January 29, 2025 • 44 mins
You might have been listening to this podcast this past month and wondered...hmmm who ARE these people?? WELL gather 'round, as we tell you the Matt & Omar lore you've been wondering about.
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Let's Dig In: @letsdigin.podcast
Matt Benfield: @mr.benfield
Omar Ahmed: @omarahmed.co
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Can you believe we've beentogether for almost eight years?
(00:03):
I cannot.
And do you know why?
I cannot believe it because youfucking insufferable.
Hey.
This is crazy work.
It's almost a decade.
Raisy work.
I think gay is that's like 5billion years.
That's what I like dinosaurs.
Like I try Sarah tops.
You wouldn't be a triceratops.
I would be a stegosaurus.
(00:24):
No, the big long neck ones, likethe cutesy, like golden
retrievers of the dinosaurs.
The ones with the long necks.
The big tall ones.
I don't know.
I only know the names of thedinosaurs from power ranges.
I think it's a.
Triceratops.
The saber tooth tiger.
I don't know.
I don't think they existed inthe same.
Era, no savers is hacker.
No, no, no.
They were no fries.
(00:44):
By the power and just hard whatwas it?
The Tara dactyl is that theflying one?
Pink power ranger and then thefucking yellow ranger was the,
saber tooth tiger.
I mean, I don't think it was.
Okay.
Alright.
Oh, so did like Oxy.
All of them are dead.
Hi.
Hello.
Welcome back to another episodeof let's dig in.
(01:08):
you, You took it too far.
You started it.
Oh, come on.
You.
That wretched.
Welcome back to let's.
Dig in.
This is a podcast.
So we like to sit around thedinner table and talk shit.
Yeah.
To join us and to talk shit.
Well, Listen to us talk shit.
You can't really talk becauseyou're not on the podcast, but
we are, so you have to listen tous.
(01:29):
I kind of would like it.
If you did also talk to yourselfor respond in your own way.
Yeah.
To yourself, maybe.
In private, not in publicbecause then people will think
you're weird.
Do we one fuck.
We thought today would be a goodat time to introduce you to more
of us.
Yeah.
I'm like, this is what episodefour now.
Yeah.
What the fuck were we doing?
(01:50):
I'm like, Hey, you're like, whothe fuck are you?
why am I just listening to you?
Ramble on about.
British versus American bullshitand your random like ins and
outs because we're entertaining.
We are so entertaining.
So entertaining.
We were like, here we are in ourliving room, just like talking
shit around the dinner table.
Yeah, this is an hour.
Actually this dinner table.
(02:11):
If you're watching on YouTube.
This table is our little patiofurniture that we bring.
In from outside because it's theonly table that makes sense to
do this.
We do have an eight C or let'sjust tube noxious.
We have an eight Cedar diningtable.
Around that.
The two of us just being like,hello.
Yeah.
We are.
Yeah, it'd be funny.
We wanted to tell you about howwe met and our relationship, the
(02:34):
Yan.
I told you I was in jail everysingle time.
Without further ado.
Here is our meat.
Cute.
Let's dig in.
Why did we meet.
We met in Berlin.
Which is crazy.
Crazy.
I'm from North Carolina.
He's from the UK.
We met in Berlin internationalrum.
(02:57):
Come meet acute.
Which is kind of crazy becauseyou studied international
relations at university andyou've ever used that degree in
your entire life apart fromgetting an international
relationship.
Nope.
I paid$30,000 to marry a Britishman.
Yeah, you're both fantastic.
You're welcome.
Okay, you're welcome.
Thank you, your welcome for thegreen card.
Yeah, you're right.
(03:18):
You're welcome for the constantentertainment and endless.
Projects and career venturesthat we have been able to, Oh
right there.
The thoughts, right there manywords in my brain, I'm telling
you, there are so many words,but then none of them come out
and it annoys me.
Does that happen to you?
No.
My thoughts are prettystreamlined.
No mine on.
It's it's literally like,Grabbing smoke.
(03:40):
You are a Gemini.
So Berlin, how did we both getto Berlin in the first place?
I moved to Berlin.
Cause I was like, let's move tothe place where I can be like an
absolutely insane person for alittle while The only reason I
moved to Berlin because I waslike, Hmm.
Where can I go where I can beabsolutely deranged without any
consequences?
What year did you do this?
(04:01):
This was 20 16, 20 16.
Back let's back it up.
Let's go back to the beginning.
If you didn't already know, Igrew up in the UK and then I
moved from, the UK to Australiaafter I graduated university.
Cause I was like, fuck thisplace.
Yeah.
So, Sorry.
It's just like a little bit sadand boring as we discussed on
the previous episode.
(04:22):
Lots of ex about the UK.
Love it.
I love it.
I love.
I love to visit.
I do love to visit.
But I really don't think I canever live there again.
I don't know why.
I just like the world is theworld is gigantic and the United
Kingdom is just a tiny cluster.
Fuck of islands.
Don't need to live on a teenytiny island.
No.
And so.
I set sail to the winds, thewinds beneath my sales and the
(04:44):
sales beneath my above my.
Boat.
My airplane wing my vessel.
Yeah.
Fucking flew to Melbourne andmoved to Melbourne Australia.
When I was 22 years old.
Kind of full year of just eat,pray, loving the shower myself.
And then I.
Gotcha.
Australia.
I traveled Asia and I was like,wow, this is amazing.
I'm so cool.
(05:04):
My life is amazing.
And then I met like a bunch ofGerman people and I was like,
you're really fun.
You're like leave.
You're like, no, but you're sofun.
And I've been saying this youlike so fun.
And then I eventually moved tothere's a slight kerfuffle
involved in between.
I moved back to the UK for halfa second.
And then I met a boy who was apiece of shit.
(05:25):
Who's really good looking, buthe had the personality of a
boiled ag.
Yeah.
And I was like, oh my God.
What's that movie, do you know?
It's hard to be single.
It's a rebel Wilson and oh yeah.
Stupid bomb.
And they like talk about beingstuck in someone's Dick sound.
You like Dick's hand DickCassandra.
And when you're stuck insomeone's Dick sand, Dick sand.
(05:48):
Now you say it sounds reallydisgusting.
And it's like quick sound, butlike, it's Like you were stuck
into in that person's DickSanders.
And the orbit.
Yeah.
Don't want to be there orknowing as far.
Like they're a boy.
It's hot.
His heart he's high.
Oh, my God, you've got so manyarms and I'm like, is there
anything beyond that surface?
Not really.
And it took me a long time tofigure that out.
(06:09):
Anyway.
Fuck you.
Move to Berlin.
And was like, let me go and findmyself again because, oh, that
was a side quest.
I did not want to participatein.
You hideous.
And it was that for Bit toolong.
Eventually I found myself inBerlin, Germany.
Deutschland.
No anyone apart from one randomperson, I was like in a
(06:30):
backpackers hostel withinAustralia.
Yeah.
And.
then I, he introduced me to oneof his girlfriends who was from
the UK.
And then she had a bunch of likeBritish friends.
And then we just form this likehuge friendship group.
And I just pied like crazyperson.
that's what got me to Berlin.
I know we'll get to it.
We'll get to like how we metafterwards.
That's chapter one where we'rein our own chapter.
(06:52):
One's just starting my book now.
Yeah.
Welcome.
It's a better book.
I'm kidding.
You're actually, your story isway more exciting than mine.
Go on you.
Please.
Tell me more about this weirdorganization that you're a POV
shot.
Ah, I graduated.
College.
How's we call it.
Shut the fuck.
I graduated college in 2016.
(07:15):
From Appalachian stateuniversity.
16.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
Yeah, because I'm two yearsyounger than you.
Oh, yeah.
Oh yeah.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
I graduated in 2014.
I graduated university in 2016from Appalachia state university
in Boone, North Carolina.
With not a thought in my headabout what I wanted to do with
the rest of my life.
So I, while I was studyinginternational relations, Global
(07:36):
studies, which was a horrible,horrible decision that led me
into mountains of debt for noreason.
I can't do anything with that.
With the green, what.
What the fuck did you think youwere going to do with that
degree?
I want it to be a diplomat.
I think.
Or I would like, I was like, Ilike traveling.
I really like traveling.
So let me study internationalrelations and human rights.
(08:00):
Not the fuck the fuck.
Am I going to do with that?
What the fuck.
I was part of an organization incollege that sent students on
internships and like volunteer.
No, this fucking, This program,is it program?
It's what is it?
It's like a nonprofit.
It's a cult.
It is a cult.
Yes.
It's so strange.
We've been, we like last year wewere in Amsterdam and we were
(08:21):
like, just biking through bundlepark.
And some random fucking guygoes.
And then we stop and it's somefucking random person that he
was in an organization with.
Yeah.
I'm not it's so strange to me.
It was like the whole spread tothe little grubby fingers.
It was an internationalnonprofit.
Not-for-profit that like, it wasan international not-for-profit.
(08:41):
That just send students abroad.
Was it called AIESEC sounds likea fucking call.
It is.
It is.
And if anyone's watching thesuicide.
It wasn't it, you know, it's acool.
It's so random.
Crane with them.
I went to Ukraine, my sophomoreyear of college.
With this organization, theysent me to Ukraine.
Yeah.
Just teach English.
I don't know.
It was fine.
How long were you in Ukrainefall?
(09:02):
Three months.
No, this is significant.
Kia for three months.
Yeah.
I was in Korea for three months.
That's crazy.
I know right now it's actuallyso wild.
How old were you when you livedin sophomore?
So that means.
no, no, no, no, no.
20, oh, come over like 19.
Yeah.
The second year.
Yeah, second year.
Okay.
(09:23):
Sophomore.
So I will let.
As in softball, I like to saythat.
It's not so much longer than youthink it is sophomore.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's crazy.
Why?
I don't know.
This is non English language.
Podcasts.
I'm sorry.
I like to go off on a littletangent.
Continue.
Because I have to remember mythoughts.
Fucking story.
I was part of the organizationand after college I took up an
(09:44):
internship with them in Germanybecause I was like, I was
deciding whether to was at afork in the road after college.
I was like, I could either go towork in Dallas in sales because
I was applying for sales jobs.
Cause that was the only thing Icould find that would actually
like qualify for.
It's fun.
No.
Okay.
From what I've heard.
(10:04):
I've been once.
I don't like it.
But I was like, let's go there.
Cause I got a job offer at thisrandom, like to be.
To be a cold caller to coldcall.
And to do that, I was justtelling you yesterday, I hate
cold calls.
I know from everyone, I hatecold calls from friends from
like, why would I do.
It's don't call Columbia.
I'd never pick up a cold call.
So why would I do that as a job?
So I either had that, or I waslooking for internships around
(10:26):
the world.
This organization.
Hypocrite dirty liar.
I'm not a duty liar.
So I found an internship inFrankfurt, Germany, Frankfurt.
So I packed up my little gay bagand moved to Germany after
college.
My internship was sick for ayear with D H L as a data
analytics intern.
(10:47):
Please note that none of thethings that I've mentioned had
anything to do with my degree, Ihad no qualifications.
I said, I know how to work anExcel sheet.
So I moved to Germany for that.
I was like, no, I'm not going todo that anymore.
So I quit at six months in and Iwas also starting to do like my
influencer work.
Then I was like, I have sixmonths left on this visa.
Let's move to Berlin becauseFrankfurt is boring.
Is.
Oh, it sucked.
Sorry.
It's so.
I'm sorry.
(11:07):
I'm sorry.
Photos here.
Frank photos, you got thesausage, the sausage is good.
What else they have buildingbuildings.
Buildings buildings.
Just a gigantic apple.
Yeah.
I'm all.
mole.
Yeah.
Who cares about the mall?
I don't.
So I moved to Berlin for therest of my.
Visa new.
No one took a little train, gota little apartment And chapter
(11:29):
one close.
That's how I made it to Berlin.
Chapter one closed.
Chapter two.
Oh my fucking God.
So here we are me.
I'm living in Berlin.
working in this random office.
I'm Customer it's a customersales.
Personal shopping program thing.
But it's not, it's just like acustomer service advisor for
(11:52):
Net-a-Porter like that branch,that company.
And I would just tell peoplelike what to buy or like, Help
people with that, like online onyour site.
Perfect.
It was just like an Englishspeaking job in Berlin.
I was like, literally typed inGoogle.
We speaking jobs, Bellin, andthen I went and I obviously got
it.
I was like, oh my God, that's socool.
(12:12):
I got this really cool job.
And it was not glamorous in theslightest because it was in this
disgusting building in theater,hoists plats.
Where it is so far away fromeveryone and everywhere.
And it took me like an hour tocommute.
It was really, truly awful.
I was like, I'm living inBerlin.
And my life is amazing.
But is it?
Cause I would go out everysingle weekend.
(12:34):
And oh, just if you knowanything about like the party
culture in Berlin, it's itconsumes you.
And that first year wasconsumed.
And then like within the secondyear.
So this is now 2017.
I was like, let me slow the fuckdown.
Pump your brakes pump thefucking brakes because I don't
feel so good.
Let me pump the brakes.
(12:54):
Let me go, let me take my ass totherapy.
I've been living in Berlin for ayear now.
And the thought goes to me,wait.
Fucking Hey.
I literally.
Spend the full year partying andjust doing the Berlin thing,
which is what was it, very allconsuming.
And I was like, let me shut thefuck up.
Sit the fuck down.
(13:15):
And pump the brakes a second.
And then when I really analyzemy life, I feel like I have
these moments every so often Ifeel like I had it.
Recently in at the end of 2024,I had it in 20.
When was this now?
2017, beginning of 2017.
Maybe it's the satin return, butlike what returns in every six
years?
I don't know.
It's fucking mine are now.
(13:37):
You just have to take a hardlook at yourself.
Mazda's like MAs my mom'sreturned.
Every like couple of times thenfucking return.
It was like, Hey, I got aminute.
What you're doing?
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
I had decided I wanted to leave.
Bellin within the year.
Because I stopped going out somuch.
And then like when you stoppedgoing out, you're like
friendship group, like dwindlesdown because you realize, you.
(13:58):
Part your friends are just like,just that they're just potty
friends.
And I had a good group of likepeople around me still, but it
wasn't enough to keep me that.
And it also language barrier.
I'm sorry, I just was nevergoing to learn German.
It's just not an attractivelanguage.
You've seen those videos.
Haven't you of the, like thepeople compare like beautiful
(14:19):
words in different languages.
It's like ambulance in English.
And then in French, it's likeample.
And then in Spanish it's like,um, And then in German, it's
con.
Butterfly.
why.
And tha.
(14:42):
What's the, what's the word fora queue?
Like a line they call it, Oh,it's translated to waiting snake
out the waiting snake.
But do you remember how topronounce it?
No, I just thought just slungit.
Is that the word.
My favorite thing is that thebirth control pill is called
anti baby pill, and I love agood anti baby pill.
(15:03):
So cute.
Hey, one 90, maybe Belinda,please.
But in no world, would I want tolearn that language and speak it
fluently?
I'm sorry.
No.
I'm sorry.
No, sorry.
But yeah.
Okay.
People do.
And I have so many friends thatare still that and like good for
that.
I think it's a bit crazy aboutgood for that.
And I personally, I was like, Iwant to move to a place where I
(15:23):
can like a, speak a languageagain.
Like I forgot how easy that wasto get a job I actually enjoyed.
And then, progressing some sortof career path that was
creative.
Creative cause I was just like,ah, fucking desk every day.
typing behind a fucking keyboardspeaking to the most dull
people, it was just such a bore.
It was like Berlin was fun inthe summer months.
And then the rest of my life, itjust seems so mundane.
(15:45):
All of a sudden I was just onthe train for an hour and a half
commuting every single day backand forth.
And I was like, what the fuck isthis?
Both the fuck is the point.
What did I move this whole?
Did I move here for, I likemoved here to have a fun life.
And I just, like, all of asudden was like in the, like the
rat race, the Berlin rat race,which is a really shitty, sad,
little rat race to be in.
(16:06):
I might say.
And then I was like, okay, letme look for different options.
So Commonwealth visa wise, I waslike, either are moving to New
Zealand or I'm moving to Canada.
And I was like, okay, fine.
Kind of just a little bit closeas, let me just move to Canada.
I was applying for my visa.
At the beginning of the summerof 2017.
Pride was happening.
(16:27):
My best friend Lexi came tovisit me from the UK.
We had like grand old gay time.
And then a week later.
No, I'm not even a week later,she left me on the Monday.
Yeah, it was Monday.
She left me on the Monday afterpride and then you messaged me
on Grindr.
It was like a Tuesday evening.
I was watching game of Thrones.
(16:47):
In my little room.
Oh, my fucking bedroom.
And Bellin was so nice.
It was full hundred.
It was 450 Euro and it was afucking huge.
Yeah, it was so big.
I know.
I left that bedroom.
I was the best.
It was the best thought uponwhat was so nice.
It was so cheap.
I'm sat, minding my ownbusiness.
Watching game of Thrones.
And I decided to open mygrinder, just.
(17:10):
To have a chat.
See who's around just to grind.
Grind.
It was their intention.
I just want it to like chart.
And I wanted to chat.
He messaged me on Grindr.
How did you say you up?
No.
From my perspective, I'm notactually watching game of
Thrones and you're like,messaging me like, Hey, Heats
and repairs.
(17:30):
Hey, what's up.
I don't know what theconversation was about, but it
was like very, Hey, like howyou, and let me like, great, how
are you?
What are you up to?
And then I like check hisprofile and I was like, He's
nice to keep.
This is really what did youactually say?
So embarrassing a little bit.
Oh, my God.
I remember seeing your photos.
(17:51):
And it was like, you'reactually, you look so cool.
Cause you have like you're onInstagram then you think you had
20,000 followers or something atthis point I was in the early
stages.
Instagram.
I thought that was like, cool.
It was so cool.
And you had these I don't know,in 20 16, 20 17 standards, like
really cool photos.
If you was to look at them rightnow, you think he was.
Fucking loser.
Disgusting.
And I was like, oh my God, thisguy's so hot.
(18:14):
and then at the same, at thetime to actually I think I just
decreased my age limit on it.
Cause I think I had very strict.
Two year younger limits.
On Grindr.
Yeah.
And then I think I moved it too,because I think you're like, you
knew you were like two years andtwo months younger than me.
And so I think I changed it tothree.
I was like, I'm 20.
(18:35):
How old?
I just tend to about, yeah, 25.
I think I turned that year.
And so you were 22 turning 23that year.
And I was like, let me let mejust broaden my fucking horizons
because everyone's a fuckinglame, unlike us, you knew there
was someone.
And people on Grindr or it wasjust like, I think I'd reached a
point.
I was like partying with myfriends and I was like, let me
hook up a bit.
Let me just enjoy.
My life, actually, the reason Idownloaded Grindr for the first
(18:57):
time, like around pride month.
And then cause pride in Berlinis July.
And I downloaded it and I waslike, let me be a slut.
Let me be a slut for a second.
And then I like, did it feellike, okay, I think I had it for
a week.
And I slithered on him.
One guy.
I like went to some guy's house.
His name was redacted.
And he w he was so strange.
(19:19):
He was like, so odd.
And I was like, this cannot bethe pool.
I've of humans I'm working with.
Let me like expand my reachslightly.
And so I did, and I was like, Iwas fully in the mindset that I
was like, I want to be a slotfor a little while.
And then you slid into my DMS.
We met weekly.
And I literally like here weare.
As I added the fuck was the,what the fuck was that?
(19:42):
You were literally out of oneweek of being a slut and then I
put a ring on it, basically.
I'm Laura saying.
Yeah, stick to my fucking guns.
Then how did we actually meet.
I do love telling the story.
Okay.
It's summer.
Remember?
This summer in July.
Slot summer slots.
It was supposed to be supposedlyslot summer, ended up being
fucking, put a ring on itsummer.
(20:05):
And he was messaging me onGrindr that Tuesday we talked
about nothing, but game ofThrones for a full week, we just
tried shit.
Like it was so PG.
It was actually embarrassing.
Yeah, it was like very baby.
How are you?
And oh yeah.
Good.
Thank you.
How.
Did you have lunch today?
We're like, what the fuck are wedoing?
All of a sudden we were this oldmarried couple, like we hadn't
(20:25):
even met yet.
And the following weekend Inever, ever in my life at that
time would have ever gone to thegym on a weekend.
But something inside mecompelled me.
To get my ass out of bed and goto the gym on a Saturday.
Call it kismet.
Shut the fuck up.
Don't you use my languageagainst me here.
(20:47):
I decided.
Because I was there cause I alsowent to the gym on that fated
Saturday.
I got to the gym and we're thebench next to each other.
Do you remember, did you everthat there was like a pillar in
between us.
We were like dying.
And it was like on a corner andthere was a pillar in between,
and then two benches, likefacing separate mirrors.
So we could see each other outof the corner of our eyes, see
you on your adjacent mirror.
(21:08):
And you could see me on myadjuster.
And I was like, oh, this guy'sreally hot.
And I was like, this looks likethe person I'm speaking to on
Grindr, but like he's in person.
So like he looks differentobviously.
Cause.
People do they look different?
Also you fucking photos with, sonow, like truly looking back on
it, I can say this with hand onmy heart.
Like with my full chest and saythere were so fucking lame.
(21:28):
Like you did the full 2016, liketravel blogger, like Shanghai.
Yeah, the table was really cool,but I was like, you were being
so like moody and mysterious andit was like, is this is this the
same guy that's next to me rightnow.
I kept trying to make eyecontact with him.
And he like.
just wouldn't look in mydirection.
And I was like, he's either sofucking rude and so obnoxious,
(21:48):
or it's not him.
And so I guess the third option.
Little did I know it was asecret.
Third option.
He just wouldn't look at me.
And I went to another machineand we were doing like chest,
I'm not chest.
Sorry.
We were doing row was the cablerows on actually adjacent
machines that I was facing him.
(22:09):
He was facing me diagonally toeach other.
He still wouldn't look at me andhe was being so weird and I was
like, okay, but he's definitelynot the same person or he's
being a con.
And, Yeah, it was a secret thirdoption.
He messaged me on Grindr andsaid, Hey, are you in the gym?
Hey, are you in the gym?
I said, Hey, smiley face.
Could you maybe perhaps be inthe gym and he's like right
(22:31):
beside of me.
He's actually left and went tothe other.
The same amount of space as youare right now on this podcast.
Then you were on the bench.
You mentioned, I think gumption,I didn't have gumption.
Then I was very shy.
I was, I'm a Virgo and I am notas shy as I was back then.
I was a very Virgo back then.
And now I would actually talk toyou in the gym.
It's actually know your.
(22:52):
Too hot.
oh, my.
If I saw you in the gym today, Iwould not.
You're intimidating.
Really?
You also have a resting bitchface when you.
I have a resting bitch face metoo, but also like, you know,
you see, I feel like I look moreintimidating that I'm like, I
don't oh, totally.
I don't really walk aroundsmiling.
(23:13):
Cause what's the, what such asmile about.
What do you mean?
What is that to smile about?
I mean, lots.
I'll shut up.
Ah, shucks.
Well, I could name.
Not shucks.
Anyway, he messaged me on Grindrand I, in my mind, I'm like, if
he leaves the gym and we don'tspeak.
I'm never going to speak to thisperson ever again.
(23:35):
But we were so close to me.
I was like, this is such anembarrassing move because why
would you not just say hello?
I think I.
I would really valued likeconfidence and like, you know,
gumption to like, you know, Getup and like, You know, Just grab
what you want.
Grab by the ball.
Life by the bowls.
And, I could see him like he wasfrom in one room about to leave
(23:57):
and go to leave, like leave.
Going to leave the gym.
I was done with my workout.
I was leaving the gym.
And I said it's now whenever Igot up off of the attic with the
equipment and that was on and Iturned him around.
I like went to the exit towardsthe exec.
And grabbed his shoulder andturned him around and I was
like, oh, hi.
And he was so sweet and he got.
You got so like rad.
(24:18):
I could tell he was like, soembarrassed.
I was like, we were just bothlike at the gym suit, we were
like sweaty.
Anyway.
And like I could tell he waslike really flushed.
And I was like, hi, it's melike, blah, blah, blah.
And we were like chatting for asecond.
And then there'd be exchangenumbers, or like we had
exchanged numbers on Grindr.
We had already exchangednumbers.
I think we were talking onWhatsApp at that point and then
no.
Oh, my God.
What.
(24:39):
You gave me a number on WhatsAppand I messaged you on WhatsApp.
Oh, yeah.
And then I was like, that'sreally rude.
Oh yeah.
I messaged.
That morning.
On WhatsApp and then, cause Ithink he thought I was someone
else.
Yeah.
I thought you were like somerandom person.
I thought you were a person fromthe organization I used to work
with in college.
And that's why I was like, whywould I respond to this?
Why would that person text you?
(25:00):
I don't know.
And then I realize I'm alsoOmar.
No, there wasn't actually aperson.
I just thought it was a randomperson.
I didn't think I realized that.
It's Omar.
I didn't realize who it was.
I think in my mind, I just didnot connect.
So it took me like a day torespond.
I think I might've messaged youon like the Friday night and
then in the morning, you stillhadn't responded?
And it was like, that's reallyrude because you'd given me your
number by this point.
(25:20):
And I was like, I'm going to,I'm going to text you on
WhatsApp now.
And, that I was like, I also, Iwas like, I texted you on
WhatsApp.
And he was like, oh, I didn'tknow.
That was you.
Yes.
Yes.
Let this be a lesson, a lifelesson, folks.
Chase after your dreams anddesires.
And, also chase men across thegym.
(25:42):
Chase man, across the genetics.
Ray Moto chase men across thegym.
Get some gumption.
God damn it.
I have gumption now.
Yeah.
Okay.
I have gumption now.
So we were talking about ourfirst date or what we wanted to
do.
We were going to hang out twodays later from that time.
I think it was Monday that wehung out.
I remember I think that was sadand you're like, what are you
doing tonight?
And I was like, oh, I'll havethis party in this like
(26:03):
abandoned building.
And you were like, whoa.
I'm not cool enough.
I remember you were like, whatthe fuck is this person?
I was like, I'm here to tell.
I'm going to this like randomrave at this, abandoned in this
abandoned building, near myneighborhood with this, like one
of my like artist friends, andlike one of his dumb fucking
friends who were fucking lowwith it at the time, but I was
like, there'll be funny.
(26:24):
I'll be a funny night out.
We were that to 7:00 AM.
I'm walking home at 7:00 AM.
And I was like texting yousuggested hanging out that
night, but then you had thisrave.
And we were like okay.
Okay.
Let's organize for Monday.
We said like Monday let's do alot.
I'm sorry, I'm not giving you aSaturday.
Don't be silly.
We did a Monday date, short,whatever.
And I was like, I would like to,yeah.
What was my suggestion?
You suggested the date first andit was a bad suggestion.
(26:48):
I think this is a fuckingexcellent suggestion.
If you know anything aboutBerlin, In Prenzlauer Berg,
there is a wine bar it's calleddiva.
And I, the winery.
On the weekdays, you can go andthey do wine tastings.
This is the actual thing thatthey do.
Did you wine tastings and youcan pay at the end of your like
evening, how much you think thenight was worth.
(27:09):
or like you donate.
Basically how much you drank.
I was poor, so I would go andget shit face and then give a
couple of Euro and be like, woo.
What aren't cheap.
What a cheap knife.
That's so fun.
I was like, let's do this.
Let's go to this wine bar, getshit faced.
It will be so fun.
It would be so cheap.
And it's a really fun thing todo on a Monday night, not as a
first day.
And then you will like.
(27:29):
It's really nice in one that'sgot to the park.
Yeah.
Cause it was a beautiful Julyevening or afternoon.
And I was like, let's just go tothe park, hang out, have a
couple beers.
Yeah.
I bought bears.
I bring any wireless you tobring anything.
I'm sorry.
No, you were a little shit,actually.
I stopped at the shop on theway.
(27:50):
Let's go to the park.
And I was like, ah, Grudgingly.
I was like, fine.
I was like, I really want to go.
It's a Monday night.
I want to get shit faced.
Yeah.
My favorite wine bar on a Mondaynight.
To yarrow or you can go to thepark and sit with a nice boy and
have a couple Rattlers.
Rattlers.
(28:11):
Yeah.
And that's what we did,honestly, in hindsight, if we
had gone to the winery, thatnight.
I don't think we would be hereright now.
No, I would have seen theGemini.
No, it would have been, I wouldhave been fun.
You would have had such a goodtime for sure.
But I don't think we would be inthe same.
It's not the same vibe.
Yeah.
Because what ended up happeningwas I got on my little bike.
(28:32):
I rode my bike.
Did you?
You're going to cancel.
You told me like, yeah.
Probably nervous.
I thought you were so hot.
I thought you were so attractiveand cool.
And I was so overwhelmed andthought you were out of my
league.
Definitely.
So I was like, I'm sick.
Oh, yeah, no, you didn't though,because if you did literally
(28:53):
wouldn't be here.
So I took the SPN and I got overmy fucking nerves.
Cause I was a little piece ofshit shy boy.
And I got over there and then Imet you at the park.
Yeah.
It was like, I was waiting atthe entrance because I got that.
Uncharacteristically early on mybicycle.
So cool.
Cause you had a little light,you had one of your colorful
shirts wrapped around your waistand you had a tank top on I was
like, whoa, who.
Was this crazy guy and yet allhis jewelry and tattoos.
(29:15):
And I was like what.
And then I had my bike and thenin my life, Tote bag of like
beers and I had no tattoos.
Rolling cigarettes by.
I was like probably rolling acigarette and I look like a
loser.
I'm pretty sure.
No, you came, you rang like acap, you rang like a baseball
cap and you had a thing you hadlike a t-shirt on.
I just looked like a good oldAmerican boy.
Yeah.
(29:35):
Yeah, he looked very like cleancut.
Great.
Which at the time was really mytype for some fucking reason.
We've we've grown.
We've uh, Um, So we sat at thepark.
We just had to go.
The whole spot.
Yeah.
The little hill at mal park inthe Bentley.
Lately in our neighborhood.
And.
It was like five or five day.
(29:56):
And then we like.
Sorry.
And just talked and all of asudden 10.
10 hours.
Nope.
Nope.
Nope.
All of a sudden it was 10:00 PM.
Like all of a sudden, like thetime had just flown by, we
didn't know, it was decideduntil the mosquitoes came out
and we were like, oh my God.
Look at the time.
It's crazy.
I'm itching.
(30:17):
Oh, this is crazy.
Like we should go.
Cause we talked about everythingunder the sun.
We talked about everything.
I feel like we hit every singletopic.
We really did like, like, do youwant to have kids?
We said, no, not so much.
Do you want to have.
I don't know, but that was atopic of conversation.
what.
I don't think we were like, whatare your thoughts on kids?
eventually we were like talkingabout.
(30:38):
We're talking about familystuff.
Families are like.
And stuff.
I was like, oh my God.
Luckily never, you were likenever, I know it was like
perfect walk.
Let's lock in.
Perfect.
We also connected.
Deeply, unlike the fact that weboth grew up in really religious
families on different sides ofthe world.
I just had very similarexperiences, but just like
under.
(30:58):
The scrutiny and.
Of separate religions and justlike typical first queer date.
Yeah.
Childhood trauma dumping.
Bonding gorgeous.
And then, yeah, we like walkedover.
I walked him to the station.
I was like, let me take you tothe train station so that you
(31:19):
can go home and then I cancontinue on my bicycle to my
house.
And then we were walking by thischicken shop, reset chicken on
the corner of episodic.
Straza.
Rosa Ali.
And I was like, by the way, thatis like the best chicken shop,
like in the world.
Like it was, you know, thefluorescent lights were on, the
sun had just sat.
(31:39):
And I was like, by the way, thatis the best chicken chocolate,
the world.
And you were like, I'm fromthere.
I'm from North Carolina.
I'll be the judge of that.
I don't know why you soundedlike courage.
The cowardly.
The dog grandfather in.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Your Southern accent is not thebest.
I'm just, I'm not actuallytrying to imitate you.
I'm trying to bully you.
Great.
And I said, I know what friedchicken is let's go in and I'll
(32:01):
tell you.
So we got in, had the fightordered the fried chicken.
It wasn't even, it's not evenfried.
I wouldn't call it friedchicken.
It's just like it was chickenthat was fried.
So it's fried chicken, chickentenders.
I guess you could get the.
Like drumsticks.
You could get like a wholechicken, but like it's just
chicken tenders.
No.
What was all of that?
A.
it's we'll do.
(32:21):
I'll do.
This is why a one bitter.
Connie kind of each Hoben Zvi.
Ah, I petitioned Dunka.
So we got those and I tried itand it was great.
Yeah, it was great if I checkedand I was good looking back on
it, we have had it again.
It's not the best fried chicken.
(32:41):
Shut the fuck up.
But it's the memory that countsand it was us having fried
chicken.
Nice.
Yes.
It's while nice.
We had fried chicken on herfirst day.
It's so cute.
So cute.
It's unintentional friedchicken, which makes it bad
because intentional friedchicken was B would be like a
little bit.
A little bit Trashman.
Imagine my suggestion was to goget fried chicken.
They're like a wine bar.
(33:02):
Yeah.
Fried chicken.
We went from bureaus and friedchicken.
That's crazy, which honestly,like it fits.
Honestly, Honestly.
We've walked.
Then I walked into this trainstation and then.
Now that we're underneath theflickering lights of shin house.
Les Bon station.
He plants.
One on me.
I gave him a little pecker, lowpecker.
Pecker.
(33:26):
Put your packer or your Peteraway.
This is the first day.
Fuck.
Peanut freak.
I gave him a pack on the lips.
And my, I don't know why.
The fuck came over me.
I was like, She couldn't breath.
It was so stupid.
I was like, this would be sofunny to say.
And I said, oh my God, chickenbreasts.
(33:48):
Cause it was funny.
Like it literally just tastedlike fried chicken.
Yeah.
And then, I dunno, I think hethought I was so funny.
Yeah, charming.
Yeah, we both giggled and thenhe went on his Merry way.
Took the train one stop.
He could have walked, please.
He shit.
Oh, yeah.
I coulda, I don't know.
She shouldn't have the alley toPrenzlauer alley train station
is on 10 minute walk.
And then we saw each other everysingle day for a month.
(34:11):
Isn't that nice.
There was a day we like keptseeing each other every day.
Like we kept doing dates andlike Hangouts and like whatever.
There was a day that you weregoing to go to work.
You were going to go to workfrom your house.
And then there was it's like youhad something afterwards or you
you didn't have time to see methat day.
So you came over in the morningbefore you went to work and you
said hi so that you didn't breakour street.
(34:32):
Yeah, I think we had a straighthallway, so cute.
So cute.
No, it's so cute.
That's disgusting.
It's not our podcast now.
Did you know why it's soembarrassing?
I was a different person than Iwould never know.
It was sweet.
Really cute.
It was so cute.
I hate everything.
That's not true.
(34:53):
You pretend that you have a hardshell.
But you don't use that voice.
Don't use that voice with thepublic.
With the public listening.
I, yeah, I did that.
I did that.
I thought it was so cute.
Yeah, you were, no, in my mind,I was like, I think you were
busy.
You we had something.
I was a big influencer back inthe day.
Oh, please.
(35:13):
And don't tell I was.
I was the cream of the crop.
We want to do a career.
Korea episode.
Yeah.
Like the stupid jobs that we'veworked are so funny.
I was doing what he was doingfor work at the time is like
truly the most dumb thing I'veever heard anyone ever do.
Next episode, for sure.
Sure.
I remember one thing vividlyabout living in.
But you didn't have that manyfriends cause you like didn't
(35:34):
have a workplace to go to.
I was self-employed.
Yeah.
So you like found a bunch oflike random content creators.
If you know anything aboutGerman influences, my God.
They are insufferable.
You think where.
Inseparable.
We're in sufferable oh my God.
Throw a German.
my fucking Christ.
All mine got, oh my God.
(35:55):
It was so crazy.
I would meet these people on Istarted going to like events,
like influencer events with him.
And I was like, this is such acool and crazy life.
What the fuck?
I didn't meet all these weirdos.
And then like he would meet myfriends and I had a billion
friends in Berlin at this pointthat I'd been there for a year
and a half by this point.
And I was at come into like myfriends cycle.
(36:16):
Cause they were like a lot morenormal.
Relatively.
Okay.
Then the majority.
We're a little bit insane.
But yeah, I was like, let meintroduce you to like actually
normal people.
And I feel like.
Really reached a point in Berlinwhere I was like, oh, I feel
like life is so nice now.
But then I was like, I.
With we just started dating andI was like, I'm already applying
(36:37):
for my visa for Canada, by theway, just so you know.
Because, you know why you don'tmind.
That do you know why?
I decided, like I already knew Iwanted to, and then there was
one moment.
I think it was like June thatyear.
Like bright before we met, I waslike, I was so sick.
And then I went into the little.
Underneath, like my building.
(36:58):
I was so ill and I was like,counting my change.
And I was like being reallyslow.
Cause I was just like, oh, wesuck so feeble.
And oh my God, I just have feltso ill.
And I'm trying to get my grocerysupplies so I can go upstairs
and have a little fucking soupor something.
And the fucking Cassia, SLAM's ahand.
On the count and she's actually,yeah.
Which means.
(37:19):
I don't know, it was like, fuckyou.
Uh, it was really hard to countmy fucking, your rose.
This is when you decided to.
I went upstairs and I was like,let me submit my application.
You can't.
you told me that you wereleaving and I had already had an
extended visa application.
I was planning on extending myvisa.
Because I realized by thatpoint, you, this six months,
there's.
Was up There was some wiggleroom.
(37:39):
I had my application in.
You were in Eagle?
No.
I had my apple.
You were an illegal, you're anillegal you weren't illegal.
Wow.
How the turntables turn.
I now know I had my applicationin to extend my visa in Germany.
Like I was going to like thefucking, oh, it was a place.
If you know anything aboutGermany, paperwork in Germany.
the amped called.
Burger around the boat grant islike the registration.
(38:01):
But like the visa one is a veryspecific.
The scary ones you have to getthere.
I'd five, eight.
Yeah.
To.
Oh my God.
If you know anything about likeGerman bureaucracy, like you
have to register.
These like burger MCs, likeregistration offices.
And the people who work that arelike, it's just like a billion,
carbon copies of Roz frommonsters Inc.
They literally standing thereI'm watching you.
(38:25):
but in German.
Yeah.
But is that I couldn't evenbudget.
You mentioned watching monsterthinking German.
I don't know.
Horrible.
Disgusting.
Gross.
I was still working my visa.
And then you told me that youwere moving and I was like,
Yeah, I don't really like hereeither.
So let's move to Canada becauseit was also easy for me to get a
visa for Canada.
Yeah.
If you think about it though,like pots crazy that you were
(38:46):
like, I think we'd been datingfor I don't know, a couple
months by this point when youwill also like, I'm also going
to move, but intentionally, likewe weren't intentioned, we
weren't intentionally planningon moving together.
I was like, I'm moving you move.
No, but I knew that I didn'tlike Germany, so I was like, I
want to move somewhere else.
And I don't want to move back tothe us.
Cause I was still in mytraveling era.
I was like, let's experience theworld.
(39:06):
Over that.
So I wanted to put together.
So then I moved to, they movedto Canada.
You're talking about, we travelall the time.
No, I know, but not like livingplaces, I don't want to live in
any other countries.
Yeah, I'm done with that.
Maybe in the far future.
I'm living in the United Statesof America for now, until it
falls.
So you came to the table to hearabout how we met.
(39:27):
And you did.
And you learn.
Now, Now, you know?
yeah.
And if you ever repeat any ofthe mushy gushy stuff that I've
ever done ever again, I'm goingto fucking beat the shit out of
you.
The truth of the matter is year.
I'm not, you are.
You are.
You are and don't you let.
I just want to forget it.
(39:49):
We're pretty.
Down memory lane.
Almost eight.
You remember the fragrance wherewe saw.
Now that we've just finished theepisode, I'm gonna.
But we actually should smell itagain.
We went to a lush event in Idunno, maybe the first couple of
months he started dating.
And they like have this likelimited edition fragrance
launch.
And we each took a differentfragrance home each and we just
(40:12):
wore them through the firstcouple months of dating and we
still have the bottles andthey're both empty, but they
still smell.
Because the frigates was sostrong, it was very like
cinnamony, like earthy.
Smells.
And, they don't do them anymoretoday.
No, but they was so like everytime, like I get the ball out,
smell it.
It literally like smells reallydo.
Bring you, right?
(40:33):
Oh, it brings me right back to.
That summer and Berlin.
Yeah.
And reminds me of you.
It's crazy.
As I, as soon as I smell it,memories, flood back, I'm like
watching my life, go behind my,go back.
What flashed by.
Slash behind.
What lash in front of your eyes?
Behind watching my life flashedin front of my eyes flash before
(40:53):
your eyes.
Fucking out.
Behind your eyes.
In between I said, in betweenyour eyes, between your.
No, he's not that.
And then it's everything, allthe memories come back and it's
really cute.
Ah, You know, What else is cute?
Fucking did a table game.
Yeah.
That's.
We're about to play right now.
(41:14):
Would you rather.
We have been to so many placestogether.
I traveled far and wide.
Would you rather.
B.
Living in Berlin.
Okay.
Still.
Okay.
But together.
Yeah.
Okay.
Um, Should we have the sameincome that we have?
Right now.
Yeah.
Or back then?
No, now.
(41:34):
Now.
Oh, now fuck not back then.
Life would be great if we livein Berlin right now, it'd be.
Oh, we were poor, but oh my God,poverty.
Did you hear about me countingmy fucking, my euros little.
Grounding for my 25 cents.
I'd rather be living in Berlinright now, still with the same
income that I have right now.
Same income that you have rightnow or.
(41:56):
Living in.
Canada.
Oh, living in Toronto.
Living in Toronto.
Toronto really?
Yeah.
I think it's Toronto.
I got crazy, mostly because Iwant access to the United
States.
Oh, I love America.
I want to be close to here.
I feel like I would enjoy it.
No, I think I'd say by then.
(42:16):
Cause I feel like.
I'd prefer the, if I had theincome, like that was a one big
thing.
Like you don't get paid shit.
Sure.
But I've done the Europe shit.
I've done the.
Shit.
I've.
I've done.
I've done it.
I've been there so many times.
I've lived there so much.
I've been around.
Yeah, that's true.
I've got so much more of thisside of the world to do.
And Asia.
(42:38):
Well, It wasn't one of my bigpet peeves.
I know.
We'll say like, oh yeah, we did.
We did Thailand.
we did Spain this summer.
I have so much of this side ofthe world, Asia to see.
And experience it.
So I'd rather do that one of mybest friends lives in Belden.
So I'd love to move back toBerlin.
one of my best friends living inToronto.
Wait, then they're listening to,sorry.
(42:59):
I love you guys.
Let me you all equally, whatwould you do?
You.
Do Berlin for sure.
I think.
Yeah.
Okay.
We're splitting up then.
I'm living in Toronto.
Fuck.
You know what, that's, how wemet them.
This is how we break up.
And thank you so much forlistening.
And that's a decade of.
Almost a decade.
I know, almost a decade, 10years.
It's not even eight yet.
(43:20):
I know it's seven and a half sofar.
I know, but it's not, it'salmost.
Let's not get ahead ofourselves.
Let's see, we'll see if we makeit that far.
Yes.
Thanks for digging in with ustoday.
We really appreciate it verymuch.
So.
Um, Clean up after yourself asyou leave.
And don't let the door.
Hi.
(43:40):
Where the good Lord.
I think that's so funny.
I love that.
I love that one.
The biggest Doug Dodd joke ever.
Why don't you say it more often?
So good.
Because I don't hate people thatmuch.
Do you hate our listeners?
No.
Don't let the door hit youweathered.
The good Lord's blessed.
So funny.
It's just a good one.
That's a good one.
That's dumb.
Don't forget to rate us whereveryou listen to your podcasts.
(44:00):
Watch us on YouTube.
Follow us on Instagram, Tik TOK.
And we'll see you next time.
Goodbye or should we say.
Choosy.
I'll feed the sane.
Can you believe we've beentogether for almost eight years?
(00:03):
I cannot.
And do you know why?
I cannot believe it because youfucking insufferable.
Hey.
This is crazy work.
It's almost a decade.
Raisy work.
I think gay is that's like 5billion years.
That's what I like dinosaurs.
Like I try Sarah tops.
You wouldn't be a triceratops.
I would be a stegosaurus.
(00:24):
No, the big long neck ones, likethe cutesy, like golden
retrievers of the dinosaurs.
The ones with the long necks.
The big tall ones.
I don't know.
I only know the names of thedinosaurs from power ranges.
I think it's a.
Triceratops.
The saber tooth tiger.
I don't know.
I don't think they existed inthe same.
Era, no savers is hacker.
No, no, no.
They were no fries.
(00:44):
By the power and just hard whatwas it?
The Tara dactyl is that theflying one?
Pink power ranger and then thefucking yellow ranger was the,
saber tooth tiger.
I mean, I don't think it was.
Okay.
Alright.
Oh, so did like Oxy.
All of them are dead.
Hi.
Hello.
Welcome back to another episodeof let's dig in.
(01:08):
you, You took it too far.
You started it.
Oh, come on.
You.
That wretched.
Welcome back to let's.
Dig in.
This is a podcast.
So we like to sit around thedinner table and talk shit.
Yeah.
To join us and to talk shit.
Well, Listen to us talk shit.
You can't really talk becauseyou're not on the podcast, but
we are, so you have to listen tous.
(01:29):
I kind of would like it.
If you did also talk to yourselfor respond in your own way.
Yeah.
To yourself, maybe.
In private, not in publicbecause then people will think
you're weird.
Do we one fuck.
We thought today would be a goodat time to introduce you to more
of us.
Yeah.
I'm like, this is what episodefour now.
Yeah.
What the fuck were we doing?
(01:50):
I'm like, Hey, you're like, whothe fuck are you?
why am I just listening to you?
Ramble on about.
British versus American bullshitand your random like ins and
outs because we're entertaining.
We are so entertaining.
So entertaining.
We were like, here we are in ourliving room, just like talking
shit around the dinner table.
Yeah, this is an hour.
Actually this dinner table.
(02:11):
If you're watching on YouTube.
This table is our little patiofurniture that we bring.
In from outside because it's theonly table that makes sense to
do this.
We do have an eight C or let'sjust tube noxious.
We have an eight Cedar diningtable.
Around that.
The two of us just being like,hello.
Yeah.
We are.
Yeah, it'd be funny.
We wanted to tell you about howwe met and our relationship, the
(02:34):
Yan.
I told you I was in jail everysingle time.
Without further ado.
Here is our meat.
Cute.
Let's dig in.
Why did we meet.
We met in Berlin.
Which is crazy.
Crazy.
I'm from North Carolina.
He's from the UK.
We met in Berlin internationalrum.
(02:57):
Come meet acute.
Which is kind of crazy becauseyou studied international
relations at university andyou've ever used that degree in
your entire life apart fromgetting an international
relationship.
Nope.
I paid$30,000 to marry a Britishman.
Yeah, you're both fantastic.
You're welcome.
Okay, you're welcome.
Thank you, your welcome for thegreen card.
Yeah, you're right.
(03:18):
You're welcome for the constantentertainment and endless.
Projects and career venturesthat we have been able to, Oh
right there.
The thoughts, right there manywords in my brain, I'm telling
you, there are so many words,but then none of them come out
and it annoys me.
Does that happen to you?
No.
My thoughts are prettystreamlined.
No mine on.
It's it's literally like,Grabbing smoke.
(03:40):
You are a Gemini.
So Berlin, how did we both getto Berlin in the first place?
I moved to Berlin.
Cause I was like, let's move tothe place where I can be like an
absolutely insane person for alittle while The only reason I
moved to Berlin because I waslike, Hmm.
Where can I go where I can beabsolutely deranged without any
consequences?
What year did you do this?
(04:01):
This was 20 16, 20 16.
Back let's back it up.
Let's go back to the beginning.
If you didn't already know, Igrew up in the UK and then I
moved from, the UK to Australiaafter I graduated university.
Cause I was like, fuck thisplace.
Yeah.
So, Sorry.
It's just like a little bit sadand boring as we discussed on
the previous episode.
(04:22):
Lots of ex about the UK.
Love it.
I love it.
I love.
I love to visit.
I do love to visit.
But I really don't think I canever live there again.
I don't know why.
I just like the world is theworld is gigantic and the United
Kingdom is just a tiny cluster.
Fuck of islands.
Don't need to live on a teenytiny island.
No.
And so.
I set sail to the winds, thewinds beneath my sales and the
(04:44):
sales beneath my above my.
Boat.
My airplane wing my vessel.
Yeah.
Fucking flew to Melbourne andmoved to Melbourne Australia.
When I was 22 years old.
Kind of full year of just eat,pray, loving the shower myself.
And then I.
Gotcha.
Australia.
I traveled Asia and I was like,wow, this is amazing.
I'm so cool.
(05:04):
My life is amazing.
And then I met like a bunch ofGerman people and I was like,
you're really fun.
You're like leave.
You're like, no, but you're sofun.
And I've been saying this youlike so fun.
And then I eventually moved tothere's a slight kerfuffle
involved in between.
I moved back to the UK for halfa second.
And then I met a boy who was apiece of shit.
(05:25):
Who's really good looking, buthe had the personality of a
boiled ag.
Yeah.
And I was like, oh my God.
What's that movie, do you know?
It's hard to be single.
It's a rebel Wilson and oh yeah.
Stupid bomb.
And they like talk about beingstuck in someone's Dick sound.
You like Dick's hand DickCassandra.
And when you're stuck insomeone's Dick sand, Dick sand.
(05:48):
Now you say it sounds reallydisgusting.
And it's like quick sound, butlike, it's Like you were stuck
into in that person's DickSanders.
And the orbit.
Yeah.
Don't want to be there orknowing as far.
Like they're a boy.
It's hot.
His heart he's high.
Oh, my God, you've got so manyarms and I'm like, is there
anything beyond that surface?
Not really.
And it took me a long time tofigure that out.
(06:09):
Anyway.
Fuck you.
Move to Berlin.
And was like, let me go and findmyself again because, oh, that
was a side quest.
I did not want to participatein.
You hideous.
And it was that for Bit toolong.
Eventually I found myself inBerlin, Germany.
Deutschland.
No anyone apart from one randomperson, I was like in a
(06:30):
backpackers hostel withinAustralia.
Yeah.
And.
then I, he introduced me to oneof his girlfriends who was from
the UK.
And then she had a bunch of likeBritish friends.
And then we just form this likehuge friendship group.
And I just pied like crazyperson.
that's what got me to Berlin.
I know we'll get to it.
We'll get to like how we metafterwards.
That's chapter one where we'rein our own chapter.
(06:52):
One's just starting my book now.
Yeah.
Welcome.
It's a better book.
I'm kidding.
You're actually, your story isway more exciting than mine.
Go on you.
Please.
Tell me more about this weirdorganization that you're a POV
shot.
Ah, I graduated.
College.
How's we call it.
Shut the fuck.
I graduated college in 2016.
(07:15):
From Appalachian stateuniversity.
16.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
Yeah, because I'm two yearsyounger than you.
Oh, yeah.
Oh yeah.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
I graduated in 2014.
I graduated university in 2016from Appalachia state university
in Boone, North Carolina.
With not a thought in my headabout what I wanted to do with
the rest of my life.
So I, while I was studyinginternational relations, Global
(07:36):
studies, which was a horrible,horrible decision that led me
into mountains of debt for noreason.
I can't do anything with that.
With the green, what.
What the fuck did you think youwere going to do with that
degree?
I want it to be a diplomat.
I think.
Or I would like, I was like, Ilike traveling.
I really like traveling.
So let me study internationalrelations and human rights.
(08:00):
Not the fuck the fuck.
Am I going to do with that?
What the fuck.
I was part of an organization incollege that sent students on
internships and like volunteer.
No, this fucking, This program,is it program?
It's what is it?
It's like a nonprofit.
It's a cult.
It is a cult.
Yes.
It's so strange.
We've been, we like last year wewere in Amsterdam and we were
(08:21):
like, just biking through bundlepark.
And some random fucking guygoes.
And then we stop and it's somefucking random person that he
was in an organization with.
Yeah.
I'm not it's so strange to me.
It was like the whole spread tothe little grubby fingers.
It was an internationalnonprofit.
Not-for-profit that like, it wasan international not-for-profit.
(08:41):
That just send students abroad.
Was it called AIESEC sounds likea fucking call.
It is.
It is.
And if anyone's watching thesuicide.
It wasn't it, you know, it's acool.
It's so random.
Crane with them.
I went to Ukraine, my sophomoreyear of college.
With this organization, theysent me to Ukraine.
Yeah.
Just teach English.
I don't know.
It was fine.
How long were you in Ukrainefall?
(09:02):
Three months.
No, this is significant.
Kia for three months.
Yeah.
I was in Korea for three months.
That's crazy.
I know right now it's actuallyso wild.
How old were you when you livedin sophomore?
So that means.
no, no, no, no, no.
20, oh, come over like 19.
Yeah.
The second year.
Yeah, second year.
Okay.
(09:23):
Sophomore.
So I will let.
As in softball, I like to saythat.
It's not so much longer than youthink it is sophomore.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's crazy.
Why?
I don't know.
This is non English language.
Podcasts.
I'm sorry.
I like to go off on a littletangent.
Continue.
Because I have to remember mythoughts.
Fucking story.
I was part of the organizationand after college I took up an
(09:44):
internship with them in Germanybecause I was like, I was
deciding whether to was at afork in the road after college.
I was like, I could either go towork in Dallas in sales because
I was applying for sales jobs.
Cause that was the only thing Icould find that would actually
like qualify for.
It's fun.
No.
Okay.
From what I've heard.
(10:04):
I've been once.
I don't like it.
But I was like, let's go there.
Cause I got a job offer at thisrandom, like to be.
To be a cold caller to coldcall.
And to do that, I was justtelling you yesterday, I hate
cold calls.
I know from everyone, I hatecold calls from friends from
like, why would I do.
It's don't call Columbia.
I'd never pick up a cold call.
So why would I do that as a job?
So I either had that, or I waslooking for internships around
(10:26):
the world.
This organization.
Hypocrite dirty liar.
I'm not a duty liar.
So I found an internship inFrankfurt, Germany, Frankfurt.
So I packed up my little gay bagand moved to Germany after
college.
My internship was sick for ayear with D H L as a data
analytics intern.
(10:47):
Please note that none of thethings that I've mentioned had
anything to do with my degree, Ihad no qualifications.
I said, I know how to work anExcel sheet.
So I moved to Germany for that.
I was like, no, I'm not going todo that anymore.
So I quit at six months in and Iwas also starting to do like my
influencer work.
Then I was like, I have sixmonths left on this visa.
Let's move to Berlin becauseFrankfurt is boring.
Is.
Oh, it sucked.
Sorry.
It's so.
I'm sorry.
(11:07):
I'm sorry.
Photos here.
Frank photos, you got thesausage, the sausage is good.
What else they have buildingbuildings.
Buildings buildings.
Just a gigantic apple.
Yeah.
I'm all.
mole.
Yeah.
Who cares about the mall?
I don't.
So I moved to Berlin for therest of my.
Visa new.
No one took a little train, gota little apartment And chapter
(11:29):
one close.
That's how I made it to Berlin.
Chapter one closed.
Chapter two.
Oh my fucking God.
So here we are me.
I'm living in Berlin.
working in this random office.
I'm Customer it's a customersales.
Personal shopping program thing.
But it's not, it's just like acustomer service advisor for
(11:52):
Net-a-Porter like that branch,that company.
And I would just tell peoplelike what to buy or like, Help
people with that, like online onyour site.
Perfect.
It was just like an Englishspeaking job in Berlin.
I was like, literally typed inGoogle.
We speaking jobs, Bellin, andthen I went and I obviously got
it.
I was like, oh my God, that's socool.
(12:12):
I got this really cool job.
And it was not glamorous in theslightest because it was in this
disgusting building in theater,hoists plats.
Where it is so far away fromeveryone and everywhere.
And it took me like an hour tocommute.
It was really, truly awful.
I was like, I'm living inBerlin.
And my life is amazing.
But is it?
Cause I would go out everysingle weekend.
(12:34):
And oh, just if you knowanything about like the party
culture in Berlin, it's itconsumes you.
And that first year wasconsumed.
And then like within the secondyear.
So this is now 2017.
I was like, let me slow the fuckdown.
Pump your brakes pump thefucking brakes because I don't
feel so good.
Let me pump the brakes.
(12:54):
Let me go, let me take my ass totherapy.
I've been living in Berlin for ayear now.
And the thought goes to me,wait.
Fucking Hey.
I literally.
Spend the full year partying andjust doing the Berlin thing,
which is what was it, very allconsuming.
And I was like, let me shut thefuck up.
Sit the fuck down.
(13:15):
And pump the brakes a second.
And then when I really analyzemy life, I feel like I have
these moments every so often Ifeel like I had it.
Recently in at the end of 2024,I had it in 20.
When was this now?
2017, beginning of 2017.
Maybe it's the satin return, butlike what returns in every six
years?
I don't know.
It's fucking mine are now.
(13:37):
You just have to take a hardlook at yourself.
Mazda's like MAs my mom'sreturned.
Every like couple of times thenfucking return.
It was like, Hey, I got aminute.
What you're doing?
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
I had decided I wanted to leave.
Bellin within the year.
Because I stopped going out somuch.
And then like when you stoppedgoing out, you're like
friendship group, like dwindlesdown because you realize, you.
(13:58):
Part your friends are just like,just that they're just potty
friends.
And I had a good group of likepeople around me still, but it
wasn't enough to keep me that.
And it also language barrier.
I'm sorry, I just was nevergoing to learn German.
It's just not an attractivelanguage.
You've seen those videos.
Haven't you of the, like thepeople compare like beautiful
(14:19):
words in different languages.
It's like ambulance in English.
And then in French, it's likeample.
And then in Spanish it's like,um, And then in German, it's
con.
Butterfly.
why.
And tha.
(14:42):
What's the, what's the word fora queue?
Like a line they call it, Oh,it's translated to waiting snake
out the waiting snake.
But do you remember how topronounce it?
No, I just thought just slungit.
Is that the word.
My favorite thing is that thebirth control pill is called
anti baby pill, and I love agood anti baby pill.
(15:03):
So cute.
Hey, one 90, maybe Belinda,please.
But in no world, would I want tolearn that language and speak it
fluently?
I'm sorry.
No.
I'm sorry.
No, sorry.
But yeah.
Okay.
People do.
And I have so many friends thatare still that and like good for
that.
I think it's a bit crazy aboutgood for that.
And I personally, I was like, Iwant to move to a place where I
(15:23):
can like a, speak a languageagain.
Like I forgot how easy that wasto get a job I actually enjoyed.
And then, progressing some sortof career path that was
creative.
Creative cause I was just like,ah, fucking desk every day.
typing behind a fucking keyboardspeaking to the most dull
people, it was just such a bore.
It was like Berlin was fun inthe summer months.
And then the rest of my life, itjust seems so mundane.
(15:45):
All of a sudden I was just onthe train for an hour and a half
commuting every single day backand forth.
And I was like, what the fuck isthis?
Both the fuck is the point.
What did I move this whole?
Did I move here for, I likemoved here to have a fun life.
And I just, like, all of asudden was like in the, like the
rat race, the Berlin rat race,which is a really shitty, sad,
little rat race to be in.
(16:06):
I might say.
And then I was like, okay, letme look for different options.
So Commonwealth visa wise, I waslike, either are moving to New
Zealand or I'm moving to Canada.
And I was like, okay, fine.
Kind of just a little bit closeas, let me just move to Canada.
I was applying for my visa.
At the beginning of the summerof 2017.
Pride was happening.
(16:27):
My best friend Lexi came tovisit me from the UK.
We had like grand old gay time.
And then a week later.
No, I'm not even a week later,she left me on the Monday.
Yeah, it was Monday.
She left me on the Monday afterpride and then you messaged me
on Grindr.
It was like a Tuesday evening.
I was watching game of Thrones.
(16:47):
In my little room.
Oh, my fucking bedroom.
And Bellin was so nice.
It was full hundred.
It was 450 Euro and it was afucking huge.
Yeah, it was so big.
I know.
I left that bedroom.
I was the best.
It was the best thought uponwhat was so nice.
It was so cheap.
I'm sat, minding my ownbusiness.
Watching game of Thrones.
And I decided to open mygrinder, just.
(17:10):
To have a chat.
See who's around just to grind.
Grind.
It was their intention.
I just want it to like chart.
And I wanted to chat.
He messaged me on Grindr.
How did you say you up?
No.
From my perspective, I'm notactually watching game of
Thrones and you're like,messaging me like, Hey, Heats
and repairs.
(17:30):
Hey, what's up.
I don't know what theconversation was about, but it
was like very, Hey, like howyou, and let me like, great, how
are you?
What are you up to?
And then I like check hisprofile and I was like, He's
nice to keep.
This is really what did youactually say?
So embarrassing a little bit.
Oh, my God.
I remember seeing your photos.
(17:51):
And it was like, you'reactually, you look so cool.
Cause you have like you're onInstagram then you think you had
20,000 followers or something atthis point I was in the early
stages.
Instagram.
I thought that was like, cool.
It was so cool.
And you had these I don't know,in 20 16, 20 17 standards, like
really cool photos.
If you was to look at them rightnow, you think he was.
Fucking loser.
Disgusting.
And I was like, oh my God, thisguy's so hot.
(18:14):
and then at the same, at thetime to actually I think I just
decreased my age limit on it.
Cause I think I had very strict.
Two year younger limits.
On Grindr.
Yeah.
And then I think I moved it too,because I think you're like, you
knew you were like two years andtwo months younger than me.
And so I think I changed it tothree.
I was like, I'm 20.
(18:35):
How old?
I just tend to about, yeah, 25.
I think I turned that year.
And so you were 22 turning 23that year.
And I was like, let me let mejust broaden my fucking horizons
because everyone's a fuckinglame, unlike us, you knew there
was someone.
And people on Grindr or it wasjust like, I think I'd reached a
point.
I was like partying with myfriends and I was like, let me
hook up a bit.
Let me just enjoy.
My life, actually, the reason Idownloaded Grindr for the first
(18:57):
time, like around pride month.
And then cause pride in Berlinis July.
And I downloaded it and I waslike, let me be a slut.
Let me be a slut for a second.
And then I like, did it feellike, okay, I think I had it for
a week.
And I slithered on him.
One guy.
I like went to some guy's house.
His name was redacted.
And he w he was so strange.
(19:19):
He was like, so odd.
And I was like, this cannot bethe pool.
I've of humans I'm working with.
Let me like expand my reachslightly.
And so I did, and I was like, Iwas fully in the mindset that I
was like, I want to be a slotfor a little while.
And then you slid into my DMS.
We met weekly.
And I literally like here weare.
As I added the fuck was the,what the fuck was that?
(19:42):
You were literally out of oneweek of being a slut and then I
put a ring on it, basically.
I'm Laura saying.
Yeah, stick to my fucking guns.
Then how did we actually meet.
I do love telling the story.
Okay.
It's summer.
Remember?
This summer in July.
Slot summer slots.
It was supposed to be supposedlyslot summer, ended up being
fucking, put a ring on itsummer.
(20:05):
And he was messaging me onGrindr that Tuesday we talked
about nothing, but game ofThrones for a full week, we just
tried shit.
Like it was so PG.
It was actually embarrassing.
Yeah, it was like very baby.
How are you?
And oh yeah.
Good.
Thank you.
How.
Did you have lunch today?
We're like, what the fuck are wedoing?
All of a sudden we were this oldmarried couple, like we hadn't
(20:25):
even met yet.
And the following weekend Inever, ever in my life at that
time would have ever gone to thegym on a weekend.
But something inside mecompelled me.
To get my ass out of bed and goto the gym on a Saturday.
Call it kismet.
Shut the fuck up.
Don't you use my languageagainst me here.
(20:47):
I decided.
Because I was there cause I alsowent to the gym on that fated
Saturday.
I got to the gym and we're thebench next to each other.
Do you remember, did you everthat there was like a pillar in
between us.
We were like dying.
And it was like on a corner andthere was a pillar in between,
and then two benches, likefacing separate mirrors.
So we could see each other outof the corner of our eyes, see
you on your adjacent mirror.
(21:08):
And you could see me on myadjuster.
And I was like, oh, this guy'sreally hot.
And I was like, this looks likethe person I'm speaking to on
Grindr, but like he's in person.
So like he looks differentobviously.
Cause.
People do they look different?
Also you fucking photos with, sonow, like truly looking back on
it, I can say this with hand onmy heart.
Like with my full chest and saythere were so fucking lame.
(21:28):
Like you did the full 2016, liketravel blogger, like Shanghai.
Yeah, the table was really cool,but I was like, you were being
so like moody and mysterious andit was like, is this is this the
same guy that's next to me rightnow.
I kept trying to make eyecontact with him.
And he like.
just wouldn't look in mydirection.
And I was like, he's either sofucking rude and so obnoxious,
(21:48):
or it's not him.
And so I guess the third option.
Little did I know it was asecret.
Third option.
He just wouldn't look at me.
And I went to another machineand we were doing like chest,
I'm not chest.
Sorry.
We were doing row was the cablerows on actually adjacent
machines that I was facing him.
(22:09):
He was facing me diagonally toeach other.
He still wouldn't look at me andhe was being so weird and I was
like, okay, but he's definitelynot the same person or he's
being a con.
And, Yeah, it was a secret thirdoption.
He messaged me on Grindr andsaid, Hey, are you in the gym?
Hey, are you in the gym?
I said, Hey, smiley face.
Could you maybe perhaps be inthe gym and he's like right
(22:31):
beside of me.
He's actually left and went tothe other.
The same amount of space as youare right now on this podcast.
Then you were on the bench.
You mentioned, I think gumption,I didn't have gumption.
Then I was very shy.
I was, I'm a Virgo and I am notas shy as I was back then.
I was a very Virgo back then.
And now I would actually talk toyou in the gym.
It's actually know your.
(22:52):
Too hot.
oh, my.
If I saw you in the gym today, Iwould not.
You're intimidating.
Really?
You also have a resting bitchface when you.
I have a resting bitch face metoo, but also like, you know,
you see, I feel like I look moreintimidating that I'm like, I
don't oh, totally.
I don't really walk aroundsmiling.
(23:13):
Cause what's the, what such asmile about.
What do you mean?
What is that to smile about?
I mean, lots.
I'll shut up.
Ah, shucks.
Well, I could name.
Not shucks.
Anyway, he messaged me on Grindrand I, in my mind, I'm like, if
he leaves the gym and we don'tspeak.
I'm never going to speak to thisperson ever again.
(23:35):
But we were so close to me.
I was like, this is such anembarrassing move because why
would you not just say hello?
I think I.
I would really valued likeconfidence and like, you know,
gumption to like, you know, Getup and like, You know, Just grab
what you want.
Grab by the ball.
Life by the bowls.
And, I could see him like he wasfrom in one room about to leave
(23:57):
and go to leave, like leave.
Going to leave the gym.
I was done with my workout.
I was leaving the gym.
And I said it's now whenever Igot up off of the attic with the
equipment and that was on and Iturned him around.
I like went to the exit towardsthe exec.
And grabbed his shoulder andturned him around and I was
like, oh, hi.
And he was so sweet and he got.
You got so like rad.
(24:18):
I could tell he was like, soembarrassed.
I was like, we were just bothlike at the gym suit, we were
like sweaty.
Anyway.
And like I could tell he waslike really flushed.
And I was like, hi, it's melike, blah, blah, blah.
And we were like chatting for asecond.
And then there'd be exchangenumbers, or like we had
exchanged numbers on Grindr.
We had already exchangednumbers.
I think we were talking onWhatsApp at that point and then
no.
Oh, my God.
What.
(24:39):
You gave me a number on WhatsAppand I messaged you on WhatsApp.
Oh, yeah.
And then I was like, that'sreally rude.
Oh yeah.
I messaged.
That morning.
On WhatsApp and then, cause Ithink he thought I was someone
else.
Yeah.
I thought you were like somerandom person.
I thought you were a person fromthe organization I used to work
with in college.
And that's why I was like, whywould I respond to this?
Why would that person text you?
(25:00):
I don't know.
And then I realize I'm alsoOmar.
No, there wasn't actually aperson.
I just thought it was a randomperson.
I didn't think I realized that.
It's Omar.
I didn't realize who it was.
I think in my mind, I just didnot connect.
So it took me like a day torespond.
I think I might've messaged youon like the Friday night and
then in the morning, you stillhadn't responded?
And it was like, that's reallyrude because you'd given me your
number by this point.
(25:20):
And I was like, I'm going to,I'm going to text you on
WhatsApp now.
And, that I was like, I also, Iwas like, I texted you on
WhatsApp.
And he was like, oh, I didn'tknow.
That was you.
Yes.
Yes.
Let this be a lesson, a lifelesson, folks.
Chase after your dreams anddesires.
And, also chase men across thegym.
(25:42):
Chase man, across the genetics.
Ray Moto chase men across thegym.
Get some gumption.
God damn it.
I have gumption now.
Yeah.
Okay.
I have gumption now.
So we were talking about ourfirst date or what we wanted to
do.
We were going to hang out twodays later from that time.
I think it was Monday that wehung out.
I remember I think that was sadand you're like, what are you
doing tonight?
And I was like, oh, I'll havethis party in this like
(26:03):
abandoned building.
And you were like, whoa.
I'm not cool enough.
I remember you were like, whatthe fuck is this person?
I was like, I'm here to tell.
I'm going to this like randomrave at this, abandoned in this
abandoned building, near myneighborhood with this, like one
of my like artist friends, andlike one of his dumb fucking
friends who were fucking lowwith it at the time, but I was
like, there'll be funny.
(26:24):
I'll be a funny night out.
We were that to 7:00 AM.
I'm walking home at 7:00 AM.
And I was like texting yousuggested hanging out that
night, but then you had thisrave.
And we were like okay.
Okay.
Let's organize for Monday.
We said like Monday let's do alot.
I'm sorry, I'm not giving you aSaturday.
Don't be silly.
We did a Monday date, short,whatever.
And I was like, I would like to,yeah.
What was my suggestion?
You suggested the date first andit was a bad suggestion.
(26:48):
I think this is a fuckingexcellent suggestion.
If you know anything aboutBerlin, In Prenzlauer Berg,
there is a wine bar it's calleddiva.
And I, the winery.
On the weekdays, you can go andthey do wine tastings.
This is the actual thing thatthey do.
Did you wine tastings and youcan pay at the end of your like
evening, how much you think thenight was worth.
(27:09):
or like you donate.
Basically how much you drank.
I was poor, so I would go andget shit face and then give a
couple of Euro and be like, woo.
What aren't cheap.
What a cheap knife.
That's so fun.
I was like, let's do this.
Let's go to this wine bar, getshit faced.
It will be so fun.
It would be so cheap.
And it's a really fun thing todo on a Monday night, not as a
first day.
And then you will like.
(27:29):
It's really nice in one that'sgot to the park.
Yeah.
Cause it was a beautiful Julyevening or afternoon.
And I was like, let's just go tothe park, hang out, have a
couple beers.
Yeah.
I bought bears.
I bring any wireless you tobring anything.
I'm sorry.
No, you were a little shit,actually.
I stopped at the shop on theway.
(27:50):
Let's go to the park.
And I was like, ah, Grudgingly.
I was like, fine.
I was like, I really want to go.
It's a Monday night.
I want to get shit faced.
Yeah.
My favorite wine bar on a Mondaynight.
To yarrow or you can go to thepark and sit with a nice boy and
have a couple Rattlers.
Rattlers.
(28:11):
Yeah.
And that's what we did,honestly, in hindsight, if we
had gone to the winery, thatnight.
I don't think we would be hereright now.
No, I would have seen theGemini.
No, it would have been, I wouldhave been fun.
You would have had such a goodtime for sure.
But I don't think we would be inthe same.
It's not the same vibe.
Yeah.
Because what ended up happeningwas I got on my little bike.
(28:32):
I rode my bike.
Did you?
You're going to cancel.
You told me like, yeah.
Probably nervous.
I thought you were so hot.
I thought you were so attractiveand cool.
And I was so overwhelmed andthought you were out of my
league.
Definitely.
So I was like, I'm sick.
Oh, yeah, no, you didn't though,because if you did literally
(28:53):
wouldn't be here.
So I took the SPN and I got overmy fucking nerves.
Cause I was a little piece ofshit shy boy.
And I got over there and then Imet you at the park.
Yeah.
It was like, I was waiting atthe entrance because I got that.
Uncharacteristically early on mybicycle.
So cool.
Cause you had a little light,you had one of your colorful
shirts wrapped around your waistand you had a tank top on I was
like, whoa, who.
Was this crazy guy and yet allhis jewelry and tattoos.
(29:15):
And I was like what.
And then I had my bike and thenin my life, Tote bag of like
beers and I had no tattoos.
Rolling cigarettes by.
I was like probably rolling acigarette and I look like a
loser.
I'm pretty sure.
No, you came, you rang like acap, you rang like a baseball
cap and you had a thing you hadlike a t-shirt on.
I just looked like a good oldAmerican boy.
Yeah.
(29:35):
Yeah, he looked very like cleancut.
Great.
Which at the time was really mytype for some fucking reason.
We've we've grown.
We've uh, Um, So we sat at thepark.
We just had to go.
The whole spot.
Yeah.
The little hill at mal park inthe Bentley.
Lately in our neighborhood.
And.
It was like five or five day.
(29:56):
And then we like.
Sorry.
And just talked and all of asudden 10.
10 hours.
Nope.
Nope.
Nope.
All of a sudden it was 10:00 PM.
Like all of a sudden, like thetime had just flown by, we
didn't know, it was decideduntil the mosquitoes came out
and we were like, oh my God.
Look at the time.
It's crazy.
I'm itching.
(30:17):
Oh, this is crazy.
Like we should go.
Cause we talked about everythingunder the sun.
We talked about everything.
I feel like we hit every singletopic.
We really did like, like, do youwant to have kids?
We said, no, not so much.
Do you want to have.
I don't know, but that was atopic of conversation.
what.
I don't think we were like, whatare your thoughts on kids?
eventually we were like talkingabout.
(30:38):
We're talking about familystuff.
Families are like.
And stuff.
I was like, oh my God.
Luckily never, you were likenever, I know it was like
perfect walk.
Let's lock in.
Perfect.
We also connected.
Deeply, unlike the fact that weboth grew up in really religious
families on different sides ofthe world.
I just had very similarexperiences, but just like
under.
(30:58):
The scrutiny and.
Of separate religions and justlike typical first queer date.
Yeah.
Childhood trauma dumping.
Bonding gorgeous.
And then, yeah, we like walkedover.
I walked him to the station.
I was like, let me take you tothe train station so that you
(31:19):
can go home and then I cancontinue on my bicycle to my
house.
And then we were walking by thischicken shop, reset chicken on
the corner of episodic.
Straza.
Rosa Ali.
And I was like, by the way, thatis like the best chicken shop,
like in the world.
Like it was, you know, thefluorescent lights were on, the
sun had just sat.
(31:39):
And I was like, by the way, thatis the best chicken chocolate,
the world.
And you were like, I'm fromthere.
I'm from North Carolina.
I'll be the judge of that.
I don't know why you soundedlike courage.
The cowardly.
The dog grandfather in.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Your Southern accent is not thebest.
I'm just, I'm not actuallytrying to imitate you.
I'm trying to bully you.
Great.
And I said, I know what friedchicken is let's go in and I'll
(32:01):
tell you.
So we got in, had the fightordered the fried chicken.
It wasn't even, it's not evenfried.
I wouldn't call it friedchicken.
It's just like it was chickenthat was fried.
So it's fried chicken, chickentenders.
I guess you could get the.
Like drumsticks.
You could get like a wholechicken, but like it's just
chicken tenders.
No.
What was all of that?
A.
it's we'll do.
(32:21):
I'll do.
This is why a one bitter.
Connie kind of each Hoben Zvi.
Ah, I petitioned Dunka.
So we got those and I tried itand it was great.
Yeah, it was great if I checkedand I was good looking back on
it, we have had it again.
It's not the best fried chicken.
(32:41):
Shut the fuck up.
But it's the memory that countsand it was us having fried
chicken.
Nice.
Yes.
It's while nice.
We had fried chicken on herfirst day.
It's so cute.
So cute.
It's unintentional friedchicken, which makes it bad
because intentional friedchicken was B would be like a
little bit.
A little bit Trashman.
Imagine my suggestion was to goget fried chicken.
They're like a wine bar.
(33:02):
Yeah.
Fried chicken.
We went from bureaus and friedchicken.
That's crazy, which honestly,like it fits.
Honestly, Honestly.
We've walked.
Then I walked into this trainstation and then.
Now that we're underneath theflickering lights of shin house.
Les Bon station.
He plants.
One on me.
I gave him a little pecker, lowpecker.
Pecker.
(33:26):
Put your packer or your Peteraway.
This is the first day.
Fuck.
Peanut freak.
I gave him a pack on the lips.
And my, I don't know why.
The fuck came over me.
I was like, She couldn't breath.
It was so stupid.
I was like, this would be sofunny to say.
And I said, oh my God, chickenbreasts.
(33:48):
Cause it was funny.
Like it literally just tastedlike fried chicken.
Yeah.
And then, I dunno, I think hethought I was so funny.
Yeah, charming.
Yeah, we both giggled and thenhe went on his Merry way.
Took the train one stop.
He could have walked, please.
He shit.
Oh, yeah.
I coulda, I don't know.
She shouldn't have the alley toPrenzlauer alley train station
is on 10 minute walk.
And then we saw each other everysingle day for a month.
(34:11):
Isn't that nice.
There was a day we like keptseeing each other every day.
Like we kept doing dates andlike Hangouts and like whatever.
There was a day that you weregoing to go to work.
You were going to go to workfrom your house.
And then there was it's like youhad something afterwards or you
you didn't have time to see methat day.
So you came over in the morningbefore you went to work and you
said hi so that you didn't breakour street.
(34:32):
Yeah, I think we had a straighthallway, so cute.
So cute.
No, it's so cute.
That's disgusting.
It's not our podcast now.
Did you know why it's soembarrassing?
I was a different person than Iwould never know.
It was sweet.
Really cute.
It was so cute.
I hate everything.
That's not true.
(34:53):
You pretend that you have a hardshell.
But you don't use that voice.
Don't use that voice with thepublic.
With the public listening.
I, yeah, I did that.
I did that.
I thought it was so cute.
Yeah, you were, no, in my mind,I was like, I think you were
busy.
You we had something.
I was a big influencer back inthe day.
Oh, please.
(35:13):
And don't tell I was.
I was the cream of the crop.
We want to do a career.
Korea episode.
Yeah.
Like the stupid jobs that we'veworked are so funny.
I was doing what he was doingfor work at the time is like
truly the most dumb thing I'veever heard anyone ever do.
Next episode, for sure.
Sure.
I remember one thing vividlyabout living in.
But you didn't have that manyfriends cause you like didn't
(35:34):
have a workplace to go to.
I was self-employed.
Yeah.
So you like found a bunch oflike random content creators.
If you know anything aboutGerman influences, my God.
They are insufferable.
You think where.
Inseparable.
We're in sufferable oh my God.
Throw a German.
my fucking Christ.
All mine got, oh my God.
(35:55):
It was so crazy.
I would meet these people on Istarted going to like events,
like influencer events with him.
And I was like, this is such acool and crazy life.
What the fuck?
I didn't meet all these weirdos.
And then like he would meet myfriends and I had a billion
friends in Berlin at this pointthat I'd been there for a year
and a half by this point.
And I was at come into like myfriends cycle.
(36:16):
Cause they were like a lot morenormal.
Relatively.
Okay.
Then the majority.
We're a little bit insane.
But yeah, I was like, let meintroduce you to like actually
normal people.
And I feel like.
Really reached a point in Berlinwhere I was like, oh, I feel
like life is so nice now.
But then I was like, I.
With we just started dating andI was like, I'm already applying
(36:37):
for my visa for Canada, by theway, just so you know.
Because, you know why you don'tmind.
That do you know why?
I decided, like I already knew Iwanted to, and then there was
one moment.
I think it was like June thatyear.
Like bright before we met, I waslike, I was so sick.
And then I went into the little.
Underneath, like my building.
(36:58):
I was so ill and I was like,counting my change.
And I was like being reallyslow.
Cause I was just like, oh, wesuck so feeble.
And oh my God, I just have feltso ill.
And I'm trying to get my grocerysupplies so I can go upstairs
and have a little fucking soupor something.
And the fucking Cassia, SLAM's ahand.
On the count and she's actually,yeah.
Which means.
(37:19):
I don't know, it was like, fuckyou.
Uh, it was really hard to countmy fucking, your rose.
This is when you decided to.
I went upstairs and I was like,let me submit my application.
You can't.
you told me that you wereleaving and I had already had an
extended visa application.
I was planning on extending myvisa.
Because I realized by thatpoint, you, this six months,
there's.
Was up There was some wiggleroom.
(37:39):
I had my application in.
You were in Eagle?
No.
I had my apple.
You were an illegal, you're anillegal you weren't illegal.
Wow.
How the turntables turn.
I now know I had my applicationin to extend my visa in Germany.
Like I was going to like thefucking, oh, it was a place.
If you know anything aboutGermany, paperwork in Germany.
the amped called.
Burger around the boat grant islike the registration.
(38:01):
But like the visa one is a veryspecific.
The scary ones you have to getthere.
I'd five, eight.
Yeah.
To.
Oh my God.
If you know anything about likeGerman bureaucracy, like you
have to register.
These like burger MCs, likeregistration offices.
And the people who work that arelike, it's just like a billion,
carbon copies of Roz frommonsters Inc.
They literally standing thereI'm watching you.
(38:25):
but in German.
Yeah.
But is that I couldn't evenbudget.
You mentioned watching monsterthinking German.
I don't know.
Horrible.
Disgusting.
Gross.
I was still working my visa.
And then you told me that youwere moving and I was like,
Yeah, I don't really like hereeither.
So let's move to Canada becauseit was also easy for me to get a
visa for Canada.
Yeah.
If you think about it though,like pots crazy that you were
(38:46):
like, I think we'd been datingfor I don't know, a couple
months by this point when youwill also like, I'm also going
to move, but intentionally, likewe weren't intentioned, we
weren't intentionally planningon moving together.
I was like, I'm moving you move.
No, but I knew that I didn'tlike Germany, so I was like, I
want to move somewhere else.
And I don't want to move back tothe us.
Cause I was still in mytraveling era.
I was like, let's experience theworld.
(39:06):
Over that.
So I wanted to put together.
So then I moved to, they movedto Canada.
You're talking about, we travelall the time.
No, I know, but not like livingplaces, I don't want to live in
any other countries.
Yeah, I'm done with that.
Maybe in the far future.
I'm living in the United Statesof America for now, until it
falls.
So you came to the table to hearabout how we met.
(39:27):
And you did.
And you learn.
Now, Now, you know?
yeah.
And if you ever repeat any ofthe mushy gushy stuff that I've
ever done ever again, I'm goingto fucking beat the shit out of
you.
The truth of the matter is year.
I'm not, you are.
You are.
You are and don't you let.
I just want to forget it.
(39:49):
We're pretty.
Down memory lane.
Almost eight.
You remember the fragrance wherewe saw.
Now that we've just finished theepisode, I'm gonna.
But we actually should smell itagain.
We went to a lush event in Idunno, maybe the first couple of
months he started dating.
And they like have this likelimited edition fragrance
launch.
And we each took a differentfragrance home each and we just
(40:12):
wore them through the firstcouple months of dating and we
still have the bottles andthey're both empty, but they
still smell.
Because the frigates was sostrong, it was very like
cinnamony, like earthy.
Smells.
And, they don't do them anymoretoday.
No, but they was so like everytime, like I get the ball out,
smell it.
It literally like smells reallydo.
Bring you, right?
(40:33):
Oh, it brings me right back to.
That summer and Berlin.
Yeah.
And reminds me of you.
It's crazy.
As I, as soon as I smell it,memories, flood back, I'm like
watching my life, go behind my,go back.
What flashed by.
Slash behind.
What lash in front of your eyes?
Behind watching my life flashedin front of my eyes flash before
(40:53):
your eyes.
Fucking out.
Behind your eyes.
In between I said, in betweenyour eyes, between your.
No, he's not that.
And then it's everything, allthe memories come back and it's
really cute.
Ah, You know, What else is cute?
Fucking did a table game.
Yeah.
That's.
We're about to play right now.
(41:14):
Would you rather.
We have been to so many placestogether.
I traveled far and wide.
Would you rather.
B.
Living in Berlin.
Okay.
Still.
Okay.
But together.
Yeah.
Okay.
Um, Should we have the sameincome that we have?
Right now.
Yeah.
Or back then?
No, now.
(41:34):
Now.
Oh, now fuck not back then.
Life would be great if we livein Berlin right now, it'd be.
Oh, we were poor, but oh my God,poverty.
Did you hear about me countingmy fucking, my euros little.
Grounding for my 25 cents.
I'd rather be living in Berlinright now, still with the same
income that I have right now.
Same income that you have rightnow or.
(41:56):
Living in.
Canada.
Oh, living in Toronto.
Living in Toronto.
Toronto really?
Yeah.
I think it's Toronto.
I got crazy, mostly because Iwant access to the United
States.
Oh, I love America.
I want to be close to here.
I feel like I would enjoy it.
No, I think I'd say by then.
(42:16):
Cause I feel like.
I'd prefer the, if I had theincome, like that was a one big
thing.
Like you don't get paid shit.
Sure.
But I've done the Europe shit.
I've done the.
Shit.
I've.
I've done.
I've done it.
I've been there so many times.
I've lived there so much.
I've been around.
Yeah, that's true.
I've got so much more of thisside of the world to do.
And Asia.
(42:38):
Well, It wasn't one of my bigpet peeves.
I know.
We'll say like, oh yeah, we did.
We did Thailand.
we did Spain this summer.
I have so much of this side ofthe world, Asia to see.
And experience it.
So I'd rather do that one of mybest friends lives in Belden.
So I'd love to move back toBerlin.
one of my best friends living inToronto.
Wait, then they're listening to,sorry.
(42:59):
I love you guys.
Let me you all equally, whatwould you do?
You.
Do Berlin for sure.
I think.
Yeah.
Okay.
We're splitting up then.
I'm living in Toronto.
Fuck.
You know what, that's, how wemet them.
This is how we break up.
And thank you so much forlistening.
And that's a decade of.
Almost a decade.
I know, almost a decade, 10years.
It's not even eight yet.
(43:20):
I know it's seven and a half sofar.
I know, but it's not, it'salmost.
Let's not get ahead ofourselves.
Let's see, we'll see if we makeit that far.
Yes.
Thanks for digging in with ustoday.
We really appreciate it verymuch.
So.
Um, Clean up after yourself asyou leave.
And don't let the door.
Hi.
(43:40):
Where the good Lord.
I think that's so funny.
I love that.
I love that one.
The biggest Doug Dodd joke ever.
Why don't you say it more often?
So good.
Because I don't hate people thatmuch.
Do you hate our listeners?
No.
Don't let the door hit youweathered.
The good Lord's blessed.
So funny.
It's just a good one.
That's a good one.
That's dumb.
Don't forget to rate us whereveryou listen to your podcasts.
(44:00):
Watch us on YouTube.
Follow us on Instagram, Tik TOK.
And we'll see you next time.
Goodbye or should we say.
Choosy.
I'll feed the sane.
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