January 1, 2025 • 27 mins
Bridget Cook-Burch, a New York Times & Wall Street Journal Best-selling author, writing mentor, and speaker, as well as the CEO and Founder of Inspired Legacy Publishing, shares the details of her near death experience, what she learned from writing about gang members and serial killers, the power of story, the joy of fish mongering, having passion to your persistence, and why legacy is in the name of ALL of her businesses.
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Gary Michels (00:00):
Welcome to Let's Talk Legacy. I'm really excited
(00:03):
about our next guest, BridgetCook-Burch. Bridget is a New
York Times and Wall StreetJournal, best selling author
writing mentor and speaker, aswell as the CEO and founder of
YourInspiredStory.com andInspired Legacy Publishing,
whose greatest passion ishelping others to discover the
importance of their own storyand to become leaders in their
(00:26):
own communities worldwide. Sowelcome to our show.
Bridget Cook-Burch (00:29):
I'm so delighted to be here. I love
your premise. I love what youstand for, and I'm excited for
our talk today.
Gary Michels (00:35):
Let's jump right in with a moment that really
changed your life, which Iunderstand was a near death
experience for you?
Bridget Cook-Burch (00:43):
Yes, well, for a long time I didn't talk
about it because it was such asacred and bewildering
experience to me. But now Ishare it quite frequently
because it happens to morepeople than you think. But for
me, it was so extraordinarybecause, you know, I was in the
hospital, I'm listening tonurses outside in the corridor,
and they're saying she's notgoing to make it until morning.
(01:06):
And so I just had the mostextraordinary sadness, because I
knew I had not fulfilled themeasure of my creation. I just
knew I didn't know what I washere for. I was working three
jobs, going to school, likeworking myself to the bone,
which is why I was in thehospital, and here I am unable
to get better. And what wedidn't know was one of the
(01:26):
medications they were giving mewas killing me. So I came in
sick and got sicker, and then Ihad this extraordinary presence
that filled my room with so muchunconditional love Gary that it
changed my whole world. And Iwas I was told I was being given
a second chance at life. And Iwoke up and they had been giving
(01:49):
me intravenous antibiotics inwhat's called a subclavian and
the heart, because I was soemaciated, I couldn't have a
regular IV. And I picked out tothe nurse, I said, I can have
all of these, but I can't havethis one. And she looked at me
like I was crazy. She was like,this is the only thing saving
your life. We thought you weregoing to die. And I said, No,
(02:10):
seriously, this one's killingme. The rest of these I can
have. Well, she looked at melike I was a French fresh eye of
a happy meal, that's for sure,right? She refused to take me
off of it, but I was so adamantthat she went to speak to the
doctor. And fortunately, he'dhad other patients who'd had
these type of experiences. Andso he said, Well, I think we
(02:32):
better listen to this. We cantake her off. She's on the rest
of these, and we'll see how shedoes. And 24 hours later, I
walked out of the hospital andon my own power. So it was a
profound experience.
Gary Michels (02:44):
Wow, wow. And so through that experience, you
learn the power of a story, thatif you can change your story,
you can change your life. Sowhat sort of things did you
start telling yourself to regaincontrol of your own narrative?
Bridget Cook-Burch (03:01):
What was fascinating when I got out of
the hospital, you know, I had alot of fixed beliefs about
myself, so I'd been adopted. Ihad three sets of parents. By
the time I was six months old, Iwas always waiting for the big
people to go away, you know,like I could only trust so much,
and I was fairly independent,because I I just, I didn't feel
supported until the hospital,and suddenly it was like, Oh, I
(03:24):
can't tell that same story. It'snot true. And all of a sudden, I
was able to look into the eyes,well, my own eyes, for the first
time, and see love there. Thatwas extraordinary. But then as I
went out into the world, Iwasn't afraid of people anymore.
I could look into the eyes ofanyone like I can see real
(03:44):
people, and I can see potential,and I see who they are without
their story, and I also see theimportance of their story to
them. And so just working withthem to disentangle sometimes
fixed beliefs from from thosethat are, that are the truth for
them is really beenextraordinary.
Gary Michels (04:05):
As you've been successful as a storyteller and
writer, you've had severalnational best sellers, including
Divine Turbulence, The WitnessWore Red, Shattered Silence, and
there's been others. How did yougo through this whole process of
putting this on paper andputting into a story?
Bridget Cook-Burch (04:22):
Well, it's a little miraculous, that's for
sure. In my estimation, thefirst book that I went to write,
I was so taken with the lessonsof gang kids. You know, they
came from different worlds thanI did, and I was so fascinated
by who they were and what theyhad experienced already, so
young, and then where they wereheaded, and I thought, wouldn't
(04:44):
it be great to write a story ofredemption? Right? So a kid
really gets in a lot of trouble,the blood in, blood out,
mentality, like you have tospill blood to get in and and
you can't get out. And that'swhat was happening in Denver at
the time, as I was working withthese kids. And. What if you
could be forgiven in yourcommunity, forgive yourself and
(05:06):
feel like you could be forgivenby God, like, what? What could
happen then? And so I wasplaying with this idea. Was
writing some things, but onenight, in the middle of the
night, I had a dream, and I hadcharacter scenes, plots. I say I
even had eye color, because it'strue, I wrote. I wrote for
hours, like from two o'clock inthe morning until about 10. I
wrote this whole novel out,thinking it was fiction, and
(05:30):
then I had to do some research,because a lot of the kids that I
worked with in Denver wereNuestra Familia and the Bloods
and the Crips and, you know,some of the local gangs. But in
my dream, it was a skinhead. Andso I was like, well, that's
fascinating, you know? So I, Ihad to do some research, and I
come across this guy's website,a former skinhead. Everything
(05:51):
Gary that he had written abouthis life, everything that I had
written about in my fictionalnovel, were in Dan. It was
crazy. Wow. There were so manythings that were the same that
I'm like, this is the guy. Andthen he said, I'm looking for
someone to write my life story.If you know of anyone, have them
call me. And I thought he's gotto think I'm crazy. Who is this
(06:13):
crazy? Whack, a woman. But I didcall him, and his story was
different than my novel, but thebig, main turning points were
all the same. And so that's why,to me, it felt really
miraculous. A young woman readhis story, and she said, I think
if there's a writer who couldtake a story of so much darkness
(06:34):
but create hope and healing, itwould be you. And then she said,
I'm the daughter of the happyface serial killer. Would you
write my life story and Gary, Igotta tell you, I I was so
floored, I did not know what todo in that moment. I kind of
like, How in the world could youever write an inspiring, love
filled story about the daughterof a serial killer? But we did.
(06:57):
Her dad was always weird, but hewas also the Savior. So there
was this like pendulum swing ofbehavior with him. So part of
him was the Savior that wouldcome into town and fill her poor
mother's cupboards with food andbuy her blue jeans, right, and
the things that a teenager needsand sustenance. And so he was
(07:18):
the Savior in some regards, andthen in other things, you know,
we always had these detectivenovels, and you know, duct tape
in his in his truck. But everytrucker has duct tape. You know,
there were things that she neverput together in her mind.
Because, why and how would youever do that? You wouldn't write
about your own, your own parent.But when she found out, it was
(07:40):
very life shattering. It wasdifficult too, because when we
came out with the book, therewere people that were saying,
you know, you're benefiting fromyour father's killing, and
usually those were the victimsfamilies, but when they read her
story, there was so much healingthat took place. Because, you
know, no one had ever written abook like this before.
Gary Michels (08:00):
And she's successful now, you said she's a
successful producer, right?
Bridget Cook-Burch (08:03):
She is incredibly successful. She's
created a lot of shows on A & Eand other beautiful cable
networks, and she's known forbringing compassion to to true
crime. So she did one calledmonster in my family, and she
brought together victimsfamilies as well as the serial
killers families, so like theBoston bomber and others that
(08:25):
they were able to come togetherand understand each other and
heal.
Gary Michels (08:29):
Gosh, that's crazy. That's crazy good.
Bridget Cook-Burch (08:31):
Crazy amazing.
Gary Michels (08:33):
So your storytelling is such an
important part of leaving alegacy, that's so much in our
company is called SouthwesternLegacy Insurance Group, and it's
all about, what are you doing toleave behind for others and your
actions today? And it's not justmoney and leaving money behind.
It's your, it's everything thatyou're leaving behind.
Bridget Cook-Burch (08:54):
Gary, I've got to tell you, I've had three
businesses in my lifetime thathave legacy in them. My
publishing company is InspiredLegacy Publishing and Inspired
Legacy LLC is my overarchingbusiness. I think we have a lot
in common.
Gary Michels (09:10):
I love it. Love it. So why is story more
important than money or amonument or an award?
Bridget Cook-Burch (09:18):
You know, we have been telling stories since
the dawn of time. You know, wefirst began with with sticks and
and petroglyphs, right and anddrum beats and other things, but
around campfires, we have beenusing the power of story and
then words and language as itcame about, ever since the dawn
(09:41):
of time, and it's how we learnroles. It's how we learn to
relate to one another. It's it'show we learn the heroes and she
rose journey, you know, which isvery cyclical, and some of us
will be on three or four ofthose in our lifetime,
especially if we're adventurous.But I will tell you that. Uh,
the power of story, especiallythe stories that we love and
(10:04):
believe in, really dictate whatwe manifest and choose to create
in the world. Because if webelieve to our core that we're
not enough, that the world is anunsafe place, that life sucks,
that there's never enough money,that there's, you know, we we
believe those things, we moveforward in life as if that is
(10:26):
true for us, and we will findthat truth wherever we go if we
choose to believe that the worldis great and that there's messy
people, but the world isinherently great and there's
goodness in everyone, and thatthere is something for us to
learn every single day, and thatthere is a beautiful legacy that
we can leave the world. Then webegin to act accordingly. We
(10:50):
begin to manage our behaviors ina different way. We do all kinds
of things we wouldn't do if webelieved the world was rotten,
and by believing that the worldis good, we create incredible
miracles each individual. AndI've seen it over and over and
so those are just the storiesthat we tell ourselves. Then
(11:10):
there's the stories that werelate to our children. Then
there's the stories we give asteachers, the stories we give,
you know, as an insurance agent,as a business person at their
story after story after story.We're built on stories. We are
more story than just aboutanything else when you think
about it.
Gary Michels (11:31):
How do you inspire someone to change their story?
Bridget Cook-Burch (11:34):
One of the things I found most effective is
to work with people on whattheir core values are, or one of
my authors that she's writing abook, it has to do with what she
calls it's in your bones, innatedrivers. But we all have these
intrinsic values, and they arestory driven. But when we get in
(11:55):
touch with those, and werecognize like to my core, oh,
my goodness, I am these amazingthings, and this is what I stand
for, and this is what I believein, then suddenly that that
tends to have an energeticeffect on now, how am I going to
show up today?
Gary Michels (12:13):
It's so true. That is so huge. The deeper question
than that, how do you get aperson, Bridget, to even know
what their "why" is, if theydon't know?
Bridget Cook-Burch (12:24):
Right? Well, I have seen the power of knowing
the why. In Japanese, they callit ikigai, your reason for
breathing like you find theseways to get down to that
inherent self of I have apurpose on the planet, you know,
and in in ikigai, it's doingsomething that you're good at,
(12:44):
that you love, so that passioncomes through, but also
something that will serve theworld. I don't know if you've
ever like seen the fishmongersin in Seattle, at Pike's place?
Gary Michels (12:56):
I have. They're so excited and throwing the fish
around and the whole thing.
Bridget Cook-Burch (13:02):
They have the stinky, smelliest job on the
planet. They have to get up atlike, 3:30 or four in the
morning, and they're freezingcold and full of slime. They
have the best time. And this iswhat is possible. No matter what
your job is, I don't care ifyou're an accountant or a data
programmer or or whatever itmight be like, we have the
(13:22):
ability to to find our why andthen bring that why out into the
world. But I will tell you this,when a corporate culture
actually loves the why andincorporates like, here's the
why of our business, here's thewhy of our team. Now let's get
down to the whys of ourindividuals that make up this
(13:43):
team, and let's see how we cando extraordinary things
together. That's when the magichappens. That becomes amazing,
because then there's threedifferent stories that can
coalesce beautifully together,and individuality and purpose
all come together. It's amazing.
Gary Michels (14:01):
It's interesting how the all of this kind of
comes into the story, andcreating the story, and being
able to share stories fromdifferent perspectives, where a
person would think a serialkiller's daughter's story would
not be good. But really, inreality, it brings out so many
good things to take a look atcrime in a different way, right?
Because people get so narrowminded in certain things in
life, and if they just store itsounds to me and I and what I
(14:24):
believe this is what you'resaying, that story gives people
a blank canvas to look at it ina different way. Right? Is that
it?
Bridget Cook-Burch (14:32):
Oh, absolutely. You know that old
saying that, that we learned askids, never judge a person until
you've walked a mile in theirshoes. Tell you something.
Anytime I have held a judgment,God will bring me a person in a
story, and all of a sudden I getblown away, and that judgment is
blown out of the water, but it'slike you have an opportunity in
(14:54):
a book to walk more than a milein a man or a woman's shoes or a
child's shoes. You get to seelike the inner processing and
and the reactions to things thathave happened in the world, and
then what this person decides tomake of it. And so I write more
extreme stories, but they havean indelible impression, because
(15:15):
somewhere along that wavelength,someone can find themselves
like, probably not to the fullextreme, but they can find a
piece of their own story in therises and falls of this
character, and then how theyovercame such tragedy, their own
dark night of the soul andreally rose. And they're like,
Wow, if this person can do ifthe daughter of a serial killer
(15:38):
can get up in the morning andcreate a life of joy for her
family and for the world likemaybe I can get out of bed
today. I can find a place whereI can be a contribution. Maybe I
can face this Goliath ofpaperwork that is that I'm
facing today, where I can, I canface this, this health challenge
that I'm that I'm facing, and sowe do. We find power in these
(16:01):
stories? I first saw it in a lotof entrepreneurs, but I have
also seen this through theyears. I've done some work with
AT and T lucid technologies,many other businesses through
the years, and I saw when theycould be uber effective at
telling stories, and I saw whenthey failed. And you know, even
Warren Buffett says, like, ifyou want to be worth 60% more in
(16:24):
your lifetime, understand how toexpress yourself on paper and in
person. And so I'll give you anexample. I was on a leadership
retreat that I was hosting inItaly for women, and there was a
woman that was just thisextraordinary, kind, incredible,
loving woman, and she had ahealth business, and it was
failing, and so we talked abouther story, and inside of it, she
(16:49):
had some grief, because she'dlost her husband to some medical
issues, and she'd been a westernmedicine physical therapist, and
had done all kinds of things inthat but she lost her father,
her mother and her husband inquick succession, and she saw
some problems, like hugeproblems in western medicine
(17:10):
that impacted the life that theyhad and how quickly they went to
their death. So she went intomore Eastern medicine and found
these really effective thingsthat she's so passionate about
telling people, but she didn'tsay her why. She didn't tell her
why. So she's trying to shovethis eastern idealism and some
(17:33):
some solutions onto people, andthey were just pushing back. So
we started to work with herstory, and what she what she
learned to do, was to watch, andif someone was, you know,
struggling with health, or theywere having these things that
she would say, I want to I wantto share with you my experience.
And then she would share a bitof her story and why she was
doing what she did, and now whatshe knew could help them, and
(17:57):
the no strings attached, she'slike, I just love people so
much. I want them to be well,and you're someone I would love
to be well. And suddenly she washaving clients coming out of the
woodwork. So it's, it's, that'sa simple one, but the same thing
happens in corporate all thetime. So making sure that the
(18:17):
culture is in alignment with thestory, and that the that the
team actually has buy in to thewhy? Why are we here to serve
people? What is it that we cando that actually improves the
lives of of our customers, ofour clientele? And when people
become on fire about that, wholecultures change, and the numbers
(18:38):
change as well.
Gary Michels (18:39):
Absolutely, I want to shift gears for a moment and
talk about the importance ofpersistence. You ooze, like, I'm
not giving up, but talk to meabout how it's affected your
life. You call it your inspiredstory. Talk a little bit about
persistence in your life and howimportant it is. I mean, you ran
a trucking company, you ran aphone book, PR agency, I bet
(19:04):
you, without even asking,persistency was there in all
three of those cases.
Bridget Cook-Burch (19:09):
Absolutely, absolutely. In fact, I came to
learn a lot by failure too, howpersistence was absolutely key
to be able to succeed. And youknow, there are different stages
that you go through as you'rebuilding business. And usually
there's a little bit of selfsacrificial, you know, parts in
(19:29):
the beginning of almost anybusiness, until it can stand for
itself. And so I definitely wentthrough those stages as well.
But there's also, you know, whenyou have a dream that's so rich
and fulfilling, then there isthat. There's a passion to your
persistence, there's there's abeauty to it. But anyone who
(19:52):
gets up in the morning and goesto bed every night understands
that there's going to be risesand falls, there's going to be
things. That come at you andunderstanding that we're messy
humans, and we all have thesecome froms that we're learning
and growing from. Instead ofbeing in so much judgment like I
(20:14):
used to be of myself, I havelearned to be a lot more self
compassionate and to understandthe lessons, and I will tell you
what I have like a I have a verycreative mind. I have some ADHD
qualities, you know, ohsquirrel, oh squirrel, me too.
But what I found through bookswas that I had to temper some of
(20:38):
that and and still have vivacityand joy and passion, but also
make sure that when I wouldcommit to something that I was
in it for the long term. So, youknow, books take a while. They
generally take about a year,sometimes up to a few years, to
complete, depending on thequality and what you're writing
about. And so a little at atime, I learned just how
(21:01):
beautiful a long term projectcould be if I chose to be
persistent. Because when I wasyounger, it was I struggled to
finish anything, even my meal,you know, I'd be off and running
into something else.Persistence, I have found, as
I'm working with business ownersand and others, it is the key to
success. The one thing that Ithink is important is sometimes
(21:25):
people are dogmatic in theirpersistence, and they don't fail
fast enough. We have to allowourselves to fail fast enough
too, so we're not hanging on tosomething that's not working,
but allow it to progress towhere it needs to go, so that
it, it can get out of the way.
Gary Michels (21:41):
That's so huge. That is so huge. So what would
you say is your professionallegacy?
Bridget Cook-Burch (21:47):
That's a beautiful question. And I think
what I would share is, is whenpeople do the deep dives into
their own stories, their ownpast, two things happen. Number
one, they heal profoundly. Andnumber two, they like themselves
better, and they're more able tobecome leaders in the world. And
so I think my professionallegacy is for people to learn
(22:11):
that there is power and magic inyour story. There is power and
magic in your past and in yourwords and in your patterns and
the ability to express thosethat serve you, serve your
family, serve your community,serve your work. And I love, how
shall I say this enabling andennobling leaders? Because I
(22:31):
love it when they find their ownanswers from the inside out. You
know, it's not my job to tellthem who they are as a leader,
but oh, do I love to spark thatprocess.
Gary Michels (22:41):
That's awesome. What would you say is your
personal legacy?
Bridget Cook-Burch (22:47):
I think now I'm gonna get a little emotional
to be what I experienced in thathospital room, to look into
someone's eyes and beunconditionally loving like just
to set aside all judgment and towant to hear the story. I think
that's my personal legacy.
Gary Michels (23:04):
Do you feel you've arrived there?
Bridget Cook-Burch (23:06):
I feel like I work on it every day. So I
feel like the longer I live, themore legacy I have to give. And
I'm definitely not done yet.
Gary Michels (23:16):
Now, you mentioned a little bit ago about heroes
and then sheroes, and there wereprobably some people going,
what's a shero? So you're the cofounder and former executive
director of Sheroes United, anonprofit organization that
helps women and girls arise fromtrauma. Can you tell us a bit
about sheroes?
Bridget Cook-Burch (23:36):
Yeah, we're a nonprofit that has been in
service to humankind for thelast 10 years. Right now, we're
working on our one, three andfive year plan with 100 year
impact, because the work we do,it actually affects generations.
It has to do with education,story, advocacy, we've generally
(23:59):
helped we're like in prisonpopulations right now, helping
them to tell a new story. Wework with victims of human
trafficking, victims of domesticviolence and sexual assault, and
what we provide are the guidanceand tools for them to be able to
prevent further abuse forthemselves and anyone in their
(24:20):
generations following, and thenalso to not only rise beyond
abuse, but to thrive beyondabuse, and to be able to use
that to become an exceptionalleader in their family and their
community.
Gary Michels (24:36):
Beautiful. So how would people if they wanted to
hear about your books, get yourbook. Get involved in your
organizations. Have you speakfor their company, or coach
them, or whatever it is you do.How would someone get in touch
with you?
Bridget Cook-Burch (24:51):
So you can find me at
yourinspiredstory.com, that'sone of the easiest ways to reach
out to me. I'm also onInstagram. The Book Whisperer,
Bridget Cook-Burch, and InspiredWriters Retreats, which I do a
couple times a year, I get a lotof people from many different
walks of life around the world,and a lot of people love to come
(25:12):
to those to explore their ownstory. So any of those places
would be wonderful. And then ournonprofit is sheroesunited.org.
Gary Michels (25:22):
Well, I really appreciate, Bridget, you coming
on the show today, I know you'regoing to hear from a lot of
people because of your kindwords and just who you are as a
person. What a blessing.
Bridget Cook-Burch (25:32):
Thank you.
Welcome to Let's Talk Legacy. I'm really excited
(00:03):
about our next guest, BridgetCook-Burch. Bridget is a New
York Times and Wall StreetJournal, best selling author
writing mentor and speaker, aswell as the CEO and founder of
YourInspiredStory.com andInspired Legacy Publishing,
whose greatest passion ishelping others to discover the
importance of their own storyand to become leaders in their
(00:26):
own communities worldwide. Sowelcome to our show.
Bridget Cook-Burch (00:29):
I'm so delighted to be here. I love
your premise. I love what youstand for, and I'm excited for
our talk today.
Gary Michels (00:35):
Let's jump right in with a moment that really
changed your life, which Iunderstand was a near death
experience for you?
Bridget Cook-Burch (00:43):
Yes, well, for a long time I didn't talk
about it because it was such asacred and bewildering
experience to me. But now Ishare it quite frequently
because it happens to morepeople than you think. But for
me, it was so extraordinarybecause, you know, I was in the
hospital, I'm listening tonurses outside in the corridor,
and they're saying she's notgoing to make it until morning.
(01:06):
And so I just had the mostextraordinary sadness, because I
knew I had not fulfilled themeasure of my creation. I just
knew I didn't know what I washere for. I was working three
jobs, going to school, likeworking myself to the bone,
which is why I was in thehospital, and here I am unable
to get better. And what wedidn't know was one of the
(01:26):
medications they were giving mewas killing me. So I came in
sick and got sicker, and then Ihad this extraordinary presence
that filled my room with so muchunconditional love Gary that it
changed my whole world. And Iwas I was told I was being given
a second chance at life. And Iwoke up and they had been giving
(01:49):
me intravenous antibiotics inwhat's called a subclavian and
the heart, because I was soemaciated, I couldn't have a
regular IV. And I picked out tothe nurse, I said, I can have
all of these, but I can't havethis one. And she looked at me
like I was crazy. She was like,this is the only thing saving
your life. We thought you weregoing to die. And I said, No,
(02:10):
seriously, this one's killingme. The rest of these I can
have. Well, she looked at melike I was a French fresh eye of
a happy meal, that's for sure,right? She refused to take me
off of it, but I was so adamantthat she went to speak to the
doctor. And fortunately, he'dhad other patients who'd had
these type of experiences. Andso he said, Well, I think we
(02:32):
better listen to this. We cantake her off. She's on the rest
of these, and we'll see how shedoes. And 24 hours later, I
walked out of the hospital andon my own power. So it was a
profound experience.
Gary Michels (02:44):
Wow, wow. And so through that experience, you
learn the power of a story, thatif you can change your story,
you can change your life. Sowhat sort of things did you
start telling yourself to regaincontrol of your own narrative?
Bridget Cook-Burch (03:01):
What was fascinating when I got out of
the hospital, you know, I had alot of fixed beliefs about
myself, so I'd been adopted. Ihad three sets of parents. By
the time I was six months old, Iwas always waiting for the big
people to go away, you know,like I could only trust so much,
and I was fairly independent,because I I just, I didn't feel
supported until the hospital,and suddenly it was like, Oh, I
(03:24):
can't tell that same story. It'snot true. And all of a sudden, I
was able to look into the eyes,well, my own eyes, for the first
time, and see love there. Thatwas extraordinary. But then as I
went out into the world, Iwasn't afraid of people anymore.
I could look into the eyes ofanyone like I can see real
(03:44):
people, and I can see potential,and I see who they are without
their story, and I also see theimportance of their story to
them. And so just working withthem to disentangle sometimes
fixed beliefs from from thosethat are, that are the truth for
them is really beenextraordinary.
Gary Michels (04:05):
As you've been successful as a storyteller and
writer, you've had severalnational best sellers, including
Divine Turbulence, The WitnessWore Red, Shattered Silence, and
there's been others. How did yougo through this whole process of
putting this on paper andputting into a story?
Bridget Cook-Burch (04:22):
Well, it's a little miraculous, that's for
sure. In my estimation, thefirst book that I went to write,
I was so taken with the lessonsof gang kids. You know, they
came from different worlds thanI did, and I was so fascinated
by who they were and what theyhad experienced already, so
young, and then where they wereheaded, and I thought, wouldn't
(04:44):
it be great to write a story ofredemption? Right? So a kid
really gets in a lot of trouble,the blood in, blood out,
mentality, like you have tospill blood to get in and and
you can't get out. And that'swhat was happening in Denver at
the time, as I was working withthese kids. And. What if you
could be forgiven in yourcommunity, forgive yourself and
(05:06):
feel like you could be forgivenby God, like, what? What could
happen then? And so I wasplaying with this idea. Was
writing some things, but onenight, in the middle of the
night, I had a dream, and I hadcharacter scenes, plots. I say I
even had eye color, because it'strue, I wrote. I wrote for
hours, like from two o'clock inthe morning until about 10. I
wrote this whole novel out,thinking it was fiction, and
(05:30):
then I had to do some research,because a lot of the kids that I
worked with in Denver wereNuestra Familia and the Bloods
and the Crips and, you know,some of the local gangs. But in
my dream, it was a skinhead. Andso I was like, well, that's
fascinating, you know? So I, Ihad to do some research, and I
come across this guy's website,a former skinhead. Everything
(05:51):
Gary that he had written abouthis life, everything that I had
written about in my fictionalnovel, were in Dan. It was
crazy. Wow. There were so manythings that were the same that
I'm like, this is the guy. Andthen he said, I'm looking for
someone to write my life story.If you know of anyone, have them
call me. And I thought he's gotto think I'm crazy. Who is this
(06:13):
crazy? Whack, a woman. But I didcall him, and his story was
different than my novel, but thebig, main turning points were
all the same. And so that's why,to me, it felt really
miraculous. A young woman readhis story, and she said, I think
if there's a writer who couldtake a story of so much darkness
(06:34):
but create hope and healing, itwould be you. And then she said,
I'm the daughter of the happyface serial killer. Would you
write my life story and Gary, Igotta tell you, I I was so
floored, I did not know what todo in that moment. I kind of
like, How in the world could youever write an inspiring, love
filled story about the daughterof a serial killer? But we did.
(06:57):
Her dad was always weird, but hewas also the Savior. So there
was this like pendulum swing ofbehavior with him. So part of
him was the Savior that wouldcome into town and fill her poor
mother's cupboards with food andbuy her blue jeans, right, and
the things that a teenager needsand sustenance. And so he was
(07:18):
the Savior in some regards, andthen in other things, you know,
we always had these detectivenovels, and you know, duct tape
in his in his truck. But everytrucker has duct tape. You know,
there were things that she neverput together in her mind.
Because, why and how would youever do that? You wouldn't write
about your own, your own parent.But when she found out, it was
(07:40):
very life shattering. It wasdifficult too, because when we
came out with the book, therewere people that were saying,
you know, you're benefiting fromyour father's killing, and
usually those were the victimsfamilies, but when they read her
story, there was so much healingthat took place. Because, you
know, no one had ever written abook like this before.
Gary Michels (08:00):
And she's successful now, you said she's a
successful producer, right?
Bridget Cook-Burch (08:03):
She is incredibly successful. She's
created a lot of shows on A & Eand other beautiful cable
networks, and she's known forbringing compassion to to true
crime. So she did one calledmonster in my family, and she
brought together victimsfamilies as well as the serial
killers families, so like theBoston bomber and others that
(08:25):
they were able to come togetherand understand each other and
heal.
Gary Michels (08:29):
Gosh, that's crazy. That's crazy good.
Bridget Cook-Burch (08:31):
Crazy amazing.
Gary Michels (08:33):
So your storytelling is such an
important part of leaving alegacy, that's so much in our
company is called SouthwesternLegacy Insurance Group, and it's
all about, what are you doing toleave behind for others and your
actions today? And it's not justmoney and leaving money behind.
It's your, it's everything thatyou're leaving behind.
Bridget Cook-Burch (08:54):
Gary, I've got to tell you, I've had three
businesses in my lifetime thathave legacy in them. My
publishing company is InspiredLegacy Publishing and Inspired
Legacy LLC is my overarchingbusiness. I think we have a lot
in common.
Gary Michels (09:10):
I love it. Love it. So why is story more
important than money or amonument or an award?
Bridget Cook-Burch (09:18):
You know, we have been telling stories since
the dawn of time. You know, wefirst began with with sticks and
and petroglyphs, right and anddrum beats and other things, but
around campfires, we have beenusing the power of story and
then words and language as itcame about, ever since the dawn
(09:41):
of time, and it's how we learnroles. It's how we learn to
relate to one another. It's it'show we learn the heroes and she
rose journey, you know, which isvery cyclical, and some of us
will be on three or four ofthose in our lifetime,
especially if we're adventurous.But I will tell you that. Uh,
the power of story, especiallythe stories that we love and
(10:04):
believe in, really dictate whatwe manifest and choose to create
in the world. Because if webelieve to our core that we're
not enough, that the world is anunsafe place, that life sucks,
that there's never enough money,that there's, you know, we we
believe those things, we moveforward in life as if that is
(10:26):
true for us, and we will findthat truth wherever we go if we
choose to believe that the worldis great and that there's messy
people, but the world isinherently great and there's
goodness in everyone, and thatthere is something for us to
learn every single day, and thatthere is a beautiful legacy that
we can leave the world. Then webegin to act accordingly. We
(10:50):
begin to manage our behaviors ina different way. We do all kinds
of things we wouldn't do if webelieved the world was rotten,
and by believing that the worldis good, we create incredible
miracles each individual. AndI've seen it over and over and
so those are just the storiesthat we tell ourselves. Then
(11:10):
there's the stories that werelate to our children. Then
there's the stories we give asteachers, the stories we give,
you know, as an insurance agent,as a business person at their
story after story after story.We're built on stories. We are
more story than just aboutanything else when you think
about it.
Gary Michels (11:31):
How do you inspire someone to change their story?
Bridget Cook-Burch (11:34):
One of the things I found most effective is
to work with people on whattheir core values are, or one of
my authors that she's writing abook, it has to do with what she
calls it's in your bones, innatedrivers. But we all have these
intrinsic values, and they arestory driven. But when we get in
(11:55):
touch with those, and werecognize like to my core, oh,
my goodness, I am these amazingthings, and this is what I stand
for, and this is what I believein, then suddenly that that
tends to have an energeticeffect on now, how am I going to
show up today?
Gary Michels (12:13):
It's so true. That is so huge. The deeper question
than that, how do you get aperson, Bridget, to even know
what their "why" is, if theydon't know?
Bridget Cook-Burch (12:24):
Right? Well, I have seen the power of knowing
the why. In Japanese, they callit ikigai, your reason for
breathing like you find theseways to get down to that
inherent self of I have apurpose on the planet, you know,
and in in ikigai, it's doingsomething that you're good at,
(12:44):
that you love, so that passioncomes through, but also
something that will serve theworld. I don't know if you've
ever like seen the fishmongersin in Seattle, at Pike's place?
Gary Michels (12:56):
I have. They're so excited and throwing the fish
around and the whole thing.
Bridget Cook-Burch (13:02):
They have the stinky, smelliest job on the
planet. They have to get up atlike, 3:30 or four in the
morning, and they're freezingcold and full of slime. They
have the best time. And this iswhat is possible. No matter what
your job is, I don't care ifyou're an accountant or a data
programmer or or whatever itmight be like, we have the
(13:22):
ability to to find our why andthen bring that why out into the
world. But I will tell you this,when a corporate culture
actually loves the why andincorporates like, here's the
why of our business, here's thewhy of our team. Now let's get
down to the whys of ourindividuals that make up this
(13:43):
team, and let's see how we cando extraordinary things
together. That's when the magichappens. That becomes amazing,
because then there's threedifferent stories that can
coalesce beautifully together,and individuality and purpose
all come together. It's amazing.
Gary Michels (14:01):
It's interesting how the all of this kind of
comes into the story, andcreating the story, and being
able to share stories fromdifferent perspectives, where a
person would think a serialkiller's daughter's story would
not be good. But really, inreality, it brings out so many
good things to take a look atcrime in a different way, right?
Because people get so narrowminded in certain things in
life, and if they just store itsounds to me and I and what I
(14:24):
believe this is what you'resaying, that story gives people
a blank canvas to look at it ina different way. Right? Is that
it?
Bridget Cook-Burch (14:32):
Oh, absolutely. You know that old
saying that, that we learned askids, never judge a person until
you've walked a mile in theirshoes. Tell you something.
Anytime I have held a judgment,God will bring me a person in a
story, and all of a sudden I getblown away, and that judgment is
blown out of the water, but it'slike you have an opportunity in
(14:54):
a book to walk more than a milein a man or a woman's shoes or a
child's shoes. You get to seelike the inner processing and
and the reactions to things thathave happened in the world, and
then what this person decides tomake of it. And so I write more
extreme stories, but they havean indelible impression, because
(15:15):
somewhere along that wavelength,someone can find themselves
like, probably not to the fullextreme, but they can find a
piece of their own story in therises and falls of this
character, and then how theyovercame such tragedy, their own
dark night of the soul andreally rose. And they're like,
Wow, if this person can do ifthe daughter of a serial killer
(15:38):
can get up in the morning andcreate a life of joy for her
family and for the world likemaybe I can get out of bed
today. I can find a place whereI can be a contribution. Maybe I
can face this Goliath ofpaperwork that is that I'm
facing today, where I can, I canface this, this health challenge
that I'm that I'm facing, and sowe do. We find power in these
(16:01):
stories? I first saw it in a lotof entrepreneurs, but I have
also seen this through theyears. I've done some work with
AT and T lucid technologies,many other businesses through
the years, and I saw when theycould be uber effective at
telling stories, and I saw whenthey failed. And you know, even
Warren Buffett says, like, ifyou want to be worth 60% more in
(16:24):
your lifetime, understand how toexpress yourself on paper and in
person. And so I'll give you anexample. I was on a leadership
retreat that I was hosting inItaly for women, and there was a
woman that was just thisextraordinary, kind, incredible,
loving woman, and she had ahealth business, and it was
failing, and so we talked abouther story, and inside of it, she
(16:49):
had some grief, because she'dlost her husband to some medical
issues, and she'd been a westernmedicine physical therapist, and
had done all kinds of things inthat but she lost her father,
her mother and her husband inquick succession, and she saw
some problems, like hugeproblems in western medicine
(17:10):
that impacted the life that theyhad and how quickly they went to
their death. So she went intomore Eastern medicine and found
these really effective thingsthat she's so passionate about
telling people, but she didn'tsay her why. She didn't tell her
why. So she's trying to shovethis eastern idealism and some
(17:33):
some solutions onto people, andthey were just pushing back. So
we started to work with herstory, and what she what she
learned to do, was to watch, andif someone was, you know,
struggling with health, or theywere having these things that
she would say, I want to I wantto share with you my experience.
And then she would share a bitof her story and why she was
doing what she did, and now whatshe knew could help them, and
(17:57):
the no strings attached, she'slike, I just love people so
much. I want them to be well,and you're someone I would love
to be well. And suddenly she washaving clients coming out of the
woodwork. So it's, it's, that'sa simple one, but the same thing
happens in corporate all thetime. So making sure that the
(18:17):
culture is in alignment with thestory, and that the that the
team actually has buy in to thewhy? Why are we here to serve
people? What is it that we cando that actually improves the
lives of of our customers, ofour clientele? And when people
become on fire about that, wholecultures change, and the numbers
(18:38):
change as well.
Gary Michels (18:39):
Absolutely, I want to shift gears for a moment and
talk about the importance ofpersistence. You ooze, like, I'm
not giving up, but talk to meabout how it's affected your
life. You call it your inspiredstory. Talk a little bit about
persistence in your life and howimportant it is. I mean, you ran
a trucking company, you ran aphone book, PR agency, I bet
(19:04):
you, without even asking,persistency was there in all
three of those cases.
Bridget Cook-Burch (19:09):
Absolutely, absolutely. In fact, I came to
learn a lot by failure too, howpersistence was absolutely key
to be able to succeed. And youknow, there are different stages
that you go through as you'rebuilding business. And usually
there's a little bit of selfsacrificial, you know, parts in
(19:29):
the beginning of almost anybusiness, until it can stand for
itself. And so I definitely wentthrough those stages as well.
But there's also, you know, whenyou have a dream that's so rich
and fulfilling, then there isthat. There's a passion to your
persistence, there's there's abeauty to it. But anyone who
(19:52):
gets up in the morning and goesto bed every night understands
that there's going to be risesand falls, there's going to be
things. That come at you andunderstanding that we're messy
humans, and we all have thesecome froms that we're learning
and growing from. Instead ofbeing in so much judgment like I
(20:14):
used to be of myself, I havelearned to be a lot more self
compassionate and to understandthe lessons, and I will tell you
what I have like a I have a verycreative mind. I have some ADHD
qualities, you know, ohsquirrel, oh squirrel, me too.
But what I found through bookswas that I had to temper some of
(20:38):
that and and still have vivacityand joy and passion, but also
make sure that when I wouldcommit to something that I was
in it for the long term. So, youknow, books take a while. They
generally take about a year,sometimes up to a few years, to
complete, depending on thequality and what you're writing
about. And so a little at atime, I learned just how
(21:01):
beautiful a long term projectcould be if I chose to be
persistent. Because when I wasyounger, it was I struggled to
finish anything, even my meal,you know, I'd be off and running
into something else.Persistence, I have found, as
I'm working with business ownersand and others, it is the key to
success. The one thing that Ithink is important is sometimes
(21:25):
people are dogmatic in theirpersistence, and they don't fail
fast enough. We have to allowourselves to fail fast enough
too, so we're not hanging on tosomething that's not working,
but allow it to progress towhere it needs to go, so that
it, it can get out of the way.
Gary Michels (21:41):
That's so huge. That is so huge. So what would
you say is your professionallegacy?
Bridget Cook-Burch (21:47):
That's a beautiful question. And I think
what I would share is, is whenpeople do the deep dives into
their own stories, their ownpast, two things happen. Number
one, they heal profoundly. Andnumber two, they like themselves
better, and they're more able tobecome leaders in the world. And
so I think my professionallegacy is for people to learn
(22:11):
that there is power and magic inyour story. There is power and
magic in your past and in yourwords and in your patterns and
the ability to express thosethat serve you, serve your
family, serve your community,serve your work. And I love, how
shall I say this enabling andennobling leaders? Because I
(22:31):
love it when they find their ownanswers from the inside out. You
know, it's not my job to tellthem who they are as a leader,
but oh, do I love to spark thatprocess.
Gary Michels (22:41):
That's awesome. What would you say is your
personal legacy?
Bridget Cook-Burch (22:47):
I think now I'm gonna get a little emotional
to be what I experienced in thathospital room, to look into
someone's eyes and beunconditionally loving like just
to set aside all judgment and towant to hear the story. I think
that's my personal legacy.
Gary Michels (23:04):
Do you feel you've arrived there?
Bridget Cook-Burch (23:06):
I feel like I work on it every day. So I
feel like the longer I live, themore legacy I have to give. And
I'm definitely not done yet.
Gary Michels (23:16):
Now, you mentioned a little bit ago about heroes
and then sheroes, and there wereprobably some people going,
what's a shero? So you're the cofounder and former executive
director of Sheroes United, anonprofit organization that
helps women and girls arise fromtrauma. Can you tell us a bit
about sheroes?
Bridget Cook-Burch (23:36):
Yeah, we're a nonprofit that has been in
service to humankind for thelast 10 years. Right now, we're
working on our one, three andfive year plan with 100 year
impact, because the work we do,it actually affects generations.
It has to do with education,story, advocacy, we've generally
(23:59):
helped we're like in prisonpopulations right now, helping
them to tell a new story. Wework with victims of human
trafficking, victims of domesticviolence and sexual assault, and
what we provide are the guidanceand tools for them to be able to
prevent further abuse forthemselves and anyone in their
(24:20):
generations following, and thenalso to not only rise beyond
abuse, but to thrive beyondabuse, and to be able to use
that to become an exceptionalleader in their family and their
community.
Gary Michels (24:36):
Beautiful. So how would people if they wanted to
hear about your books, get yourbook. Get involved in your
organizations. Have you speakfor their company, or coach
them, or whatever it is you do.How would someone get in touch
with you?
Bridget Cook-Burch (24:51):
So you can find me at
yourinspiredstory.com, that'sone of the easiest ways to reach
out to me. I'm also onInstagram. The Book Whisperer,
Bridget Cook-Burch, and InspiredWriters Retreats, which I do a
couple times a year, I get a lotof people from many different
walks of life around the world,and a lot of people love to come
(25:12):
to those to explore their ownstory. So any of those places
would be wonderful. And then ournonprofit is sheroesunited.org.
Gary Michels (25:22):
Well, I really appreciate, Bridget, you coming
on the show today, I know you'regoing to hear from a lot of
people because of your kindwords and just who you are as a
person. What a blessing.
Bridget Cook-Burch (25:32):
Thank you.
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