December 4, 2025 • 30 mins
Send Naihomy encouraging words!💕
We reflect on nine years of health change and name the five real sacrifices that make a wellness lifestyle stick. Comfort, identity, thoughts, time, and relationships all shift so results feel natural, not forced.
• leaving the comfort zone across food, movement, and public spaces
• allowing identity to evolve beyond old habits and social roles
• replacing unhelpful thoughts with flexible, portable beliefs
• reshaping the weekly schedule to protect sleep, training, and meals
• renegotiating social norms and invitations with clear boundaries
• using simple tools like portion checks without perfectionism
• anticipating discomfort so small steps feel safe and sustainable
• choosing progress over quick fixes and timelines
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (01:23):
Hello friends, welcome back to the podcast.
If you haven't noticed already,I am fighting a cold and a bit
nasally and congested.
So thank you for just writingwith me at this moment.
If I sneeze at some point duringthis podcast, just know that I'm
(01:45):
covering my mouth and I'm notsneezing straight into my
microphone.
Um but today I wanted to cover atopic that how should I say,
maybe is something you don'twant to hear, but is important
to hear.
And what I want to cover issacrifices that we need to do or
(02:07):
that we need to make on ourjourney in health and wellness
when we choose this specificlifestyle.
And I'm not talking about theusual, oh my god, I need to give
up my Oreos or I need to give upsoda.
Yes, those are sacrifices, but Iwant to go deeper than that, is
not just about getting rid of orhaving the restraint, right, or
(02:33):
the willpower.
If you talk about willpower alot or think that's about it, I
have a whole episode onwillpower that I can put in the
show notes, but it's it's somuch more than that when you are
not going after quick fixes,diet fads, challenges with a
(02:57):
timeline attached to it.
When you decide that you aredone with the fads and the
tactics and and the quick fixesand all this and all this back
and forth, then I think theseare the actual sacrifices that
happen in the beginning.
(03:17):
However, and and maybethroughout a specific, like not
such a temporary time frame,more of a long-term time frame,
that I feel like are not spokenabout at all.
And this came to me because inthe month of November, I hit
nine years in my health andwellness journey, and I always
(03:39):
like to do a podcast where Ireflect back on my journey as to
what I have learned and what Ican share for people who may be
having challenges adopting thislifestyle and incorporating it
in a way that's long term.
So instead of sharing my wholeentire story as to how I started
(04:01):
in 2016 after I gave birth to mysecond son, I didn't feel like
myself and really wanted to loseweight, ended up losing 50
pounds involuntarily.
That was never my goal.
It just happened as I adoptedmore of the lifestyle, as I
adopted more knowledge aroundfood, and as I remained more
(04:22):
consistent in the entireprocess.
This is what I feel were thesacrifices I had to make to get
to the place where I am today.
I'm gonna mention five of them,and we can go ahead and get
started.
So the first sacrifice thatremember we're going deep here
(04:47):
is not like oh I stopped havingmargaritas and at Dallas BBQ.
If you're from New York andyou're a millennial, you
probably know about Dallas BBQand their margaritas or pina
coladas.
Um, so the first one is comfortzone, okay, is sacrificing your
comfort zone because when you'restarting a lifestyle change and
(05:13):
when you need to take actiondifferent from what you've been
used to, you are going to haveto step outside of your comfort
zone, and that's across allaspects of wellness.
I'll give you some examples.
Maybe this is trying new foodsthat you've never tried before.
For me, that was tryingconsistently trying new
(05:34):
vegetables like green beans andBrussels sprouts, kale.
Oh my god, the first time I thefirst time I tried kale, I
thought I was a freaking horsebecause it was just not done
well.
So I had to step out of mycomfort zone with food, trying
new things.
(05:55):
In terms of food as well, I hadto think more about food and my
portions.
I had to think about how foodwas making me feel.
Was I eating too much, right?
Was I actually wanting somethingor not?
So it was outside of my comfortzone to think that much about
something and to make decisionsthat were not satisfying just
(06:20):
dopamine.
Like, let's say, for example,choosing a grilled chicken
sandwich instead of a friedchicken sandwich.
We know there's a difference, weknow there's a taste difference,
but I had goals, and just doingthose small or making those
small decisions, I feel like itis stepping outside of our
comfort zone.
Another example is exercise.
(06:41):
I was super uncomfortable goingto group classes or showing up
at the gym.
I thought I didn't know what Iwas doing, I always chose a spot
in the back of the class.
I was very self-conscious untilI noticed that no one was really
looking at me and nobody cared.
(07:01):
But still showing up in thatway, especially in smaller
communities where the membersalready know each other, they're
already looking very fit, theyhave these cute outfits on
because you best to know I wasnot showing up in cute outfits,
I was showing up in like capritights and oversized company
t-shirts because that's what Ihad, and that's what I was gonna
(07:24):
show up in.
So it required me to step out ofmy comfort zone.
Other things were going to sleepearlier and not staying up late
at night, um, making decisionsin front of other people is
definitely tied to our comfortzone.
So thinking that you're gonnamake a health and wellness
(07:48):
lifestyle change and not be outof your comfort zone
consistently within your ownself and mind and in front of
others is unrealistic to thinkthat you're gonna create a
lifestyle change withoutstepping outside of your comfort
zone.
What I can say is that as timegoes on and you continue to show
(08:10):
up, you create a new comfortzone, you expand upon that
circle that once was extremelyuncomfortable for you, and it
becomes a lot more comfortable,and you get to continue to push
the boundaries of your comfortzone as you challenge yourself
further in the journey.
(08:31):
However, you don't want to gotoo far out because then you
kind of freeze, right?
And it's scary and you want torevert all the way back.
So finding a little bit of that,you know, middle ground of being
uncomfortable, but not so muchso that you're gonna pass out of
embarrassment or something likethat, it is a good idea to keep
(08:55):
in mind.
I'll say that when we areengaging in quick fixes in
wellness when it's a temporarydiet, when it's a temporary time
frame, or something like that,people are a lot more accepting
of that answer, and it's not somuch out of the comfort zone
because it's so common and it'sso normalized that people
(09:19):
actually kind of cheer you on,and it's like, oh, you go, girl,
you have the willpower and youcan do it, and it's just 10 more
days, and it's just one month,and it's just this, right?
But when you're adopting thelifestyle, it's not just 30
days, just 10 days, or what haveyou.
(09:39):
To know that you are going tocommit to this for the rest of
your life is very intimidating,not just for us, but for people
around us.
So, knowing that ahead of time,I think it's useful.
With that being said, number twoof things that sacrifices we
(10:01):
need to make is our identity.
Our identity starts to shiftbecause the more we start
stepping outside of our comfortzone and trying these new
things, who you become isdifferent, and that is also a
sacrifice that we need to make.
The person who you knew and whoyou once was throughout 30
(10:23):
years, 35 years, however yourage is, is changing.
And that's scary to get to knowyourself at that level.
I, for example, I am no longerthe person who drinks just
because, who drinks because I'mbored, who drinks because
everybody else is doing it, whodrinks because there's nothing
else to do, so on and so forth.
(10:44):
That has been a huge identityshift for me, and people
question it all the time.
But I've made decisions, I knowwhy.
It's taken a very, very, verylong time, and I'm just
comfortable with that being partof my new identity.
My identity has become that I goto the gym two to three times a
(11:06):
week, and I try and not hang outlate on the weekends because I
know I need to get up early,unless it's for a special
occasion, but again, not thisjust because, because I feel
like it's almost self-sabotaginga little bit.
You start to become this person,and I think that people start to
(11:28):
question it because you probablyengaged in a lot of activities
before that are not similar, oryou start to make choices where
you're like, damn, I never didthis before, and you start to
get to know yourself in newways.
I know for me it really used toimpact me when I would go back,
(11:49):
especially like to restaurantsthat I would really enjoy, and I
would order foods that I used toreally love, and then they
didn't hit the same anymore.
And I would ask my hubs, right?
I was like, Did the recipechange?
Like, are they making thisdifferent?
And he's like, Nah, it's exactlythe same.
(12:10):
You've changed.
He used to tell me that all thetime, you've changed your taste
buds have changed because thisis exactly the same.
And I would ask, like, thewaiters and the bartenders, I'd
be like, is this different?
And they'd be like, No, it's thesame.
And that used to lead to a lotof disappointment because what I
had to do with my identity wasfind new things that the new me
(12:37):
really enjoyed and would give medopamine hits, and that took a
little while too to understandand find what those new things
were that would bring mepleasure, that would become my
regular restaurants to go to,that would become my go-to items
that I would buy at home, andthat would be fitting for my
(13:01):
life.
Another thing when it came toexercise was that I had to get
over my excuses when it came toshowing up because I would often
ask my trainers or tell myself,like, oh no, don't go.
Like people usually, whenthey're really tired, they don't
(13:22):
go.
Or if the weather is badoutside, then generally they
don't go.
But what I started to realizewas that the people who had
adopted this wellness identity,they would show up anyway.
And I realized, oh, if I wantthe results that they have, and
I want to really commit to this,then I need to move like them,
(13:46):
right?
I need to show up like them.
And it wasn't this comparison,it was more of curiosity and
analyzing, right?
Like, what were they doing andwhat was I doing, and what kind
of results I was getting, andwhat kind of results were they
getting, right?
So it was more of observingtheir identity and who they
(14:09):
knew, who they were.
And I was like, oh, if I wantthose kind of results, then I
have to show up at a similarway.
I can't expect and it's not fairto assume that I would get those
same results without showing upat some level, like some
capacity, right?
That would get me those results.
(14:32):
So shifting your identity andsacrificing the old version of
yourself for this new person whois committed to your health and
wellness is some sort of asacrifice because it's
uncomfortable.
Okay.
The third thing is from thingsyou have to kind of sacrifice in
(14:55):
this journey is your safethoughts and beliefs.
And I touched on that a littlebit with identity.
Okay.
So the beliefs about yourself,the beliefs of you know, things
you tell yourself.
There goes my calendar chime,the beliefs that you tell
(15:16):
yourself, um, and your thoughts,right?
So I started to realize and Iwould tell myself with
flexibility (15:23):
I am a person who works out twice a week.
I'm a person who works out threetimes a week, and that became
part of my new identity andthought process.
The way that that was gonnahappen usually varied, okay, and
it's what has held me overacross anything that comes up in
(15:43):
life because it gives me a lotof flexibility.
For example, when I go onvacation or extended vacations,
the thought I'm a person whoworks out twice a week or three
times a week comes with me.
So whether that's working out ina hotel room, in a hotel gym,
outside, I can still fulfillthat part of my identity.
(16:06):
When the pandemic happened, itwas the same thing.
I was used to going to the gymand getting my workouts there,
but of course that was off thetable.
So I figured out a way tocontinue to work out two times a
week, three times a week athome.
That was a big adjustment, butit just had to be done because
that's part of my identity.
(16:27):
That's what kept me sane a lotof the times in doing that at
home.
I adopted the belief I'm aperson who eats a vegetable with
my meals.
Now, does it happen 100% of thetime?
Usually not, but because Iadopted this belief and this
thought of what's my vegetablewith this meal, because I'm
(16:49):
great at picking a carb and aprotein, then it became easier
of like, oh, I'll incorporatethis cucumber or I'll
incorporate some caramelizedonions or some spinach or
whatever it is.
I was not used to thinking of avegetable forward mindset when
it came to my meals.
So adopting that belief andthose thoughts really helped me
(17:14):
along in the process because thethoughts that I had before were
not intentional, I'll say, andit was very tied to what other
people said and what I saw, andI noticed very quickly that I
had to think differently and Ihad to believe different things,
(17:36):
and I had to really know my whyin order for me to take the
action that I wanted to take.
Okay.
I hope that's making sensebecause it would be impossible
for me to get results if Icontinued with the beliefs of
I'm not picky, I eat anything,or whatever you want, or it's
(17:59):
cold outside, so I'm not goingto the gym.
You know, all these otherthoughts that are common out
there, I knew I had to get ridof them and adopt new ones
because they were not workingout for me.
It would become really hard forme to take action when those
were the things I was tellingmyself.
(18:19):
So again, I would identify howmany days I was working out, I
would identify how I would makemy meals, and I would make
adjustments.
I started measuring my food atone point because I noticed that
I was overeating consistently,especially with taking lunches
(18:42):
to work.
And I would be so full that Iwould be so uncomfortable, and I
would be dozing off at my desk,and I noticed that it was
because I was just eating toomuch, and I know that's
blasphemous to go ahead andmeasure your food.
At that time, I use littlemeasuring containers, and it's
(19:02):
been a really big debate anddiscussion with my clients when
it comes to measuring their foodwhen they need this sort of
support, but my thoughts andbeliefs had to change around
that as to why I was doing that,and it was just a tool that I
needed to help me in my journeybecause I had never learned how
(19:23):
to do that, and I wasconsistently overeating, and
never mind the fact that itmaybe did not help me lose
weight or anything like that.
I would feel so extremelyuncomfortable that I hated it,
and I wanted to avoid thatfeeling.
And if I overeat, then thatmeant that I couldn't have
(19:44):
another meal because I was justso uncomfortable, and I love to
eat, so I just rather haveanother meal.
So that is number three, reallyanalyzing the thoughts and the
beliefs that you want toidentify, and that's a lot of
the work that I do with myclients ahead of time because
then it really helps you thenmake aligned decisions and more
(20:05):
mindful decisions.
Okay, number four of things youmight have to sacrifice is your
schedule, and it's notnecessarily sacrificing it, but
it is shifting it andprioritizing certain things.
Like I mentioned before, goingto sleep earlier, making time
going to the gym, maybe makingtime to meal prep.
(20:25):
And again, this is not aboutbeing perfect, but knowing
what's a priority and learninghow to shift and prioritize
things during a week can besuper helpful.
So I don't know if there's a lotmore to say on the scheduling
piece, but it is finding thetime to incorporate all these
(20:47):
new things.
And usually when I start with anew client, this is a this is
oftentimes what we start withyour schedule, and where are we
going to fit these newactivities that you want to do
for this new lifestyle that youwant?
Because a lot of times we wantto pile it onto other things,
(21:10):
but that's not so useful becauseit adds more stress, it's
probably takes away from yourrest, and so on and so forth.
However, we always Always alwaysfind space for these things that
you want to do 100% all thetime, maybe not for everything
(21:32):
at once, but definitely for oneor two things that you can start
to incorporate into yourschedule that flows and it's not
a burden to you in a way thatmakes sense.
So definitely your schedule issomething to adjust.
And number five, and the lastthing that sometimes gets
(21:53):
sacrificed when we are adoptinga new lifestyle is
relationships.
As I mentioned in the beginning,or towards the beginning, I
became this person, again, inbecoming in comfort zone, who I
really wanted to prioritize myexercise.
I really wanted to prioritizecertain foods that I wanted to
(22:16):
eat versus others or my sleep,what have you, because I knew I
didn't want to be too exhausted.
And the reason why I was stayingup was not so valuable to me as
other things.
So sometimes when certainwhatever relationship it might
be, family, friends, orwhatever, they continue on the
(22:39):
lifestyle that you had before orthat you guys have shared for a
very long time, and then youstart making these changes.
Sometimes people come along withyou and they support you, and
other times they don't.
And it sucks, or you all of asudden don't have a bunch of
things in common because younoticed that the only thing you
(23:01):
had in common for a very longtime was going out to grab
drinks, or was going out late atnight to grab Chinese food or
pizza or certain things likethat.
And when you invite, right?
Because I always encourage thiswhen you invite your other
person, whoever they might be,to your new lifestyle, maybe
(23:24):
that's going for a walk or goingfor a hike or going for a new
exercise class or tryingdifferent foods at a restaurant,
they're not as open to it, whichis okay.
I just want to mention thateverybody's journey looks
different, everybody's capacityis different, everybody's why is
different, right?
I've had great success with myclients and their friends giving
(23:47):
it a shot, right?
And supporting andparticipating, and with great
success.
I've had a lot of my clientsteach and expand the wellness of
loved ones, whether that'sfriends, family members,
parents, what have you.
And other times is not asaligned, and that's okay.
(24:07):
Maybe that's finding new ways ofhanging out, maybe that's being
totally okay with each of youhaving a different style,
whatever that might be.
But I just want to say thatmaybe it's not a total loss of
relationships, but it'sdefinitely a change.
I know I had a client who becamemore vulnerable with her friends
(24:29):
and shared what she wanted toeat versus not because they
would always go hang outtogether, and she had certain
eating restrictions because itreally would hurt her, her
stomach and her digestivesystem.
So, but one thing that her andher friends would do often was
go out and have drinks and havespecific kinds of foods that
(24:51):
would really hurt my client, andshe would spend days and days
and days trying to recover fromthat one dinner, and that's
absolutely not fair to her,right?
So she had vulnerableconversations with her friends
about where she was and what sheneeded and how she was gonna
(25:12):
participate in these outings,and her friends were totally
accepting, validating,encouraging, and supportive of
her.
But again, it's going back tothat comfort zone and identity
shifts thing, right?
And the beliefs of what herfriends were gonna say and what
they were gonna think if she didshare.
(25:33):
So, as you can see in thatexample, it was kind of all
looped into one as to how all ofthese different aspects of
almost sacrifice in your healthand wellness journey gets pieced
together because it's not justone thing over the other.
And when you're creating andyou're intentional, but
intentional about a lifestyle,instead of it being one-off
(25:57):
situations or situations with atimeline, when you're really
invested in how you feel, yourhealth, your strength, your
longevity, all of these things,then understanding that there's
going to be changes andadaptations in these five areas,
which are comfort zone,identity, your thoughts and
(26:20):
beliefs, your schedule, and yourrelationships is very, very
important.
These are things I did not knowahead of time in my nine years
of health and wellness journey,is just really a reflective
piece of what when I thoughtabout it deeper, like what was
(26:41):
it?
What is it that actually neededto shift aside from oh, I'm not
gonna eat this dessert.
I think these were the ones thatstood out for me the most.
And I feel like when you hearsomebody talk about this, right?
And when you know to anticipateit at some degree, then it's not
(27:06):
is not coming at you so offguard.
And that's a lot of what Isupport my clients with is this
anticipatory understanding, isthis making these changes feel
safe, making these changesvalid, and understanding how to
navigate them because there'sreally no way to avoid them, is
(27:28):
more of how do we navigate it,how do we feel safe in them, how
do we accelerate or pull backfrom how fast we're making these
changes or incorporating thesethings into our life because
again, it's not like fullthrottle on everything.
Sometimes we have to take it onestep at a time, one day at a
(27:50):
time, and it does start to sinkin, it does start to integrate,
it does start to feel so so sogood.
And the best part is that itstarts to feel natural.
And so many of my clients arelike, Oh my gosh, I lost weight
and I felt like I didn't doanything, which is the best
part.
They're like, I feel like Ididn't even really do that much,
(28:13):
and I'm getting all these greatresults, and this is why because
we walk through these things isnot forceful and is not beating
yourself up and punishingyourself, is really walking
through these zones togetherthat gets the best result
without feeling like you'refighting for your life every
(28:37):
single day when you're trying todo a health and wellness
lifestyle, which I see all thetime.
And I'm like, babe, you reallydon't have to torture yourself
like that to get the resultsthat you want.
However, no one is out herereally explaining what that
looks like and what the changesneed to be so that you don't
feel like you need to tortureyourself because that's usually
(28:58):
what we're taught.
So I hope this was helpful.
Let's keep the conversationgoing.
Please reach out if this hashelped you in some way.
As always, please rate thepodcast, leave a review, share
with your friends, share onsocial media, and please feel
(29:20):
free to tag me.
If you are like, dang, I needsupport in these areas.
I think that this is a big partof what has been missing every
single time I try to make healthand wellness changes in my life.
Then I invite you to go aheadand send me a DM, an email, book
(29:44):
a free consultation call so wecan talk more about this and set
you up with health and hormonecoaching with me so I can
support you along the way.
As I've done with all of mybeautiful clients.
So I hope y'all have a greatweek and I will see y'all next
time.
Bye.
Hello friends, welcome back to the podcast.
If you haven't noticed already,I am fighting a cold and a bit
nasally and congested.
So thank you for just writingwith me at this moment.
If I sneeze at some point duringthis podcast, just know that I'm
(01:45):
covering my mouth and I'm notsneezing straight into my
microphone.
Um but today I wanted to cover atopic that how should I say,
maybe is something you don'twant to hear, but is important
to hear.
And what I want to cover issacrifices that we need to do or
(02:07):
that we need to make on ourjourney in health and wellness
when we choose this specificlifestyle.
And I'm not talking about theusual, oh my god, I need to give
up my Oreos or I need to give upsoda.
Yes, those are sacrifices, but Iwant to go deeper than that, is
not just about getting rid of orhaving the restraint, right, or
(02:33):
the willpower.
If you talk about willpower alot or think that's about it, I
have a whole episode onwillpower that I can put in the
show notes, but it's it's somuch more than that when you are
not going after quick fixes,diet fads, challenges with a
(02:57):
timeline attached to it.
When you decide that you aredone with the fads and the
tactics and and the quick fixesand all this and all this back
and forth, then I think theseare the actual sacrifices that
happen in the beginning.
(03:17):
However, and and maybethroughout a specific, like not
such a temporary time frame,more of a long-term time frame,
that I feel like are not spokenabout at all.
And this came to me because inthe month of November, I hit
nine years in my health andwellness journey, and I always
(03:39):
like to do a podcast where Ireflect back on my journey as to
what I have learned and what Ican share for people who may be
having challenges adopting thislifestyle and incorporating it
in a way that's long term.
So instead of sharing my wholeentire story as to how I started
(04:01):
in 2016 after I gave birth to mysecond son, I didn't feel like
myself and really wanted to loseweight, ended up losing 50
pounds involuntarily.
That was never my goal.
It just happened as I adoptedmore of the lifestyle, as I
adopted more knowledge aroundfood, and as I remained more
(04:22):
consistent in the entireprocess.
This is what I feel were thesacrifices I had to make to get
to the place where I am today.
I'm gonna mention five of them,and we can go ahead and get
started.
So the first sacrifice thatremember we're going deep here
(04:47):
is not like oh I stopped havingmargaritas and at Dallas BBQ.
If you're from New York andyou're a millennial, you
probably know about Dallas BBQand their margaritas or pina
coladas.
Um, so the first one is comfortzone, okay, is sacrificing your
comfort zone because when you'restarting a lifestyle change and
(05:13):
when you need to take actiondifferent from what you've been
used to, you are going to haveto step outside of your comfort
zone, and that's across allaspects of wellness.
I'll give you some examples.
Maybe this is trying new foodsthat you've never tried before.
For me, that was tryingconsistently trying new
(05:34):
vegetables like green beans andBrussels sprouts, kale.
Oh my god, the first time I thefirst time I tried kale, I
thought I was a freaking horsebecause it was just not done
well.
So I had to step out of mycomfort zone with food, trying
new things.
(05:55):
In terms of food as well, I hadto think more about food and my
portions.
I had to think about how foodwas making me feel.
Was I eating too much, right?
Was I actually wanting somethingor not?
So it was outside of my comfortzone to think that much about
something and to make decisionsthat were not satisfying just
(06:20):
dopamine.
Like, let's say, for example,choosing a grilled chicken
sandwich instead of a friedchicken sandwich.
We know there's a difference, weknow there's a taste difference,
but I had goals, and just doingthose small or making those
small decisions, I feel like itis stepping outside of our
comfort zone.
Another example is exercise.
(06:41):
I was super uncomfortable goingto group classes or showing up
at the gym.
I thought I didn't know what Iwas doing, I always chose a spot
in the back of the class.
I was very self-conscious untilI noticed that no one was really
looking at me and nobody cared.
(07:01):
But still showing up in thatway, especially in smaller
communities where the membersalready know each other, they're
already looking very fit, theyhave these cute outfits on
because you best to know I wasnot showing up in cute outfits,
I was showing up in like capritights and oversized company
t-shirts because that's what Ihad, and that's what I was gonna
(07:24):
show up in.
So it required me to step out ofmy comfort zone.
Other things were going to sleepearlier and not staying up late
at night, um, making decisionsin front of other people is
definitely tied to our comfortzone.
So thinking that you're gonnamake a health and wellness
(07:48):
lifestyle change and not be outof your comfort zone
consistently within your ownself and mind and in front of
others is unrealistic to thinkthat you're gonna create a
lifestyle change withoutstepping outside of your comfort
zone.
What I can say is that as timegoes on and you continue to show
(08:10):
up, you create a new comfortzone, you expand upon that
circle that once was extremelyuncomfortable for you, and it
becomes a lot more comfortable,and you get to continue to push
the boundaries of your comfortzone as you challenge yourself
further in the journey.
(08:31):
However, you don't want to gotoo far out because then you
kind of freeze, right?
And it's scary and you want torevert all the way back.
So finding a little bit of that,you know, middle ground of being
uncomfortable, but not so muchso that you're gonna pass out of
embarrassment or something likethat, it is a good idea to keep
(08:55):
in mind.
I'll say that when we areengaging in quick fixes in
wellness when it's a temporarydiet, when it's a temporary time
frame, or something like that,people are a lot more accepting
of that answer, and it's not somuch out of the comfort zone
because it's so common and it'sso normalized that people
(09:19):
actually kind of cheer you on,and it's like, oh, you go, girl,
you have the willpower and youcan do it, and it's just 10 more
days, and it's just one month,and it's just this, right?
But when you're adopting thelifestyle, it's not just 30
days, just 10 days, or what haveyou.
(09:39):
To know that you are going tocommit to this for the rest of
your life is very intimidating,not just for us, but for people
around us.
So, knowing that ahead of time,I think it's useful.
With that being said, number twoof things that sacrifices we
(10:01):
need to make is our identity.
Our identity starts to shiftbecause the more we start
stepping outside of our comfortzone and trying these new
things, who you become isdifferent, and that is also a
sacrifice that we need to make.
The person who you knew and whoyou once was throughout 30
(10:23):
years, 35 years, however yourage is, is changing.
And that's scary to get to knowyourself at that level.
I, for example, I am no longerthe person who drinks just
because, who drinks because I'mbored, who drinks because
everybody else is doing it, whodrinks because there's nothing
else to do, so on and so forth.
(10:44):
That has been a huge identityshift for me, and people
question it all the time.
But I've made decisions, I knowwhy.
It's taken a very, very, verylong time, and I'm just
comfortable with that being partof my new identity.
My identity has become that I goto the gym two to three times a
(11:06):
week, and I try and not hang outlate on the weekends because I
know I need to get up early,unless it's for a special
occasion, but again, not thisjust because, because I feel
like it's almost self-sabotaginga little bit.
You start to become this person,and I think that people start to
(11:28):
question it because you probablyengaged in a lot of activities
before that are not similar, oryou start to make choices where
you're like, damn, I never didthis before, and you start to
get to know yourself in newways.
I know for me it really used toimpact me when I would go back,
(11:49):
especially like to restaurantsthat I would really enjoy, and I
would order foods that I used toreally love, and then they
didn't hit the same anymore.
And I would ask my hubs, right?
I was like, Did the recipechange?
Like, are they making thisdifferent?
And he's like, Nah, it's exactlythe same.
(12:10):
You've changed.
He used to tell me that all thetime, you've changed your taste
buds have changed because thisis exactly the same.
And I would ask, like, thewaiters and the bartenders, I'd
be like, is this different?
And they'd be like, No, it's thesame.
And that used to lead to a lotof disappointment because what I
had to do with my identity wasfind new things that the new me
(12:37):
really enjoyed and would give medopamine hits, and that took a
little while too to understandand find what those new things
were that would bring mepleasure, that would become my
regular restaurants to go to,that would become my go-to items
that I would buy at home, andthat would be fitting for my
(13:01):
life.
Another thing when it came toexercise was that I had to get
over my excuses when it came toshowing up because I would often
ask my trainers or tell myself,like, oh no, don't go.
Like people usually, whenthey're really tired, they don't
(13:22):
go.
Or if the weather is badoutside, then generally they
don't go.
But what I started to realizewas that the people who had
adopted this wellness identity,they would show up anyway.
And I realized, oh, if I wantthe results that they have, and
I want to really commit to this,then I need to move like them,
(13:46):
right?
I need to show up like them.
And it wasn't this comparison,it was more of curiosity and
analyzing, right?
Like, what were they doing andwhat was I doing, and what kind
of results I was getting, andwhat kind of results were they
getting, right?
So it was more of observingtheir identity and who they
(14:09):
knew, who they were.
And I was like, oh, if I wantthose kind of results, then I
have to show up at a similarway.
I can't expect and it's not fairto assume that I would get those
same results without showing upat some level, like some
capacity, right?
That would get me those results.
(14:32):
So shifting your identity andsacrificing the old version of
yourself for this new person whois committed to your health and
wellness is some sort of asacrifice because it's
uncomfortable.
Okay.
The third thing is from thingsyou have to kind of sacrifice in
(14:55):
this journey is your safethoughts and beliefs.
And I touched on that a littlebit with identity.
Okay.
So the beliefs about yourself,the beliefs of you know, things
you tell yourself.
There goes my calendar chime,the beliefs that you tell
(15:16):
yourself, um, and your thoughts,right?
So I started to realize and Iwould tell myself with
flexibility (15:23):
I am a person who works out twice a week.
I'm a person who works out threetimes a week, and that became
part of my new identity andthought process.
The way that that was gonnahappen usually varied, okay, and
it's what has held me overacross anything that comes up in
(15:43):
life because it gives me a lotof flexibility.
For example, when I go onvacation or extended vacations,
the thought I'm a person whoworks out twice a week or three
times a week comes with me.
So whether that's working out ina hotel room, in a hotel gym,
outside, I can still fulfillthat part of my identity.
(16:06):
When the pandemic happened, itwas the same thing.
I was used to going to the gymand getting my workouts there,
but of course that was off thetable.
So I figured out a way tocontinue to work out two times a
week, three times a week athome.
That was a big adjustment, butit just had to be done because
that's part of my identity.
(16:27):
That's what kept me sane a lotof the times in doing that at
home.
I adopted the belief I'm aperson who eats a vegetable with
my meals.
Now, does it happen 100% of thetime?
Usually not, but because Iadopted this belief and this
thought of what's my vegetablewith this meal, because I'm
(16:49):
great at picking a carb and aprotein, then it became easier
of like, oh, I'll incorporatethis cucumber or I'll
incorporate some caramelizedonions or some spinach or
whatever it is.
I was not used to thinking of avegetable forward mindset when
it came to my meals.
So adopting that belief andthose thoughts really helped me
(17:14):
along in the process because thethoughts that I had before were
not intentional, I'll say, andit was very tied to what other
people said and what I saw, andI noticed very quickly that I
had to think differently and Ihad to believe different things,
(17:36):
and I had to really know my whyin order for me to take the
action that I wanted to take.
Okay.
I hope that's making sensebecause it would be impossible
for me to get results if Icontinued with the beliefs of
I'm not picky, I eat anything,or whatever you want, or it's
(17:59):
cold outside, so I'm not goingto the gym.
You know, all these otherthoughts that are common out
there, I knew I had to get ridof them and adopt new ones
because they were not workingout for me.
It would become really hard forme to take action when those
were the things I was tellingmyself.
(18:19):
So again, I would identify howmany days I was working out, I
would identify how I would makemy meals, and I would make
adjustments.
I started measuring my food atone point because I noticed that
I was overeating consistently,especially with taking lunches
(18:42):
to work.
And I would be so full that Iwould be so uncomfortable, and I
would be dozing off at my desk,and I noticed that it was
because I was just eating toomuch, and I know that's
blasphemous to go ahead andmeasure your food.
At that time, I use littlemeasuring containers, and it's
(19:02):
been a really big debate anddiscussion with my clients when
it comes to measuring their foodwhen they need this sort of
support, but my thoughts andbeliefs had to change around
that as to why I was doing that,and it was just a tool that I
needed to help me in my journeybecause I had never learned how
(19:23):
to do that, and I wasconsistently overeating, and
never mind the fact that itmaybe did not help me lose
weight or anything like that.
I would feel so extremelyuncomfortable that I hated it,
and I wanted to avoid thatfeeling.
And if I overeat, then thatmeant that I couldn't have
(19:44):
another meal because I was justso uncomfortable, and I love to
eat, so I just rather haveanother meal.
So that is number three, reallyanalyzing the thoughts and the
beliefs that you want toidentify, and that's a lot of
the work that I do with myclients ahead of time because
then it really helps you thenmake aligned decisions and more
(20:05):
mindful decisions.
Okay, number four of things youmight have to sacrifice is your
schedule, and it's notnecessarily sacrificing it, but
it is shifting it andprioritizing certain things.
Like I mentioned before, goingto sleep earlier, making time
going to the gym, maybe makingtime to meal prep.
(20:25):
And again, this is not aboutbeing perfect, but knowing
what's a priority and learninghow to shift and prioritize
things during a week can besuper helpful.
So I don't know if there's a lotmore to say on the scheduling
piece, but it is finding thetime to incorporate all these
(20:47):
new things.
And usually when I start with anew client, this is a this is
oftentimes what we start withyour schedule, and where are we
going to fit these newactivities that you want to do
for this new lifestyle that youwant?
Because a lot of times we wantto pile it onto other things,
(21:10):
but that's not so useful becauseit adds more stress, it's
probably takes away from yourrest, and so on and so forth.
However, we always Always alwaysfind space for these things that
you want to do 100% all thetime, maybe not for everything
(21:32):
at once, but definitely for oneor two things that you can start
to incorporate into yourschedule that flows and it's not
a burden to you in a way thatmakes sense.
So definitely your schedule issomething to adjust.
And number five, and the lastthing that sometimes gets
(21:53):
sacrificed when we are adoptinga new lifestyle is
relationships.
As I mentioned in the beginning,or towards the beginning, I
became this person, again, inbecoming in comfort zone, who I
really wanted to prioritize myexercise.
I really wanted to prioritizecertain foods that I wanted to
(22:16):
eat versus others or my sleep,what have you, because I knew I
didn't want to be too exhausted.
And the reason why I was stayingup was not so valuable to me as
other things.
So sometimes when certainwhatever relationship it might
be, family, friends, orwhatever, they continue on the
(22:39):
lifestyle that you had before orthat you guys have shared for a
very long time, and then youstart making these changes.
Sometimes people come along withyou and they support you, and
other times they don't.
And it sucks, or you all of asudden don't have a bunch of
things in common because younoticed that the only thing you
(23:01):
had in common for a very longtime was going out to grab
drinks, or was going out late atnight to grab Chinese food or
pizza or certain things likethat.
And when you invite, right?
Because I always encourage thiswhen you invite your other
person, whoever they might be,to your new lifestyle, maybe
(23:24):
that's going for a walk or goingfor a hike or going for a new
exercise class or tryingdifferent foods at a restaurant,
they're not as open to it, whichis okay.
I just want to mention thateverybody's journey looks
different, everybody's capacityis different, everybody's why is
different, right?
I've had great success with myclients and their friends giving
(23:47):
it a shot, right?
And supporting andparticipating, and with great
success.
I've had a lot of my clientsteach and expand the wellness of
loved ones, whether that'sfriends, family members,
parents, what have you.
And other times is not asaligned, and that's okay.
(24:07):
Maybe that's finding new ways ofhanging out, maybe that's being
totally okay with each of youhaving a different style,
whatever that might be.
But I just want to say thatmaybe it's not a total loss of
relationships, but it'sdefinitely a change.
I know I had a client who becamemore vulnerable with her friends
(24:29):
and shared what she wanted toeat versus not because they
would always go hang outtogether, and she had certain
eating restrictions because itreally would hurt her, her
stomach and her digestivesystem.
So, but one thing that her andher friends would do often was
go out and have drinks and havespecific kinds of foods that
(24:51):
would really hurt my client, andshe would spend days and days
and days trying to recover fromthat one dinner, and that's
absolutely not fair to her,right?
So she had vulnerableconversations with her friends
about where she was and what sheneeded and how she was gonna
(25:12):
participate in these outings,and her friends were totally
accepting, validating,encouraging, and supportive of
her.
But again, it's going back tothat comfort zone and identity
shifts thing, right?
And the beliefs of what herfriends were gonna say and what
they were gonna think if she didshare.
(25:33):
So, as you can see in thatexample, it was kind of all
looped into one as to how all ofthese different aspects of
almost sacrifice in your healthand wellness journey gets pieced
together because it's not justone thing over the other.
And when you're creating andyou're intentional, but
intentional about a lifestyle,instead of it being one-off
(25:57):
situations or situations with atimeline, when you're really
invested in how you feel, yourhealth, your strength, your
longevity, all of these things,then understanding that there's
going to be changes andadaptations in these five areas,
which are comfort zone,identity, your thoughts and
(26:20):
beliefs, your schedule, and yourrelationships is very, very
important.
These are things I did not knowahead of time in my nine years
of health and wellness journey,is just really a reflective
piece of what when I thoughtabout it deeper, like what was
(26:41):
it?
What is it that actually neededto shift aside from oh, I'm not
gonna eat this dessert.
I think these were the ones thatstood out for me the most.
And I feel like when you hearsomebody talk about this, right?
And when you know to anticipateit at some degree, then it's not
(27:06):
is not coming at you so offguard.
And that's a lot of what Isupport my clients with is this
anticipatory understanding, isthis making these changes feel
safe, making these changesvalid, and understanding how to
navigate them because there'sreally no way to avoid them, is
(27:28):
more of how do we navigate it,how do we feel safe in them, how
do we accelerate or pull backfrom how fast we're making these
changes or incorporating thesethings into our life because
again, it's not like fullthrottle on everything.
Sometimes we have to take it onestep at a time, one day at a
(27:50):
time, and it does start to sinkin, it does start to integrate,
it does start to feel so so sogood.
And the best part is that itstarts to feel natural.
And so many of my clients arelike, Oh my gosh, I lost weight
and I felt like I didn't doanything, which is the best
part.
They're like, I feel like Ididn't even really do that much,
(28:13):
and I'm getting all these greatresults, and this is why because
we walk through these things isnot forceful and is not beating
yourself up and punishingyourself, is really walking
through these zones togetherthat gets the best result
without feeling like you'refighting for your life every
(28:37):
single day when you're trying todo a health and wellness
lifestyle, which I see all thetime.
And I'm like, babe, you reallydon't have to torture yourself
like that to get the resultsthat you want.
However, no one is out herereally explaining what that
looks like and what the changesneed to be so that you don't
feel like you need to tortureyourself because that's usually
(28:58):
what we're taught.
So I hope this was helpful.
Let's keep the conversationgoing.
Please reach out if this hashelped you in some way.
As always, please rate thepodcast, leave a review, share
with your friends, share onsocial media, and please feel
(29:20):
free to tag me.
If you are like, dang, I needsupport in these areas.
I think that this is a big partof what has been missing every
single time I try to make healthand wellness changes in my life.
Then I invite you to go aheadand send me a DM, an email, book
(29:44):
a free consultation call so wecan talk more about this and set
you up with health and hormonecoaching with me so I can
support you along the way.
As I've done with all of mybeautiful clients.
So I hope y'all have a greatweek and I will see y'all next
time.
Bye.
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