the
(02:43):
lake water and then returninghome like for the last two
weeks.
I'm back here at the farm.
I'm doing great.
My clients are doing great work.
But I'm in touch more with thewith the news.
I read the local newspaper everyday at breakfast and so I'm
plugging in more to the news andbaby, lots of it keeps spinning
(03:04):
and spinning in my head.
And Delbert you were talkingabout, and I think it was on Get
Smart, where the enemy wasn'tthe enemy of Get Smart called
chaos.
Delbert (03:14):
Yeah, they
Hess (03:15):
It's called chaos.
Delbert (03:16):
Yeah.
Hess (03:17):
And they depicted chaos.
Like a kaleidoscope, this thing,like spun right.
Delbert (03:22):
I think the kaleidoscope more was I mean
they did create chaos, theenemy.
But the scenes that I remembermost that had that kaleidoscope,
that swirl, not the good pinkswirl, like the sunrise, but a.
A mind boggling swirl that wasmeant to confuse you, was on
like HR puff and stuff.
Do you remember that?
(03:43):
Show,
Hess (03:44):
Yeah.
Delbert (03:44):
and witchy poo, she would, create the spin.
It was just an effect, a specialeffect or a graphic, and it was
just like, it was just like apinwheel spinning.
And the person that was.
Being confused was stuck in thatpinwheel and they'd just swirl
around on the screen and you'dthink, oh my goodness, I I never
(04:05):
get stuck by witchy poo.
And, but that's how it feelsright now when you get up and
read some of the news.
We feel like we might be stuckin one of those,
Hess (04:13):
Yeah just just this week it was a real tsunami and the
other waves of news of wildfiresin Canada, starvation in Gaza,
continued war in Ukraine, thethreat that Medicare might be
cut off that kids might not gettheir get the food they need and
education will be cut
Delbert (04:33):
Yeah.
Hess (04:34):
Medicare cuts.
So Delbert, I just I foundmyself yesterday physically
exhausted and.
Yesterday I had done really goodphysical movement.
And that's something too, I'vegot this book I'm reading right
now, the Healing AnxietyWorkbook and part of it is like
what you've also said a lot oftimes to me on these Sunday
(04:55):
morning chats, Delbert is move,get out and move your body.
And that can be a big help.
And I, yesterday, Bert.
I had ridden my horse in themorning and ridden up and down
the hill and that is connectingand helps me ground myself.
Delbert (05:12):
Grounding.
Yeah.
Hess (05:13):
Then I had a paddle up the Elkhorn Creek with some friends,
and that wasn't too strenuousand that was beautiful, but
Delbert, when I got home, I wasexhausted and there was no
physical reason for me to beexhausted.
But just the chaos and the swirlof the news in my head, and it
(05:34):
was really tiring.
And I just, when I got home, Ilaid down and Leanne Morgan has
a new Netflix series I justfound out about, so I turned on
Leanne on, on Netflix and then Igot a text from a friend from
Louisville that his son's in atennis tournament up here in
Lexington, and he was gonna beplaying at five 30, a half an
(05:55):
hour away.
So I just jumped up and I went,and that was exactly what I
needed.
I saw friends that are close toour family, somebody that I
watched grow up who my dadmentored, and then I feel like
he's like a brother to me.
And then his only son has takenup tennis and it was so
beautiful to witness a.
(06:16):
These spectacular shots fromthis little 12-year-old who
spends five hours a day playing,and he loves it, and he is
disciplined and he is focusedand was an inspiration to me.
So in the swirl of the outsideworld, all of those things I had
on my mind.
Here's this youngster who'smaking a difference on something
that he loves.
So I didn't feel exhaustedanymore.
(06:37):
I felt refreshed, and it took meout of the chaos.
Delbert (06:41):
Something that helps us when we're in chaos is just to
be still for a moment.
Like just to lay down and bestill and get rejuvenated so you
can go on to the next bestthing, which is just what you
needed, I saw a lot of Catholicinfluencers on Instagram and saw
where a lot of young people fromall over the world had done a
(07:01):
pilgrimage to Rome and Pope Leostepped out, and St.
Peter Square and just said tothese young people, you are the
light of the world.
Hess (07:11):
Whoa.
Delbert (07:11):
Those are things just like seeing this young person.
Watch play tennis.
Those are things that give ushope, that, that fill our
hearts, that say yes.
Young people are the light ofthe world.
We need to take care of them.
It's one of the things that canground us and help us be still
(07:32):
be aware, but just focus on thethings that we can control.
Focus on what we can control andsometimes we just have to let go
of the things that are out ofour control.
It's part of the SerenityPrayer.
The prayer of St.
Francis says that, so you justfocus on what you can control.
(07:52):
And part of self-care is justwhat we do, Hess, we call each
other, we talk to each other.
We talk it out in our, work itout
Hess (08:02):
Our Sunday morning chats.
Delbert (08:04):
Sunday morning chats.
I had just a hectic work weekwith work where I hadn't been
off for a solid week and justhad a lot to do for my clients,
and I would just only catchsnippets of the news and would
catch, these starving childrenand babies in Gaza, which is
something super close to myheart with my family's charity,
(08:26):
Carol's Kitchen.
And I just couldn't stand it.
I couldn't even stand watchingit, and I just felt so
overwhelmed with grief, and feltjust so out of control and.
One of the things I didyesterday, I finally had my
first day off and I went toTurner's by the river and talked
(08:46):
to my high school friends thatare members with me.
We had a great time.
it was a beautiful day.
And then we went to, kingfish onthe river, and I said, I think
hush puppies and staring at theriver might be a form of
southern meditation.
I don't know.
But it gave me my bounce back,and I could come home and think
about Carol's kitchen.
(09:06):
What I've got planned for thisnew school year for the kids
here in Louisville, Kentucky,which is what I can control.
Hess (09:16):
So what I'm hearing you say, Delbert is that gave you
that rest and rejuvenation.
Delbert (09:20):
Right?
Hess (09:21):
You could come back and then you focus on something that
you can do.
Delbert (09:25):
Exactly.
Exactly.
And, when we're in chaos,really, the first thing is just
to do what Mamaw Dorothy said,be still focus on what you can
control, and then acknowledgeand accept, like I just said.
But the next thing, and we'vetalked so much in the past
couple weeks about, imaginingand then the possibilities of
(09:47):
our imagination and how to makeour dreams a reality.
Same thing, really, all thosetools apply really managing
chaos and managing your life.
Do stress reduction, which iswhat you and I both did
yesterday, reduce your stress.
Hess (10:06):
And then out of that imagination and then being able
to see possibility.
Delbert (10:11):
All those deep breaths you talk about are meditation
that we talk about.
I got to spread my gold lightreally far this morning because
I was more relaxed.
I was telling Hess, sometimeswhen I do my morning meditation
this week, I was like, oh, Ineed to remember here and I need
to remember there and all, Gaza,Israel, Iran, the Ukraine, our
(10:33):
own country.
Alligator Alcatraz.
Good
Hess (10:36):
Right.
Delbert (10:37):
All these things.
All these things that justdistract us and.
We don't even know.
There's so much, How we cancontrol it.
If you take those deep breathsand you meditate my gold light
spread like butter.
Like butter this morning.
Hess (10:53):
Sweet.
Sweet.
I love it.
Thanks, Bert.
Like when I'm driving my boatdown the road and it's a, it's,
I'm, it's pretty heavy and it'sbig and I only go 60 miles an
hour.
And when I look in my sidemirror and I see these big semis
coming up on me, I'll start toget tense and I'll start to feel
the swirl of chaos.
And if I take a deep breath inand release that activates the
(11:17):
vagus nerve, and then I relaxand the truck goes by.
So yeah, taking deep breaths, ithelps in the chaos.
Delbert something.
I do that.
This is just a depiction aboutsomething that's small that
takes me to a moment that givesme focus is the eyedrops that I
put in our Boston Terrier'seyes.
(11:38):
Tessa.
An eye because she, she had aretina detachment and had an eye
removed, so we have to give hereye drops three times a day in
this eye, and our alarms are setfor 7:00 AM 1:00 PM 7:00 PM.
And when that alarm goes off,put her on the top of the couch,
(11:59):
get the specific eye drop, tilther head up.
I'm watching this little tinyvile and I'm watching this
little drop.
I turn the vile and this littledrop comes out and lays right in
her eye and she blinks.
And just that minute focus likethat is calming and centering
for me.
So that's an aspect of themindfulness, a mindful practice
(12:23):
that I do.
Delbert (12:24):
exactly.
I do that with house cleaning'cause it makes me feel
connected to my mom.
Cleaning is almost like a littlemeditation for me.
Any kinda little chore that youcan gardening, you can get into
that just calms you Just makesyou hyper aware of something.
Outside the outside world.
(12:44):
Yeah.
Hess (12:45):
A, a mindful routine, just being mindful why you do that,
Delbert (12:49):
Yes,
Hess (12:51):
using the dawn, like you said, that your mom uses.
Delbert (12:54):
Yes, I hope our first sponsors Dawn Dish Washing
Liquid.
'cause I love it so much and mymom used it for everything and
now I use it for everything.
I even scrubbed my tub out withit because it's just, it just is
such a good cleaning product andthey, and I always think about
the little ducks and the littleanimals that get coated by the
(13:15):
oil spill.
They can wash'em off with dawn.
Because it cuts through oil andgrease and it makes their, and
then they run across the screenwith their little fluffy
feathers.
Okay, I digress.
Hess (13:26):
Yeah, a yoga practice.
Some people might
Delbert (13:29):
yoga is good.
Yes
Hess (13:32):
a class that can take you off the grid for an hour.
Delbert (13:35):
yes.
Pilates,
Hess (13:37):
Call a.
Delbert (13:39):
your friends.
Call your friends.
Call your family.
And focus on things that you cando.
And honestly, when you focus onthings, you can break'em down
into small, digestible items andthen prioritize on the things
that are really important inyour life.
(13:59):
Like I can prioritize feedingchildren in Jefferson County in
Louisville, Kentucky.
Hess (14:06):
Delbert as we're talking and you all, this is what the
Sunday morning conversationshave always done for me that
we've done over the past years,Delbert, and why we wanted to
give it out here to the worldthat.
Just being able to talk it outand talk with a friend.
It just really helps it absolveit because it doesn't do us any
(14:26):
good to stay in the chaos,
Delbert (14:29):
No.
Hess (14:29):
stay in that pen.
Pin pinwheel of spin.
It doesn't do anybody any good.
Delbert (14:36):
Yes.
as a country, I think that we'vegotta figure that out.
Listen to each other and get outof this sw that co confusion
swirl that can confusion pinwill.
Hess (14:48):
Delbert, you just said the word listen.
Even when you're talking withsomebody, being totally present
when you listen to that personis a mindful practice.
And so I pulled up this poemabout listening by my friend
Jane Gumple Can I read it?
Delbert (15:06):
Sure.
Hess (15:08):
All right, so well as Jane Gumple is an is an Imago
relationship therapist, Imagorelationship therapy guys is the
most wonderful relationship workthat you could do.
And it really teaches anintentional dialogue practice
where you really listen andcross the bridge to the other
person's world.
And when you listen, you mirrorand then you ask, is there more?
(15:30):
And then you mirror, you're notlistening to try to figure out
what you're gonna say next.
You're just really listening.
So that's the background aboutJane Gumple So here's her poem,
and the poem is titled, do IHave That Right?
It's a poem of sacred listening.
It's not a trick of language,not a therapist tool, not a step
(15:52):
to rush through on the way tobeing wise.
It's the opening of a gate, asoft knocking at the door of
another soul.
Do I have that right?
It's not just a question, it's abow.
It says, I have heard you.
(16:13):
I'm willing to be changed bywhat I've heard.
I will stay here long enough tohear it again.
In your words, it says, you arenot alone.
Inside this story, I havestepped in with you not to fix
or solve.
(16:33):
To witness.
Sometimes it is the first time aheart has been met without
defense, and in that stillness,healing begins for in this
sacred pause, this simple act ofasking.
We do not offer answers we offerLove Jane Gumple
Delbert (16:58):
Oh, that's beautiful.
Hess (17:00):
That's a centering thing that we can do whenever we're
listening or talking tosomebody, is it's just really
listening.
And then is there more and it'sbeautiful.
Delbert (17:13):
Love
Hess (17:13):
Yeah.
Yeah so it could be all sorts ofthings that you do.
The mindful practice of cleaningyour house, of putting an eye
drop in your dog's eyes justthere watching this little boy
hit this tennis ball, watchinghis concentration, hearing that
(17:34):
he practices five hours a day.
All the ways.
Delbert, you were talking aboutone of the little girls at your
schools that helps with the withthe kitchen with Carol's kitchen
or is it the back the foodpantry there where she helps,
she's in need of food and she'sgot this little sister that she
takes care of?
No, just this beautiful seeingsomeone really getting somebody.
Delbert (18:00):
I, I love that.
So many of our kids that help atour pantry also use the pantry
themselves.
They volunteer to set the foodout and and they are always, all
of'em, so mindful of what theiryounger siblings might need.
They'll pack a bag, oh, mylittle brother likes this.
My little sister likes that.
(18:21):
And I, it's such a beautifulthing that they're, they're
taking care of their family atsuch a young age, just still in
high school.
And I'll tell you, the quickestway to heal yourself is to take
care of somebody else.
Hess (18:36):
Yeah, for sure.
What's one small way that youcan take care of somebody else?
Absolutely.
That always can get us out ofour funk or out of the chaos for
sure.
Delbert (18:48):
It is,
Hess (18:49):
Love it.
Delbert (18:49):
do, has to have to do a little bit of housekeeping.
'cause I think last week I saidabout Governor Beshear's housing
initiative and I said billioninstead of million.
But he is got affordable housingincentives in Western and
eastern Kentucky.
But the budget is less than whatI said.
(19:10):
I wish it was a billion, but,it's 9.5 in Western Kentucky and
Warren County for affordablehousing.
And 223 million in EasternKentucky where they were hit by
the tornado.
But
Hess (19:25):
Wow.
Everything helps.
Helps.
Delbert (19:28):
yes.
Everything does help and tothink about people homeless and
struggling.
It makes me I was with myfriends, like I said at Turner's
and we were just saying,sometimes you just have to stop
and say, I'm really thankful forthese four walls and these
(19:50):
electricity and this plumbingwhen you see what's going on in
the world and even in our owncountry, in our own state.
Just to be thankful and withthat mindfulness.
To also stay focused on hope.
Hess (20:06):
Yeah,
Delbert (20:07):
that things are gonna get better.
I do
Hess (20:09):
sure.
Delbert (20:09):
that there's more good in the world.
I do believe that the youth ofour world are the light of the
world and our hope.
And, I'm gonna stay focused onhope.
I'm not gonna get caught in thatpinwheel of chaos.
I'm gonna try to be mindful andbe still like Mamaw Dorothy
says.
Hess (20:30):
And the signature on my email says this Delbert.
Where a student asked Butlerwhat the answer is to ending the
suffering in the world, shereplies, there's no single
answer that will solve all ofour future problems or all of
our problems.
There's no magic bullet.
Instead, there are thousands ofanswers at least, and you can be
(20:51):
one of them if you choose to be.
So just the small one thing thatyou can do just yourself, taking
yourself out of the chaos isgood for the world.
Delbert (21:00):
Yes, it totally is.
Hess (21:02):
What is one thing I can do for somebody else?
Where's somebody in need and howcan I show up?
And me showing up for thatlittle boy to be a witness and
see him and then eat dinner andsitting across.
And then for me to stand up andsay what I loved about how I saw
him swing his racket.
I he felt that he got feedback.
I was there, I was a witness tohim.
(21:25):
Yeah.
I love you and it always groundsme and centers me.
Think about if you're feelinglike you're in the chaotic
swirl, take care of yourself.
Be mindful.
Do one small thing to jump outof it and do one small thing for
somebody else.
You make a difference.
Delbert (21:47):
Stay focused on hope.
We love you friends.
Hess (21:51):
We love you.
You all take care, peace andlove.
Delbert (21:55):
Peace and love.
Popular Podcasts
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show
The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show. Clay Travis and Buck Sexton tackle the biggest stories in news, politics and current events with intelligence and humor. From the border crisis, to the madness of cancel culture and far-left missteps, Clay and Buck guide listeners through the latest headlines and hot topics with fun and entertaining conversations and opinions.