March 9, 2025 • 38 mins
Have you ever noticed yourself turning to God only when life hits extremes? After postponing this recording for nearly two months, I finally sat down to share a raw, unfiltered look at my personal faith struggles – specifically what I've come to call the "80% problem."
I realized that the vast majority of my prayer life happens only during the highest highs (when I'm grateful) and lowest lows (when I'm desperate). But what about the 80% of life that happens in between? This pattern revealed my ongoing battle with patience and trust – wanting God to provide immediate answers rather than embracing the waiting periods that are crucial to spiritual growth.
The Bible offers numerous examples of faithful waiting – Abraham and Sarah anticipating their promised child for decades, the Israelites wandering for 40 years before reaching the Promised Land. These stories make my impatience with waiting days or weeks seem trivial by comparison. Scripture directly addresses this human tendency in passages like Isaiah 40:31 ("those who trust in the Lord will renew their strength") and Romans 8:25 ("if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait patiently").
Perhaps most comforting is the understanding that God welcomes our authentic emotions. As Carter's father wisely shared, "God's got big shoulders" – we can approach Him with frustration, anger, and questions without turning away from faith. Like Job, questioning circumstances doesn't mean abandoning trust that God sees the complete picture when we can barely glimpse a fraction.
Whether you're struggling with patience, inconsistent prayer habits, or feeling distant from God during life's "middle ground" moments, know that you're not alone. Connect with us on Instagram @LifeBesideChristPodcast or email lifebesidechristpod@gmail.com to share your own experiences or prayer requests.
We love hearing from our listeners whether it's criticism, advice, or just thoughts on the conversation we had. Find us or reach out to us here:
•Email: lifebesidechristpod@gmail.com
•Instagram: @lifebesidechristpodcast
•Intro/Outro Music: "Our Days" by David Hays
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Welcome back to the Life Beside Christ podcast.
Bit of a strange episode here.
I'll be honest.
I put this off for quite awhile close to two months really
and it's I don't feel greatabout it.
(00:36):
I'm not trying to make excuses,but I feel like one.
I appreciate anyone who'sreally, I guess, listened to us
and supported us.
So I feel like part of it isI'm letting all of you guys down
(00:56):
by putting this off.
Um, I've just not selfishly,I've not had a lot of motivation
to get this recorded.
I guess and again, being honest, this is the third time in the
last two months where I've satdown to try to record this
(01:17):
episode.
I just don't feel great aboutit.
I don't feel like I'm ready todo this by myself.
Um, but we'll see Quick update.
Um, carter's almost halfwaythrough his police academy.
(01:38):
Uh, things are going good forhim.
He's enjoying it, he's learninga lot.
We get to see him on theweekends and hear about all the
stuff going on down there andthings he's learning, which is
cool and fun.
Yeah, I think that's mainly thebig update, but I'm not exactly
(01:58):
sure.
We're not really we.
I'm not really going to followin the spot in Matthew that
we've been going in.
I've kind of just had otherthings that I guess I've wanted
to talk about or that I get.
Really it's more of things thatI've been struggling with.
(02:19):
I don't know this, this mayjust be a really scattered I've
been struggling with.
I don't know, this may just bea really scattered conversation
with myself and if you happen tolisten to it, I guess you can
kind of get an insight to mythoughts and my, I guess,
overthinking.
I hope maybe this can helpsomeone else.
(02:41):
I don't know how many answersI'll provide.
I guess it's more of justsharing, sharing struggles and
things that maybe I found somecomfort in with the struggles.
Had this, I had this, I guess,picture it popped into my head
(03:13):
and it was like aself-realization and I not a
good one, um, not a good one formyself where, if you can
picture, you know, like a wave,like a graph, wavy, wavy, line,
right, the highs and lows, thethings that we go through, the
highs and lows of our life, andI realized I would say 80% to
(03:40):
90% of my praying happens if, if, in this wavy graph, if you
took the top 10% of the, the topof the curve, and the bottom
10% of the low, the bottom ofthe curves, I I feel like I feel
(04:05):
like that's where I spend mostof my prayer in when I get to
those highs and lows.
But I'm neglecting myrelationship with God in the
other 80% of the ups and downsof my life.
(04:30):
And it is right now even.
It's a hard thing for me torealize, to think about for
myself, where things are goingreally well the highs, the top
(04:54):
10% of the highs that I feellike I go through and I feel
good about when I'm praying andI'm thanking God, I'm giving
thanks, and then I get down.
You know, everyone does it.
We go, I feel good about whenI'm praying, then I'm thanking
God, I'm giving thanks, and thenI get down.
Everyone does it.
We go through different seasons.
We go through the highs andlows.
It can be in short spurts, itcan be the big picture stuff,
but we have highs and lows and Iget down in the lows and the
(05:21):
bottom 10%, I'm asking, I'masking a lot, I'm not, I'm not
giving thanks for a lot thereand I'm asking for all these
things from God.
And then I feel, you know, theslow upward, and then I kind of
get out of that bottom 10%.
And then it's like, hey, thingsare going good.
(05:42):
And then I realized I'm notpraying as much as I was three
days ago or a week ago orhowever long it was, because I
was asking for these things allthe time.
Or then the highs I was sohappy about the things that were
(06:02):
going on, the things that Irealized that I was thankful for
in my life and it's not thatI'm not thankful for those
things in the other parts of mylife.
Um, on the ups and downs, I justI fail and I do a bad job of
(06:23):
having a real relationship withGod.
It feels like Maybe I'm beinghard on myself, maybe part of it
, maybe we all go through thatand this I just it's, it's.
It's not what I want, it's notthe relationship God wants with
(06:47):
us, it's not the relationship Iwant with God.
It's a very selfishrelationship on my part and it
beats me up.
It's something that I need toget better and I think I'm
getting better about it.
Um, and I and I realized thething that I struggle with the
(07:14):
most is patience, being beingpatient and to go with that, I
guess selfishly again, I guess Imake excuses for myself and in
(07:42):
my relationship with God and inmy relationship with God.
I, you know it's, I've said itbefore and I'm sure plenty of
people will say it all the timeyou know God, if you, you were
just sitting right across fromme, it'd be so much easier.
It'd be a lot easier to havethis conversation with you and
(08:07):
being able to hear God andunderstanding that his answer is
not always going to beimmediate, you're not always
going to get that answer rightafter asking in prayer and
talking to God and again, weknow prayer shouldn't just be
asking, I know that.
(08:28):
But even when I'm not askingfor things in prayer, it'd be
selfishly right, it'd be so mucheasier to hear, hear a, a
verbal response.
Right, it's just our human side.
(08:50):
Would, I guess, instantgratification?
We would, we would prefer that.
I would say, most of the time,especially maybe as a non, not a
very mature Christian, I guess,and not that I guess, I mean,
(09:13):
you know, in 10 years I hope tobe in a better spot and more
confident in my relationshipwith God, if that makes sense.
Confident in my relationshipwith God, if that makes sense.
But yeah, patience and trustingGod, those are not that I don't
, but they're things that Idon't allow myself to do.
(09:35):
I stop myself, I overthinkthings to an extent that makes
me, I get frustrated, I get um,I get caught up in things that
aren't really even in relationto the things that I'm beginning
(09:57):
with.
You know, I just I let myselfcreate these stories in my head,
whether it's day-to-day stuffor big life things, and I try to
come up with these answers inmy head on my own.
Again, it's not a comfortingthing to sit there and realize
(10:19):
that I do such a poor job doingthese things.
I don't like it, I'm not happyabout it.
I'm sure that there are otherpeople out there that find
themselves in similar spots.
(10:40):
And the thing we all go throughthings differently, we all deal
with things differently, youknow, and for me, like when I
start to struggle with stuff, Iguess I try to like cover it up,
(11:01):
I try to find things todistract me, I guess, especially
from overthinking stupid things, and I think there's people
that maybe do the opposite.
(11:25):
They pull themselves away, youknow, they just want to be alone
, to deal with it and figure itout themselves, or to work
through it on their own, and I'mdefinitely, I guess, guilty of
both things.
I don't know exactly where I'mgoing with that, but patience
(11:55):
and trusting God, and there'splenty of stories.
There's plenty of stories inthe Bible that we can look at
right Like one of the first thatcome to mind is is the promise
that Abraham and Sarah got, andthey waited a long time, you
know, to have a kid and theirkids and a long time to be
(12:25):
faithful that this promise wasgoing to be fulfilled, and I
don't know exactly everythingthat they thought and
experienced and went throughthrough that long period of time
.
(12:45):
You know it's.
It's funny to think about.
The things that I feel like I'mstruggling with or that I'm
impatient with are days, weeks,hours, and theirs was decades.
It seems silly for me tostruggle with these wants and
(13:07):
these desires and not beingpatient when we can look at
examples from the Bible ofpeople displaying patience at a
much in a much better way, and Iguess I wish I could
(13:28):
reciprocate that in areas in mylife, whether it's, you know.
It can be related to jobs, itcan be friendships,
relationships, anything,anything, just being able to
(13:56):
trust God that he's got a plan,even when we can't see how we're
going to get there.
You know that God's timing isperfect and the things that seem
(14:18):
impossible for us are more thanpossible with God.
And that's just it's.
That's a good reminder, goodstory to look at in Genesis,
there with Abraham and Sarah.
And then another obvious one isMoses and the Israelites.
(14:39):
Right, they were in thewilderness for 40 years and they
were waiting to find thepromised land.
And they were in the wildernessfor 40 years a long time for
the Israelites.
They didn't all have the sameamount of faith and we know that
(15:05):
from the story.
Yeah, I had a couple of verseshere written down Isaiah 40, 40,
31.
But those who trust in the Lordwill renew their strength.
And that's it's.
(15:38):
It's.
It seems easier said than done.
Right like it's.
It's not that I don't trust thelord, I don't trust god, I don't
love god and obviously he lovesus.
I guess it's.
It's more of just that humanside of us that these things
that I pray for and I ask foragain, just wanting kind of that
instant gratification, notbeing patient, is what it boils
(16:04):
down to.
We're overwhelmed by daily life, balancing work, relationships,
responsibilities, just ourpersonal struggles, and
sometimes it can drain us, itcan make us feel exhausted
(16:26):
trying to deal with these things.
I've got to worry about.
This, this, this and this andthis and this deal with these
things.
I gotta worry about this, this,this and this and this and this
, and we're holding on to thesethings.
That myself very much included,to these things that we need to
trust.
(16:48):
Trust God and give these thingsto him and let him deal with
them and trust him and we'llonly be stronger because of it.
And just remind ourselves thatGod is a good father, right.
A good father isn't right.
(17:12):
Good father isn't right.
The Jesus said it in in one ofthe shoot.
I I'm not going to be able topull this off top of my head,
but I think it goes along thelines of what father who, uh, is
asked for for bread, is goingto give a rock.
You know it seems so silly tothink about, but God, god hears
(17:34):
our prayers, he knows our wantsand our desires and it's up to
us to take these things to himand give them to him and not
just bring them up and say, allright, brought them up to you,
but I'm going to keep a hold ofthis, this part, with you.
(17:56):
I'm gonna walk along with youand make sure this thing goes
the way I want it.
Um, even though we want to,it's it's not always easy to let
(18:16):
go of it like that, but we needto.
We need to for sure.
Another one that I came acrossand actually I came across this
clip from it was Jalen Hurts.
In a pre like the media day forthe Super Bowl, he brought
someone, asked him a questionand he brought up this answer
and said you do not realize nowwhat I am doing, but later you
(18:37):
will understand.
And again, it's it's not easyto give up our worries and just
let things be.
It's hard right.
(18:58):
Stuff like this wouldn't bementioned in the Bible if God
didn't know that we were goingto have these struggles and
these questions.
But they are there.
They're there for us to to seekcomfort in Um where we're going
through situations where wecan't see the, the bigger
(19:21):
picture.
Um, again, it can be anythingfrom job to personal life, to
whatever else.
And sometimes we sit there andwe question, you know, like why?
Why is this happening?
Or why isn't this happening forme, god?
And one thing I think aboutquite a bit, and I heard it from
(19:46):
David Brayden, carter's dad,who's been on here a handful of
times, and he said that god'sgot big shoulders.
We're allowed to go to him.
We're allowed to turn to him,um, with any of our emotions,
and and that can sometimes bewith a little bit of anger
(20:11):
behind it, it can be with somesadness, it could, you know, it
can be with whatever Godunderstands.
Our emotions are what we wantand our desires and how we feel.
You know, you can even look atthe book of Job.
(20:38):
There's multiple times wherehe's on his knees, praying to
God and asking why, and the bigthing from that, though, is
understanding that just becausewe're asking why, it's not
meaning that we're turning ourback on God.
It's not.
(20:58):
We're not turning away from himon God.
It's not.
We're not turning away from him.
We're not cursing God becausethese things are happening.
We're experiencing these things, we're losing these things that
are happening in our life orthat we thought we had right in
front of us, like Job and beingand understanding, like
(21:19):
understanding that the thingsthat we see is sometimes so much
smaller than the picture Godsees for us, and, again, it's
(21:43):
one of those things that's hardfor us to kind of take a step
back from and try to even see alittle bit bigger of that
picture and understand that,even though we see 1% of this
quote-unquote picture, if we'reable to step back and even see a
little bit more to 2% or 5% orwhatever it is, god can see the
(22:05):
whole picture and he's got aplan.
He knows, he knows and we needto trust that and going through
daily struggles right there,there, they're only going to
(22:30):
help us.
You know, even now I can lookback to when I was a teenager,
the things that I thought werethe end of the world or the
things that I struggled with.
They have helped me learnthings through those experiences
and I everyone can say the samething.
I mean, I'm being pretty vagueabout it right now, but it's.
(22:54):
It's funny now that I'm talkingabout this, like like I know
what I'm saying.
I guess I really don't, butpatience is something I know.
I've struggled with for a whileand I can even picture.
(23:15):
I can remember nights where Iwould pray for God to give me
patience, you know.
And then you think about things.
Now that I've gone through that, I am going through that, I
will go through.
God's not just going to snaphis fingers and say, all right,
(23:41):
you're more patient because youasked for it, we're going to go
through things, we're going tostruggle through these things
and learn from them, and theseexperiences are how we're going
to get these gifts from God.
Um, and that we prayed for that, we, that we asked God to give
(24:07):
us right and he gave us theseopportunities to to learn from
and it's not not always easyright, and it's it's not always
fun, but that's it's not alwaysfun, but that's what we need,
(24:34):
even when it sucks.
Another one I had, or I saw, wasRomans 8, 25, and it says but
if we hope for what we do notyet have, we wait patiently.
(24:55):
Again, pretty, prettystraightforward there.
Right, if we have somethingthat we deeply desire, whether
it's getting through a personalgoal, things in our personal
(25:16):
life like becoming moreindependent, whether it's
fighting through a health issue,a change in daily circumstances
, sometimes the wait for thesethings can feel like forever,
like it's never going to happen.
(25:36):
We're never going to get there.
It's never going to happen,we're never going to get there.
And it's really easy to becomeimpatient and to be discouraged.
And, like I said, it's okay totake those frustrations to God,
(26:01):
but not turn from God because ofour impatience, our desires of
this instant gratification.
I want this now.
Yeah, I mean, it encourages usto be patient, to wait.
(26:24):
While we may not have what wehope for right now, we're called
to wait with patience.
It's very similar, you know, tothat verse from Isaiah but
those who trust in the Lord willrenew their strength.
Very similar, right, and Idon't know.
(26:51):
I don't know exactly.
Again, I don't know exactlywhere I'm going with this or if
anyone's going to get anythingfrom me sitting here rambling
for I don't know what are we ata half hour now, but hopefully I
(27:17):
guess someone else out therethat happens to listen to this
maybe finds himself in a similarspot.
They can, I guess, take comfortin knowing that they're not the
only one, that other peoplestruggle with this and God is
(27:39):
there for us, and as much assometimes we feel like it'd be
easier to sit across from atable from from God and have
these questions and and getanswers immediately, that it
(28:02):
wouldn't be a very fulfillingrelationship with God to just
have him on call and then say,all right, I'm done here, see
you later when I have moreproblems to bring up with you.
We know that we need to alwaysturn to God in prayer.
(28:24):
1 Thessalonians 5.17 praycontinually.
It's pretty straightforward.
As much as we go through theups and downs, maybe I'm the
only one that feels myself, orcatches myself, praying in the
(28:46):
highs and the lows more than theups and the downs on the way up
and on the way down of life.
Maybe I'm, I don't know, butit's a good reminder for myself
even and again, hopefully,someone else out there and can
(29:09):
relate um, and then you knowjust, I guess, in this part,
exodus 14.
The Lord will fight for you.
You need only to be stillPretty, pretty straightforward
(29:32):
there, right, it's prettystraightforward there.
God's on our side.
God loves us, god loves you.
Just keep going, keep going toGod in prayer, keep growing
(29:54):
closer to God.
And and the times where youfeel like you're in the lowest
parts of the lows, the next timeyou find yourself there you'll
know how to handle it.
You'll feel more confidentturning to God, even though you
(30:18):
may feel like you've donenothing but turn from him and
you've let yourself slip backinto old patterns of of sin,
your fleshly desires, whateverit might be.
But, like I said, hopefully thenext time you find yourself in
(30:43):
those lows, you find it easierto turn back to God, that God's
there waiting for us?
Something kind of off-topic, Iguess too.
I guess, to wrap up, I was thispast weekend.
(31:06):
I was at the Illinois statewrestling tournament.
We had some wrestlers qualify.
We were there and man I it'severy year and not just in
wrestling, I see it.
I'm obviously pretty busy andinvolved in sports and went
through the same same things inmy career, right, but wrestling
(31:34):
is such a like grueling sport.
It's such a long season forkids and especially if you cut
weight and like, if you do itlike me, not in a very good way,
so you do it like me, not in avery good way, so you make it
more miserable on yourself.
(31:56):
Um, you get to the statetournament and things don't go
your way.
I there were multiple timeswhere I saw kids that lost a
match or were eliminated.
Lost a match or were eliminatedand you can kind of tell what
other kids there don't haveteammates that also qualified
(32:17):
and that are there on their own,obviously with their coaches,
but on their own, or just kidsthat you know they qualify but
they don't feel like theydeserve to be there.
You know you can see stuff likethat and just by watching
people and seeing how they, Iguess, kind of carry themselves
around, and I always feel italways sucks to see people feel
(32:50):
like they don't deserve to bethere, like they don't belong
there, and that can be tied toso many different things.
I guess.
I guess the route I'm going isis we never know.
I guess I guess the route I'mgoing is is we never know the
(33:15):
struggles other people are goingthrough.
We never fully understand eventhe people that we're closest to
.
We never fully understand thestruggles that people go through
and the struggles that peoplego through.
And I guess it's just kind of areminder to, I guess, one check
in on the people that we careabout.
(33:35):
Make sure that they know thatwe're there for them, that
you're there for them, that youlove them, you care about them,
that you're there for them, thatyou love them, you care about
them and that, whatever they arestruggling with, if they don't
feel like opening up to you,that they know that God's always
(34:01):
there to talk to them and openup to them, to them and open up
to them.
Sometimes it's just being witha person.
If it's, you see someone youcare about just not that made,
(34:23):
just maybe seems off, that's notthemselves, and maybe they're
not someone that likes to openup a lot, but knowing that
sometimes just your presence,just being around them, whether
you're sitting in silence ortalking about things that are
silly, that are trivial, thatthat can help someone more than
(34:46):
you realize sometimes, who knowsthe goal going forward again, I
was just, I was so notmotivated to try to record this
and I still don't even know howgreat this will turn out Just
(35:11):
because I guess it's kind of aconfidence thing being able to
sit here by myself and putthoughts and pieces from the
Bible and the Word together.
That makes sense in a podcastepisode, really by myself.
It wasn't something I waslooking forward to.
Together that makes sense in apodcast episode, really by
myself.
It wasn't something I waslooking forward to.
(35:31):
But we, I want to have I'vesaid it the last two years and
it seems silly to keep saying,and maybe one day it'll happen,
but I want to be more consistentwith this, but I want to be
more consistent with this.
(35:52):
We want to be more consistentwith this um, looking at
probably having, uh, some moreguests over the next couple
months, especially while carteris still absent, and um, well,
yeah, I mean.
Well, I'll try to be moreactive, social, on social media,
keeping you guys updated.
(36:13):
So if you want to follow us oninstagram life beside christ
podcast on instagram, uh, emailus at life beside christ pod at
gmailcom.
Go ahead.
Us an email, shoot us a followor a message on Instagram.
Even if you want to write insome prayer requests, I'm more
(36:39):
than willing to do that on thepodcast or just add it to my own
personal prayers and I'm sureBrady and Carter would be more
than willing to do the same.
But, yeah, find us there, reachout to us.
(37:01):
And the other thing is I'd,since our last episode, we can
see, you know where people arelistening from, not obviously
not like who, but just wherepeople are listening from.
And it's it blows my mind.
Every time I see I open up youknow the app that kind of tracks
(37:22):
our, I guess, stats for thepodcast and we see a new
listener from Singapore orCalifornia, south Africa.
I mean it's crazy that peopleall over the country and all
over the world are Japan.
I mean it's crazy, it blows mymind that people from all over
(37:46):
the world in the country onetake the time to listen to us
and me ramble half the time.
But it's pretty cool, too thatto see that there are people all
over the world looking to learnmore about god, and in
different ways.
So I appreciate anyone wholistens to this and helps
(38:09):
support us.
Yeah, hopefully, hopefully thisisn't as bad as I think it is
in my head right now and youguys listening can gain
something from this ramblingthat I do.
(38:31):
Thank you for listening.
We will catch you on the nextone.
You.
Welcome back to the Life Beside Christ podcast.
Bit of a strange episode here.
I'll be honest.
I put this off for quite awhile close to two months really
and it's I don't feel greatabout it.
(00:36):
I'm not trying to make excuses,but I feel like one.
I appreciate anyone who'sreally, I guess, listened to us
and supported us.
So I feel like part of it isI'm letting all of you guys down
(00:56):
by putting this off.
Um, I've just not selfishly,I've not had a lot of motivation
to get this recorded.
I guess and again, being honest, this is the third time in the
last two months where I've satdown to try to record this
(01:17):
episode.
I just don't feel great aboutit.
I don't feel like I'm ready todo this by myself.
Um, but we'll see Quick update.
Um, carter's almost halfwaythrough his police academy.
(01:38):
Uh, things are going good forhim.
He's enjoying it, he's learninga lot.
We get to see him on theweekends and hear about all the
stuff going on down there andthings he's learning, which is
cool and fun.
Yeah, I think that's mainly thebig update, but I'm not exactly
(01:58):
sure.
We're not really we.
I'm not really going to followin the spot in Matthew that
we've been going in.
I've kind of just had otherthings that I guess I've wanted
to talk about or that I get.
Really it's more of things thatI've been struggling with.
(02:19):
I don't know this, this mayjust be a really scattered I've
been struggling with.
I don't know, this may just bea really scattered conversation
with myself and if you happen tolisten to it, I guess you can
kind of get an insight to mythoughts and my, I guess,
overthinking.
I hope maybe this can helpsomeone else.
(02:41):
I don't know how many answersI'll provide.
I guess it's more of justsharing, sharing struggles and
things that maybe I found somecomfort in with the struggles.
Had this, I had this, I guess,picture it popped into my head
(03:13):
and it was like aself-realization and I not a
good one, um, not a good one formyself where, if you can
picture, you know, like a wave,like a graph, wavy, wavy, line,
right, the highs and lows, thethings that we go through, the
highs and lows of our life, andI realized I would say 80% to
(03:40):
90% of my praying happens if, if, in this wavy graph, if you
took the top 10% of the, the topof the curve, and the bottom
10% of the low, the bottom ofthe curves, I I feel like I feel
(04:05):
like that's where I spend mostof my prayer in when I get to
those highs and lows.
But I'm neglecting myrelationship with God in the
other 80% of the ups and downsof my life.
(04:30):
And it is right now even.
It's a hard thing for me torealize, to think about for
myself, where things are goingreally well the highs, the top
(04:54):
10% of the highs that I feellike I go through and I feel
good about when I'm praying andI'm thanking God, I'm giving
thanks, and then I get down.
You know, everyone does it.
We go, I feel good about whenI'm praying, then I'm thanking
God, I'm giving thanks, and thenI get down.
Everyone does it.
We go through different seasons.
We go through the highs andlows.
It can be in short spurts, itcan be the big picture stuff,
but we have highs and lows and Iget down in the lows and the
(05:21):
bottom 10%, I'm asking, I'masking a lot, I'm not, I'm not
giving thanks for a lot thereand I'm asking for all these
things from God.
And then I feel, you know, theslow upward, and then I kind of
get out of that bottom 10%.
And then it's like, hey, thingsare going good.
(05:42):
And then I realized I'm notpraying as much as I was three
days ago or a week ago orhowever long it was, because I
was asking for these things allthe time.
Or then the highs I was sohappy about the things that were
(06:02):
going on, the things that Irealized that I was thankful for
in my life and it's not thatI'm not thankful for those
things in the other parts of mylife.
Um, on the ups and downs, I justI fail and I do a bad job of
(06:23):
having a real relationship withGod.
It feels like Maybe I'm beinghard on myself, maybe part of it
, maybe we all go through thatand this I just it's, it's.
It's not what I want, it's notthe relationship God wants with
(06:47):
us, it's not the relationship Iwant with God.
It's a very selfishrelationship on my part and it
beats me up.
It's something that I need toget better and I think I'm
getting better about it.
Um, and I and I realized thething that I struggle with the
(07:14):
most is patience, being beingpatient and to go with that, I
guess selfishly again, I guess Imake excuses for myself and in
(07:42):
my relationship with God and inmy relationship with God.
I, you know it's, I've said itbefore and I'm sure plenty of
people will say it all the timeyou know God, if you, you were
just sitting right across fromme, it'd be so much easier.
It'd be a lot easier to havethis conversation with you and
(08:07):
being able to hear God andunderstanding that his answer is
not always going to beimmediate, you're not always
going to get that answer rightafter asking in prayer and
talking to God and again, weknow prayer shouldn't just be
asking, I know that.
(08:28):
But even when I'm not askingfor things in prayer, it'd be
selfishly right, it'd be so mucheasier to hear, hear a, a
verbal response.
Right, it's just our human side.
(08:50):
Would, I guess, instantgratification?
We would, we would prefer that.
I would say, most of the time,especially maybe as a non, not a
very mature Christian, I guess,and not that I guess, I mean,
(09:13):
you know, in 10 years I hope tobe in a better spot and more
confident in my relationshipwith God, if that makes sense.
Confident in my relationshipwith God, if that makes sense.
But yeah, patience and trustingGod, those are not that I don't
, but they're things that Idon't allow myself to do.
(09:35):
I stop myself, I overthinkthings to an extent that makes
me, I get frustrated, I get um,I get caught up in things that
aren't really even in relationto the things that I'm beginning
(09:57):
with.
You know, I just I let myselfcreate these stories in my head,
whether it's day-to-day stuffor big life things, and I try to
come up with these answers inmy head on my own.
Again, it's not a comfortingthing to sit there and realize
(10:19):
that I do such a poor job doingthese things.
I don't like it, I'm not happyabout it.
I'm sure that there are otherpeople out there that find
themselves in similar spots.
(10:40):
And the thing we all go throughthings differently, we all deal
with things differently, youknow, and for me, like when I
start to struggle with stuff, Iguess I try to like cover it up,
(11:01):
I try to find things todistract me, I guess, especially
from overthinking stupid things, and I think there's people
that maybe do the opposite.
(11:25):
They pull themselves away, youknow, they just want to be alone
, to deal with it and figure itout themselves, or to work
through it on their own, and I'mdefinitely, I guess, guilty of
both things.
I don't know exactly where I'mgoing with that, but patience
(11:55):
and trusting God, and there'splenty of stories.
There's plenty of stories inthe Bible that we can look at
right Like one of the first thatcome to mind is is the promise
that Abraham and Sarah got, andthey waited a long time, you
know, to have a kid and theirkids and a long time to be
(12:25):
faithful that this promise wasgoing to be fulfilled, and I
don't know exactly everythingthat they thought and
experienced and went throughthrough that long period of time
.
(12:45):
You know it's.
It's funny to think about.
The things that I feel like I'mstruggling with or that I'm
impatient with are days, weeks,hours, and theirs was decades.
It seems silly for me tostruggle with these wants and
(13:07):
these desires and not beingpatient when we can look at
examples from the Bible ofpeople displaying patience at a
much in a much better way, and Iguess I wish I could
(13:28):
reciprocate that in areas in mylife, whether it's, you know.
It can be related to jobs, itcan be friendships,
relationships, anything,anything, just being able to
(13:56):
trust God that he's got a plan,even when we can't see how we're
going to get there.
You know that God's timing isperfect and the things that seem
(14:18):
impossible for us are more thanpossible with God.
And that's just it's.
That's a good reminder, goodstory to look at in Genesis,
there with Abraham and Sarah.
And then another obvious one isMoses and the Israelites.
(14:39):
Right, they were in thewilderness for 40 years and they
were waiting to find thepromised land.
And they were in the wildernessfor 40 years a long time for
the Israelites.
They didn't all have the sameamount of faith and we know that
(15:05):
from the story.
Yeah, I had a couple of verseshere written down Isaiah 40, 40,
31.
But those who trust in the Lordwill renew their strength.
And that's it's.
(15:38):
It's.
It seems easier said than done.
Right like it's.
It's not that I don't trust thelord, I don't trust god, I don't
love god and obviously he lovesus.
I guess it's.
It's more of just that humanside of us that these things
that I pray for and I ask foragain, just wanting kind of that
instant gratification, notbeing patient, is what it boils
(16:04):
down to.
We're overwhelmed by daily life, balancing work, relationships,
responsibilities, just ourpersonal struggles, and
sometimes it can drain us, itcan make us feel exhausted
(16:26):
trying to deal with these things.
I've got to worry about.
This, this, this and this andthis and this deal with these
things.
I gotta worry about this, this,this and this and this and this
, and we're holding on to thesethings.
That myself very much included,to these things that we need to
trust.
(16:48):
Trust God and give these thingsto him and let him deal with
them and trust him and we'llonly be stronger because of it.
And just remind ourselves thatGod is a good father, right.
A good father isn't right.
(17:12):
Good father isn't right.
The Jesus said it in in one ofthe shoot.
I I'm not going to be able topull this off top of my head,
but I think it goes along thelines of what father who, uh, is
asked for for bread, is goingto give a rock.
You know it seems so silly tothink about, but God, god hears
(17:34):
our prayers, he knows our wantsand our desires and it's up to
us to take these things to himand give them to him and not
just bring them up and say, allright, brought them up to you,
but I'm going to keep a hold ofthis, this part, with you.
(17:56):
I'm gonna walk along with youand make sure this thing goes
the way I want it.
Um, even though we want to,it's it's not always easy to let
(18:16):
go of it like that, but we needto.
We need to for sure.
Another one that I came acrossand actually I came across this
clip from it was Jalen Hurts.
In a pre like the media day forthe Super Bowl, he brought
someone, asked him a questionand he brought up this answer
and said you do not realize nowwhat I am doing, but later you
(18:37):
will understand.
And again, it's it's not easyto give up our worries and just
let things be.
It's hard right.
(18:58):
Stuff like this wouldn't bementioned in the Bible if God
didn't know that we were goingto have these struggles and
these questions.
But they are there.
They're there for us to to seekcomfort in Um where we're going
through situations where wecan't see the, the bigger
(19:21):
picture.
Um, again, it can be anythingfrom job to personal life, to
whatever else.
And sometimes we sit there andwe question, you know, like why?
Why is this happening?
Or why isn't this happening forme, god?
And one thing I think aboutquite a bit, and I heard it from
(19:46):
David Brayden, carter's dad,who's been on here a handful of
times, and he said that god'sgot big shoulders.
We're allowed to go to him.
We're allowed to turn to him,um, with any of our emotions,
and and that can sometimes bewith a little bit of anger
(20:11):
behind it, it can be with somesadness, it could, you know, it
can be with whatever Godunderstands.
Our emotions are what we wantand our desires and how we feel.
You know, you can even look atthe book of Job.
(20:38):
There's multiple times wherehe's on his knees, praying to
God and asking why, and the bigthing from that, though, is
understanding that just becausewe're asking why, it's not
meaning that we're turning ourback on God.
It's not.
(20:58):
We're not turning away from himon God.
It's not.
We're not turning away from him.
We're not cursing God becausethese things are happening.
We're experiencing these things, we're losing these things that
are happening in our life orthat we thought we had right in
front of us, like Job and beingand understanding, like
(21:19):
understanding that the thingsthat we see is sometimes so much
smaller than the picture Godsees for us, and, again, it's
(21:43):
one of those things that's hardfor us to kind of take a step
back from and try to even see alittle bit bigger of that
picture and understand that,even though we see 1% of this
quote-unquote picture, if we'reable to step back and even see a
little bit more to 2% or 5% orwhatever it is, god can see the
(22:05):
whole picture and he's got aplan.
He knows, he knows and we needto trust that and going through
daily struggles right there,there, they're only going to
(22:30):
help us.
You know, even now I can lookback to when I was a teenager,
the things that I thought werethe end of the world or the
things that I struggled with.
They have helped me learnthings through those experiences
and I everyone can say the samething.
I mean, I'm being pretty vagueabout it right now, but it's.
(22:54):
It's funny now that I'm talkingabout this, like like I know
what I'm saying.
I guess I really don't, butpatience is something I know.
I've struggled with for a whileand I can even picture.
(23:15):
I can remember nights where Iwould pray for God to give me
patience, you know.
And then you think about things.
Now that I've gone through that, I am going through that, I
will go through.
God's not just going to snaphis fingers and say, all right,
(23:41):
you're more patient because youasked for it, we're going to go
through things, we're going tostruggle through these things
and learn from them, and theseexperiences are how we're going
to get these gifts from God.
Um, and that we prayed for that, we, that we asked God to give
(24:07):
us right and he gave us theseopportunities to to learn from
and it's not not always easyright, and it's it's not always
fun, but that's it's not alwaysfun, but that's what we need,
(24:34):
even when it sucks.
Another one I had, or I saw, wasRomans 8, 25, and it says but
if we hope for what we do notyet have, we wait patiently.
(24:55):
Again, pretty, prettystraightforward there.
Right, if we have somethingthat we deeply desire, whether
it's getting through a personalgoal, things in our personal
(25:16):
life like becoming moreindependent, whether it's
fighting through a health issue,a change in daily circumstances
, sometimes the wait for thesethings can feel like forever,
like it's never going to happen.
(25:36):
We're never going to get there.
It's never going to happen,we're never going to get there.
And it's really easy to becomeimpatient and to be discouraged.
And, like I said, it's okay totake those frustrations to God,
(26:01):
but not turn from God because ofour impatience, our desires of
this instant gratification.
I want this now.
Yeah, I mean, it encourages usto be patient, to wait.
(26:24):
While we may not have what wehope for right now, we're called
to wait with patience.
It's very similar, you know, tothat verse from Isaiah but
those who trust in the Lord willrenew their strength.
Very similar, right, and Idon't know.
(26:51):
I don't know exactly.
Again, I don't know exactlywhere I'm going with this or if
anyone's going to get anythingfrom me sitting here rambling
for I don't know what are we ata half hour now, but hopefully I
(27:17):
guess someone else out therethat happens to listen to this
maybe finds himself in a similarspot.
They can, I guess, take comfortin knowing that they're not the
only one, that other peoplestruggle with this and God is
(27:39):
there for us, and as much assometimes we feel like it'd be
easier to sit across from atable from from God and have
these questions and and getanswers immediately, that it
(28:02):
wouldn't be a very fulfillingrelationship with God to just
have him on call and then say,all right, I'm done here, see
you later when I have moreproblems to bring up with you.
We know that we need to alwaysturn to God in prayer.
(28:24):
1 Thessalonians 5.17 praycontinually.
It's pretty straightforward.
As much as we go through theups and downs, maybe I'm the
only one that feels myself, orcatches myself, praying in the
(28:46):
highs and the lows more than theups and the downs on the way up
and on the way down of life.
Maybe I'm, I don't know, butit's a good reminder for myself
even and again, hopefully,someone else out there and can
(29:09):
relate um, and then you knowjust, I guess, in this part,
exodus 14.
The Lord will fight for you.
You need only to be stillPretty, pretty straightforward
(29:32):
there, right, it's prettystraightforward there.
God's on our side.
God loves us, god loves you.
Just keep going, keep going toGod in prayer, keep growing
(29:54):
closer to God.
And and the times where youfeel like you're in the lowest
parts of the lows, the next timeyou find yourself there you'll
know how to handle it.
You'll feel more confidentturning to God, even though you
(30:18):
may feel like you've donenothing but turn from him and
you've let yourself slip backinto old patterns of of sin,
your fleshly desires, whateverit might be.
But, like I said, hopefully thenext time you find yourself in
(30:43):
those lows, you find it easierto turn back to God, that God's
there waiting for us?
Something kind of off-topic, Iguess too.
I guess, to wrap up, I was thispast weekend.
(31:06):
I was at the Illinois statewrestling tournament.
We had some wrestlers qualify.
We were there and man I it'severy year and not just in
wrestling, I see it.
I'm obviously pretty busy andinvolved in sports and went
through the same same things inmy career, right, but wrestling
(31:34):
is such a like grueling sport.
It's such a long season forkids and especially if you cut
weight and like, if you do itlike me, not in a very good way,
so you do it like me, not in avery good way, so you make it
more miserable on yourself.
(31:56):
Um, you get to the statetournament and things don't go
your way.
I there were multiple timeswhere I saw kids that lost a
match or were eliminated.
Lost a match or were eliminatedand you can kind of tell what
other kids there don't haveteammates that also qualified
(32:17):
and that are there on their own,obviously with their coaches,
but on their own, or just kidsthat you know they qualify but
they don't feel like theydeserve to be there.
You know you can see stuff likethat and just by watching
people and seeing how they, Iguess, kind of carry themselves
around, and I always feel italways sucks to see people feel
(32:50):
like they don't deserve to bethere, like they don't belong
there, and that can be tied toso many different things.
I guess.
I guess the route I'm going isis we never know.
I guess I guess the route I'mgoing is is we never know the
(33:15):
struggles other people are goingthrough.
We never fully understand eventhe people that we're closest to
.
We never fully understand thestruggles that people go through
and the struggles that peoplego through.
And I guess it's just kind of areminder to, I guess, one check
in on the people that we careabout.
(33:35):
Make sure that they know thatwe're there for them, that
you're there for them, that youlove them, you care about them,
that you're there for them, thatyou love them, you care about
them and that, whatever they arestruggling with, if they don't
feel like opening up to you,that they know that God's always
(34:01):
there to talk to them and openup to them, to them and open up
to them.
Sometimes it's just being witha person.
If it's, you see someone youcare about just not that made,
(34:23):
just maybe seems off, that's notthemselves, and maybe they're
not someone that likes to openup a lot, but knowing that
sometimes just your presence,just being around them, whether
you're sitting in silence ortalking about things that are
silly, that are trivial, thatthat can help someone more than
(34:46):
you realize sometimes, who knowsthe goal going forward again, I
was just, I was so notmotivated to try to record this
and I still don't even know howgreat this will turn out Just
(35:11):
because I guess it's kind of aconfidence thing being able to
sit here by myself and putthoughts and pieces from the
Bible and the Word together.
That makes sense in a podcastepisode, really by myself.
It wasn't something I waslooking forward to.
Together that makes sense in apodcast episode, really by
myself.
It wasn't something I waslooking forward to.
(35:31):
But we, I want to have I'vesaid it the last two years and
it seems silly to keep saying,and maybe one day it'll happen,
but I want to be more consistentwith this, but I want to be
more consistent with this.
(35:52):
We want to be more consistentwith this um, looking at
probably having, uh, some moreguests over the next couple
months, especially while carteris still absent, and um, well,
yeah, I mean.
Well, I'll try to be moreactive, social, on social media,
keeping you guys updated.
(36:13):
So if you want to follow us oninstagram life beside christ
podcast on instagram, uh, emailus at life beside christ pod at
gmailcom.
Go ahead.
Us an email, shoot us a followor a message on Instagram.
Even if you want to write insome prayer requests, I'm more
(36:39):
than willing to do that on thepodcast or just add it to my own
personal prayers and I'm sureBrady and Carter would be more
than willing to do the same.
But, yeah, find us there, reachout to us.
(37:01):
And the other thing is I'd,since our last episode, we can
see, you know where people arelistening from, not obviously
not like who, but just wherepeople are listening from.
And it's it blows my mind.
Every time I see I open up youknow the app that kind of tracks
(37:22):
our, I guess, stats for thepodcast and we see a new
listener from Singapore orCalifornia, south Africa.
I mean it's crazy that peopleall over the country and all
over the world are Japan.
I mean it's crazy, it blows mymind that people from all over
(37:46):
the world in the country onetake the time to listen to us
and me ramble half the time.
But it's pretty cool, too thatto see that there are people all
over the world looking to learnmore about god, and in
different ways.
So I appreciate anyone wholistens to this and helps
(38:09):
support us.
Yeah, hopefully, hopefully thisisn't as bad as I think it is
in my head right now and youguys listening can gain
something from this ramblingthat I do.
(38:31):
Thank you for listening.
We will catch you on the nextone.
You.
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