June 9, 2025 • 13 mins
Ever poured hours into a project only to watch it get worse, not better? That frustrating cycle of diminishing returns might be fueled by a deeply-held belief that's actually holding you back.
Growing up, I absorbed my father's working-class ethos that hard work—defined by time spent, effort exerted, and suffering endured—was the only path to success. This belief followed me through school and into my career, where I'd routinely second-guess myself, redo perfectly good work until it deteriorated, and eventually develop unhealthy procrastination habits. The breaking point came when I witnessed a colleague working 70-hour weeks with additional staff and still falling behind. That's when I realized I was trapped in the same pattern.
The transformation began when I started trusting my instincts, setting shorter timelines, and evaluating work at the halfway mark. Surprisingly, 95% of the time, my initial work needed no changes. This wasn't just about working smarter—it was about recognizing that our limiting beliefs often protect us in some way, even as they sabotage our success. My belief about hard work made me feel worthy and shielded me from the fear of not being enough.
This mindset shift extends beyond personal productivity to how we approach tools like artificial intelligence. Many fundraisers resist AI because they value human connection, but what if technology isn't the barrier between you and your donors? What if it's actually the solution that clears away administrative burdens so you can be more present in those relationships?
Ready to identify which beliefs are holding you back? Download our free "AI for Major Gift Fundraisers" cheat sheet with five simple prompts to help you reclaim your time and focus on what truly matters. Visit downloads.letstalkfundraising.com/AIprompts to get started today.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Keith Greer, CFRE (00:05):
Hey, there, hi, and welcome back.
I'm traveling this week, so I'mrecording this episode from my
hotel room.
I hope that the audio is stillokay, but I had a flurry of
inspiration so I wanted to getthis episode out to you without
delay.
And I want to ask you somethinghave you ever worked twice as
hard only to get half theresults?
Have you ever worked twice ashard only to get half the
(00:25):
results?
Ever poured hours intosomething, reworking it,
refining it, obsessing overevery little detail, just to
feel like it got worse, notbetter?
I used to think that the moretime I spent on a task, the more
valuable it was.
That hard work, the grinding,the sweating, the stretching
into the late hours, was theonly work that mattered.
(00:47):
But that belief, it, stoleyears of my life and it made me
worse at my job, not better.
Today I want to talk about thebeliefs we carry that hold us
back, the ones that sound noble,that feel responsible, that
maybe even come from someone welove, but that, if we're honest,
they're not helping anymore.
(01:09):
And by the end of this episode,you're going to name one belief
that's keeping you stuck, butyou're going to understand where
it came from and I'm going togive you a way to let it go and
replace it with something thatactually moves you forward.
So take a breath, because thisone's personal and it might just
change how you work and how youlive.
All right, let's talkfundraising.
(01:34):
I want to start with a storyMine.
When I was a kid, my dad usedto say if you finished it that
fast, it probably isn't verygood, and he didn't mean it to
hurt me.
Finished it that fast, itprobably isn't very good, and he
didn't mean it to hurt me.
He came from a working classfamily.
His mom was a nurse in the burnunit and his dad was a police
officer.
In his family.
Hard work was survival, effortwas everything.
(01:56):
So that belief got passed to meSubtly, steadily, and I
absorbed it like gospel.
Hard work is the most valuablekind of work, not smart work,
not effective work, just hard.
So even when I did somethingwell on the first try, got an A
on a project, I was told Ishould have gone back and made
(02:18):
it better, that if I'd workedharder it could have been an A+.
And guess what?
I started second-guessing myinstincts.
I'd redo A-quality work overand over and over again and my
grades actually got worse andthat made no sense to me.
Eventually that turned intoprocrastination.
(02:39):
I figured if I didn't have timeto redo something I couldn't
ruin it.
So I'd wait until the lastminute, sprint through a 10-page
paper and turn it in Exhausted,stressed, jittery, but somehow
still getting top marks.
But when I got into theworkforce that strategy started
falling apart.
(02:59):
I had a boss who hated mylast-minute tendencies, so I
tried doing things earlier.
But because I still believedhard work meant more time, more
effort, more revisions, Istarted overworking the early
drafts and again my qualitydropped.
And it was all so frustratinguntil I had a moment that
(03:19):
changed everything.
I watched a co-worker workherself into the ground.
She was putting in 70 hourweeks, gave up nights and
weekends and she still couldn'tget ahead.
They brought in an assistant,then an intern.
Now they had three people doingover 130 combined hours a week
and the output didn't change.
(03:40):
And that kind of hit me hard.
Like I realized I'm doing thesame thing, just wearing a
different version of it.
I was spending more time onwork that didn't need it, and
when I didn't have time I did mybest work anyway.
So I flipped it.
Now I give myself shortertimelines.
I trust my first instincts.
(04:01):
I hold projects until thehalfway mark on the calendar and
then I ask myself is it good?
If the answer is yes, I turn itin.
If not, I've got time to twerk.
I mean, I've got time to tweak.
Oh my gosh, I'm keeping that inand I'm not editing it out.
That was fun.
So yeah, I've still got time totweak it.
(04:24):
And you want to know somethingwild?
95% of the time I don't need tochange a thing, and my boss,
they're happy with it too.
So let me ask you what's onebelief you're holding that's
making your life harder than itneeds to be?
And it might sound noble and itmight feel familiar, but is it
(04:45):
helping or is it holding youback?
So now that you've named thatbelief, the one that might be
keeping you stuck, let's getcurious about where it came from
.
Because these beliefs, theydon't just show up out of
nowhere.
You didn't just decide one dayto make your life harder.
These ideas, they were taught tous, they're passed down,
(05:08):
they're absorbed from the peoplearound us, and it's usually
with the best of intentions thatwe get them.
Maybe it was a parent whopraised you only when you got
everything right.
A teacher who told youfundraising would never pay the
bills.
A boss who praised you forsleeping on the floor of the
copy room to get a mailing outthe door burning you out.
But they called it going aboveand beyond.
(05:30):
Or maybe it was the culturearound you.
What you saw, celebrated,promoted or put on a pedestal
and at some point you started tobelieve it.
And this is how the world works.
This is how I stay safe, thisis how I prove I belong.
So let's slow it down for asecond.
I want you to bring that beliefyou identified a few minutes
(05:52):
ago back into your mind.
And I want you to bring thatbelief you identified a few
minutes ago back into your mindand I want you to ask yourself,
gently but honestly where didthis idea come from?
Who taught it to you?
What moment planted that seed?
And just sit with it for amoment.
But once you can trace the root, you get to decide if you still
want it to grow.
But once you can trace the root, you get to decide if you still
(06:14):
want it to grow.
Now here's where it gets alittle tricky, because even when
a belief is holding you back,you're holding onto it for a
reason, and that reason it'sprobably protecting something.
See, every belief, especiallythe limiting ones, serve us in
some way.
That's why we can't let go ofthem so easily.
(06:35):
They give us a sense of controlor safety or identity, even
when they're making us miserable.
For me, that belief about hardwork it made me feel worthy.
If I worked harder thaneveryone else, I was more
valuable.
If I earned my results throughexhaustion, I could be proud of
them.
And if I failed, well, at leastwhen no one could say I didn't
(06:58):
give it everything I had, it wasprotecting me from judgment,
from shame, from the fear that Iwasn't enough unless I was
always trying harder.
So now I want you to askyourself how is this belief
serving you?
So now I want you to askyourself how is this belief
serving you?
What does it give you?
What are you protecting byholding on to it?
And here's the magic partthere's no shame in this answer.
(07:22):
It's okay that you've beencarrying this belief because it
makes total sense.
But now that you see it, youget to choose.
You get to ask is this beliefstill helping me become who I
want to be?
And if the answer is no, well,that means you're ready for the
next step.
(07:44):
So is it time?
Only you can answer that.
But let's be real.
If this belief is keeping youin cycles of stress, burnout,
self-doubt or procrastination,if it's making you resent your
work or questioning your talentor feel like you're never enough
, then maybe it's time to loosenyour grip.
(08:04):
And let me ask you who wouldyou be without that belief?
How would you show up?
What kind of work would you doand what kind of life would you
build?
And you don't have to know thefull answer.
You don't need a five-year plan, but you do need a willingness
(08:25):
to try something different.
And just for a minute, I want towalk you through a little
exercise.
If you're driving or in a placewhere it's not safe to close
your eyes, skip this part andcome back to it later.
I promise it'll still be here,but if you can go ahead and
close your eyes, take a breathand picture yourself free of
(08:51):
that old belief.
Now I want you to imagine whatyour life looks like without it,
the one that's been weighing onyou, the one that makes things
harder than they need to be.
Just picture yourself fullyreleased from it.
How do you move through yourday?
How do you show up to your work?
(09:13):
What's different about the wayyou make decisions, the way you
connect with people, the way youfeel at the end of a long week?
Do you have more time, moreclarity?
Do you feel lighter, moreconfident, more creative?
(09:33):
Let yourself feel that versionof you, the one who's no longer
bound by a belief that doesn'tserve you anymore.
That version of you is not faraway.
It's already in you, waitingfor the space to emerge.
So take one more deep breathand, when you're ready, open
your eyes.
Welcome back Now.
(09:55):
Here's the best part you don'thave to let the current version
of you go all at once.
You can loosen your grip littleby little, try a new way and
see what happens.
Start by naming the belief thatyou've been holding on to.
Say it out loud, write it down.
Something like if I don't workmyself to exhaustion, I'm not
(10:19):
doing enough.
Or maybe I always have tofigure it out alone.
Next, ask yourself what beliefwould actually support me now.
What's a truth that you'reready to move into?
Something like my best workhappens when I trust myself and
I take care of my energy.
Or it's okay to ask for helpand use the tools available to
(10:42):
me, and you know what.
That last one is a big one for alot of people I talk to,
especially when it comes tousing new tools like artificial
intelligence, and I'll hearpeople say things like I don't
want to use AI because I likeworking with my donors, and I
get that deeply.
But what if AI isn't aboutreplacing the relationships,
(11:05):
it's about making space for them.
It's about making space forthem.
So, instead of drowning in theadministrative part of the job,
you're showing up fully presentfor the people who matter most.
That shift, that mindset, is abelief upgrade too.
So let that sink in, let itfeel like it's possible, and
(11:26):
let's stay with this idea forjust a minute.
Letting go of old beliefs isn'tjust about the internal stuff.
It shows up in how we approachthe tools, the systems and even
the technology that we use everyday.
And I want to say this gentlybut honestly one of the biggest
belief blocks I see in our fieldright now is around AI.
I talk to fundraisers all thetime who say I love my work
(11:50):
because of the people.
I don't want some computergetting in the way of that.
And I hear that and I felt itat first, but I want to offer
you this reframe.
What if AI isn't the thingstanding between you and your
donors?
What if it's the thing thatgets all the other stuff out of
the way, so that you canactually be present with them?
(12:12):
What if AI could write thefirst draft of that stewardship
email, summarize a meeting youforgot to take notes in help you
prepare for a donor call, sothat you walk into it feeling
confident and not scattered?
I actually put togethersomething for you, because I
know this shift is hard whenyou're trying to figure it out
alone.
It's a free cheat sheet calledAI for Major Gift Fundraisers,
(12:34):
and it gives you five simpleprompts that you can use right
away.
No jargon, no techie overwhelm,just small ways to let AI
handle the background noise, soyou can lean fully into the
parts of this work that only youcan do.
And you can grab it right nowfor free at
downloadsletstalkfundraisingcom.
(12:56):
Forward slash AI prompts and Iknow that's a long title, so
I'll make sure to leave a linkto it in the show notes.
But try it out, see what happens.
You don't have to believe it infull right away, you just have
to believe it enough to trysomething new, and that's what
this whole episode has beenabout.
(13:16):
Right, letting go, tryingsomething different and choosing
a belief that serves you betterthan the one that you're
outgrowing.
So, before we go, I want to askyou one more thing what's the
belief that you're letting go oftoday and what's the new one
you're choosing instead?
Write it down, speak it outloud and start living into it,
(13:41):
one small moment at a time,because you're not stuck, you're
not behind.
You're just growing and you'redoing a beautiful job.
All right, my friend, I'll seeyou in the next episode.
Hey, there, hi, and welcome back.
I'm traveling this week, so I'mrecording this episode from my
hotel room.
I hope that the audio is stillokay, but I had a flurry of
inspiration so I wanted to getthis episode out to you without
delay.
And I want to ask you somethinghave you ever worked twice as
hard only to get half theresults?
Have you ever worked twice ashard only to get half the
(00:25):
results?
Ever poured hours intosomething, reworking it,
refining it, obsessing overevery little detail, just to
feel like it got worse, notbetter?
I used to think that the moretime I spent on a task, the more
valuable it was.
That hard work, the grinding,the sweating, the stretching
into the late hours, was theonly work that mattered.
(00:47):
But that belief, it, stoleyears of my life and it made me
worse at my job, not better.
Today I want to talk about thebeliefs we carry that hold us
back, the ones that sound noble,that feel responsible, that
maybe even come from someone welove, but that, if we're honest,
they're not helping anymore.
(01:09):
And by the end of this episode,you're going to name one belief
that's keeping you stuck, butyou're going to understand where
it came from and I'm going togive you a way to let it go and
replace it with something thatactually moves you forward.
So take a breath, because thisone's personal and it might just
change how you work and how youlive.
All right, let's talkfundraising.
(01:34):
I want to start with a storyMine.
When I was a kid, my dad usedto say if you finished it that
fast, it probably isn't verygood, and he didn't mean it to
hurt me.
Finished it that fast, itprobably isn't very good, and he
didn't mean it to hurt me.
He came from a working classfamily.
His mom was a nurse in the burnunit and his dad was a police
officer.
In his family.
Hard work was survival, effortwas everything.
(01:56):
So that belief got passed to meSubtly, steadily, and I
absorbed it like gospel.
Hard work is the most valuablekind of work, not smart work,
not effective work, just hard.
So even when I did somethingwell on the first try, got an A
on a project, I was told Ishould have gone back and made
(02:18):
it better, that if I'd workedharder it could have been an A+.
And guess what?
I started second-guessing myinstincts.
I'd redo A-quality work overand over and over again and my
grades actually got worse andthat made no sense to me.
Eventually that turned intoprocrastination.
(02:39):
I figured if I didn't have timeto redo something I couldn't
ruin it.
So I'd wait until the lastminute, sprint through a 10-page
paper and turn it in Exhausted,stressed, jittery, but somehow
still getting top marks.
But when I got into theworkforce that strategy started
falling apart.
(02:59):
I had a boss who hated mylast-minute tendencies, so I
tried doing things earlier.
But because I still believedhard work meant more time, more
effort, more revisions, Istarted overworking the early
drafts and again my qualitydropped.
And it was all so frustratinguntil I had a moment that
(03:19):
changed everything.
I watched a co-worker workherself into the ground.
She was putting in 70 hourweeks, gave up nights and
weekends and she still couldn'tget ahead.
They brought in an assistant,then an intern.
Now they had three people doingover 130 combined hours a week
and the output didn't change.
(03:40):
And that kind of hit me hard.
Like I realized I'm doing thesame thing, just wearing a
different version of it.
I was spending more time onwork that didn't need it, and
when I didn't have time I did mybest work anyway.
So I flipped it.
Now I give myself shortertimelines.
I trust my first instincts.
(04:01):
I hold projects until thehalfway mark on the calendar and
then I ask myself is it good?
If the answer is yes, I turn itin.
If not, I've got time to twerk.
I mean, I've got time to tweak.
Oh my gosh, I'm keeping that inand I'm not editing it out.
That was fun.
So yeah, I've still got time totweak it.
(04:24):
And you want to know somethingwild?
95% of the time I don't need tochange a thing, and my boss,
they're happy with it too.
So let me ask you what's onebelief you're holding that's
making your life harder than itneeds to be?
And it might sound noble and itmight feel familiar, but is it
(04:45):
helping or is it holding youback?
So now that you've named thatbelief, the one that might be
keeping you stuck, let's getcurious about where it came from
.
Because these beliefs, theydon't just show up out of
nowhere.
You didn't just decide one dayto make your life harder.
These ideas, they were taught tous, they're passed down,
(05:08):
they're absorbed from the peoplearound us, and it's usually
with the best of intentions thatwe get them.
Maybe it was a parent whopraised you only when you got
everything right.
A teacher who told youfundraising would never pay the
bills.
A boss who praised you forsleeping on the floor of the
copy room to get a mailing outthe door burning you out.
But they called it going aboveand beyond.
(05:30):
Or maybe it was the culturearound you.
What you saw, celebrated,promoted or put on a pedestal
and at some point you started tobelieve it.
And this is how the world works.
This is how I stay safe, thisis how I prove I belong.
So let's slow it down for asecond.
I want you to bring that beliefyou identified a few minutes
(05:52):
ago back into your mind.
And I want you to bring thatbelief you identified a few
minutes ago back into your mindand I want you to ask yourself,
gently but honestly where didthis idea come from?
Who taught it to you?
What moment planted that seed?
And just sit with it for amoment.
But once you can trace the root, you get to decide if you still
want it to grow.
But once you can trace the root, you get to decide if you still
(06:14):
want it to grow.
Now here's where it gets alittle tricky, because even when
a belief is holding you back,you're holding onto it for a
reason, and that reason it'sprobably protecting something.
See, every belief, especiallythe limiting ones, serve us in
some way.
That's why we can't let go ofthem so easily.
(06:35):
They give us a sense of controlor safety or identity, even
when they're making us miserable.
For me, that belief about hardwork it made me feel worthy.
If I worked harder thaneveryone else, I was more
valuable.
If I earned my results throughexhaustion, I could be proud of
them.
And if I failed, well, at leastwhen no one could say I didn't
(06:58):
give it everything I had, it wasprotecting me from judgment,
from shame, from the fear that Iwasn't enough unless I was
always trying harder.
So now I want you to askyourself how is this belief
serving you?
So now I want you to askyourself how is this belief
serving you?
What does it give you?
What are you protecting byholding on to it?
And here's the magic partthere's no shame in this answer.
(07:22):
It's okay that you've beencarrying this belief because it
makes total sense.
But now that you see it, youget to choose.
You get to ask is this beliefstill helping me become who I
want to be?
And if the answer is no, well,that means you're ready for the
next step.
(07:44):
So is it time?
Only you can answer that.
But let's be real.
If this belief is keeping youin cycles of stress, burnout,
self-doubt or procrastination,if it's making you resent your
work or questioning your talentor feel like you're never enough
, then maybe it's time to loosenyour grip.
(08:04):
And let me ask you who wouldyou be without that belief?
How would you show up?
What kind of work would you doand what kind of life would you
build?
And you don't have to know thefull answer.
You don't need a five-year plan, but you do need a willingness
(08:25):
to try something different.
And just for a minute, I want towalk you through a little
exercise.
If you're driving or in a placewhere it's not safe to close
your eyes, skip this part andcome back to it later.
I promise it'll still be here,but if you can go ahead and
close your eyes, take a breathand picture yourself free of
(08:51):
that old belief.
Now I want you to imagine whatyour life looks like without it,
the one that's been weighing onyou, the one that makes things
harder than they need to be.
Just picture yourself fullyreleased from it.
How do you move through yourday?
How do you show up to your work?
(09:13):
What's different about the wayyou make decisions, the way you
connect with people, the way youfeel at the end of a long week?
Do you have more time, moreclarity?
Do you feel lighter, moreconfident, more creative?
(09:33):
Let yourself feel that versionof you, the one who's no longer
bound by a belief that doesn'tserve you anymore.
That version of you is not faraway.
It's already in you, waitingfor the space to emerge.
So take one more deep breathand, when you're ready, open
your eyes.
Welcome back Now.
(09:55):
Here's the best part you don'thave to let the current version
of you go all at once.
You can loosen your grip littleby little, try a new way and
see what happens.
Start by naming the belief thatyou've been holding on to.
Say it out loud, write it down.
Something like if I don't workmyself to exhaustion, I'm not
(10:19):
doing enough.
Or maybe I always have tofigure it out alone.
Next, ask yourself what beliefwould actually support me now.
What's a truth that you'reready to move into?
Something like my best workhappens when I trust myself and
I take care of my energy.
Or it's okay to ask for helpand use the tools available to
(10:42):
me, and you know what.
That last one is a big one for alot of people I talk to,
especially when it comes tousing new tools like artificial
intelligence, and I'll hearpeople say things like I don't
want to use AI because I likeworking with my donors, and I
get that deeply.
But what if AI isn't aboutreplacing the relationships,
(11:05):
it's about making space for them.
It's about making space forthem.
So, instead of drowning in theadministrative part of the job,
you're showing up fully presentfor the people who matter most.
That shift, that mindset, is abelief upgrade too.
So let that sink in, let itfeel like it's possible, and
(11:26):
let's stay with this idea forjust a minute.
Letting go of old beliefs isn'tjust about the internal stuff.
It shows up in how we approachthe tools, the systems and even
the technology that we use everyday.
And I want to say this gentlybut honestly one of the biggest
belief blocks I see in our fieldright now is around AI.
I talk to fundraisers all thetime who say I love my work
(11:50):
because of the people.
I don't want some computergetting in the way of that.
And I hear that and I felt itat first, but I want to offer
you this reframe.
What if AI isn't the thingstanding between you and your
donors?
What if it's the thing thatgets all the other stuff out of
the way, so that you canactually be present with them?
(12:12):
What if AI could write thefirst draft of that stewardship
email, summarize a meeting youforgot to take notes in help you
prepare for a donor call, sothat you walk into it feeling
confident and not scattered?
I actually put togethersomething for you, because I
know this shift is hard whenyou're trying to figure it out
alone.
It's a free cheat sheet calledAI for Major Gift Fundraisers,
(12:34):
and it gives you five simpleprompts that you can use right
away.
No jargon, no techie overwhelm,just small ways to let AI
handle the background noise, soyou can lean fully into the
parts of this work that only youcan do.
And you can grab it right nowfor free at
downloadsletstalkfundraisingcom.
(12:56):
Forward slash AI prompts and Iknow that's a long title, so
I'll make sure to leave a linkto it in the show notes.
But try it out, see what happens.
You don't have to believe it infull right away, you just have
to believe it enough to trysomething new, and that's what
this whole episode has beenabout.
(13:16):
Right, letting go, tryingsomething different and choosing
a belief that serves you betterthan the one that you're
outgrowing.
So, before we go, I want to askyou one more thing what's the
belief that you're letting go oftoday and what's the new one
you're choosing instead?
Write it down, speak it outloud and start living into it,
(13:41):
one small moment at a time,because you're not stuck, you're
not behind.
You're just growing and you'redoing a beautiful job.
All right, my friend, I'll seeyou in the next episode.
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