October 15, 2025 • 61 mins
We read MJ’s letter about paying his way through bad dates in the U.S., then weighing a flood of attention from Filipino Cupid. We share hard-won rules for vetting abroad, spending smart, spotting red flags, and choosing a path that protects your heart and your wallet.
• why money-led dating backfires and how to set pace
• how to vet online matches with simple, consistent checks
• practical safety tips for Cebu travel and meetups
• cultural context in the Philippines and family expectations
• red flags: visa talk, gift-for-intimacy, story gaps
• green flags: steady contact, no asks, public meets
• budgeting rules: cards over cash, hotel safe, daily caps
• choosing depth over volume and building a shortlist
• boundaries with family support vs long-term obligations
• planning for honesty about kids, commitment, and timeline
Episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow on Amazon, Spotify, iTunes, and YouTube. Email your letters to d6mpire357@gmail.com. Find us on IG and TikTok @IamIcon.
https://www.instagram.com/d6empire357
https://www.instagram.com/thaicon357
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (02:16):
Well, you're in his mind, a man that is admired,
fun, compassionate,understanding, and very
sarcastic.
But hey, that's who he is.
The advice can either be good ormisunderstood, but he does
become experienced.
So stick back, listen up, volumeup, and let's talk about it.
SPEAKER_02 (04:29):
Before we get started.
(05:08):
Sometimes you just gotta letthat groove.
We don't get started here.
Oh man, you gotta love days likethis, right?
Sit back, chill.
Yes, yes.
Alright, well, how's everybodydoing out there?
Everybody, we doing alright, wedoing good.
(05:28):
Yes, yes, here we go.
I'm the icon.
Welcome to the show.
The show is called Let's TalkAbout It.
We're here.
We have letters from just randompeople who just want my advice
or opinions on any andeverything they sent to me.
I'm not a licensed therapist.
(05:49):
I sometimes give good advice, orjust sometimes I just give
advice.
So if you follow me, you knowthat you can stream my podcast
anywhere you stream podcastsAmazon, Spotify, iTunes,
YouTube.
You can follow me on TikTok, IG,for the most part.
Here we go.
(06:10):
Let's get started, shall we?
Hope everybody's having a greatday today, because I'm having a
fantastic day.
Oh man, you gotta love that.
Love the vibes.
That's all good though.
In any event.
I have a letter here from Mr.
Mike J.
(06:32):
Hold on, notifications goingoff.
Uh Mr.
Mike J or BKA MJ.
So, without further ado, here wego.
Let's get this started, shallwe?
Icon.
(06:53):
My name is Mike J.
I don't really know your show,but a friend of mine listens and
it seems and he seems to enjoyyour content.
So I figured what the hell?
He turned me on to your show,and I listened to about one of
your episodes about having along distance relationship and
decided to give it a try.
So here's my problem.
(07:14):
My relationship here in the USis just bad, and I think it's
because I have too much to offerin terms of money, and not other
things that come with therelationship.
I've dated white women, blackwomen, Mexican women, I've even
dated an Indian woman.
Yes, all are different in a way,but most have one thing in
common, and that's money.
(07:36):
I give them gifts or I share orI give them money or I share
them with gifts.
But not none of them have thepleasure of relations or given
me the satisfaction of pleasure.
Well the Ebony chick almosttossed it up to me, but she said
she had to call her sitter andshe had to go home.
Come to find out, weeks later,she didn't even have a kid.
(07:56):
I later spoke with her about twoweeks ago, and she had told me
that she just found out that shewas gay.
Awkward.
I was like WTF.
But the funny thing is the guyshe was with clearly clearly is
her dude and introduced me as avalet guy.
But get this.
I seen her at a freakingMcDonald's, and who in the hell
(08:19):
does valet at a McDonald's?
Nobody I know unless you're inan upscale part of town, but
that's neither here nor there,because I don't get out much.
But I let her ride becauseclearly she's not worth it.
And after that, I decided totake a break.
So two days later, I found abeautiful white woman.
You took a break for two damndays, and you found a beautiful
white woman.
SPEAKER_01 (08:38):
Okay, that's good.
It's good.
SPEAKER_02 (08:39):
Who I thought was a one for me, but it turns out she
just wanted the bag.
Then the bag in most cases meansthe money.
She wanted the money.
Again, we went on a few dates.
I took her shopping in anupscale clothing store, Target
and Macy's.
If anybody thinks Target isupscale, you own something, but
whatever, it is what it is.
(09:00):
I spent about two grand.
God damn, I guess you couldspend that about Macy's.
I can see, but Target, eh, maybewho knows.
Anyways, Target is more of anupscaler uh retail store,
upscale from Walmart, butWalmart is my upscale retail
store.
Anyways, I spent two grand, fastforward to the night in
(09:22):
question, and I was like, WTF,not again.
But her excuse was I'm on mymonthly, so of course I didn't
believe her, and I said, Let mesee.
That's kind of disgustingbecause if a woman tells me that
she's on her monthly, I don'tneed to see any proof.
I'm good.
She got mad, stormed out, tookeverything I bought her with
(09:42):
her, and I didn't see her till amonth later, and that didn't go
well.
Let's just say I now have to goto court on a restraining order.
Damn, Icon, I didn't even doanything wrong.
I got mad, I lost my temper, butI would never hit a woman.
That's a good thing.
Needless to say, that I went tocourt and the restraining order
got tossed.
(10:03):
Thank God.
I just wanted to find love.
I want to be happy.
So I've done what you've done.
So, wait, I have done whatyou've done.
Before writing this letter, Iwent on a site called Filipino
Cupid.
And let me say, I think it'slike hitting the lottery.
And it kind of seemsoverwhelming, I can tell you
that.
(10:23):
Once I registered, paid themonthly fee, the DMs was like
women at an Usher concert.
Yeah, I don't I've never been toan Usher concert, but I I take
your word for it.
I felt so alive.
I started to feel better aboutmyself again.
I had so many to choose from.
At one point, I started thinkingthat I was just a chosen one.
Like and I and I feel howcelebrity feels when he or she
(10:45):
meets fans.
SPEAKER_01 (10:46):
Well, I don't know.
I don't know, but it's it'sgood, it's good, it's good.
SPEAKER_02 (10:52):
I must have met and chatted over 20 women from the
Philippines, and the DMs justkeeps going.
It's like scrolling on IG thatdoesn't stop.
Yeah, that is true.
So my question is for youbecause I like what I'm seeing,
and I like, and I feel likethere's some real connections,
but I'm so elated on what to doand having to talk to my
parents.
And they said that I should justkeep looking in the states, and
(11:14):
it doesn't matter how long ittakes as long as I find a woman
in America.
They said the Philippines womenare not loyal.
I beg a different, but whatever.
Um, so I understand you dated awoman from the Philippines, and
I wanted to know how that'sworking for you because next
summer I'm going to Cebu to meeta few of them, and I've had the
(11:36):
pleasure of chatting with.
This is new for me, but it feelsright.
My mom has also turned me ontothe site about women in the
Philippines called Smart GirlPhilippines.
We'll get into that later.
But I have to say, most of theircontent seems to talk down about
the women uh there, like they'reall bad, and that and I that I
should look elsewhere.
(11:59):
But I don't want to because theattention I'm getting, plus the
ones that care are so genuine.
So, in your experience, what isyour advice to me?
Because I want to be the bestand I want to be a better
version of me, and I'm honestlyjust so tired of being lonely.
Signed MJ.
(12:19):
So, this is a letter from MJ,who is clearly feeling the heat
or the pressure of dating womenin the US, and and I talk about
in one of my um episodes thatthe reasons why I don't date
American women, it doesn'tmatter um that you're a
(12:39):
different ethnicity or ethnicculture.
Doesn't matter if you're white,black, Asian, Mexican, whatever.
If you were born here inAmerica, uh to me, you have been
somewhat Americanized by theculture and you have adapted to
the culture because dating wasnothing like what it was back in
my day.
(13:00):
Back in my day, you couldapproach a woman and they would
give you the time of day andthey would speak to you, and
then they would probably say,let's, and then and you could
probably ask them out on a date.
Now, in today's culture andsociety, that somehow is just
not like that.
And I'm not saying there's a lotof bad women in the US, it is
(13:21):
just hard to find a woman in theUS.
So, after my wife died, as Isaid before, I went through
therapy.
I my therapist was even tellingme to I should get out and try
to um date more, but I didn't Iwasn't ready to date, so I just
(13:42):
wanted friends.
And like I said before, thewomen that I approached upon
that, it was just not a good, itwas just not good.
You know, one lady I held thedoor open for, and I catch up, I
didn't say anything to her, Ijust said that um have a good
day.
And she said, Well, I got a man.
I said, Okay, I didn't sayanything.
I said, I got a man, okay.
You got a man.
(14:02):
I didn't even ask for anything.
So on that part, I understand.
I have gone on a date aftermaybe after my wife passed away,
not right directly after, butand it just was not what I was
looking for.
You know, I am not a rich man, Iam an average, um average male.
(14:25):
I work two jobs, I take care ofmy kids, I love my kids, I love
my family.
Now, in today's society, thewomen that I have come across,
and this is no shade towards anywoman ever.
I just feel that if I'm tryingto provide you genuine or be
(14:45):
genuine for you, I'm not tryingto be something that I'm not
because I'm not gonna besomething I'm not.
I'm not gonna try to have, I'mnot gonna tell you that I can
promise you this thing, but I doanother.
I'm not gonna show you theflash, and I'm not going to try
to make you appease, uh, makeyou appeal to my better nature.
So basically, I'm not gonna tellyou that I can do all these
stuff, I can do all this stufffor you, and I know I can't.
(15:07):
So, what's the honorable thingI'm gonna do?
I'm gonna simply be honest withyou.
I'm gonna be honest with you,I'm gonna tell you who I am, I'm
gonna tell you what I do, and Ithink that's what gets lost in
so much of dating in this newera or this new generation.
(15:30):
It's so much shit going on.
You have IG, you have everybodytrying to be like get the likes
and the follows.
I don't give a damn about noneof that.
If people will listen to me, I'mjust an average person, that's
all I care about.
I'm just average, I'm notsomething that I'm not.
I don't try to go out there andflash and say, Oh yeah, I got
two cars and I own this, I ownthat.
(15:52):
No, you take me as I am.
If I don't look good to you, Idon't look good to you.
If I don't have enough money foryou, I don't have enough money
for you.
Don't you worry about it becausesomebody else will like it.
With that being said, MJ, um, Idid do some follow-up questions
for MJ, and um I asked what helooked like.
(16:15):
Now he did send a picture, whichI do won't share.
I don't ever share pictures orany kind of content um in
reference to hold on there.
I don't share any kind ofcontents in reference to my
listeners because I don't wantthem to either be attacked or
mocked or anything.
So I look at the pictures for myown FYI.
He's a white male, very handsomemale, 5'9, average build, couple
(16:39):
tats, but from what I can see,doesn't really seem like he's
he's you know somebody that isnot approachable, basically, so
to speak.
So um I asked what he does for aliving, he's in retail
management, he's been doing thatfor six years.
Not sure why I asked thisquestion, but I asked if he was
a virgin, he said no, and I saidhow many times in his lifetime?
10 times.
(17:00):
Not bad, no shade.
I asked how old he was, he's 28years old.
I asked, What is the longestrelationship that he has had?
Um, he had a relationship whenhe was younger in middle school.
The young lady that he dated wasa childhood friend.
Um, so he says roughly abouteight years.
So he's been with the same girlfor about uh since he was in
(17:20):
middle school, so probably achildhood friend.
Nothing wrong with that, it'sall good.
And I said, What happened to therelationship?
Uh she went to college, we triedto make it work, but eventually
it didn't.
She found someone else.
That happens, sometimes ithappens.
Um, I'm not sure if he's from asmall town or not because I
didn't really ask that question.
I asked him, was he a wealthyman?
(17:41):
He says he's not rich, but heknows how to save money and he
budgets very well.
Okay, so the question I asked,why do you spend so much money
on women if it's just the firstdate?
Because I believe in treating awoman right and I want her to
feel comfortable with me.
Okay, let's stop right there fora minute before I get to the
(18:02):
last one.
That's fine.
If you want somebody to feelcomfortable with you, just be
yourself.
You don't need to start flashingthe bag of flashing money.
The purpose of the date is foryou to get to know that person
so you can guys can kind ofconnect on a level that maybe
that is good for you both ofyou, maybe it's gonna see if
it's going to work or if it'snot gonna work.
(18:23):
So that's the purpose of thedate to sit down over a nice
dinner, kind of talk things out,try to get to know each other on
a level that you know mightplease you both.
And if it's not there, it's notthere.
If it's there, it's there.
So spending money, depending onand what I mean by money, I'm
(18:45):
talking about the gifts, I'm nottalking about dinner.
I'm not saying that the man heshould, he's not saying that he
should have taken her out for uhMcDonald's or Wendy's or
Chick-fil-A.
Hold on, Chick-fil-A is kind ofgood, you know.
I don't really consider thatcheap, but yeah, anyways.
I consider if you're going onthe first date at McDonald's,
yeah, clearly have a problem.
(19:05):
Why not go someplace that'sintimate?
So the last question that Iasked Mr.
MJ was do you hear back from anyof the women that you interacted
with?
He said, Not really, but I didhear back from the woman that
that tried to put a restrainingorder on me.
She said that we could tryagain, but the catch was she
wanted me to buy her some newitems from MK.
MK for people that don't know isMichael Coors.
(19:28):
I didn't know that.
I'm not a Michael Kors fan, Ihear great things, whatever.
I honestly don't know who thatis, but she said I bought things
from her before.
Well, you probably did.
I don't know.
I've never been to Macy'sbefore, and only set up new
deliveries.
Um, she also said that she wouldlet me do things to her after I
(19:50):
buy these items.
As desperate as I am, I saidhell no, and it was so hard to
say that.
So, MJ, kudos to you for notfalling for the bait and switch,
so to speak.
Um this woman only seen you forwhat you can do for her and not
(20:14):
what you can do with her.
And what I mean by that is thatyou're just somebody that
financially can probably takecare of her, but she's not gonna
be committed to you.
And when I say she's not gonnabe committed to you, I think if
you would have got back withthis woman and you would have
thought things have been goinggood, and maybe who's to say,
I'm not sure why she wouldbarter for sex for materialistic
(20:38):
things.
I don't get that.
If I have to pay you to have sexwith you, it's not gonna work
out for well for me because I'mnot paying for sex now.
Some people do that, I don'tknow what the catch is for me.
Paying for sex is not is notwhat I do, it's like a business
transaction.
I mean, the basics like eatingout.
(20:58):
I mean, eating out, you'repaying for something, and it's
like it's already gone, sothere's no kind of comfort.
I don't get people who do that,but then again, I'm not gonna
say I've never done it beforebecause I haven't done it
before.
Now it's different if you'rewell, I can't really say it's
different.
Paying for a service and payingfor sex are two different
(21:20):
things, but in any event, let meget back on track with him.
I'm glad you didn't do that.
Um, that is a good thing.
So I think what you should tryto do, you have restrained
yourself from I mean, she'sbasically willing to give it up
to you.
She's gonna give it up to you,so that's good.
You didn't take it, but asdesperate as I am, I probably
(21:42):
would have took the bait.
No, kidding.
So we're also gonna touch onsome things.
There is a um, there's a site onIG, or not site, these women
that are on IG that he refersto, um, they have a IG page, a
YouTube page.
It's called Smart GirlsFilipinas.
(22:05):
Now, basically what they do isthat to me, I thought they it's
kind of 50-50 with me.
Some of the information is good,some of the information is bad.
I don't know, it just depends onyou as a person and what you're
looking for.
What they do is that they tellyou about how to approach a
(22:26):
woman in the Philippines and howyou should um be leery of the
things that they do in thePhilippines, because let's be
honest, a lot of people thinkthat Filipinas are scammers.
Now, that can go either way,that can go either here in the
States or it can go for anywherein the world.
The choice is yours to do yourhomework and to do your due
diligence, and to say that Iwant to try to vet this girl
(22:49):
because I like this girl.
But if you want to go into therelationship um eyes wide open,
just start throwing money, thenyes, you're probably gonna get
scammed because I've never heardanybody in a relationship just
as you're menacing withinmeeting somebody, you just throw
money at them.
That just shows them how easyyou are, and that you could be
manipulated now.
And you can't be mad becauselisten, I've been to the
(23:13):
Philippines before.
I have it is the culture's good,the women are good.
Um, it's just a lot of thingsyou gotta look out for.
Um, there's a lot of scam goingon there, especially if you're
from another country.
If you don't know the game inthe Philippines, I encourage you
to quickly get acclimated to thegame.
Maybe watch some YouTube videos.
(23:35):
But getting back to the SmartGirls Philippine, I don't know.
I think it's three women.
I know the leader.
Uh well, the head woman, hername is I think it's Iris or
Iris, I don't know, but I followthem and I really wish I could
get them on the show.
Maybe we can talk about things.
But in any event, they put thewomen out there as if they're
just bad women, like theirculture is just full of just
(23:57):
riddled with bad women.
And to me personally, I don'tknow if somebody has hurt her or
her friends in the past orwhatever, because if you're a
foreign man going to thePhilippines, it is kind of like
a free-for-all.
If they see a foreign man, andthe worst thing you could
probably do is have your friendsmeet this man.
(24:17):
Because while you think thatyou're only there to meet her,
well, no, it's gonna be acompetition because there's
other women in play, and I'm notsaying this happens all the
time, but from nine times out often, this kind of does happen.
Now, as I said before, womenlike this are everywhere, it's
just that the Philippine womenare much more uh
(24:38):
family-oriented, they're muchmore humble, they're much more
honest, depending on who youget.
When I was on the site FilipinoCuban, yes, you do get hit with
a lot and a lot of DMs, and youget hit immediately.
And to men like me, that was agood thing because when I got on
(24:58):
the site, I felt overwhelmedabout it.
I was like, Oh my god, this isreally happening.
But what I didn't do is that Ididn't tell a woman how much
money I made, I let theconversation start with them.
If they started the conversationwith me, and then we kind of
talk it out, and we kind of gofrom there and we say, Well, um,
this is who I am.
(25:19):
I remember when I first went onthe site and I was like, Oh my
god, this is like overwhelmingbecause you get so much and so
many, and there's so manybeautiful women in this country,
and you don't think about thelife that they have in the
Philippines, and you are reallywant to know if these women are
for you.
I'm going to say 85% of thewomen in this country are for
(25:40):
looking for someone that theyreally want to be with and that
they really want to love.
The other 15% is just there tosee if he can get me this, he
can get me that.
Now, now they're not bad.
(26:01):
Um, but the site, you have to doyour own homework.
You have to, you can't.
I mean, you can listen to whatthey're saying, you can listen
to what I'm saying.
It's kind of a toss-up.
You are a grown man, you have tomake a decision on your own.
Mr.
MJ, I would encourage you if youdo, when you do go to Cebu, when
(26:22):
you go, be yourself, don't flashmoney.
Um, look average, don't go overthere trying to be the flashy
guy or the life of the party.
Because just as quickly as youget over there, you will find
yourself spending money that youdidn't think you had, and then
you will be like, Oh my god, Ispent all this over here.
Yes, you do, because when you goto the Philippines, whoever
you're trying to meet, they havefamily, depending on the
(26:45):
family's living situation.
And what I mean by that is ifthey are poor somewhere in
between or in between, inbetween, or if they're higher
up.
Now, the Philippines is abeautiful country, it really is,
but there is a high poverty ratewhen it comes to um, you know,
they're not people that are richin culture, sort of like uh the
(27:09):
US or Canada or the UnitedKingdom, there is a lot of
poverty, there's a lot ofsquatting over there.
Now, that doesn't take away thefact that there are beautiful,
smart, intelligent women therewho are looking for love.
They are looking for love andthey're looking for their mate,
somebody they can settle downwith because the life that they
have, it's not a good life.
(27:30):
And I gotta be honest with you,if I lived in the Philippines
and I wasn't that financiallywell off, I would be trying to
do the same thing.
I'm not saying that they're allthere for a green card because
when you meet somebody overthere, um, it's genuine, it's
real.
Uh, the family throws this bigcelebration, they have leachon,
leachon, which is apparently apig, um, and that's their
(27:50):
celebration.
They have pasta, and that'sanother celebration.
It turns out they don't eatpasta as frequent as Americans
do, um, they only eat pasta as acelebration.
Um, and leechon is a whole damnpig.
I mean, they cook bad boy up,and he is served up, and he's
served up beautifully, butthat's their celebration.
So when you go to um thePhilippines Cebu, I've been to
(28:15):
Manila and I've been to Makati.
Um, both are really good.
Um, I know this is your firsttime going over there.
You are going to see some thingsthat just look appealing to you,
and what I mean by that, you aregoing to see a lot of beautiful
women.
Temptation is hard, buttemptation is what you make of
it.
You can either choose to gothere, meet with one or two
(28:39):
women.
I mean, there's other sites thatyou can do.
I don't really know.
I know there is a there's a sitewhere they have like a group of
men and you go to like it's sortof like a speed dating thing.
I don't know if that's yourthing.
Speed dating to me wasn't to me,to me personally, if I want to
meet somebody, I want to meetthem on my terms.
I don't want to go to a placewith a group of guys, and then
(29:03):
they sort of like you're pickingme out as you're picking up
groceries or fruit off a shelfor something.
That's just not me.
But when I went to thePhilippines for the first time,
um, I was like, oh my god, thisis beautiful.
It's definitely not America, um,it's definitely different, it's
(29:26):
definitely an eye-opener becausethere are so many, so many, so
many beautiful women there.
And the sad thing is you don'tknow their background or their
history until you get to knowthem.
So I would encourage you to getto know these women.
If you're going over there forsex tourism, I wouldn't
recommend that, but uh, that'sneither here nor there for me.
(29:47):
So I didn't go over there forsex tourism.
I went over there for one woman,I met one woman, and we had a
great time.
Um, I know that a lot of menthink that sex tourism is is
fun, it is not.
Because not only are you havingsex with this woman, but you're
giving her the notion that shecould be the one.
And the sad thing is, if yourintentions are to go over there
(30:10):
to have sex with these women andshe's not the one, then who's
really going to be hurt here?
Is it going to be you or them?
Well, let's just say them.
Because while you're over theregetting everything off the damn
buffet, well, this woman islike, I thought he was the one.
So you can kind of distinguishand kind of figure out how that
(30:30):
this would be beneficial to you,how this would be more
detrimental to you, and how thiscan make you happy.
Because keep in mind, I don'tknow how long you're staying in
the Philippines, but I wouldjust encourage you to read up on
some notes, maybe check out someYouTube channels because what
(30:50):
you see is really what it is.
Um, I would also encourage youto um if you have cards, don't
take cash.
Uh, what I found out is thatbank cards, or depending on your
bank, works really well in thePhilippines, it's so much
easier, and becausepickpocketing is real in the
Philippines, let me tell you,it's real.
(31:11):
All they gotta do is bump you,and you like, oh, it's okay,
it's okay.
But meanwhile, when you get to aplace and you got cash, your
cash is gone.
It's gone.
Now, when I was there in thePhilippines and I was there with
my young lady, um, I would onlytake out 10k at a time, and I
know that to some of y'all,y'all think 10k 10,000 pesos is
(31:33):
a lot, it's clearly not.
That's about 150 US dollars.
I think I spent the better partof two weeks.
I think I spent around maybe1500, and that's including that
all the things that we did.
We went to, I think it's uhSeashore by the Bay, we went to
the Mall of Asia, uh, we went tosome kind of festival, and we
(31:55):
had a good time.
Though things are kind ofcheaper in the Philippines, but
you will really spend moneyreally quick if you're not
careful.
Keep in mind also.
When you meet this woman, shemay have somebody with her.
(32:16):
That's fine, that's good.
Keep in mind if you're gonnameet this person, they're gonna
have somebody with them.
You're not only gonna take careof her, but you're gonna take
care of who's ever with her.
Now, depending on herbackground, if she comes from
poverty or squatters area,squatters area is just basically
um they're poor.
So, of course, for the two weeksthat you're there, or however
(32:38):
long you're there, they want tosee the life that you can
provide for them, but with thesame understanding of the life
that you can provide for them,they want to make sure that you
can take care of their family.
Now, this is what I did um whenI went to go meet my girl.
I can't take care of the wholefamily.
If I'm with somebody, I'm onlywith you.
I'm not um dating the wholefamily.
(32:59):
Yes, I understand you want tobring gifts for the family, and
I did just that.
I brought gifts for the kids, Ibrought gifts for her sister.
That was pretty much it.
You have to know when to call itbecause though the temptation
and the what's the word I'mlooking for, and the comfort is
there knowing that this womanloves you and that she wants to
(33:22):
be with you.
Well, you're also gonna have todeal with the family.
Keep in mind, if you're therefor two, I'm gonna say you're
only there for two weeks.
The two weeks are gonna be thebest weeks, two weeks of their
life, of her life, not theirlives.
Probably said that right, theirlives.
Because you're a man, you're aforeigner, you're coming from a
foreign country where they thinkmost men from different
countries are rich, anyways.
(33:42):
I'm black, I ain't rich.
Okay, I worked two jobs, I madegood money, and I only work the
second job because my kids aregetting older and they don't
want to be around daddy anymore,so whatever.
Yeah, that is what it is.
Yeah, if you got kids, you know.
But when I went there, um it'snot the fact that I had to lay
down ground rules, but I had totell her that hey, I'm only here
(34:06):
for you.
Um, um, she's got two kids.
I don't care about the kids.
If you're a person that doesn'twant kids or don't know how to
deal with kids right now,completely fine.
I'm not going to say most of thewomen over there are pregnant
because you just don't know.
My thing is, MJ, you need to dosome notes when you go over
there, though these women arejust so beautiful and small,
(34:28):
petite, or whatever, but it'spossible they can have kids, and
that's not a bad thing.
Uh, what I've learned in theculture of the Philippines is
that Jesus, um, the women had toprovide more than the men do.
Um, also, what I do want topoint out to you.
(34:48):
Don't talk politics in thePhilippines.
I don't know.
Don't if they say since thislast trip that I went to
Makatai, the guy was a hugesupporter of our president.
I was not.
I pretty much bashed ourpresident, but you can't say
anything about their presidentbecause that'll quickly get you
thrown in jail as a foreigner.
(35:11):
What I also learned is that ohcrap, I just had that thought
and I lost it.
Oh, what I also learned is thatmake sure the women that you're
messing with are not married.
If they are married and thehusband finds out, yo ass is
going to jail.
Even though they may not betogether, well, his family could
(35:34):
be like, oh, well, this guy, hisforeigner came in and broke up
our home, and the next thing youknow, you sit in the Filipino
jail trying to figure out whatthe hell I did.
Make sure she's also of legalage.
Okay.
I know 18 is a big thing, andyou know, they're younger and
hotter, whatever.
Not for me, it ain't.
No, hell no.
(35:55):
No.
I don't date well, I don't dateanybody um younger than 25.
Um, 18, they're young.
18.
Now, I'm not saying it as a badthing because as I've seen time
and time again, especiallywatching this damn show, 90 Day
Fiance, where this guy um metthis 19-year-old and he was down
(36:19):
near 60, and I was like, Whatthe hell is this?
I'm not saying that it's badbecause I gotta admit, they are
much more mature women overthere than they are in probably
here and maybe in some otherplaces that you mean.
Again, no shade on women in theUS.
I'm just saying they're muchmore mature.
(36:40):
If I had found the right womanover here, I probably wouldn't
be in the Philippines, but Itried.
I did one, two, three times,three strikes are out.
I tried, so I know I may getcriticism from it.
I may people might be like, ohwell, he didn't give it long
enough.
Trust me, I've been along arounda long time, and what dating was
back in the day is damn sure notwhat it is today.
(37:00):
So I hope when you go over here,you have a phenomenal trip.
Um, I'm not sure what your partylife is like or what the the
night the night scene life islike, but I didn't go to any of
the nightlife.
Um, it is very temptation of thenightlife depending in Cebu Cebu
has some of the most beautifulwomen I've ever seen.
But then again, that's all partof Philippines.
(37:22):
You have to understand they area one-culture country, and what
I mean by one culture country isthat they're not diverse as the
UK or the United States orCanada.
When you go to some of thesecountries that are just one
culture, meaning that it's justtheir culture and their people
there, it's different for them.
You know, seeing a foreigner islike seeing a celebrity.
(37:45):
You know, I remember I went overthere and I had my jersey, my
Mahomes jersey on.
They're like, Oh, PatrickMahomes, Taylor Swift.
I don't know him, but I heargood things.
I don't know any of thesepeople.
But when I went over there, Iwas treated with respect,
decency.
Um, almost got in trouble forvaping outside uh the room, the
hotel, um, the condo that wewere staying at, because
(38:07):
apparently you can't vape insome areas and you can't smoke,
and they'll surely tell youabout it.
But they give you a pass becauseyou're foreigner and they know
you're a foreigner.
So, um if you're going alone, doyour due diligence, do your
homework.
Your parents are going to beyour parents.
They probably want what's betterfor you because they don't
understand that finding love ishard in this day and age.
(38:30):
I'm not sure how long yourparents have been together.
Sounds like they've beentogether for a while, but
finding love in this day and ageis a hard thing to do.
It is really hard.
So if you have to go to anotherculture, another country, and
visit another woman, then hey,that's what you gotta do.
I mean, you tried.
You know, the sad thing is womenin the US are when I found when
(39:03):
I was telling people that I metsomebody in the Philippines, you
know, I immediately got flagged,oh, you can't find somebody
here, or the women over hereain't better enough.
And why is that?
You don't want me, so why areyou coming down on me?
You don't want me, so you can'tbe you can't be mad at me for
trying to find my happiness.
That's what I understand aboutthis.
With so much interracial uhrelationships, I don't
(39:24):
understand when a woman gets madat a man for seeing them with a
different woman of a differentrace.
I don't get it.
You don't want me.
I tried everything in my powerto be with you, but you don't
want me.
So I'm not gonna make you loveme, I'm not gonna pay for you to
love me.
You either take me as I am oryou don't take me at all.
So, MJ, I understand your pain.
(39:47):
I do, I get where you're comingfrom.
I think that you have to decidewhat's gonna work best for you.
You have to be happy in what youwant to be happy with.
Again, don't take a lot of cashover there, don't flash,
whatever, whatever you'rewherever room you're staying at.
If you decide to bring a femaleback to your room, please, these
(40:11):
places provide safe, lockeverything up.
I was hoping that you would tellme that you met somebody that
you're going to um try to talkto them and get with this one
person, but I understand yougotta kind of test the waters,
you gotta kind of see which oneis better for you.
I get that.
But there was a guy on YouTubethat did the exact thing um that
(40:32):
you did.
It was his first time overthere.
He went over there um with eyeswide open, didn't think didn't
blink or do a second thought.
He met one woman.
Um I think he stayed with herfor a couple days.
It didn't work because shewanted money.
He met another woman.
Um, that didn't work because heran out of money.
Uh well he the second womanwanted more money and was trying
(40:55):
to get him to take care of thefamily, so that didn't work.
The third woman that he met, uh,young lady, I think she was
either 19 or 20.
Well, she kind of lied.
She said that she didn't haveany kids.
Turns out she had a daughter.
But by that point in time, um,he had gotten this young girl
pregnant.
Uh, the young girl came uppregnant, not with one, but she
(41:15):
came up pregnant with two.
I kid you not.
They did it before and afterwith this guy.
He went over there lookinghealthy, and when he left there,
it looked like he was damn nearhad one foot in the grave and
one foot out.
I was like, oh my god, what thehell?
He had gotten himself sostressed out, so stressed out
for what you don't go over theretrying to flaunt money because
yes, women are gonna flock tomoney over there because they
(41:38):
see you as an opportunity to getout of the life that they're in
now.
So, I'm not saying that is badfor all women in the
Philippines.
Hell, you have that here in thestates, so it doesn't matter
where you go, what matters isthat you do your homework and
you try to get to know the womanto understand her and try to
figure out if she's gonna be theright one for you.
(42:01):
So, when you go over there, Ihope that when you go over
there, you are just diligent inyour understanding of the
culture, the women, and whatthese women want.
Now, if you're going to meetsome of these women's families,
um man, I would really challengeyou to just try to meet one and
try to go from there.
But you're gonna be overwhelmed.
I hope when you go over there,you're gonna not gonna be too
(42:22):
overwhelmed.
But if you don't have thisnotion of a plan that and set
some limits for yourself, you'regonna come back broke.
So at best, oh, let's see.
The first time I went, I think Itook about 3,000 US dollars,
only ended up spending half ofthat.
So you don't have to go overthere and just basically put out
(42:49):
for anybody that you comeacross.
You don't have to.
So there's going to be a lot oftemptation.
If the lady the women that youmeet have siblings and they're
older siblings, keep in mindwhen one walks away, the other
one's gonna try to shoot theirshot.
And that's the hard thing aboutit.
Because everybody wants to getout, everybody, and it's it's
sad because they're such abeautiful people, but the
(43:12):
country itself is just riddledwith corruption, chaos, and
well, not really chaos, but justcorruption.
Um, and I think you have thateverywhere you go, but you don't
really see it until you go to aplace like the Philippines.
Um, this is the only place whereI've actually been where I've
seen people drinking streetwater, or I've seen a homeless
mother sleeping on the sidewalkwith her baby on a cardboard.
(43:35):
It's that real.
And I know you guys think, well,what did you do?
What did what I did?
I gave her some money, I boughther some Jolly V.
Turns out Jolly V is like theirMcDonald's over there.
It's good.
Um, you get rice witheverything, you pretty much get
it.
I mean, they got pretty mucheverything we have, but the food
portions and the food rationsare different than what it is
here, probably in the US andwhat other countries that you
(43:57):
come across, because their foodis not grown with hormones, not
like here.
Um I would just encourage you toman.
I would just encourage you to dosome homework before you leave.
You didn't really give me adeparture date, but it's fine.
(44:20):
You said next year.
Um, if you want to keeplistening to the women on Smart
Girl Filipinas, it's fine.
I'm not telling you, notdeterring you from that.
I just say do your homework.
I have nothing against thesewomen, but then again, I think
they're speaking maybe 50-50 ofhalf-truth and have just
(44:43):
blatantly being just wow, justbad towards their women.
But then again, we do that here.
So I personally don't, becausethere's not a woman that I'd
like to call out to say, well,she's bad or she's this, that,
and the other.
I don't.
I've had some relationships thatafter my wife died, well, not
really relationships, I've hadsome experiences that didn't
(45:03):
work out too well for me aftermy wife died, and I just choose
to go a different way.
Now, um, that's not to say thatI don't come across good women,
but it's always hard to find agood one.
And the women that you find herein the US, when you find them,
you're thinking that, oh my god,this could be the one, or and
then you find out she's withsomebody who's like basically
(45:25):
doing her like wrong in everypossible way.
And I'm like, what the hell?
What the hell is this?
So, and then you want to try tobe a friend and try to without
overstepping any boundaries orwithout being what do they call
that, a third reel, or trying tobreak up a happy home, or in
this case, sometimes a homeain't happy.
(45:48):
Oh, but MJ, I think your heartis in the right space.
I think it's in the right place.
I think that you need to justtake it slow.
Um, you're going over there,you're gonna have a good time.
My advice to you again do yourhomework, set some limits for
(46:12):
yourself.
Try to figure out what it isthat you want.
You're overwhelmed.
I'm pretty sure if you havetalked to many women on this
site that you have been tellinga lot of women, well, I'm gonna
be here, or I'm gonna be there,I'm gonna be this place.
Come see me, or where I can comesee you.
It sounds like to me you'regonna have a busy schedule, but
before you make your way toCebu, I would probably limit
(46:35):
that circle.
Um, I would limit that circle tomaybe about shit.
I would probably say about maybefour, maybe five.
I don't know.
I just don't know how longyou're gonna be there.
I would simply just probablylimit it to probably two.
Um the the the bad thing is thatthey all have a story, and
(46:57):
majority, nine times out of ten,that story is actually real.
Um, I've met a woman before inthe Philippines that was kind of
deceitful.
Um, that she said, Well, ohwell, I love you.
And then here's the other thing: if you meet a woman and she's (47:11):
undefined
automatically talking aboutgreen card and marriage, red
flag, red freaking flag, becausethat's just telling you that oh,
she's there to get out.
Because here's here's a funnything.
I'm gonna share a story withyou.
When I met uh first Filipino onthe site, um I thought she was
genuine, and I think by maybethe fifth or sixth conversation,
(47:33):
we were already talking aboutgreen card and marriage, but
only to find out that when youget these females' numbers,
that's the bad thing about thesedamn phones and the algorithms.
Well, on Facebook, um, this wasa friend suggestion.
I was like, Wait, this chicklooked familiar, and I thought
for a minute, no, she couldn'tbe the one, but it sure enough,
(47:53):
it was the same chick that I wastalking to.
But the chick had another guy onthe on her page, and she was
talking to him, and was like,Well, I can't wait to come to
the US so I can meet you.
I don't know how true that wasbecause the post is very recent.
So, while it's kind of hard totry to fathom if these women are
(48:15):
real or not, I think these womenare doing uh I don't want to say
it in a bad way, but they'realso kind of testing their
waters to see who's real andwho's not.
Um, I would suggest if you don'thave kids, don't go over there
and try to get a girl pregnant,or not try, but use protection
because it sounds like to meyou're gonna be you're gonna be
(48:36):
a lot overwhelmed.
Very overwhelmed.
So, and I wasn't even mad at thefact that this woman did this to
me, I was just more hurt becauseI had a lot to learn about
online dating and datinginternationally.
Yes, you can't always see theone you're with.
(48:58):
Now you're probably gonna say,Well, what makes this woman
different?
Uh, and how can you trust her?
Okay, well, I can trust herbecause we talk on a daily
basis.
Number one, number two, um, whenI first went there, um, or when
I first started talking, she washonest about everything.
There are some things that Ifound out along the way that I
(49:19):
thought was a little bit kind ofdeceiving, but then again, I was
like, okay, well, and then herwillingness to contact me every
day.
And then the crazy thing is shenever asked for a single damn
dime of my money, didn't ask fora single dime.
And the woman that I met um wasstaying in Squattersville.
Again, Squattersville is justbasically a homeless camp that
(49:41):
are built up by um um they takeover, it's not really a
takeover, but they settle onproperty.
Um, they have cardboard shacksand a room that's probably no
bigger than a bathroom.
But we talked and we shared somethings, and she said some
things, and then when I wentover there to go meet her, it's
like the best thing ever.
(50:02):
And then after I left, we stillkept that same energy going, you
know.
I fell in love with her, I fellhard in love with her.
And sure, there's like a millionother women that in my DMs.
I mean, the minute I met thisyoung lady, I stayed on Filipino
cube for probably maybe about aweek or two, and then I was
like, you know what?
I think she's the one.
She had two kids, verybeautiful, very humble.
(50:25):
Um, she's always looking forwork.
Now, here's the other sad thing.
They tell you they're lookingfor work, that's because they
are, but the Philippines is notlike the US.
There, their dropout rate inschool is way more higher than
what we have here.
You have them dropping outprobably after elementary, and
that's because they have to payfor everything under the damn
(50:47):
sun.
You have to pay for water, youhave to pay for uh uh schooling,
school lunch.
There's no transportation, yougotta pay for transportation,
you gotta pay for uniform, yougotta pay for exams, you gotta
pay for them to take tests.
In all my years on this world,and like I said, this is my
first time going to thePhilippines.
Never heard of it, never heardof it.
(51:08):
And I'm like, damn, y'all payfor everything.
You can't even drink the waterover there.
So when you go over there, keepan open mind.
Um, if somebody does you dirty,don't get an attitude, don't go
ham.
You sound like you don't have atemper, you sound like you're
kind of laid back, like I am.
That's a good thing.
(51:29):
Keep being laid back.
Um, don't get into any fightsover there.
If somebody does you wrong,please, for your sake, just walk
the hell away.
Walk away again.
Make sure she's not married,make sure she's not seeing
anybody.
These are questions that youneed to ask up front.
Um when you ask these questions,if they say I don't know,
(51:52):
because like I said, some of thestuff that these women say on
Smart Girl Filipinas are isactually true.
If they say that they have anuncle, or I don't know.
I don't know how to explain it,but the fact of the matter is
you gotta be Leary.
And the crazy thing is there'sthere's way more women, way more
(52:15):
men and women over there thanmen, like a lot of women, and
that's the sad thing because themen over there aren't really
worth a damn.
I mean, I know we have thoseproblems, these problems here,
but we have course for shit likethat.
But over there, it's sodifferent, man.
It's different.
And the wires that you see onYouTube, that shit really is
(52:35):
like that.
It's like that.
So as we get ready to wrap thisshow up, um, Mr.
MJ, man.
I want to follow up.
I definitely want to follow up.
So I hope that this podcastfinds you well.
I hope that you take what I'msaying into consideration.
I am not always right 100% ofthe time, these are just my
(52:56):
experiences when I went overthere.
So they're my experiences, andthis is what I went what I went
through.
And my experiences were good,you know, because while I was
there and we went to I don'tknow what let me see if I can
find out what this thing called.
C shore, assume, assume I don'tknow what it is.
(53:17):
Some SC, I don't know, C shore,I don't know.
Let me hold on, see if I canfind it.
(53:37):
Okay, hold on.
Excuse me.
No, this isn't it.
It's not dreamplay, but we wentto Hang on, I'm getting it.
(54:05):
Okay, so this No, it wasn't thatone.
Star City.
You know what?
I can't for the life of me can'tfind this damn thing.
Even though I went there.
Uh oh, hold on.
(54:28):
Because we gotta get ready rightto show up.
Uh so it's I guess it's just oh,seaside.
Oh.
(54:49):
So it is the SM Mall of Asia.
So we went there, of course,they had like a theme park and a
whole bunch of other stuff.
It's called It was a BeautifulPlace.
So um, we went there, we had agood time, but as I said, and I
(55:09):
was there, and while I wasthere, there was a young lady
that came up to me, and she wasselling like like candy bars,
and she's like, I need money forstudies.
Can you buy a candy bar?
So, and then the other thing is,oh my god, this was so freaking
ridiculous.
The child, uh, we was in the inthe taxi, and a kid was washing
(55:30):
the window, like took a rag andjust washed the window, and then
my girl was like, hand him this,and we gave him some change
because I was like, Oh my god,this shit really happens here.
I mean, this would be frowned onin in our country.
She's like, Babe, really, yes,hell yeah, kid out here.
I mean, these are like littlekids, like seven or eight
washing car windows.
I mean, the traffic there isridiculous.
(55:52):
It's like the Indy 500 on acid,but oh my god.
In any event, I enjoyed my timewith the Philippines.
I enjoyed my time with thepeople, the culture, the food.
The food was good.
Um, of course, they eat a lot oframen noodles, which is called
pen panchet, panchet noodles,but hey, whatever, it's good.
Um, it was good.
(56:13):
So I'll do a follow-up show tomy um second trip in the
Philippines, which I had areally good time.
The flight, I'm not sure whereyou're coming from, but it's a
14-hour flight from where I'mat.
Um, but it was good.
So, MJ, I hope this podcastfinds you well.
I hope that you go to and havefun.
(56:36):
I hope that you don't doanything stupid or silly that's
gonna get you locked up abroadbecause I don't know, uh, you
are white, so the governmentmight take pity on you and be
like, Yeah, we need him back.
I'm kidding, I'm joking.
But as I said, my friend, um, Ihope this finds you well.
(56:56):
And for those of my listeners,if you're tuned in, listening,
watching me, you have questions,concerns, comment, please feel
free to email me at d6mpire357at gmail.com.
I am on buzzfrouts uh.com.
The show is called uh the D6Empire The Family.
(57:17):
I am also on IG, TikTok, I amicon, and you can find me and
follow me there.
I don't know how well I can postthe links on this site here,
Buzzcast, because I thoughtBuzzcast and Buzzrouts were the
same people.
Clearly, they are not, but hey,whatever.
In any event, I want to thankall my listeners for uh
(57:39):
listening.
I want to thank the supportersthat supporting me and that
you're coming through with theletters because let's be honest,
I only do this because I likedoing it, it's fun.
I don't talk about celebritythings, I don't talk about
politics because it's not me.
I'm an average person like you,and I'm just here just to maybe
I can make somebody's lifebetter.
And if you like the content, youlike it.
(58:00):
If you don't, you don't.
It's up to you.
But I welcome all kinds of formsof criticism, compliments,
whatever.
Um, episodes drop everyWednesday.
Um, so if you want to follow meagain, my podcast is streaming
anywhere you listen to podcasts: Amazon, Spotify, iTunes, uh, FM (58:16):
undefined
Podcasts, Ditzler, whatever.
Any place you could stream.
I'm also globallyinternationally known.
No, I'm just joking.
But in any event, MJ, we'regonna get ready to get out of
here.
Thanks for the letter.
Appreciate the letter.
(58:37):
Hope this uh helps you on yourway and your journey.
But as I encourage you to do, Iwould encourage you to get on
YouTube, look at some videos,some up-to-date videos, maybe of
this year or a year, and justtry to figure out what's gonna
be good for you.
So, if this is your firstexperience going to the
Philippines, I wish you well, Iwish you nothing but the best.
I hope you find your happiness,I hope you find your peace, I
(58:59):
hope everything is going to begood for you.
So, until next time, my friends,you guys take care of yourself
and each other.
But for right now, we got onemore track called Witness by T
Cleaf, and we're just gonnagroove with that as we get ready
to take the show out.
Until next time, guys, take careof yourself and each other.
Well, you're in his mind, a man that is admired,
fun, compassionate,understanding, and very
sarcastic.
But hey, that's who he is.
The advice can either be good ormisunderstood, but he does
become experienced.
So stick back, listen up, volumeup, and let's talk about it.
SPEAKER_02 (04:29):
Before we get started.
(05:08):
Sometimes you just gotta letthat groove.
We don't get started here.
Oh man, you gotta love days likethis, right?
Sit back, chill.
Yes, yes.
Alright, well, how's everybodydoing out there?
Everybody, we doing alright, wedoing good.
(05:28):
Yes, yes, here we go.
I'm the icon.
Welcome to the show.
The show is called Let's TalkAbout It.
We're here.
We have letters from just randompeople who just want my advice
or opinions on any andeverything they sent to me.
I'm not a licensed therapist.
(05:49):
I sometimes give good advice, orjust sometimes I just give
advice.
So if you follow me, you knowthat you can stream my podcast
anywhere you stream podcastsAmazon, Spotify, iTunes,
YouTube.
You can follow me on TikTok, IG,for the most part.
Here we go.
(06:10):
Let's get started, shall we?
Hope everybody's having a greatday today, because I'm having a
fantastic day.
Oh man, you gotta love that.
Love the vibes.
That's all good though.
In any event.
I have a letter here from Mr.
Mike J.
(06:32):
Hold on, notifications goingoff.
Uh Mr.
Mike J or BKA MJ.
So, without further ado, here wego.
Let's get this started, shallwe?
Icon.
(06:53):
My name is Mike J.
I don't really know your show,but a friend of mine listens and
it seems and he seems to enjoyyour content.
So I figured what the hell?
He turned me on to your show,and I listened to about one of
your episodes about having along distance relationship and
decided to give it a try.
So here's my problem.
(07:14):
My relationship here in the USis just bad, and I think it's
because I have too much to offerin terms of money, and not other
things that come with therelationship.
I've dated white women, blackwomen, Mexican women, I've even
dated an Indian woman.
Yes, all are different in a way,but most have one thing in
common, and that's money.
(07:36):
I give them gifts or I share orI give them money or I share
them with gifts.
But not none of them have thepleasure of relations or given
me the satisfaction of pleasure.
Well the Ebony chick almosttossed it up to me, but she said
she had to call her sitter andshe had to go home.
Come to find out, weeks later,she didn't even have a kid.
(07:56):
I later spoke with her about twoweeks ago, and she had told me
that she just found out that shewas gay.
Awkward.
I was like WTF.
But the funny thing is the guyshe was with clearly clearly is
her dude and introduced me as avalet guy.
But get this.
I seen her at a freakingMcDonald's, and who in the hell
(08:19):
does valet at a McDonald's?
Nobody I know unless you're inan upscale part of town, but
that's neither here nor there,because I don't get out much.
But I let her ride becauseclearly she's not worth it.
And after that, I decided totake a break.
So two days later, I found abeautiful white woman.
You took a break for two damndays, and you found a beautiful
white woman.
SPEAKER_01 (08:38):
Okay, that's good.
It's good.
SPEAKER_02 (08:39):
Who I thought was a one for me, but it turns out she
just wanted the bag.
Then the bag in most cases meansthe money.
She wanted the money.
Again, we went on a few dates.
I took her shopping in anupscale clothing store, Target
and Macy's.
If anybody thinks Target isupscale, you own something, but
whatever, it is what it is.
(09:00):
I spent about two grand.
God damn, I guess you couldspend that about Macy's.
I can see, but Target, eh, maybewho knows.
Anyways, Target is more of anupscaler uh retail store,
upscale from Walmart, butWalmart is my upscale retail
store.
Anyways, I spent two grand, fastforward to the night in
(09:22):
question, and I was like, WTF,not again.
But her excuse was I'm on mymonthly, so of course I didn't
believe her, and I said, Let mesee.
That's kind of disgustingbecause if a woman tells me that
she's on her monthly, I don'tneed to see any proof.
I'm good.
She got mad, stormed out, tookeverything I bought her with
(09:42):
her, and I didn't see her till amonth later, and that didn't go
well.
Let's just say I now have to goto court on a restraining order.
Damn, Icon, I didn't even doanything wrong.
I got mad, I lost my temper, butI would never hit a woman.
That's a good thing.
Needless to say, that I went tocourt and the restraining order
got tossed.
(10:03):
Thank God.
I just wanted to find love.
I want to be happy.
So I've done what you've done.
So, wait, I have done whatyou've done.
Before writing this letter, Iwent on a site called Filipino
Cupid.
And let me say, I think it'slike hitting the lottery.
And it kind of seemsoverwhelming, I can tell you
that.
(10:23):
Once I registered, paid themonthly fee, the DMs was like
women at an Usher concert.
Yeah, I don't I've never been toan Usher concert, but I I take
your word for it.
I felt so alive.
I started to feel better aboutmyself again.
I had so many to choose from.
At one point, I started thinkingthat I was just a chosen one.
Like and I and I feel howcelebrity feels when he or she
(10:45):
meets fans.
SPEAKER_01 (10:46):
Well, I don't know.
I don't know, but it's it'sgood, it's good, it's good.
SPEAKER_02 (10:52):
I must have met and chatted over 20 women from the
Philippines, and the DMs justkeeps going.
It's like scrolling on IG thatdoesn't stop.
Yeah, that is true.
So my question is for youbecause I like what I'm seeing,
and I like, and I feel likethere's some real connections,
but I'm so elated on what to doand having to talk to my
parents.
And they said that I should justkeep looking in the states, and
(11:14):
it doesn't matter how long ittakes as long as I find a woman
in America.
They said the Philippines womenare not loyal.
I beg a different, but whatever.
Um, so I understand you dated awoman from the Philippines, and
I wanted to know how that'sworking for you because next
summer I'm going to Cebu to meeta few of them, and I've had the
(11:36):
pleasure of chatting with.
This is new for me, but it feelsright.
My mom has also turned me ontothe site about women in the
Philippines called Smart GirlPhilippines.
We'll get into that later.
But I have to say, most of theircontent seems to talk down about
the women uh there, like they'reall bad, and that and I that I
should look elsewhere.
(11:59):
But I don't want to because theattention I'm getting, plus the
ones that care are so genuine.
So, in your experience, what isyour advice to me?
Because I want to be the bestand I want to be a better
version of me, and I'm honestlyjust so tired of being lonely.
Signed MJ.
(12:19):
So, this is a letter from MJ,who is clearly feeling the heat
or the pressure of dating womenin the US, and and I talk about
in one of my um episodes thatthe reasons why I don't date
American women, it doesn'tmatter um that you're a
(12:39):
different ethnicity or ethnicculture.
Doesn't matter if you're white,black, Asian, Mexican, whatever.
If you were born here inAmerica, uh to me, you have been
somewhat Americanized by theculture and you have adapted to
the culture because dating wasnothing like what it was back in
my day.
(13:00):
Back in my day, you couldapproach a woman and they would
give you the time of day andthey would speak to you, and
then they would probably say,let's, and then and you could
probably ask them out on a date.
Now, in today's culture andsociety, that somehow is just
not like that.
And I'm not saying there's a lotof bad women in the US, it is
(13:21):
just hard to find a woman in theUS.
So, after my wife died, as Isaid before, I went through
therapy.
I my therapist was even tellingme to I should get out and try
to um date more, but I didn't Iwasn't ready to date, so I just
(13:42):
wanted friends.
And like I said before, thewomen that I approached upon
that, it was just not a good, itwas just not good.
You know, one lady I held thedoor open for, and I catch up, I
didn't say anything to her, Ijust said that um have a good
day.
And she said, Well, I got a man.
I said, Okay, I didn't sayanything.
I said, I got a man, okay.
You got a man.
(14:02):
I didn't even ask for anything.
So on that part, I understand.
I have gone on a date aftermaybe after my wife passed away,
not right directly after, butand it just was not what I was
looking for.
You know, I am not a rich man, Iam an average, um average male.
(14:25):
I work two jobs, I take care ofmy kids, I love my kids, I love
my family.
Now, in today's society, thewomen that I have come across,
and this is no shade towards anywoman ever.
I just feel that if I'm tryingto provide you genuine or be
(14:45):
genuine for you, I'm not tryingto be something that I'm not
because I'm not gonna besomething I'm not.
I'm not gonna try to have, I'mnot gonna tell you that I can
promise you this thing, but I doanother.
I'm not gonna show you theflash, and I'm not going to try
to make you appease, uh, makeyou appeal to my better nature.
So basically, I'm not gonna tellyou that I can do all these
stuff, I can do all this stufffor you, and I know I can't.
(15:07):
So, what's the honorable thingI'm gonna do?
I'm gonna simply be honest withyou.
I'm gonna be honest with you,I'm gonna tell you who I am, I'm
gonna tell you what I do, and Ithink that's what gets lost in
so much of dating in this newera or this new generation.
(15:30):
It's so much shit going on.
You have IG, you have everybodytrying to be like get the likes
and the follows.
I don't give a damn about noneof that.
If people will listen to me, I'mjust an average person, that's
all I care about.
I'm just average, I'm notsomething that I'm not.
I don't try to go out there andflash and say, Oh yeah, I got
two cars and I own this, I ownthat.
(15:52):
No, you take me as I am.
If I don't look good to you, Idon't look good to you.
If I don't have enough money foryou, I don't have enough money
for you.
Don't you worry about it becausesomebody else will like it.
With that being said, MJ, um, Idid do some follow-up questions
for MJ, and um I asked what helooked like.
(16:15):
Now he did send a picture, whichI do won't share.
I don't ever share pictures orany kind of content um in
reference to hold on there.
I don't share any kind ofcontents in reference to my
listeners because I don't wantthem to either be attacked or
mocked or anything.
So I look at the pictures for myown FYI.
He's a white male, very handsomemale, 5'9, average build, couple
(16:39):
tats, but from what I can see,doesn't really seem like he's
he's you know somebody that isnot approachable, basically, so
to speak.
So um I asked what he does for aliving, he's in retail
management, he's been doing thatfor six years.
Not sure why I asked thisquestion, but I asked if he was
a virgin, he said no, and I saidhow many times in his lifetime?
10 times.
(17:00):
Not bad, no shade.
I asked how old he was, he's 28years old.
I asked, What is the longestrelationship that he has had?
Um, he had a relationship whenhe was younger in middle school.
The young lady that he dated wasa childhood friend.
Um, so he says roughly abouteight years.
So he's been with the same girlfor about uh since he was in
(17:20):
middle school, so probably achildhood friend.
Nothing wrong with that, it'sall good.
And I said, What happened to therelationship?
Uh she went to college, we triedto make it work, but eventually
it didn't.
She found someone else.
That happens, sometimes ithappens.
Um, I'm not sure if he's from asmall town or not because I
didn't really ask that question.
I asked him, was he a wealthyman?
(17:41):
He says he's not rich, but heknows how to save money and he
budgets very well.
Okay, so the question I asked,why do you spend so much money
on women if it's just the firstdate?
Because I believe in treating awoman right and I want her to
feel comfortable with me.
Okay, let's stop right there fora minute before I get to the
(18:02):
last one.
That's fine.
If you want somebody to feelcomfortable with you, just be
yourself.
You don't need to start flashingthe bag of flashing money.
The purpose of the date is foryou to get to know that person
so you can guys can kind ofconnect on a level that maybe
that is good for you both ofyou, maybe it's gonna see if
it's going to work or if it'snot gonna work.
(18:23):
So that's the purpose of thedate to sit down over a nice
dinner, kind of talk things out,try to get to know each other on
a level that you know mightplease you both.
And if it's not there, it's notthere.
If it's there, it's there.
So spending money, depending onand what I mean by money, I'm
(18:45):
talking about the gifts, I'm nottalking about dinner.
I'm not saying that the man heshould, he's not saying that he
should have taken her out for uhMcDonald's or Wendy's or
Chick-fil-A.
Hold on, Chick-fil-A is kind ofgood, you know.
I don't really consider thatcheap, but yeah, anyways.
I consider if you're going onthe first date at McDonald's,
yeah, clearly have a problem.
(19:05):
Why not go someplace that'sintimate?
So the last question that Iasked Mr.
MJ was do you hear back from anyof the women that you interacted
with?
He said, Not really, but I didhear back from the woman that
that tried to put a restrainingorder on me.
She said that we could tryagain, but the catch was she
wanted me to buy her some newitems from MK.
MK for people that don't know isMichael Coors.
(19:28):
I didn't know that.
I'm not a Michael Kors fan, Ihear great things, whatever.
I honestly don't know who thatis, but she said I bought things
from her before.
Well, you probably did.
I don't know.
I've never been to Macy'sbefore, and only set up new
deliveries.
Um, she also said that she wouldlet me do things to her after I
(19:50):
buy these items.
As desperate as I am, I saidhell no, and it was so hard to
say that.
So, MJ, kudos to you for notfalling for the bait and switch,
so to speak.
Um this woman only seen you forwhat you can do for her and not
(20:14):
what you can do with her.
And what I mean by that is thatyou're just somebody that
financially can probably takecare of her, but she's not gonna
be committed to you.
And when I say she's not gonnabe committed to you, I think if
you would have got back withthis woman and you would have
thought things have been goinggood, and maybe who's to say,
I'm not sure why she wouldbarter for sex for materialistic
(20:38):
things.
I don't get that.
If I have to pay you to have sexwith you, it's not gonna work
out for well for me because I'mnot paying for sex now.
Some people do that, I don'tknow what the catch is for me.
Paying for sex is not is notwhat I do, it's like a business
transaction.
I mean, the basics like eatingout.
(20:58):
I mean, eating out, you'repaying for something, and it's
like it's already gone, sothere's no kind of comfort.
I don't get people who do that,but then again, I'm not gonna
say I've never done it beforebecause I haven't done it
before.
Now it's different if you'rewell, I can't really say it's
different.
Paying for a service and payingfor sex are two different
(21:20):
things, but in any event, let meget back on track with him.
I'm glad you didn't do that.
Um, that is a good thing.
So I think what you should tryto do, you have restrained
yourself from I mean, she'sbasically willing to give it up
to you.
She's gonna give it up to you,so that's good.
You didn't take it, but asdesperate as I am, I probably
(21:42):
would have took the bait.
No, kidding.
So we're also gonna touch onsome things.
There is a um, there's a site onIG, or not site, these women
that are on IG that he refersto, um, they have a IG page, a
YouTube page.
It's called Smart GirlsFilipinas.
(22:05):
Now, basically what they do isthat to me, I thought they it's
kind of 50-50 with me.
Some of the information is good,some of the information is bad.
I don't know, it just depends onyou as a person and what you're
looking for.
What they do is that they tellyou about how to approach a
(22:26):
woman in the Philippines and howyou should um be leery of the
things that they do in thePhilippines, because let's be
honest, a lot of people thinkthat Filipinas are scammers.
Now, that can go either way,that can go either here in the
States or it can go for anywherein the world.
The choice is yours to do yourhomework and to do your due
diligence, and to say that Iwant to try to vet this girl
(22:49):
because I like this girl.
But if you want to go into therelationship um eyes wide open,
just start throwing money, thenyes, you're probably gonna get
scammed because I've never heardanybody in a relationship just
as you're menacing withinmeeting somebody, you just throw
money at them.
That just shows them how easyyou are, and that you could be
manipulated now.
And you can't be mad becauselisten, I've been to the
(23:13):
Philippines before.
I have it is the culture's good,the women are good.
Um, it's just a lot of thingsyou gotta look out for.
Um, there's a lot of scam goingon there, especially if you're
from another country.
If you don't know the game inthe Philippines, I encourage you
to quickly get acclimated to thegame.
Maybe watch some YouTube videos.
(23:35):
But getting back to the SmartGirls Philippine, I don't know.
I think it's three women.
I know the leader.
Uh well, the head woman, hername is I think it's Iris or
Iris, I don't know, but I followthem and I really wish I could
get them on the show.
Maybe we can talk about things.
But in any event, they put thewomen out there as if they're
just bad women, like theirculture is just full of just
(23:57):
riddled with bad women.
And to me personally, I don'tknow if somebody has hurt her or
her friends in the past orwhatever, because if you're a
foreign man going to thePhilippines, it is kind of like
a free-for-all.
If they see a foreign man, andthe worst thing you could
probably do is have your friendsmeet this man.
(24:17):
Because while you think thatyou're only there to meet her,
well, no, it's gonna be acompetition because there's
other women in play, and I'm notsaying this happens all the
time, but from nine times out often, this kind of does happen.
Now, as I said before, womenlike this are everywhere, it's
just that the Philippine womenare much more uh
(24:38):
family-oriented, they're muchmore humble, they're much more
honest, depending on who youget.
When I was on the site FilipinoCuban, yes, you do get hit with
a lot and a lot of DMs, and youget hit immediately.
And to men like me, that was agood thing because when I got on
(24:58):
the site, I felt overwhelmedabout it.
I was like, Oh my god, this isreally happening.
But what I didn't do is that Ididn't tell a woman how much
money I made, I let theconversation start with them.
If they started the conversationwith me, and then we kind of
talk it out, and we kind of gofrom there and we say, Well, um,
this is who I am.
(25:19):
I remember when I first went onthe site and I was like, Oh my
god, this is like overwhelmingbecause you get so much and so
many, and there's so manybeautiful women in this country,
and you don't think about thelife that they have in the
Philippines, and you are reallywant to know if these women are
for you.
I'm going to say 85% of thewomen in this country are for
(25:40):
looking for someone that theyreally want to be with and that
they really want to love.
The other 15% is just there tosee if he can get me this, he
can get me that.
Now, now they're not bad.
(26:01):
Um, but the site, you have to doyour own homework.
You have to, you can't.
I mean, you can listen to whatthey're saying, you can listen
to what I'm saying.
It's kind of a toss-up.
You are a grown man, you have tomake a decision on your own.
Mr.
MJ, I would encourage you if youdo, when you do go to Cebu, when
(26:22):
you go, be yourself, don't flashmoney.
Um, look average, don't go overthere trying to be the flashy
guy or the life of the party.
Because just as quickly as youget over there, you will find
yourself spending money that youdidn't think you had, and then
you will be like, Oh my god, Ispent all this over here.
Yes, you do, because when you goto the Philippines, whoever
you're trying to meet, they havefamily, depending on the
(26:45):
family's living situation.
And what I mean by that is ifthey are poor somewhere in
between or in between, inbetween, or if they're higher
up.
Now, the Philippines is abeautiful country, it really is,
but there is a high poverty ratewhen it comes to um, you know,
they're not people that are richin culture, sort of like uh the
(27:09):
US or Canada or the UnitedKingdom, there is a lot of
poverty, there's a lot ofsquatting over there.
Now, that doesn't take away thefact that there are beautiful,
smart, intelligent women therewho are looking for love.
They are looking for love andthey're looking for their mate,
somebody they can settle downwith because the life that they
have, it's not a good life.
(27:30):
And I gotta be honest with you,if I lived in the Philippines
and I wasn't that financiallywell off, I would be trying to
do the same thing.
I'm not saying that they're allthere for a green card because
when you meet somebody overthere, um, it's genuine, it's
real.
Uh, the family throws this bigcelebration, they have leachon,
leachon, which is apparently apig, um, and that's their
(27:50):
celebration.
They have pasta, and that'sanother celebration.
It turns out they don't eatpasta as frequent as Americans
do, um, they only eat pasta as acelebration.
Um, and leechon is a whole damnpig.
I mean, they cook bad boy up,and he is served up, and he's
served up beautifully, butthat's their celebration.
So when you go to um thePhilippines Cebu, I've been to
(28:15):
Manila and I've been to Makati.
Um, both are really good.
Um, I know this is your firsttime going over there.
You are going to see some thingsthat just look appealing to you,
and what I mean by that, you aregoing to see a lot of beautiful
women.
Temptation is hard, buttemptation is what you make of
it.
You can either choose to gothere, meet with one or two
(28:39):
women.
I mean, there's other sites thatyou can do.
I don't really know.
I know there is a there's a sitewhere they have like a group of
men and you go to like it's sortof like a speed dating thing.
I don't know if that's yourthing.
Speed dating to me wasn't to me,to me personally, if I want to
meet somebody, I want to meetthem on my terms.
I don't want to go to a placewith a group of guys, and then
(29:03):
they sort of like you're pickingme out as you're picking up
groceries or fruit off a shelfor something.
That's just not me.
But when I went to thePhilippines for the first time,
um, I was like, oh my god, thisis beautiful.
It's definitely not America, um,it's definitely different, it's
(29:26):
definitely an eye-opener becausethere are so many, so many, so
many beautiful women there.
And the sad thing is you don'tknow their background or their
history until you get to knowthem.
So I would encourage you to getto know these women.
If you're going over there forsex tourism, I wouldn't
recommend that, but uh, that'sneither here nor there for me.
(29:47):
So I didn't go over there forsex tourism.
I went over there for one woman,I met one woman, and we had a
great time.
Um, I know that a lot of menthink that sex tourism is is
fun, it is not.
Because not only are you havingsex with this woman, but you're
giving her the notion that shecould be the one.
And the sad thing is, if yourintentions are to go over there
(30:10):
to have sex with these women andshe's not the one, then who's
really going to be hurt here?
Is it going to be you or them?
Well, let's just say them.
Because while you're over theregetting everything off the damn
buffet, well, this woman islike, I thought he was the one.
So you can kind of distinguishand kind of figure out how that
(30:30):
this would be beneficial to you,how this would be more
detrimental to you, and how thiscan make you happy.
Because keep in mind, I don'tknow how long you're staying in
the Philippines, but I wouldjust encourage you to read up on
some notes, maybe check out someYouTube channels because what
(30:50):
you see is really what it is.
Um, I would also encourage youto um if you have cards, don't
take cash.
Uh, what I found out is thatbank cards, or depending on your
bank, works really well in thePhilippines, it's so much
easier, and becausepickpocketing is real in the
Philippines, let me tell you,it's real.
(31:11):
All they gotta do is bump you,and you like, oh, it's okay,
it's okay.
But meanwhile, when you get to aplace and you got cash, your
cash is gone.
It's gone.
Now, when I was there in thePhilippines and I was there with
my young lady, um, I would onlytake out 10k at a time, and I
know that to some of y'all,y'all think 10k 10,000 pesos is
(31:33):
a lot, it's clearly not.
That's about 150 US dollars.
I think I spent the better partof two weeks.
I think I spent around maybe1500, and that's including that
all the things that we did.
We went to, I think it's uhSeashore by the Bay, we went to
the Mall of Asia, uh, we went tosome kind of festival, and we
(31:55):
had a good time.
Though things are kind ofcheaper in the Philippines, but
you will really spend moneyreally quick if you're not
careful.
Keep in mind also.
When you meet this woman, shemay have somebody with her.
(32:16):
That's fine, that's good.
Keep in mind if you're gonnameet this person, they're gonna
have somebody with them.
You're not only gonna take careof her, but you're gonna take
care of who's ever with her.
Now, depending on herbackground, if she comes from
poverty or squatters area,squatters area is just basically
um they're poor.
So, of course, for the two weeksthat you're there, or however
(32:38):
long you're there, they want tosee the life that you can
provide for them, but with thesame understanding of the life
that you can provide for them,they want to make sure that you
can take care of their family.
Now, this is what I did um whenI went to go meet my girl.
I can't take care of the wholefamily.
If I'm with somebody, I'm onlywith you.
I'm not um dating the wholefamily.
(32:59):
Yes, I understand you want tobring gifts for the family, and
I did just that.
I brought gifts for the kids, Ibrought gifts for her sister.
That was pretty much it.
You have to know when to call itbecause though the temptation
and the what's the word I'mlooking for, and the comfort is
there knowing that this womanloves you and that she wants to
(33:22):
be with you.
Well, you're also gonna have todeal with the family.
Keep in mind, if you're therefor two, I'm gonna say you're
only there for two weeks.
The two weeks are gonna be thebest weeks, two weeks of their
life, of her life, not theirlives.
Probably said that right, theirlives.
Because you're a man, you're aforeigner, you're coming from a
foreign country where they thinkmost men from different
countries are rich, anyways.
(33:42):
I'm black, I ain't rich.
Okay, I worked two jobs, I madegood money, and I only work the
second job because my kids aregetting older and they don't
want to be around daddy anymore,so whatever.
Yeah, that is what it is.
Yeah, if you got kids, you know.
But when I went there, um it'snot the fact that I had to lay
down ground rules, but I had totell her that hey, I'm only here
(34:06):
for you.
Um, um, she's got two kids.
I don't care about the kids.
If you're a person that doesn'twant kids or don't know how to
deal with kids right now,completely fine.
I'm not going to say most of thewomen over there are pregnant
because you just don't know.
My thing is, MJ, you need to dosome notes when you go over
there, though these women arejust so beautiful and small,
(34:28):
petite, or whatever, but it'spossible they can have kids, and
that's not a bad thing.
Uh, what I've learned in theculture of the Philippines is
that Jesus, um, the women had toprovide more than the men do.
Um, also, what I do want topoint out to you.
(34:48):
Don't talk politics in thePhilippines.
I don't know.
Don't if they say since thislast trip that I went to
Makatai, the guy was a hugesupporter of our president.
I was not.
I pretty much bashed ourpresident, but you can't say
anything about their presidentbecause that'll quickly get you
thrown in jail as a foreigner.
(35:11):
What I also learned is that ohcrap, I just had that thought
and I lost it.
Oh, what I also learned is thatmake sure the women that you're
messing with are not married.
If they are married and thehusband finds out, yo ass is
going to jail.
Even though they may not betogether, well, his family could
(35:34):
be like, oh, well, this guy, hisforeigner came in and broke up
our home, and the next thing youknow, you sit in the Filipino
jail trying to figure out whatthe hell I did.
Make sure she's also of legalage.
Okay.
I know 18 is a big thing, andyou know, they're younger and
hotter, whatever.
Not for me, it ain't.
No, hell no.
(35:55):
No.
I don't date well, I don't dateanybody um younger than 25.
Um, 18, they're young.
18.
Now, I'm not saying it as a badthing because as I've seen time
and time again, especiallywatching this damn show, 90 Day
Fiance, where this guy um metthis 19-year-old and he was down
(36:19):
near 60, and I was like, Whatthe hell is this?
I'm not saying that it's badbecause I gotta admit, they are
much more mature women overthere than they are in probably
here and maybe in some otherplaces that you mean.
Again, no shade on women in theUS.
I'm just saying they're muchmore mature.
(36:40):
If I had found the right womanover here, I probably wouldn't
be in the Philippines, but Itried.
I did one, two, three times,three strikes are out.
I tried, so I know I may getcriticism from it.
I may people might be like, ohwell, he didn't give it long
enough.
Trust me, I've been along arounda long time, and what dating was
back in the day is damn sure notwhat it is today.
(37:00):
So I hope when you go over here,you have a phenomenal trip.
Um, I'm not sure what your partylife is like or what the the
night the night scene life islike, but I didn't go to any of
the nightlife.
Um, it is very temptation of thenightlife depending in Cebu Cebu
has some of the most beautifulwomen I've ever seen.
But then again, that's all partof Philippines.
(37:22):
You have to understand they area one-culture country, and what
I mean by one culture country isthat they're not diverse as the
UK or the United States orCanada.
When you go to some of thesecountries that are just one
culture, meaning that it's justtheir culture and their people
there, it's different for them.
You know, seeing a foreigner islike seeing a celebrity.
(37:45):
You know, I remember I went overthere and I had my jersey, my
Mahomes jersey on.
They're like, Oh, PatrickMahomes, Taylor Swift.
I don't know him, but I heargood things.
I don't know any of thesepeople.
But when I went over there, Iwas treated with respect,
decency.
Um, almost got in trouble forvaping outside uh the room, the
hotel, um, the condo that wewere staying at, because
(38:07):
apparently you can't vape insome areas and you can't smoke,
and they'll surely tell youabout it.
But they give you a pass becauseyou're foreigner and they know
you're a foreigner.
So, um if you're going alone, doyour due diligence, do your
homework.
Your parents are going to beyour parents.
They probably want what's betterfor you because they don't
understand that finding love ishard in this day and age.
(38:30):
I'm not sure how long yourparents have been together.
Sounds like they've beentogether for a while, but
finding love in this day and ageis a hard thing to do.
It is really hard.
So if you have to go to anotherculture, another country, and
visit another woman, then hey,that's what you gotta do.
I mean, you tried.
You know, the sad thing is womenin the US are when I found when
(39:03):
I was telling people that I metsomebody in the Philippines, you
know, I immediately got flagged,oh, you can't find somebody
here, or the women over hereain't better enough.
And why is that?
You don't want me, so why areyou coming down on me?
You don't want me, so you can'tbe you can't be mad at me for
trying to find my happiness.
That's what I understand aboutthis.
With so much interracial uhrelationships, I don't
(39:24):
understand when a woman gets madat a man for seeing them with a
different woman of a differentrace.
I don't get it.
You don't want me.
I tried everything in my powerto be with you, but you don't
want me.
So I'm not gonna make you loveme, I'm not gonna pay for you to
love me.
You either take me as I am oryou don't take me at all.
So, MJ, I understand your pain.
(39:47):
I do, I get where you're comingfrom.
I think that you have to decidewhat's gonna work best for you.
You have to be happy in what youwant to be happy with.
Again, don't take a lot of cashover there, don't flash,
whatever, whatever you'rewherever room you're staying at.
If you decide to bring a femaleback to your room, please, these
(40:11):
places provide safe, lockeverything up.
I was hoping that you would tellme that you met somebody that
you're going to um try to talkto them and get with this one
person, but I understand yougotta kind of test the waters,
you gotta kind of see which oneis better for you.
I get that.
But there was a guy on YouTubethat did the exact thing um that
(40:32):
you did.
It was his first time overthere.
He went over there um with eyeswide open, didn't think didn't
blink or do a second thought.
He met one woman.
Um I think he stayed with herfor a couple days.
It didn't work because shewanted money.
He met another woman.
Um, that didn't work because heran out of money.
Uh well he the second womanwanted more money and was trying
(40:55):
to get him to take care of thefamily, so that didn't work.
The third woman that he met, uh,young lady, I think she was
either 19 or 20.
Well, she kind of lied.
She said that she didn't haveany kids.
Turns out she had a daughter.
But by that point in time, um,he had gotten this young girl
pregnant.
Uh, the young girl came uppregnant, not with one, but she
(41:15):
came up pregnant with two.
I kid you not.
They did it before and afterwith this guy.
He went over there lookinghealthy, and when he left there,
it looked like he was damn nearhad one foot in the grave and
one foot out.
I was like, oh my god, what thehell?
He had gotten himself sostressed out, so stressed out
for what you don't go over theretrying to flaunt money because
yes, women are gonna flock tomoney over there because they
(41:38):
see you as an opportunity to getout of the life that they're in
now.
So, I'm not saying that is badfor all women in the
Philippines.
Hell, you have that here in thestates, so it doesn't matter
where you go, what matters isthat you do your homework and
you try to get to know the womanto understand her and try to
figure out if she's gonna be theright one for you.
(42:01):
So, when you go over there, Ihope that when you go over
there, you are just diligent inyour understanding of the
culture, the women, and whatthese women want.
Now, if you're going to meetsome of these women's families,
um man, I would really challengeyou to just try to meet one and
try to go from there.
But you're gonna be overwhelmed.
I hope when you go over there,you're gonna not gonna be too
(42:22):
overwhelmed.
But if you don't have thisnotion of a plan that and set
some limits for yourself, you'regonna come back broke.
So at best, oh, let's see.
The first time I went, I think Itook about 3,000 US dollars,
only ended up spending half ofthat.
So you don't have to go overthere and just basically put out
(42:49):
for anybody that you comeacross.
You don't have to.
So there's going to be a lot oftemptation.
If the lady the women that youmeet have siblings and they're
older siblings, keep in mindwhen one walks away, the other
one's gonna try to shoot theirshot.
And that's the hard thing aboutit.
Because everybody wants to getout, everybody, and it's it's
sad because they're such abeautiful people, but the
(43:12):
country itself is just riddledwith corruption, chaos, and
well, not really chaos, but justcorruption.
Um, and I think you have thateverywhere you go, but you don't
really see it until you go to aplace like the Philippines.
Um, this is the only place whereI've actually been where I've
seen people drinking streetwater, or I've seen a homeless
mother sleeping on the sidewalkwith her baby on a cardboard.
(43:35):
It's that real.
And I know you guys think, well,what did you do?
What did what I did?
I gave her some money, I boughther some Jolly V.
Turns out Jolly V is like theirMcDonald's over there.
It's good.
Um, you get rice witheverything, you pretty much get
it.
I mean, they got pretty mucheverything we have, but the food
portions and the food rationsare different than what it is
here, probably in the US andwhat other countries that you
(43:57):
come across, because their foodis not grown with hormones, not
like here.
Um I would just encourage you toman.
I would just encourage you to dosome homework before you leave.
You didn't really give me adeparture date, but it's fine.
(44:20):
You said next year.
Um, if you want to keeplistening to the women on Smart
Girl Filipinas, it's fine.
I'm not telling you, notdeterring you from that.
I just say do your homework.
I have nothing against thesewomen, but then again, I think
they're speaking maybe 50-50 ofhalf-truth and have just
(44:43):
blatantly being just wow, justbad towards their women.
But then again, we do that here.
So I personally don't, becausethere's not a woman that I'd
like to call out to say, well,she's bad or she's this, that,
and the other.
I don't.
I've had some relationships thatafter my wife died, well, not
really relationships, I've hadsome experiences that didn't
(45:03):
work out too well for me aftermy wife died, and I just choose
to go a different way.
Now, um, that's not to say thatI don't come across good women,
but it's always hard to find agood one.
And the women that you find herein the US, when you find them,
you're thinking that, oh my god,this could be the one, or and
then you find out she's withsomebody who's like basically
(45:25):
doing her like wrong in everypossible way.
And I'm like, what the hell?
What the hell is this?
So, and then you want to try tobe a friend and try to without
overstepping any boundaries orwithout being what do they call
that, a third reel, or trying tobreak up a happy home, or in
this case, sometimes a homeain't happy.
(45:48):
Oh, but MJ, I think your heartis in the right space.
I think it's in the right place.
I think that you need to justtake it slow.
Um, you're going over there,you're gonna have a good time.
My advice to you again do yourhomework, set some limits for
(46:12):
yourself.
Try to figure out what it isthat you want.
You're overwhelmed.
I'm pretty sure if you havetalked to many women on this
site that you have been tellinga lot of women, well, I'm gonna
be here, or I'm gonna be there,I'm gonna be this place.
Come see me, or where I can comesee you.
It sounds like to me you'regonna have a busy schedule, but
before you make your way toCebu, I would probably limit
(46:35):
that circle.
Um, I would limit that circle tomaybe about shit.
I would probably say about maybefour, maybe five.
I don't know.
I just don't know how longyou're gonna be there.
I would simply just probablylimit it to probably two.
Um the the the bad thing is thatthey all have a story, and
(46:57):
majority, nine times out of ten,that story is actually real.
Um, I've met a woman before inthe Philippines that was kind of
deceitful.
Um, that she said, Well, ohwell, I love you.
And then here's the other thing: if you meet a woman and she's (47:11):
undefined
automatically talking aboutgreen card and marriage, red
flag, red freaking flag, becausethat's just telling you that oh,
she's there to get out.
Because here's here's a funnything.
I'm gonna share a story withyou.
When I met uh first Filipino onthe site, um I thought she was
genuine, and I think by maybethe fifth or sixth conversation,
(47:33):
we were already talking aboutgreen card and marriage, but
only to find out that when youget these females' numbers,
that's the bad thing about thesedamn phones and the algorithms.
Well, on Facebook, um, this wasa friend suggestion.
I was like, Wait, this chicklooked familiar, and I thought
for a minute, no, she couldn'tbe the one, but it sure enough,
(47:53):
it was the same chick that I wastalking to.
But the chick had another guy onthe on her page, and she was
talking to him, and was like,Well, I can't wait to come to
the US so I can meet you.
I don't know how true that wasbecause the post is very recent.
So, while it's kind of hard totry to fathom if these women are
(48:15):
real or not, I think these womenare doing uh I don't want to say
it in a bad way, but they'realso kind of testing their
waters to see who's real andwho's not.
Um, I would suggest if you don'thave kids, don't go over there
and try to get a girl pregnant,or not try, but use protection
because it sounds like to meyou're gonna be you're gonna be
(48:36):
a lot overwhelmed.
Very overwhelmed.
So, and I wasn't even mad at thefact that this woman did this to
me, I was just more hurt becauseI had a lot to learn about
online dating and datinginternationally.
Yes, you can't always see theone you're with.
(48:58):
Now you're probably gonna say,Well, what makes this woman
different?
Uh, and how can you trust her?
Okay, well, I can trust herbecause we talk on a daily
basis.
Number one, number two, um, whenI first went there, um, or when
I first started talking, she washonest about everything.
There are some things that Ifound out along the way that I
(49:19):
thought was a little bit kind ofdeceiving, but then again, I was
like, okay, well, and then herwillingness to contact me every
day.
And then the crazy thing is shenever asked for a single damn
dime of my money, didn't ask fora single dime.
And the woman that I met um wasstaying in Squattersville.
Again, Squattersville is justbasically a homeless camp that
(49:41):
are built up by um um they takeover, it's not really a
takeover, but they settle onproperty.
Um, they have cardboard shacksand a room that's probably no
bigger than a bathroom.
But we talked and we shared somethings, and she said some
things, and then when I wentover there to go meet her, it's
like the best thing ever.
(50:02):
And then after I left, we stillkept that same energy going, you
know.
I fell in love with her, I fellhard in love with her.
And sure, there's like a millionother women that in my DMs.
I mean, the minute I met thisyoung lady, I stayed on Filipino
cube for probably maybe about aweek or two, and then I was
like, you know what?
I think she's the one.
She had two kids, verybeautiful, very humble.
(50:25):
Um, she's always looking forwork.
Now, here's the other sad thing.
They tell you they're lookingfor work, that's because they
are, but the Philippines is notlike the US.
There, their dropout rate inschool is way more higher than
what we have here.
You have them dropping outprobably after elementary, and
that's because they have to payfor everything under the damn
(50:47):
sun.
You have to pay for water, youhave to pay for uh uh schooling,
school lunch.
There's no transportation, yougotta pay for transportation,
you gotta pay for uniform, yougotta pay for exams, you gotta
pay for them to take tests.
In all my years on this world,and like I said, this is my
first time going to thePhilippines.
Never heard of it, never heardof it.
(51:08):
And I'm like, damn, y'all payfor everything.
You can't even drink the waterover there.
So when you go over there, keepan open mind.
Um, if somebody does you dirty,don't get an attitude, don't go
ham.
You sound like you don't have atemper, you sound like you're
kind of laid back, like I am.
That's a good thing.
(51:29):
Keep being laid back.
Um, don't get into any fightsover there.
If somebody does you wrong,please, for your sake, just walk
the hell away.
Walk away again.
Make sure she's not married,make sure she's not seeing
anybody.
These are questions that youneed to ask up front.
Um when you ask these questions,if they say I don't know,
(51:52):
because like I said, some of thestuff that these women say on
Smart Girl Filipinas are isactually true.
If they say that they have anuncle, or I don't know.
I don't know how to explain it,but the fact of the matter is
you gotta be Leary.
And the crazy thing is there'sthere's way more women, way more
(52:15):
men and women over there thanmen, like a lot of women, and
that's the sad thing because themen over there aren't really
worth a damn.
I mean, I know we have thoseproblems, these problems here,
but we have course for shit likethat.
But over there, it's sodifferent, man.
It's different.
And the wires that you see onYouTube, that shit really is
(52:35):
like that.
It's like that.
So as we get ready to wrap thisshow up, um, Mr.
MJ, man.
I want to follow up.
I definitely want to follow up.
So I hope that this podcastfinds you well.
I hope that you take what I'msaying into consideration.
I am not always right 100% ofthe time, these are just my
(52:56):
experiences when I went overthere.
So they're my experiences, andthis is what I went what I went
through.
And my experiences were good,you know, because while I was
there and we went to I don'tknow what let me see if I can
find out what this thing called.
C shore, assume, assume I don'tknow what it is.
(53:17):
Some SC, I don't know, C shore,I don't know.
Let me hold on, see if I canfind it.
(53:37):
Okay, hold on.
Excuse me.
No, this isn't it.
It's not dreamplay, but we wentto Hang on, I'm getting it.
(54:05):
Okay, so this No, it wasn't thatone.
Star City.
You know what?
I can't for the life of me can'tfind this damn thing.
Even though I went there.
Uh oh, hold on.
(54:28):
Because we gotta get ready rightto show up.
Uh so it's I guess it's just oh,seaside.
Oh.
(54:49):
So it is the SM Mall of Asia.
So we went there, of course,they had like a theme park and a
whole bunch of other stuff.
It's called It was a BeautifulPlace.
So um, we went there, we had agood time, but as I said, and I
(55:09):
was there, and while I wasthere, there was a young lady
that came up to me, and she wasselling like like candy bars,
and she's like, I need money forstudies.
Can you buy a candy bar?
So, and then the other thing is,oh my god, this was so freaking
ridiculous.
The child, uh, we was in the inthe taxi, and a kid was washing
(55:30):
the window, like took a rag andjust washed the window, and then
my girl was like, hand him this,and we gave him some change
because I was like, Oh my god,this shit really happens here.
I mean, this would be frowned onin in our country.
She's like, Babe, really, yes,hell yeah, kid out here.
I mean, these are like littlekids, like seven or eight
washing car windows.
I mean, the traffic there isridiculous.
(55:52):
It's like the Indy 500 on acid,but oh my god.
In any event, I enjoyed my timewith the Philippines.
I enjoyed my time with thepeople, the culture, the food.
The food was good.
Um, of course, they eat a lot oframen noodles, which is called
pen panchet, panchet noodles,but hey, whatever, it's good.
Um, it was good.
(56:13):
So I'll do a follow-up show tomy um second trip in the
Philippines, which I had areally good time.
The flight, I'm not sure whereyou're coming from, but it's a
14-hour flight from where I'mat.
Um, but it was good.
So, MJ, I hope this podcastfinds you well.
I hope that you go to and havefun.
(56:36):
I hope that you don't doanything stupid or silly that's
gonna get you locked up abroadbecause I don't know, uh, you
are white, so the governmentmight take pity on you and be
like, Yeah, we need him back.
I'm kidding, I'm joking.
But as I said, my friend, um, Ihope this finds you well.
(56:56):
And for those of my listeners,if you're tuned in, listening,
watching me, you have questions,concerns, comment, please feel
free to email me at d6mpire357at gmail.com.
I am on buzzfrouts uh.com.
The show is called uh the D6Empire The Family.
(57:17):
I am also on IG, TikTok, I amicon, and you can find me and
follow me there.
I don't know how well I can postthe links on this site here,
Buzzcast, because I thoughtBuzzcast and Buzzrouts were the
same people.
Clearly, they are not, but hey,whatever.
In any event, I want to thankall my listeners for uh
(57:39):
listening.
I want to thank the supportersthat supporting me and that
you're coming through with theletters because let's be honest,
I only do this because I likedoing it, it's fun.
I don't talk about celebritythings, I don't talk about
politics because it's not me.
I'm an average person like you,and I'm just here just to maybe
I can make somebody's lifebetter.
And if you like the content, youlike it.
(58:00):
If you don't, you don't.
It's up to you.
But I welcome all kinds of formsof criticism, compliments,
whatever.
Um, episodes drop everyWednesday.
Um, so if you want to follow meagain, my podcast is streaming
anywhere you listen to podcasts: Amazon, Spotify, iTunes, uh, FM (58:16):
undefined
Podcasts, Ditzler, whatever.
Any place you could stream.
I'm also globallyinternationally known.
No, I'm just joking.
But in any event, MJ, we'regonna get ready to get out of
here.
Thanks for the letter.
Appreciate the letter.
(58:37):
Hope this uh helps you on yourway and your journey.
But as I encourage you to do, Iwould encourage you to get on
YouTube, look at some videos,some up-to-date videos, maybe of
this year or a year, and justtry to figure out what's gonna
be good for you.
So, if this is your firstexperience going to the
Philippines, I wish you well, Iwish you nothing but the best.
I hope you find your happiness,I hope you find your peace, I
(58:59):
hope everything is going to begood for you.
So, until next time, my friends,you guys take care of yourself
and each other.
But for right now, we got onemore track called Witness by T
Cleaf, and we're just gonnagroove with that as we get ready
to take the show out.
Until next time, guys, take careof yourself and each other.
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